Spider problems

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File: 1458023690279.png (297.1 KB, 500x333, 500:333, 938BAB08-CC5A-4CE2-908B-AC….png)

Spider problems Anonymous 03/15/16 (Tue) 06:34:49 No.511273

>be a spider

>be as nice as possible

>provide others with nice silk garments

>everyone hates me

what am i doing wrong

Anonymous 03/15/16 (Tue) 06:48:21 No.511282

"Look, I made you a shirt from what came out my ass."

"GET OUT OF MY HOUSE"

Solution: Don't go into people's houses without their permission.

Anonymous 03/15/16 (Tue) 06:51:46 No.511283

>>511282

But, how else can I give them things?

Anonymous 03/15/16 (Tue) 07:13:08 No.511288

>what am i doing wrong

Let's start by lying to people and pretending to be a silkworm. Perhaps stop doing that?

Anonymous 03/15/16 (Tue) 07:20:51 No.511293

I want to smooch OP on his chelicerae then suck the cum straight out of his engorged pedipalps :3c

Anonymous 03/15/16 (Tue) 10:35:10 No.511338

>>511293

L-lewd~

Anonymous 03/15/16 (Tue) 10:43:43 No.511341

>>511288

silk can't stop a bullet. spiderbro wan't to protect you, always.

Anonymous 03/15/16 (Tue) 17:21:44 No.511484

File: 1458062507569.jpg (609.26 KB, 1072x804, 4:3, DSCF10302.jpg)

>>511273

>on trip to a large lake with family for a week

>huge ass spider living in a hole next to the front door

>everyone freaks out that I treat it like a fucking pet

>installed a lamp behind the web to fill it up with bugs

Why do people have a problem with spiders? I was glad it got rid of mosquitoes at least

>picture related is the said spider

Anonymous 03/15/16 (Tue) 20:25:26 No.511564

>>511288

How else am I going to get the random assorted foxes, wolves, and others wrapped up in tight cocoons for use as hammocks, playthings, or food?

Arachnid dominance is the order of they day, is it not?

Anonymous 03/15/16 (Tue) 20:34:58 No.511568

How funny that you started this thread, OP. I have nothing against spiders. To me they're simply tiny passerby-ers. But there's this certain type of spider that keeps appearing all over my house and I'm curious of what species it is. Maybe you could help?

>file size too big

oh. ok. I guess that's what I get for using a fucking phone.

>>511564

You sound like you could use a blowjob.

Anonymous 03/15/16 (Tue) 20:40:57 No.511572

>>511484

>Be spider

>Its a tough life, obviously

>Have to live in a hole because people won't be my friends

>All of a sudden this fucking bro creates a heavenly light that keeps me warm and somehow attracts my food

You are a saint to spiderkind.

Anonymous 03/15/16 (Tue) 21:23:45 No.511597