No.247701
I really want to get a dildo or a butt plug (depending on price) and there are 3 sex shops that are just half hour away from me but every time Im about to go I just stand back.
I dont know I feel somehow ashamed but I just cant get past the idea of me, a fat fuck with nerdy glasses asking for a sex toy.
I have always been unsure of pretty much everything but hell this feels like another level
How was your first experience with buying toys guys? I really need some advice
No.247712
No.247717
>>247712
I dont want a mailman to come to my house holding a plastic dick. I mean, my family could see it and shit
No.247726
>>247717
believe it or not, but mail comes in these magical opaque things called boxes
No.247736
Oh you probably have it easier than me anyways, people often think i'm underage and i might get asked for an ID, laughed at or treated like a kid, that would be quite embarrassing.
No.247791
>>247736
Actually kind of hot tbh.
No.247796
>>247726
Venezuela can't afford boxes.
No.247802
No.247804
>>247802
Uhmm so right off the bat!, l-lewd.
I-i don't think i am that cute and well i'm also a virgin.
No.247806
>>247804
I was kidding.
I'm surprised there is someone from Uruguay here. Considering that I hardly have seen ones in 4chan itself.
No.247809
>>247806
I'm surprised too, i thought that i was the only one.
No.247812
>>247809
i'm from uruguay too, but i'm too lazy to write, so i just watch
No.247813
>>247812
So there are 3 fags of Uruguay here?
Unsurprisingly the meme is true huh.
Kind of ironic.
No.247814
>>247813
Yeah it's weird, i saw a lot of edgy uruguayan teens using 4chan, and posting shit from 4chan on facebook. At least 8chan isn't shit
No.247816
>>247814
>Posting 4chan shit on facebook
What the fuck, I use both 4chan and 8chan, but that's beyond retarded.
No.247821
>>247814
4chan is dead, there's no need to go there anymore.
No.247822
>>247816
es mas facil si te lo digo en español, son de estos pajeros que generalmente te encontras en la intendecia, que recien ahora descubrieron los memes ironicos y se hacen los superados
No.247823
>>247821
i don't go there, they screencap what they find and write shit like " Mira lo que encontre :v" it's fucking cancer
No.247829
>>247823
Uf ya se de cuales, literalmente cancer
No.247831
>>247823
>>247822
Ho boy, I hate those.
No.247833
File: 1456200888074.png (501.55 KB, 848x1200, 53:75, tumblr_nd2ocl9C6b1tw5a72o1….png)
>>247717
Ding dong, this is the mail man. I'm down here holding your bright purple, medium firmness, extra-veiny silicone phallus for shoving into your gay asshole. I accidentally got your apartment number mixed up and visited the families who live above and below you, so they all know that you're going to be shoving this giant purple dick up your ass. Sorry about that, sir. Now please open up so I can come upstairs and look you in the eye while I hand you your anal sex toy which you bought to use on yourself. Can't wait to get home for the weekend and talk to my girlfriend about how I delivered a giant dick to you personally.
No.247879
>>247717
Like the other guy said, it comes in a box. Just make sure your mum doesn't snag it and open it before you do.
But trust me, mailmen don't care. They're like those guys at the xray machines at airports. Unless it's a bomb, they don't give a fuck.
No.247892
>>247701
>I dont know I feel somehow ashamed but I just cant get past the idea of me, a fat fuck with nerdy glasses asking for a sex toy.
SPOILER: The guy works in a fucking sex shop. It is literally his job to selling huge rubber horsecocks to people, so he'd probably welcome a break from sex weirdos and creepers to deal with some normal guy wanting a silicone dildo and info on what lube he should use on it. For the curious, silicone lubricant reacts with and damages silicone toys, so only use water based and hybrid (water and silicone based) lubes.
>>247833
>MFW
10/10
No.247895
No.247903
The first thing I bought was a vibrating butt plug. At the checkout they took it out of the box and turned it on to make sure it worked, since they don't take returns on these things. My eyes were just bugging out from embarrassment.
You just gotta remember that even if you're dying of embarrassment, these people work in a sex shop. It's all normal for them, they aren't judging you.
All that said, it's significantly cheaper for me to just order shit online. Your only potential concerns there should be how it shows up on the credit card bill, and any family members intercepting/questioning the delivery.
No.247911
>>247903 has the right idea, OP.
>how it shows up on the credit card bill
Don't just go for a trustworthy online company, find one that boasts about confidentiality. The good ones usually use bland names for actual trade to dismiss prying dickheads, I know from experience that Love Honey is "LH Trading Ltd" and Uberkinky is "NE Services Ltd" or something.
>and any family members intercepting/questioning the delivery.
Aim for daytime delivery (i.e. get any kind if your deliveries come at earlier times, super expensive if you want it delivered ASAP so it doesn't turn up on the evening). Choose a day you have off when people will be at work, that way you don't have to answer the inevitable questions plus you have the privacy to fuck around straight away.
No.247917
OP here
I finally man up and went to a sex shop. The first thing I saw was a wall with around 100 vibrators, dildos, buttplugs and such. The workers were actually very polite, they had this emotionless face that every shop worker has and I didnt need a silly excuse to buy a dildo.
Every single thing in the shop was expensive as fuck but I think it makes sense because all of it is bought in other countries and there is demand.
I ended up buying the cheapest toy in the store (pic related) and Im amazed by the realism. I didnt know it would so real, its hard as an erect dick, has all the factions of a dick, hell it even as the pee hole. I have yet to try it anally but already tried it with my mouth and its great. The biggest downside is the smell, I guess its cheap silicone
Thanks for your help guys, I guess it was just unconditional fear
No.247920
>>247917
If it's a cheap one, it's probably pvc, not silicone. That would explain the smell.
PVC, especially the cheap stuff, can be made with hazardous chemicals. If it starts burning your skin or butt, make sure you wash yourself thoroughly and put a condom over it if you must use it again.
No.247941
>>247917
>>247920
I have a pricey silicone toy, and it smelled for quite a while until I used it and cleaned it several times. Using a fresh smelling soap seems to help a lot.
No.248065
No.248183
I tried going to a sex shop once, but they thought my ID was fake and wouldn't let me in.
What's a good place to buy online?
No.248303
>>248183
I have heard good stuff about Amazon
No.248305
No.248310
>>248305
Mainly Used For Walking on Tumblr
No.248312
>>248303
amazon is good if you live in america or uk, otherwise the tax and shit will add up
for felles norskgutter anbefaler jeg sinful.no
No.248315
>>248310
Would be one of the best if it wasn't for those manly arms and hands.
No.248318
>>248183
I've ordered from pinkcherry.ca before and everything went well.
I'm considering Amazon in the future. If you buy something on Amazon from a non-amazon seller, does it still show up as amazon on the credit card bill?
No.248325
The worker(s) won't give a fuck.
No.248327
>>248310
thank you, I jacked off for two hours straight instead of working and am now onto round two.
No.248333
all these underage guys and low self esteem pussies…. i went into an sex store when i was 16 and bought a dildo+lube.
No.248675
I went shopping yesterday <3
Already tried the massager and the black plug they were amazing
But for some reason I can't get the beads in
No.248687
>>248675
You must have a really tight delicious asshole.
No.248688
>>248687
delicious I wouldn't know, I really dislike my hole
as for tight, fuck yeah, everything up there hurts unless I use a shitton of lube
No.251273
>>247917
Buen trabajo OP. Ahora, grabate usandolo.
No.251719
Uruguay
More like Ur all gay
lmao
No.251851
>>251719
Bit severely late there.
>>248065
No.251853
Don't worry OP, they come in transparent bags so everyone can see your order of giant cock while Mister UPS man looks at your face with disgust.