/celibacy/ - Celibacy

>>166
Random hookup. Felt empty. Not as good as sex I had with an ex. Decided to only have sex with a girl I truly like. Stopped fapping because I want to escape the modern world's mind control through bread and circus.

>>166
I'm a 20 years old virgin /pol/ack, simply disgusted by this world. I want to destroy it, to build a new one. For this end, I want to create a new ideology. But I'm a lazy person, and I just don't have the energy to read through dozens of book. So, I hope it'll change after a while.
I've just started it, and failed after some 3 weeks, but tonight I'll start it again.

>>191
>simply disgusted by this world. I want to destroy it, to build a new one. For this end, I want to create a new ideology

No to derail the thread but you're not the only one. I am on a similar path myself, the iron pill reading list is a great place to start and ideally it should be all we need, of course the more you broaden your horizons the better.

>>203
>considering a monastic vocation

I've also thought about this, but >tfw no faith

>>166
I want to free my mind of thoughts that I did not choose to have. Sexual thoughts and feelings, for me, occur involuntarily.
It is my belief that the upper mind should be the sole master of the body and itself.

While for me it wasn't much of a choice, I kind of like the idea anyway. To be honest relationships are too complex and put me off. I prefer my life to be simple and like the cliche goes, I'm a man of simple pleasures.

While I would not give up masturbation, I would consider it unhealthy not to have any kind of sexual activity. Isn't it bad for your mental health long-term?

I not religious. I just find sex to be more detrimental than beneficial to my everyday life.

It might sound immature and dumb, but I'm waiting for the right person, even though I'm not really religious or anything. I think in some ways I'm really scared about sex. Or maybe I'm just scared about making a mistake and sharing something special and intimate with the wrong person.

Either way I'm really disgusted by sex and porn and masturbation and things like that, because I think it should be something special. But I feel like I'm never going to find the right person, who actually agrees with my views and who I share interests with and who loves me. Sigh

Want the mental clarity that comes from not being sexually exhausted. Also, I'm a little nutty and hate the physical compulsion to act in a way that isn't a pure expression of the will - sex is absurd. Also my mind is horribly riddled with religious paradox.

>>283
That used to be a part of my reasoning but I'm more cynical now. Don't give up.

>>283
That isn't immature at all.

>>283
don't be ashamed of this, i am the same way brother. i had quite a few girls try to seduce me into sex, but overtime i just felt extreme loneliness, like they didn't care about anything except the sex and i was just a toy to them. masterbation is just a sick guilty shadow of the act. i basically feel as though i'd only like to have sex with somebody that i had emotional attachments for and they had the same for me. if this situation never develops so be it. since i've quit chronic masterbation and porn even the sight of a beautiful woman makes me happy often in a non-sexual way. I feel an intense overpowering feeling of joy and cocky aggression. having discipline has become my new hobby, and i would only relinquish it ideally for a good reason. from continence i finally learned how much i truly love and cherish women , i no longer look down on them and hate them and feel spite for them, i am light as a feather and i make them smile. good luck to all here

For me, after spending enough time on /pol/, I realized that trying to change society in any major way is pretty futile in the modern world, because in a democracy the herded masses will always dramatically outnumber those who really question the world outside what mainstream media and state education tells them.

Not only that, but we sterilize the world if we keep turning it into something to be solved, rather than something to be lived. I feel we should focus on inner meaning, local community, and being the change we want in the world, rather than wasting our lives arguing over theory.

That's how I got here. I find it ridiculous to preach/demand traditional/conservative values and not live by them yourself, so I want to lead by example. That means being a good, moral person, and part of that is to take control of immoral desires of lust.

My hope is that the inner meaning will be enough of a reward in itself however, regardless of whether I convince people to live by my example.

>>522

But can you objectively prove that desires of lust are immoral?

If no, then you cannot know that they are immoral, and moreso, you cannot claim that they are immoral because they are likely NOT immoral.

Meaning you've created and artificial construct that you view as negative for absolutely no proven reason at all.

You are wasting you life on made up beliefs. How do you feel about this?

I'm a christian - born and raised (and calvanist for those who want to know).

I've always held that I was not to have sex until marriage, and I've kept by that. It seems as of recent events that I may keep my virginity for longer than that - not due to lack of relationship though, but because my current partner is an asexual, and we've had discussions on this that have lead more or less to 'If it happens then it happens then but we shouldn't dwell to much until marriage.' which is damn good advice

I've also given thought to studying at a seminary and would like to spend some time in a monastery but I doubt there are many monasteries that would accept a protestant such as myself.

>>525

>But can you objectively prove that desires of lust are immoral?

That depends on your views towards God.

If you do not believe in God, then no aspect of morality can be objectively "proven" as you have no objective reference point to base it upon.

Whereas I personally lean towards theism so God is my objective reference point. He is omniscient so he cannot be wrong. That is why his teachings on morality must be objectively true - and he teaches abstinence, restraint, and celibacy so it follows that they must be true.

Please do not misunderstand me - I am not one of these people that believes atheists cannot be moral - in fact many atheists are more moral than theists in practice, but you can't possibly have *objective* morality without God as an objective reference point. Only ever pros and cons.

In any case - regardless of whether it is objectively moral or immoral - restraint has all kinds of practical benefits, such as giving confidence in your own strength of will, freedom from addiction, more free time, better health (mental and physical), the experience to help others, and a generally cleaner view on life (i.e not seeing people under the veil of some porn-inspired perversion for example, or applying porn star standards to real women). The challenge can be a reward in itself really though.

It's not for everyone, I understand that, and I don't mean to sound rude - but I think you should keep your negativity away from here as it can discourage people from succeeding. Ideally we an encouraging environment where we all help push each other to keep going.

This anons story? The celibacy came before the religion. I realized early on - observing others who were less temperate - that whores/whoring are a sure path to destruction. Since then, with the decline in balanced traditional relationships, it's become all the easier to avoid the filthy cup altogether.

I'm not aiming for permanent celibacy but baring an extraordinary - and thus unanticipated - event I am not changing my position until marriage has occurred.

I guess I got really indulgent here.

I used to want to be a slut and spread happiness everywhere, but when I was 16, I saw an anime which changed my life, called Revolutionary Girl Utena, where the protagonist faintly remembers a prince giving her a ring and how she wants to marry that prince. I thought it was so cool how she had these principles and I wanted to be like that. The story's aim was probably actually to break that kind of thinking but too bad. From then on, if I were to have a first love, I wanted them to be ideal, so I didn't want to 'officiate' my first relationship unless I could confirm it could be my last. But I'm also gay, and the idea of, for instance, waiting a year before putting out is ridiculous to other gay men.

I met someone I was interested in in college, but he dropped out and moved, so we talked online for about two years (we never officiated a relationship in any sense, though) with the promise that he'd come back some day. As that prospect became more distant, I realized a few things that helped me become celibate:

1) The way I act while I like someone is very unhealthy– worrying about whether they like me, worrying about other people trying to get in their pants, archiving their entire internet footprint…

2) I look down people who base their personality on their sex life, especially other gay people who can't shut up about grindr (the guy I was talking to became this). I want to be unable to relate to these people and stay alienated from them. What can I say? I enjoy looking down on people more than sex. (there's actually a couple more things like drinking that I won't do for the same reasons)

3) Part of my ideal is that my ideal other holds the same ideals. The expectation others to want their 'first love' to be 'their last' developed into a purity complex– If someone failed, they were scarred. He was nothing close to the ideal I was looking for, and as I get older, the pool of gay virgins shrinks a lot. But I love myself and I want to be my ideal, so I want to protect my innocence, even when I'm no longer cute, even if I can find that significant other.

I still jack off though. Would like to downsize on that but I have no big reason. I've only been celibate for close to a year now and I'm confident in doing it for life, as I've done other things like choosing to be straight edge for close to ten years, but I worry about regretting it when I'm too old for a normal relationship.