First of all, thank you for listening
So my ex broke up with me ages ago, 5 months to be exact, and during Christmas, I was in a depressive rut and she stopped me from wanting to just an hero (I had a surgery done, felt like nothing was going right any more, health was shot, family was fighting over the medical bill, still lonely, and my school was in bad shape because of the surgery).
I helped her with her rebound boyfriend, who physically and emotionally abused her for 3 months, after our relationship, I was there when she was crying. So in a sense her helping me was getting even.
Anyway, some time in January, she dropped by late to see of a mutual friend of ours. We had been drinking prior to her arrival, and she couldn't stay for long. A force of habit had me kiss her (on the forehead) as she left.
She told me the next day that she missed me. I asked her if she wanted to get back together, do things right this time (because both of us messed up). She said she wanted to, but she also wanted us to both be at our best, with our shit together before trying.
Ever since I've been working on myself physically, and working hard at school to compensate for nearly dropping out of most of my classes.
So everything was fine at first. We were talking like when we were together, and I was (am still) getting in the best state I've ever been in my life, physically, emotionally and mentally.
Then she started drifting. Through a little twitter stalking and from noticing her actions around me, she seemed to be looking at other guys. She became colder, even apparently had an outburst against me texting her according to my friends.
Do I drop her like a sack of bricks? All this time I've been there for her emotionally, and even when I confronted her, asking her if she still wants to try, she can't give me a straight answer. I feel lead on, and I'm tired. I'm making all the right changes and working hard every day. I feel like I deserve better, but my stupid fucking hearPost too long. Click here to view the full text.