Shinobutch the Strong
Q
Shinobutch pulls her Heartunder blade from the shadows, providing +10/25/38/50 attack damage for 5 seconds.
W
Passive. Shinobutch walks the shadows. Anywhere there is a shadow on the map, Shinobutch may emerge at that location for 1/3/5/7 seconds, before returning to whence she came. Disabled by wards/vision.
E
Shinobutch lays out a bed on the field and seduces enemies onto it. This is a taunt ability that only affects strong male characters. Once on the bed, she asks "What are we going to do on the bed Onichan?", and then SLAMS the opponents for critical damage and a slow.
100/200/300/400 damage and 10%/20%/30%/40% slow for 3 seconds.
R
Shinobutch activates her ultimate Vampiric form, with subability: Bite. Any player Shinobutch Bites down on automatically becomes her servant, and comes under her control for 3/6/9 seconds. Also adds curvy hips and breasts to Shinobutch for brief period of time, which slow Shinobutch's movement speed for 100, but increase each of her attributes by +10/+20/+30.
Seriously, Dota 2 NEEDS a loli character. It is ridiculous that every other demographic is pandered to except loliologists. LoL already has it, so I don't know what they're waiting for.