No.71286
>Be me
>Work nightshift…all i have to do is watch 3 machine working on their own
>One night get bored
>Start baneposting
>"What are you saying ANON?". WTF My boss rarely visit me
>NOTHING I SAID NOTHING
FEELS GOOD MAN.jpg
>OK is everything all right here?
>YES THE PRODUCTION RISES
FEELS LIKE BIG GUY.jpg
No.71339
>>71286
>NOTHING I SAID NOTHING
Always the best cop out when people get weirded out.
No.71379
>>71286
The most I've managed is to sneak an "extremely painful for him" on a literature exam
No.71414
>working at laundry place
>usually pressing shirt or napkins
>at the front filing clothing
>woman says that the order of sweaters is a big load
>almost say "for you"
>grin while trying to hold back a laugh
No.71440
I initiated my workplace, the hotheads are being hotheads while people banepost to communicate otherwise.
No.71493
I work as a waiter at an independent living facility.
>CIA pose constantly when talking to residents and coworkers
>"Give me your order, I'll send it in."
>Residents have unironically called me a big guy before (I'm 6'1 200lb, tallest and biggest guy at my work)
>Have to control the urge to laugh when they do
>I always say "Of course!" Never sure, or absolutely, or something similar.
>residents sometimes complain that portions are too big.
>"That's a big plate, anon."
>for you
>one day I have to cook
>head chef asks if I've started the stove
>"Yes. The fire rises."
>"You're a funny guy, anon."
>for you
>New residents move in frequently
>recently one resident moves in and is always wearing an oxygen mask
>When they first moved in I said, "Tell me about Mrs. [redacted], why does she wear the mask?"
I have more but I can't think of them right now.
No.71514
>at the gym, trying to become a big guy
>having trouble getting the right posture for squats
>mate shows me an article on it for advice
>have to stop myself from laughing
No.71515
>>71514
The only thing you need to become a big guy is to squat like you're taking a shit on a toilet. Been working for me since i was 14
No.71520
>Haven't seen a friend in a while when he asks if I'm fine with him coming over
>I say it's okay and he arrives a few hours later with a few mutual friends
>I'm fairly surprised so I practically scream the words "UH, YOU DON'T GET TO BRING FRIENDS!"
>Everybody just stares at me as I nervously stammer out an attempt at an explanation
No.74410
Made another thread by mistake, but here you go:
>be in university
>foreign language class
>learning german seit zwei jahren
>teacher left us a project during summer, which was watching a german, subtitled novel + make an analysis out of it
>first day back
>teacher asks what we thought about the novel
>everything good
>then class starts as normal
>teacher wants to emphasize in the use of adjectives, since it will be required in the final essay
>asks classmates to describe characters from the novel
>asks to describe Jonas
>"nett", "nicht punktlich", "energievoll", etc.
>one student literally says "Er ist groβ."
>silence
>inner autism kicks in
>two months of shitposting led me to this
>before teacher could say anything I speak up
>"Für dich."
>further silence
>teacher snaps out of the confusion and agrees with me, repeating what I said to the other classmate
>teacher suggests extra adjectives that could be used better to same classmate
>class goes on as normal
>mein Gesicht, wann das Teil nicht von mein Plan war
No.74411
>>74410
Du bist ja ein großer Junge.
No.79667
>>71493
Now this is how you banepost IRL
No.86726
No.86741
>the entire front page is nothing but dying old threads bumped to the top
what gives
No.86750
Not exactly IRL, but here we go:
>Be me, playing DOTA 1
>All Random
>Get Bane
>Chuckle to myself because Bane
>Laning with a bounty hunter who was way too fucking aggressive and blamed me every-time he got himself killed.
>"Was getting caught part of your plan?" I ask him. I chuckle some more.
>He's a hothead. He just swears at me.
>He tower dives again, this time I don't even try to help him. He asks why.
>"They expect one of us in the wreckage, brother." I'm cackling to myself now. He's raging hard.
>I realize I haven't bought any items since my boots.
>I have enough for Arcane Boots
>No
>I buy the Morbid Mask
>I'm dying with levity
>It arrives
>I wait until someone notices
>BH sees it and freaks out
>"Nobody cared who I was until I put on the mask."
No.86770
>work in warehouse
>heavy as fuck order comes in
>co-worker looks at the cargo in the truck
>that's a big order, where's it going?
>f-for you.
>what was that anon?
>nothing, I said nothing
Some other day
>lifting boxes
>really heavy box that I can't lift alone.
>anon get [bane] to help you, he's a big guy
>without thinking I say it
>for you
>what?
>nothing, I said nothing
>okay just get him to help
>of course!
No.86772
>be me
>find a guy shorter than me
>walk up to him
>"Y-you're a small g-guy!"
>begin giggling uncontrollably
>small guy turns around abruptly
>"What the fuck did you just say, kid?"
>can't contain my laughter
>begin farting really loudly
>"F-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-for YOU!"
>my lels are in orbit at this point
>he grabs me by the shirt and lifts me off the ground
>"Gimme one good reason why I shouldn't smash your face in, you little shit!"
>"W-w-w-wow y-you're a hothead heh…"
>throws me to the ground
>begins kicking me
>picks me up again
>begin pleading for my life
>"PLE-PLEA-PLEASE DON'T CRASH MY PLANE WITH NO SURVIVORS IT WOULD BE EXTREMELY PAINFUL FOR ME I WAS ONLY PARROTING AN EPIC MEME I H-HEARD ON THIS WEBSITE CALLED BANE"
>hothead drops me
>"Kid, you need to get help."
>proceeds to walk away like nothing happened
>suddenly the skies open up
>a big guy crashes to the earth
>it's Bane
>without a word he shoots the hothead before throwing him out of a plane
>his majestic form approaches me
>I prostrate myself before him
>"I-i-i-t was a hothead, sir."
>"And you told him about /bane/?"
>"I didn't know what to do!"
>"You panicked, and your weakness has cost you your spaghetti."
>grabs me by the throat
>tears off my clothes
>"You're going to see what a big guy I really am!"
>throws me onto my hands and knees
>with a mighty bellow of "I'M IN CHARGE HERE", he files his flight plan with my agency
>mfw he is a big guy for me
>mfw it is extremely painful
>pass out
>wake up
>I am now a plane
>can feel the plane scene playing out within me
>mfw I am the Wreckage Brother
>mfw about to crash with no survivors
No.86778
>>74411
Für die Lehrer
gechekt
No.87083
>be at a copier in an office
>qt. 3.14 approaches.
>"ugh, the copies didn't come out like how I wanted, should I be frustrated, anon?"
>"you're just being a hothead."
>"you sure about that?"
>"Of Coursh!"
>she laughs then walks away
No.87087
When I was working with My Uncle's landscaping company Over the Summer One of the Guy's almost solely referred to me as "Big Guy" (most of them were Puerto Ricans, so that should explain it.) I never had to hold anything back as much in my life, every time I'd finish up work I'd go back to my Uncle's house Fall on my couch and laugh into a pillow for well over a minute. It really brightened up my days, and I was disappointed when I was sent to Houses that one guy wasn't at, since I wouldn't be holding in Laughter all day. That's all I've got so far Brothers.
No.87138
No.87140
>>86772
needs a screencap tbh
No.87143
>>71414
A new one:
>at work
>fucking yellow jackets all over the place
>smack one with a fly swatter while another employee is watching
>"He didn't fly so good!"
>other employee gives me a weird look
>mfw
>>87083
She wants to grab your prize, brother.
No.87169
Brothers, I have the best job and that's why I can always repeat the plane scene and banepost IRL
>flying planes
>every time I depart or arrive I recite the plane scene in my mind
>"turn right and track 032" "of course"
>this is a big plane
>if there is a turbulence "we didn't fly so good" on the radio
>if somehow there are too many luggage "uh, you don't get to bring bags"
>every time we have a meeting of error and threat management I get out of the room saying "next time there will be just one of us in the wreckage" or "let's crush this plane"
I'm living the dream brothers, soon one day you will hear me banepost on the radio flight
No.87216
>>87169
it confronts and chills me at the same time to know that we actually have a real plane enthusiast here on our board
No.87221
>>87143
>He didn't fly so good!
kek
No.87234
>>87169
Yes ! I expect one of us in the cockpit, brother.
No.87236
>>71286
>>71339
>Baneposting at home as usual
>Parents hear and say 'You said something?'
>Nothing! I said nothing!
>They give me a dumbfounded stare
No.87262
>initiate a brother
>he baneposts with me all the time
>we sing banestar
>go over to mutual friends house
>we watch the undatables
>guy called Shane is on
>TELL ME ABOUT SHANE, WHY DOES HE WRITE POETRY. A LOTTA OF LOYALTY FOR A HIRED RETARD
>everyone's joining in
the fire is rising
No.87838
No.88193
>>87169
Brother….. You can see the state the board is in.. We need you right now.
No.88196
>>87169
You are the hero every airline deserves. If you ever find yourself in a situation where a plane crash is inevitable, please scream baneposting at the top of your lungs so the black box records it.
No.88200
No.89864
>>71493
you make me proud brother
No.89876
No.89879
>>88196
Say you'll meet the big guy in the sky?
No.89938
>Work in a restaurant
>Order bowl of chicken cause I wanna be a big guy
>Co-worker tells me "thats a big bowl of chicken anon"
>"For You"
>He looks at me, assumes CIA stance
>We banepost irl whenever we can
No.90668
>>86741
THE OLD THREADS RISE
No.90690
>At home
>AC repairmen come to repair AC
>"Yeah one of them's upstairs"
>"Think you can show me big guy?"
>"for you"
Another
>Play Melee competitively
>Tag is Big Guy
>Commentate at local tournament occasionally
>Banepost constantly
>Fox side-b's off stage
>"he didn't fly so good!"
>"Oh wow Ganon's living to a really high percent"
>"Yeah he's a pretty big guy"
>Falco short-hop lasers, then gets the mythical d-throw kill
>"I've gotta ask why he would shoot a Fox before throwing him off the stage"
Last one for now
>Work in a restaurant kitchen
>Halloween
>People come to the cork bar (just outside the kitchen, you can see pretty much everything from there
>A group comes in, only one is costumed
>He's got a mask
>They're all getting wasted and talking to us
>Masketta Man goes to take a shit
>"So, tell me about your friend, why does he wear the mask"
>They all look at me like I'm a fucking retard (for good reason)
>"Lotta loyalty for some hired friends"
>Didn't realized Masketta Man had just left he bathroom
>"Perhaps they're wondering why someone would spray a dish, before putting it in the machine?"
>Coworkers and I can't contain laughter
>"Anon get back to work! We need those desserts"
>>71379
>painful for him
>hothead
>>reddit
No.90692
No.90723
>>90690
Bravo, my tag is my country's version of CIA.
No.90855
>>90692
>At school
>Need to take a shuttle to get to campus
>It's the Friday before Halloween
>Khakis, blue polo and darker blue jacket
>I have become CIA
>Stand at all my bus stops in the power pose
>Been waiting for a shuttle for 20 minutes to get back to the dorm
>Several shuttles come and go
>None of them are my prize
>Finally the YNorth arrives
>Stranger gets off
>Takes backpack off, approaches me, bag held as if a gift.
>My whole life has led to this moment
>Grab bag in one hand, shake with the other
>"Dr. Pavel I'm CIA"
>"Who? I'm gonna need my money nigga"
>Sadness fills me
>"Sorry, wrong guy"
>Board shuttle dejected
>Man sitting in front of me
>"He was probably just wondering why you would shake his hand, before throwing out your name"
>>90723
What country is that?
No.90919
>>87169 (update on the flight plan)
>back from a flight
>call approach
>"mikepapajuliet, on […], maintaining 3000, inbound, receive Golf, request clearance"
>"mikepapajuliet, track direct to […] squak 0261"
>"of courshe"
receive the clearance disturbed but instead of standard phrase of "say again"
>"approach, I've to found out what you told me"
They say it again
>"frequency change approve. Contact tower on […]"
>"[…] tower, mikepapajuliet, I'm not flying so good due to turbulence. Big broken cloud at 2500. Request landing clearance"
>"mikepapajuliet clear to land"
Open the mike for the passengers
>"we are approaching the runway to land at […] airport, the temperature is 27ºc, fasten your seatbelts, thanks for your lot of loyalty towards [company name] follow all the instruction of our flight attendants and remember that smoking on the and is forbidden, we don't want to rise a fire don't we? I'm happy to have been the pilot UUUU on this flight and Have a nice day"
As always I say to my co-pilot/first pilot
>"let's bring it down gently brother, they don't expect a wreckage"
If they watch me weird i just go with
>"nothing, I've said nothing"
Otherwise they just chuckle or smile thinking of a weird joke
When we land and I finish with all the papers to sign off duty I get to the pub asking a beer with CIA pose.
I'm almost there to finally live my dream brothers.
No.90921
>>90919
>I'm almost there to finally live my dream, brothers.
Now all you have to do is crash the plane.
No.90930
>>90921
Do it next time the board crashes.
For us.
No.90946
>>87169
see you at the 120,000 get, brother.
No.93673
>>90946
But he's not the one benefiting…
No.93685
>>93673
On the contrary, Brother is the one who benefits most. He believes the fire is rising due to his martyrdom, and so faces his death with a smile upon his face. Does not every one of us wish to raise the fire? Does not every Brother here not wish to crash with no survivors?
No.93692
>uninitiated friends start saying random bane quotes using empty cans of beer to make themselves sound like him
>join in and do some of his lines from the plane scene
>stealth baneposting
No.93693
>>71493
>CIA pose constantly when talking to residents and coworkers
Its actually beneficial to you since it signifies you're in charge and subconsciously makes you feel like a big guy. I often strike the pose before leaving the bathroom at work.
No.93697
Baneposting got me out of having to beat a guys ass once before. He was pretty small (maybe like 5'5 and 125) I would have felt bad for beating him up considering I'm 6'4 and 265. Anyway
>Be me
>Like 3 months ago
>This manlet is trying to hit on my sister
>She's shooting him down but he persists
>She yells for me to come over
>I come over and she says to him "Would you like to say what you were saying to my boyfriend?"
We do a thing where I pretend to be her boyfriend to try to stop undesirables from hitting on her
>I began talking to her in my well practiced German accent and said "What does this little baby man want from you"
>She says "He was trying to flirt but apparently he doesn't understand what I mean when I say that I have a boyfriend".
>He gets a bit angry so he looks at me and says "You don't look so tough". "What do you think would happen if I punched you right in your stupid fucking face"?
>I bent down to look him in the eyes and said "It would be extremely painful"
>He starts getting cocky and says You're fucking right it would be painf-
>Before he finishes I grabbed him by the back of his jaw and while looking him in the eyes said "For you"
>He's scared at this point and in a bit of pain, so I let him go and stood to my full height before yelling "NOW SIT DOWN PUNY MAN" and violently pushing him onto the ground by the shoulder.
He kinda half sat/laid there for a minute or so while my sister and I walked away and then into a store where she proceeded to start laughing like an idiot.
We got sushi after that.
No.93724
No.93725
>>93697
Why didn't you grab her ass, lift her up and passionately made out with your sister? You didn't play your part well.
No.93731
No.93742
>>93697
>I'm 6'4 and 265
You're a big guy.
No.93746
>>93697
>story doesn't end in incest
>extremely painful
>for you
you're giving me ptsd
No.93757
>>93725
ayyy lmao
I still got a boner
No.93791
>have initiated coworker
>banepost to each other regularly whenever we work together
>other coworkers for some reason don't find this weird
>seem to think it's some manner of inside joke between us, which they're not totally wrong about
>they start saying things like 'for you' in a funny voice and talking about big guys
>they know nothing about what they're referencing
>me and my fellow big guy's face when
No.93813
>>93791
>merely adopting the dark
I hate it when people do that.
No.93821
Or perhaps he's wondering why someone would quote the scene before having seen it.
No.93823
>be me
>Psych 101
>learning about milgram
>subjects of study asked who would be responsible if the other subject dies
>professor says milgram would respond
"I'm in charge here"
>mfw
No.93841
>>93791
>>they know nothing about what they're referencing
Initiate them, brother. Rise the fire.
No.93865
I'm new to full on baneposting (maybe 6 months). So far the only things I have managed are
>assume CIA stance when waiting or standing around
>call others big guy or small guy
>say "for you"
>try and sneak in "initiated" or "uninitiated" when I get the chance
It isn't much but it's all I've thought to do so far that doesn't make me look like an autist irl.
The other day my mom was watching football while I was doing homework and the announcer gets in and says "well yeah, jim, he's a pretty big guy but.." And I laughed kind of loudly and she was like anon wtf. Lots of situations like that but nothing major
No.93866
>>93865
>And I laughed kind of loudly and she was like anon wtf.
Your response should have been:
>Nothing, I said nothing!
No.93935
>change name on youtube through this google accounts bollocks to "Big Guy"
>not realizing this also changed my name on gmail, I send some work-related emails to my lecturers at college
>see one of my lecturers the next day
>"Did you get that work I sent you?" I ask
>"Yes I did." She responds, then turns around.
>"Big Guy."
This was two weeks ago.
She keeps calling me Big Guy every time she sees me.
The worst part is that she isn't even remotely initiated so I can't take it any further.
It's breaking my heart [spoilers]with no survivors[/spoilers].
No.93941
>>93697
>that delivery timing
Priceless.
No.93986
>>93935
Just respond "for you"
She/they probably already think you're autistic
Initiate them with no survivors
No.93998
>>93935
>not having multiple emails for different purposes
It's like this hothead doesn't know how to compartmentalize his life.
No.94031
>>93935
You say it like it's a bad thing.
No.94122
>mfw my wardrobe resembles Bane's more than CIA's but I'm a small guy
what do?
No.94145
>>94122
Get stilts and bulk up. It's the only way for a small guy to become a big guy :^)
No.94148
No.94275
>go to convention
>see guy in Bane costume
>follow him around like a sperg unable to speak to him
>finally ask for a picture
>"of course!"
>can't tell if subtle baneposting or not
>take picture and walk away
how do I stop being autistic
No.94393
>Be me
>Freshman year of college
>Live on specific engineering floor of our dorm
>Guess the school thought we would buddy up and study together since we all had related majors
>Didn't really happen ever
>RA for our floor is an SJW dude
>He's drunken the Kool-Aid hard
>Dorm is split into two halves, the boys half and girls half, each getting an RA of their respective gender
>Our RA, Collin, routinely gives presentations during floor meetings of how we need to promote diversity in engineering
>The female RA nods along but it's clear even she doesn't give a fuck
>RA has a bulletin board that happens to be next to my room in the hall
>Plasters it every month with shit like promoting diversity in engineering, celebrating female and black scientists, etc.
>Getting sick of this shit
>Don't have class on Friday
>Up on Friday at 4
>Nobody's in the hallway
>Decide to spam his shitty board with baneposts
>pic related
>Next floor meeting (I usually duck out of them, we're supposed to go but he can't penalize or force us to, I just lock my door when he comes knocking and pretend I'm not there), surprise, surprise, it's about vandalizing campus equipment
>He asks for someone to come forward
>Nobody does
>A few people are giggling at the absurdity of a Batman character spammed all over his diversity board
>Stifle my giggles so he doesn't suspect me
>Never get caught
>Ends up leaving a month later due to heavy courseload on his part and what he claims was an 'unwelcoming environment'
>Can't make this shit up
>Got a new RA, he was better than Collin
And that's how Bane defeated Political Correctness or something
No.94394
>>94393
>le 9gag army
a masterpiece. Bravo, brother.
No.94397
>>94393
>hothead got out of there
Glad it turned out that way.
No.94407
>>94393
>He asks for someone to come forward
>Nobody does
So you said nothing?
No.94410
>>94407
NOTHING, HE SAID NOTHING!!
No.94782
This thread deserves a bump.
No.94803
>>94393
BRAVO BROTHER
R
A
V
O
B
R
O
T
H
E
R
No.94831
>>87216
I'm waiting for the day they track one back to us after they make the fire rise.
No.94835
No.94911
I own my own real estate LLC.
>Be starting out
>Get first house
>1 story 2 bed 1.5 bathrooms
>giant living area and a clubhouse
>Take client into house
>"Wow when I was looking at this the house looked pretty small, but on the inside this is a pretty big house."
>"Yeah, its a pretty big house, for you."
>Close the deal
>Sell the house
>Make 25 grand profit off the house
Felt so good man
No.95192
>>94911
Who said that baneposting couldn't boost your chances in the professional world?
Hotheads, that's who.
No.95199
>>94911
You're a rich guy!
No.95201
I routinely annoy my brother with baneposting constantly while I'm around him. He's a hothead. He thinks baneposting is stupid. My parent's just think I'm mentally ill.
I have a big anxiety problem, so I've been trying to perfect CIA's stance as a way to work through it. By default my CIA pose doesn't look right, because I'm used to fearful body language, but my in-depth knowledge of the stance makes it easier for me to look more authentic. I practice the pose in the mirror regularly. I think it is helping me become more confident in public. Baneposting is changing my life!
No.95215
>>94911
That's a big profit!
No.95217
>>95201
Are you me?
If you're not me, than give yourself a pat on the back
No.95218
>>94911
So basically that person may have rejected another offer in favor of yours. Did the transaction include a briefcase exchange ?
Be careful around planes, brother. Just saying.
No.95488
>>95218
Don't wear blue jackets and cargo pants, and don't have anything to do with government agencies.
No.95766
B O V A R B
R V
A A
V R
O V A R B R A V O
R V
A A
V R
B R A V O B
No.95767
>>94393
When will these identity fags figure out that it doesn't matter who you are, rather than your plan?
No.95786
>Me 'n friend play EU4
>Both banepost every now and then
>I figure out the next step to my masterplan
>"You know, about these mercenaries"
>"It's interesting how they never abandon you despite you basically sending them to suicide missions"
>"Like, let's say just one survives out of a thousand and still that army is in your command"
>A LOTTA LOYALTY FOR A HIRED GUN
No.95787
>>94393
This is so fucking good
No.95796
>living with my 2 cousins.
>one of them studies in medical faculty.
>saw him wearing doctor's coat,mask, etc.
>assuming CIA stance
>Hi doctor [cousin], im CIA.
>gives me 'What?' face.
>Tell me why do you wear the mask?
>he implies because of stuffs, etc.
>he is tall like 1.90 cm
>You are a big guy.
>he says 'for you'.
>surprisemotherfucker.jpg
>he already knew about baneposting.
>he really got me.
>he contunied Congratulations, you got yourself caught.
>What is the next part of your master plan?
>seeing the chocolate that he is gonna eat.
>crashing this chocolate with no hazelnuts!
>other cousin in the next room who has no idea about anything, yells very loudly what are you babbling about?
>saying Nothing, I said nothing! at the same time.
>laughed a lot after that.
>"They expect one of us in the wreckage, brother." after saying that i left the home for my own stuff.
No.95817
No.96295
>>95812
>those dubs on the price
Meme magic is warping reality to a dangerous extent. It may get to a point where we wouldn't be able to contain it.
No.96497
>>87169
>>90919
Brother, bane is dieing, we need you to.. take one for the team
No.96498
>>90919
You have made us all proud big guy.
No.96501
>>96497
No we're not, quit trying to get your fellow big guys vanned.
No.96545
>>96497
Saturday, 12th of December 2015.
Make the fire rise.
No.96590
>>96295
I thought all prizes are dubs? At least it's like that in Germany.
No.98204
>at work
>have to load a truck
>the trunk smells like rotting meat
>almost puke
>ask for a face mask
>I'm already giggling in my mind
>I'm already baneposting on a level I've never done before in my mind
>handed a mask and strap it on
>"no one cared who I was till I put on the mask!"
>what was that anon?
>nothing! I said Nothing!
>finish loading the truck
>truck diver tips me
>still have mask on
>sorry about the smell, what was your name?
>"it don't matter who we are, what matters is the job."
>heh, your're a funny one, guy. I liked that movie
>Get's in his truck and drives off
>take the mask off and the stap snaps and hits my face
> it was very painful
No.98259
>>98204
I've been waiting for someone to get the reference. Good to know it happens sometimes.
No.98311
>>98204
>heh, your're a funny one, guy. I liked that movie
No.98653
>>98259
>>98311
anytime we use the forklift to load shit I say "The forklift rises!"
and anytime someone says "This is a big order." I say "for you."
The supervisor took that to mean I have such good work ethic that big orders for most mean noting for me.
I'm going to banepost tillI get a raise.
No.98769
>>71493
>nursing homes suddenly experience an influx of big guy applicants
No.98770
>>98653
>I'm going to banepost tillI get a raise.
Yesh ! The salary rises !
Or alternatively: calm down colleague, now is not the time for a raise. That comes later.
No.99105
>be baneposting for 3 years
>started my senior year of high school
I really only have two stories worth mentioning, first one is kind of embarassing but the other is solid.
>people were asking for sign ups for meme club
>you heard that right, meme club (it had been going on for about 3 years)
>join it because I wanted to see how cringeworthy it was
>first day, they want to take yearbook pictures (since half of the club drops out of it after the first meeting, every time)
>go out into the hallway
>"okay everyone make a pose"
>this is my moment
>pic related
other one
>be in social media studies
>pretty much an easy A class
>share same computers as yearbook club
>bored one day and not listening to lecture
>go through the files to see if there's any yearbook stories
>one girl had a stroke
>fix it up to include baneposting references
unfortunately it was cut from the yearbook, but it was still fun.
No.99106
>>99105
And here's a picture of the article.
No.99117
>>99105
>willingly having your picture taken with cancer
nice power stance though, not bad
No.99181
No.99240
>>99105
>actually posting that pic on 8chan.
He did it! The absolute madman!
No.99242
>>99105
>>people were asking for sign ups for meme club
No.99252
No.99327
>>99105
The bigness is strong in this one.
Keep working on this power stance. Crash this cancer with no survivor. Make the fire rise eternal.
No.100405
So I introduced my gf to baneposting and I must say, she's picked it up quite well.
The only problem is this…
Every time we have sex she calls me a big guy.
I respond FOR YOUU, of courshe.
It was great the first 15 times… now she won't stop.
It's almost getting to be too much for me, idk guys.
Maybe I'm just being a hot head, but I hope that me being a big guy doesn't make her a small guy by default, wouldn't that be gay?
No.100407
>>100405
Calm down, brother. You have to be a big guy for her, so don't let your head get hot. Perhaps she just needs to get most of it out of her system. Dress her like CIA, act out the plane scene, and fuck her brains out. If that's still not enough, show her your /bane/ folder. Once she's satisfied, send her here so she can continue rising the fire as needed, and banepost with you more naturally over time, as opposed to all at once which might crash your relationship with no survivors.
No.100410
>>100405
Good job making the fire rise, big guy.
No.100481
>Running a Call of Cthulhu tabletop with a hothead and a big guy
>The hothead's character is off doing something
>Big guy says he'll power-stance at the trainstation while he waits to get a few laughs out of me
>As hothead's character arrives he asks if he sees anyone else near big guy's character
>"Yeah, there's an older looking man with brown-ish hair and a big nose, he's obviously not American and he's only just showed up"
>Big guy says he'll walk over and introduce himself
>The older man walks up to him before he has a chance to move and says "I'm Doctor Pavel, are you CIA"
>He instantly loses his shit
>Doctor Pavel gestures to hothead's character "Uh, I was told I don't get to bring friends"
>Big guy's losing it
>The hothead's getting angry we're not taking it seriously anymore
>Train rolls in
>Big Guy stops laughing and says "Get him onboard, I'll call it in"
>We're both almost in tears
>A small-time villain who isnt aware they know about him just happens to be on the train
>Big Guy's character approaches behind him and signals for hothead's character to throw him a gun
>Hothead fucks up the roll
>"Yeah, it didn't fly so good"
>We're both back in tears
>"Can one of the other people here throw me the gun?"
>"Nah, they have a lotta loyalty for some hired passangers"
>"Perhaps they're just wondering what kind of man shoot's someone before throwing them out of a train"
>Villain realises big guy's character is behind him
>"Don't move"
>"Atleast you can talk, who are you?"
>"It doesn't matter who we are, what matters is our plan"
>"Was getting caught part of your plan?"
>"Of course!"
>"Well congratulations, you got yourselves caught, now what's the next step of your masterplan?"
>"Crashing this train with no survivors"
And that's how bainposting ruined a perfectly good tabletop game
No.100499
No.100656
>>95192
honestly baneposting has given me nothing but success
No.100657
>>100481
>ruined
Sounds like a great time to me, brother
No.100663
>>93986
this honestly. Go full bore, you got nothing to lose and everything to gain
No.100664
>>93935
Initiate them, brother. Initiate them with every rising flame of passion in your heart.
No.100721
>Folks are renting out this house
>people don't pay rent
>if we let them have it the governments way they'd be there for 3 months
>dad makes this plan to scare them
>I go with my dad pretending to be an agent from the bank inspecting the house
>say we're repossessing the house because the owners (my parents) haven't been making their payments
>tell them in a month we're coming to take the house so they need to get all their stuff cleared out
>angry nigger cuban who wasn't even on the lease gets in my face
>tell them that next time I come I'm bringing my "big guys"
>he says he's a big guy too
>he was barely 5'6"
= epilogue =
>nigger cuban gets run over while riding a bike 2 months after this
>dies
>he didn't ride so good
No.100765
>playing magic at LGS
>opponent plays pic related
>"A lot of loyalty for a 4-drop"
No.100795
>>100721
Meme magic kills those that merely adopt being a big guy. You were born into it molded by it.
No.100797
When will you dumbasses, err sorry "hotheads", learn? This board is dying. Only through Sheev can you achieve a power great enough to save this board, from certain death.
Convert to Sheevposting, I beg you. You have great wisdom. Learn the power of Sheevposting. Learn the power to save /bane/
No.100799
>watching basketball
>color commentator remarks that the center is unusually tall
>brother says "Dang, he's a big guy"
>I saw "For you"
>he leaves the room
It sucks be related to the uninitiated.
No.100809
>>100797
Fuck outta here hothead. and where dat DWP boy at?
No.100811
>>100797
SOMEBODY GET THIS HOTHEAD OUT OF HERE.
No.100853
>Be me
>Go to vo-tech school in a computers course
>A guy keeps quoting Bane with fairly good impression throughout a break
>Here's my chance
>"You're a big guy"
>Everyone laughs, clearly nobody there is initiated
>Guy says "thank you" in a questioning way, clearly overtaken by my vocal acceptance of his big guy status
I've also tried many times to acknowledge others' bigness when quotes of CIA Rises come up, however no one in class in initiated.
No.100870
>tfw english is not my country's language
>tfw can't banepost IRL effectively
any other brother knows this feel?
No.100892
>>100853
It hurts. But I'm sure it'll just make it that much better when you do come across another big guy.
No.100893
>>100797
>board about baneposting
>will be saved by quitting baneposting
I know you're trolling but this is the weakest shit I've ever read
No.101256
> chatting with friends
> one friend mentions a 'big surprise'
> 'for you', I says
> he misunderstands
> thinks I'm implying that he's stupid
>mfw
No.101277
>>99105
>marilyn manson shirt
>no scars
Found the 9gag.
No.101337
>>99105
Why is your hair blue?
No.101659
No.101713
>>101658
Your mom was only suspicious of your autism before. Now she knows
No.101744
>>99105
>endured the cancer for an opportunity to banepost
One of the biggest guys here
No.101806
>>100765
>play RDW
>only play red burns
>raise the fire
I haven't played in years I have no idea if RDW is still a thing in magic or not.
No.102095
> Watching association football with my friends
> One of the players on our team is described as a 'big lad' by a pundit
> 'for you'
> One of my friends is somewhat initiated
> he lols
> mfw
No.102120
>>94393
you absolute madman
No.102147
>>94393
I love confirmed content.
No.102388
https://archive.is/EaffI
Archived.
Merry Christmas, Brothers.
No.102566
>be me at disneyland
>walking around chilling
>see this sign
>bust out laughing
bravo nolan
No.102653
>>102566
BRAVO
R
A
V
O
NOLAN
O
L
A
N
No.102702
>coming home
>i can hear extremely loud music
>open door
>my brother is fucking his GF
>"WAS GETTING CAUGHT PART OF YOUR PLAN"
>i unplug the speakers and go to my room giggling like a little girl
>he stops talking to me
No.102703
No.102706
Also
>friend forms a band with me, his sister and other hotheads i had no idea they existed
>turns out they wanted to play crappy metalcore
>the one and only time we played on a venue i would scream dialogue off the plane scene
>show ends
>an acne ridden angsty teen approaches me
>"wow, those lyrics are quite deep dude"
>we broke up a week later when they found out i was spreading nolan's word through my screams
Never join your friend's shitty band for sympathy, they need to rename their band to "the hotheads"
No.102707
>>102702
> 'extremely loud'
For you
No.102710
>>102706
>an acne ridden angsty teen approaches me
>"wow, those lyrics are quite deep dude"
kek
No.102711
>>102706
lol what all did you say
No.104790
No.105548
>>93697
Can someone screencap this?
No.105569
>>90690
I've returned
>tag is still Big Guy
>school has a team for TMG (college crew battle tournament)
>first meeting of the semester
>everyone there either uses reddit or cuckchan, one is probably uses tumblr (constantly compares Fox and Falco to "white privilege")
>only one true brother who knows why I call myself Big Guy
>matches are being called
>"and ___ vs. Big Guy"
>hear someone go "oh like the meme?"
>"haha I bet it will be extremely painful for him"
>mfw
I've made a mistake.
I'm sorry brothers.
No.105572
>>105569
You need to crash that play with no survivors.
No.105670
>>100797
One of us has to be found in the wreckage brother.
No.105714