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/abc/ - Alternative /b/ Cancer

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Winner of the 72rd Attention-Hungry Games
/otter/ - The Church of Otter

February 2019 - 8chan Transparency Report
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Rainbow colors reversed!

b184c4  No.2324[Reply]



(كم يدفع اليهود لك؟)

f0c4be  No.2326

File: 6bd4a2bce0a6a56⋯.jpg (21.59 KB, 192x262, 96:131, 016.jpg)

33d871  No.2345


Thanks Allan Snackbar

0d075a  No.2347

There was this one time, at Band Camp, when we tried to raid the snackbar. Brut it was locked, so we couldn't. Bit of an anti-climax, really. Just like this thread.

000000  No.2358

File: ef8be9fe9ea38d7⋯.png (2.36 MB, 1826x1080, 913:540, ClipboardImage.png)

dddb29  No.2060[Reply]

what is your drug of choice?

11 posts and 3 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

d85411  No.2258


With milk.

Fight me, fuckers!

14885c  No.2261

File: ba29842202c4201⋯.jpeg (51.11 KB, 800x533, 800:533, umaru234.jpeg)



>with milk

Anon, that will make your teeth go grey.

428ca8  No.2269

File: ad20b233b9312ae⋯.jpg (30.37 KB, 473x311, 473:311, 023ba.jpg)

000000  No.2331


Kill and eat that girl!


aecafb  No.2332



File: 5fb014fb8bcaa65⋯.jpg (53.27 KB, 600x360, 5:3, Windows_Vs_Mac_Vs_Linux_9.jpg)

be7de4  No.2288[Reply]

Is this accurate?

70d5c3  No.2290


Dub Dubs... which one would be best to run my Windows 3.1 with?

23014a  No.2294

File: 6553792e8032929⋯.jpg (68.69 KB, 740x490, 74:49, umaru156.jpg)


>Is this accurate?

No it's not. Last time I checked computers didn't bark.

A more apt comparison is with murder tools:

Mac = rubber dildo

Windows = .45 handgun

Linux = hammer and sickle

fdb315  No.2297

File: ad20b233b9312ae⋯.jpg (30.37 KB, 473x311, 473:311, 023ba.jpg)

File: 6c2c940218446dc⋯.jpg (31.77 KB, 473x311, 473:311, 023baa.jpg)


Go back to your abacus, faggot

4ef6af  No.2314


All are bad, 3ds is best.

File: 93d9c3dbf7a0130⋯.png (403.84 KB, 650x1976, 25:76, life.png)

8b3cf5  No.2287[Reply]

peak boomer

ef7164  No.2291


It's just easier being a flaming homosexual... plus it makes landing a turd so much easier.

File: 9eb0b484ff28cee⋯.jpg (26.57 KB, 400x270, 40:27, prodigy_web.jpg)

11f504  No.2238[Reply]

How is the new week treating you, Umaru?

8 posts and 4 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

507003  No.2271

File: ad20b233b9312ae⋯.jpg (30.37 KB, 473x311, 473:311, 023ba.jpg)

d7a69c  No.2272

File: 23f6b1dd34205f3⋯.gif (303.8 KB, 500x281, 500:281, umaru115.gif)

>umaruhitting in my own home

560e72  No.2273

File: ad20b233b9312ae⋯.jpg (30.37 KB, 473x311, 473:311, 023ba.jpg)

File: 85c6f0799c0fbee⋯.jpg (7.7 KB, 236x233, 236:233, 023ba1.jpg)

File: e1814f1c6b2d290⋯.jpg (25.43 KB, 405x338, 405:338, 023bb.jpg)



560e72  No.2274

File: 36a062e85cdd7ec⋯.jpg (27.98 KB, 336x344, 42:43, 023bb1.jpg)

File: c7c5f99c8649607⋯.jpg (31.99 KB, 426x441, 142:147, 023bc.jpg)

File: bf49fcf93c8400d⋯.jpg (45.35 KB, 599x487, 599:487, 023bc1.jpg)

bcf6f0  No.2275

File: ad20b233b9312ae⋯.jpg (30.37 KB, 473x311, 473:311, 023ba.jpg)

File: 6c2c940218446dc⋯.jpg (31.77 KB, 473x311, 473:311, 023baaa.jpg)

File: e637148c6e761b5⋯.png (298.32 KB, 960x800, 6:5, e63.png)

257c3e  No.2178[Reply]

My daily /abc/ shitpost

2 posts and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view.

359eef  No.2249

Fact #385: Semen can make girls fat.

165952  No.2251

File: a9ba6ae434c80df⋯.jpg (221.22 KB, 960x1280, 3:4, umaru130.jpg)


Any proofs? And if it's true how come gays aren't all huge hulks of fat? Riddle me fat, shitposter.

5ab68e  No.2257


Retarded post #2249


You really outdid yourself this time.

165952  No.2264

File: 240eeccf95c665c⋯.jpg (90.19 KB, 699x996, 233:332, umaru85.jpg)


I do my best.

d47cae  No.2270

File: ad20b233b9312ae⋯.jpg (30.37 KB, 473x311, 473:311, 023ba.jpg)

bdb958  No.2124[Reply]

i love cp!!!

16 posts and 9 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

911b7a  No.2236

File: 1b53822b47cbcee⋯.jpg (24.65 KB, 571x451, 571:451, 134c.jpg)

a03cfc  No.2259

File: 42ea9b1faa396b5⋯.jpg (65.73 KB, 501x535, 501:535, 072.jpg)

OK, that's enough. It's time to take me home, Mickey. You won't? You leave me all alone, Mickey.

735f68  No.2263

File: aa5a37b956515bb⋯.jpg (12.09 KB, 480x269, 480:269, umaru247.jpg)


Here, take this cape. Pedos hate it. In fact you can tell who's a pedo just by their reaction when you wear it.

4ae8c9  No.2265

File: 06975a416991e33⋯.jpg (21.47 KB, 328x329, 328:329, 011.jpg)

4ae8c9  No.2268

File: ad20b233b9312ae⋯.jpg (30.37 KB, 473x311, 473:311, 023ba.jpg)

File: 00ba99ea1dfa2f8⋯.png (1.68 MB, 1920x1080, 16:9, e5IYQ9v.png)

f936e6  No.2153[Reply]

Umaruposter is the best poster on 8chan


4bd690  No.2154

File: 520bb7951f6d214⋯.jpg (41.81 KB, 474x711, 2:3, umaru65.jpg)


And your compliment was the best and so far the only one I've ever gotten! <3

fde582  No.2157

File: 84d8bd07aed3a30⋯.webm (381.72 KB, 226x210, 113:105, oh-holy-shitballs.webm)

fea187  No.2267

File: ad20b233b9312ae⋯.jpg (30.37 KB, 473x311, 473:311, 023ba.jpg)

File: ea8727d633b1bba⋯.png (167.61 KB, 1436x381, 1436:381, 2019-02-20-091645_1436x381….png)

e16a42  No.2223[Reply]


419423  No.2228

File: 10a5d36dc6085d4⋯.jpg (35.81 KB, 326x301, 326:301, 004a.jpg)


Apparently, your Guardian Angel is embarrassed for you, as well.

5c5cb3  No.2260


And who can blame him?

9d48a7  No.2262

File: db492ef766a12e3⋯.jpeg (247.67 KB, 1500x1500, 1:1, umaru238.jpeg)

What are y'all Jews doing here on my board... What is this thread even about?

baeed2  No.2266

File: d5f819f0fc6b52f⋯.jpg (17.04 KB, 305x368, 305:368, 077.jpg)

File: 7258983922303c8⋯.png (81.91 KB, 280x280, 1:1, 1641481__safe_screencap_ra….png)

b85f35  No.2127[Reply]

Can we get

rainbow text

instead of this sickly green?

24 posts and 8 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

f90921  No.2226


Nice sauce with your pasta, anon.

000000  No.2230

What the say did you just say fuck me about, you bitching a little?

I'll have you graduate I know top of my Seals in the Navy Classes,

and I've been raided in numerou Al Quaeda secret involvements, and I

have killed over 300 confirmations. I am a trained gorilla. In warfare,

I'm the sniper arm in the entire US force tops. You are targeting me

but I'm just another nothing. I will fuck you with precision the wipes

which has never been liked before on this scene. Earth, fuck my marking

words. You can get away with thinking that shit over me to the Internet?

Fuck again, thinker. As we spy I am networking my secret speaking across

the trace and your IP is being prepared right now so you better storm

the maggots. The wipes that storms out of the little pathetic thing.

Life you call yours? Your fucking dead kids. I can be any time. I can

weigh you in over seven hundred kills, and that's my bear hands. Not only

am I extensively accessed by trains, but I have no arms for combatting the

entire arsenal United States, and I will use it to wipe your miserable ass.

You shit the faceoff of the continent. If you only could have commented

what unholy cleverness your little "retribution" was about. To bring down

upon you, maybe you would have fucked your tongue. But you wouldn't, you

shouldn't, and now youPost too long. Click here to view the full text.

8888bc  No.2231

File: 352991da4cf470f⋯.jpg (184.63 KB, 1024x1536, 2:3, umaru201.jpg)



That's no good, fren.

b9b410  No.2235


You look good inside your locked padded cell

000000  No.2313


File: 69aa4ea631338b4⋯.jpg (46.12 KB, 462x500, 231:250, 1450957325276.jpg)

648e5b  No.2202[Reply]

Hi Umaru

2 posts and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view.

21f6c8  No.2205


Must be something to do with Little One forget to take his meds today. Sad puppy.

bdc13a  No.2211

File: c3e043ab981dc62⋯.jpg (304.52 KB, 1080x1920, 9:16, umaru123.jpg)



You just hate me cause I'm black.

648e5b  No.2213



bdc13a  No.2214

File: 47e383ad2264e75⋯.jpg (155.8 KB, 650x642, 325:321, bansheemaru.jpg)


Embrace the Umaru. That's what you're here for.

00d224  No.2218

File: ff6ec90ecc3137b⋯.jpg (25.53 KB, 500x349, 500:349, 101a.jpg)

File: 2044bcc92e7248f⋯.jpg (72.55 KB, 1200x1200, 1:1, 1522460452967.jpg)

602dda  No.2183[Reply]


i think i lost count at words

602dda  No.2184

i don't even want to talk now because someone found my art and i feel scared

218e9f  No.2185

File: f6fdaf659405a8d⋯.jpg (65.44 KB, 650x975, 2:3, umaru96.jpg)



What are you talking about friend?

f1f177  No.2188


Awww... did one autist not understand another autist?

File: f53d12459f096cd⋯.png (80.09 KB, 1337x2849, 191:407, taggo.png)

a8e856  No.2144[Reply]

hello, is this the krusty krab?

>pic unrelated

1 post and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view.

a8e856  No.2147


I was only joking.

I don't really think it is what I think it is.

Hello, though.

27a930  No.2149

File: 78667d836c24258⋯.jpg (45.74 KB, 1024x682, 512:341, umaru88.jpg)


Hello and welcome to where freedom becomes cancer!

f11e49  No.2150

Hello. You'll be really interested to know, that I just gave birth to a turd so large, I was legally obligated to give it a name, "Stephen"!

27a930  No.2155

File: acf428cc727126c⋯.jpg (557.91 KB, 1800x1200, 3:2, umaru60.jpg)


But what if you guessed its gender wrong?

712721  No.2156


How DARE you try to assume the gender of that turd!?!

File: 184f174e4400816⋯.png (390.03 KB, 3028x2270, 1514:1135, 1516616__safe_artist-colon….png)

68a4f2  No.2012[Reply]

What other boards do you fags (the whole two of you) browse?

I'll go first:

/r9k/, /tv/, /sudo/, /tech/

10 posts and 2 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

3cb280  No.2135

Check this scientifically-verified link:

597bbf  No.2139

File: 40b2ef196b48397⋯.jpg (75.09 KB, 384x708, 32:59, umaru191.jpg)


Don't take him seriously pone, he says the same thing about umarus.

9db59e  No.2141

File: f093c84831e41f2⋯.jpg (73.58 KB, 660x660, 1:1, 104ba.jpg)



Special People Gather Together!

597bbf  No.2145

File: 570cfc73aaf7b96⋯.jpg (40.38 KB, 1001x1001, 1:1, umaru55.jpg)


Papa wouldn't be so proud of you anymore. You were his little guitarrista. His little mariachi. And now... just a piece of shit like me!

9db59e  No.2152

File: 6c4ee320e197b31⋯.jpg (13.74 KB, 318x159, 2:1, 098.jpg)


>a piece of shit like me

File: 74e5799b16617b1⋯.png (428.97 KB, 1200x780, 20:13, 74e.png)

1d83de  No.2125[Reply]

Umaru has a boyfriend

d09080  No.2129

File: c3e043ab981dc62⋯.jpg (304.52 KB, 1080x1920, 9:16, umaru123.jpg)


Added to USS, tenk.

1d83de  No.2132

File: b00186383b91d2a⋯.jpg (26.47 KB, 441x463, 441:463, cf0.jpg)


>nigger umaru



e7ea9e  No.2134

File: 47fae0620047280⋯.jpg (26.29 KB, 341x403, 11:13, 026a.jpg)

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