I've had a massive worry the past several months. I've lately been feeling like my mind is going somehow, it's hard to explain, everything feels– wrong, I don't feel like myself, everything seems so foreign, like there's a film over everything, if that even makes sense.
It started several months back when I was walking home from the gym, everything around me felt so strange to me, everything seemed so unfamiliar. I knew where I was, I wasn't lost or anything, it just didn't seem right. Then I got home and it didn't even seem like home; as if I walked into some other house, it didn't seem familiar at all. This particular event is very difficult to articulate into words. I felt normal after I got some sleep and didn't think much of it afterwards, but now I'm having days where I feel like this more and more often. New places make me have these episodes so I especially experienced it during my recent camping trip.
I don't know if this has anything to do with what's going on inside of me but I've become increasingly apathetic about everything. I am still able to think rationally and make logical decisions, but even when my dog died last week whom I had for 14 years didn't really effect me yet my family was in tears.
I don't really know what to make of all this. I'm 19 so apparently that makes me ripe for the picking of this particular nut tree.
Is this what my sources tell me is happening to me? God, I hope I'm wrong. What do any of you know about this? Firsthand experience? I don't even have time to see a professional as I work 64 hours a week achieving a workers victory at the Sharpie factory.