>>230500
here is the thing, you have no obligation to the preservation of his marriage. he does. you hitting on him is not a bad thing, you are after all an unaffiliated 3rd party. he on the other hand has a wife, and as long as he is married to her, he has an obligation to his vows, as does his wife. now, if you ask him and he says no, you stop asking him. he said no, and that is that. is it a scumbag move to be a homewrecker? yes. if he at some point in the future leaves his wife and decides he wants you, that is fine. but leave that up to him. remember, in the end you have to ask yourself, "am i ok with making him risk divorce". if you can live with that, go ahead and ask away.