>>66793
Depression is like sitting at the bottom of a 1 foot diameter, 8 feet deep muddy pit, gazing up at the tiny hole that seems so distant at that moment. You fell down and your body hurts all over and you can’t move because it’s a chore and a pain for you.
People outside run around carefree in this beautiful meadow, and when one of them notices the sobbing and then looking down your tiny hole they ask: “Why are you sitting down there?” and you reply “I can’t get out. It’s just impossible.” They frown and say “What the fuck, dude? It’s just a small pit! C’mon, get off your ass and climb out already! Don’t you wanna be out here in this beautiful meadow?”
But you’re curled up so low and hurting so much and you’re even beginning to starve now. The guy outside gets the idea that they could lure you out, so they show you their sandwich: “Hey dude, you’re hungry, right? See this awesome sandwich? Here, come on out and get it!”
Of course it’s too high from your perspective, so you reply: “Fuck you, man. You’re just mocking me. It’s just a fucking sandwich anyway, I won’t strain myself for that shit.”
Ooh… now they’re getting angry: “Look at me! I’ve lost a leg in Vietnam! You think you hurt, motherfucker!? I lost MY BALLS there! You think you’re worse off? Huh?” and you no longer reply. That dickhead just can’t understand, that it’s not what they can do, it’s what you CAN’T. They didn’t siege the forest crawling on their bloody stumps back then either, did they?
And you’re literally only a FEW FEET away from EVERYTHING GOOD. It’s just that you can’t see any of it… there is no meadow. All you see is some insignificant blue stain far above your head… maybe a stupid sandwich that your “friend” keeps teasing you with. And it’s just another fucking knife turned in your fucking guts, and it all just makes you wanna hide away even deeper into the lonely darkness of the abyss.
If this is all too familiar to you, all I can say is that you must remember that it’s actually just a very tiny hole, and you’re only hurting from the fall, and you had a concussion, and can’t remember the meadow. It’s only natural that you’re like that. But you only have to endure and eventually you’ll regain your strength and will and crawl back out, and return to enjoy your life.
And to anyone who wants to help someone in a hole: It’s enough if you’re there. It’s enough if they can reach out to you so you can tell them that it’s okay, that you’re still around, that you can just accept the pathetic state they’re in.
Because it’s okay to feel miserable sometimes. It’s okay to cry out all the poison.