/adv/ - Advice

I am drunk, so please excuse a messy post.
I'm lonely as shit. I've been talking to this one guy for like two years or something, the only person I've been talking to. But we had a little spat, and turns out he's an idiot, so we stop talking. Felt great for about a day, since that makes sense of why I couldn't figure him out. But now the loneliness is hitting me again, and I've only been functional because I've been drinking for about three days straight. I figure I have a week or so before I start wanting to die again.

I am assburgers, that was the last trail that I thought would lead to people who were somewhat relatable, but it turned out to be superficial. Still all sorts of idiots with autism. So the deal is, it's like everyone else I've met is stupid. Not because I've special or anything, but they make obvious mistakes, don't change when I point them out, or just seem to be living in their own fantasy world. So I can't just find some people to be friendly with, wouldn't help in kinda the same way a doge doesn't help. But if I google "everyone is stupid" the people I find are stupid things themselves, "Blah blah war blah blah pollution and whatever, humans are so terrible". So words fail me, I spent months trying to get though to this one therapist and he just didn't fucking get anything I was saying.

The only meaningful difference I can think of is when I lost my religion, I didn't have alternatives, evolution and shit wasn't thrown in my face, but I just had fallacies, ways my thinking was bad on its own terms. So for a while I'd catch myself making a mistake and think 'that way I felt a minute ago, that's what X fallacy is'. And I kinda developed a feeling for sound thinking. Just an example, when I tried contacting the local atheist group, I put to him a scenario that would make belief in evolution revealed knowledge. Just 'cause I knew evolution would set him off if anything. It did, he totally missed my point. Maybe the biggest thing people would notice is I ask when I think I know what they mean, 'cause I could be wrong even if it makes sense. Some people get annoyed by it. But 's like for me, my thinking is clear and precise. And dealing with anyone else feels like they live in a fuzzy world of lies. And I just want someone who can understand me, and I'm out of ideas, and I'm gonna want to kill myself when the vodka runs out.