Afraid of suicide

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Afraid of suicide Anonymous 06/22/15 (Mon) 16:14:55 No.74

I don't want to live but I'm afraid of suicide. I just feel like if I cross the street I won't look both ways.

Anonymous 06/22/15 (Mon) 20:24:48 No.75

You can plan for suicide all you want, but unless its the exact impulse moment you won't carry through with it.

I'm more afraid of the survival instinct. There is a reason suicide attempts drop so drastically after the first. If there was a chemical/pill that could shut that off it would make it so much easier.

I just want to be done with it, but your body won't let you. I've ripped off the noose, fucked up on the overdoses and it gets more difficult each time I try.

I'm betting on just jumping. Hopefully that impulse will work before I can react.

Anonymous 06/24/15 (Wed) 06:44:35 No.120

>>75

You're not wrong. The main obstacle to suicide isn't family or police, it's your body's innate survival instinct. That's why things like the exit bag are so popular.

Survival Sickness Skeleton 09/04/15 (Fri) 22:03:00 No.260

>Should one kill oneself? Killing oneself, though, implies some sense of resistance: one must possess a value that one can destroy. Where there is nothing, the destructive actions themselves crumble to nothing. You cannot hurl a void into a void. "If only a rock would fall and kill me," wrote Kierkegaard, "at least that would be an expedient." I doubt if there is anyone today who has not been touched by the horror of a thought such as that. Inertia is the surest killer, the inertia of people who settle for senility at eighteen, plunging eight hours a day into degrading work and feeding on ideologies. Beneath the miserable tinsel of the spectacle there are only gaunt figures yearning for, yet dreading, Kierkegaard's "expedient," so that they might never again have to desire what they dread and dread what they desire.

Skeleton 09/05/15 (Sat) 04:33:34 No.263

File: 1441427614474.jpeg (168.2 KB, 500x500, 1:1, 1378368141671.jpeg)

>>260

Source? That was brilliant.

Along that line of thought, this board can be described as perhaps what is beyond /suicide/ - in both the metaphorical (assuming you don't make claims about the afterlife) and emotional sense.

Suicide is always a reaction against something, a last ditch solution to an individual's perceived inability to fulfill certain imperatives that their culture has fixed into them. But this still ultimately implies that one houses those values in themselves, and that these values are ultimately self-destructive. The aimless rush towards "love", "happiness", or material wealth is doomed to fail because the former two are purposely buried under pseudo-philosphical enigma, and the latter is useless unless used for something.

That's a gross oversimplification of the influence structuring has in suicide, but the point I'm making is that suicide is ultimately not your own death. Like any other death, it is merely one that has came to you through sheer chance, because you happened to be incompatible with the ideology your culture has forced on you either because of your genetics or the experiences that shaped you.

This is why a true nihilist would never commit suicide. A true nihilist would be so utterly liberated from the noise of the external world that they would enter a state of absolute peace and indifference, to the point that their body would be useless to them and would simply expire from lack of nutrition. This would be the ultimate freedom.

Or, to put it more simply: What's the point in killing yourself?

Skeleton 09/05/15 (Sat) 21:19:18 No.275

>>263

Also if this existence is truly so horrible and every new thing we explore and find is equally horrible then why would there be peace or relief in death?

What if there is an afterlife and it is even worse? Or if it was great and you ruin it?

What if nonexistence isn't peace and the lack of an afterlife doesn't free us from some kind of self-inflicted torment in which our last moments alive are stretched on forever like light towards a black hole, always approaching death but never reaching it?

Suicide is to dive into the unknown ready to explore and take risks. If we are so tired of life then surely it is risks and exploration that we are tired of. Why plunge yourself into that again?

I think i would rather spend my despair repeating that which i know over and over than exploring something new. Better the devil i know than the devil i don't.

Skeleton 09/06/15 (Sun) 20:54:15 No.276

>>275

Suicide ironically is the ultimate leap of faith for someone who cherishes their values. It is giving up everything for a chance at something better in spite of the fact that we know nothing about what happens after we die and so have no right to make any claims about the afterlife or the after-life.

Rather than flee from the horrors of existence (in utter futility I might add; human existence cannot be anything more than fleeing from the angst constantly nipping at our heels), a nihilist does an about-face and meets these horrors. In doing so, one is able to free themselves from whatever mirage they've been chasing after and be a creature of action, even if this action means to be a passive nihilist and choose inaction.

If only it were so easy to just choose suicide. But we're well past suicide.