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/ausneets/ - Aus NEETs

The bored four Aussie neats
Winner of the 83rd Attention-Hungry Games
/strek/ - Remove Hasperat

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File: 467c4ef53564aac⋯.png (26.99 KB, 657x527, 657:527, gZ38ujB.png)

 No.34000

OLD THREAD >>33242

 No.34002

CHEESY CRUST PENIS

(pepe on my dick)


 No.34003

nigga u cray cray


 No.34004

Off to meet the day, have a good one NEETs. See you this arvo.


 No.34005

>>34004

Have a good day.


 No.34006

>>34004

Have a good one mate. I await your return.


 No.34007

>>33890

Excellent banner. Nice work.


 No.34008

File: fe4aef13c5cd121⋯.png (48.98 KB, 416x366, 208:183, dump coffee.png)


 No.34009

File: 40d676c1368bbdd⋯.png (85.07 KB, 416x366, 208:183, aquire coffee.png)

morning anons


 No.34010

>>34009

Good morning mate.


 No.34011

>>33984

When will the work on the car be done?


 No.34012

>>34010

Did you like my pepers anon? These two always make me laugh, especially with how cheeky he looks scooping up that coffee, its pure gold


 No.34013

>>34011

I will endeavor to organise it today to take place in the next couple of days.

I may persist with public transport for a while. I just calculated it would cost $36.20 for a week. Filling the car up on Saturday morning costs around $60, depending on the price of fuel and what other trips I have made during the week.

This will probably last until I encounter my first crazy person or Adelaide Metro fucks up spectacularly.


 No.34014

>tfw severely depressed


 No.34015

>>34012

I always enjoy Peep and appreciate any Peepers I see. But I cannot say that particular style of Peep is my favourite.


 No.34016

>>34013

What do you do to occupy yourself while on the train/bus?


 No.34017


 No.34018

>>34016

Stare out of the window.


 No.34019

>>34018

Perhaps you could take a book to read.


 No.34020

>tfw severely impressed


 No.34021

>>34020

what impressed you lad?


 No.34022

File: c4cc91afb9ff8f0⋯.png (835.6 KB, 1920x1080, 16:9, out050782.png)

File: 8831c6279a1fa44⋯.png (1.28 MB, 1920x1080, 16:9, out050784.png)

>>33971

>>33977

>>33980

>>33981

>>33985

Good morning to last thread's NEETs. Let me open the door, check what's inside… Ah, it's >>34000.

>>34004

>>34009

And good morning to this thread's NEETs too!


 No.34023

>>34002

that sounds a lot like that pink guy song


 No.34024

and good morning to everyone that're waking up


 No.34025

>>34022

Good morning Karen

>>34024

Good morning.


 No.34026

>>34021

It's a new day, I am trying to keep a positive mindset that something great is going to happen even though it wont otherwise I will end up >tfw depressed


 No.34027

File: 6fd0e384f4e74d5⋯.jpg (154.92 KB, 840x1140, 14:19, karen burger.jpg)

>>34022

Get some more karens instead of just using screenshots


 No.34028

>>34027

There are some rude Karens on google..


 No.34029

>>34019

Perhaps


 No.34030

File: 0874102b35eadb0⋯.png (671.11 KB, 1043x2048, 1043:2048, karen2.png)

>>34028

there are search engines solely for SFW anime art pics.


 No.34031

>>34014

I have been an absolute wreck the last few nights after 8PM-9PM, always feel very refreshed in the morning though. Seems like a lot of you feel awful when you wake up, I have the opposite problem and get really emotional and moody right before I go to bed interestingly enough.

I think this is how my body tells me I'm a morning person, although I still don't listen.


 No.34032

I am still interested on any update on that mouse, how is he going?


 No.34033

>>34027

I will use screenshots until I run out of episodes.


 No.34034

>>34028

those are the best ones


 No.34035

>>34034

She's obviously not a good girl.


 No.34036

File: 4e42c9658a47286⋯.jpg (101.09 KB, 600x581, 600:581, That Feel When.jpg)

I do not feel very productive today


 No.34037

I jut did another session in the garden. I thought I was finished last week but I decided to lop a few branches off one more tree. It wasn't strictly my tree - it is right against the road on public property - but it was unsightly and no-one else was ever going to do it.

My handyman is coming tomorrow to remove my pile of green waste and to possum-proof my shed.


 No.34038

File: d08b8246fded2bc⋯.png (Spoiler Image, 512.77 KB, 2344x1291, 2344:1291, hmm.png)

It's obvious what you're after my man


 No.34039

>>34038

>googling gumtree


 No.34040

>got a call friday last week for a job I applied to

>pretended to be busy

>asked if they can call back next week monday (today) so that I can prepare more

tfw the call may never come


 No.34041

>>34038

#justboomerthings


 No.34042

>>34038

>>34039

>tfw dad just googled gumtree


 No.34043

>>34042

Is your dad living in Adelaide?


 No.34044

>>34043

asioNEET pls


 No.34045

>>34043

no, Garden City


 No.34046

>>34045

ImpersonatorNEET fuck off


 No.34047

>>34040

Probably should have tried to talk then mate. They wouldn't have grilled you on the phone.


 No.34048

>>34046

I assumed it was an obvious enough joke to not count


 No.34049

>>34040

>tfw the call may never come

Why didn't you just answer it? They were probably going to ask if you wanted to come in for an interview?


 No.34050

>>34048

I appreciate the joke, fuckoff rescinded


 No.34051

File: 4ede9d4aaf5c0ec⋯.jpg (8.06 KB, 250x167, 250:167, 47863426.jpg)

>>34048

tbh Garden City sounds like prime territory for pajeets


 No.34052

>>34047

>>34049

I don't know. I had several instances where during the phone screening where they asked something like

>why do you want to work for us?

>can you provide us details about our firm's current projects that you're interested in

After several phone screens with that, I became more paranoid. Would it be a good idea if I call back around afternoon if I don't receive a call by noon?


 No.34053

>>34052

Those questions should be part of your background information you have gathered about the company before you apply.


 No.34054

>>34052

>>why do you want to work for us?

The answer to this one will almost always be the same: "Those cunts at cenno are gonna cut me off and I need money".


 No.34055

>>34053

I understand if it is actual in-person interview but that seems tad unreasonable for first phone screening no?

Especially since I'm also applying for other jobs at the same time and most likely they call maybe around 3-5 days after I applied. I would have forgotten details already apart from the bare minimum I put on my spreadsheet (date applied, role, firm)


 No.34056

>>34051

I don't think pajeet could spell models


 No.34057

>>34052

Naturally I'm a pretty good bullshitter but I absolutely hate it too. Phone interviews are fine but they have to let you know in advance, I hate being in the middle of something in the kitchen or backyard and then having to drop everything and bullshit with some roastie completely caught off-guard with no preparation when I likely applied a good 2 weeks ago.


 No.34058

>>34056

more like to search for "bobbs and vageni"


 No.34059

>>34058

I wonder if google stalking job neet sees a lot of that


 No.34060

File: 235a7258994a4df⋯.png (391.94 KB, 800x450, 16:9, ClipboardImage.png)


 No.34061

File: f272870a5465ab2⋯.png (292.72 KB, 570x767, 570:767, ClipboardImage.png)


 No.34062

>>34059

I had loads of searches for Indian movies and shit like that and also occasionally untranslated pajeetspeak but most of the time nah, not really.


 No.34063

File: df9f61109cba039⋯.png (244.48 KB, 680x510, 4:3, ClipboardImage.png)


 No.34064

>>34054

Sometimes, depends on the job.

>>34055

I am applying for public sector jobs and I need to address a criteria that I submit with my application. It is expected that you research the place and drop hints in the application about details you picked up. It does suck that is can be out of the blue but there is expectation that employees are ready for everything.

I think it is a good practice that any job you really want, should involve you scouring their website, news feed and social media for what is going in that place. Then why you do you want to work there you can ramble on about how you like their office set-up, their collaborative working environment and focus on health through standing desks. Showing you have an interest for the company and what they do beyond earning the bux.

>>34056

Spell checker in most browsers are miracle workers for them


 No.34065

fuck ive been at work for two hours and want to die


 No.34066

File: e21abdc74cda1ef⋯.jpg (312.09 KB, 1059x962, 1059:962, 1507862163626.jpg)

>>34065

>want to die

I have some of those feels today


 No.34067

Spent all morning cleaning up vomit. Managed upchuck right through my entire wardrobe (like a shelf with some rags on it). Only way to improve that would be if I did it on the computer.

Bit shaky but no hangover.


 No.34068

File: 946e272f4c1dea1⋯.png (Spoiler Image, 530.52 KB, 2377x1291, 2377:1291, doggo.png)

I like doggos too but not in this way


 No.34069

>>34068

>fecebook

Where's a brainlet wojak when you need one.


 No.34070

File: da3a10959812f15⋯.png (94.46 KB, 505x330, 101:66, e98ce8fbf851975e5a4bb058a3….png)

>>34067

>Bit shaky but no hangover.


 No.34071

>>34065

I'll have been at work 5 hours at 11:30.

>>34067

You need a dedicated bucket next to your bed/battlestation.


 No.34072

>>34067

Why do you keep doing this to yourself?


 No.34073

>>34068

>sydney new year 2018 live feed

Are these old searches or is that guy a brainlet?


 No.34074

File: f08d8040ff2220f⋯.gif (2.27 MB, 619x545, 619:545, a33d91a9589778675f92837496….gif)

>>34072

It's just the goon tax


 No.34075

>>34074

10 bucks from your wallet, 10 percent from your self respect


 No.34076

File: 1e8e951f039b5b3⋯.png (26.02 KB, 615x614, 615:614, 1e8e951f039b5b357539afddef….png)

>>34075

50% increase in confidence, 15% chance of a messy morning clean up


 No.34077

>>34072

He's obviously not doing it enough. If he was, the vomiting and hangovers would have stopped by now.


 No.34078

>>34077

Maybe he's slowly increasing his intake like a brainlet instead of using the more intelligent "start off getting extremely drunk and keep doing it until your tolerance catches up" technique


 No.34079

File: c1e7721f22fbacd⋯.gif (75.79 KB, 600x400, 3:2, c50c0984f06e876f28bbe5a48a….gif)

>>34077

>>34078

All NEETs should purchase a funnel, then they can at least use that rope to tie the sack to it to empty into the funnel.


 No.34080

>>34079

Save money by reusing your fuel funnel


 No.34081

File: 56dfacc7a96dec0⋯.png (623.01 KB, 1008x596, 252:149, Dan and Associates.png)

>>34080

Great minds, think alike.


 No.34082

File: 29df14130be6b55⋯.gif (1.22 MB, 366x333, 122:111, f6377b3721bcaaed246657c30d….gif)

Only way to improve would be if I visit Dan Murphy's today


 No.34083

Any other neets had offers of a refund from their nbn providers?


 No.34084

>>34083

No, doesn't it only apply on 100/40 plans if you are on FTN?

I want to get a refund on my connection, I am TPG and have daily drop outs for months. The engineers at TPG think remote diagnosis will fix the problem. The installation guy from NBN had difficult with the existing line from noise but they think they can fix it. I fucking hate the NBN it's worse than the older system when you could get a technician out much easier.

While posting this I just experienced another one…


 No.34085

>>34084

I'm on (or as on, I guess) the 100/40 FTTN and got offered the refund so yeah I think it is. I had a lot of dropouts when I first connected (also with TPG) but it's relatively stable now so I just downgraded to the 50/20 plan.

It looks like they've really been dicked over misadvertising speeds to it wouldn't surprise me if the unstable connections will be raised as the big concern next.


 No.34086

>>34085

Just realized there is a message on the website anyway

>Did you purchase a TPG NBN plan on or after 1 September 2015? You may be entitled to a partial refund or be able to exit your contract without cost. TPG is providing remedies to consumers who purchased NBN Internet plans where their fibre to the node (FTTN) or fibre to the building (FTTB) connection was not capable of delivering the speeds promised.


 No.34087

What is it with wagies shitting at work? I walk in to take a piss and practically vomit the moment I open the interior door. 3 cunts in a row all taking the loudest shits and farts possible.


 No.34088

>>34087

When you've gotta go you've gotta go.


 No.34089

>>34085

Lucky I am on HFC and I hear static on the home phone when I pick it up. They have somehow filter out most of the static when talking on the line but you still hear it at the end when someone stops talking. There is something wrong with the equipment and if these engineers cannot solve I am taking my complaint to my a government organisation. They ring me up and tell me they did some change that fixed because the internet is now stable. So, they close the ticket and repeat the cycle that they want me to go through the diagnostic shit again.

>>34087

They are getting paid for it and they see that as a benefit.


 No.34090

>>34089

I remember reading about cases like that on whirlpool. It's a joke tbh


 No.34091

>>34087

I never get the chance to shit at work. Not that I ever need to, how fucked does your diet have to be that you can't just shit in the morning before work or at night?


 No.34092

>>34091

Good point, it's probably all the hipster cafe food filtering through their bodies.


 No.34093

>>34087

Hahahha

They are so fucking gross. I find it funny rn but its fucking gross irl. They are absolutely fucking gross and the worst part is the fucking sounds like cunts think they not there if they cant see them. The fucking farts, and groans ans heavy breath is fucking awful.

I avoid the toilet between 11.30 and 3.30. Fuck that. I only shit in the disable toilet 2 floors down or the one 3 floors undergroudn


 No.34094

a new round of recruiter cocktease

>tuesday last week: for a permanent, full-time contact centre role

>wednesday: not enough experience so lose out to others; offered a shittier temp admin job at a hospital

>friday: lmao position has been filled; there's another shitty temp admin job at a different division of the hospital

>now: lmao that position has also been filled; never fear, there's a temp position at a bank we will forward your resume to them


 No.34095

File: 189b04c1605d45f⋯.png (4.49 KB, 190x266, 5:7, 500643131cc6ab8af7c5f99bdf….png)

>>34093

> I only shit in the disable toilet

me to


 No.34096

Cruisey here. On my lunch break. So far the highlight of the day has been opening the gen. Have had a stomach ache all day and I feel like I need a fart. Had a bit of a panic attack a few hours ago and went and hid in the toilet. Now I'm hiding in my car.

Phone posting is shit.


 No.34097

>>34091

Exactly. I'm executive-sized and have a poor diet, but I still manage to go like clockwork at home.


 No.34098

>>34096

>Had a bit of a panic attack a few hours ago and went and hid in the toilet. Now I'm hiding in my car.

what happened m8?


 No.34099

>>34096

Sounds like a wild ride

Hope the afternoon is better for you mate


 No.34100

>>34091

>>34092

It's the ridiculous amount of coffee they drink that JUSTs them


 No.34101

>>34093

> I only shit in the disable toilet

The women here have taken over the spastic toilet as their own for some reason. Really upsets that one spastic in an electric chair that comes in from time to time.


 No.34102

>>34096

Stick at it mate. The bad feelings will pass.


 No.34103

>>34098

Nothing really. Just feel trapped in a room with a bunch of people because that's what I am.


 No.34104

>>34090

>whirlpool

Why do most posters there sound like boomer fuckwits. Every time someone asks for advice, some cunt would be hammering in some irrelevant point rather than help the OP

>>34095

>>34094

Their toilets are generally cleaner. They will never know if you're disabled anyway (maybe autism counts as a disability).


 No.34105

>>34099

Yeah me too. Only three hours to go


 No.34106

>>34100

I always stick to one coffee in the morning and maybe one in the afternoon while working

>>34104

Because they either are boomer fuckwits or they were raised and influenced by boomer fuckwits


 No.34107

File: 77a13aa35a88aff⋯.png (9.56 KB, 645x773, 645:773, 77a13aa35a88afff6e36e9d7e0….png)

>>34101

>Really upsets that one spastic in an electric chair

You are so thoughtful towards it


 No.34108

>>34104

>Why do most posters there sound like boomer fuckwits

because they literally are a bunch of senile boomers and bitter gen x guys, I'd say the gen x guys that bitch and moan in the jobs and education board are even more intolerable than the boomers that are in all the lifestyle and hobby sub-forums.

Disgusting people honestly, Whirlpool gives new insight into how the upper class of society is just as awful to be around in their own way.


 No.34109

>>34102

Cheers mate.

Glad I opened the gen.

Thanks for improving my spirits NEETs.


 No.34110

>>34107

I wish I was in an electric chair tbh


 No.34111

>>34109

I can improve everyone's spirits except my own.

The kind NEET's curse.


 No.34112

File: db36212aed32a33⋯.jpg (40.09 KB, 570x487, 570:487, 7f001b60e6126b194f1cca3dbd….jpg)

>>34108

>Disgusting people honestly,


 No.34113

File: 0c037140c44b80b⋯.png (35.82 KB, 629x504, 629:504, 1514534977437.png)

>>34110

I believe in you, you can cripple yourself enough to make that dream come true


 No.34114

>>34113

I suspect he was referring to the execution device..


 No.34115

File: f2906acbeccd2ea⋯.jpg (84.65 KB, 645x729, 215:243, 1514535933338.jpg)

>>34114

don't we all sometimes


 No.34116

>>34114

I was but if you can do fully sick drifts in the cripplechair I'll take that too


 No.34117

Karma will get you NEETs who mock the crippled.


 No.34118

>>34117

>tfw you karma yourself into dspbux


 No.34119

File: db3efa3d1f770e0⋯.jpg (4.39 KB, 227x250, 227:250, 1514532810010.jpg)

>>34117

I hope Karma gives me a hug


 No.34120

>>34116

It's got these all-terrain wheels on it, but he just sedately buzzes about the place. Probably never been off road on it, like every other 4x4 owner.


 No.34121

>>34120

Cripplechairs are wasted on the crippled


 No.34122

>>34120

>like every other 4x4 owner.

They might have driven on gravel once in that outlet shop they went to


 No.34123

File: 249b4aad11ddeae⋯.png (21.59 KB, 485x443, 485:443, 1514534646722.png)

>>34121

>are wasted

I want to get wasted


 No.34124

>>34123

As in murdered?


 No.34125

File: fd4ee69243ab0d1⋯.png (702.34 KB, 634x493, 634:493, ClipboardImage.png)


 No.34126

File: 3de6bf5511121f1⋯.gif (179.02 KB, 253x270, 253:270, 3de6bf5511121f12320fae5b26….gif)


 No.34127


 No.34128

>>34127

I wonder if you can bet on the tardraces


 No.34129

File: d9c188e5c7c94fd⋯.gif (1.89 MB, 500x750, 2:3, d9c188e5c7c94fd0dae3813ff2….gif)

Is my hard drive failing, my gifs seem to getting more fucked over time?


 No.34130

>>34129

Sorry it must be the picture viewer, there was massive distortion on the image when I opened it up


 No.34131

Pepe on my wrist. Pepe on my wrist.


 No.34132


 No.34133

File: a382f6bb702bfdf⋯.png (1.12 MB, 1200x1200, 1:1, 786876.png)


 No.34134

>>34131

tfw about to NEET in the kitchen


 No.34135

>>34134

NEETLIFE!


 No.34136

>>34134

is that a euphemism


 No.34137

BinNEET here. There is no need for a reminder tonight as I am not putting the bin out this week since there is nothing in it.

Thank you all for the good care you take of me.


 No.34138

>>34136

depends if I decide to pass the pepe to mummybot or not


 No.34139

File: 669d97a9908b823⋯.png (232.63 KB, 568x590, 284:295, 669d97a9908b823ae90ba4d61e….png)

>tfw depressed mess

I don't know what it is today, I've even neglected my daily NEETwalk.


 No.34140

>>34139

What about your daily wank/goon?


 No.34141

>>34139

Don't worry m8, seems to be a lot of us including myself that have been not in the best mood the last few days, it's not just you


 No.34142

>>34137

You're welcome, good to hear your bin situation is under control


 No.34143

>>34140

Neglected both of those too, all I've done is get up to make some coffee, some toast a pee and poo, all day has been spent lying in bed.


 No.34144

>>34143

Just take it easy today and do some "self-care" that all the millennial girls do, tomorrow is another day.

Just don't do anything reckless that you'll regret later, I always do shit like that when I'm tfw depressed and sabotage myself down the track.


 No.34145

File: 60a17ac6d95d6ed⋯.jpg (752.23 KB, 1162x775, 1162:775, efdfef46c2351c21c3e360236a….jpg)

>>34143

>Neglected both of those too

Is there sometime for lunch/dinner/snack you can get to cheer yourself? I am skele but food does improve my mood quite a bit.


 No.34146

>>34144

>Just don't do anything reckless that you'll regret later

I'd never kill myself, no matter how bad things are, I'll force myself to go for a walk tomorrow.

>>34145

I had a few pieces of toast with extra butter and some vegemite, seems to have cheered me up at bit, might make another coffee with some extra sugar and milk.


 No.34147

>>34146

>I'd never kill myself, no matter how bad things are

good man, you better not - I've got another NEET track for you to enjoy later on m8


 No.34148

Holy fuck, I have been submitted my résumé as my curriculum vitae

>tfw deliriously perplexed


 No.34149

>>34148

I thought they were treated interchangeably here in Australia? I never treated them differently and still got work.


 No.34150

>>34149

https://ipoint.uwa.edu.au/app/answers/detail/a_id/2461/~/difference-between-a-resume-and-cv

"In Australia, resume and CV are used interchangeably. CVs are usually longer and list your full work history. Resumes are shorter in length and summarise your experience. In other countries resumes and CV are different. When applying for work overseas check what is meant by a resume or CV in that country. "


 No.34151

>>34149

>I never treated them differently and still got work.

My resume at the moment is only a page long with my references. Not as much a CV.


 No.34152

Do you cunts ger depressed for no reason? I was going to ask her on a date today and instead I didnt even say hi because I was having one of those internal 'kill yourself cunt you dont even deserve to breathe' moments


 No.34153


 No.34154

File: 0da721e4cb579c6⋯.png (17.31 KB, 402x366, 67:61, 0da721e4cb579c653676d46bc8….png)

>>34152

>'kill yourself cunt you dont even deserve to breathe'

You need a brainlet wojack in your mind telling you doin good and every think be ok


 No.34155

>>34152

Something usually triggers my depression but sometimes I can't work out what it was and that feels like there is no reason. But there will have been one.


 No.34156

>>34152

She wouldn't have noticed you ignored her or anything today?


 No.34157

>>34151

Basically you'll want something that is like four sections:

Personal deets

Work history (most recent through least)

Skillset

Referees

It is also acceptable to state that you'll furnish a list of referees and written references at interview.


 No.34158

>>33890

Not bad, though I'd remove the MAX logo as it obscures what is a great shot of the doggo.

>>33955

>how about that sink rat, huh? didn't think i'd visit this board and be greeted by such a story today

It was a great and unexpected end to what was a boring week.


 No.34159

>>34146

Yeah mate walks are good for you


 No.34160

>>34084

My parents NBN in the suburbs is completely fucked. Drops out every ten mins. I'm in the city and it's rock solid 100/40 full line rate the whole time.


 No.34161

File: 69054ef824c1a6a⋯.png (19.83 KB, 296x249, 296:249, peppers_is_jacked_up_on_ka….png)

>>34012

So you made them? I think they're great, especially this one.


 No.34162

>>34026

That's a good idea, how's it working?


 No.34163

>>34153

Sorry to hear that mateoid. Feeling better yet?

>>34154

Lol do you remember when we used to talk about gassing the mental jew

>>34155

Dunno m80, I dont want to go searching for the reason I feelbad tho

>>34156

I pretended not to see her, she didnt come over to me aaaaaaaaaaah rejected again


 No.34164

File: 3ab7521fa218641⋯.jpg (63 KB, 700x714, 50:51, 3ab7521fa218641c7ca89d62b8….jpg)

>>34163

>I pretended not to see her


 No.34165

>>34163

>I pretended not to see her, she didnt come over to me aaaaaaaaaaah rejected again

Ignoring sheilas can actually work in your favour. The trick is not being retarded about it.


 No.34166

>>34163

>>34164

>>34164

Great fuckin image reacting

Neet you goofed.

If you saw her, she saw you. She knew that you pretended not to see her. I hope you know that she knows.


 No.34167

File: f50ded4104df393⋯.jpg (100.04 KB, 580x396, 145:99, Battletank wheelchair.jpg)

>>34037

He'd better come. His constant no-shows are stressing me out too.

>>34064

>Showing you have an interest for the company and what they do beyond earning the bux

Remember this you doll bludgeoning cunts

>>34125


 No.34168

>>34166

Why the fuck didnt she come over then


 No.34169

>>34168

Don't panic. This is easily recoverable.

Tomorrow morning just walk up behind her, slap her arse, and say "g'day love!".


 No.34170

Hey dad, what's been happening?


 No.34171

>>34170

Not much son, how was soccer?


 No.34172

>>34170

You're not my Dad! What are you doing in my Mom's bed?


 No.34173

>>34171

It was great. Mr Thompson gave me an Up and Go for giving him a blowjob!


 No.34174

>>34172

I'm the only one cooking, get out of my kitchen!!!


 No.34175

>>34173

Good work son, if you give me a reach around I'll let you have a drumstick for din dins.


 No.34176

>>34174

Can you shut your filthy, diseased ridden, dick trap of a mouth you worthless STD ridden cunt.


 No.34177

My parents divorced after I cooked the family cat for dinner.


 No.34178

>>34177

One day my family will get back together and I will be happy boy again, happy boy!


 No.34179

>>34167

>doll bludgeoning

Nice autocorrect, NEET.


 No.34180

File: 4aa9e6c43d721b8⋯.png (5.01 KB, 255x253, 255:253, 4aa9e6c43d721b884ffd83fd94….png)


 No.34181

>>34179

we're all blunt instruments here


 No.34182

>>34157

>It is also acceptable

Thank you for this advice.

>>34160

I am a shire NEET with TPG and the people working there are not very good in understanding the problem. We had the electrical cables replaces a few years because they were arching in the rain to the HCF cable. The people at TPG don't understand how the cable is completely fucked from this damage and we even got a letter from NBN wanting to inspect our property i am guessing neighbors are experiencing the same issue/flow on effects

>>34161

I agree they are great that they capture that instability we all experience.

>>34181

Two True


 No.34183

File: 4dcb2313de979f2⋯.png (34.52 KB, 408x450, 68:75, 4dcb2313de979f2d4c8cafcf4d….png)

>>34182

>shire


 No.34184

File: 54a16b87b269f5d⋯.png (367.54 KB, 800x820, 40:41, b93.png)


 No.34185

>>34184

Hey cool cat.


 No.34186

File: 2917cb40cf74c68⋯.png (122.19 KB, 918x748, 27:22, 1300 723 388.png)

>>34185

You scare me


 No.34187

File: 14bccd631239b3e⋯.jpg (10.25 KB, 276x265, 276:265, Blank _7969859890dd7d0bec3….jpg)

>>34186

Not much.


 No.34188

>>34186

It's Mrs Dan!


 No.34189

>>34188

You're one crazy bitch.


 No.34190

File: 350e1580cc990ba⋯.png (152.54 KB, 503x503, 1:1, hello boys.png)

>>34188

Counter point: is it Dan?

I just found it very exploitable and it needed to be on it's own. I was browsing a forbidden place and it appeared


 No.34191

>>34190

Spoiler fairy can you please, spoiler it may scare some NEETs?


 No.34192

File: dc909240d136e7c⋯.jpg (74.3 KB, 403x310, 13:10, 1208749562285.jpg)

>>34187

I will not be out done


 No.34193

>>34129

Bitrot is a real thing, look it up.

Also has wojack meme gone too far?


 No.34194

>>34193

Wojak never went far enough. He shouldve been what pepe became


 No.34195

>>34190

Good to see John has found his calling


 No.34196

>>34193

Thanks, I know of it.

>Also has wojack meme gone too far?

NEVER!

>>34195

kek


 No.34197

>>34194

Its happening m8, retard wojack is to wojack as apu is to pepe.


 No.34198

>>34197

Is apu the weird little crowdsourced pepe? I remeber the origin of that thing, it was originally from r9k draw-a-pepe-from-memory thread


 No.34199

>>34197

apu is my favorite pepe variant since the feels bad man series. I'm not a fan of the brainlet wojaks, although they are at least better than the soyboy wojaks and the pink wojak series.

Wojak is, at its core, a very simple meme. Sometimes he may be happier or hiding his feelings, but beneath it all he's always gonna be tfw depressed.


 No.34200

File: 9664eee8c0cdfdb⋯.jpg (209.42 KB, 1480x1143, 1480:1143, 1491843294032.jpg)

>>34199

>he's always gonna be tfw depressed.


 No.34201

>>34199

yeah pink wojack and nujack are the worst, so retard wojack is basically tfw depressed and retarded. No pink pepes yet (good).


 No.34202

>>34198

Yeah pretty much, didn't see that thread though. I remember the thread where pol invented kek though, crazy times.


 No.34203

>>34202

isn't kek just a natural evolution of lel? I remember /sp/ being full of lel memes about five years ago


 No.34204

>>34203

"Kek" is just what happens when you run "lol" through the Horde filter while playing WoW. It's been around since 2004.


 No.34205

>>34203

Yeah, but im talking about a different meme. You know the one with the frog god of checking digits, autists going around like "priase kek".


 No.34206

File: 6fdd2cd4fcf88a7⋯.gif (394.02 KB, 305x185, 61:37, fark_1pzOICj_CWslBtaN7uPZH….gif)


 No.34207

>>34204

The evolution is more complex than I expected


 No.34208

YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.

This song takes me back to my younger days.


 No.34209

>>34208

We should send this to monkneet


 No.34210

>>34209

I wonder what he's up to.


 No.34211

>>34210

Probably still out there catching dick diseases


 No.34212

>>34211

And spreading them.


 No.34213

>>34210

Balls deep in syphilis


 No.34214

Perth neets

Is Dan's open today?


 No.34215

>>34214

Every day of the weeks he's open, isn't he?


 No.34216

>>34214

I'd say so, the only holidays he's possibly closed on would be good friday, christmas and maybe anzac day. Nobody even really knows what this holiday is for, it's basically just a second sunday conveniently placed at a time when wagies can get away and enjoy the last rays of summer.


 No.34217

>>34216

We have one here in SA next Monday. they legit call it "The March Public Holiday".


 No.34218

>>34208

When I opened this into a new tab all I saw was Dan and so thought it had something to do with Mr Murphy.


 No.34219

File: afd5cb9f1f4a8f7⋯.jpg (35.44 KB, 1023x576, 341:192, afd5cb9f1f4a8f7ee181316ceb….jpg)

>>34218

>When I opened this into a new tab all I saw was Dan

All me!


 No.34220

>>34216

It's Labour Day in WA today.

>>34214

Just checked the website for Joondalup and it's saying they're open 'till 7pm. https://www.danmurphys.com.au/Stores/WA-JOONDALUP-4161.jsp;jsessionid=ADFE6B35493630B260E013BA14F8CE07.ncdlmorasp1301?bmUID=m74h46T


 No.34221

YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.

One man built his reputation on a handshake.

He made a promise that no matter who you were, or what you'd like to drink, he'd have the drink at the lowest price.

That was Dan Murphy's promise and it always will be.


 No.34222

Taking my shit in the disabled toilet.

Todays waging wasnt so bad, only another 50 years left!


 No.34223

File: 5d1b58e6180012f⋯.jpg (44.73 KB, 570x487, 570:487, 7f001b60e6126b194f1cca3dbd….jpg)

>>34222

>Taking my shit in the disabled toilet.

Good job

>only another 50 years left!

You'll get there.


 No.34224

>>34222

>>34223

What's after that for us to look forward to?


 No.34225

>>34224

Having to use a disabled toilet for real.


 No.34226

File: 9af44aa0e188965⋯.png (134.42 KB, 648x628, 162:157, 9af44aa0e188965ae576c2dacc….png)

>>34225

Touché


 No.34227

File: 9d8dd6d8ecd3b19⋯.jpg (34.09 KB, 500x500, 1:1, planters-peanuts.jpg)

Need some recommendations for pee bottles. Been using bottles from peanuts but I fear my roommate might enter my room and see it and get grossed out.


 No.34228

>>34227

>pee bottles.

*piss bottles

I recommend juice bottles. You could tell him you have passion for apple juice.


 No.34229

>>34224

Owning a house.


 No.34230

File: 720186fa6bd1a7b⋯.png (41.91 KB, 240x232, 30:29, dum dum.png)

>>34228

Sorry. I'm a new neet. Are there any brands that offers non-transparent bottles?


 No.34231

>>34227

I use cheap-ass 75 cent soda bottles. There's opaque bottles out there.


 No.34232

>>34231

Don't you find the mouth is too narrow to fit your dick in?


 No.34233

>>34232

Well you don't need to fit your dick in. Unless your urethra is so gigantic that its power cannot be contained, it's fairly easy to line em up and shoot.


 No.34234

>>34232

That's why I use the peanut bottles, there very comfortable to use at night while you are semi awake.


 No.34235

>>34233

I require full insertion for peace of mind.


 No.34236

File: 2c565e939bdc272⋯.png (15.53 KB, 350x420, 5:6, images (6).png)

>>34234

Booka doo slim flam shabadoo


 No.34237

>>34235

Take that quote out of context.


 No.34238

File: 300a4a65afe5b8c⋯.png (68.74 KB, 645x729, 215:243, 1514536023613.png)

>>34236

yes, yes


 No.34239

File: 44c103a536aca33⋯.jpeg (15.65 KB, 361x408, 361:408, images (60).jpeg)

>>34236

>>34238

Big rock is better than small rock!


 No.34240

File: 2f4040377232647⋯.png (28.16 KB, 488x463, 488:463, 1514505215611.png)

>>34239

smarty


 No.34241

File: d7b7dada2a9bac2⋯.png (161.81 KB, 480x480, 1:1, ClipboardImage.png)

I postulate there is little better than left-over slow-cooked roast beef and gravy on a lightly toasted roll for dinner.


 No.34242

>>34241

What about a gf?


 No.34243

File: c65a7fe3d2e6112⋯.jpg (182.77 KB, 1190x1114, 595:557, c65a7fe3d2e61125e95cdda4e6….jpg)

File: 72941022a10d2cf⋯.png (233.35 KB, 808x805, 808:805, 1513928176668.png)

File: 08409dba43b1cf5⋯.png (150.46 KB, 277x385, 277:385, 1513924013926.png)

File: 8a00fbaa6232572⋯.png (442.02 KB, 808x805, 808:805, 1513927333590.png)

File: 31e55abb714fa66⋯.png (1.97 MB, 1000x1000, 1:1, 1513925652376.png)


 No.34244

>>34241

Nothing to turn your nose up at Pepe.


 No.34245

>>34242

You'd have to have cooked them the day before. Long Pork probably pairs better with a coleslaw or bbq sauce than gravy.


 No.34246

>>34230

That NZ lemon drink called L&P comes in a brown bottle.


 No.34248

File: e62293ec3ccd8af⋯.jpg (75.69 KB, 1300x1300, 1:1, listerine.jpg)

I figured it out. I'll be ordering this mouthwash and trying out the bottle as my new "piss bottle". Since both my laundry basket and trash bin are white, it'll fit with the aesthetic and won't look too out of place. Does someone have experience using mouthwash piss bottles?


 No.34249

>>34248

Hopefully they come with the child safety cap to stop your piss from emptying out if they tip over


 No.34250

File: 707ab4afb262f38⋯.png (Spoiler Image, 46.07 KB, 1258x890, 629:445, 9dc1b438600c5b7037ef74b2f4….png)

>>34247

Hello


 No.34251

>tfw depressed


 No.34252

>tfw impressed


 No.34253

>tfw undressed


 No.34254

>tfw suppressed


 No.34255

>>34248

Sounds like a great way to end up with a numb dick


 No.34256

>Tfw big smelly aboriginal dick in your mouth


 No.34257

>>34255

At least it will be clean


 No.34258

>>34256

UNNA!


 No.34259

I am going to take the car out for a drive this evening I think. It has been eleven days since I have driven it.


 No.34260

>>34259

>I am going to take the car out for a drive this evening I think.

For a food binge?


 No.34261

>>34259

Are you a learner or just don't get out much?


 No.34262

>>34261

I just don't get out much. I am scared of driving.


 No.34263

>>34260

I am not going anywhere, not buying anything. Just driving around.


 No.34264

>>34260

I'm so fat I have to be driven in the back of a work van to get to kfc


 No.34265

>>34264

At least your able to visit Colonel Sanders. What is your big big boi meal of choice?


 No.34266

>260 posts

good work. I want to do comfy catch up but i have homework and I better do that before the gen.

Still have a stomach ache, it's sort of in my sternum region, it's been sore all day.


 No.34267

>>34266

>it's been sore all day.

Have a wank


 No.34268

>>34265

I get about 3 mega feasts for lunch then get Domino's delivered for dinner, they have to send a few drivers for all the pizza I order


 No.34269

>>34262

Can't blame you to be honest. Driving is a pain enough in my small city, I'd hate to live in a big city and have to drive everywhere


 No.34270

>>34268

Have a Metamucil


 No.34271

>>34266

Sternum? Sounds like your heart needs to take a gigantic fucking shit.


 No.34272

>>34271

Maybe it's not that. I dont know what it's called. It's in that spot where if you get punched you get winded, inbetween the two sides of the ribcage right at the top of the stomach.


 No.34273

File: d3f018169bb1e13⋯.webm (1.21 MB, 1280x720, 16:9, VID_20180304_003420.webm)

This is a something I filmed when I was at that show the other week and all the normies came in once the show finished


 No.34274

>>34273

Your mate in the monster cap?


 No.34275

Got the car booked in for next Tuesday to get the water pump replaced. When I gave my surname the bloke asked if I knew [first name]. Turned out he knew my late father.


 No.34276

>>34273

Is that you?


 No.34277

>>34275

>tfw no dad


 No.34278

>>34277

I'll be your daddy


 No.34279

>>34276

No that was my mate I went with

>>34274

NAh


 No.34280

File: 67acc3ae9bf4185⋯.gif (517.11 KB, 320x180, 16:9, V_x5Kv.gif)

She said yes


 No.34281

>>34279

Have you told him about the neet gen side of your life?


 No.34282

>>34280

She's letting you put your computer in your room?


 No.34283

>>34272

That's the solar plexus.

You sure it's not just heartburn?


 No.34284

File: a22e799c05b5823⋯.png (94.16 KB, 634x697, 634:697, a22.png)

I'm pretty sure she knows I intended to ask her out on a date, too. She said "yeah I'd love to, that sounds like fun" and smiled a lot.


 No.34285

>>34284

Well done NEET. Now don't mess it up.


 No.34286

>>34266

It is nice to have you back. Good boy for doing your homework first.


 No.34287

>>34284

make sure you remember us when you're balls deep


 No.34288

>>33998

Then you miss the Omeo Highway which is a solid 10 out of fucking 10


 No.34290

Fun fact I learned today and am not bullshitting and you probably will be able to verify from google maps but The ACT Greens Building is Located in the exact same building as something called AIDS Action


 No.34291

>>34284

oh shit how did you do that


 No.34292

I am back from my drive. I encountered a couple of bad drivers but nothing I couldn't handle. I didn't get too stressed, but I didn't enjoy it either.


 No.34293

>>34292

Driving on a weekday in between 7am to 8pm is the fucking worst


 No.34294

>>34281

No, no one must know my secret…


 No.34295

>>34292

>I didn't get too stressed, but I didn't enjoy it either.

Well that must count as a success.


 No.34296

File: d3ffb63e7c1cbda⋯.png (423.22 KB, 645x645, 1:1, jThLmOb.png)

>>34285

I can't mess anything up, I've already qualified for GF2018. Anything beyond this is a bonus round.

>>34287

I wouldn't have asked if not for the encouragement of one NEET in this thread.

>>34291

I bee'd myself


 No.34297

>>34295

I suppose.


 No.34298

>>34296

Well done, hearing your success has lifted my mood.


 No.34299

>>34220

Why is it this day, and not next week, I mean Vic and Canberra has Labour Day on that week Or Canberra has some other holiday that might as well be Labour day, They as of this year have a Reconcilliation public holiday which I guess if we have any Canberra NEETs they'll spend it drinking goon and sniffing petrol to pay homage to the original landowners


 No.34300

>>34296

If you win GF2018 then we all win GF2018 by association

Don't mess this up neeto


 No.34301

>>34296

That doesn't help me answer the question on how people get gfs


 No.34302

This neets success has made me depressed. If only I had an ounce of the courage he has.


 No.34303

>>34284

Onya, mate. Makes my heart glad.


 No.34304

>>34299

Judging by a quick google it varies by state. Victoria and Tasmania used to have it on the first Monday of March but shifted it for some reason after WW2. WA didn't establish theirs until 1948.

I can't find much on the exact reason for these dates, but I'd assume it has correlates with the introduction of some work based laws.


 No.34305

>>34296

>I wouldn't have asked if not for the encouragement of one NEET in this thread.

Which post???


 No.34306

>>34296

>I bee'd myself

We encouraged you and that is the best answer you give?

>tfw not impressed


 No.34307

>>34304

Ok

Now the real question remains, are the NEETs here going to celebrate Reconcilliation Day the only right way to do it


 No.34308

>>34304

Looks like WA started celebrating their date after the 40 hour work week was established, while the other states started when the 8 hour work day was established


 No.34309

>>34302

If it makes you feel any better I a different anon am going through a personal depression and self crisis as well as developing lock jaw out of nowhere


 No.34310

>>34307

I'm not celebrating a day I don't get off


 No.34311

>>34309

Good thing you don't have a boyfriend..


 No.34312

>>34311

He might be the neet that wishes he has a boyfriend


 No.34313

>>34311

well of course I'm not a fucking faggot


 No.34314

>>34312

fuck off tbh


 No.34315

>>34313

I was making light of the lock jaw, m80. Don't get upset.


 No.34316

>>34314

There was a neet here yesterday that was lamenting about how his art friend wouldn't fuck him


 No.34317

YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.

choon


 No.34318

goon


 No.34319

>>34315

>>34316

Mate I get touchy about this shit, it's fine you don't know probably but when I was 5 I was raped


 No.34320


 No.34321

>>34317

we /bleep/ now


 No.34322

>>34319

I am sorry to hear that. Sorry if I have triggered some bad memories.


 No.34323

>>34319

How can anyone not know? You mention it every five minutes.


 No.34324

>>34319

Fair enough. I didn't mean it in an offensive way, I just thought you could have been him.


 No.34325

>>34323

It would also help if he mentioned it or used a tripcode or something, instead of getting upset at standard and expected banter.


 No.34326

>>34323

bit rude tbh


 No.34327

>>34324

just shut the fuck up already


 No.34328

>>34299

>original landowners

The British monarchy!

God save the Queen!


 No.34329

>>34320

He'll be proud of you


 No.34330

>>34325

He just does it because he like the attention. He is passive aggressive.


 No.34331

>>34301

Cut your hair, hit the gym, maintain good hygiene, spend a ton of time doing online dating (sending messages), go on dates IRL, receive gf.


 No.34332

>>34303

>>34298

Me too lads, me too. I haven't felt this happy and anxious in a long time.

>>34300

I think the association rule was discontinued in the 2014 season after it was discovered that Chads were abusing their ranking to sell GF status to permavirgins on gumtree

>>34305

This post (>>34166) made me feel like I was being pathetic. Maybe more than that, everyone here has been encouraging me for ages to be direct and stop behaving like I'm begging to be placed in the friendzone and it all came to a head when I saw her this afternoon. A thought ran through my head -

>when you act like you only want to be her friend then you're being dishonest with yourself and you're being deceitful with her as well; you know very well the only reason you're doing this is to avoid the discomfort of being vulnerable and yet it's a necessary step towards success, so you're avoiding success itself in the goal of being more comfortable. Comfort isn't living, nobody looks back on their deathbed and wishes they'd just spent a bit more time inside their comfort zone. This isn't even a new realization, you've been deliberately avoiding discomfort for a long time. Just fucking do it


 No.34333

>>34332

Just don't mention the holocaust on your date.


 No.34334

>>34330

fuck maybe you're right but all and really you fucks are me only friends and I don't like being called a faggot


 No.34335

>tfw severely depressed


 No.34336


 No.34337

>>34336

Somebody posted in the last thread that he upset the girls he was chatting up when he mentioned the holocaust.


 No.34338

>tfw pissed out my asshole


 No.34339

>>34334

You weren't called anything. You had a bit of banter pushed in your direction is all. understand the difference.


 No.34340

>>34337

I usually mention dans lowest price guarantee and that gets me laid everytime


 No.34341

>>34339

Ah ok, tbh things are going confusing for me right now


 No.34342

>>34338

Did you take a photo for us?


 No.34343

You could argue that without being depressed you can never be happy. We can't escape our emotions but we can use them to our advantage. If you let emotions drive your decisions you will make mistakes you otherwise wouldn't. You might see gf as being a solution it isn't. gf 2018 might be a race but gf is not.


 No.34344

>>34340

Kek

Have a goon


 No.34345

>>34338

Girlneet?


 No.34346

>>34342

Unfortunately not, but if it happens again, and I think it might I shale take a photo.

>>34345

No.


 No.34347

>>34343

Just let him enjoy the prospect of a gf, dude.


 No.34348

>>34343

Yes but the issue for me is that I don't even know what I'm looking for


 No.34349

>>34347

Yeah, I shouldn't give advice as a hermet neet tbh.

>>34348

More advice, instead of looking at possibilities others suggest come up with a different way. You might not see what you want because you're looking the wrong way.


 No.34350

Found this I'd saved in a text document on my hdd about 12 years ago. Somebody might find it useful.

>1. Stand up straight. Shoulders relaxed and back, head facing the world.

>2. Smile more often. It doesn't even have to be a full-out smile. Just think about smiling and learn to smile with your eyes, or as Tyra Banks calls it "smeyes" or however you spell it.

>3. Read up on Starting Strength or Bill Starr's 5x5 and do it.

>4. Every Monday, Wednesday and Friday, go to the gym and do #3.

>5. Every Tuesday and Thursday, and Sunday/Saturday if you want, run a mile. Every week, try to add a bit to that length and/or take a bit off of your time.

>6. Drink bare fucking minimum one half-gallon of water a day. Straight and not mixed with anything. A full gallon is better.

>7. Buy clothes that fit, are in style, and are congruent with your personal style.

>8. Find the Harris-Benedict formula for caloric needs and figure out how many calories you need a day to achieve your desired results.

>9. Take #8 and make sure you're getting about 40% of your daily calories from protein, 30% from carbs and 30% from fat.

>10. Eat as soon as you wake up and every 3 hours after that while staying in line with #8.

>11. Figure out how much sleep you need a night, somewhere between 7-9 hours, it's different for everybody, and get that much sleep, uninterrupted, at least 5 nights a week.

>12. Meditate for at least 30 minutes a day.

>13. Look people in the eyes when you're talking to them.

>14. Adapt a cooperative mindset, instead of combative, competitive or supplicative.

>15. Nurture your social relationships with your friends and family.

>16. Find some hobbies that you're going to like doing and that call to you.

>17. Listen to people.

>18. Listen to yourself and your body.

>19. Teach yourself to be comfortable in increasingly more uncomfortable situations by staying in your stretch zone that I described earlier.

>20. Any time something bad happens, find 3 good things that can come of it.

>21. Look for the lesson in any problem that you have.

>22. Stop complaining and start looking at the bright side of situations.

>23. Be proactive.

>24. Take an hour and write down 100 questions. Look at the themes and then rank and order the 10 that speak the most to you.

>25. Journal everyday, if even for 5 minutes.

>26. Make peace with the person that you are and learn to love that person.

>27. Embrace the moment.

>28. Stop dwelling on the past, specifically past failures.

>29. Stop worrying so much about the future, specifically things that can go wrong.

>30. Buy "I Will Teach You To Be Rich" by Ramit Sethi and follow his advice on how to get your finances completely and totally in order.

>31. Set goals for your life. Be it for the next hour, the next day, week, month, 6 months, year, decade, whatever. Set them, write them down and make action items on how to go about achieving them and do them.


 No.34351

>>34349

The issue is I don't even know where to look in order to help me to know where to look


 No.34352

>>34350

Fuck that, rather go on the goon diet


 No.34353

>>34350

half of these seem to be shilling shit including a an alahu


 No.34355

>>34354

I Don't know how


 No.34356

>>34352

>>34353

Perhaps. I just saw it a few minutes ago when I was looking for something I'd filed away. I'm not forcing it on anybody.


 No.34357

>>34337

He dodged a bullet there, tbh.


 No.34358

>>34350

>learn to smile with your eyes

>smeyes

AKA smiling like someone who isn't a complete sociopath.

AKA regular smiling.


 No.34359

>>34354

It's always a worry when some crabs get uppity


 No.34360

>>34351

You have to look wherever you can, sometimes the journey is more important than the goal. Don't think of it as something you're doing wrong.

Also I would save oven math until atleast 3-4th date tbh.


 No.34361

>>34350

>>34358

There are studies that smiling has a positive impact on the brain to make you happier. Even if it not what you feel they say it helps to uplift you mood


 No.34362

>>34358

That's how you give them a false sense of security before the rape


 No.34363

>>34360

Oh I know to keep politics to myself and that which is another reason having a gf scares me because what if I say Hitler did nothing wrong and she pretends to be cool and next thing I know i get filed with a 18c


 No.34364

>>34363

Is she white?

Only non-whites can file an 18C complaint.


 No.34365

>>34364

She could file a restraining order.


 No.34366

>>34364

I thought a whitey filed one against Bolt


 No.34367

>>34365

Get a gf that can't read


 No.34368

>>34366

That was a "professional aboriginal".


 No.34369

>>34368

so in other words a whitey


 No.34370

Low quality conversation again.


 No.34371

They're making these machines bloody clever. I had a conversation with it before I realised it was a robot.

I'm on my last question now.

Catch up is going to take me all night.


 No.34372

>>34370

Indeed you have contributed to


 No.34373

>>34371

what one was this


 No.34374

>>34371

Cyber sex with it


 No.34375

File: f6acbd1fdec6fdc⋯.png (7.5 KB, 361x408, 361:408, images (5).png)

>>34370

Big poos


 No.34376


 No.34377

File: 6da1c2bc5ffcdf9⋯.jpg (10.56 KB, 409x359, 409:359, 6da1c2bc5ffcdf947d868f947a….jpg)

>>34371

I feel like I hardly see you any more.


 No.34378

File: ccb70746a8013f8⋯.jpg (224.3 KB, 1456x1092, 4:3, puTRjTer.jpg)

>tfw depressed


 No.34379

>>34373

Asking me about the state election, the robot sounded hot.

>>34377

IKTF

bosslady called before saying I have the w/e off so we'll catch up properly. Just like we did in the good old days when we were kids.


 No.34380

>>34379

there is one of those coming up?


 No.34381

>>34378

That doesn't look like Dan Murphy's.


 No.34382

File: c64a17cf928f8b2⋯.png (10.91 KB, 321x339, 107:113, 0FnuQL3.png)

Hey guys, I'm having to reschedule the date from Thursday to Friday because of family stuff and as I was about to send the text I realized that I hadn't asked your opinion on something: the time. Is 9PM reasonable for a bar date? I know there are going to be Chads circling on friday but that's unavoidable.

>>34333

Lel, I don't think she would mind. I would hate to be with someone who couldn't take chan humor, I've been living on imageboards since I was 16, that's almost a full decade of sperg socializing and it's going to come out at times.

>>34343

>You might see gf as being a solution it isn't. gf 2018 might be a race but gf is not.

It actually is a race, though, because my mental illnesses are [intensify]ing rapidly with no female contact. I assume the same is true for other NEETs. There's also the question of what kind of relationship you'll realistically be able to wrangle in your thirties, because I have zero interest in dating a single mother or someone who's let herself go.


 No.34383

I am off to bed NEETs. A very early one tonight. I finished LOTR last night. I am tackling the appendices now. I flip through a bit and just read the bits that interest me.

Good night. Handyman is coming tomorrow. Goodbye possums.


 No.34384

>>34382

Have a wank


 No.34385

>>34382

Do you both work in the city? Is she going to have to travel all the way home to suburbia and then all the way back in for 9pm?

Probably depends what suggested doing. There isn't much you can do at 9pm that you couldn't do at 7pm, for what it's worth.


 No.34386

>>34383

>Goodbye possums.

F


 No.34387

>>34383

Planning on doing the Silmarilian?


 No.34388

>>34387

Silmarillion*


 No.34389

>>34387

I am going to try. I tried once before years ago and failed.


 No.34390

>>34389

Yeah, same. It's a tough read and not quite in the same vein as Hobbit/LOTR.


 No.34391

>>34382

So what does she look like? Has anyone asked this?


 No.34392

>>34386

This isn't Facebook, please don't do that


 No.34394

Just finished homework.

>>34380

Yeah, another NEET said that you get fined if you cant come up with a good excuse for not voting.


 No.34395

>>34393

F


 No.34396


 No.34397


 No.34398


 No.34399


 No.34400

>>34385

Nah she won't have to travel far. I just asked whether she wanted to come out for drinks.

>>34391

She's a cutie, I'm not sure what to say beyond that


 No.34401

>>34399

Fugg.


 No.34402

>>34401

At least you tried


 No.34403

>>34385

>There isn't much you can do at 9pm that you couldn't do at 7pm

Dance. Be in a crowd.


 No.34404

>>34402

Let's try this again.

*clears throat*

WHITE


 No.34406

>>34394

well to be fair it seems like the SA Election and I'd just vote for Xenophon just for chaos


 No.34407

>>34383

Mate…

Good night buddy.


 No.34408

>>34403

Have a goon in a sophisticated glass


 No.34409

>>34400

at least tell us her race


 No.34410

>>34404

GIRLS


 No.34411

>>34409

200m freestyle


 No.34412

>>34406

I heard that labor would give every home owner a 10k grant for solar

fuck labor labor sill but that is a pretty good thing


 No.34413

>>34408

Maloneys used to do free goon Tuesdays.


 No.34414

>>34404

>>34405

*clears throat*

*tips fedora*


 No.34415

>>34407

Thank you my friend. Good night.


 No.34416

>>34412

how can state labour afford that


 No.34417

>>34413

God bless their kind soles


 No.34418

>>34412

>>34416

I think it is an interest free loan.


 No.34419

>>34417

irish are known for their weird shoes aren't they


 No.34420

>>34405

o/


 No.34421

>>34418

Never pay back loan?


 No.34422

>>34419

I think they are known for their whiskers more


 No.34423

>>34421

You are thinking of my HECS


 No.34424

>>34418

so they're taking a page out of the German National Socialists and denying Jews usury, very based


 No.34425

>>34422

and potatoes but not potatoe whiskey


 No.34426

>>34425

They can draince pretty gud to


 No.34427

>>34426

draine?


 No.34428

>>34383

Thoughts on the lotr?


 No.34429

>>34016

I used to occupy myself with panic and avoidance. I'm glad I dont go on trains and buses anymore

>>34022

>3 good mornings

Karens blessings

>>34032

I put him outside last night so the dog would settle down. I hope he's ok.

>>34058

What's the difference?

>>34083

Nah, I don't think the net is any better now thn it was before though.


 No.34430

>>34427

Did famine potato make dem sad b4?


 No.34431

>>34430

a lotta loyalty for a hired potato


 No.34432

>>34431

Why cook potato before eat, taste better before?


 No.34433

>>34432

At least you can potatoe


 No.34434

>>34433

Took rare potato, anal potential was tapped in exchange


 No.34435

File: a201a4f1de46df6⋯.jpg (72.56 KB, 650x639, 650:639, only_in_dubai_01.jpg)

So is it going to be a 7, 8 or 9PM date this friday? Cast your votes


 No.34436

>>34435

I like middle numbers, so why not 8pm. 7pm feels more like dinner to me


 No.34437

File: 28c8078c982927d⋯.png (10.35 KB, 629x502, 629:502, 9a343e888ad6ee2f2dd64b3354….png)

>>34133

>it's real

>>34137

you are the constant in the NEETs disorientating life

>>34152

That's part of how I differentiate depressed from sad. Sad requires a reason.

>>34158

I was going to put the max logo on his collar but it was too small to see

>>34201

These are best wojaks, and the DAK ones. That was a cool meme.


 No.34438

>>34435

5pm and get the early bird special.


 No.34439

>>34437

They look too edgy to me. It's like it's trying to be scary and bad. The aaaahhhh red wojack had people killing themselves. Is that wojack to symbolise the action of taking a piss on their grave?


 No.34440

>>34438

I hope he brings a coupon at that time to save even more money, showing her his big spender side


 No.34441

>>34437

>tfw fractal depressed


 No.34442

>>34208

I used to have that on some cd when I was a little tacker

>>34209

>>34210

me too, I wish he still gave updates.

>>34225

heh

>>34230

The bright green mountain dew bottles

>>34283

It's still there, I dont know what it is.

I tried to have a poo and only a couple plops came out. Fucking hurts.


 No.34443

>tfw reassuringly impressed


 No.34444

>>34409

Does her race matter? I don't want to talk about her ITT if some stormweenie is going to take issue with her skin colour


 No.34445

>>34442

Your fecal impaction is still up there


 No.34446

>>34286

Your praise is the only reason I do anything.

>>34341

It's ok. I know it helps in its way.


 No.34447

>>34374

>press one for yes

>11111111111111111111111111


 No.34448


 No.34449

>>34434

you're big potatoe


 No.34450

>>34444

because I want at least one of us to have a white girlfriend

sick of niggers and chinks tbqhwu


 No.34451

>>34449

I will decline a battle of

DOOT DOOT


 No.34452

File: 286b87627df46e8⋯.png (56.04 KB, 680x398, 340:199, 286b87627df46e865ccc88815e….png)


 No.34453

File: 3e24126857fa10a⋯.jpg (26.16 KB, 542x650, 271:325, 1443149634965.jpg)

>>34436

8 it is. Now to wait anxiously for the confirmation


 No.34454

>>34435

What time do you need to be back home?


 No.34455

>>34454

Why would I need to be home at any particular time on a friday night?


 No.34456

>>34445

That's probably what it is. I haven't been eating well lately and last night I had some spag bol, which is the first meal I've had in a while.

It doesn't feel like it's moved all day though.


 No.34457

>>34452

That's like tub girl lite, it just doesn't do anything for me anymore


 No.34458

>>34456

Get some Metamusicle, drink plenty of water and take some paracetamol.


 No.34459

>>34451

was getting caught a potatoe of your plan


 No.34460

File: a7f701ac6fccec1⋯.jpg (Spoiler Image, 109.35 KB, 1019x1485, 1019:1485, m.jpg)

>>34457

That's all there is, there isn't anymore.


 No.34461

>>34458

I don't have any metamucil, I have some paracetamol though.

I hope it's over by tomorrow, I have my course again in the morn and my homeworks due.


 No.34462

File: b52536bfa3951dd⋯.jpg (39.6 KB, 750x825, 10:11, Hale_Hortler.jpg)

>deadshit on here gets date

>get jealous

>find out she's not white

>no more fucks given


 No.34463

>>34453

8pm or 9pm are both good times. I would recommend the later time if she cannot obviously make it in time. 9pm for first date seems to late I have no experience in dates, I am using intuition. If it's dinner, I would go for the earlier time.


 No.34464

File: 211e83020c03a95⋯.png (8.21 KB, 211x239, 211:239, 1513920409439.png)

>>34459

>caught a potatoe


 No.34465

>>34459

It's potato m8


 No.34466

>>34450

What happened to the NEET with the Philippines girl he met?


 No.34467

>>34460

kek

>>34461

Get an early night. Do not take more than 2 tablets it doesn't provide any extra effect. Drink some water before bed not too much but drink plenty tomorrow.

>>34462

Doesn't care, makes a post about it?


 No.34468

File: 4858fb8cfd9a2a9⋯.png (Spoiler Image, 9.08 KB, 649x327, 649:327, Potatoe uretha.png)

>>34465

That's not a potato, this is a potatoe


 No.34469

>>34467

Thanks for the advice. Will do.


 No.34470

>>34462

She's white, I was just being silly. Resume your envy


 No.34471

>>34466

Got him to go over there, took all his money and a kidney for safe keeping

>>34468

Please don't get me excited like that

>>34470

Very nice, awaiting for the incoming REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE/spergout


 No.34472

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE/spergout


 No.34473

>>34472

Well played


 No.34474

>>34471

The spergout is going to come from yours truly if she doesn't respond to my text within the next ten minutes


 No.34475

File: 172cc4b4d991884⋯.webm (2.51 MB, 640x360, 16:9, happyfam.webm)


 No.34476

>>34475

happy family, child, playing, you-will-never-have-this,


 No.34477

>>34474

Reduce those standards, it's almost 9:30 m8


 No.34478

>>34476

Wanking, goon, Cenno, Max, Dan Murphy's


 No.34479

>>34477

It's 2018, is there anyone who actually doesn't have their phone on their person 24/7?


 No.34480

>>34479

I turn my phone off at night. NEET sleep should never be disturbed.


 No.34481

>tfw having a beer with dad


 No.34482

File: 80d05af30ace351⋯.jpg (42.96 KB, 640x423, 640:423, 1455805170471-3.jpg)

>>34481

must be riveting if you're posting here


 No.34483

>tfw having a beer with the lad and he's talking to his internet friends.


 No.34484

>>34482

Alright no worries mate I'll stop sharing things with the gen then


 No.34485

>>34484

Take it out on pops not us.


 No.34486

File: e7e74f91fa47316⋯.jpg (477.74 KB, 707x629, 707:629, Johnno.jpg)

File: 764c184099a492a⋯.png (254.23 KB, 703x577, 703:577, Ooga Booga.png)

>>34455

I might have you confused with NZ-NEET whose mother controls his entire life, someone who'd impose curfews. Have some news.


 No.34487

>>34481

>>34485

What if he already has tinea from all the REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEs?


 No.34488

>>34487

Tinnitus?


 No.34489

>>34486

thommo the exec in a suit raping animal lovers.


 No.34490

>>34486

You got the right neet but she's not that controlling. Thank you for remembering nzneet canon btw


 No.34491

After being the main snarky neet I have fallen victim to another snarky neet. Im butthurt.


 No.34492

>>34491

What have you learnt?


 No.34493

>>34492

My actions may have caused other neets distress.


 No.34494

File: ad50407712b1b50⋯.jpg (62.6 KB, 570x960, 19:32, 420coral.jpg)

Every morning i wake up feeling like a wombats arsehole, half falling asleep on the way to wage, and i swear im not going to smoke da devils letucce.

And every evening i get home and smash a fat cone.

I dont even care feels good man


 No.34495

>>34296

Good luck to you girlfriendNEET. I'm linking the post >>34166 here because you fucked up the link later on and I wanted to read it

>>34319

Glad you're still around, I was hoping that you hadn't gotten too depressed to post here.

>>34381

>tfw enabled

>>34431

lol

And I hope the guy doing the weird distorted black and red wojaks keeps doing them.


 No.34496

>>34493

Get that smile off your face.


 No.34497

Narky/snarky NEETs are the gayest faggots


 No.34498

>>34490

TBH I exaggerated for the sake of drama and a guaranteed (You)


 No.34499

File: f004e04a5854365⋯.jpg (20.37 KB, 500x280, 25:14, Pepito_&_Madeline_Fogg.jpg)

File: 426980196cb7857⋯.jpg (14.48 KB, 480x360, 4:3, hqdefault.jpg)

File: 7fc5ceff2c568bc⋯.jpg (25.2 KB, 515x600, 103:120, realfeel.jpg)

I'm getting them funny old nostalgia feels again


 No.34500


 No.34501

>>34500

Oh so that's what the mysterious blank reply posts are about


 No.34502

>>34501

got him


 No.34503

File: 845c3fb08c898d8⋯.jpg (19.88 KB, 640x381, 640:381, thebravelittletoaster1.jpg)


 No.34504

>>34499

madeline was my favorite


 No.34505

>>34501

Don't know what the fuck you're on about.

I pressed new reply by accident.


 No.34506

How do I get in touch with the BO? I want all posts from my IP deleted and I understand the guy who owns this board actually visits semi-frequently so that might be possible?


 No.34507

File: b332ddce9b3b277⋯.png (73.63 KB, 300x289, 300:289, 1352589646032.png)

>>34453

wait a sec you fucking nigger

you havent told us what happened. WE DEMAND TO BE ENTERTAINED WITH GREEN TEXT.

Also what are you going to do at the bar? dont spaghet


 No.34508

File: c0eff81f8c1f15b⋯.png (334.64 KB, 807x539, 807:539, sW1c2HZ.png)

>>34503

>tfw you'll never relive it and at the time you didnt appreciate it

probably like now..


 No.34509


 No.34510

>>34509

Do I need to give a reason? I just want them gone from public view.


 No.34511

>>34510

But you have given them to the public.


 No.34512

>>34488

I don't know either anymore

>>34510

If it was me, request denied. It would mess up the board. You would need to provide a better reason with more depth.


 No.34513

>>34511

I gave them to the neets of the general, you're welcome to archive this thread.


 No.34514

Also, yes. You do need a reason. This is a matter for tribunal and the council will convene in the chambers for deliberation and goon.


 No.34515

>>34514

Mostly goon.


 No.34516

>>34514

Proudly sponsored by Dan Murphy's


 No.34517

>>34510

You will have to request an interview with the council of six.


 No.34518

>>34515

He'll get some sort of response as an outcome.


 No.34519

>>34510

If you have done something incriminating then I'm sure the authorities already have everything they need logged somewhere, trying to get all your info online deleted is futile.

If you want to turn over a new leaf or whatever then good luck I guess but I can promise you that it's a mental thing.


 No.34520

>>34512

I have reason to believe that someone I was posting about might be reading the thread and if it's true it'll fuck up my first potential relationship

>>34519

Neither of those, see above


 No.34521

>>34520

She won't, if so. Drop the line you'll take her to Dan's for some fruit juice and when the times right tell her you'll give her a special wank.


 No.34522

>>34520

I sometimes have wild erratic fancies that people I know are reading the gen. You shuld do what I do and post to random NEETs and pretend that they're the people you are pretending they're the people you're pretending they're the people you're posting to.


 No.34523

>>34520

The girl you asked out isn't reading the thread.


 No.34524

>>34520

also yeah sorry I understand that it makes old threads kinda unreadable but reeeee this is serious business for me and hopefully as a neet you understand how fragile these things are, I might not get another chance for a decade


 No.34525

>>34524

How many posts did you make?


 No.34526

>>34383

> I finished LOTR last night.

It was fun reading your little summaries every night. Thanks mate.


 No.34527

>>34523

I'm not talking about her, ofc she isn't reading an obscure daily neet thread


 No.34528

>>34522

>I sometimes have wild erratic fancies that people I know are reading the gen.

I've told my older brother about this place twice but I don't think he posts or even reads.


 No.34529

>>34435

>only in dubai

>sheik shitting in a roastie instagram model's mouth

FTFY NEET


 No.34530

>>34528

I can't even imagine telling my brother about a place like this

Not that I have anything against you cunts, I just feel like some of the posts would garner some very weird looks.


 No.34531

>>34462

We must secure the existence of our peanut pissbottles.


 No.34532

Just got back from the iron temple, m8s. Sitting naked in front of the computer and having my protein shake.

Is it just me or does Isowhey Sports taste like shit?

Wheymen.


 No.34533

>>34527

Who else then?


 No.34534

>>34532

I feel uncomfortable replying to a naked man


 No.34535

>>34532

Did you shower? Showering after gym then getting into pajamas is the comfiest feeling.


 No.34536

>>34411

Degenerate.


 No.34537

>>34522

>and pretend that they're the people you are pretending they're the people you're pretending they're the people you're posting to.

What the fuck.


 No.34538

>>34535

I like to dry out first. Also get some food in me while watching YouTube.


 No.34539

>>34525

I never stop posting in the gen, but I only want the ones gone which can identify me:

>>34382

>>34163

>>34400

>>34435

>>34474

>>34520

>>34524

>>34539

I almost want to say fuck it because there are going to be so many traces leftover that it almost makes no difference


 No.34540

>>34444

>stormweenie

Daily reminder that a lot of low tier whites are going to have to go into the ovens too.


 No.34541

>>34539

>I never stop posting in the gen, but I only want the ones gone which can identify me:

That's reasonable then and I hope the BO sees this and considers it.


 No.34542

>>34532

Get Bulk Nutrients my good man.


 No.34543

>>34539

Specifically pointing out the posts you don't want someone to see is probably not a brilliant idea


 No.34544

>>34528

>>34530

I told my older brother about here. He doesn't read it and doesn't care about the "autism forum I keep going on about". I sometimes tell him the stories here though.


 No.34545

>>34544

My older brother is as autistic as I am so I thought he'd like it


 No.34546

>>34544

What do you tell him about?


 No.34547

>>34539

I'd be the last person to call someone paranoid but you are the personification of that word right now, no one from real life is reading your posts


 No.34548

>>34475

Needs music


 No.34549

>>34546

>What do you tell him about?

I go on a imageboard for NEETs, he doesn't like imageboards though and calls it the autism forum


 No.34550

>>34527

>obscure daily neet thread

>regularly a top ten fastest thread on all of cripplechan


 No.34551

>>34550

Even the special olympics has gold medalists


 No.34552

>>34528

Is he a NEET too?


 No.34553

>>34534

No homo, fellow NEET.


 No.34554

>>34553

you better have been flaccid while you were typing that


 No.34555

>>34539

ASIO here. Hold still, NEET. We're coming to pick you up.


 No.34556

>>34547

I'm not being paranoid and I can't explain how I know because that'll just confirm it, BO I've used this board for ages can you just help me please


 No.34557

>>34555

This post violates neet law. Prepare to be gulag'd


 No.34558

>>34556

My dad jerks off to my posts


 No.34559

>>34542

What do you think about Musashi?


 No.34560

>>34544

>tfw no older brother to keep me on the straight and narrow


 No.34561

>>34556

You didn't tell anyone IRL about this board, did you?


 No.34562

>>34558

Does he tap your post potential?


 No.34563

>>34559

Musashi is way too expensive and all the normie brands have too much sugar anyway. Go with bulknutrients WPC like the other cunt suggested.


 No.34564

File: 05f95c50b7ddf90⋯.jpg (125.31 KB, 1102x967, 1102:967, 05f95c50b7ddf90e25a520d972….jpg)

>>34560

>tfw a bad example for my little brother


 No.34565

>>34556

Every time you have posted, you have revealed 0.7 - 1.2 bits of entropy about your true identity.

As there are only 24.13 million people in Australia, We only require 23 bits of entropy to narrow this down to 2.876 candidates. Three is a trivial number of people for Us to acquire, considering Our substantial capabilities.


 No.34566

>>34563

I'm gonna be honest, fam. I just buy whatever Coles has on the shelf.


 No.34567

>>34565

Are you an alien or a jew?


 No.34568

>>34567

What I am is not important. What's important is what I'm going to do.


 No.34569

>>34568

Ayy lmao


 No.34570

>>34552

He has a job, went to uni, and even had children but he's spiritually a NEET I feel.


 No.34571

File: df559c41f24c7a7⋯.jpg (Spoiler Image, 21.04 KB, 480x360, 4:3, 1513721777921.jpg)

>>34520

yes anon its me your paranoia

>>34520


 No.34572

File: 2325d350dfedd89⋯.jpg (636.19 KB, 1000x1500, 2:3, neet the parents.jpg)

If BO doesn't help me then nzneet is leaving /ausneets/ for good, that is so fucked.


 No.34573

>>34548

it has music

unless it's fucked for everyone but me


 No.34574

>>34537

Don't go pretending that you don't know that you're pretending that you don't know that you're pretending that you don't know that you're not getting what I'm on about.


 No.34575

>>34534

Gimme a (You) baby.


 No.34576

>>34544

I tell my mate about this place pretty often. He wont accept that he belongs here.


 No.34577

>>34556

This board isn't ages old.


 No.34578

>>34575

I'm (Your) Man.


 No.34579

Had some paracetamol with codeine and drinking water. Just had a bath too. My gut's feeling a fair bit better at the moment.


 No.34580

File: e4fb9b05c3efb59⋯.jpg (35.94 KB, 550x572, 25:26, based_lenny.JPG)


 No.34581

>>34572

Stop letting paranoia get to you, I doubt the BO is just going to delete shit if you don't even give him a reason, there is zero chance of the girl finding your posts here so stop worrying about it.


 No.34582

>>34580

Is he eating Lou Reed?


 No.34583

What are you doing?


 No.34584

File: 2c1019c1d4fb8ab⋯.gif (996.39 KB, 500x300, 5:3, Ed tfw depressed becomes t….gif)

>>34284

Can't say I'm not jealous. It is nice to see at least one of us progressing towards GF2018 though, just wish it were me.


 No.34585

>>34579

I haven't had a bath in a long time


 No.34586

File: bb18e401a4ca9b7⋯.png (1.6 KB, 356x22, 178:11, spagett.png)

>>34583

Cleaning up spaghetti code.

Been a sluggish as fuck day just feeling nauseous.


 No.34587

>>34585

Had some radox in it, it's ice but it makes my hair go funny.

>>34586

what's that for?


 No.34588

>>34587

nice*


 No.34589

Mouse NEET how is the mouse going?


 No.34590

File: 744e10f517bfbf0⋯.png (614.72 KB, 996x561, 332:187, SOMEBODY_TOUCHA_MY_SPAGHET.PNG)


 No.34591

Good night neets

Going to take a few days break from the internet so if you notice a lack of brainletposting that may be why. See you cunts Friday.


 No.34592

>>34586

Where do you work, CoderNEET?


 No.34593

>>34589

Mouse is gone out in to the big wide world.

They grow up so fast.


 No.34594

>>34562

Every night


 No.34595

>>34591

Good night mate, hope it does you good.


 No.34596

>>34587

Still working on that silly collab pixel indie shmup game.

>>34592

>work

Working on my piss bottle collection, does that count?

>>34591

Night, NEET. Keep it real.


 No.34597

>>34563

normie protein fitness brands are an absolute menace, you are right.

>>34566

Bulk Nutrients WPC or Optimum Nutrition isoalte if you're loaded


 No.34598

>>34581

I thought he was trolling at first, I can get pretty paranoid but that is next level.

NZNEET just calm down m8, I know what you're going through worrying about everything. I've done that in the past and fucked everything up beyond belief, if I had just forgotten about everything and literally been myself everything would have been fine. Imagine you now stressing about this girl and then sperging out and saying something weird instead of just chilling and it going fine.


 No.34599

I wonder if the NEET is going to be on his date with the girl and they'll walk past a Dan's and he'll just start laughing. Or if he's going to forget to take off the pepe on his wrist and he'll freeze up when the girl asks him what's with the tattoo.


 No.34600

>>34593

How did it recover after being covered in oil last night?


 No.34601

>>34599

>tattooing a pepe on your wrist

that is next level


 No.34602

>>34596

>does that count?

Does it pay well?


 No.34603

>>34602

About 480 a fortnight if Cenno's not being a bitch.


 No.34604

>>34603

Sounds like the government is unusually effective at converting my tax money into pissbottles.


 No.34605

>>34600

I gave it a little wash and it started moving a bit better.

I don't like it's odds tbh.


 No.34606

Flossed my teeth for the first time in about 6 months. There was minimal bleeding/pain but I can already feel the gums swelling. I was expecting a lot of blood and pain but guess my teeth aren't in that bad of condition considering I haven't been to a dentist in at least 5 (though probably 10) years.


 No.34607

>>34606

They shouldn't be bleeding at all, dude. You just clean out the space between the teeth, not saw into the gums themselves.


 No.34608

File: 62fc07dd4227245⋯.png (71.94 KB, 374x619, 374:619, every fucking time.png)

Do I have to notify the GF2018 admissions committee that I'm no longer eligible to participate this year?


 No.34609

>>34608

What an elaborate ruse.


 No.34610

>>34608

Tough break, buddy.


 No.34611


 No.34612

File: 2164340f5731d8e⋯.jpg (18.25 KB, 247x204, 247:204, the future.jpg)

Good night friends, hope you all have merry dreams.


 No.34613

>>34605

Post pics of it


 No.34614

>>34612

Good night, get well-rested.


 No.34615

File: 3ab9ca672b9fecc⋯.jpg (36.87 KB, 621x672, 207:224, 1465812538892.jpg)

>>34608

What a fucking cunt. Tell her that for leading you on to agreeing to a date when she is already with someone, I'm serious, nail that she is useless whore into her brain.


 No.34616

>>34608

Women are so retarded


 No.34617

>>34612

Good night.


 No.34618

File: 149898066638b5d⋯.png (15.24 KB, 682x554, 341:277, iktfb.png)

>>34609

>>34610

>>34611

>>34615

>>34616

Do you reckon she's lying about having a boyfriend? This is so ridiculous I'm not even sure how to respond to her. Am I supposed to pivot and pretend it wasn't meant to be a date?


 No.34619

>>34617

Night


 No.34620

>>34605

It would've slid down whatever snake's mouth easily because of the olive oil.

>>34607

I probably went a bit too 'high' between some teeth

>>34608

That's harsh m8. But you will meet other women in the future. Learn from this experience and like others have said it'll get easier with each woman you talk to/potentially ask out.

>>34612

Good night friendo, see you in the morning.


 No.34621

>>34618

>Do you reckon she's lying about having a boyfriend?

Yes I think so. However I also think that's not important. Pay no stock to what women say, only to what they do. It doesn't matter what stupid shit comes out of her mouth because the lack of interest and her behaviour here mean that she is worth no more of your time.

>This is so ridiculous I'm not even sure how to respond to her. Am I supposed to pivot and pretend it wasn't meant to be a date?

If I was in your position I'd block her. Don't pivot or walk it back if it ever does comes up, that's duplicitous, unattractive behaviour.


 No.34622

>>34618

Respond with: "Why did you agree to a date if you have a boyfriend?"

Also, what does she say after the but which is censored, is she offering another time or some bullshit?


 No.34623

>>34611

CUCK MY


 No.34624

>>34623

BOYFRIEND


 No.34625

File: 59842b6eff1265c⋯.jpg (136.97 KB, 892x873, 892:873, thekings.jpg)

>>34608

hahaha im dyingn


 No.34626

sorry neet, make an excuse and bail out

dont get salty

and just have a go at another girl


 No.34627

>>34624

UP FAM


 No.34628

NZNEET, why don't you just cuck the boyfriend?


 No.34629

>>34618

You gotta play it cool man. Tell her you don't care about the dinner, you'll take her out to drinks and bang her and she can show up late, her bf needs to deal with it.


 No.34630

File: 4b648d69ca53811⋯.jpg (209.08 KB, 624x480, 13:10, O3UA0hZ.jpg)

>>34620

> Learn from this experience

I'm not sure what I'm supposed to learn from this. I mean obviously I need to become more attractive somehow but other than that? I think I handled this fine.

>>34622

>>34621

I already know her response is going to be that she didn't know it was meant to be a date. I'm not going to be pushy about it, I have no interest in being her friend so I just want to disengage smoothly without creating future problems. I have to see her almost every day for the next few years, after all. I don't even feel like replying tbh but I need to respond with something.

Yes, the rest of her text was an offer of an alternative time and place. Can you imagine if I actually showed up? fucking lol


 No.34631

>>34630

Put on the chad mask and cuck her boyfriend. You can do it m8.


 No.34632

Actually fuck it, you cunts don't want to hear any details from this point onward, it's just boring damage control from here on out.

I'm going to bed, night-night neets

>>34631

lol


 No.34633

>>34630

yeah hey thats the best idea.

Whatever she asked, just go "oh na i cant then i have x" leave it like that or

"than time doesnt work, what about x" and she says "than time doesnt work what about x"

and then go on from there till someone stops replying


 No.34634

>>34630

>not sure what I'm supposed to learn from this

A better way to put it is 'conditioning'. You're building an emotional 'callous' to rejection with each female encounter.

>>34632

Night, see you in the AM


 No.34635

>>34586

CoderNEET, are you coding vidya gaems?


 No.34636

File: d56a8eaae795152⋯.png (42.36 KB, 492x491, 492:491, high class mixels.png)

>>34635

Yeah, it's going alright.

The artist is fantastic. A yank, and more motivated than I am.

Maybe not so good with the concept of not putting green on green on green, but we're working on it.


 No.34637

>>34636

i'd fuck that slime monster


 No.34638

>>34636

Wow nice! What are you making it in?


 No.34639

File: e1970098b4af5eb⋯.gif (39.38 KB, 104x129, 104:129, Queenidle_104x129_4c_4r_15….gif)

>>34637

Looks better animated.

>>34638

Think I've brought it up, GODOT.

Definitely recommended for anyone looking to get into games/projects for fun. GDscript is Python-tier, and it gives you full control over the engine.

Hasn't given me any issues, and this is just meant to be a shorter project.


 No.34640

>>34639

If you brought it up, it was in a different thread and I didn't see it. Sorry, NEET.

Animation looks great. I sure do love tiddies.


 No.34641

>tfw have an appointment at 9am but can't be fucked to go


 No.34642

Just tried to order dominos. It was 10pm and the store wasn't open because of muh public holiday. I can't wait until robots replace these useless wagies so anyone can get a pizza anytime.


 No.34643

>>34641

It feels like High school or work, doesn't it? It is a shit feeling.


 No.34644

File: 5d52a22312351b9⋯.jpg (330.92 KB, 1383x1600, 1383:1600, 1382808200023.jpg)

>>34208

veronica mars?

>>34608

Wow, this went from nothing to everything and back to nothing in a span of a few posts. I hope you won't accept her invitation to reschedule if she gave it. You should make it obvious that you at least thought it was a date and aren't interested anymore or go with an obvious romantic intent despite the boyfriend complication. Don't go as "friends" though. That's just too brutal.

>>34639

will you give us demos to try out once you think you're far enough?


 No.34645

>>34643

Yeah, i cant enjoy anything for a whole 24 hours before an appointment. It's like theres a doom clock counting down like in muh japanese rpgs. It's probably what wagies feel 24/7.


 No.34646

File: 89aef1fb92cd942⋯.jpg (26.04 KB, 480x360, 4:3, president_of_my_heart.jpg)

My fellow NEETs.

I have signed legislation.

That will outlaw MAX Employment forever.

We begin bombing in five minutes.


 No.34647

>>34608

WHAT THE FUCK


 No.34648

>>34646

Good, my first name is Maximillian and my mother makes the joke about "Max employment? it'd be a miracle if you got employed at all!" EVERY TIME WE DRIVE PAST


 No.34649

>>34644

>will you give us demos to try out once you think you're far enough?

Ah sure, I'll keep y'all updated. Wouldn't cut the gen out of the loop like that.

>>34648

I mean that sounds infuriating, but your second-hand frustration is kinda a little funny.


 No.34650

>>34648

just call yourself max you toss tbh


 No.34651

>>34648

>my first name is Maxim

Russian detected.


 No.34652

>>34650

>>34651

I just go by max, its just that its lengthened to Maximillian

which is roman


 No.34653

nite


 No.34654

>>34652

My name is big bill


 No.34655

Good night, NEETs. 653 poasts - not bad for a Monday. See you all tomorrow.


 No.34656

>>34654

Healthy-at-any-size Bill


 No.34657

>>34654

Executive Bill


 No.34658

>>34652

We wuz greeks and romans and sheeeit


 No.34659

>>34410

>tfw no commonfilth fans on my board


 No.34660


 No.34661

>>34653

>>34655

Nighty night, Neets.


 No.34662

>>34654

My name is Blinky Bill


 No.34663

File: 25c10b48f4ea7b7⋯.gif (220.73 KB, 500x375, 4:3, no.gif)


 No.34664

>>34663

Hello jeeves


 No.34665

File: b24bad62c0776f6⋯.jpg (28.85 KB, 680x510, 4:3, you got.jpg)


 No.34666

Good morning NEETs. I am up bright and early today. It is still dark though.


 No.34667

>>34666

Satanic trips

nice weather isnt it?


 No.34668

>>34667

It is quite windy where I am.


 No.34669

>>34668

it was comfy raining in syd just a minute ago, i sat out in the rain after a shower.


 No.34670

Hey crackas.


 No.34671

>>34670

Hi muhammed


 No.34672

I am back from walking Doggo. It was pretty comfy out in the dark. The moon was out and all the clouds were lit by moonlight.


 No.34673

>>34618

>boyfriend

Sorry to hear this has happened, mate.

Normally I'd advise that you completely ghost her, but that's a bit hard if you work together.

Don't proceed with any activities outside of work, that will just make you another of her orbiters.


 No.34674

>>34672

Sounds nice.

I have just arrived at work and am drinking a coke.


 No.34675

>>34613

I put it outside


 No.34676

>>34648

It should be illegal for Mummybots to troll their NEET sons.


 No.34677

File: 4812afa17b25e49⋯.jpg (59.95 KB, 580x326, 290:163, windows xp hill.jpg)

Good morning friends


 No.34678

>>34677

Morning mate.

Your vineyard looks a little bereft of grapes..


 No.34679

File: 0705e41f97c177c⋯.png (4.27 KB, 235x215, 47:43, 0705e41f97c177c4751b12587e….png)

>>34677

>morning


 No.34680

File: 2357b4063a524b9⋯.jpg (1 MB, 1920x1200, 8:5, windows_xp_bliss-wide.jpg)

>>34678

> bereft

That's a good word.

It's apparently this hill.


 No.34681

>>34680

Was that the Microsoft wallpaper hill?


 No.34682


 No.34683

>>34674

>coke at this hour

You need to sort your lifestyle out mate.


 No.34684

>>34677

Good morning m8.


 No.34685

Less than three hours until the handyman comes to possum-proof my shed. I hope it all gets done today. No more delays.


 No.34686

>>34676

Are you the guy whose mummybot burned you with a sick Family Feud answer?


 No.34687


 No.34688

>>34674

>and am

Are you fucking retarded? *and I am


 No.34689

>>34685

If he looks like trying to leave, lock him in the shed.


 No.34690

File: 51dbab51c8aeea6⋯.png (207.31 KB, 380x380, 1:1, final possum solution.png)

File: 911b6f7f3b4f64c⋯.png (2.65 MB, 1024x1221, 1024:1221, possum jew.png)

>>34685

If feels like we are coming to an end of an era.


 No.34691

>>34688

What I wrote was gramatically correct. Perfectly cromulent, even.


 No.34692

>>34688

You sure are.


 No.34693

>>34691

am much horny for bobs and vagene, stupid curry muncher.


 No.34694

>>34693

I'm not sure I like you.


 No.34695

File: 7eca6e022e675d0⋯.png (97.05 KB, 700x454, 350:227, 1502184116450.png)

Have a good day NEETs, I'm off to my course.


 No.34696


 No.34697

>>34695

Have a good day mate. See you when you get back.


 No.34698

Also, good luck today with the possum proofer, hope he does a job worthy of the wait.


 No.34699

>>34694

am not liking you either poo in the loo


 No.34700

>>34698

Thank you. I will let you know how it goes.


 No.34701

>>34699

Shut up, you clog-wearing kaaskop dicksuckinflog[1] marsh nigger.

http://www.rsdb.org/race/dutch


 No.34702

>>34701

What's a VPN? am Australian.


 No.34703

>>34702

You just used currymuncher grammar.


 No.34704

File: 30b73b6be2aa5b6⋯.jpg (12.69 KB, 258x245, 258:245, CkN1JdHXIAAwKJW.jpg)

>>34701

>marsh nigger


 No.34705

>>34703

am doing on purpose


 No.34707

YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.


 No.34708

>>34659

It's a good feeling, he's an anti-white spic.


 No.34709

File: d949f5474251906⋯.png (1.4 MB, 1920x1080, 16:9, out050843.png)

File: 9d7714c8784093d⋯.png (1.33 MB, 1920x1080, 16:9, out050844.png)

File: 882f10025dfc603⋯.png (1.3 MB, 1920x1080, 16:9, out050845.png)

>>34666

Morning mr satan. Please don't corrupt my wayward daughter.

>>34670

>>34677

Morning to you two too.


 No.34710

>>34709

Put some trousers on, Karen.


 No.34711

>>34709

Good morning Karen.

Karen could teach Satan a thing or two about corruption.


 No.34712

>>34709

Good morning Korean cartoon girl enthusiast.


 No.34713

File: 9028aaa2fe363e2⋯.gif (1.45 MB, 326x256, 163:128, wMYNNDV.gif)

Morning cunts

>8:30AM this morning, laying in bed fapping to pornhub on my ancient android

>ring ring ring, random number

>swipe on the caller, mind still cloudy from the early morning depression haze and the masturbatory mindfog, say good morning

>Hello, am I speaking to nzneet? Great, this is HR roastie, how are you? I'm great too, just calling about the role you applied for at minimum wage corporation, are you still interested? blah blah

>have an entire phone interview mid-wank

She's probably going to offer me the job and then text me later to say she completely forgot that Chad already got the position


 No.34714

File: a75ea31fd11b145⋯.png (1.62 MB, 1307x728, 1307:728, CaptureNatsukiR4.png)

Morning NEETS.


 No.34715

I woke up in a fucked up way. I was dreaming that I was bare-chested and swatting at insects in my house with a button-up tshirt and I hit a place where the ceiling was exposed. Later I put the shirt back on and saw a thin, long-legged spider with an orange body fall out. More and more spiders began falling out. I realised that the shirt was full of spiders and gingerly tried to take it off but by that time there was a swarm of spiders spreading out on my body. They started biting me, and various body parts were feeling cold and numb, but then I woke up and those body parts were simply those that were exposed to the cold air beyond my blanket.


 No.34716

>>34713

He took his fedora off.


 No.34717

Who else is eating eggs this morning?


 No.34718

>>34715

That sucks m8, I seem to have dreams where I get shot or stabbed or eviscerated by a chainsaw recently. I remember one dream where a crocodile was chasing me through my yard and house. No bug dreams yet.


 No.34719


 No.34720

>>34717

Oh shit I just scrambled some. Also good morning everyone.


 No.34721

>>34720

I'm eating four eggs this morning, can't wait to smell my farts.


 No.34722

>>34720

Good morning.

I don't like eggs very much.


 No.34723

File: 7d4efb2f402f6d0⋯.jpeg (40.53 KB, 500x333, 500:333, 1ae3cd5a45e8dba5245656592….jpeg)

>>34722

>I don't like eggs very much.


 No.34724

>>34723

why do anime girls have big eyes? they're japanese, they should have slitty eyes


 No.34725

My toilet stool just arrived. It is quite solid, I'm impressed. I will try it on the toilet probably tomorrow.


 No.34726

>>34725

Have you already pooed today?


 No.34727


 No.34728

>>34727

That's ok. I thought it might have been typical NEET procrastination or fear of the unknown.


 No.34729

File: f99d8d55dd95c7e⋯.jpg (746.26 KB, 1224x1632, 3:4, 0843.JPG)

>tfw comfy


 No.34730

>>34728

I am a bold and brave NEET.


 No.34732

>>34729

Mr Fancypants


 No.34733

File: 3769b98f692709e⋯.jpg (34.69 KB, 780x438, 130:73, 432525.jpg)

>>34732

I buy my pants from kmart.


 No.34734

>>34733

I'm not talking about your literal pants.


 No.34735

>>34734

I know.


 No.34736

So many ugly and illiterate sluts in my area.


 No.34737

>>34736

Somewhere some ugly illiterate slut is complaining about all the beta NEETs in her area.


 No.34738

>>34737

Well they ain't my problem.


 No.34739

NEW THREAD >>34725

NEW THREAD >>34725

NEW THREAD >>34725

NEW THREAD >>34725

NEW THREAD >>34725

NEW THREAD >>34725


 No.34740

File: fb2006a5ea76103⋯.png (30.14 KB, 400x400, 1:1, 1425132403971.png)


 No.34741

I am making a new thread.


 No.34742


 No.34743

>>tfw woke up depressed


 No.34744

>>34739

Cheeky, I laughed.

>>34743

That sucks, man.


 No.34745

>tfw woke up dressed


 No.34747

Morning cumguzzlers


 No.34749

>>34747

Good morning.


 No.34750

New Thread: >>34748

New Thread: >>34748

New Thread: >>34748

New Thread: >>34748

New Thread: >>34748

New Thread: >>34748

Real this time.


 No.34753

still postin


 No.34754

>>34753

second last


 No.34755

>>34753

I love Karen




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