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/2hu/ - Touhou

Wch 2hu wud u fuq?

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ゆっくりしていってね! | Now appart of the >>>/thg/ World Order

File: 1451980596407.png (1.03 MB, 1024x768, 4:3, 1439853420367.png)

 No.36521

Assuming the only obstacle is their powers (no danmaku), which 2hu would be easiest to rape?

 No.36527

File: 1452018446095.png (728.4 KB, 750x678, 125:113, Kosuzu.png)

Kosuzu, obviously.


 No.36529

I'm willing to bet at least one would touch my penis willingly

>Yamame needs a mate to produce her brood this year

>sire new race of Spider Lords

>produce millions of young per year

>our babies overwhelm and subjugate all other youkai

>feels good man


 No.36530

>>36529

>implying female spiders would ever let a beta human male live.

You'll sire them, but you wont get much further than that.


 No.36531

File: 1452051594481.png (1.3 MB, 1200x2100, 4:7, 5be81ef1ea341bcc9c68fc3b38….png)

>>36529

Y-You do know what happens when spiders mate right?


 No.36532

>>36529

>>36530

>>36531

That's not even the problem here

He would probably die from some horrible sickness just by being near Yamamae before getting eaten


 No.36533

File: 1452054689674.png (Spoiler Image, 1.31 MB, 1500x1300, 15:13, ce575146f9e8aceab286822ac8….png)

>>36532

He is more likely to catch some kinda venereal disease you know if he survies the being eaten thing.


 No.36540

Probably a fairy

>dumb

>weak


 No.36544

File: 1452221414244.jpg (646.74 KB, 1920x1080, 16:9, clownpiece.jpg)

>>36521

you can rape any 2hu you want bro


 No.36573

>>36530

>>36531

>>36532

>>36533

Had youkai sex, doesn't matter


 No.36575

File: 1452560745034.png (563.3 KB, 600x848, 75:106, 99c84361fd55370612a2131501….png)

>>36573

Dude she is going to eat you!


 No.36579

>>36575

Vore is a fetish.


 No.36584

>>36579

Vore is a bad fetish for incorrect people.


 No.36586

File: 1452667502386.png (90.42 KB, 450x417, 150:139, chiin.png)

>>36584

Say that to my face irl, m8. i'll fite u.


 No.36612

>>36575

Spider males can only mate twice because their genitals are just balls of solid sperm on a stick (palps). After his palps are gone, his purpose is fulfilled, his biomass unproductive. By allowing himself to be eaten, he ensures his mate will have the nutrients she needs to produce the yolk in his babies' eggs. They are also total manlets, walking sacs of jizz optimized to deliver their genetic payload and nothing else.

Considering her human-like ability to communicate, it would not be hard to explain to her that a human male like myself is more valuable to her reproductive success alive than as food.

Furthermore, humans are born experts at manipulating their environments, any offspring I were to sire would have the human instincts to change their habitat to extract more resources from it than their pure-blooded competitors.


 No.36613

>>36612

I don't think she would have much use of you, aren't spider yokai like her master craftsmen? They can build an entire house in a single night etc?


 No.36644

>>36613

it really depends on how fast it takes her to lay her clutch of eggs. if that time is very short a human man's long term food gathering advantage might be outweighed by the short term food gain of eating him.


 No.36709

File: 1453592789396.jpg (316.66 KB, 1920x1080, 16:9, qQwex0H.jpg)

>>36644

Oh yeah, I'm totally certain that you could just waltz out of the underworld and drag a deer back, avoiding other youkai all the while. I'm sure that Yamame, someone who is objectively stronger, faster, and craftier than you has the good human sense to just let your freeloading ass go after you've outlived your usefulness.


 No.36772

File: 1454024355693.jpg (65.17 KB, 1440x900, 8:5, BrNC4.jpg)

If you factor in intellect then Rumia would be a good choice(as far as a raping yokai ideas go). Reasons are many. Number one - knocking her out is very easy, just be near a sturdy tree and she will knock herself out. Number two, a flashlight is enough to distract her if things go south for some reason. Number three - she has no lasting side effects. Number four - She is less likely to remember/understand what happened to her. Number five - she resembles a cute little girl(unlike some hags I could name). The minuses are not as serious as with others. Just make sure the bow does not untie on her head and she is properly restrained/unconscious.


 No.36773

>>36772

>implying I won't pull the bow off during the deed

>implying she won't turn into a busty ara ara mature-hu

>implying she won't give me the best fugging of all time as thanks for setting her free


 No.36775

File: 1454029470574.jpg (67.27 KB, 1920x1080, 16:9, ExRumia.jpg)

>>36773

>she won't give me the best fugging of all time as thanks for setting her free

That is indeed unlikely.


 No.36776

>>36773

>implying she won't test out her newly restored power by ripping you in half

you're basically unleashing lvl25 shadowfiend into the world


 No.36791

File: 1454073432924.jpg (214.37 KB, 813x982, 813:982, 82937134613515.jpg)

If one is into insects then Wriggle Nightbug looks like an easy option. Just grab a can of bug spray to fend of her "power" of calling insects to her aid and you can even do it without knocking her/him out. Though she/he can have her revenge by sendin lice on you later or something, so I would still advise chloroform or a mask or a bag on head or a blindfold. Also, during winter she can call fuck-all asistance, so that's exploitable. If one crazy motherfucker does this, I implore him/her to report back on the actual genitalia of the matter at hand.


 No.36798

File: 1454088984809-0.jpg (1.69 MB, 1544x2424, 193:303, 799107e842861bd3146dbf6d7b….jpg)

File: 1454088984809-1.jpg (200.48 KB, 800x1132, 200:283, 4bf855dcf33c73e3536eeafe88….jpg)

File: 1454088984809-2.png (1.62 MB, 1063x1500, 1063:1500, 1eeef0fce2226cb62f9d548c3e….png)

Raping 2hus in general is not only a foolish endeavor but one that will also most likely result in your death, crippling injury, mind being broken or other horrible things happening to you.

But don't worry for I'm here to help you with this rape guide.

Before doing anything stupid, remember Rule Number 1:

You do not need to needlessly endanger yourself, if all you want to do is a rape 2hu

For there are plenty of 2hu characters with zero potentially harmful power other than their pure bodily strength.

These 2hus are: Kosozu Motori, Renk Usami, Maribel Hearn and Hieda no Akkyu

You can rape them with the same difficulty you would rape a normal human.

But I understand that these characters are not big enough of a 'game' for some of you, so let me tell you the secrets to disabling a variety of powerful 2hus, using nothing but your intelligence and wits.

Rape tactic number 2: Lower their guards.

Requirements: The 2hu in question must be friendly to humans, a character with good alignment is the best. They also need to have a physical strength that is similar to humans.

What you gonna need: Convincing and helpless look, acting skills, a blunt non lethal object or anything that can achieve the same effect.

Characters it can be used on: Marisa Kirisame, Alice Margatroid, Shikieiki Yamaxanadu, Keine Kamishirawa,

This tactic relies entirely on exploiting the good nature of these 2hu, quite despicable, but that hardly matters when you are planning to rape somebody either way. What you need to do is dirty or even wound yourself a little to create an illusion that you are either in danger or lost in some way, then approach any of these listed 2hus and they will most likely help you and even take you into their houses to care for you wounds. But be careful with the Yama for she might be able to sense your intentions.

Once you are done with the first phase all you need to do now is neutralize the 2hu, in other words knock them out. You can achieve this via a quick and hard hit to the head, applying some sleeping pills or other similar methods.

The point is that it is going to work, for the physiology of these characters, despite wielding formidable powers are essentially the same as a humans, unless you were stupid enough to visit Keine on a full moon, a good hard hit should take out any of them.

Tactic number 3:

Do not rape at night, seriously just don't.

Most carnivorous youkai are active during night, gain a boost to their power and have much sharper senses than you can ever hope to match in the veil of darkness. If you want to rape a youkai, always do it during the day.

Tactic number 4: Use their loved ones against them

Requirements: The 2hu in question must have another 2hu that is precious to her

Applicable on: Ran Yakumo, Satori Komeiji, Aki Sisters, Fujiwara no Mokou, etc.

As you might have guessed it, this tactic relies on exploiting the 2hus feelings for someone they love, by kidnapping and then ransoming them.

However as you are just a mere normal human, even kidnapping those 2hus might be a hard or even impossible task.

But there is a catch, you do not actually need to kidnap anybody, you just need to create the illusion of kidnapping.

Chen and Komeiji: Just play/befriend and invite them to your house to play, then go to Ran/Satori and lie that you kidnapped them, proceed into ransom rape scene. But be careful to hide your thoughts from the Satori, or your plan will be ruined and you will most likely die a horrible death.

Keine: Apply tactic number 2 and call Mokou

Aki sisters: Very weak for gods and with insignificant power, just approach one during harvest and put her into a sack when she is not expecting it.


 No.36799

File: 1454089096258-0.png (294.49 KB, 885x732, 295:244, 315dde7ae8dd4a3a11d034c325….png)

File: 1454089096288-1.jpg (709.75 KB, 1300x800, 13:8, bdaa6ad24c56143619f02fd6a7….jpg)

File: 1454089096290-2.jpg (325.34 KB, 748x1000, 187:250, 2b98dbf7ed046162691e85fc61….jpg)

Tactic number 5: Learn their habits and movement patterns.

Many 2hus frequent certain locations/areas or have particular habits that you can exploit for your pleasure, all you need to do is learn these habits.

Requirement: 2hu with repetitive action/routine

Suika Ibuki: She regularly hangs out near the Hakurei Shrine and gets herself drunk, just rape her when she falls asleep, but watch out for Reimu.

Rumia: She flies around like an ⑨ and doesn't even sees where she is going, hang a net with some charms near a tree and wait for her to fly into it. You can easily ask Reimu or Hijiri to make an anti youkai charm for you.

Cirno: Regularly freezes frogs near the misty lake, approach her from behind and take her, it shouldn't be that hard.

Komachi: Frequently lazes on the job, wait for her to fall asleep and attempt rape. Due to her good nature she will most likely not kill you even if she wakes up, but you will probably have your ass kicked.

Tactic number 6: Exploit their racial weaknesses

Requirement: The 2hu in question must have some kind of racial weakness that you can exploit

Lets face it this is the only way you will ever rape high tier 2hus.

Oni's: Pitfall full of soybeans, lure them with sake. Sticky rape

Remilia Scarlet: Lure her outside during day: Smoldering rape. Or Flood the Scarlet Devil Mansion with water, extremely risky as the other members will most likely apprehend you with this.

Nitori: Cucumbers

Kogasa: Feed her with surprises

Mizuhashi Parsee: Exploit her limitless jealousy

Seija: Exploit her reverse nature

Warning number 7: Do not attempt to rape the unrapable

Description: Many 2hus are simply so goddamn powerful that you simply cannot do shit against them even with the best of your wits.

Yukari: Even before you yourself decide to rape Yukari, she will already know about your plans, Yukari cant be raped unless she wants to be raped.

IzayoI: Time Control makes every attempt meaningless

Reimu: Ex-Tier Intuition, she will sense your ill intentions before you even make a move

Toyosatomimi no Miko: You cant hide your desires from her, Reimu and Yukari scenario again

Tojiko and Mima: Lack of sexual organs, makes penetration hard

Momiji: 2km eyesight and excellent hearing and smelling. Exploiting her is unlikely given her location

Warning number 8: Be vary of stds

Do not rape Yamame, Suwako or Hina Kagiyama

Though its not like they are easy targets either way.

Warning number 9: Do not stick your dick in crazy

Even if you manage to stick your dick inside, it is bound to end bad for you.

So don't do either Flandre or Mizuhashi Parsee for your own sake

Parsee should be quite an easy target though if you manage to survive the journey into hell, but it would be the after that would be horrible

Warning number 10: Try to prevent testicular cancer

Do not fuck Utsuho


 No.36800

>>36799

I wonder if pissing counts as flowing water? What consequences are there for a vampire trying to cross flowing waters? What if the flowing water comes to her?

If Remilia wet her bed, would she die?


 No.36806

File: 1454100063302.jpg (179.56 KB, 1200x1000, 6:5, ShikieikiYamaxanadu.jpg)

>>36798

>raping the the Yama

That goes into tier 9 danger level, she will know about this and she will have you by the balls(in all senses). Besides she can order an army of death Gods around, or worse, those guys will take their own initiative on revenge.


 No.36826

File: 1454137739256.png (785.08 KB, 986x1000, 493:500, 1443707550271-3.png)

>>36800

It would be extremely painful


 No.36831

YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.

>>36806

Speaking of the Yama, this has been out for a while


 No.36833

File: 1454154402689.jpg (91.42 KB, 480x360, 4:3, 421312.jpg)

>>36831

>that youmu apology to eiki

ADORABLE


 No.36836

File: 1454171173932.png (143.97 KB, 311x301, 311:301, big guy.png)

>>36826

She's a big girl


 No.36838

>>36831

Oh fuck, a new episode!?

I had zero idea!

Ty based fairy


 No.36934

File: 1454383981662.png (538 KB, 545x567, 545:567, smug marisa.png)

>>36831

Once again, a memory of phantasm where nothing of note happens. Remember when they did the first one and it was all of PCB in 3 minutes?

It was worth watching to get this new smug 2hu though


 No.36942

>>36934

It was alright in my opinion, it was fun to see the characters interact

If I want fights I can just watch MMD videos, which are much better for that purpose than fanmade animations with 0 budget


 No.37033

File: 1454614957596-0.png (1.45 MB, 1013x2034, 1013:2034, QuickMemo _2015-12-19-16-4….png)

File: 1454614957609-1.png (1.37 MB, 883x886, 883:886, QuickMemo _2016-01-04-20-4….png)

File: 1454614957609-2.jpg (63.4 KB, 1024x576, 16:9, kaijidrill.jpg)

File: 1454614957647-3.png (547.29 KB, 457x570, 457:570, 1451864940627.png)

File: 1454614957649-4.png (2.11 MB, 2560x1440, 16:9, Screenshot_2016-01-27-20-1….png)

>>36831

>Been waiting for Mokou to finally get some spoken lines of dialogue

>Last episode only had her for a total of 8 seconds

>new episode hype

>Expecting something at least worth the wait of 5 fucking episodes for Best Girl to start talking

>She leaves as soon as the episode starts

Well, I guess I have a reason to finally use that gun with a single bullet in it that I always keep next to my bed.

I just hope they do Imperishable Night next since they already have an animated opening for it. Then again that might just be a big cocktease and they might end up using for Mountain of Faith or something.


 No.37041

>>36831

>Wanted to see more Yuuka playing with faries and getting it misinterpreted as her doing cruel and unusual punishment.

>Literally skipping Yuuka aka best Phantasmagoria of Flower View story.

Even though I thought that Eiki was done great, it was still them completely F'ing around.

>PoFV wasn't just them fucking around since the situation was resolved long before any of the protags in that game started their "investigations" but the effects could not be stopped.

Yeah, its technically accurate I guess, but wher was the flying and shootings, or Yuuka being a lovable smug cunt to everyone.


 No.37042

File: 1454645698479.png (753.7 KB, 1066x600, 533:300, 214213.png)

>>37033

There there. At least you got a small glimpse of tengu boob


 No.37043

>>37041

that moment where yuuka put the flower in cirno's hair melted my heart. I guess I would have liked seeing more of it, but I did like eiki's scenes.


 No.37044

File: 1454650188027.gif (6.59 MB, 310x174, 155:87, nyotengu_bikini__animated_….gif)

>>37042

Consolation prizes are never as good as the original.




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