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/lds/ - Latter-day Saints

Whosoever shall put their trust in God shall be supported in their trials, and their troubles, and their afflictions, and shall be lifted up at the last day
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/ara/ - Mothercon

January 2019 - 8chan Transparency Report
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File: d305233355bda2d⋯.jpg (174.01 KB, 649x917, 649:917, JosephSmith.jpg)


post about anything here



No it's none of that imaginary crap you just said. It's you and your weakness. Go ask the top guy at your church why he's in that spot? Because they won't give that job to a sissy. You don't like the word sissy, pick a better one for me to use. Only you can decide if you are a man or a woman. I'm sorry if you don't like that but it's the truth.

If you want me to work with you, I want you to meditate twice a day for 10 minutes. Sit comfortably so you won't go to sleep, close your eyes, and let whatever happens happen, just breath and don't move. Set an alarm for 10 min.

You won't like what you see at first but don't give up, keep the meditation everyday, I promise it will help you. I would advise you to keep a journal of your meditation appointments, after each time write a paragraph or two, so you can track your progress.

No excuses :^)

I'll know when we can start talking again.


Don't punish yourselves, just do the meditation, no excuses. :^)

…and we'll talk about it later.



In religious terms, it's Satan taking a chance at his weak moments. Why such the focus on meditation though? I practice it sometimes but I need to up it.


A resisted temptation is not a sin, but a test of virtue.

~Thomas Mann



Boyd K. Packer

Of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles

It was an experience to hear President Joseph Fielding Smith pray. Even when he was past ninety he would pray that he would “keep his covenants and obligations and endure to the end.” The word covenant is the subject of my message.

The Lord told the ancients, “With thee will I establish my covenant.” (Gen. 6:18.) He told the Nephites, “Ye are the children of the covenant.” (3 Ne. 20:26.) And he described the restored gospel as the “new and … everlasting covenant.” (D&C 22:1; italics added.) Every Latter-day Saint is under covenant. Baptism is a covenant; so is the sacrament. Through it we renew the covenant of baptism and commit to “always remember him and keep his commandments.” (D&C 20:77.)



Meditation is the mirror of your soul, and when you sit quietly with yourself , you are forced to polish the mirror.


When you get what you want in your struggle for self. And the world makes you king for a day. Then go to the mirror and look at yourself. And see what that man has to say. For it isn't a man's father, mother or wife. Whose judgement upon him must pass. The fellow whose verdict counts most in life. Is the man staring back in the glass. He's the fellow to please, never mind all the rest. For he's with you clear to the end. And you've passed your most dangerous, difficult test. If the man in the glass is your friend. You can fool the whole world down the pathway of years. And get pats on the back as you pass. But the final reward will be heartache and tears. If you've cheated the man in the glass.


It's happening

Even through all my failure my plan is working. I've gotten closer to multiple girls just today. I'm starting to build a circle of female friends, and it's amazing. After church I sat with the girl that rejected me at our potluck and talked to her for a bit. Then during the devotional broadcast I sat with another girl and she wanted to sing along with the hymns. She noticed me looking at her hymn book, and shared it with me. So we got real close together and sang along with the hymns. At first we were the only ones in the chapel singing along, but then the bishop and the other people behind us joined in. I got a girls # today, and spent time with her after church. And the girl I minister to is always super happy to see me. Hugs every time.

I think I've finally started to accomplish what I was hoping to achieve in the beginning when I first started introducing myself to every girl in the ward. I'm finally starting to make real connections with them.


Last bottle. This will be over after tonight.



I was wrong. I have a bottle and my parents have a bottle. The wine my parents drink is some nasty ass shit. Way too sweet.




Black out black out



I'm glad. Shit dude you need to lay off the booze ASAP. The molly thing really got me worried. I had to pray for you.



Don't worry too much, it's over now. I got rekt last night off all that alcohol and passed out. No more.



>The molly thing really got me worried

It just shows how destructive alcohol is. The only way that even came into my mind again was because I was so far gone that I didn't know what I was doing.


Yeah, I'm glad that you're cutting that crap out. Do it less often, and whenever you drink, just have a beer or so.

On another topic, I'm terrible at coming onto women. At least online. I talk way too much.



Off-topic, look at this Discord conversation from an unknown background that a friend sent to me:

edit: lets try to keep this board cleaner than this

Post last edited at



All that does is make me want to kill every single non white person in my country. Edited to remove because it's extremely vulgar and this is a safe for work board, or was intended to be.



Yeah, it was very, very ill.



Also found something out, outside the framework of religion. Or somewhat. Ever since I started to be a nicer person to people I've only got bad results. Mostly to the opposite sex, as in a good person. All that happens when you're good to other people is that you're thrown into a pile of shit. I learned this the hard way in the 5th grade and only baptism helped me free myself from that restraint. Maybe it's time to lock myself in that restraint again. People are inherently selfish and being good will just lead you to get hurt massively.



There's no room for kindness in this world.


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You're wrong.



When I was an egoist I was never attacked. Now that I'm nice like I used to be when I was a kid, it's like people are out to get me like attack dogs. There's no room for altruism and kindness in this world.



So you need to feel sorry for yourself today, too much tension. Get some sleep you'll feel better tomorrow.

Don't forget your meditation, it's the highest form of prayer, it's important.

Take care





I disagree. I don't have much to say right now, but I do have a scripture to share.




Paul, Apostle of Christ (2018) - HD 1080p

Rating: 6.7


The story covers Paul going from the most infamous persecutor of Christians to Jesus Christ's most influential apostle.


Don't forget your meditation, it's the highest form of prayer, it's important.

Take care


More whining incoming: I can't seem to leave coffee. I just want to have a fun day without being tired so I just drink it. Also, the vape kills my brain fog so I just use it too.

I'm buying 1.5mg vape juice instead of 3mg tomorrow. Maybe that'll help a bit. But the coffee….I don't know, maybe I should just stop without thinking, start being a zombie a few days. It's the only way I'll gain weight and start thinking more clearly. This is cancer. It's terrible, I need to get it out of the way



Use caffeine pills.

decrease dosage over time

Even if you keep using them, its better than coffee.


This has been a long week so far. I went to look back at how many days I've been clean off of alcohol, and it's only been 4 days. It feels like 2 weeks. I have the urge to get more especially because holidays are coming, and holidays are generally tough for me. I know I have to fight it though.


i just stopped to check in and let you know i was alive and well. my back/leg troubles are mysteriously absent, as if nothing ever happened a few months ago. i've all but abandoned the chans, and am keeping occupied with video games instead. tbh, i'm happy with the decision.


do the best you can, hex. if my drug of choice were legal and available for purchase in every store, i think i would probably struggle with it more than i do.


>I think I've finally started to accomplish what I was hoping to achieve in the beginning when I first started introducing myself to every girl in the ward

nice. it's good to see hard work pay off.


>I need to be around better people




I well, left coffee for two days and it's worked well. My thinking is way much more clear. However, I caved in with vaping and even bought a new one. I think I'll just use it whenever I do have severe brain fog and put it away whenever I don't need it.

It's just perfect for napping, but other than that, it's fucking trash. Absolute trash.


Chans are toxic, mostly with all the pornography and degeneracy in there. I'm glad that your pain issues are gone. It sure took a while.


Currently posting at a Mormon friend's bday party while the food settles down, I ate way too much. I'll probably sing later



>my back/leg troubles are mysteriously absent, as if nothing ever happened a few months ago

Glad to hear that.

>if my drug of choice were legal and available for purchase in every store

If I had access to the other stuff I wanted I'd be so much worse off than I am right now. Now it's just resisting the urge to do it all over again. And it's tempting with the holiday coming up. I have a really hard time during the holidays, and I'll have time off work. I hope Sunday makes me feel a bit better than I did today. Work was pretty miserable, and it felt like it dragged on forever.



It's still Saturday though! So that's a good thing, the day's still going on.

I'm happy that everyone here's doing relatively well, and if there's a small misstep, it's quickly corrected. Our lives are better as Latter-day Saints, our mistakes would go on and on if we didn't have the safety net of God.


Just paid off my cell phone all at once instead of doing payments, hopefully this encourages me to save money rather than waste it on bullshit like alcohol. $1000 out the window just like that. That one hurts. That's more than I made on my last paycheck.


>and if there's a small misstep, it's quickly corrected

My misstep was a pretty big one that lasted a couple weeks. I'm going to really focus on not letting that happen again, and try to get myself back together. Start achieving goals again, instead of making them and then not even attempting to achieve them. My schedule is making it difficult since it's so inconsistent, but if I could get into a routine I think my happiness would increase. The part that will be difficult is that this routine will have to come at the cost of sleep. Getting out of bed in the morning has been so hard lately for multiple reasons. Not getting enough sleep, depression, etc.



>Just paid off my cell phone all at once

Bastards would only offer me $20 for my iphone 5 too. Looks like I have a new mp3 player. The last time I traded in an iphone I got $200. I bet the thing is worth more than $20 in scrap material.



>hopefully this encourages me to save money rather than waste it on bullshit

besides the new otterbox i just bought for that old iphone. the otterbox for the iphone 5 makes it a tank, mine was completely destroyed from years of abuse but the phone came out of it looking like it was fresh out of the box. i threw that case away because it was falling apart, and i was expecting to sell the phone but spending $20 to give my mp3 player some fall protection seems like a decent idea. i actually like this idea better than using my new phone as my mp3 player when i work out since i worry about it falling out of my pocket when i do leg curls and stuff. my new phone can be my mp3 player at work where i don't have to worry about it falling out of my pocket.


I've decided to create a new lifting routine. I used to do this pretty often when I first started lifting, and I'd switch things up to keep it fresh. Once I got serious with lifting, I stopped creating new routines and just mixed it up on the fly. This was OK when I was dedicated. I'm not anymore, so I think the solution to that is investing the time to create a routine. The problem I've been facing lately is that if I do end up working out, I try to come up with a routine on the fly and end up not doing as much as I should. Or, even worse, not doing it at all.

So right now I'm going to set a routine that goes for 6 days. I may tone it down, and add in cardio later but for now I need to get on a very strict routine. I also need to set a time when I go to bed every night. I'm thinking right after work I'll make some herbal tea, and maybe take a melatonin supplement. I'll have computer time while the tea cools enough to drink, and after I finish the cup I will go to bed immediately. I'd say 1:30 AM at the latest. This means I should be in bed early enough to get up around 9:30-10 AM. I should not be in bed later than 10 AM. In the morning I will make breakfast, take my pre-workout supplement, and begin scripture study.

This should give me 30 minutes to 1 hour of scripture study per morning, and leave me with plenty of time to work out afterwards. After that I will still have time to shower, and relax in front of my computer for a little while before I have to leave for work. If I could accomplish this, it would change things quite a bit. Lately I get out of bed between 11:30-12:30 PM. Usually on the later end of this range This schedule change would give me a couple extra hours.




7.5 MB

Chris Ryan has reached peak physical condition. After years of intensive training by experts in the SAS he has learnt to attain a level of total fitness that improves his performance in all aspects of life. Now he has adapted techniques and honed his routines to devise a three-month programme that's both extremely easy and effective for males of all ages and lifestyles. He combines endurance training and work-outs for strength and suppleness with a guide to nutrition and all-round health maintenance for men. All the exercises will be photographed in full colour in this easy-to-follow guide. He also provides training programmes for longer and shorter timescales, specifically aimed at weight loss or weight gain, in addition to giving nutritional advice from the experts to maximise the success of the exercise plans.



File: cd3de6f95be3036⋯.jpg (100 KB, 747x810, 83:90, Planks.jpg)

I think the church should really encourage getting fit.

In my singles ward 65% of the women are obese.

only about 30% of the guys are what I would call overweight.

I would rather be single than marry a morbidly obese woman. And it is not just the aesthetics of it. It is a reflection of how they care for themselves and the effort that they put into things.


Did I just get asked on a date? That girl I minister to asked me to go to breakfast with her sometime during the week possibly Thursday. I told her that sounded great, and she said she would text me. I'm still trying to process everything that has happened. All I know is things are changing for me with girls.



>All I know is things are changing for me with girls.

Your updates have been motivating me to do the same.

I sat next to a girl in sacrament and shared a hymn book.



>I sat next to a girl in sacrament and shared a hymn book.

That's how it starts. Keep doing it. I've tried to sit with a different girl every week for months now, and I'm finally starting to see the results.


Is it bad that even though a girl wants to go to breakfast with me that my mind won't get off of this other girl? You would think this would be the sign I needed to move on from her, but my feelings are stronger than ever that there is something I need to do


Shid I haven't been here for a while


>$1000 out the window just like that.

Damn, that was expensive. That's why I always settled for cheap booze if the purpose was to get drunk.

>I'm going to really focus on not letting that happen again, and try to get myself back together. Start achieving goals again, instead of making them and then not even attempting to achieve them.

After I started to quit or lower my nicotine intake and caffeine intake I've been more goal oriented. It feels amazing. It's also the meds working I guess? But you can make it, just give it a bit of time and focus on yourself and nobody else. Praise yourself as a demigod, as blasphemous as that sounds. We're going to be Gods eventually.

>Getting out of bed in the morning has been so hard lately for multiple reasons. Not getting enough sleep, depression, etc.

Feel ya.


I have an iPhone 6 just laying there, not getting sold, accumulating dust. They would probably give me a good 300 but I just don't ever focus on getting money since I have all my needs paid for at the moment. Which is kind of embarrassing, but my parents are telling me to focus on college instead of getting a job, with the depression it would be too much to do both things at once, according to them and my history with the disease.


I encourage you getting a Sansa Clip.


Man, I need to begin to lift. But first I need to gain optimal weight, BMI wise, since I'm skinny. After that and nicotine for fat burning, I'm good to go, supplementing with creatine and protein shakes, ready to get toned again.


Oh wow, go for it man. Experiences are what shape the brain, and they create new ways of being/doing. So definitely go for it.



I haven't tried this but I haven't focused on women. I lost my interest in the girl that was underage for me and we barely said hi to each other the other day. I think she didn't even say hi, or maybe we just said hey for a split second.


Well, I had a date that wanted to be turned into a three-way date which was fucking retarded, but my date with that girl, well, I had no feelings for her at all so the date was useless.

I don't get much feelings anymore for some reason. I don't know if the Spirit is trying to get me to focus on other things.



>Damn, that was expensive. That's why I always settled for cheap booze if the purpose was to get drunk.

That was for my cell phone not alcohol. I only spent like 100 on alcohol

>I encourage you getting a Sansa Clip.

iPhone isn't great but it will do the job since I have it laying around. I also have a zune laying around, but the OS is primitive compared to iOS. And the screen is smaller.


Hearing against the thot that went full #MeToo got really complicated. I'm done with the hearing, no longer participating in it. However, there was collateral damage, they're talking to four other people beside me, one including the thot, and two friends. One friend has a minor role and won't mind it. The other's a fucking woman that got me pissed off for involving her but they needed evidence or else my statements would be floating in air. She already got pissed off that she needs to go to a hearing, but she said she was sorry for getting pissed and that she does it cause she likes me as a friend.

I don't give two fucks about her, however. I'm using her as a means for my own ends, and I don't mind ending up friendless for my own causes since I'm somewhat of a misogynist unless it comes to Mormon women. I've always been an individual man and never really liked having friends because I don't like getting out of the house unless it's for ecclesiastical activities.

Got pissed off with the girl over the phone and needed to listen to her five minute WhatsApp voice recordings. I skipped over some, but I made it clear that she was going to go to the hearing.


I seriously hate like 95% of women and I woke up irritable.



Forgot a medication so it makes sense. The anger scared her and she's complying with my wishes.


File: cc3f6883e1b6e6d⋯.jpg (2.17 MB, 3264x2448, 4:3, 20181211_153937.jpg)


I met a general authority who encourages frequent exercise and actually told us that he will sometimes see the apostles in the gym at church headquarters. Its Elder Jörg Klebingat of the seventy. Hes great and sadly only has one general conference talk. I wish he had more.


I may have made a mistake. I e-mailed the girl at work, gave her my personal #, and told her to get in contact so we can talk about some things. I should probably avoid this girl, but my co-workers kinda talked me into it. She is really cute, but worth the trouble of trying to fix her cultural marxism infected mind? Probably not. Maybe we can be friends though. Maybe it will make things interesting, or maybe it will make things worse for me. I'm already around a bunch of terrible influences. Supposedly this girl doesn't drink or do drugs though, so she has that going for her. I suppose I should remember the scripture

>30 But their scribes and Pharisees murmured against his disciples, saying, Why do ye eat and drink with publicans and sinners?

>31 And Jesus answering said unto them, They that are whole need not a physician; but they that are sick.

>32 I came not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.


should I date a girl in a wheel chair?

she is cute and fit otherwise.

I don't think it would go anywhere though. I want to be physical and intimate after marriage and I think you would need working legs to do that.


What are your intentions?

You know what they are. Just be honest to yourself.



>should I date a girl in a wheel chair?

absolutely not



Use a free app like talkatone and give out that number. Never give any personal information ever to a female. Always have an email for spam. :^)

Don't forget your meditation

postmodern egalitarian relativism



File: 8cf248624d6e258⋯.jpg (873.63 KB, 1827x2699, 1827:2699, 8cf248624d6e2585f80bb244c4….jpg)


>What are your intentions?

>You know what they are. Just be honest to yourself.

My intentions are to talk to this cute girl and if things go well we will gas the kikes and start the race war together.



So far the entirety of our interactions through texting have been all business. It's good though. She is responsible for a company wide standard, and she now knows she has an ally in our building at the implementation level of the standard. Until now the standard has not been implemented as well as it should be, and she made that known to me in our earlier interactions in person. I've been ruthlessly imposing the standard onto these people by force. They resist it at every step, but I've been winning the battles slowly. They stop resisting as they see that their resistance is futile. Every day they come back and I've reverted things back to the standard, and they eventually give up.



Hmm, I would've said that you could've given her number straight up but this probably worked out. Friends is always a good idea, then escalating, cause you can see if she's a good catch. I usually get bored of women fast when we're friends and the attraction is lost.


I don't see much of a problem with this.


Ask her out casually somewhere, for coffee maybe? (rip Word of Wisdom, in other news, I stopped vaping but I still drink coffee. I don't give a shit anymore and Heavenly Father probably doesn't give two fucks about people drinking tea or coffee, even if I'm rationalizing it)



>Ask her out casually somewhere

I've been thinking I'll ask her when she takes lunch at work, and see if we can meet up at the cafeteria to have lunch together. She works 1st shift so I'd have to get to work pretty early but I think it's a good idea. It's about the safest date we could possibly have. The cafeteria at work makes some really good food too. They contract it out to a professional catering company.



Might be a good idea indeed. I was thinking of somewhere more secluded and not in a work environment, but since I'm not a person that's at work, what I can think about only is eating together at college.

That would kinda work I suppose? It's good for rapport, then eventually asking her out would help



>I was thinking of somewhere more secluded and not in a work environment

My thought is that if I make it easy enough, then the likelihood of rejection is very small. Then from there once she knows the kind of guy I am, she will be more willing to hang out outside of work.



That's actually brilliant. Never thought about it. A good way to also make her laugh and make small talk.


Off topic (or on topic)?

We apparently have a Heavenly Mother, according to early Mormon fathers and theologists. She's related to Asherah, Yahweh's wife, as well as Sophia or Wisdom from Proverbs.

Nothing to do with Mary, though.



The less pressure the date is the more likely it is to happen. That's why double dates are always a good way to get a first date, but since this is a girl I know at work the next best thing is getting something at work together. We will both be there anyway, and there is no real pressure on her.


>We apparently have a Heavenly Mother

I've heard about this but wish people wouldn't put much emphasis on it. It doesn't matter much in the grand scheme of things given that we don't pray to or worship her. All it really accomplishes is muddying things up for us. Anti-Mormons use it as a way to call us pagans



Seems that workplaces have their certain advantages. It's a bit similar in college in free periods with girls you barely know but are getting or trying to get to know.

>I've heard about this but wish people wouldn't put much emphasis on it.

As far as I know, not many LDS know about this at all, it's a sort of doctrine or theology that's pushed aside, but it's logical given the premortal and postmortal lives and what's said in the Pearl of Great Price as well as Smith's and Pratt's interpretation of Mormon theology.



Funny thing is, anyone that believes in the Trinity as three in one but not three in one is more pagan than us. We go by Biblical standards. Restorationism is the best thing that could happen to Christianity.

Not gonna lie, I appreciate and consider Islamic theology wonderful. They sing their Scripture, they base their entire way of life around it, they don't believe in free will (being honest I don't believe in free will) and have an all-pervading Allah that's apparently our same God, Yahweh. I would, however, never join a religion that never got out of its violent phase, inherently deathly, and spreading like powerful leukemia. Interdenominationally they kill each other due to misinterpreting Scripture. Sectarians kill the peaceful ones, and the peaceful ones decapitate us Christians. It's a sad religion, as aesthetic as Arabic can be.

Never met one in my life though, some look like Mexicans.

If you consider it quite well, we basically base ourselves in the most correct Bible interpretation possible: the simplest and most obvious one. No passages prove a "Trinity", just the Godhead, Jesus was made in Heavenly Father's image, therefore, Heavenly Father has a body just like Christ and like us. He's also a Heavenly Father that knows and respects our free will, and weeps and gets sad when we disappoint him. He's like us. That's what I like about our Church. Biblically accurate.


I have such a strong feeling I have to do something that seems crazy to me after what happened last time. I have a strong feeling I have to ask this girl if she wants to visit this older couple with me. The older couple are friends of ours, and they are going on a retirement mission soon. They are awaiting their mission call, and I got back in contact with them through her.

The only problem is that last time I asked this girl out I got rejected. I'm pretty sure you all know that story now and how catastrophic a rejection it was. This seems like such an innocent request, and it seems like something that should be so easy for us to do together since she visits them often anyway. Their house is right between our houses, so we could meet up there. Absolutely no pressure on her. Would she strike me down for this request? If so, I suppose I know my answer about whether it's worth trying with her.

I'm pretty vulnerable right now already, so this seems like such a bad idea. I don't need to be shaken anymore.


>As far as I know, not many LDS know about this at all

I've heard some people add it to their testimony, but they were older members of the ward. The younger ones were my age, and left the ward. It has been a while.



This post is exactly what I mean by what I said in this post >>3294

I need to purge this weakness from myself and do what needs to be done.



Go for it, but if it doesn't work out, quit there. I usually try about 2 times (three tops) for something to work out. If it doesn't, well, then I move on. But I keep trying if the feeling is still chasing me.



I did it. Haven't heard back so far.



Just joined an "anti-censorship" Christian Discord and I'm about to get kicked out for the sole fact of being a Mormon. These are Catholics, Orthodox and a Protestant minority. No shit, lol. MUH MARY.

>Believing in the fucking Trinity when not even Luther believed in it.



Best joke ever:

>Catholics interpreting the Bible




Other Christians have been well brainwashed to oppose us by their pastors who would lose their cushy life if we drew away their members. These guys drive fancy cars, have huge houses, and collect plenty of cash from these people so of course they have to paint us as the worst of the worst. Our church runs on unpaid volunteer work and uses the money raised from tithing for charity and the furthering of the work through building temples, churches, funding activities/institute and sending missionaries around the world. It says a lot about our church when our bishops have to have a career outside of being a bishop rather than being a career clergyman.


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Something I picked up from a testimony the other day that's quite important is to not fear anything or anyone but the Lord and what that implies. Literally nothing else. A small but powerful insight.

I'm doing the #LightTheWorld thing and giving a couple of stuff when I don't usually buy gifts.



>not fear anything or anyone but the Lord and what that implies

It's taken some time for me but I'm getting better at this one.

>I'm doing the #LightTheWorld thing and giving a couple of stuff when I don't usually buy gifts.



I went out for a cig since I needed nicotine. The cigarette tasted like shit. I just had lots of cravings and caved in, when I usually just vape pure nicotine instead of tobacco and its million toxins. The worst part is that I want more and that now I feel the sin of having smoked.

Such are things. At least quitting nicotine for a week helped me gain some weight, like three pounds, when I need to gain eight more pounds.

I feel awful



I guess I can do intermittent nicotine till I reach my target weight and fully stop by then.


Well, it seems that three hour church is officially over. We're going to have only one hour of Church this Sunday in the Sacramental Hall and no remaining hours, and I assume the Church won't be open during the 30th.

Get your 'Come, Follow Me' manuals ready, kids.


Well, I get a week off of work and I didn't give into my urges to buy alcohol. I still want to though.


>Well, it seems that three hour church is officially over

I still don't feel any better about this change. I guess we will see what happens.

>We're going to have only one hour of Church this Sunday in the Sacramental Hall




>Well, I get a week off of work and I didn't give into my urges to buy alcohol. I still want to though.

Very good I'm proud of you, it's not needed because it will make everything worse. You don't have to take my word for it but I hope you do. :^)



I'm gonna get myself lost in the world of Android customization instead. If I can keep my mind occupied with some sort of hobby during this week it will be easier to stay on the right path. I also need to schedule some appointments. My problem is I have nothing but alone time, and if I don't find something to fill it with I'll focus on my problems. I've been messing with customizing my phone since yesterday at work, and I've done some pretty cool stuff. I had nothing but free time at work and I was having a terrible day so I decided to occupy myself with something. The next app I'm gonna learn will unlock unlimited possibilities. It's like when I was first learning to customize my Linux OS, I could spend days on this.



Good. I even had the strange urges to get high, last week. With DXM. It went away, and those cravings are extremely rare. Once a year kind of rare.


Idle hands are the devil's workshop. I'm also currently messing with Android. I rooted my phone and I'm doing everything with it, I'm also playing with my Chromebook a little. Mostly using an app to crunch calculations for cancer cure development.

Protip: Download "L Speed" and play around with it. Also, Greenify with root almost makes it as if your phone was turned off when it's turned on and idle.



>I still don't feel any better about this change. I guess we will see what happens.

Many people I know don't feel good about it either.



>I rooted my phone and I'm doing everything with it

I haven't bothered to root yet, but I may eventually. I've been messing with nova launcher since last night and I'm just starting with klwp. Klwp is ridiculous, the possibilities for customization are endless.

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I'll check that one out. Not gonna lie, Android is really fun



KLWP is overwhelming so far. It's gonna take some serious tutorials to get into this. I'll probably download some already made themes, and try tweaking things I dislike about them before I make my own.


File: 44a9198027e2ba6⋯.gif (4.12 MB, 720x1280, 9:16, android.gif)

I got a klwp theme that someone posted working on my device. I ended up changing the icons in the dock to match the call/text icons and better suit the theme after I took the video, but I don't think I'll be keeping this long term. I'll use it until I find something better. Still pretty cool though.

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Winter Thaw

A humble shoemaker in late 19th-century Russia has lived a life characterized by grief. That is, until kindhearted missionaries help him find the courage to look outside himself and trust in the goodness of God.


That's it an interesting distraction, learn something new, you will be fine hex. I've been perfecting my meditation for 12 years now and it always helps for being alone. It works the same way to distract the monkey and give it something to play with. I'm working on updating my computer, I have a hard drive slide, so monday I'll get two 500 gig ssd's, one for the new pureos, and the other for the newest linux mint. I want to switch to pureos it's a Debian for privacy. And soon the new librem 5 phone comes out in april I think, can't wait for the new linux phone. Merry xmas and happy holidays to you. :^)



>I'm working on updating my computer, I have a hard drive slide, so monday I'll get two 500 gig ssd's, one for the new pureos, and the other for the newest linux mint

I haven't tried pureos, but Mint is always a good choice. I'm running Gentoo now, and I wouldn't change it for anything else at this point.

>And soon the new librem 5 phone comes out in april I think

Those are interesting, I hope they turn out well. I'm stuck with android for quite a while since I just bought a new phone but hopefully by the time I need to switch this will be a viable option.

>Merry xmas and happy holidays to you. :^)

Merry Christmas, anon.



I'm a battery jew. I have an Asus ZenFone 3 Zoom however I still hoard battery despite it being the phone with the longest lasting battery in the market. Has the same battery as my Chromebook, 5,000 mAh, and I use a minimalistic launcher and no wallpaper, lol.


I meditate with music at times, it's very nice and time goes by very fast due to it.


Always stick with Android, for sure. Librem is Android based too, afaik. iOS is pure garbage.



>I'm a battery jew. I have an Asus ZenFone 3 Zoom however I still hoard battery despite it being the phone with the longest lasting battery in the market

With how fast the note 9 charges on top of the 4000 mAh battery I don't worry too much about battery life. I don't even think the simple animations are anymore draining than my old background as far as I can tell.

>Librem is Android based too, afaik

Librem is pure Linux running pureOS which is debian based



Yeah, our battery technically is never-ending, we can watch about 4 or 5 movies on it without any sort of issue and still have half the battery life. I might start to tweak a bit of stuff since I have the time, but I'd rather mess with the root stuff.

Rooting voids the warranty, however.



>Yeah, our battery technically is never-ending, we can watch about 4 or 5 movies on it without any sort of issue and still have half the battery life

It's crazy how long these batteries last. At work I was on my phone for about 3 hours straight, while my co-workers were off and on. My battery was still well over half while they were having to charge their phones with external batteries multiple times. My phone estimates its battery life to be 1 day 20 hours without any sort of battery optimization. With some optimization it goes over 2 days, and with full optimization it claims it can last over 6 days. I don't use any battery optimization right now.



I use full battery optimization at root as well as in general just using general battery optimization. The iPhone plebs always have to charge their phones in the middle of classes or get external batteries too. iPhone batteries are pure garbage.


Reflecting on today because my friend asked me how church went, I realize even more that I need to resist the urge to drink and put my worthiness into question. Without me the ward doesn't run. I don't want to make myself seem important, because I'm not; but the state of the men of this ward is pathetic. There are some bright spots, but mostly I am not happy with how our men are doing right now.

It seems that we have a lot of guys that are "going through the motions". I hate that phrase because I do think that even if you are doing that, if you show up to church you are at least somewhat trying. But there are guys that should be doing so much better that just aren't. Every Sunday I prepare the sacrament. Alone. That's fine, I don't mind doing it. Every Sunday I look for people to bless and pass, and I try to include different guys because it shouldn't be the same people doing all the work every Sunday. What I get is a bunch of guys that reject my offer to bless or pass. This is completely unacceptable unless you have a cold or are facing worthiness issues. The latter being unacceptable in itself. So unless you are sick you should be doing what it takes to be able to use your priesthood power.

I'm recommending to our elders quorum president that I be allowed to talk to the quorum about the responsibilities of priesthood holders. We need another one of my moments of fire and fury. They must be exhorted to do better, challenged to ponder what is holding them back from using their priesthood to serve the ward, and invited to come to me and ask to bless or pass once they have realized how sad a display it is for a worthy priesthood holder to turn down the opportunity to serve. If a man in need of help approached Christ and asked him for help, would Christ have said "not this week, thanks though"?

Today it was so bad that I almost had one of the older adults in the ward that is only there to help out in some of the administrative functions of the ward help pass the sacrament. This is a ward where guys outnumber girls, and this is the state we have fallen to. Last week I had a councilor in the bishopric tell me that if it comes down to it I have the bishopric to ask to help pass. That is not good, that is not good at all. We have plenty of worthy men, it shouldn't even be brought up as an option. These older adults that are only here to help us in administrative functions are offering to help us with something we should be taking full charge of. Absolutely pathetic. Unacceptable.

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I wish I could forget even just temporarily. Don't worry though, I won't. I promise I'll endure this, and I won't give in to the temptation. I don't know why Christmas is so hard for me, but this holiday is absolute havoc on my mind. I'm so tired of being alone.

>inb4 but you aren't ever alone

That doesn't help and it never will.

>ELOHIM: Jehovah, is it good for man to be alone?

>JEHOVAH: It is not good for man to be alone, Elohim

>ELOHIM: We will cause a deep sleep to come upon this man whom we have formed, and we will take from his side a rib, from which we will form a woman to be a companion and helpmeet for him.



I'll respond to your former post tomorrow, but I felt just the same today. I drank actually, two beers. I never drink, I just don't like the day much even if it's a day to rejoice. I remember the Lord, but I'm all alone.

Genesis 2:18,23


Merry Christmas!


>hitler did nothing wrong

>the holocaust never happened

pick 1




Initial Plasma Mobile enablement on Librem 5 i.MX 6 test boards


It's coming along nicely it seems soon we will have a working GNOME based phone shell and Plasma Mobile on our desktop.


>As many of you know, the Librem 5 phone will work with two options for your desktop environment, a GNOME based phone shell and Plasma Mobile. Working closely with the KDE community, we were able to install, run, and even see mobile network provider service on Plasma Mobile! The purpose of this article is to show the progress that has been made with Plasma Mobile on the current Librem 5 development board. Here, the setup steps and overcome challenges are highlighted.

This is the OS they are putting on a phone:


It is a phone with a full Linux OS for a desktop computer.


This is the best laptop to own because you can open it up and upgrade and work on it yourself.

That means more ram than you thought possible and the newest NVMe SSDs can be installed yourself; It's a portable super powered workstation/desktop, every year they get better.







Merry Christmas


what a waste


>It's coming along nicely it seems soon we will have a working GNOME based phone shell and Plasma Mobile on our desktop.

That's great news.


Merry Christmas to everyone!


In the case of the men in my ward, I can see who takes leadership and who does not. There's more of us that take leadership than those who don't. I know about two or three particular people that do take it seriously, and about two that don't. A recently baptized member that rarely comes.

I've been sitting at the very front of the Sacramental Hall every Sunday, paying attention to the testimonies, and I will sanctify the Lord's Supper soon, as well as give baptisms to dead.

The bishop has deemed me worthy for the Melchizedek Priesthood this February, since it's a Stake Conference apparently, but I need to show leadership if the rest of the people don't.

As Latter-day Saints we need to stand up for our beliefs and take them seriously, despite our transgressions, we can't let our community fall apart and we need more leaders. I wouldn't mind at all being a leader at my community if other people aren't up to it, and I will take charge of my ward if apathy prevails.


The Holocaust did happen, but the numbers weren't as high as people say they are. Only thousands died, maybe tens of thousands, but not even a million. It's impossible. He did nothing wrong in the extermination of whatever Jews were possible to kill.


I've heard about Librem, its OS and the laptops and phones. However, I only own 250 dollars and I'm too poor to make a purchase. Out of these dollars I plan to make some donations, too, since I don't require money lately. I might save up though, but I'd require a lot of cash and I don't have a job or time for a job, since I'm a college student and my parents prefer to me to focus on school since my depression can strike at any time and fuck my shit up in both areas.


Like I said, I drank too. A depression is falling over me for no particular reason. My depression is organic, and it's most likely bipolar II with treatment resistant depression than actual MDD. I'm trying to endure this depression, not sure how I'll make it but I'll just read Scripture today and see how I can make the Church stronger.


I drank yesterday, read the Book of Mormon afterwards, 3rd Nephi. I caved in in public despite people knowing I'm a Mormon, yet, I can't control this depression.



>In the case of the men in my ward, I can see who takes leadership and who does not. There's more of us that take leadership than those who don't

For me it's kinda surreal. I've been in this ward 2 years now, and I've seen every bit of leadership leave our ward. Me and our elders quorum president are the only leadership fixtures that still remain. Some of the voids have filled, but the lack of leadership is clearly evident when you reflect on how our Sundays go. It's literally me, the elders quorum president, the relief society president, and the Sunday school president that make this ward. It's good that we have such great people in these positions but you would hope that these presidencies would have more to offer than just their top members.

Our elders quorum presidency is a shell of its former self right now. We lost our councilor a month ago, we are losing our secretary this month, and the councilor we were going to call turned us down. I'm going to recommend to our president that we do not call another councilor. If it's up to me we will call another secretary, and if he can handle doing the work of a secretary I'll recommend we bump him to councilor and get another secretary. This is how I was developed, and this seems like the only way to ensure we get someone deserving of the position in this current state of things.

One of the older adults of the ward recommends we challenge someone to step up, but I see this as a disaster waiting to happen. If I can't even get people to step up to help with the sacrament none of them are worthy of the calling. They cannot even magnify their priesthood ability in the most basic way to serve our ward, what makes anyone think they will magnify it to take on a leadership position in the priesthood quorum? To be a leader you must show that you can lead, and no one is showing that they are willing to lead the charge in the most important part of church. It's such a simple thing too.


If I had access to it I would have fallen to temptation days ago. If the site I ordered wine from the first time didn't make it so hard to order from them I would have failed. They cancel 99% of my orders, which is good. I've only gotten 1 order to go through and that was the one we all know about. I tried again recently, and they cancelled my order. If not for that I'd have alcohol right now and I'd be in the same position I was in last month. So the reality is: I'm not enduring it because I'm that strong, I'm enduring it because I wasn't allowed to fail. I could go to the store and get it, but I won't. I'll make it through this.



Fuck depression tbh. I'm getting a Blessing soon for this. Hope you do better and I'm glad you're making it.



>I'm getting a Blessing soon for this

It does help. I've gotten a couple for this, but I probably need another one soon because things are building up again. I should have probably asked for 1 last Sunday, letting it go to this point was a mistake.


Honestly considering going back to bed right now tbh. I can't take anymore of this day. All anyone wants to do is brag about the stuff they got or how great a time they are having. I don't want to hear anymore.


A certain cancer poster that I ban whenever I get a chance on /b/ posted a verse from the Book of Mormon. I don't understand his motive for doing what he does, and the verse doesn't really say much when taken out of its context in the story. But have I caused him to actually begin reading the Book of Mormon?


Interesting…on fast Sunday a few weeks ago I mentioned that I sat with a girl to watch the streamed broadcast and we sang hymns together. She just texted me to wish me a merry Christmas. Was seriously not expecting that. I don't even have her # in my phone.



Have I finally made so much of an impact on a girl that she remembers me enough to look me up and send me a text?



I've gotten texts from so many people today, and mostly I've felt cold. That one changed everything and made my day. Someone that I didn't expect has reached out to me in a way that I never expected. She isn't the prettiest girl in the ward, but she's a really nice girl. Maybe she's the one I need to give more attention to.





Now here is the really interesting part of all of this: I had a dream this girl would contact me just a couple nights ago. It wasn't super obvious what the dream was about at the time, just that I'd receive a message from someone. The symbolism in the dream led me to believe it was her, but it was just a guess. I never imagined it would actually happen.



So you took her out to dinner and let her do most of the talking, and everything went perfect. Then you took her home and walked her to the door. And she gave you a big hug and a polite kiss, said thank you and goodnight, we should do something again soon. :^)



Sometimes even bad publicity is still publicity. Maybe he took it out from LDS.org, "notable verses", but still….it's a start. I knew that as Moroni I got at least, at least one person interested in the Church. Or maybe I'm being arrogant.


I remember this girl. That was very nice of her. See what she has to offer, she already did a nice selfless offer to you.


Holy Ghost subtly communicating, maybe?


Off-topic: I'm in full blown hypomania, so I'm doing a thorough study of the Bible and I'm almost done with the Book of Mormon after a months long pause. Almost done with 3rd Nephi. I skipped Helaman but I will read it afterwards.

Gospel Library is great and I'm highlighting everything and doing lots of reading.


How's everyone?

t. Moroni (or well the anon poster that posts here every time including just like 8 hours ago)



>Maybe he took it out from LDS.org, "notable verses"

This verse was pretty obscure, and it was found in 1st Nephi so I wonder if he has been browsing the book.

>See what she has to offer, she already did a nice selfless offer to you.

I'll give it a shot.

>Holy Ghost subtly communicating, maybe?

Sure seems that way.


>Almost done with 3rd Nephi

Nice, I need to get back to studying again. The tendonitis in my elbow has flared up again, so I'll be doing less lifting which will leave me with 2-3x more time in the morning. If I can use that time for scriptures, and a little bit of cardio I think that will be a good way to fill that time. So instead of an hour lifting, 20-30 minutes of cardio and some scripture study. I'm gonna burn off my muscle, but I guess that's what it's going to come to until that elbow heals well enough. I'll take a couple weeks off and see if I can get back into light lifting



Sorry I've kinda been away from the board as much as I have today. I've been trying to get appointments squared away. Finding a place to get my eyes checked so I can get new glasses/contacts has been kind of a pain. The place I wanted to go doesn't accept my insurance for eye exams which is retarded. I'll be going to Walmart instead just because it's the easiest way to guarantee I can get an appointment in while I'm on vacation. I got 1 scheduled for tomorrow. Next I gotta call my dentist and get that setup for whenever I possibly can since it's been years.

That girl I minister to asked me to go to the temple with her and some other guys on Saturday to do baptisms because she has a bunch of male names she needs done. It will be good to go to the temple again, I just wish it were for endowments tbh.



What a shitshow walmart is. The nog that setup my appointment did it wrong and only scheduled me for an eye exam, so I had to wait for insurance to approve doing a contacts fitting which costs extra. The asian lady that did the exam was cool though. The nog went in to her and said that "I changed my mind and wanted to do contacts after the fact". I went back into the doctors office and she was like you wanted contacts all along and she schedule you wrong. Apparently it's a common occurrence with the dumb negress. She was cool about it though, and we got everything squared away. I'm wearing contacts for the first time, and it's amazing. This will do a lot for my confidence. Not having frames blocking part of my face just feels so much more right.


This feels so weird. I keep feeling like I need to put my glasses on.


Just performed battery replacement surgery on that old iPhone I'm using as an MP3 player. Went to go work out with 30% battery left, and it died when I turned my music on. I've had an iPhone battery kit laying around that my friend gave me when he upgraded because he didn't end up using it. Should have been easier than it was, getting the battery connector to click into place was a pain. Other than that, pretty smooth process. Glad I hopefully don't have to do that again any time soon.



The new Linux phone will have replaceable batteries, everything that purism makes is top quality and you can fix it/upgrade it yourself. This is the future for guys like us, fuck google and niggers like that, take care buddy…


Today will be my first day of church wearing contacts instead of glasses. It may not seem like a huge change, but I feel quite a bit more confident about my looks when I don't have frames blocking parts of my face. Picked up some nice new ties too, and I think these ones may be the best ones I own. Gonna wear the best one I got today. Hoping for a good day today.


It sure will be nice to have some good competition in the cell phone market place.


Not very many highlights today. The best things I can say that happened is that my new tie got tons of compliments, reaction to me not wearing glasses was positive, and the Lord provided a way for me to do something that I've been wanting to do. There's a poster that has been hanging in my room for a while, I've been wanting to get rid of it because it's a remnant of my past. Only thing is I didn't have anything to replace it with.

I went to our clerks office this morning, and my friend was asking one of the older adults what he should do with a picture that has been laying around. Basically he wanted to get rid of it, but didn't want to throw it away since it was a nice framed picture of our local temple. I decided I would take it home and replace the poster with it. I think the message to me is pretty clear. I need to look towards the temple more often. I had an opportunity to go on Saturday, I skipped it. I made up a lie to get out of it, something I've had to repent for. It isn't that I didn't want to go, but there were a lot of reasons I avoided it. Too early, this girl stood me up for breakfast, she asked me to try to setup a carpool and all the guys that were supposed to go didn't respond, and I woke up feeling pretty down about things. So I skipped it to sleep in.

I'd like to go again, but not with her.


>open Mutual

>qt 29 year old Mormon grill near me

>how is she not married?

>view profile

<Mormon feminist/lgbtbbq ally

oh that's how.


So I'm being pushed to go to this dance tonight. I really don't think it's a good idea for me to do it in my current state. I may force myself to do it anyway, but I'm pretty sure if I do that I'm going to end up worse off than before I went. There are a lot of things on my mind right now ranging from anger and depression at the state of my life right now, to disgust with how the men in my ward are approaching church. My elders quorum president doesn't like the idea of me going off on the group again, so he's going to have the bishop do it instead. The bishop is a good guy but his leadership style is too laid back and weak.

I'm so tired of the weakness of this church right now. We need harsh admonitions. Fire and brimstone. Lay it down so hard that these people repent of their wickedness on the spot in fear of their salvation being in jeopardy. These men need to straighten the fuck up and be men, and these women need to be put back in their places. It's unfortunate that there will never be leaders like the days of old because people are too damn weak to handle it.

I know I'm weak myself, but I would love to have that point hammered into me. It seems I'm the only one willing to push myself in that way though. Everyone else would rather tell me that I have so much potential and that I'm doing so well. It's a load of shit. I deserve no praise until I accomplish the thing that I am supposed to accomplish. That is victory, nothing less. There are 2 outcomes to this style of leadership: the strong rise up knowing their faults and how to attack them, the weak crumble into the dust they were created from. And this is the only way to advance. Purge the weak, stop rewarding their weakness.



The more I think about it the more I know I have to go. Even if I end up overcome by own weakness because of it. The only way to become stronger is to embrace the failures that are to come, and turn them into reasons to push to be better. I'm going.



Dances are everything wrong with the church right now. I don't know why I keep attempting to go to them. It's one step away from a degenerate club, the only difference is the drugs and alcohol aren't done openly if they are done. I don't think this should be encouraged.

>inb4 no fun allowed

tbh if fun is appropriating nigger culture, I want no part of fun.


Sorry I failed again. Come to my /b/ sticky though if you are online tbh >>>/b/8559464



>tbh if fun is appropriating nigger culture, I want no part of fun.

This is modern culture now, a hybrid of retards in loincloths beating on hollow logs and thinking it's better. It isn't better they have been told since they were born to fit in and compromise. The Niggers should be forced to fit into our culture or leave, not the other way around. They do it on purpose to protest, anything they can do to upset white society. Good white people don't want to be a nigger and make rap songs unless they are brain dead. Everyone knows why things are upside down. Niggers don't want to fit in to our way of life or they would have by now. But they do want to disrupt it that's very plain. One of the funniest things in the news recently was the Flint Michigan water problem, I thought it was funny as hell.


Stop it, you can't fail at something you are n't compatible with. I think you are doing very well compared to most young people your age. You aren't a problem child and your brain is functioning perfectly. :^)


What the fuck is going on here?



> One of the funniest things in the news recently was the Flint Michigan water problem, I thought it was funny as hell.


>I think you are doing very well compared to most young people your age. You aren't a problem child and your brain is functioning perfectly. :^)

Thanks, anon. I just feel like I'm failing to live up to the standards of the church when I go out and buy alcohol



>Thanks, anon. I just feel like I'm failing to live up to the standards of the church when I go out and buy alcohol

I went to Milwaukee to find work it was 1972 I was 18 years old. There was a Tavern on every corner and I was old enough, a glass of beer was 10 cents, a shot of booze 25 cents. Milwaukee was a beer town then and it was just a part of life. Everyone drank and lived their lives in a drunken state it was considered normal and the local Tavern was the meeting place to socialize. They walked, drove and did everything drunk because it was legal then. Until People got tired of being run over by drunks. I did my share of drinking, and I especially liked it because it worked everytime or so I thought, for what ailed me. From 1972 - 2007 I drank enough for 10 people I think. I had raised a family and kept a marriage together for 28 years and then it was time to change my life. I found a job in Willow Springs Missouri doing maintenance on 12 buildings on 80 acres at a Yoga Meditation retreat center. Eventually I became an assistant to the Rector and handled the daily operations. I lived with Monks for two years, and I just lost the urge and craving for Alcohol and quit. I had my time with alcohol, it's been 12 years now and I've never drank since, it fell away like it was never there. Today I'm retired for 1 year, a meditation Monk since that time. I left out the details to make this brief. After the two years I went back to civilization and drove professionally until I retired, I have every endorsement except hazardous materials and have done everything you can do with a truck, even worked the oil fields in Montana hauling tanker. My point; you will adapt when something significant comes along and grabs your head. Bad habits come and go, your drinking isn't as bad as some, it's a phase in your life. I was born a Mormon but it never took with me, Religion is a lifestyle. After I learned Meditation I began to see through it all, and finally could surrender. I hope this helps you to find peace.



Thanks for sharing that, anon. It does help. I know that eventually I do want to live this life style, it's just difficult when I'm struggling to accomplish my goals. Drinking obviously doesn't help that, but it does get rid of the pain for a little while. I usually go at least a month between drinking when I do it, so I'm definitely not an alcoholic so at least there's that. Unfortunately, my current supply is going to last a few weeks.



Alcohol puts the front of the brain to sleep and that's why it's so effective. It temporarily cuts off the unbearable anxiety from the worry of the frontal cortex. The only effective way I found over the years to deal with it is to train it not to worry. Meditation is emotional training; you train the self to step back and become a witness of the emotional response that our body has. The emotions are deep within the body and impossible to control without this training, over time you grow an off/on switch. The peace is found in the profound silence inside the self, this is the only place that it can be touched, what has been called God. There are no words to describe this feeling because it is beyond language, it transcends all attempts to describe it. And so this is the reason for fantastical stories, and all spiritual - religious writing was and is created from drug use of some sort. Anthropology has well documented this back to when history began. The lifestyle in the church is better than the degenerate outside world filled with demons. But it will never be perfect, the group of like minded people are trying to do better but suffer from their own weaknesses. Those that can do more do so by leading the weaker with examples of love and affection, needed so desperately by those struggling and suffering below. Read some of the Bios of greatest and most influential leaders on this planet, and they all suffered deeply but managed to love the people closest to them. I wasn't an alcoholic and neither are you, but we suffer because we deeply care about the fate of the world and some of it's people. Humans have been self medicating since the beginning of time. Meditation is usually only done after all else fails. :^)



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As if I didn't already have enough problems, I get hit by a chink driving to work. Why can't these slant eyed fucks drive?



>Meditation is usually only done after all else fails.

100% true. If you consider prayer a form of meditation then I hit my last resort when I converted to this religion. Everything else failed, and some missionaries showed up to lead me to pray. Things have gotten better, but now I have another wall to break through.



>100% true. If you consider prayer a form of meditation.

Prayer is a highly focused form like a lazer, prayer is done after a lot of thought, and usually in the middle great suffering you will focus on a pinpoint of grief; surrendering to the supreme Being, asking begging for relief from your suffering. When this happens there is a temporary break between your higher self and the stubborn ego, you turn over the problem to a higher power. This releases the stress and anxiety (locked energy) and allows an answer to surface. Classic Meditation is a way to train the body to relax and then you can search for your triggers. Most of the time you don't realize that this is happening, until you sit still and whatever is bothering you comes floating by; and it will continue to float by until it is resolved. I used to fly fish when I was younger before I learned meditation, and it became my meditation because everything that bothered me drained out when I was in the river. Being in Nature renewed my energy and anything negative was washed away. Gardening will do it too if you pick weeds for an hour all of your negative energy will be gone. You will eventually find your trigger for alcohol and heal yourself when it's time, take care. :^)

No attachments no conflict.



>You will eventually find your trigger for alcohol and heal yourself when it's time

I know exactly what it is. It's the fear that I'll always be alone. That I'll never find/attain the girl I'm looking for. That's why even when I have my greatest of moments of accomplishment I end up wanting to drink: even though I accomplished something great, it wasn't enough. It's progress but progress means nothing unless that progress pays off in the end. Progress may put me closer, but when the distance is unknown that feeling of being closer doesn't mean much especially when my next action isn't clear.

I've met every girl in my ward, but there is only one that I'm actually interested in. She has rejected me one time already, so I question whether it's worth continuing with her. The only other thing I can really do is start asking girls out without caring what happens. Just knowing that maybe if I try with enough girls, one of them will be worth my time.


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What are some good date ideas?

That is what I struggle with. I just have no idea what to do together.

My list of first date ideas so far:

>go to a swap meet

>christmas light park

>movie theater

Any suggestions?



Breakfast, lunch, dinner, ice cream are all good options for a semi short date that can turn into a long date depending on how things are going. Hikes are a good option. My friend likes sporting events, but I think that's better to wait for a second or third date. For the first date try to find something where you aren't committed to spending hours with them if it isn't going well. This is why, in my opinion, movies are one of the worst options for a first date. You sit next to them for hours not talking. It's better to get to know the person before doing something like that. I think it's also good to do things that are cheap or even free because it shouldn't really matter how much money is spent as long as you are enjoying yourself with the person. That's the thing with dates too, it doesn't really matter what you do as long as you have fun doing it.



It also depends on what time of the year it is too. Like for example: during the summer just go to a park, or near Halloween you can go to things like corn mazes and haunted houses



>I've met every girl in my ward, but there is only one that I'm actually interested in. She has rejected me one time already, so I question whether it's worth continuing with her.

Do you know why she said no?

I would start there, first do a background search, there is a lot available through public information. You can get everything with a visit to the local courthouse. Talk with the upper echelon and older women at the church and gather as much information as you can. When you sift through it you can now make a decision, and you will know much more about your potential mate. :)


An after thought. Marriages were arranged years ago through a match maker, I'm sure that the church has something like this in place. During your search you will find this also.



>Do you know why she said no?

There are a few possible reasons. I think it's pretty likely it's just what she was going through at the time. She had an ER visit for something that could have killed her from what she has said in her testimony a while back. I don't know the specifics, but I haven't gotten to really talk to her about what was going on back then though. I asked someone that knows her really well about her, but he hasn't said anything yet. He said he would send me a message about everything soon, haven't heard from him so far. I texted her recently inviting her to go visit him and his wife with me but she never answered. They are an old retired couple and are leaving on a mission at some point, so I figured we could go and see them together. Apparently I'm not the only one that gets the silent treatment though, she's a bad texter from what I'm told.



My insurance denied liability. Lying chink bastard filed a claim trying to blame me for his incompetence but my insurance knew pretty quickly this dumb chink is the one at fault so they won't be paying him a cent. Now to collect my money from his insurance.



How bad is your car?



Just some scratches and a giant dent in 1 of my doors. It's drive-able. The thing is repairing it isn't really worth it. I'm gonna take it to get an estimate here pretty soon, but I'm thinking I'll just take the money and sell the car. I have a friend that is interested in it if I'm willing to sell it cheap. I've been saving up for a while, so I'm gonna look at getting something better than what I have.


I've been through a rough patch, dealing with depression and non-working medication. Having doubts about the Church recently, but I think I'll stay. All religions are very subjective though, very, very subjective. The Degrees of Glory, becoming our own Gods and creating our own planets, and Heavenly Mother are making me doubt, along with my depression.



I'm thinking again about the subjectivism of religion and sometimes I care, sometimes I don't. I just don't feel the Spirit or God very present in my life lately.



>The Degrees of Glory, becoming our own Gods and creating our own planets, and Heavenly Mother are making me doubt, along with my depression.

Why? These are the things that help me the most in realizing that there is no other religion that could be right.


I have peace in life because I don't blame god for everything. An imaginary story that becomes a soap opera, is the root of depression, it goes in an endless circle and has no answer. If you want to change your life change the story then you will be happy enough. Go out in nature and sit under some trees, listen to the birds sing, and see that they are not depressed, in fact they are to busy living to be unhappy. :^)



>they are to busy living to be unhappy.

This is more powerful than you think it is.

For some reason, today my faith grew stronger and so did my testimony. No particular reason, I just prayed the day before and studied the BoM and the Bible a bit. Sometimes enduring till the end is a bit of a battle, but when you side with Christ, you always win.



>This is more powerful than you think it is.

All there is, is life and no one owns it. When I wake up and my eyes open I decide to be happy in that moment. There is another day to do something good, to do what needs to be done, simply because its the right thing to do. And nothing else matters in that moment. In 2007 I was out in nature and there was nothing visible or audible that was man-made, in that moment I realised the difference between life and death. And that realization has been with me ever since. Everything made by man is a dead imitation, we make tools, but we can't create life, or make anything come alive. Life is the real gift but often we forget this because we are lost in the dream. The human dream of formulas, strategies and plans for living. There are none, all there is, is life and it just continues no matter what we do, it just happens, until the day we take our last breath, and then it is gone. If you can really see this in this moment you will never waste another day and you will always be happy enough. Give this to someone else, pass it on, really make their day. :^)


It's like I can't get a break lately. New wrist injury, same wrist that has been bothering me for a while. Lifting routine on hold until this heals. Not sure how I injured it, but it happened at work at some point. Probably when I was taking supplies off pallets to store in our supply closet. This one is pretty bad too, I don't know how long it's gonna set me back but I feel it when I'm not putting any weight on it which is the worst it has been.



>For some reason, today my faith grew stronger and so did my testimony. No particular reason, I just prayed the day before and studied the BoM and the Bible a bit.

That's good. I need to do the same, even my prayer routine is suffering lately. I have to do a lot better in spiritual things. I'm just kinda overloaded with bullshit right now. I've accomplished a lot of things I needed to do lately though. Hopefully things slow down a bit again, and I can re-focus again.


I've lifted all of my life, always worked hard, tired and sore, injuries are common because we push to hard, but I found something that works really good, it healed a Ganglion cyst on my wrist, it took about 4 months, but there is only surgery to help this. I applied it every day for a week, then when I remembered to do it.


For an injury like this, or even a deep wound I use DMSO, I like the small glass bottle of pure pharma grade for this because it absorbs immediately, pain goes away and the injury is healed, apply daily with your fingers rub it in, but you need to not re-injure it for a couple weeks.

For skin anything that looks like an infection with reddening. Take a glass bottle, empty 1 capsule of Ginkgo Biloba into bottle add a couple tablespoons of DMSO, swirl it around until well combined, apply this liberally, cap the extra for later. This will cure things that antibiotic cream won't help. There is a DMSO gel with aloe vera but it dosen't absorb as fast.

I have used it for about two years, DMSO can be used on any part of the body, I have even used it in my eyes without harm. It stings for about a minute and then goes away, the sting is delayed reaction, doesn't sting for the first minute or so. There are many research studies that prove it to be nontoxic and harmless. But I'm telling you in my own experience it is an amazing solvent that heals you like nothing else. It comes in plastic, I prefer glass, and don't use it with metal. For mixing or to apply a small amount use a wooden stick.

It goes right through the skin into the blood stream so don't use dyed cloth or anything toxic that you don't want in your blood, make sure the area is clean and dry first. Any questions I'll try to help answer them.

(Amazon has it in many forms).


I just stumbled down a rabbit hole that I never expected to find. My company is in serious violation of the law. I reported an issue to them, and they kinda danced around it and tried to get me to close the issue or lessen the severity of the risk. I kept doing research and found out they are in violation of the law in this state, and possibly committing fraud. I've been saying it since day one: they are gonna know my name in this company. I emailed a guy tonight laying into him before I found the fraud related stuff. Now I know what his reply is likely to be, and if I'm correct I'm going to slap him down harder than he has ever experienced in his life. He will regret fucking with me. This goes so far that I'm protected as a whistleblower by state law for reporting this stuff. This is absolutely insane. Everyone is gonna know my name very soon.


>For an injury like this, or even a deep wound I use DMSO

>I like the small glass bottle of pure pharma grade

Very interesting. My dad gave me a small vial of this months ago, and I just stashed it away not thinking much about it. I'll try it out. Thanks for the tip.



>Very interesting. My dad gave me a small vial of this months ago, and I just stashed it away not thinking much about it. I'll try it out.

Good :^)



How did that work out for you so far?

I found a book you should read because you want to get married and think some women can be trusted. It's a direct link to the pdf.

take care :^)


Religious girls

Churches are crawling with predatory females masquerading as born again lilies of the field, but ravenously seeking willing, naive males. Those who bite on the biblical “lord and master” routine being peddled by churchgoing predatory females, being more deluded than most, will find (after the camel gets its head in the tent) their scrotum stretchings twice as miserable.

The book is written in such a plainspoken style that it may serve as a great introduction for hopeless beta males who need to be eased into a new belief system without a shock to their system, especially since it’s much faster to read than The Manipulated Man. I recommend it as required reading for any man who is considering marriage in the West.

The Predatory Female


15 Important Quotes From The Predatory Female





MGTOW shit isn't welcome here.



What happened with your job so far?


I had a job many years ago, running an unsafe machine that chopped up recycled plastic. I had to call OSHA in to make the owners install a lockout on the electric so that someone couldn't turn the machine on when I had my hands in there changing the chopper blades. The OSHA guy told me that they were breaking the law and would be fined, but they could and probably would fire me for exercising my rights to have a safe job, and not loose my hands to do so. After he left the Owner escorted me out to the sidewalk and told me in front of witnesses that if he ever saw me again he would shoot me dead. OSHA collected their fine and I never saw either one again. I could not get another job in that town and had to move. I learned that day the only rule that matters in life; just don't make things worse than they already are. I should have left and got another job somewhere else. A year later I could have gone back and capped the SOB and did everyone a favor. This is the only way to help in the modern world, sniping the real problems, but don't dare show your face when you do it, or it's off to the Gulag for you.



They (((fixed))) the problem. It's not fixed



At least in this case if they were to retaliate against me in any way I would make so much money off the resulting lawsuit that they would have just been better off fixing their shit. This company can easily afford to fix this


Sorry I haven't been posting much, but there hasn't been much going on. I go to work, come home, and go to bed. I can't say there's much positive or negative going on for me right now. I'm mainly focused on getting a new job, and playing politics in the current job while I'm stuck in it. Slapping around managers while I'm protected by a union is pretty satisfying tbh


Gospel related: I hate 2 hour church. Absolutely terrible change. "Oh but hex, we will have informal study groups to take the place of the 3rd hour". Didn't I express doubt that this would happen? I was correct in my doubt. I haven't been to 1 "informal study group".



>there hasn't been much going on

Alright I've got something. A while back I mentioned that my old retired friend was going to talk to me about the girl I like since he knows her really well. He finally called me today. What he told me was that she just passed the GRE and doesn't know how long she will be around here anymore.

He also said that he asked her if she was interested in anyone. She said she isn't interested in anyone. He didn't bring my name up, but he said she made it pretty clear she isn't. It looks to me like another girl that has her standards out of line with reality. Very common in this church, it seems. She will be 31 soon. I've come to the realization that when a girl reaches her late 20s-early 30s and doesn't get married, there is usually a very good reason for it. It isn't just bad luck, it's that they are caught up in a reality that doesn't really exist. Social media has created a false reality where there's this perfect guy that is gonna come out of nowhere and do all these amazing things and they are gonna travel the world together and live happily ever after.

This is a fairy tale. The same way men get lost in a false reality of finding 10/10 girls that are going to be worth their time after watching countless hours of porn. It doesn't become completely obvious that we are overlooking those that are right in front of us until we break out of this mental prison that we put ourselves in. Quit porn for a few months and tell me that these girls that used to look very average don't start to look attractive. You can go right back to watching porn after making that realization, but what you have learned from that experience will stick with you.

Anyway, his advice was to move on. After we spoke, I got the impression that I should read my patriarchal blessing. I haven't done that in a very very long time. I don't know what I'm supposed to take from it right now besides that I really need to do better in scripture study and living the covenants I've made.

So what I've learned is that I may never see her again. And even if I do, it isn't worth my time. I've done all I can do in reaching out, and given that I was ignored the last time it's a pretty good indication that I should stop wasting my time. Why I keep being pushed towards her I don't really know, and I don't expect it to stop unless she really does leave this place. I'll take things as they come, follow the promptings that I get, but I won't have any expectations of anything.


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On another topic: I'm sure everyone here has heard of/seen the Gillette ad. I never used Gillette, but I recently decided to take up wet shaving with a safety razor. It's actually not that difficult to get a good shave without hacking your face up. I would highly recommend every man do this. The money saved not buying razor cartridges is insane. Just buy a nice handle and you can get replacement double edge razors for $10-$15 per box of 50-100 depending what blades you like.

Better shave, much more manly, and saves money. Perfect combonation



First I'm glad that you're back and all is well more or less. You had a hunch that something was wrong with her so let it go. One day you will just fall into a situation that works better for you, meanwhile stick to your purpose.

I always say: All glory be to thee oh Lord, thank you for everything. I have absolutely nothing to complain about. This is my personal prayer. I figure that the almighty gets so many complaints that my simple manly thank you will get his attention and maybe make him smile that day. Eventually something good always happens when I selflessly offer my simple thank you.


I don't know what you think of this guy but this clip made me laugh.

What Pisses Me Off About "We Believe: The Best Men Can Be | Gillette (Short Film)"


I think the Best Response to Gillette Ad? Opt Out of Consumer Society…Forever

I've had a beard since 2007 I use a WAHL Hair Clipper it has combs that go on the business end. I use a 1/4 inch in summer and 1/2 inch in winter. I buzz my whole head then clean shave around the edges, neck and so on. I was clean when the wife was alive she liked that best. But I'm retired now and it feels more comfy, saves time and keeps my chin warm. Your way is the best and saves money too.

Take care :^)



>First I'm glad that you're back and all is well more or less

I'll try not to disappear again.

>more or less

I found a card at work for $100 off my next wine purchase, so maybe a little less tbh. 12 bottles will be here tomorrow. I gotta quit this shit.

>meanwhile stick to your purpose.

I wish I knew what it was.

>I don't know what you think of this guy but this clip made me laugh.

As much as /pol/ hates him, I don't mind him. Every once in a while he makes a really great video. There are good reasons to dislike him, but I can't deny that he does make some good videos.

>I've had a beard since 2007

Unfortunately, I can't grow facial hair very well so my best bet is a clean shave tbh. I wish I would have gotten into wet shaving a long time ago. Would have saved me a lot of money.



>next wine purchase

What kind do you like, is it red or white?

Trader Joe's has good deals


>purpose: I wish I knew what it was.

It's a code of manhood, like the 10 commandments, so important that you never deviate very far from it.

A woman can't make you stray from it, they aren't as important. It's the juice that makes a man Alpha.

The very foundation of your building, and self improvement.

To live you need you need three things,

income, affection, satisfaction.

A source of income, to pay your way.

A source of affection, to be happy.

And satisfaction to give meaning to life;

it should come from your purpose.

These sources define your life. It's up to

you to maintain your sources and to give

direction to your life. Remember that a

good woman means that she can never

lie to you, if she ever does you can never trust

her again. Females make things more complicated

then they have to be, and their thinking is unrefined

and backward, selfish and childlike. Some people

think it's better to have a partner, the icing on the cake.

But I can tell you these things from experience because

I know how bad it can get. At first a good woman seems

worth it because of companionship. After the 4th year

they begin to get tired of you, it doesn't matter how big

your manhood is, how smart you are, or how much money

you have. What happens between a man and a woman is

like death, no one escapes it. Ronin Man on youtube has some good advice, he's fair and reasonable, and always tells the truth, that is very rare.

>Unfortunately, I can't grow facial hair very well.

The older you get the faster it fills in, later you'll wish it didn't

grow so much, you will have hair everywhere but where you need it. I'll let you go young man, thanks for the chat I appreciate it, take care. :^)



>What kind do you like, is it red or white?

I tend to lean towards red, but I'm not that picky. I bought a box of 12 different red wines so this should be interesting. Cost me under $100 after my discount. This was from a site called nakedwines. They apparently bottle wines from independent wine makers all over the world. I just ordered one of their mixed boxes of the top rated stuff their users like. We will see if it's any good, but for under $100 this looks like a pretty good deal. Gonna try it out tonight even though I have work tomorrow :^)

>Trader Joe's has good deals

Interesting. I should quit but if I end up buying more, I'll have to take a look.

>A source of income, to pay your way.

Check, but I need a better one tbh

>A source of affection, to be happy.

This is where the girl comes in

>And satisfaction to give meaning to life;

This one is gonna take some effort. It seems to be a culmination of the other 2 for me.



I've read many enology books and had a collection of vintage wines, but never enough money to buy enough at one time to make a cellar. It can become an addiction very easily. I always bought by the case, you always get something off. I liked all good wines, white and red.

Trader Joe's used to have very good everyday wine for $3. a bottle, that was 12 years ago. Boy time flies, I'm glad I don't drink anymore. When I learned meditation the craving and addiction disappeared, that was 2007 haven't had a drop since. I really enjoyed wine because it goes so well with food, actually wine is food, fermented food. Fruit juice is good for you, too much alcohol is bad for you. The more you know about it the more you can appreciate it, the problem is that it's an expensive hobby and you will drink more of it over time.

>This is where the girl comes in

You will learn the hard way about girls, but everyone does. Try to find one that's blind or mildly handicapped to make her dependent on you. She will be more likely to be loyal also. I think that would be a good strategy for these fickle modern girls. A friend has a blind wife, he affectionately calls her, Blind date. Anyway he is very happy, I have never heard a complaint from him in more than 30 years.

>This one is gonna take some effort. It seems to be a culmination of the other 2 for me.

You need all three working together to be happy enough, I think you're on the right foot. You have to be patient with women, try not to criticize. Instead be a good example and out think her, they are childlike in many ways. I wish you all the good things you are hoping for.



>the problem is that it's an expensive hobby and you will drink more of it over time

I gotta quit. I didn't plan to do this again and the card I found at work was obviously a test, and I failed. I can't keep doing this though. I actually had a legit hang over all day during work, and still took overtime. Now I'm sitting here trying to drink the last glass of the bottle of wine I didn't finish, and it's making me sick just sipping it.

>You will learn the hard way about girls

If I don't try I may as well not even consider myself a man, and just put a bullet in my head tbh. It's extremely difficult right now, but there was a time where I was going to end it all. I'm at a pretty high point right now in comparison to then. I have my doubts I'm going to accomplish my goal, but I feel like I'm so close. I'm in the right place, it's just a matter of time.

I need to stop messing around and start asking girls out and see where it takes me. That's what I've been struggling with lately, for a few different reasons. I'm on the verge of doing it though. I have ideas of who to ask, and what we would do together. I have a friend that wants to go on double dates, and I know I should have taken his advice and asked the quiet girl out already. I think I'm gonna do it very soon.

>I wish you all the good things you are hoping for

Thank you. I will continue fighting until I accomplish the things I'm setting out to do.



What an interesting start to my day. I worked until 1:30 AM last night, stayed up until around 4 AM, got woken up by barking dogs at 8 AM, checked my phone, and I had a message. A message from a girl at church. It was the same girl that texted me during christmas to wish me a merry christmas. Maybe I should have taken the hint back then, but I really think she may actually be interested in me. I figured maybe she texted everyone in my ward but maybe she was thinking about me back then, and maybe I've been on her mind for a while.

We have been texting back and forth all morning.



Lots of good ideas in there, I didn't mean to get you down.

I'm 64 this year my Dad lived to be 94, so I could live another 30 years, if anyone has a reason to be depressed it's me but I'm not. I'm going to share my secret. Back story: You already know that I've been a Monk for 12 years, when my wife of 28 years died from cancer that was the absolute bottom for me. That was the main reason I became a Monk, what else can a retired Samurai become. I've been a martial artist all my life, served one tour in Desert Storm 1 USAF E6 Red Horse, was too young for Viet Nam, and I'm glad I missed that one. If you came back from that one you were never the same.

When she died my kids were grown and on their own. I found a place to hide in the back woods near Willow Springs Missouri. I lived with Monks from India and all parts of the world. Not because I wanted to, but because they needed someone to maintain the place in exchange for a small stipend, trailer in the forest and meals. I stayed 2 years and hid from the world, when I left I was running the place.


This is where I first learned meditation and it wasn't a very good lesson. But I researched it online and read everything I could find on the subject. It took me 5 years to stop crying every time I remembered my wife. Over that time I was so tired of life that I just surrendered to whatever happened because it didn't really matter anymore. I found and worked out the best way to help myself die. I had quite a bit of free time to research and work on problems that most people never think about. I just worked hard physical labor cutting and splitting firewood to heat 12 buildings, doing repairs staying busy. Everyday we had 1 hr of meditation as a group at 5am then breakfast and again at 6pm, then dinner, and bedtime. I was 53 in the best physical shape of my life. My Uncle USMC, made Lieutenant in the field, served in Korea, my Father USMC also served in Korea. I grew up around tough strong men, I worked from 12 years old construction in a family business. My Grandfather was a fireman for 30 years. And still, loosing my wife completely kicked my ass.


One day I'm in the forest resting after running a chainsaw for about 4 hours. There was nothing but nature sounds and sights, nothing man made. Suddenly I realized that all there is, is life. Nothing man made is alive, we make tools but we can't make life. We live in our dead dream and forget the most important thing in our pathetic lives, until it's gone.

From that day on I decided to be happy. When I wake up in that moment I decide to be happy, if you do this it becomes a habit, and even if something shocks you it's easier to recover, and remember to be happy. Do you understand? People live in a dream created by other humans living in a dream. To be happy you must decide to be that. If life is imaginary then imagine a reason to be happy. Stay away from the dark side because the gravity is so strong that it will kill you. And I never complain to God because it can always be worse but so far it isn't. I try to remember to thank him for everything because I have nothing to complain about. I endure, try to do the right thing simply because it's the right thing to do, a smile is enough reward.


>We have been texting back and forth all morning.

Great news go get her, tell her your plans for the both of you, if she smiles you're in. :^)



Thanks for sharing that with me.

>From that day on I decided to be happy. When I wake up in that moment I decide to be happy, if you do this it becomes a habit, and even if something shocks you it's easier to recover, and remember to be happy. Do you understand? People live in a dream created by other humans living in a dream. To be happy you must decide to be that. If life is imaginary then imagine a reason to be happy. Stay away from the dark side because the gravity is so strong that it will kill you. And I never complain to God because it can always be worse but so far it isn't. I try to remember to thank him for everything because I have nothing to complain about. I endure, try to do the right thing simply because it's the right thing to do, a smile is enough reward.

This is good advice.

>Great news go get her, tell her your plans for the both of you, if she smiles you're in. :^)

I know the exact moment that she became interested in me. There was a live stream after church near christmas time, and it was a couple talks and a lot of hymns. I sat next to her, and I noticed she had a hymn book out. As the stream started I kept looking at her hymn book to see what she was looking up, and it turned out she wanted to sing along with the hymns in the live stream. She offered to share the hymn book with me, and we got really close together and sang along with the hymns.

It was the best time I've ever had with a girl at church, and I should have probably taken the hint right there that there was something there but of course I didn't. I felt like I should get to know her, but I feel like that with all the girls. There are cuter girls in my ward, but this one is real. She has all the good qualities that you would want. She's probably a 6/10 in looks, but loyalty is more important.

I just need a girl that only wants to be a girl not an (((empowered womyn))), is cute enough to look at, and is completely loyal to me. So far she is the only girl to reach out to me in this way. I'm on her mind, instead of the other way around. She wasn't on my mind, but now that I know she had me in mind she is on my mind as well. I'm going to focus on this girl from now on and see where it goes.





I'm gonna ask her out. My friend has an idea for a double date. He wants to go ice skating. I've never done that, but I'm willing to try. Me and him have been talking about a double date for a while, but his date ideas were always too much. Ice skating sounds like a good first date to me. I'm gonna go running with him tomorrow, and we will get the details worked out. Then I'll ask her out that same day. I haven't felt this strongly that I should ask a girl out since the last couple girls I asked out. It doesn't get anymore obvious that this one is interested though. He wanted me to ask out the quiet girl, but it didn't feel right. This feels right. If she says yes, I'm going to finish all my wine this week and quit for good.


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I've noticed a complete change in your attitude. Sounds like a good plan, have fun she seems like a nice girl, Make it happen. :^)


hex, here is a collection of stories in a movie format. If you need something to occupy your time so you won't drink or whatever, this is a very good one, I'm sure that you will enjoy it. :^)

The Ballad of Buster Scruggs 2018 1080p





I just gotta make sure this plan is set in stone with my friend tomorrow. Then I'll ask her. I hate doing it through text, but I won't see her again until Sunday. I suppose it doesn't matter how it's done, just that it gets done. It's the next step and I have to take it regardless of how I take it. As long as I receive an answer, that's all that matters.

>hex, here is a collection of stories in a movie format. If you need something to occupy your time so you won't drink or whatever, this is a very good one, I'm sure that you will enjoy it. :^)

Thanks, I'll check it out. I will say though, I have 6 more bottles of wine and I plan to drink every night until they are gone. It sounds terrible, and it probably will be terrible but I need to quit this immediately. Especially if I end up dating this girl. She deserves a man that is living the life that and not faking living the life.



I thought you asked her out already, ask her out now so she can plan for it and can look forward to it. People need time to do things they can't drop everything else to do what you want with no warning. Call everyone today and talk to them. You won't be disappointed, she deserves you. When it's time; I'm going to suggest that you replace your alcohol with meditation, a good habit should always replace a bad one, fill that spot with a good thing.

In the beginning; Set aside 10 minutes, in a comfy place where you can put your back against a wall and close your eyes. I like to use a blanket so I don't get cold. Set a timer, do this twice a day in the same spot preferably. Don't do anything else but sit still, whatever happens, just let it happen. The only goal is to sit still. Breath deeply and relax until the time is up. As this becomes easier add another 5 minutes until you can sit for 30 minutes. This will help you to remove anxiety, I will explain more as we go. :^)


I haven't been here in a while, I'll read posts in a bit. I'm getting the Melchizedek Priesthood in a couple of weeks. I'm just sick of the Cathodox and liberal Christian crowd online. They're fucking cancer. They praise institutions ("Mother Church") and basically throw the Bible away in their version of Christianity. Prominent people in Christian podcasts have shunned me for being Mormon, them being Orthodox. They canonized a fucking gay Saint for fucks sake. They're not as bad as the Catholics, but this notion that we're not real Christianity makes me sick.

I consider both congregationalist (Churches of Christ) Christians and Mormons to be those following true Christianity than those that worship idols.

Jesus Fucking Christ.


I've found out that most Cathodox are LARPers that seem to be going through a phase and that do it mostly as an ideological political stance than as true faith. Their denominations have the ideological strength they need to LARP, since these are monstrous institutions that have gone through wars and that have been used by the State to promote traditionalism.

Any sane person would read though their doctrine and recognize paganism and something 'off' in a heartbeat, but they'd rather put the false God of politics over Heavenly Father when it comes to worship. Fucking retards.



Funniest part is that we're open to dialogue with them but they aren't.


Please don't curse here:

If you understand the concept of competition, think about it and stop fighting . It isn't a real fight, don't get caught up in an emotional response to fiction. Sit down and close your eyes, breath deeply, relax and think about what the father really wants from you as a person in their right mind. The answer will come to you, thank the father and be happy now.



>I thought you asked her out already, ask her out now so she can plan for it and can look forward to it.

My friend bailed on the whole going running thing, so I haven't been able to confirm with him that it's gonna happen on Saturday. I've gotten a hold of him but he still hasn't confirmed that he will come on Saturday even though it was his idea. I don't need him flaking on me if I propose it as a double date. It's definitely gonna happen, it's just a matter of if it's gonna be just me and her or a double date. I'd rather it be a double just because double dates are a great way to have a first date with minimal pressure.


Mainstream Christianity has been kiked pretty hard. The longer I'm a part of this church the more fortunate I feel that I joined this one and not another one first. We have our issues, but we also have the best interpretation of the gospel.



>I'm getting the Melchizedek Priesthood in a couple of weeks

That's great news! Have you been able to pass or bless the sacrament yet? Being able to perform blessings is a pretty big step forward. I've done quite a few blessings in my short time just because of my calling.



>my calling

Also, I don't know if I mentioned this: I got moved from 2nd councilor to 1st councilor in the elders quorum recently. Not a huge change, but still pretty cool.



You and her should go somewhere by yourselves. Ask her what she would like to do for an hour or two, she will tell you. 1st date: don't spend more than $25., second date no more than $75., like if you go to dinner. This way if by then if she isn't trying to be romantic you don't have much invested and can walk away. Don't let her make you a friend, you want to be lovers or no deal. And you should know this by the second date. She should know that you are seriously looking for a wife. If she just wants to hang out or talk to you on the phone keep looking for the wife. If she isn't physically hanging on you, touching and holding your hand, hugging, maybe a kiss, something is wrong.

Places to go: A scenic drive, Library, museum, a bite to eat, do laundry, movie, there are 100 more simple places to go where you can get to know each other. If things go well: Valentines day is coming, do something special, women like a guy to be romantic. I asked for my wife's hand in marriage on that day. They love flowers and chocolate covered cherries. Just do it no excuses, stop stalling, no fear. :^)



Haven't been able to pass or bless the Sacrament yet. I might be called to give a testimony or a Gospel topic though.

Also, what's been up lately? I hadn't visited in about 3 weeks



Also, the guy I mentioned said that "the weakest Catholic is closer to true Christianity than the strongest Mormon".

smh pagans



>You and her should go somewhere by yourselves

We are gonna have to because this guy isn't answering me.

>Valentines day is coming


It's been almost a year since the last time I asked a girl out.


>Also, what's been up lately?

Failure failure and more failure. I've had so much wine over the last week that the scent is starting to make me sick. How much I'm drinking is terrible, but once it's gone I want to quit this time for real. When that girl reached out to me it really woke me up. This has to stop.


>the weakest Catholic is closer to true Christianity than the strongest Mormon

So the cuck pope himself?



>the scent is starting to make me sick

Drinking it is even worse. 3 bottles to go.



>3 bottles to go.

Just pour them out right now. Keeping them is the addiction saying you are not ready just yet. It is like the smoker that tells himself he will be ready after he smokes the rest of the pack, but then quickly buys another as the last cigarette approaches. You have to throw it all away when you are absolutely ready. No treatment center ever told someone "just finish all your crack/meth and we will be ready to begin." Destroy the supply now.



>So the cuck pope himself?

Have you watched the new…

Robin Hood 2018 1080p HDRip


The story is about The Catholic Extortion Machine,

based on the real history, enjoy.


Hex: you have confirmed my concerns about you.

You are the only thing standing in the way of your ultimate success. Call your girlfriend and talk about it with her please. She will understand and help you overcome your worst fears.

That is all you have to do to begin the process, if she is the one, the problem will be solved by her.

Take care :^)



I see you've got a date now, excellent job! And well, yeah, the wine's an issue, but it's an understandable misstep. It's like me with coffee, I just can't seem to quit it or else I begin to feel extremely sick.

In my case it's been almost two years since I asked a girl out.

Also it seems this Melchizedek Priesthood is some serious deal, I had an overview of it with my bishop and some two other authorities with another potential Elder. I'll have an interview with the President of the Quorum next week and eventually I'll receive the Priesthood during a Stake Conference.



>You are the only thing standing in the way of your ultimate success



>I see you've got a date now

Not yet, but soon.

>And well, yeah, the wine's an issue, but it's an understandable misstep

If things work out how I hope they are going to, quitting will be easy. If not it will be harder, but I still want to quit.

>Also it seems this Melchizedek Priesthood is some serious deal


>I'll have an interview with the President of the Quorum next week and eventually I'll receive the Priesthood during a Stake Conference.

Usually after the interview you will be ordained to elder in elders quorum by whoever you choose to do it. Stake conference will be when you are sustained as an elder.


Things are about to get a whole lot more interesting at work. I had a manager try to intimidate me today. It's not gonna happen. I have a friend that is basically a self educated lawyer that has been slapping these managers around good for years in this company. I'm meeting up with him tomorrow to go over how I should respond to this.

I can say this right now: no manager is ever going to treat me that way again. I was nice and didn't say anything back to him just because I know not to shoot myself in the foot before I know the best course of action. I'm gonna do my research. I'm gonna take full advantage of every state law and every right granted to me by my union to put this guy back in his place.

They think I'm just a dumb, low level worker. They don't realize who they are messing with. I may be young. I may be inexperienced. I'm not stupid. My entire life is logic and problem solving. I'm a software developer working as a low wage laborer for now. I am anything but stupid. The thing is I'm protected in a lot of ways right now. By my union. By state law. By company ethics policy. This guy has no idea the beast he has just unleashed upon himself treating me the way he did.


I'll admit I'm gonna miss being this drunk. So drunk that when I wake up I won't remember. It's great to have the pain completely numbed. Even if only temporarily. This is it though. This is the end of it.



>Usually after the interview you will be ordained to elder in elders quorum by whoever you choose to do it. Stake conference will be when you are sustained as an elder.

Yep, I was told about this. I'm also reading two gigantic manuals on the Duties and Blessings of the Priesthood. About 600 pages in total.


I have no idea about what's going on in this situation but it reminds me of when this girl tried to fake a #MeToo on me, accusing me of sexual harrassment among other things in her groupchats, in one of the screenshots she took my picture from somewhere and full name and told people to run me over.

Needless to say, due to the false sexual accusations and false power she has, I went to the Disciplinary Commitee and used full force with persuasion laws from the 48 Laws of Power and wiped her out. She is now out of my college, or if she's here, she has to take an entire Discipline course and has a permanent shitstain on her record. Basically put out the woman in her place because women have no authority over men.


I relapse all the time with cigarettes. I usually smoke two per week. Or one and a half, because guilt wins. I also still drink coffee, that's something I haven't been able to shake off, but I think from all the duties I'll have as an Elder, coffee is the least of my worries and I think I'll continue to drink caffeine nonetheless.


I always keep this thread on constant auto-refresh so when the time comes and everyone's on schedule I can be notified for when we can have a conversation, heh.


Well, I'm in page 60 of 630-something for the preparation for the Melchizedek Priesthood. This is kind of tiring for someone that gets easily tired.



>I can say this right now: no manager is ever going to treat me that way again.

You said you were union, did you talk with a shop steward, you need to document it?




It's interesting that the visual aids given in this manual mostly feature minorities. I should check what year is this from. I've reached a very interesting part about ministering and teaching from the Scriptures and teaching the Gospel with guiding of the Spirit. Seems it's from the year 2000.



Nice, thanks!

I might finish the first manual and use those summaries for the second one. I'm already halfway done with the first one.



I guess around the year 2000 the idea of multiculturalism was booming, so it was really trendy and not that cliché or tacky to basically portray multiculturalism absolutely everywhere. The manual's gets interesting whenever it talks about the Book of Mormon.



It started with affirmative action and post modernism.


60 pages to finish the first manual/guide. I'll do it tomorrow. I'm not sure if I should read the second one or go for the summaries. I'll see then.


30 pages into the second manual. This is sort of insane, but it does teach you all the right stuff. Either way, it makes me quite tired but I want to achieve this.



Good. :^)

Those who dance are considered mad by those who cannot hear the music.

mountain 2017





You are reading a lot more than I did before becoming an elder. I just had a member of the bishopric go over the most important stuff with me for about an hour. He had a powerpoint presentation, and some scriptures to share from D&C. That was it.



I sure was right about not remembering. I definitely don't remember posting that. The alcohol is gone though. I also just deleted my porn folder again. These next few days are probably gonna be a little rough. Also, I texted that girl and never got a response. All too familiar. Don't really care right now tbh.



>Don't really care right now tbh.

My entire focus right now is fixing what damage I've done to myself over the last month or so.



Really though I have to admit, it's been longer than the last month. The last month has just been where things took a turn for the worst.



By insane I meant an insane task, but also, the Melchizedek Priesthood is insane in an awesome way, and it will be an honor to have it.


Yeah, I also got some D&C scriptures to read and an LDS pamphlet that's a Family Guide, but he mentioned that he used to give some very long manuals, but that we should email him if we don't find them.


I'm free from porn. What helps a lot is remembering that it's an industry made by Jews and that the amateur branch is fueled by mentally ill thots that are only worthy to go to the ovens for defiling their bodies for the entire world to see. Virtual prostitutes.

>Also, I texted that girl and never got a response. All too familiar. Don't really care right now tbh.

lol I've lived this countless times. I never really make it in that regard. Eventually they stop answering or they end up getting bfs or there's no interest from their part.



What happened? All the booze? And I also heard but didn't read that there were some problems with a manager. Good thing that you have someone to back you up, like I did for myself with that e-thot. In my case, a culture that favors men and doesn't go for #MeToo bullshit was what backed me up.


File: 0b9d451dd868032⋯.png (44.69 KB, 543x162, 181:54, Screenshot 2019-02-02 at 2….png)

File: b014c4e1dca4180⋯.png (24.28 KB, 476x235, 476:235, Screenshot 2019-02-02 at 2….png)

Two more steps that I can make on my own. And that final one requires some practice, effort, and luck. We need to make it to the Celestial, lads.


66 pages into the second manual, aka Duties and Blessings of the Priesthood, Part B. I think I'll just finish it tomorrow and go where I'm in invited to at 5PM.



>ripped suit

and a ripped body someday



So why did you do that to your self?

Ultimately this is the question you need to answer. :^)


I think I might ask for a blessing for this chronic dizziness that doesn't seem to go away. My bishop gave me a blessing for depression and it worked.


I'm tempted to drink


I desecrated the Lord's day with liquor, beer, and a cigarette to avoid dizziness. Welp. And I keep going. I'm a fucking mess.



>What happened? All the booze?



Because I'm weak


Do it



Well, I did terribly. I sometimes, due to the accident I had in 2014 that gave me HPPD, drink alcohol to make my brain not feel like a brick.

So at the birthday party of a friend, that matched with the day of the Superbowl, I drank. And not only that, but I also smoked just for the sake of smoking. With my Sunday clothes on. In the morning I also smoked to get rid of some nausea caused by a medication that I got prescribed for pseudonarcolepsy.

Basically, I tore the Word of Wisdom to pieces.

I will fast tomorrow for repentance and finish reading my manual and continue reading the Book of Mormon. I hope Heavenly Father can forgive my transgressions.



>Because I'm weak

No, most people would say that you lack discipline.

But actually you lack understanding, because if you truly understood

you wouldn't do it anymore.


>I hope Heavenly Father can forgive me.

God dosen't work that way. Love the father

the way that he loves you, by forgiving yourself.

I like this guy maybe you two will find some comfort here.

This is a bit advanced for your level of understanding but I'll take the chance. Don't punish yourselves it's a waste of energy, it's not productive

at all.

David R Hawkins ~ Why Do We Find Comfort On Alcohol & Drugs


David R. Hawkins - Instructions on Meditation


Transcending the Experiencer - Various Excerpts, Dr. David Hawkins


David R. Hawkins: Understanding Higher Consciousness



Got my Ancestry kit back, turns out I'm 50% white, 44% Amerindian, and 6% Nigger. Welp, I knew there was some Curse of Cain there.


Those were some good vids


Dealt with more anti-Mormons today in a Discord server. Orthodox, Catholics, Protestants, you name it. The administrator even got pissed off at me simply for being a Mormon. Said "My head is about to blow up".

I'm beginning to get used to it, and in my mission I'll probably get that.



It's as if we were magnets for anti-Mormons. Now I see why interdenominational conversation was banned in this board. It's useless to try to even have a decent conversation, non-religious, because they'll sperg out about our beliefs. They could even talk to a kike regularly but not to a Mormon.

They can suck the pope's Muslim sucking dick.



If you work on your vocabulary not only will you become a better speaker and descriptive writer. You will be respected and admired by your enemies for being a good example of an elite consciousness. Just refuse to use derogatory slang and curse words.



I rarely use curse words, however, I did get angry when writing the post, and rightfully so. They just cannot tolerate Mormons. I never got angry with them or swore, but they got to the point of almost swearing.

They're infested with pagan doctrine and they profess to be wise when they desecrate Scripture in every way possible. They criticize exaltation when the Orthodox have theosis and even the Catholics believe in the deification of man in certain cases. They don't know their own theology.



Then again, they worship a woman, so it's to be expected that they're a bit off.



The old faith is jealous of any competition especially if you're happy and healthy.



…and they were told there can be only one.



>Now I see why interdenominational conversation was banned in this board

Yeah, I'm just returning the favor to /christian/ where they don't even consider us Christians. If their board is only about what they consider Christian, then this board will be our home and none of them will be tolerated here just as they will not tolerate us there.

Post last edited at



Forgot trip. Also, sorry I said I wouldn't disappear again. I kinda did.




Most traditional god people are lost and confused, trying to find meaning in a lunatic asylum. Once you realize that it's just a story, and that everyone has a favorite story about how things are supposed to work; then you can begin to make progress. You can see how to walk between the raindrops and make something good happen. But still it's temporary, and will only last for your life time, eventually everything changes. It's the only thing we can truly count on, that tomorrow will be different. Thank you for the story of you someplace in time.



I understand better than you think. Lately I've come to terms with the fact that all of this is just a tool that I'm using. I knew it in the beginning but at some point I got caught up in it. Now I know for sure that it is only a tool. What I want can be obtained through use of this tool. I may be considered a hypocrite, a snake, a sociopath. Whatever it is that people want to label me for doing this but this is the position the world has put me in. The only way to win is to take advantage of the systems available to get what I need. What I need is a white wife and family, and how I can get it is through living this lifestyle. At least for now.



I know you understand but you're a little stubborn. I've told you several times that you are a good man, don't punish or doubt yourself, your reasons are valid. All you can do is the best that you can do, no one can do better than that. If people judge you for being honest they don't deserve your friendship, but offer it anyway. Everyone in the church and in the world as fact is doing the same thing you are; just trying to find a soft place to land.

>hypocrite, a snake, a sociopath.

Don't blame the world for what they don't understand, these are just words, they don't describe who you really are. If you want a good life and your own family, go to the fathers that want a good man for their daughter, and ask them for help. They want the same thing that you do, make friends with them so they can see who you really are. Your marriage will be arranged with a compatible girl, and she won't be a brat. Mormons are practical and strong people especially if you marry into an old family. Now about meditation, it's more important than you know to keep your head straight. If you want to really be at your best, you need alone time everyday with your eyes closed. I know it's the hardest thing at first, but the benefits will amaze you in a short time, it's a good habit to have…take care. :^)



>I've told you several times that you are a good man, don't punish or doubt yourself, your reasons are valid.



>Lately I've come to terms with the fact that all of this is just a tool that I'm using.

What do you mean with this, btw?




Also keep in mind that when you marry you are marrying a family not just a girl. So take your time and find a family that you are compatible with. Because you have to get along with them, especially the women, they will kill you before the men will. If you want to know what your wife will turn into when they hit menopause, look at the mothers. All young girls eventually turn into their mother. Menopause is very difficult for women, but even more so for you, they will give you their pain, you have to be strong and have good friends within the family. I hope this helps. :^)



>What do you mean with this, btw?

What I mean is that the best version of Christianity(Mormonism) is built on lies that have been admitted to, but intentionally made difficult to find the truth about. The original church created something amazing based on these lies, while the current iteration of the church will collapse under them. First through alienation of the most conservative of its members by making changes to policy and doctrine that should remain unchanged. Then will come the alienation of the less conservative of its members when they learn the truth about these lies that has been hidden from them.

The hardcore members don't care so much about the past because we can understand the necessity of it. We don't need to research it. The less conservative members favor themselves as intellectuals and will be so caught up in trying to look non-bigoted that they will virtue signal the church to death. Leadership has shown that they are going to cater to these useless virtue signalers just like every other organization does, and we have seen what happens as a result of this. These useless virtue signalers are the ones that will do the research into the past when shown that there is stuff that has been kept hidden from them, and they will be the quickest to abandon the church even as the church itself bends over backwards for them.

I care not for what happened in the past, except that it created something that would have been as close to perfect as we could get from a white religion had it held its ground on certain policies. The 2 hour church thing kinda sealed the fate of the church in my opinion. The stronger families will get stronger, but only temporarily. As long as they can keep their kids off the internet enough that they don't discover the truth. But this also hinges on keeping their kids from the world in general which is becoming more and more difficult. The public school system will create the seed which will grow in them and cause them to question things, and when they do there will be a point where these things cannot be kept from them any longer.

Maybe I'm wrong. We will see. All I know is what I need to accomplish for myself, and what I need to accomplish can be accomplished in this church right now but will become increasingly difficult for anyone to accomplish going forward.



When was anything the same ever again? I remember when everyone drank alcohol as a lifestyle and drove drunk, it was considered normal. As you can guess there were lots of crashes that killed a lot of people. Families and children were ejected out the windows of their vehicles, decapitated heads and so on, it was really bad. Laws were made to prevent this but not until Mothers grouped together and forced lawmakers to stop killing their children, stop drinking and driving and make a law to prevent bad behavior. This is when the shit really hit the fan and everything began to change, making many laws to prevent bad behavior. Did it stop bad behavior, no; ignorant people still kill each other everyday selfishly. It made life more complicated so complicated that you can't hardly fix anything anymore. Life is upside down, and it will never be simple again. If I were young again, I wouldn't want to be because the obstacles are to great to live the old fashioned conventional family lifestyle. It takes a lot of money for the level of comfort and security a family needs. And there is no foundation to support it anymore, it isn't impossible but almost. The old story has completely crashed and it's still burning. Everything from the past is being questioned and rejected. It's like they dropped acid in the water and the whole world is hallucinating. This will continue for several more generations, and what becomes of it you won't like. The biggest problems of this planet are not being resolved, they are being ignored for the most part because the people in charge can't fix them. As long as the old model (story) is the dream that people adhere to nothing can be fixed. The story has to change, to change your life change the story in your head. See all the way through from the beginning to the end, then you will know.




Current Population is Three Times the Sustainable Level

Global Footprint Network data shows that humanity uses the equivalent of 1.7 planet Earths to provide the renewable resources we use and absorb our waste.1 If all 7+ billion of us were to enjoy a European standard of living - which is about 60% the consumption of the average American - the Earth could sustainably support only about 2 billion people.


Any one want to talk about this?


Okay hex I'm going to leave here for awhile I have some work to do. And you have it handled, you don't need me talking in your ear. I wish you the best and every good thing in life young man, watch out for the sycophants, take care. :^)


I had a crisis during the middle of the week. A serious crisis, involving false allegations against me and the entire campus believing a lie about me. Ever since Wednesday I've been on a shock-like state and have only been sleeping and been in my room, avoiding people.

I'm supposed to get the Melchizedek Priesthood either today or tomorrow but I'm not getting out of my room. Waiting a year. I haven't shaved or showered and my psychiatrist considered it recommendable for me to get into a ward and stay for a while. Just thinking about it makes my heart race.



Thinking about the incident, that is



Take care, my friend. Hope to see you come back.

>And you have it handled

If only it were true tbh.



That's unfortunate. Good luck in dealing with all of it.


Today I went over to a friends house to prepare a team lesson for elders quorum. This whole thing is going to be difficult for me for a little while. I feel like I feel with the rest of the world. Like I have to hide a piece of myself or be cast out from it. Just as I can't talk about the lies of the jew inside or outside of church, I cannot talk about the lies of the church with people inside the church.

I agree with the values and a lot of the principles the church is based upon, but can I say I have a testimony of any of these men as prophets? Not really. Can I say I have a testimony that the book of Mormon is the word of God? Probably not tbh. Although it is a good book. Does any of this matter in achieving my goal? Not really. It's just a matter of taking my feelings out of it.

For now, I picked up a bottle of rum.



That's how I started out. Then my faith was pristine and got destroyed because reality rather than fiction kicked in. So I'm back where I started at achieving a certain goal.



Do what it takes to achieve your goals. Do not relent. Do not give up. No matter how discouraging things get, do not give in. That is how I approach this goal that I have. I want a white wife and family, and I will do whatever I have to to achieve it.

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