Sup faggots, I finally got out of the psych ward.
Every once in a while I write a pseudo journal like suicide letter when I'm depressed to just vent feeling and sort out the things in life I hate. On the flipside of that, I write motivational letters too, where I list the shit I plan to do to improve. When Im done writing these, I just delete them.
Here's the down low
>be me, 24yo depressed neet
>writing aforementioned letters
>get told that we're bout to vist grandma since the pa just died
>putting on socks and shoes
>dad walks in room
>I forgot to lock door
>sees computer screen and like an absolute faggot decides to read whats on it
>thinks I'm writing a real suicide note and Im bout to off myself
>calls mom over
>as Im explaining what it is, she straight up calls the cops
>she prints out the letter, but only the fake suicide one
>cop says he has to look at each thing as an individual case, so context and intent doesnt matter
>get escorted to police car and taken to psych ward
>tell story to intern at processing
>he tells it to doc
>doc says Im a threat and admits me
>I tell story to nurses, psychiatrists, counsellors, etc…
>they don't give a shit let along even really listen
>see judge after a few days
>he "defers to the experts"
>the expert being a psychiatrist who wants to put me on tons of meds and claimed I'm not mentally fit to make decisions regarding my own care
>psychiatrist says I have a choice
>my choice being I take the meds and go to a daily 5 hour program for 5 weeks OR he wont release me from psych ward
>I "willingly" agree to
So here I am. Now I actually do feel suicidal because psych ward is hell. Can't sleep for shit. The nurse walks into your room every 15 minutes and shines a light at your face to see if you're breathing. Bathroom only has a curtain. Have to get permission to go every time. Group sessions are hippie bullshit like talking through to a horse mentally and finding out that it can't walk because it's sad that a baby bird died in the stable. You sit on hard plastic couches all day long, unable to sleep or do shit to pass the time. "You're safe now that you're here, Anon"
What will happen to me if I refuse to go to the daily program or take the ketamine treatment? I'm out now so they can't keep me in, but since I was taken involuntarily, I'm afraid they'll send the police to take me back and claim I'm a threat.