No.533643
>>533641
fuck off meme boy
No.533647
>>533645
wanna grab that chub
No.533648
No.533649
I'm trapped in old lady hell
No.533650
>>533649
i bet it smells great in there
all the scents and perfumes
i miss my gran gran
No.533651
No.533652
>>533649
I can fucking smell those rooms
No.533653
>>533650
>>533652
Ye it's super stuffy
No.533655
>>533654
the thumbnail looks like a hand grabbing a butt.
No.533656
No.533657
>>533655
i too was thoroughly disappointed
No.533658
No.533659
saltlick, weed isn't a psychedelic, you silly sod
somebody may be mixing bath salts into your weed, just don't chew anybody's face off
No.533660
Why's everyone so desperate to give him a lava lamp dick
It's like tentabulges all over again
No.533661
it just takes that breakthrough dose..
No.533662
No.533663
>>533660
well he needs a dick, how else are they supposed to make porn of him?
No.533664
>>533660
>trolls with tentabulges
>gems with tentabulges
>skellies with glowing dick
the tumblr cycle repeats itself
No.533665
>>533664
Humans with dog penises
No.533666
>>533660
>Sans' glowing tentabulge
No.533668
>>533659
>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Effects_of_cannabis#Psychoactive_effects
weed's weird but it's often classed as a psychedelic, sensory distortions and pseudo-hallcuinations occur at high doses, and I'm a super lightweight
also I'm literally psychotic, as in I hallucinate all on my own. no-one I smoke with has the experiences I have. I don't think I've been getting adulterated weed my entire life.
No.533669
>>533667
see? teenage girl who dreads pregnancy is a tentabulge fan.
No.533672
No.533673
No.533674
>>533670
tbh no
vag kanaya on vag rose is hot
if you really must have some sort of fleshy penetration happening, just give kan the cock
tentabulges will never not look weird as hell
No.533675
tentabulges were kind of cool because they were prehensile and could do extra things besides be a cock
i don't see why other fandom cocks are a thing though
No.533677
throbbing tentacles? writhing tentacles.
rigid tentacles? supple tentacles.
No.533678
No.533679
>>533676
>genital stripping being part of troll reproduction
>john having no idea his cock and most of his reproductive system is about to be torn out mid-coitus
No.533680
>>533679
>>533679
>john having no idea his cock and most of his reproductive system is about to be torn out mid-coitus
post the fic
No.533681
>>533679
more like chosen troll reproduction
No.533682
Opals lips look like an anus horrible hemorrhoids
No.533683
>>533682
her design is indeed horrible
i like amethysts lips though they look like a tasty cervical donut
i want to slip my cock in there
No.533684
>>533670
this but unironically
No.533687
No.533688
>>533683
that's fucking disgusting sounding you're gross
No.533690
File: 1448210305867.jpg (Spoiler Image, 141.42 KB, 750x1334, 375:667, 1448148710902.jpg)
No.533691
>tfw huge permanent scar on my dick
>it hurts everytime i get an erection
No.533692
No.533694
>>533691
How the fuck did you get a scar on your dick
No.533695
>>533694
maybe he's jewish
No.533696
No.533697
>>533694
i accidentally ran a blade on my dick when i was extremely drunk
No.533698
No.533700
No.533701
>>533699
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
No.533702
>>533699
times have changed...
No.533703
>hyperbole and a half last updated two years ago
>she will never update it again
feels bad
No.533704
>>533699
> replies "REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"
>328 likes, 165 reblogs
No.533705
File: 1448210754276.png (151.61 KB, 703x768, 703:768, https://41.media.tumblr.co….png)
No.533706
No.533707
>>533676
I love this picture.
No.533708
>>533704
It has 9 likes, 1 reblog, and no additional comment on that reblog.
No.533709
>>533697
alcohol drinkers are just as bad as weed smokers
No.533710
>>533697
were you trying to simulate how a blowjob from Terezi would feel like?
No.533712
*sniff sniff*
uh oh, did wes start posting poopydot again?
No.533714
File: 1448211954341.png (394.55 KB, 477x667, 477:667, https://41.media.tumblr.co….png)
chubby peri makes my dick a bit hard
No.533716
No.533717
>>533714
so you like your turds extra large eh
No.533719
>>533717
you're worse than the joey anon
No.533721
No.533722
>>533721
vvivvisect vvivvisect
No.533724
>>533723
put the shuttle in her ass
No.533725
No.533726
"okay. yeah, okay." John smiled. "you're right. i can do this. and it's going to be awesome."
“I knew you’d come around,” Vriska said. She kissed him, and laid down on top of him. Her bulge was rubbing against his cock. It was wet and slippery from the fluid it had released earlier. John moaned into her mouth as the nubs brushed his cock head.
Vriska reached down with one hand, and guided her bulge under his balls. She set the tip of it against the skin right beneath them.
John was confused. He pulled his lips away from Vriska’s. “wait,” he said. “that’s not…”
Vriska thrust her bulge forward.
The tip of the bulge slid back, exposing the sharp tip of the bone that ran down it. It tore through John’s skin, and the rest of the bulge followed it into his body, widening the cavity that the tip had created.
John cried out in pain. He could feel the bulge tearing through his muscle. He spasmed in shock, and his arms gripped Vriska tight against him.
He opened his mouth to yell at Vriska, to scream at her to stop, but she pulled her bulge out and thrust it back in, and his vision went white and he couldn’t say a word. His senses were overwhelmed. All he could feel was centered on the organ that was tearing its way through him.
The pain wasn’t the worst part. The pain was terrible, it was so bad that it had locked his body in place, so bad that his nerves had screamed out in agony all at once, overwhelming his body and his brain. It was too much, though. It was so much that his brain had shoved it aside, and now he felt lightheaded, as if he were swimming and had stayed in too long. He felt the pain as something alien, as if it were happening to someone else.
The pain wasn’t the worst part. The worst part was the way that he could feel his muscles hanging loosely, that he could feel bits of himself flopping around inside his body. He could feel each stroke of Vriska’s bone bulge as it slid in and out. The nubs bumped against his skin as Vriska penetrated him, and they rubbed at his insides. He felt everything, and was screaming in his mind that this was wrong, that it was terribly, incomprehensibly wrong.
“Stop it!” he screamed, and finally, his mouth worked, and his voice came out. He pushed Vriska off of him. Then in a panic, he stood up and ran toward the door, toward the exit, toward the way out. He could feel blood dripping down his thighs, and his vision was a swirl of colors. He tried to blink it away.
No.533727
No.533728
When he finished his languid blink, he was back on the bed, with Vriska on top of him. What had just happened? Had that been dream? A hallucination? The sensation of blood running down his thighs was real, though. He could feel it trickling out of him. Vriska was kissing him, biting his lip. John hardly felt it. It was getting more and more difficult to focus on what was going on.
He noticed, though, when Vriska pushed herself up. For a moment John thought that she was finished, but she had just changed positions. Now she was kneeling up straight, and she had grabbed onto his legs and was penetrating him even deeper.
“Oh my god, Egg8ert, this is so awesome!” Vriska’s face was ecstatic. “You could fill a 8ucket in no time!”
She lifted a blanket from the bed to show him. It was soaked, and was dripping deep red fluid. It took John several seconds before he understood what he was looking at. It was his blood.
“Vriska, help,” John said. “Help.” He had no idea whether sound was coming from his mouth. It didn’t even occur to him to wonder anymore. Everything was blurring, fading. And Vriska was still going. She was fucking him even harder, now, thrusting her bulge in and out of him. Her pelvis slammed against his with every thrust, and her nubs ground against his muscles as they slid in and out.
His vision was going black around the edges. He could still hear her panting, though. “Oh my god, John, this is so gr8! I’m going to pail!”
Vriska thrust deep inside of him one last time, and held herself there. Something chill splashed inside of him, and his stomach twitched and shivered. It was the last motion that his body could perform. He could feel himself filling up with whatever it was. He could feel it running up around his stomach, into his chest. His vision closed completely, and all that was left was dark and cold. He was floating in a dark sea, eyes closed. It was almost calming in a way. He felt himself drifting away.
“Eg8ert? Eg8ert?”
Someone was talking to him, but he couldn’t quite place the voice. It was way too hard to keep thinking. He didn’t want to get up for school.
“Eg8ert!”
Nope, come back tomorrow. He was just going to lay here in his bed. He could go to school tomorrow. The voice got further and further as he drifted. Soon it would fade completely, and he could finally rest.
“John?”
“Joooooooohn!”
No.533729
that's what happens when you agree to gay sex
No.533730
No.533731
No.533732
No.533733
No.533734
>the blog about jap culture run by two japanese girls that i used to read as a kid stopped updating an year ago
>the last post's comment section is full of worried people asking if everything is alright
oh no
oh no
No.533735
No.533736
wwhere wwere you in ninety twwo
No.533737
>>533735
some say i'm anon
some might say i'm the reverse!
No.533738
No.533739
>>533737
i would say you're damp garbage
No.533740
No.533741
>>533740
if i pull that of would you die?
No.533742
>>533741
it would be extremely baneful
No.533743
No.533745
>>533734
who is this semen demon
No.533747
>>533745
It's a drawing I made because I was going to bed late I'm impressed anyone saved it
No.533751
No.533752
No.533753
>>533750
Maybe North India...
No.533754
No.533755
No.533757
>>533750
Is that
Is that a baby
No.533758
>>533755
That commercial always spooked me as a kid
No.533759
fuck spoder girl
in the anal
No.533760
No.533761
>>533756
i didnt know they stacked shit that high
No.533762
No.533765
fuck spider girl in the spinneret
No.533767
to-day I have:
>applied for unemployment benefits
>registered with a job service
>applied for a deferment on my student loans
>applied for a job
after having done almost nothing of any value for days
whoo
No.533768
>>533767
hahaha what a failure
No.533769
>>533767
congratulation
i cleaned the house and cried for a bit
No.533770
to-day I have:
>taken a shower
>ate reheated spaghetti with meat sauce
>got mickey d's coffee (medium) and a dunkin donut (boston creme)
>shitposted on hsg
whoo
No.533771
No.533772
>>533767
did you save the unemployment application for proof of hardship for your loan deferment?
when I did the same they asked for that
No.533773
to-day I have:
>masturbated twice
>drawn scat
>shitposted only briefly
>fixed my bike
>listened to a bunch of music
whoo
No.533774
i need to blog and i have nowhere to do it
No.533775
>>533773
are you oekakianon?
No.533776
No.533777
>>533776
because you said you drew scat and he drew peripics
No.533778
i need my music to be louder but everything is already at 100%!!!
No.533779
to-day I have:
>ate breakfast
>bought a plunger
>slept
>played la noire
>slept
>posted this
whoo
No.533780
>>533775
i oekakid a little
should i draw more or go hit up some whores on /soc/
No.533781
No.533783
>made coffee and spaghetti
>added/updated some xposed modules
>shitposted
>watched gccx
>made spaghetti and coffee
>paid credit debt
>read
No.533784
No.533785
No.533786
>>533783
WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?
No.533787
No.533788
>>533787
oh, alright then.
>>533783
Hi.
No.533789
>>533787
Oh! Because of the daoist thing, that makes sense
No.533790
Egg are you actually a daoist now or is this a new schtick
No.533791
to-day I have:
>masturbated
>failed to install a game
>forgot to clean the garden
>shitposted on HSG
man, i love lazy Sundays
No.533792
>>533791
I DON'T FUGGING CARE STO PGREENTEXTING YOU FUCKS
No.533793
No.533794
keep greenposting, it makes me feel better about being a lazy sack of shit
No.533795
>>533791
i care anon it feels comfy to read about your life
No.533797
>>533795
fuck you.
you're dead.
No.533798
to-day I have:
>dug up a sufficient number of articles for my paper
>thought about my paper
>not written anything down l m a o
>started new meds
>listened to old modest mouse
No.533799
>>533795
woah fucking creepy
No.533801
No.533802
>>533799
care to tell me a little bit about your day, anon? ;3
No.533803
ugh it's so hard not to preemptively judge music by the album cover
No.533804
No.533805
why is the soc thread dead
No.533806
seriously just tell me about your day
i'm almost there anon p-please
No.533807
>>533804
it pains me to listen to music with a shitty cover
No.533808
>>533805
cause youre all ugly and dumb
No.533809
>>533805
isn't it like 700 posts long, about time it broke
No.533810
No.533811
>>533803
Is that so wrong? That choice was made to, you know, represent their art that way. First impressions don't give you a whole picture, but they tell you something at least
No.533812
No.533813
No.533814
>>533810
>>533811
the problem is that some really good albums have bad covers
and i'm paranoid about missing them
No.533815
No.533817
No.533818
i'm a pretty handsome lad
most of hsg looks prettyy fucking good
i would fuck you tbh
No.533819
>>533814
This is true
If someone recommends something of course listen to them above the album cover, but if you're just browsing randomly or whatever then i'd say cover is a legit reason to not go for it
No.533820
>>533818
this but ironically
No.533821
i should come out to my sister and friends
No.533822
to-day I:
>had a dream about war but without corpses and deaths so it was p cool
>woke up and petted dog
>had breakfast
>gave breakfast to dog and changed his water
>walked dog
>drew one frame
>shitposted
>petted dog
>played videogames
>watched stuff
>petted dog more
>had lunch
>pet'd + gave dog water
>finished watching that one thing
>drew more
>shitposted
>put stuff in the washing machine
>more petting
>procrastinated on some stuff
>dog dinner
>my dinner
>put stuff in the dryer
>more drawing
>more petting
>more shitposting
>walked dog
And now I'm shitposting
No.533823
No.533825
No.533826
>>533822
i am jealous of your good day, nice
No.533827
No.533828
>>533825
back off that's joey's wife
No.533829
i cant stop thinking about being a girl
No.533830
i dreamt that a giant passenger airplane was slowly flying by my windows except it was upside down
No.533831
>>533824
yes yes
joey less peridot, keep it up
No.533833
>>533829
then how would you be an epic lad
No.533834
today
>woke up
>shitpost
>eat cereal
>shitpost
>washed dishes
>played dmc4
>walk dog
>shitpost again
No.533835
>>533827
hahaha
no
Alternatively O|:^B works too I guess
No.533836
>>533835
do you have a tumor
No.533837
No.533838
>>533835
is this karkat with a straight mustache and a rhino horn or john with a hat on
No.533839
adult swim power levels:
S:
- the eric andre show
- the venture bros
A
- harvey birdman
- xavier renegade angel
- rick and morty season 1
- early aqua teen
- squidbillies
- black dynamite
power gap
C
- tim and eric
- rick and morty season 2
- the heart, she holler
- 12 oz mouse
- steve brule
- childrens hospital
- mike tyson mysteries
No.533842
>>533839
>Rick and Morty Season 1
>not S tier
wwhen's venture coming back
No.533843
>>533836
no that's my epic hair you dunce
No.533844
No.533845
>>533840
hidden hidden hidden
No.533846
>>533842
>'
>v
>coming
givve me your badge
No.533847
>>533846
shit I fucked up didn't i
No.533848
wwe dont need no stinkin badges
No.533849
No.533850
File: 1448223962679.gif (206.19 KB, 464x270, 232:135, what_s_a_toilet_by_piranha….gif)
No.533851
>>533849
we're gonna have to put her down
No.533852
wwe dont need no meme control
No.533853
i was sad but have successfully transformed that into anger
No.533854
No.533855
No.533856
No.533857
No.533858
peri crushing joey's head with her thighs
No.533860
No.533861
No.533862
No.533863
peri giving joey e. coli and hepatitis
No.533864
No.533865
No.533866
No.533867
No.533868
joey crushing peri with her sphincter
No.533869
peri failing her soft vore exam
No.533870
No.533871
amethyst failing the penis inspection three weeks in a row
No.533872
No.533873
amethyst trying to morph a penis to piss off pearl
amethyst and pearl having no idea what a penis looks like
No.533874
No.533875
Amethyst and Pearl almost raping Steven for knowledge
No.533876
amethyst and pearl asking steven for a penis demonstration
No.533877
No.533878
No.533879
drop a tab
take a load off!
what could go wrong?
No.533880
see your local steven for a penis demonstration today
No.533881
what should i 3d print hsg
No.533883
>>533881
flood the market with shitty amiibo knockoffs
No.533884
No.533885
>>533882
sans and sans flee from poop
No.533886
>>533772
it's not a hardship deferment I think but I did save a bunch of documents for that exact reason
No.533887
No.533888
No.533889
No.533890
No.533891
No.533892
No.533893
>>533892
who the fuck let roxykitten out of the basement
No.533894
I want a cutie pie gf that skitters around on many legs and can sense your body heat with her pit sense organs!
No.533895
my gf has been sleeping literally all weekend
No.533896
No.533897
>>533895
are you sure she's not dead
No.533898
>>533895
your gf is a waste of space
No.533899
god hannibal's new show is so bad
and it looks like he gained weight too
i'm worried for him
No.533900
>>533897
she snores sometimes
No.533901
No.533902
>>533895
probably dreaming about taking the BBC...
No.533903
>>533900
put her hand in warm water
an epic prank!
No.533904
No.533905
>>533904
no i watched some of it just now because i've been meaning to get around to it
No.533906
more sissification porn RUINED by racist bbc worship
No.533908
this is a bbc only boipussy
No.533909
>>533882
ooo where did you get sans?
No.533910
when you're ready
>>533907
No.533911
>>533909
goatfuckers leave
No.533912
>>533911
excuse me
how dare you
No.533913
No.533916
No.534171
>>533881
a frog with a stupid dick for a face
No.534177
man, upping my Zoloft really did wonders for my energy level, I'm into this
>>533909
what's your paper on, NA?