Moving at a brisk pace rather than the slow shuffle usually associated with the undead of Egypt, Tanis made her way into class and found her desk a good five minutes before the morning bell. Elsa and Sibella were waiting for her there, the older teens enjoying some light conversation amid the low chatter of the classroom. Tanis always preferred to have a little time for gossip before lessons began, but today her attention was immediately seized by the unusual change of scenery adorning the classroom walls.
“Hey Elsa, what’s with all the hearts?” Tanis asked innocently of her classmate. Elsa quirked an eyebrow at the interruption but gave the most straightforward answer that she could.
“A body as large as mein requires enhanced oxygenation of the tissues to combat lethargy und maintain peak cognitive faculties. Given my generous frame, a multi-heart circulatory system was deemed more efficient zhan–”
“I think she’s talking about the Valentine’s decorations, Elsa,” Sibella interjected politely, gesturing to the dozen cartoon hearts made of lace and pink construction paper that had been stapled up around the classroom. “It’s just a yearly holiday tradition,” Sibella explained, turning her attention to her young mummy friend.
“Another one? We just finished celebrating winter solstice, the death of the previous year, and the coronation of the King Martin Luther,” Tanis complained wearily. “I’m kinda burned out on all the shopping and feasting and dressing up. So, what’s this holiday about?”
Sibella leaned in close and treated Tanis to a smug, fang-baring smile. “Valentine’s Day is when the boys get romantic.”
Tanis’s eyes widened. Her frown dropped away, replaced with an astonished open-mouth gape. “Go on…”
“The tradition begins with passing out cards or notes, mainly to your biggest crush. Boys are usually terrified of telling a girl that they’re interested on them out loud, so writing it down instead seems to help.”
“Cowards!” Elsa commented from her desk. “If a male desires to breed he should haff ze spine to march oop und tell you to your face. And zhen be harshly slapped for DARING to presume that I would waste mein time mingling genetic material vhen I am perfectly capable of creating life on mein own.”
“Elsa has never really gotten the hang of flirting,” Sibella said as excuse for her, respectfully lowering her voice. “Her last attempt at a Valentine had an actual human heart stapled to the card.”
“Eet vas supposed to be EIN PUN!” Elsa groused. “Eet’s not mein fault squeamish human boys cannot grasp superior anatomical comedy.”
“Uhm, so what should I do?” Tanis asked, not wanting her first efforts at romance to crash and burn as Elsa’s had.
“Well that depends Tanis, are there any boys you know that are, erm, ‘special’ to you?” Sibella asked. Tanis managed a confused pout under her wrappings.
“Special?”
“Yes, you knoooow… A crush. A sweetheart. A boy you like being around, who makes you feel good about yourself and treats you nicely and maybe he brings you gifts, and you feel like you have butterflies in your belly if you hold his hand…?”
“Hmmm,” Tanis pondered, “I thought I felt that once, but when I checked inside my chest cavity it turned out it was actually a nest of gypsy moths in my lungs.”
“That’d be a ‘no’, then,” Sibella surmised.
"Not to worry Tanis. If you haven't got anyone particular on your mind, that just means you're free to play the field! Believe me, there's nothing more fun than picking through the boys and sorting the duds from the keepers," Sibella informed Tanis, making the mummy's smile grow brighter by the second.
"Will you help me find a real cute one Sibella?"
"Of course! The ladies of House Dracula have always had excellent TASTE in men," Sibella boasted, her fangs gleaming. Sibella sighed briefly, her eyes glazing as she reached into her notebook and pulled out a photograph of her beau. "Of course my advice will be purely academic, seeing as I'm going steady with Cadet Roper now. I can't wait to see what special plans he's made for us on our outing tonight!"
"Goooood morning students!" Miss Grimwood called out in the singsong voice she tended to use when in a good mood. And usually when she was in a good mood, it meant she'd been on the line with Colonel Calloway at the boy's school down the street.
Winnie and Phantasma rushed into the room and dashed to their seats, parking their butts in their chairs just in time to take the morning attendance. “Good morning Miss Grimwood!” The two tardy teens recited in tandem, smiling perfect angelic smiles to hide their near absenteeism.