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File: 1456025154769.jpg (142.94 KB, 750x1000, 3:4, 779da34273a0de8f8cd2aadc04….jpg)

 No.27185

Yeah, who the hell needs friends anyway. If I've spent most of my younger days without even knowing how it really feels, I can do it again just fine.

All they've ever done was remind me of how much I've missed out, make me realize just how easily I get lonely, and turn me into a fucking wuss who can't handle rejection.

There's probably a legit reason why I locked my emotions so deep inside along with the rest of the unburnable trash, because they're gross and they remind me of how much of an insecure piece of shit I actually am.

Yet those people dug it out anyway while spouting bullshit like we need you anon, we love you no matter what anon, you're a great person anon, all after I made it clear that I fucking dislike myself to the core.

For all I know, the sweeter they are to me, the closer they get to me, the more secure they make me feel around them, the more they manage to gain my trust, it's only going to amplify the pain the moment when they're going to inevitably leave me.

I don't care.

 No.27187

File: 1456026342073.jpg (76.8 KB, 480x542, 240:271, 1444184414181.jpg)

Woah friend, looks like you're having a breakdown, that's not good!

Some advice: don't take life and yourself too seriously, fuck everyone and never forget to take it easy


 No.27193

File: 1456034278483.jpeg (82.69 KB, 800x800, 1:1, image.jpeg)

You're gonna need to elaborate Anon. I mean I get that feeling of self-loathing and not wanting attachment, I really do, but this has clearly come to a head somehow. What forces these connections (not that I encourage detachment) and what just happened to make you type this up? What is it about your emotions that has got you so upset? How about that bit about rejection (I thought you were getting too popular)?


 No.27219

>>27193

>What is it about your emotions that has got you so upset?

I'm not used to feel strong emotions, I guess. I grew up and think of it as something to suppress, so I did and try to cancel out any strong feelings I get with stoicism. I displayed emotions as a kid, and I was shamed for it, so I stopped. I'm also really bad at forming relationships, so this really helped as a shock-absorber and all my life I've only felt attraction three times.

But they told me it's okay to be myself and I should never hide my true feelings. So, take a wild guess when the two out of the three times started happening again.

> How about that bit about rejection

I was never good at handling rejection, so I singled myself out so that people don't have to push me away, and I made myself forget how it feels to have a sense of belonging. So I made myself content with being in my own world.

But then I made real friends and I just…

>What forces these connections

Some guy just had to reach out for me and "see something in me that's more than meets the eye", that person just had to get out of his way just to painstakingly lead me out of my shell. After that, things just continued on and I almost became a normal person.

>and what just happened to make you type this up?

I was happy that I finally got friends. I could finally drop my act and stop acting like I'm stronger than I actually am, drop my guard and be myself. I was happy that I finally got to know people who actually care about me and I almost forgotten of all my troubles.

Lately though I've been a bit troubled. I feel like they've stopped caring as much about me. I'm the irrational one here, but fuck me guys, what the hell am I supposed to do if I start losing them? Crawl back into the hole back where I came from? After all that had been done to me?


 No.27227

File: 1456068332713-0.png (2.61 MB, 1920x1080, 16:9, Dankey1.png)

File: 1456068332728-1.png (2.76 MB, 1920x1080, 16:9, Dankey2.png)

>>27219

>Lately though I've been a bit troubled. I feel like they've stopped caring as much about me.

Could it be that your fears Trump reality?

From your post, I get the impression that the fear and anxiety leading up to a potential rejection is worse for you than the rejection itself. I could be wrong about this, but it resembles the way I feel. I avoid risks so I don't have to be anxious about said risks, not necessarily to avoid the potential consequences.

Rejection is harshest when it stems from something which you hate about yourself. Are your more extreme emotions unwanted / undesirable? Could you describe them?

The reason I say this is that, if someone would reject you for you, then they were never really your friend in the first place. It's a simple matter of finding someone who is similar or sympathetic enough that you two can genuinely relate.


 No.27230

File: 1456071122097.jpeg (86.04 KB, 319x450, 319:450, image.jpeg)

>>27219

How confused would you say you are about what it means to have relationships with people? Do you have some concept in mind that you feel you're not acheiving or maybe are you fretting over all the different ideas you can't come up with an answer for? That would be understandable considering the lousy upbringing you mentioned but know that people overall have trouble understanding eachother's feelings and nobody's perfect.

Putting the anxiety aside you clearly have a low opinion of yourself and that's surely helping you convince yourself something is going wrong and it's your fault. Do you have any reasoning to think this you'd like to share? Maybe you could tell us how you met your friend(s), why you think that relationship started, where it seems to be going and why that is.


 No.27236

File: 1456076680959.jpg (261.69 KB, 567x700, 81:100, 123.jpg)

>>27219

I think I get what you're saying. You don't try so you don't fail. But, in the words of a man who is often misquoted, if you don't fight, you've already lost.

You've mentioned somebody who actively guided you out of your shell. Have you tried asking him explicitly for comfort, or explaining your situation to him? If he is the kind of person you're describing him as, I'm sure he'll understand.

It's unlikely that people you spend a lot of time with don't realize that something is wrong, but they may remain passive or distance themselves from you out of similar considerations like the one you're entertaining.


 No.27267

File: 1456162605206.jpg (119.79 KB, 736x1040, 46:65, 87ce3e9b19f2e9f1a000ae9810….jpg)

>>27219

I'm not sure if op is even with us any longer, but regardless, I wanted to say something in regards to this situation.

Once I was like you, or rather, still am really. Fear ruled my life, I couldn't bring myself to do anything that was beyond my own little world. I drowned myself in fiction and fantasy. I brainwashed myself to believe I was happy where I was in life. I was the lone wolf, the individual, one who was without need of belonging or purpose beyond my own selfish delusions. All I ever did was kid myself, and deep down I always knew I was from the beginning.

As a hobby I would write shitty fetish stories and post them online, if only so my "creative" pursuits never went to waste. Then coincidentally I got a pm from someone saying that they really appreciated my works and hoped to see more from me. I thanked them properly for their compliment and went about my way. But they didn't end it there, as they pm'd me again asking if I role played. I was dumbfounded, not having the experience of dealing with interaction of this type. Already my anxiety flared up, I immediately assumed the worst. But despite it all I opened up myself and allowed them to teach and guide me through it. We got together and did a few sessions where upon they convinced me to open up a skype account so that we could interact more beyond stories which where separate from our true selves.

Thus began me first friendship in nearly 10 years. She pushed me to reach out, to help touch others who were similar to my current situation. I put myself out there despite my better judgment, and before I knew it I had surrounded myself with a circle of friends who I knew cared about me and wanted to see me do better.

But it wasn't enough. My fears overcame any sort of rationality I had. "They don't care, they don't want me to succeed, I'm just wasting everyone's time." I blew up and broke down. I gave everyone I had met a vague goodbye message, which must have read more like some sort of suicide note, explaining that my current situation wasn't one that allowed me to interact in such ways anymore. Most responded with a sad but understanding goodbye, wishing me luck and happiness as I went my separate way. But I just couldn't let it end like that, to finish it off I had sent one last message to the person who had allowed opportunity to put myself out there in the first place. The last thing I said to her wasn't anything coherent, just paragraph after paragraph of needless anger and frustration, all of it thrusted unfairly at the person who had only wanted me to become more social and outgoing and see me better myself.

I abandoned the account, never knowing if she said anything and if so what it was to begin with.

Recovering from it all a few months later, I tried again, opening up a second account and seeing if I could form for myself another network of caring friends who were willing to have me as their friend in spite of my shittyness. Most people I reached out to slowly disappeared from my contacts, whether on their own accord or mine. But the few who stayed and were willing to take the time and befriend me, I cherish them everyday and wouldn't trade them for anything in the world. But my past actions still haunted me, and I often wonder what became of those I had left behind.

If you're so afraid of losing them, then such fear which you've admit to being irrational is the quickest you'll ever come to just that. So many friendships I've jeopardized because of my own fears, please don't let yourself lose those who've come to aid you because you feel like they've stopped caring.

I highly suggest you head the words of the past kind anons who have offered you their thoughts, especially the point of confronting those you fear losing about those exact fears. Just be sure to explain yourself clearly and make sure to never lash out at them. Any friend worth their salt should be more than willing to allow you a chance to open up about such insecurities, as well as be willing to aid you and help work with you until such fears are overcame.


 No.27295

>>27267

wanna share your skype anon? I'm looking for people to chat with when I inevitably start getting lonely all the time


 No.27312

File: 1456199142301.jpg (188.37 KB, 600x397, 600:397, sad-dog.jpg)

>>27267

That's really saddening, friend. Did you every try to re-establish contact with your old friends? Simply logging into your old account, or messaging them from your new one?

I feel like you owe your old friends that much. Especially the person you snapped at. Who knows what they wrote back? Or if they still think about you, and what they could have possibly done to make you so upset.


 No.27317

Oh dear, I must apologies to the op as i hadn't intended to derail the thread into my own problems.

>>27295

I'm a bit surprised that such a treacherous tale of myself would warrant someone into seeking my companionship, but I'm simply unable to deny a fellow anon a chance for some company.

skype account: aquajack4

>>27312

I couldn't do it personally, after how I acted the notion that anyone would want anything to do with me was simply out of the question for me.

However, in spite of it all, she did eventually end up contacting me through the website we had met up on originally. We still talk on occasion, but I feel as though I've forever tainted our friendship, which sort of dampers my mood whenever we do talk as I will never stop feeling guilty about it. Our last conversation ended with her telling me how proud of me she was and how happy it made her to see the personal growth I had made since then. So there's a bit of a happy end I suppose.

As for everyone else I haven't the slightest idea as to what's become of them since then…


 No.27325

>>27317

OP here. No, it's fine, anon. If anything I needed to thank you for sharing your experience.

I was being extremely irrational, I'm aware of that. But these days it's been especially bad for me, my mental state has been really unstable.

Let me explain.

I'm getting episodes in escalating frequency of mental breakdowns. In that state, I get really anxious and paranoid. I experience strong sadness and frustration, and often I trick myself into believing my own lies and delusions which stems from my own insecurities and self-loathing. I get sad over things that are not even true, I get irrationally angry over things that never happened, and my anxiety has gotten so bad that I'm practically can't function in public social situations anymore (granted I was never good at socializing, but it has never been such a big problem before and I had better control over it). Sometimes I wake up in mornings and I regret that I even woke up at all.

Sure enough, I talked to one of my friends and it's pretty clear that what I thought in the beginning in this thread was all in my head. But during my episodes, I won't be able to think as clearly as now; hell I doubt I could even make any rational deductions at all. And I won't notice if I'm getting into one of my episodes until someone points it out to me or until it's over. One time, I was acting really distant and out of character (in a bad way) for almost a week and I didn't notice until one of my friends had a word with me.

But these guys, they're my first true friends who actually care for me, and they're the people I can truly connect with for the first time in my life and they had made a very significant impact in my life. And I can't afford to lose them.

I have no idea what's happening to me or was it caused by how I grew up as one of the anons here had mentioned. But I know this won't be the last time, it will happen again, and it can even be worse. It's as if I'm slowly losing my mind, and I don't know what's going on or if I can do anything about it.


 No.27326

File: 1456244119556.jpg (64.71 KB, 930x799, 930:799, 1445843132340-0.jpg)

>>27325

Well, I'm glad to know my silly story was able to help in some little way.

Listen, my heart really does go out to you, hearing stories like this just tears me up on the inside and makes me wish such problems where much easier to fix than they actually are.

If you'd like for something to direct your negative feelings towards so that you don't blow up on your close friends, I'd be more than willing to take the fallout for them.

I don't want you to feel obligated for anything, nor do I want to forcefully inject myself between you and your already close relationships. But if you would like for someone you can release yourself onto, then please feel free to hit up the Skype I posted, or I can share my junk email account if skype isn't something you use, and then go from there.


 No.27362

File: 1456323189704.png (285.8 KB, 800x600, 4:3, 598eb9467394b6d614570f85e5….png)

>>27326

Thank you, anon. But I'm afraid I'll need time to think about it…

I'm sure the information I've said here have said it all, but I'm terrible with strangers, even online. But please, don't take this the wrong way; I really appreciate your offer and I'm very happy that you're willing to reach out for me. It's just that it's vert difficult, almost painful, for me to talk to someone new.

I just don't want us to share contacts only for me to fall quiet most of, if not all the time because of my social phobia.

I'm VERY sorry, I really am.


 No.27372

File: 1456342226310.jpg (23.32 KB, 250x353, 250:353, 97ebbfc5c34bc8b799828943d5….jpg)

>>27362

There's no reason to apologies, I completely understand. As I said before, the last thing I want is for you to feel forced into something you're not comfortable with.

Just know that I really do wish the best for you and your endeavors. I realize words only go so far, but as someone who would most likely no longer be with us if it hadn't been for the close friends I've made, I also understand just how much of a difference a little empathy can make.

If you ever change your mind, though, remember that the door will always be unlocked. And this also goes out to any other anons out there who've happened to stumble upon this. I'm no miracle worker, or really the best at giving advice, but if you're feeling lonely, scared, depressed, sad, hopeless, or whatever else it may be that ails you, I won't promise that I'll be able to solve all of your problems, but I will do my best to at least provide you with some compassion and comfort. [spolier] If anyone does decide to hit me up, all I ask is that you put a message letting me know you're from /kind/ so that I don't mistake you for a bot. [/spoiler]

Good luck out there, op. It's not a very nice world we live in, but we all have to do our best and stick it out regardless. Keep your chin up, remember those who are most important to you, and never lose sight of the things that give you the most strength.




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