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/ meta / / new / / mumu /

hi mom

File: 1450050552775.jpg (134.24 KB, 1000x752, 125:94, Eugene Onegin and Vladimir….jpg)

 No.3031

my life is so boring

 No.3032

ppl with nonboring lives tell me your secrets


 No.3033

File: 1450052587557.jpg (26.81 KB, 540x413, 540:413, me.jpg)

>>3031

i dont want to be alive anymore


 No.3034

>>3033

listen to some music my man

it'll be alright


 No.3035

kill me


 No.3036

>>3032

Start murdering people. It's exhilirating.


 No.3037

>>3036

are you a sociopath?


 No.3040

>>3037

Possibly. I'm not sure

Sociopaths supposedly don't have much empathy or fear, and I have both to a degree. Maybe it works a bit differently but it's there.

How do you even tell? I'm not sure on the exact definition these days.


 No.3041

>>3040

Yeah those are two things.

Psychopaths have some brain differences, like it's hard for them to stay interested in doing repetitive tasks and they are more prone to boredom so they seek stimulation from exciting things (like killing people), probably why the other anon asked you.

Lack of empathy and fear could result from many things, but one thing with psychopaths that was different was their bodily reactions to threatening situations or watching macabre films, like they don't experience rise in heartbeat and skin getting warmer etc. if they get threatened physically or watch films about mutilating babies or see blood or something.

What was the difference between psychopathy and sociopathy? First is innate and latter by environment?

If you got physically abused a lot as a kid, you know beaten up and not getting any love or affection or mirroring from mom (so your mirror neurons don't develope correctly and this harms empathy and so) this has been linked to causing psychopathic tendencies. Also I think they tend to torture and kill animals and do crimes as kid more often.

Then there are the usual things about lying, manipulating, delusions of grandeur, emotional shallowness and superficial charm, lack of guilt and incapability of accepting responsibility, blaming others, understanding moral values like what's wrong and good but not "getting them", like not caring about them but using them only for further manipulation. Like if you never have felt having something on your conscience that would tell something. Then most have impulsiviness that leads to promiscuity, crimes, violence and lack of long term goals, but the hollywood psychopaths who are successful can delay gratification and become doctors or bankers.


 No.3042

>>3041

>What was the difference between psychopathy and sociopathy? First is innate and latter by environment?

I think it varies definitions a lot. When I was taught at school I was told the difference was that psychopath = manipulative/charming/social skills etc, and sociopath = disorganised, anti-social etc.

But I've heard the definiton you gave before as well.

>not getting any love or affection or mirroring from mom

but why if it's only from the mother ? The father doesnt make a difference?

Anyway from what you've said and what I've researched before I don't think I'm a psychopath or a sociopath by strict definitons. Just derranged in other ways.


 No.3043

>>3042

I suppose it doesn't make a difference as long as it is someone doing it right

but you probably know better if you've been taught it, i base mine only to what i've read on image boards


 No.3044

>>3042

Have you actually killed anyone though? Just out of curiosity. I've never had the opportunity to chat with a murderer


 No.3045

you should go clean up your room


 No.3046

When I was conscripted one of my subordinates in army was probably a psychopath, he would always have problems with obeying rules and so on and constantly was hard to deal with. He was very hard to read because at times he would act very sissy-like, like he had this tic-movement that caused his jaw to tremble like he was about to cry and generally looked like a babby, was among the shittiest of all privates, constantly wearing stuff in wrong way and doing everything wrong, but at other times it was clear he was capable of doing things correctly if he only wanted, and then suddenly he might get mad about something like not being able to find something which made him punch a wall so hard his knuckles started to bleed. Scary stuff. Sometimes if you would talk to him he wouldn't look you in the eyes and at other times he had this sinister, piercing look. Very erratic guy all in all.

At some point he started having panic attacks, i.e. like if we had to go out fast and put on battle equipment he would literally spend 15 minutes trying to get socks on and then started crying and shouting like a baby, or if we got already outside he would just collapse in to the ground crying and just stay there catatonically and complain about how he was too tired to continue. Just these confusing melt-downs that were hard to watch since we kinda knew he was just playing but you had to take it seriously (there could be big uproar if you just told a rookie to man up and stop acting since there were people with real problems, but with him it was p obvious it was all pretense). You wouldn't know if it was more pathetic or disgusting. When we went to the shooting range we were always afraidly joking if he would shoot himself or others.

He was deemed unfit for service maybe after a month (we obviously told about him to higher officers) and when he got the releasing papers he was suddenly normal and jovial again. I remember changing some of my stuff with him (they got some never gear than us and it doesn't make a difference what you return to the material center after you leave), and in the exchange it was clear to me and him that he was just playing earlier, like you know we smirked in that way like yeah we know, non-verbal communication. Weeks later one of our mates met him at a bar during holiday and he bragged about how he was merely pretending to be retarded to get out from there.

He came out more as pathetic, extremely unbalanced guy even though he reminded typical Patrick Bateman in many ways, he was pretty good looking, had won some competition in mathematics and was among the best chin-up pullers in Finland winning some national competitions, so there certainly was no problems with his health nor was he too stupid to wear things correctly, so it was clear he was doing it on purpose. Also during the visitor day his family visited and he had like 13-year-old girlfriend and apparently saw nothing wrong or weird in that.

No one particularly liked him and he went really far with his act, pretty disgusting person in general now that I think about it. It was like he had no shame or pride but still is pretty successful in life, he seems to be in banking and insurance currently now that I googled him lel.

I don't think any of us considered him to be a psychopath at the time, and even for me it clicked couple years later, that he fits most of the characteristics. The thing is he didn't come out as cool and collected what you think of some movie archetype but was rather explosive and just bewildering with the lenghts that he went with his act, like how can anyone live with himself after doing that kind of shit, like he had the target of getting out and was ready to manipulate the shit out of everything to reach that goal and didn't give a flying shit about what others thought of him. Seriously if he had shat his pants one day none of us would've been surprised. And also like what you can do with a person like that? When one has no shame or remorse. Kind of like if you tried to engage you couldn't win since he doesn't learn from punishments and even lacks the means to truly understand any moral values. You would only end up stressing yourself etc. I guess they really are a different species.


 No.3047

>>3045

my room is very clean

i don't like your implications, just because i experience my daily life boring doesn't mean i am automatically incapable of keeping myself and my surroundings clean


 No.3048

File: 1450101797653.jpeg (60.88 KB, 634x342, 317:171, image.jpeg)

whats so boring about it?

whats ur daily routine?


 No.3051

>>3048

go to uni

come home to computer

occasionally read some book or go for a walk or to movies etc.

i know i should just get friends or some shit like if i had significant people in my life it would help as you could share your life events and the meaning would emerge from that, like shit means stuff when it is validated by the affirmative recognition from other people

i just like to complain about life in the internet and never actually do anything to make it better tbh


 No.3052

>>3051

>Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them.

this is how i feel about my life^^


 No.3053

File: 1450110710193.jpeg (40.43 KB, 416x234, 16:9, image.jpeg)

>>3051

doesnt sound so bad

at least you leave your house. that is pretty dynamic. you go to uni and interact with people, indirectly at least

a "non-boring" life doesnt have to be skydyiving and rocket climbing everyday, but maybe find a hobby that you enjoy and do it whenever you feel bored.

when i get bored, i pick up the guitar and jam for a while

as for friends, that's what we're here for buddy ;)


 No.3058

>>3044

Unfortunately not. I aspire to fix that in the near future


 No.3061

Going for job interview tomorrow with border security, after forking over almost a grand to get certified in guns, cpr, going to shooting range driving 2 hrs to interview place x2 finishing physical and getting doctors approval it boils down to tomorrow. If I fail I can't reapply for 2 years and I'm fucked, straight fucked, if I pass few more things but I'm not overtly worried. Interview is 1.5 hrs and I'll let you know tomorrow,

Signing off,

Rub-rob


 No.3062

Itt: someone needs to read/reread catcher in the rye. STAT.


 No.3066

File: 1450184842568.jpg (121.36 KB, 1024x768, 4:3, spurdo express.jpg)

>>3061

what country?


 No.3069

>>3066

>>3066

Canada, went well will find out in 6-8 weeks my results. 6 morally ambiguous questions basically boiling down to if your a rat or not. Of course I said I was a rat for all of them which feels badman but once I have job I'll go as the flow


 No.3114

>>3032

Suck cocks, big ones.


 No.3121

>>3053

>a "non-boring" life doesnt have to be skydyiving and rocket climbing everyday, but maybe find a hobby that you enjoy and do it whenever you feel bored.

yeah yeah i didn't really even mean in this kind of sense

like even all of those things are ultimately pretty irrelevant, i meant more in the sense that i'm lacking some greater purpose in life, like i'm not living my life to its fullest, not in the sense that i should hitchhike to indochina or something but just that the main story is out of focus

i don't know even if i picked up the guitar after a while the thought of "there must be more to life" would pop up into my head

it's not that i wouldn't know how to appreciate the little things and enjoy hobbies but you begin to wonder if that is all there is

but maybe i just need to suck it up

>as for friends, that's what we're here for buddy ;)

thanks i love you too hun

but still i do feel like needing some irl relationships

i dunno why but i used to go pretty well just browsing nets and not caring about anything but now suddenly have gotten increasingly anxious about loneliness

>>3062

i have not read it as of yet

interestingly i was recommended it on another chan too not long ago, i'm gonna read it now during the holidays or after if I don't manage to finish first the ones I'm currently reading


 No.3123

>>3121

>interestingly i was recommended it on another chan too not long ago

It is very popular with teenage autists, so


 No.3124

>>3121

>interestingly i was recommended it on another chan too not long ago

It is very popular with teenage autists, so


 No.3125

>>3123

so it will be perfect for me!


 No.3128

>>3121

Everyone dies alone dude, no matter how many friends they have irl

>>3123

I'm reading a book called the self illusion right now that recently talked about autists. They're actually super interesting, and have unique psychological properties in terms of self awareness and so forth.

Your sense of self is curated in large part from your cognitive projection of what others are thinking and in turn what you imagine others think of yourself. A test of this awareness was done with children - when presented with a candy box, and asked what was inside, they said candy. The box was opened to reveal pencils were inside, upon which the children were asked what some man across the room who hasn't seen the pencils would answer to "what is inside the box?". Children under age 4 answer "pencils" - unable to project or grasp what others think of reality.

Autists, like the three year olds (though to varying degrees), exhibit this same psychological trait, and in their inability to empathetically connect or predict what others are thinking find social interaction very difficult. This in turn has weird consequences that I haevn't finished reading about yet in terms of how they conceptualize themselves. Instead of seeing their self or person through the mirror that society and social interaction provides, they must construct it in some alternatively trippy way that I haven't yet read.


 No.3130

>>3128

gat a link fam?


 No.3150

>>3128

>Everyone dies alone dude

suicide bombers don't

jus saiyan


 No.3152

>>3130

Not him but I'd assume it's this one:

>The Self Illusion: How the Social Brain Creates Identity

http://gen.lib.rus.ec/book/index.php?md5=c4f8944d1d04baa2df80d73976981043

>>3128

>Everyone dies alone dude

what a stupid ass thing to say like seriously

i don't care about how many friends i have at the moment i die obviously, i care how many i have while i am alive

maybe you sociopaths and autists can live fine in complete solitude but i am suffering


 No.3153

So I was gonna reccomend you check out some fetish sites and join a BDSM underground but then I realized thats mine fantasy not yours, so I then thought about reccomending you checking out your local e-classifies and joining a sports team, pref volleyball or softball IDK Where you live however, its a great way to stay in shape and being on someones team is a great way to feel good as well. Just tell them your new to town and that back in Ohio you were one of the best volleyball players you ever met. Whether true or not should be funny as long as you aint any autistic scum. (Which you are). Alternatively join AA or NA and reap those benefits of hearing people bitch about getting their kids taken away and youll learn true bottom


 No.3159

File: 1450749134556.jpg (50.6 KB, 640x637, 640:637, Nuts.jpg)

>>3150

hahahahallal

>>3152

I'm just playin homie. The reason I use heroin is mostly because I'm lonely as fuck rn. Girlfriend went back home to Lisbon for the holidays and my brother is off with his gf, and most my good friends all moved away for grad school. And here I am using more heroin when the biggest reason I'm not currently studying medicine at McGill with new friends in my life because of all the fuckin drugs I've gone and gotten addicted to…


 No.3175

>>3152

and yeah it is that book. It's pretty good - I recommend it highly




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