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There's no discharge in the war!

File: 1cfab9415a600db⋯.jpg (603.74 KB, 1776x1028, 444:257, Sea-Peoples-Mural.jpg)

cfcb71 No.489436

>Around 1,200 BC a bunch of unknown people went full Viking on the Mediterranean, plundering in particular the coast of North Africa around modern day Egypt before vanishing without a trace

>While there has been many theories where they could have come from, nobody to this day knows who they were and where they went

Any /k/ommandos know much about this subject at all?

Think they will one day return to Remove Kebab across the Med?

1f3d9e No.489441

File: adf3a0fa41ff17c⋯.jpg (27.27 KB, 870x612, 145:102, 1469161827794.jpg)

>>489436

Phoenicians maybe? Just a polite guess though.


b14541 No.489445

>what is wikipedia

this has nothing to do with guns, piss off


95d16b No.489446

YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.

>>489436

The current theory is that it turned out simple foot soldiers can defeat charioteers. Now, the charioteers were the nobility, while the foot soldiers were mercenaries who were supposed to play a secondary role in battle. So said mercenaries started slaughtering the nobility and one kingdom fell after the other. So yes, they are the ancient equivalent of a bunch of PMCs taking out whole armies with cheap AT, AA, and ASh missiles.

http://press.princeton.edu/titles/10185.html


f03d61 No.489475

File: 7e8e82c26832a67⋯.jpg (54.58 KB, 400x267, 400:267, Happy dog.jpg)

>>489436

>TFW you just know this is future /k/ommandos getting bored and travelling back in time to escape their demolition man tier society and raid ancient civilisations (using period weapons) for shits and giggles.


78bc86 No.489476

>>489445

>/k/, the weapons board, is just about guns

Kill yourself before I come after you with my spoon!

>>489446

This got suddenly a whole lot more interesting.

>>489475

I wouldn't be surprised.


2705e5 No.489480

>>489445

Leave

>>489446

>Literally history repeats


228b1b No.489482

>>489475

I would trust kommandos with gunpowder or blackpowder weapons. I would not trust them to do anything but hurt themselves using bows or melee weaponry, let alone be fit enough to compete against dedicated foot soldiers that live in the time period. The mental image of some kommando attempting to perform the isosceles stance with a short bow while a bunch of egyptian footsoldiers jst stare at him in amusement is pretty funny, though.


eedd0b No.489485

>>489482

>Implying even /k/ommandos could fuck up a Phalanx

It was always the ideal form of warfare for largely unprofessional inexperienced militias.


2705e5 No.489489

>>489485

They would find a terrifying way to fuck it up

>Call for the /k/ommandos to form a phalanx

>Some try to form a Viking Shield Wall not getting memo

>Others have their shields the wrong way round

>All that ends up forming is some sort of porcupine formation with spears using dragon dildo ends sticking out


eedd0b No.489495

>>489489

Actually, you make a good point. Only /k/ could fuck up a bunch of dudes standing as close as they can while moving forward. Even /tg/ could pull that off.


10dceb No.489497

I think it doesn't sound very /k/ related.

At least try to bend it more to our scope.

What would you guys do if sea people invaded, for instance.


4a6cb6 No.489500

>>489497

>One of the most mysterious peoples in human history who brought about the destruction of ancient civilization through naval raids not /k/ related

Well okay then, I guess Vikings aren't /k/ related either, nor I guess Crusades or Mongolians for that matter.


e5e284 No.489505

>>489485

It's still pretty ideal for riot cops


b14541 No.489522

>>489476

Pfft I bet you don't even have a spoon license.


942cd4 No.489544

>>489436

What happened during that period is actually quite fascinating.

around that period there were multiple happenings that caused the collapse of Mediterranean civilization

Timeline is something like:

>Volcano on Thera erupts destroying most of the Minoans.

>we have written records in China about crop failures and fucked up skies.

>Ancient Persians are too busy dealing with the gigantic pillar of fiery volcanic ash and the skies turning black to watch a bunch of their Jewish slaves.

>said Jews run away, thank their god and all the bushes that caught fire, and blame the Egyptians.

>the sea peoples (whoever they were) decide to start raiding because everything is either on fire and crops are failing because of the fucking volcano.

>Mycenae probably conquers what is left of the Minoans

>Then the Greeks come along 1000 years later, look at the ruins and write a bunch of gay poetry.


28f6cf No.489548

>>489489

>>489495

>only a handful of /k/ommandos are dressed in the time-appropriate armor

>some are wearing 11th century mail hauberks and bucket helmets and trying to use heater shields to form their part of the shield wall

>others are in early colonial militia dress and using fucking spontoons as their polearms, with no shields in sight

>picatinny rails for tactical javelin storage glued to everything; people are losing eyes before combat even begins in earnest from turning at the wrong time directly into the tip of a javelin secured to the helmet of the /k/ommando next to them

>there's one asshole in a fursuit that's pushed to the very front of the formation so he can die first

>at some point, somebody in the back of the formation starts screaming about how someone ejaculated in the emergency rations

The only good that might come out of the entire thing is that the enemy army might think we're just a bunch of village idiots and have mercy on us.


639b8a No.489550

Weren't they from Sardinia?


639b8a No.489555

>>489548

You forgot about some /pol/acks defecting to the Egyptians because Kek.


f03d61 No.489560

>>489548

It shouldn't take more than 30 minutes, a day at most, to train a company of /k/omandos to use a phalanx formation. In the meet up invitation you make sure to mention that any faggot who turns up with historically inaccurate weapons or kit gets put on skirmisher duty, and then you use the skirmishers as the first wave to charge the opposition - eventually they'll get the message (those who survive at least).

>>489555

And then Kek (alternate spelling 'kuk', pronounced 'cuck') decides that it doesn't matter who is the butt of the joke, or what the consequences are, so long as it's funny. The /pol/acks quickly realise that dey reely wuz Kangs ('n sheeeeit).

Just thinking, how much would you have to modify modern light infantry tactics to accommodate bronze age weapons? I'm assuming a short answer would be somewhere between "completely" and "doesn't work, fuck off noob", but if nothing else Odenathus pulled off something vaguely similar granted 1200 years later, but shhhh


f03d61 No.489561

>>489560

>1200 years

~1600 years.


c8af9a No.489562

>>489505

You're thinking of the Roman Testudo.


635cfa No.489565

>>489562

no, phalanx.

just move forward and mop down commies stupid enough to not run away

>>489550

they must be germans, because germans are obsessed with destroying civilisation.


d1c33f No.489574

>>489565

>Implying poles know anything about civilisation


f03d61 No.489575

>>489574

and you think you would transportedconvictbro?


635cfa No.489578

File: 53e35155d888950⋯.jpg (31.66 KB, 392x409, 392:409, germans.jpg)

>>489574

well, more then germans

like for example TO NOT DESTROY IT

or how to not murder each other in swamps and forests for some bullshit reason for 30 years straight

or how to not start war with all the nations at once okay that point is debatable, killing hope for normal europe and death of socialism.

two fucking times

or how to not flood your country with race whose only nvention was a pointy stick


7e1d9b No.489580

File: a5e7cb94f1b63b6⋯.jpg (213.85 KB, 780x1560, 1:2, goed plan nederball.jpg)

Obviously it was the Franks.


bfd5fc No.489588

>>489580

What were the Franks doing at 1200 BC?


635cfa No.489597

>>489588

pillaging egypt, apparently


30e55d No.489598

>>489597

Whats the bet Kangz try to take credit for that one?


635cfa No.489599

>>489598

so egyptians and sea people are both niggers?

it even makes sense, niggers throw tantrum and start killing each other all the time.


9143aa No.489601

>>489599

Niggers don't have to be black just ask Jock anon


635cfa No.489603

>>489601

i fear that we dont have these here


9143aa No.489606

>>489603

May do if Scottish get their Independence, join the EU and Jocks start migrating to your country and taking all your jobs :^)


dd2911 No.489617

File: 3ede946e2237c2f⋯.png (11.18 KB, 255x196, 255:196, 64a8699681350ce5667d6ec954….png)

>>489574

>Australian

Poles aren't infallible sure, but you really shouldn't be talking when it come to civilization


c8af9a No.489625

File: 3ee6ebbad023183⋯.jpg (507.92 KB, 700x919, 700:919, 76993_gallery.jpg)

>>489565

testudo


84d093 No.489627

File: 54561442cb47f15⋯.jpg (97.83 KB, 770x443, 770:443, Amazing_Facts_Macedonian_p….jpg)

>>489505

>>489562

Come to think of it a Macedonian Phalanx probably WOULD be pretty ideal for riot cops provided you didn't mind a few rioters getting poked now and then. Encourages them to stay >10 feet back from the police line.


058d60 No.489628

File: 9e786638d681b60⋯.jpg (111.05 KB, 685x1336, 685:1336, MCatcher-4.JPG)

File: 4e81f9734f31031⋯.jpg (48.42 KB, 320x574, 160:287, 3188595470_90d4f13394_b.jpg)

>>489627

Imagine a phalanx of cops with man catchers. Taking rioters into custody would suddenly be a fucking breeze.


28f6cf No.489631

>>489627

Seems like it would be even more vulnerable to thrown weaponry like bricks and beer bottles though, what with the lack of shield coverage and both hands being used to support the pikes


ada8b2 No.489632

>>489628

Of course Sweden would whip out the bondage gear.


058d60 No.489633

File: 403ad2da70588f8⋯.png (134.69 KB, 280x340, 14:17, gun.png)

>>489632

Hey if it works it works.


e44a3e No.489636

>>489628

>capturing rioters

>not just shooting them with live ammo


0ed85e No.489637

>>489636

This honestly. All the west's problems would be solved if we were willing to just fucking kill people. Shoot border jumpers, they'll learn. Shoot rioters, they'll learn. Just takes a little fear to keep assholes in line.


635cfa No.489639

>>489637

>>489637

torpedo muslim invaders

Riots are interesting, since fighting in formation in them is logical since its mostly hand to hand combat, but explosives completly kill formations. Is there any way to make formation that wouldnt be as shitty against bombs?


e44a3e No.489640

>>489637

>>489639

How hype would it be to see cops fire frag grenades into crowds of anitfa or rioting nogs?


62c418 No.489642

File: 803bcc8f7b5b4c1⋯.jpg (16.32 KB, 400x442, 200:221, headgear.jpg)

>>489640

Would it be hype if they fired them into all crowds, regardless of political affiliation?


ada8b2 No.489644

File: 93ea77436a2b4fd⋯.jpg (81.78 KB, 425x282, 425:282, 33633.jpg)

>>489639

>torpedo muslim invaders

>/k/ gets a submarine somehow and sits in the Mediterranean

>Crew look like Das Boot LARP'ers

>They seek out refugee boats and torpedo them

>Word begins to spread and more Subs join the Wolfpack

>Begin raiding merchant ships for supplies

>Suddenly recreate the War in the Atlantic in full in the Med


f0568a No.489646

File: d4f19c176e6fdf7⋯.webm (3.54 MB, 1360x768, 85:48, Silent Hunter Poland BTFO.webm)

>>489644

A man can dream.


e44a3e No.489648

Hey /k/, if the idea of dropping mortars and frag grenades on commies takes me out of a depression and makes me happy, does that make me a bad person? I mean they are commies, so no harm down in blowing them to bits.


05a527 No.489656

File: 4199a360337522b⋯.png (781.89 KB, 1669x1063, 1669:1063, phalanx.png)


88b7de No.489657

>>489644

Hey man, whenever I go to watch Das Boot I switch all the lights over to red ones and get the whole place smelling like salt.


cb652c No.489660

>>489644

>>489639

Seriously a fantasy of mine. I'm sure the Russian mob could get us a submarine.


9143aa No.489669

>>489644

>>489646

>>489657

>>489660

Think it needs added to /television/'s war kino thread for a filmnight.


09de8c No.489683

File: 615a555ab0ec0e4⋯.jpg (40.52 KB, 600x579, 200:193, Comfy_guy.jpg)

>All this discussion on ancient history


0ea91d No.489688

>>489544

You need to look at a timeline again


9143aa No.489691

>>489683

/k/ needs threads like these more often honestly.


fd4394 No.489712

>>489436

WHERE DID YOU COME FROM

WHERE DID YOU GO

WHERE DID YOU COME FROM

PHONECIAN JOE


2e60c4 No.489725

File: 058eb77e25a3f9f⋯.jpeg (74.42 KB, 506x755, 506:755, serveimage.jpeg)

>>489644

Meanwhile, outside of Streloks' collective fantasy, this is what the /k/riegsmarine actually looks like.

Damn it to hell, don't go by the book, think like a pirate! I want a man with a tattoo on his dick! Have I got the right man?


17a35b No.489726

File: 776039cb3f13c16⋯.jpg (48.3 KB, 326x499, 326:499, 51r91N-9zbL._SX324_BO1,204….jpg)

Pic related is a good book on the topic, it goes over what Bronze Age civilization was like on the eve of the collapse. Like some other anons in the thread have said, I believe that as a result of climate-related factors, the whole of the Mediterranean region was destabilized. Large numbers of people from the Western Mediterranean migrated eastwards pillaging their way across Greece, Anatolia, Crete, down the Levant, before finally being defeated in a Pyrrhic victory by the Egyptians, who fell into decline following the war.


941ecb No.489733

File: 03313476a2a03cb⋯.jpg (14.34 KB, 250x320, 25:32, hfkg.jpg)

>>489436

>"Sea Peoples" come out of nowhere

>push everyone's shit in

Nordische af, Meds btfo


941ecb No.489736

File: ac059179bfdfe19⋯.jpg (131.47 KB, 317x432, 317:432, lghlnedgfolngf.jpg)

>>489441

Semite, pls


639b8a No.489738

>>489733

They were defeated by Ramses III


9285b8 No.489743

>>489738

After wearying themselves ravaging every other civilization in existence, they were finally stopped by the the relatives of the same red haired, fair skinned people they would later have trouble with. It works.


639b8a No.489746

>>489733

Also the sea people were probably a collection of different races like the Sherden, who came from the Mediterranean.


941ecb No.489748

File: f6d577e44f5a81e⋯.jpg (68.26 KB, 540x760, 27:38, 37921059pt7.jpg)

File: 7a18eb9b5421d02⋯.jpg (308.75 KB, 1216x892, 304:223, jyj2p.jpg)

>>489746

>The first certain mention of the Sherden is found in the records of Ramesses II (ruled 1279-1213 BCE), who defeated them in his second year (1278 BCE) when they attempted to raid Egypt's coast. The pharaoh subsequently incorporated many of these warriors into his personal guard. An inscription by Ramesses II on a stele from Tanis which recorded the Sherden pirates' raid and subsequent defeat, speaks of the constant threat which they posed to Egypt's Mediterranean coasts:

> "the unruly Sherden whom no one had ever known how to combat, they came boldly sailing in their warships from the midst of the sea, none being able to withstand them."

Sound familiar? One race, the master race


88b7de No.489806

File: d83051783919665⋯.png (166.88 KB, 392x409, 392:409, Correction.png)


2705e5 No.489816

>>489725

Sub thread when?


b5d3b7 No.489818

>>489544

>>Then the Greeks come along 1000 years later, look at the ruins and write a bunch of gay poetry.

You realize that Myceneans were Hellenophones, right?


b5d3b7 No.489820

>>489644

With the proper "oiling" I think you can make this dream come true.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Military_of_the_European_Union#Naval_forces

arrange board hierarchy by attack subs ;^)


52dead No.490077

File: 1a36ef57cfcbbe0⋯.jpeg (453.43 KB, 2400x1152, 25:12, serveimage.jpeg)

>>489644

>>489646

>>489820

While they aren't 'proper' submersibles, what about weaponizing pic related?

I mean, if a bunch of illiterate Columbian slave workers can build them, I'm sure a bunch of drunk Streloks with a welder and access to a junkyard could manage.


78d8e0 No.490097

File: 93b0c18a6a405c0⋯.jpg (103.96 KB, 1140x800, 57:40, Conrad_Wise_Chapman_-_Subm….jpg)

>>490077

>Not rebuilding the Hunley

>Not bayoneting nigger boats with a giant exploding spear while giving out a wild rebel yell and then backing away before blowing them to kingdom come


6d6ca8 No.490172

>>490097

What's the bet they used that musket to bayonet shipping?


369dc0 No.490187

>>490097

the monitor was superior


d18461 No.490190

>>490097

>sank during testing with five of eight crewmen lost

>was raised and returned to service

>sank again during a live fire exercise with all hands lost, including her creator

>was raised and returned to service

>successfully torpedoed the USS Housatonic, becoming the first submarine to sink an enemy vessel in combat, beginning a glorious career cut short only by the end of the w–

>oh wait, no, it sank before returning to port with all hands lost

Honestly, I'd feel safer in the Narco Sub.


cc92e4 No.490199

>>489712

underrated


eedd0b No.490219

File: 837d99df5fb1ac2⋯.png (20.02 KB, 346x364, 173:182, sweet-tea.png)

>>490190

True Dixie boys aren't afraid to get their feet wet.

Seriously though we could just steal one of those Colombian drug smuggling subs.


78d8e0 No.490222

>>490219

And mount a giant exploding spear to the front of it?


d18461 No.490238

File: 956ead50743a038⋯.jpg (56.32 KB, 699x363, 233:121, CSS_David_drawing.jpg)

>>490222

Use a shaped charge or explosively formed penetrator and detonate on impact. Eliminates the chance of being hoisted by your own petard, and also eliminates the complexity of having to detach the torpedo from the spar and retreat to a safe distance before detonating.

Also,

>semi submersible torpedo ram

>I'm just now learning about the CSS David

Why do we always end up reinventing obsolete concepts?


78d8e0 No.490239

>>490238

A shaped charge or EFP will only blow one hole in the boat and could lead to stragglers. A big ass demo charge will turn that overburdened wooden fishing trawler into a hailstorm of splinters and flying limbs.


cb652c No.490291

We could make a narco sub that has a tusk like appendage on the front to spear rapefugee boats with, but also torpedoes of some kind when dealing with heavier prey. Essentially, rebuild the Nautilus and sink the destroyers of our countries like Captain Nemo.


452cb2 No.490304

YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.

>>490291

Fuck, I like the idea. You could even build it publicly, claiming that you are just a bunch of yuge nerds who like Verne's works so much that you must built the Nautilus. Then nobody would expect a bunch of streloks to actually start cleansing the Mediterranean.


f143e5 No.490309

>>490304

FUND THIS!


98bb6e No.490310

From what I understand about the subject, the Sea Peoples were mostly displaced Mycenaean Greeks, including women and children, and mercenaries. The Sea Peoples would attempt to conquer Egypt, but failed thanks to Ramesses III's defense of the Nile. They would eventually settle throughout the Mediterranean, including Canaan, where they became known by their Egyptian name 'Peleset', or, as we would know them, the Philistines.


452cb2 No.490313

File: 5ae5c206a8481c3⋯.jpg (82.47 KB, 427x624, 427:624, Twenty_Thousand_Leagues_Un….jpg)

>>490309

Even better, here is a full "business plan":

>streloks start their own small company specializing in cheap subs for recreational purposes

>it's all Verne-themed

>start a two-front propaganda campaign

>one is for all those fucking hipsters who still put up that annoying nerd act

>other front is for those rich shitheads who like to party away their dads' money in exotic places

>both can be headed by one of those scantly-clad fake nurd grill bimbos

>start a kikestarter, sell the right to purchase pre-production models, use all those other jewish tactics to scam a lot of people without delivering anything but empty promises

>make a bunch of subs, sell them to streloks for $1 a piece

>when all those normalfags ask about this you just shrug and tell them the company went bankrupt

>meanwhile the Mediterranean is red from the blood of invaders


a1d016 No.490435

>>489560

Modern tactics would apply to skirmishers, but are a no-go for formation warfare. Fortunately, it wouldn't take much to train modern soldiers in ancient tactics. Modern marching formations are derived from old musket line formations, which are derived from pike formations, which are derived from phalanxes. Any group of professional soldiers could probably be trained with the weapons and shields in a matter of days, since the really complicated part (moving in formation, listening to movement orders called out by the NCO/officer) has already been drilled into them.

>>489436

It's really a fascinating issue, because you get out-of-context invasions every so often throughout history, and they utterly destroy the status quo.

>Ancient empires flourishing in early BC era

>Sea peoples suddenly show up out of nowhere, wreck everybody's shit, and leave again

>Nobody has any idea who they were, where they came from, why they attacked, or where they went

>A while later, the exact same shit happens, but with the Umman Manda instead of the Sea Peoples

>Nomadic tribes come from out of nowhere, wreck everybody's shit, then leave again

>A couple thousand years later, a bunch of nomadic tribes called the Huns team up and start sweeping through Asia, the Middle East, and Europe, wrecking everybody's shit

>To this day, nobody knows who the Huns actually were, and theories keep oscilating between people related to the Mongols that came later, Caucasian peoples from central Eurasia, etc.

>Hun invasion, then collapse of their short-lived empire leads to the Great Migration, which caused the collapse of the Western Roman Empire and brought about the Dark Ages

>A thousand years later, the Turks and other Muslims have been fighting the Eastern Roman Empire for centuries; they're familiar with the Byzantine culture, technology, tactics, etc.

>Byzantines start to lose the war, ask the pope for help

>Pope decides this is the perfect opportunity to get all these Anglo-Saxon, Frankish, and Germanic assholes to quit fighting each other and help out their fellow Christians

>Pope whips up a religious crusade, ordering people to go fight heathens, retake the Holy Land for Jesus, and oh yeah, all your sins are forgiven if you quit raping and pillaging each other and go rape and pillage some brown people instead

>Pope expects to get a handful of volunteers consisting of the pious and the worst of the troublemakers

>Byzantines expect a handful of mercenaries as reinforcements

>Muslims aren't expecting jack shit

>What they all got was a massive army of religious zealots and criminals who wanted that sweet get-out-of-hell-free card

>Muslims taken completely by surprise by the incredibly large army that just showed up out of nowhere with technology and tactics almost totally alien to them

>The only thing saving them from being completely BTFO is infighting amongst the Crusaders and the criminals wanting to loot the Byzantines and everywhere else they pass through on their way to killing brown people

The nearest modern equivalent would be the US invasion of Iraq in the Gulf War. They knew who the Americans were and how powerful they were, but the Americans were safely on the other side of the world and, other than selling weapons to both sides, hadn't interfered in the Iran-Iraq War or any of Iraq's other conflicts. Why would the Americans get pissy if Iraq invaded Kuwait? Besides, there's no way they could get enough of their army around the world in such a short period of time to pose a serious threat…

Then we showed up with technology way more advanced than theirs, tactics completely alien to them, and the numbers to steamroll their entire military in a matter of weeks.


452cb2 No.490448

>>490435

>To this day, nobody knows who the Huns actually were, and theories keep oscilating between people related to the Mongols that came later, Caucasian peoples from central Eurasia, etc.

Eurasian nomads are either successful and turn into Eurasian mongrels, or they are unsuccessful and get absorbed by successful groups that are turning into Eurasian mongrels. Everybody who served the current Hun ruler was a Hun himself, including even the Germanic tribes and random Greek merchants who were mingling among them. That's why they disappeared after the death of Attila: because of the infighting between his sons there wasn't a Hun ruler, thus there were no Huns.

Therefore the best you could do to answer this question is to figure out the genetics and language of the ruling families. Now, polygamy and marrying females from other groups were rather standard features of nomad societies. So for genetics your best bet is to find some paternal lines and declare them to be Hun, but that is rather "iffy", if you get what I mean. And for language, maybe you could figure out if it was Turkish, Mongolian, Iranian, or something else entirely. But even that wouldn't tell you much about their relationship with other groups that spoke related languages. And in the end of the day it's a moot point, because a random Greek could still end up as a Hun according to the standards of the Hun.


a1d016 No.490452

>>490448

We know very little about the Hun language:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hunnic_language


452cb2 No.490456

>>490452

I know, and even what we know points toward other known languages. So this is the problem with Eurasian nomads: over the centuries all became connected to some level, and all these identities have been fluid from the very first moment to begin with. I know it because this is why the history of the ancient Hungarians is such a mess.


78d8e0 No.490472

>>490313

So… We can take a narco sub and clear the cargo space usually used for cocaine to add things like an air conditioner and maybe a small refrigerator and galley consisting of a single hot plate or grill or some shit to make extended deployments a little more livable with the addition of being able to cook and store fish you catch. Extra spar torpedoes can be stored on the deck and reloaded by a pulley and a few big guys to drop a new one in the hollow holding tube and lowered back into the water. I wish this board had the oekaki app


972384 No.490488

>>490435

Second and third hand accounts agree on Atilla being bearded, and having expressive eyes. Asiatics rarely have a decent bushy beard, and their eyes can't be nearly as expressive as a european.

Aside from that we know nothing about the hunnic people, but they were likely led by a dude with Tauri heritage.

Hungarians have no tie to Atilla, except they both inhabited the Hungari plains. Might as well claim modern Macedonians have a tie to Alexander the great. Hungarian language is tied to far far later groups of asiatic invaders like Avars, with a proto-Slavic influence.


cb652c No.490491

>>490488

Descriptions of Attila basically say he was short, broad chested and having small eyes, which sound pretty mongoloid to me.

>>490452

Scholars believe that the Hunnic language may be related to the Chuvash language, and the most recent civilization game uses Chuvash for Attila's speech.


972384 No.490497

>>490491

>short

Means nothing, nutrition varied a great deal back then, as did height in Europe.

>broad chested

All bow users were.

>small eyed

Look up Western descriptions of the chinese and japanese, half the time we didnt even think they HAD eyes.


cb652c No.490526

>>490497

Here's a more in depth description, Jordanes pulling from descriptions given from a first hand account: "…Short of stature, with a broad chest and a large head; his eyes were small, his beard thin and sprinkled with grey; and he had a flat nose and tanned skin, showing evidence of his origin." I think it's likely the Huns were northern Asian nomads similar or maybe the same as the Xiongnu. We won't know unless we examine a Hunnic skull. Allegedly they enlarged their children's skulls, which should make it easier to identify a Hun. If we examine it we can guess their race by its shape: if it's Caucasoid, the Huns were likely whites or something else, if Mongoloid, likely Asian. Definitely not Negroid.


b3c020 No.490552

File: 0b9184865dca95b⋯.jpg (5.52 MB, 2480x3508, 620:877, Сергей Шойгу.jpg)

File: 733475cfe371c04⋯.jpg (73.13 KB, 420x800, 21:40, Tuvan shaman.jpg)

File: 75a4ec538146460⋯.jpg (552.03 KB, 2432x1802, 1216:901, Tuvan throat singer.jpg)

>>490488

>Hungarians have no tie to Atilla

It most likely went like this:

>Are you guys related to Attila? You know, that one warlord who still makes us shit our pants whenever we think of him?

>Of coursh!

>Hungari plains

It's usually called the Pannonian plain, although strictly speaking that only means the Transdanubian parts. The modern English name of this area is the Great Hungarian Plain. I Hungarian we just call it Alföld, literally (the) Plain.

>>490526

Here is good ol' Sergei, the current minister of defence of Russia. His mother is Russian and his father is Tuvan. Now look at him, imagine that he has a beard, and read those descriptions of Attila again.


c4d5f1 No.490568

>>490552

Yeah, I can totally see that! I guess he was likely Mongoloid then. Tuvans, like the Huns, are a Turkic people, and are related to the Mongols. Huns are believed to have come from the same area, and their language may have been Turkic/Altaic.


635cfa No.490592

>>490568

then again, it could be some ancient aryan subtribe that still remained on the steppes, mordvians, some fucked up forgotten tribe, siberian people or just a loose confederation of nomad hordes each speaking their own dialect.

and we will never have enough information to know for sure.


d2ccd7 No.490595

>>490592

>>490568

>>490552

>>490526

>>490497

>>490491

Supposedly the description of Attila is a second-hand description and almost a century after his rule.

Linguists are always fighting about whether Hunnic was Turkic, Mongolian, Iranian, Germanic, Siberian, Uralic, etc etc.

At least one source describes them as being relatively beardless, but says this is because they apply a hot iron to their children when they are young, which would obviously alter facial hair.

Does anyone think it's odd that there aren't many descriptions of the Huns? Didn't the Romans take a lot of time describing the Germans, Gauls, and other people (did they describe the Persians, Arabs, Dacians and Turks at all?)


d2ccd7 No.490596

>>490595

Man that is some odd spacing


c4d5f1 No.490604

>>490595

Yeah, there are no first hand accounts of Attila's appearance. The quote by Jordanes I cited was based off something said by an older scholar that might have been lost. Forensic facial reconstruction of Hunnic skulls show them to be Asiatic in appearance (there are three types of skulls and they had Mongoloid skulls, which belong to Asians and Native Americans)

Their language is unknown except for three words, two of which describe drinks. Hunnic names that have survived are rather Turkic sounding, although we don't know the etymology of Attila's name.


635cfa No.490606

>>490604

>Their language is unknown except for three words, two of which describe drinks.

yup, they are slavs. is that third word cyka or kurwa? its very important.

>>490596

not really, normal division by paragraphs, where message numbers are treated as a part of one paragraph due to their mass, but due to their nature and them not being proper part of response are sepparated by another line.

it makes sense.


5b5128 No.490634

>>490595

Romans took a long time describing anything not closely related to themselves.

Huns never really spoke Hunnish, except when talking to far-away tribes near China.. for all purposes, huns spoke Gothic. The more educated they were, the higher the chance they spoke Latin.

Attila did not look like the standard Hun, i forgot the source, but it says his brother Bleda was much more like a Hun than Attila, which led the question if Attila had other ancestry. Not uncommon, when Huns were pillaging everyone and selling slaves with the go sign from Romans. The biggest rivals of the Huns were the Sarmatians, to a point where their hatred was directed at each other. The last battle Attila fought had a Sarmatian king leading the frontlines against them.

If Attila sported a beard, its likely he had Gothic blood. Which again, wouldnt be uncommon at the time. His sons fighting amongst each other leads me to wonder if Attila simply followed his father's footsteps and didnt care at all for his legacy, and leave the sons to fight for his throne. And the Romans explored the tribes exactly in this context; fuel the flames of discord if they're too big, give an army to the one that likes you the most after they are too weak.


972384 No.490646

>>490552

That first picture is fucking uncanny…


635cfa No.490745

File: cee7e8a992912f0⋯.jpg (94.76 KB, 500x749, 500:749, ancient nomads.jpg)

>>490634

>fought against sarmatians

yup, they are russians, case closed we can go home


f03d61 No.490765

>>490435

>Modern tactics would apply to skirmishers, but are a no-go for formation warfare.

That was exactly my point. Anyone who didn't read the "turn up in bronze age phalanx gear, replicator specs attached to this message" section of the invite would be deployed as skirmishers and sent in a disorganised charge against the enemy formation. This would have a ridiculously high mortality rate and would very rapidly make people turning up in the wrong kit a self-solving problem.

As for the effectiveness of formation/phalanx it would basically all come down to drill and discipline. Yeah I can see /k/ommandos having trouble with that, it's the sort of thing that makes even modern formation marching look disorgansied, but if a regular group was having say weekly meets they should be able to work out their formations within a month or two of part-time/recreational training - especially considering that the majority of combatants at that stage of history would citizen volunteers/levy rather than professional soldiers. Battlefield experience would add to their capabilities rather rapidly. It could be interesting to try and improve on the phalanx tictacs and gear, although I doubt we'd be able to do more than the original users were able to do with a few thousand years of R&D if we were sticking to bronze age technology.


1353a5 No.490769

File: 3ff52d6c767d793⋯.jpg (62.05 KB, 457x480, 457:480, 1387127697749.jpg)

The greatest mystery is where flag related went.


7cc0b8 No.490835

>>490769

Unfortunately, FYROM still exists.


80eb70 No.490942

>>489639

Here's a grand idea: bomb containers. Just have a bunch of guys within the formation holding explosive-resistant bowls to catch the bombs in.


972384 No.490960

>>490769

>>490835

Its a large family that spread their last sons across the middle east where they either died with no children or had mixed half nigger kids.

Then all the females left in their kingdom got raped for 2000 years by Greeks, Romans, Huns, Romans, Mongols, Gauls, Romans Avars and Slavs.

And then a bunch of mongrel Kurds got brought over by Turkey and claimed they Wuz Alexander.


635cfa No.490973

>>490960

they have as good claim of being macedonian as "holy" "roman" "empire" has of being roman


539737 No.491044

File: ef738211fb9938f⋯.png (393.89 KB, 1200x565, 240:113, e96c8ff81dd8a0ea22fac09d40….png)

>>490973

Voltaire shut your cheesy fucking frog mouth, no one cares about your fucking pamphlets deriding the autism that was medieval germany


a1d016 No.491238

>>490491

Whereas Genghis Khan was described by contemporary accounts as having reddish hair and green eyes, features apparently common amongst the Mongols of that time period.

Mummies and DNA show that the original inhabitants of China were whites, who died out over time when the ancestors of the modern Chinese migrated from Siberia. At some point, Turkic tribes also migrated into China to become the modern Uighurs.

Clearly that region is a clusterfuck of race mixing and competition.


635cfa No.491249

>>491238

>uiyghurs

>turks

>not aryans


29a265 No.491270

File: 80d1b94d0e3f70b⋯.png (105.17 KB, 1600x660, 80:33, Finns and co sacking a som….png)

>>491238

>Clearly that region is a clusterfuck of race mixing and competition.

That's true about all of the Eurasian steppes and all areas neighbouring it. And by all I mean even Persia got visited by friendly nomad hordes time-to-time.


d2ccd7 No.491275

>>491270

Y-Haplogroups seem to show that only a few areas got hit hard by this.

Remember that nomads were usually vastly outnumbered by the population, even after conquest.

Also, lots of nomad groups like the Mongols would simply kill after raping, so there was no offspring.


3b4c0b No.491297

>>491044

>deriding the autism that is germany

FTFY


941ecb No.491393

File: 63d1bb3054e75d4⋯.png (318.96 KB, 743x531, 743:531, 1449950306551.png)

>>491275

>so, lots of nomad groups like the Mongols would simply kill after raping, so there was no offspring.

for what purpose?


88b7de No.491397

>>491393

I don't think the Mongols want angry rape babies coming after them in the future.


668f6b No.491414

File: c8a7239957d266f⋯.jpg (28.11 KB, 361x361, 1:1, 20years.jpg)

>>491393

Have you never heard of the Alimony daemon?


9345a8 No.491443

File: 03c5230594fbe76⋯.png (Spoiler Image, 183.1 KB, 500x334, 250:167, nosepencils.png)

>>489726

>Adam Gopnik

Rush B.C. at 1177 cyka blyat

Idi Nahui


941ecb No.491459

>>491414

but they could just raugh and jump on their ponies and ride away? you should know


1404e4 No.491479

>>491459

>be mongol gook chilling in plains after raid on europe

>got lots of pusi

>suddenly letters for compensation since birthed so many half gooks

>pony bank account gets drained by gov

>sad


d2ccd7 No.491502

>>491393

The Mongols were not famous for carrying a lot of baggage. I can't imagine they wanted to carry entire families with them. On top of that, some of them who DID bring their families with them probably did not want to bring foreign women who were conquered into their already-existing family.

I read once that the Mongols would usually either spare a city if they cooperated fully, or wipe them out for resisting at all. Therefore, letting people live afterwards wouldn't have as much of a warning effect to other cities that might rebel or resist.

To be fair, I have also read that a lot of the instances of Mongol brutality may never have happened or might have been rumors propagated by the Mongols themselves to encourage faster surrenders and less resistance.

I'm not an expert, so anyone who knows more, please correct any incorrect things I may have written.


941ecb No.491511

>>491502

>if you don't kill them you have to capture them

I'm not saying they didn't do some of everything, I just can't picture a conquering army/horde killing all the women after the raping.


2059c6 No.491513

>>491502

>mongols dindu nuffin

Nope. We have archeological evidence of them committing legit genocide in the Tangut Empire, Hungarian Kingdom, Russia, Khwarezmia, Manchuria, etc.


d2ccd7 No.491517

>>491511

Well, they wiped out the entire city.

>>491513

I'm not saying that they didn't, but it was also probably exaggerated Some of the claims that can be read just seem ridiculous, like this.

"The total population of Persia may have dropped from 2,500,000 to 250,000 as a result of mass extermination and famine"

If this is true, why did Persia remain incredibly important militarily and economically in the form of the Timurid (and then the Safavids) afterwards? You don't experience a bounce-back like that over a few generations.

Also, the Mongols were supposed to be incredibly brutal and use excessive force against occupied peoples who resisted them. Yet, the peoples of the North Caucasus (Chechens, etc) resisted them while under occupation and managed to negotiate them. This was an incredibly important area, and yet the Mongols didn't seem to just gather an army, go in, and crush everyone.

I'm sure their reputation of being violent was real, but still probably exaggerated by quite a bit.


635cfa No.491519

>>491517

on the other hand, they eradicated whole race of chinks.


d2ccd7 No.491521

>>491519

Don't the Chinese have massive population drops on a regular basis due to revolutions and civil wars?

In fact, during the Mongol invasions of China, entire armies were formed of Chinese defectors. So many of these battles were….Chinese fighting Chinese.


182fcb No.491526

File: b52b2b06aa6a8df⋯.jpg (69.62 KB, 500x500, 1:1, Spartan_Phalanx_Large.jpg)


972384 No.491528

>>491517

>we reduced native population by 90% through disease

>how come we had to fight 100 year insurgency with them???


d2ccd7 No.491530

>>491528

Because these areas were not fully under US control yet. The push westwards was a grind. The Indians were not attacking from soil that was physically occupied by Americans yet, even though it was American on the map.


972384 No.491533

>>491530

That was a complete non-sequitur response.


d2ccd7 No.491535

>>491533

I think we are just having a misunderstanding :)


635cfa No.491585

>>491521

population drops are normal, total destruction of the whole race isnt.


2fa775 No.491595

>>491519

What made those chinks different than the ones we have now?


d2ccd7 No.491621

>>491585

Which race was destroyed?

The Chinese are still around


635cfa No.491622

>>491621

i forgot but i remember reading about this

also chinks are not one race, han chinese is just one (the largest)group.


972384 No.491624

>>491595

China used to have as many nations as Europe, now theres only the Han and the Muslim Han (hui).

Imagine if Germans conquered Europe in WWII untio only Germans and German Muslims (turk) were left on the whole continent.

The amount of history and culture lost in China is staggering.


d2ccd7 No.491625

>>491622

>>491622

The Mongols und Genghis Khan did the whole "kill people taller than a wheel" thing to a few competing Mongol tribes at the beginning.

>>491622

>han chinese is just one (the largest)group.

They are supposedly well over 90% of China's population.

"According to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary, the Han are "the Chinese peoples especially as distinguished from non-Chinese (as Mongolian) elements in the population.""

>>491624

>now theres only the Han and the Muslim Han

No, China still has tons of different ethnic groups. Furthermore, the Han have pretty much always been the vast vast VAST majority anyways.

Furthermore, the Hui are matched by an approximately equal number of Uyghurs ( who are Turkic), at least according to some Chinese census.

>The amount of history and culture lost in China is staggering.

True, a lot of texts, documents, and libraries were destroyed.


d2ccd7 No.491626


635cfa No.491627

File: 0788448a51d3b55⋯.png (116.8 KB, 1024x749, 1024:749, ebin.png)


972384 No.491628

>>491625

>the Han have pretty much always been the vast vast VAST majority anyways.

You sound like a salty Ham.

I mean Han…


d2ccd7 No.491631

>>491628

Well, haven't the Han always been over 90% of the Chinese population?

I'm just making this point to show that the Mongols didn't "ethnically cleanse" populations.

They were brutal, yes, but a lot of their brutality is exaggerated. I mean, were they really more brutal than what invading Turkic and other Central Asian armies did at the time? I don't think so. Just more successful.


eedd0b No.491634

File: a0289a395fcd45e⋯.jpg (134.48 KB, 900x602, 450:301, Montreal.jpg)

File: 39946c3c12c999b⋯.jpg (46.85 KB, 450x300, 3:2, Normal canadians.jpg)

File: 29ba41a601a05b8⋯.jpg (41.71 KB, 743x632, 743:632, Normal Leaf.jpg)

>>491528

>>491533

>>491624

>>491628

>Canada knowledgeable about China

Every time.


73f639 No.491649

File: 442ed8549586971⋯.png (27.34 KB, 477x387, 53:43, 442ed8549586971bc5001e847b….png)

>>491624

>Hui

Now that is some enemy i could laugh at. I wonder if their war chant was "IDI HUI"


635cfa No.491656

>>491649

*idi na hui

or

*idi v hui

to all russians:fuck off i never learned russian, i just know.


00f3c6 No.491663

>>491634

I rather hate hans chinese, practically all of them are assholes who always speak bad english and pretend they know how to read english better then you because they get 50 cents off a coupon if you agree with them. They hire mechanics, then when the bill comes they refuse to pay and will simply go to the next guy on their list for the next problem, so many mechanics and engineers refuse to work for them as a rule.


73f639 No.491672

>>491656

I never did too

Latvianon reporting in


a760d9 No.491829

File: 45c875e19b1b4e7⋯.mp4 (1.41 MB, 640x360, 16:9, AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.mp4)

>>491663

too bad justin or the rest of this shit hole doesn't think like you




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