>birthday on saturday
congratulations, I hope you had a nice cake.
However you are still young and if the mgtow life is not for you, you can still marry and start a family. Your options are still open. Maybe you can even find a non-degenerate traditional girl.
why do you need a purpose in life? Life has no greater purpose. We are bio-chemical reactors walking around the map, trying to satify our lizard brain desires. Our planet does not even represent a dust particle in the infinite universe. One the scale of the universe, we are irrelevant. There is no better purpose than to follow your dreams and goals. If you don't have any then you either already accomplished them or they were to easy to accomplish to begin with. Your personal purpose should not be declared by any other person than yourself. Find something you are passionate about, something you like to do and follow it. Don't ask yourself what the purpose is, you do it because it is fun and you like it. Simple as that.
People in relationships also have escapism but they have it in a different way. We have escapism in form of hobbies, money making, investing, video games, anime, TV and internet (some have also PUA short term relationships). They have escapism in form of perpetual fear of not beeing able to pay the bills for their middle class family life. They are occupied with this constant fear and they don't have the time to worry about different things (like Am I truly happy with my life? / Were my decissions so far the right ones? / etc). So if you were married by now you could have had the same situation but you might have had no time to even think about it.
I think American Beauty (2000) and Fight Club (1999) are some movies you should watch because they are about this same topic. It's about people trapped in the normalfag life and realizing they are not happy with the path the system gave them to follow. You need to find out too what your path should be.
Another aspect you need to look at some thing that is called "the cost of oppurtunity" in economics. It says with amount x in dollars you are limited to buy an amount of things but there are infinite possibilities what you could buy with x dollars. For example if you have 50'000$ you can buy a new car or re-invest it to make even more money but then you won't have a nice toy. You can also buy other stuff for 50 grand. There are unlimited possibilities what you could buy for amount x in dollars. In the end you need to decide what has priority and then buy only this with priority. This means you won't be able to fulfill all your desires at once or at all.
You don't only have a limited amount of money, you also have a limited amount of time in your life. You are not young forever. You probably won't be able to get family and career 100% perfectly done simultaneously.
Most career jobs will make you work much overtime and then you have less time for your family and hobbies. You will hate yourself in the end for betrying your family and yourself.
The other thing would be you work 9 to 5 but never get promoted and you will hate yourself too for not beeing able to provide more.
You can only concentrate your time on a few things you'd like to do if you want them done properly (never all of them at the same time). Also economists say people have theoretically infinite needs they want to satisfy. If you think about this then you will never be able to satisfy all your needs in your life. It is probably not even possible to be 100% happy in life because you have a limited amount of time to fulfill infinite needs and dreams.
If you feel alone maybe you should get a dog or join a club (philosophy or sport) where you meet other people to spend time with. Sport is always good because it makes you feel good and it's healthy.
Maybe you also have relatives who might be interested in doing something with you like a barbecue (we have summer now).