No.698561
>Strange things are happening in Nowhere, it's up to leeg to save Muriel!
No.698562
File: 1448227696670.jpg (70.39 KB, 500x677, 500:677, 500px-Cletus_Kasady_(Earth….jpg)
No.698563
I still don't understand why Master has me awake during daylight hours.
>>698562
Didn't Axis end?
No.698564
>>698563
yes but I can still find this old lady!
No.698565
>>698564
I was asked to venture into a populated city and watch people go about their mindless business.
It fascinates me how sheeplike people are now, they're in their own little world.
>
What's this about an old lady?
No.698566
File: 1448228134205.jpg (75.77 KB, 639x350, 639:350, Cletus_Kasady_(Earth-19411….jpg)
>>698565
did ya hear the narrator? we gotta find Muriel!
No.698567
>>698566
What a bother. The old crone better be thankful.
No.698568
>>698567
oh wonder what got her? dibs on killing it!
No.698569
>>698568
Maybe a cajun fox.
Dibs on eating it.
No.698570
>>698569
damnit! fine....so where do start looking?
No.698571
>>698570
We could follow that pink dog shouting "Muriel, I'll save you!"
No.698572
File: 1448228543332.jpg (794.45 KB, 810x1252, 405:626, 1414855-paint_the_town____….jpg)
No.698573
>>698572
>[Yakety Sax intensifies]
This all seems rather self-fulfilling.
No.698574
>>698573
what makes ya say that?
No.698575
File: 1448229047548.png (675.76 KB, 611x759, 611:759, 49a2d7eae0d2ab6ab518a27e41….png)
>>698574
The dog is-oh it got run over.
Well then. I should have known it wouldn't be that easy.
No.698576
File: 1448229188578.jpg (75.77 KB, 639x350, 639:350, Cletus_Kasady_(Earth-19411….jpg)
>>698575
damnit! that was our lead.....okay it's fine I got a guy on the inside
No.698578
>>698576
>ey b0ss
>im inside
No.698579
File: 1448229318918.jpg (272.57 KB, 1024x1462, 512:731, carnage_by_soul_drawer-d39….jpg)
>>698577
hold on he's calling
>>698578
whatcha got cactus?
No.698580
>>698579
>issa bigfoot b0ss
No.698581
>>698579
Cactus... nature's super spy.
No.698582
>>698581
yeah he got in when everyone was looking
>>698580
....how big we talking?
No.698583
>>698582
>Notorious B.I.G.
>biggie smalls
>flava flav
No.698584
>>698582
What a useful scamp.
No.698585
>>698584
I know I'm not adopting anymore but I'm so keeping him part of team C
>>698583
okay sit tight, we'll be there soon
No.698587
>>698585
Your daughter keeps trying to molest my niece despite the sonic vibrations.
No.698588
File: 1448230127586.jpg (107.47 KB, 830x572, 415:286, Cletus_Kasady_(Earth-92131….jpg)
>>698587
Red? I though she ran off to go be a ice skater?
No.698589
>>698588
Maybe it was one of those buds.
No.698590
>>698589
eh maybe, point is I ain't in the dad business no more
No.698591
>>698590
Good on you. Children are a pain.
No.698592
>>698591
I am well aware of that, I still got a sidekick and a dad as well as a cactus
No.698593
>>698592
And in your absence it seems people have taken to calling me "uncle Vlad".
It's almost cute.
No.698594
>>698593
HA now it's your turn!
No.698595
>>698594
I never asked for this.
No.698596
>>698595
they only way to be free is to pass it to another!
No.698597
>>698596
The goat woman, of course...
No.698598
>>698597
now ya getting it! say we're here, ready to do this?
No.698599
File: 1448231603025.jpg (71.98 KB, 500x707, 500:707, tumblr_nrq7rtuoIA1s41wxzo1….jpg)
>>698598
I am always ready.
No.698600
>>698599
>and so the two of them unleashed a unspeakable amount of hell on earth and freed a old lady
No.698601
>>698600
That wasn't so bad. Why was the old woman important again?
No.698602
>>698601
......shit I don't know, so ya seen that wind spirit around here?
No.698603
File: 1448232181678.png (675.76 KB, 611x759, 611:759, 49a2d7eae0d2ab6ab518a27e41….png)
>>698602
She is quite annoying. You could say... airheaded.
>
I'm making dad jokes. Someone stop me.
No.698604
>>698603
well I hate her! and no you have to get it out of ya system
No.698605
>>698604
She is like having a particularly petulant, spoiled brat of adaughter in the body of a grown woman.
Truly the worst.
No.698606
>>698605
.....we have to find a way to break her spirit
No.698607
>>698606
How does one break the wind?
...I've made a terrible mistake and left myself wide open for flatulence jokes.
No.698608
>>698607
yes and normally I'd take it, but I want to see that woman hurt bad......hhmmm well she has a boner for that pointy ear girl that's dumb as a brick
No.698609
>>698608
Durable too. To physical pain. My Noble Phantasm, Kazikli Bei, on the other hand... it causes pain in equal measure to the injustice someone has committed.
Every evil she's ever done is like a thousand spears ripping someone from the inside out.
They say that sins weigh terribly on the heart. I just make that phrase a reality.
No.698610
>>698609
as tempting as that is I have a feeling that she won't feel it or know it....unless you mean do it to the pointy eared girl
No.698611
>>698610
I was implying them both but that's just the thrill of impaling again.
The pointy-eared one will suffer.
No.698612
>>698611
sounds good, she was all "eh I want real beer or moonshine" and didn't once think to ask the Red guy!
No.698614
>>698612
"Wine is disgusting." Pah. As the humans say now, "that is the trash can: feel free to visit it any time."
No.698615
>>698614
as she should! that was good red wine!
>opines up a trash can
huh
No.698616
>>698615
...What the devil is that?
No.698617
>>698616
looks like Old Bold'n Brash
No.698618
>>698617
More like old Bald and Foolish.
No.698619
>>698618
....one job man, ya had one job
No.698620
File: 1448234986646.jpg (112.1 KB, 599x847, 599:847, 11219696_502299629951723_4….jpg)
No.698621
>>698620
well I won't call tell anybody
No.698622
>>698621
Good. I wonder where Saber went...
No.698623
>>698622
after pound cake last I heard
No.698624
>>698623
She has become a ravenous eater.
So, what have you been up to?
No.698625
>>698624
me and this cactus were chilling at the beach until that air head showed up!
No.698626
>>698625
The bald man was inquiring about my niece. He's odd.
No.698628
>>698627
The very same. Called her a monster. The nerve of some people.
No.698629
>>698628
he's a bit insensitive to others
No.698632
File: 1448237158517.png (535.36 KB, 530x886, 265:443, 680e878f3c7aab10b000d9f591….png)
No.698633
>>698632
that shit happens when ya go full bald
No.698635
File: 1448240144374.jpg (70.39 KB, 500x677, 500:677, 500px-Cletus_Kasady_(Earth….jpg)
No.698636
File: 1448240298942.png (394.75 KB, 614x707, 614:707, 84b35ad21ea2e7ed534266b883….png)
No.698637
File: 1448240341684.png (1.31 MB, 819x1160, 819:1160, 9ea990dedd1e620f476598974f….png)
>>698633
I am glad to have hair then.
sorry cooking dinner
>>698634
At least you're not in naked apron anymore.
No.698638
>>698637
we all are!
s'cool, had to shit
>>698636
we already took care of it!
No.698639
File: 1448240484631.png (1.02 MB, 1000x858, 500:429, 036eac78f625267b809e403a98….png)
>>698637
Nya?
>looks down
Not yet! When the time comes only the appropriate outfit must be chosen!
No.698640
>>698638
So you've met Tamamo?
>>698639
Maybe you could tell Nero that I am not a horse.
No.698642
File: 1448240911547.jpg (269.48 KB, 850x1200, 17:24, sample-35dbe53626fb2f61f74….jpg)
>>698638
No adventure?
>>698640
Blue is Nero's friend, yes. Tittysaber called me a dog, so I'm not happy.
>itches her ears with her back leg
No.698644
>>698641
The cat...fox...catfox?
>scratches beard
The woman here with us.
>>698642
...Please don't tell me she split all her tails off.
>oh
Is this what a migraine feels like? No wonder she constantly uses my hands to cool it down.
No.698646
File: 1448241077565.jpg (442.15 KB, 800x786, 400:393, 6c331542e558df7069b37c2a07….jpg)
>>698643
I wanna go on an adventure.
>>698644
She took back three!
>holds up both her paws and a foot
I dunno which ones she took though.
>bops a paw on Vlad's forehead
Better?
No.698647
>>698646
and I want to go home and eat a sub
No.698648
>>698645
I am too. Lord I am.
>>698646
>I don't know how to deal
...Yes, better.
>why am I the only Berserker with a rational mind
>stupid Joan Alter
>stupid Chaldea
>stupid Gilles
No.698649
>>698648
okay so just what is she? ya know like Lancer, Saber, Berserker?
No.698650
File: 1448241393229.png (638.9 KB, 714x1000, 357:500, a597d468ebb4cbcf632c34cb00….png)
>>698647
Oh! I want a sub now too!
>>698648
>pulls him into the fat cat tats
Master prefers it when I do it like this, nya!
No.698651
File: 1448241478787.jpg (43.15 KB, 349x534, 349:534, 1414811-362378_128910_carn….jpg)
>>698650
hey guess what else ya ain't getting tonight!?
No.698652
>>698649
She's a Berserker. Like me. Most of them are like that. imanaged to retain my mind.
>>698650
>UH
>tfw tall
>tfw essentially being bent over
>muffled vampire noises
No.698653
>>698652
so she can fly into a rage?
No.698654
>>698651
Can I go on an adventure now?
>>698652
>CAT STRONK
I hear you like it when Nero does it too!
No.698655
File: 1448241898474.jpg (75.77 KB, 639x350, 639:350, Cletus_Kasady_(Earth-19411….jpg)
>>698654
no! we are not going on an adventure! don't make me turn this van around, so help me I will!
No.698656
>>698653
>muffled "yes"
>>698654
>my back
>you can't do this
>I'm in charge here!
>muffled complaints
No.698657
>>698655
Van? Why are we going in a van?
>>698656
>releases Vlad
Better?
No.698658
File: 1448242118134.jpg (121.07 KB, 571x605, 571:605, Carnage-marvel-comics-1465….jpg)
>>698656
interesting....
>>698657
we aren't, I am
No.698659
>>698657
>gasping for air
>face as red as Nero's dress
Do not do that again.
>>698658
Most Berserkers are limited to yelling or basic speech. The rest able to talk are fixated on a single thing and can't really be communicated with, from what I've seen with Spartacus.
No.698660
File: 1448242279607.jpg (195.66 KB, 615x727, 615:727, Carnage-marvel-comics-1465….jpg)
>>698659
but you and her can talk and act alright.....well you anyways
No.698661
>>698660
My will is too strong to be deteriorated by Mad Enhancement. Tamamo is... a very special case.
No.698662
>>698661
she ain't human-ish
No.698663
File: 1448242692341.jpg (120.04 KB, 878x1024, 439:512, cf40408cc3c8c5ca5bbc8d77dd….jpg)
>>698658
>gasp
Is it an adventure van?
>>698659
Is Nero's better?
>pout
No.698664
>>698662
Neither am I.
>>698663
>well hers do smell like roses-no wait
I will have no part of that comparison.
No.698665
>>698663
no, it's my normal van seeing how my wife crashed my car
>>698664
yes but you are not cat...fox...thing
No.698666
File: 1448243045441.jpg (269.48 KB, 850x1200, 17:24, sample-35dbe53626fb2f61f74….jpg)
>>698664
You're in a unique position to compare! Blue won't do it so I take it upon myself!
>>698665
Can we go on van adventures?
No.698667
>>698666
no Satan we can not!
No.698668
>>698665
True. I don't get it either.
>>698666
>I'm going to regret this
...I would not be lying if I said the emperor's were more comforting.
No.698669
File: 1448243252519.jpg (364.75 KB, 495x700, 99:140, 396ac23866d0c69f2590e3e8bb….jpg)
>>698667
I'm not Satan, you goose!
>>698668
>HRUMPH
So it begins!
No.698670
>>698669
I'm not a goose you ninny!
>>698668
ya think she's related to them spirits?
No.698671
>>698669
>what have i become
>my sweetest friend
So what begins?
>>698670
She is another form of the mother of that black haired fox, if I am remembering right.
No.698673
>>698670
I'm not a ninny you nanny!
>>698671
Tamamo has to be the best wife of all!
>squish
Nyumu! This cat understands now!
No.698674
>>698672
I wouldn't know.
>>698673
>
>
>
>what have i done
Wife?
No.698675
>>698673
I'm not a nanny friend!
No.698676
>scruffy beardman
>catlady
>supervillan
Oooh, what kind of party have I stumbled in on?
No.698677
>>698674
oh wow did she just hook you in?
No.698678
File: 1448243773424.png (1.62 MB, 800x1124, 200:281, 254f8477cab039113371fcc5f9….png)
>>698674
Nyumu!
We have to be the best for Master! Letting Nero win is unacceptable!
>>698675
I am a friend, though!
No.698679
>>698678
well I'm not your friend guy!
>>698676
speaking of people I am not friends with
No.698680
File: 1448243884425.jpg (365.88 KB, 1000x1214, 500:607, 0b731110f37100b04b993765bd….jpg)
>>698676
It's kind of like a Bond movie isn't it?
>>698678
Oh, you're here too, Red?
>>698679
Still grumpy?
No.698681
File: 1448243997724.png (535.36 KB, 530x886, 265:443, 680e878f3c7aab10b000d9f591….png)
>>698676
>if by "scruffy" you mean "imperial" and "opulent", then yes
There you are.
>>698677
I have no idea.
>>698678
Nero is competing for your Master?
>I am so confused
Who is your Master, Tamamo.
No.698682
>>698676
An adventure party!
>>698679
I'm not a guy, pal!
>>698680
Ahri! Teach me to be the better wife!
No.698683
>>698680
I never got to bury you, and tell ya wind bag to stay away from me!
No.698684
File: 1448244028481.jpg (47.09 KB, 572x720, 143:180, tumblr_n7kaxhPRJ91s0adc8o5….jpg)
>>698679
I am not your buddy, pal!
>>698680
But bond is never that scruffy!
No.698685
>>698681
if this gets bad jump in the van
>>698682
that's not what she meant when she called you Red!.....also I'm not pal buddy!
>>698684
thank god for that
No.698686
File: 1448244129978.jpg (447.5 KB, 839x1091, 839:1091, 0f27832fdf649a33895a7f018e….jpg)
>>698682
Why are you asking me?!
>>698683
But Janna's nice!
>>698684
The villain's usually pretty eccentric though.
No.698687
>>698686
and ya just making me feel nothing but hate for her even more
No.698688
>>698681
Scruffy as in your face has hair on it, mr beardman
I am here!
>>698682
What kind of adventure?!
>>698685
I was being sarcastic
>>698686
Yeah, the red guy would fit that role pretty well indeed.
No.698689
File: 1448244264308.png (417.69 KB, 564x775, 564:775, c410d6d6a895ad8017f2d07ce4….png)
>>698681
Hakuno! We told Hakuno to wait for us!
>>698685
But I'm Red!
>>698686
Because you're the best at getting the attention of girls!
>>698688
Uhm... Subway.
No.698690
>>698688
I'm not! piss off or I'll get the cripple back to frighten you away with his cripple powers again
No.698691
>>698685
Duly noted, keep the seat warm just in case.
>>698688
Insolent brat. Have you no thoughts in that head?
Maybe it'd be put to better use on a pike.
>>698689
>I
>am
>so
>confused
Alright then.
No.698692
File: 1448244395575.jpg (42.03 KB, 501x600, 167:200, 0f88a65239b60d4c025a9139a1….jpg)
>>698687
Everything I do or say does that, though.
>>698688
Then there's the pet cat, and there's the mastermind with the beard.
>>698689
>facepalm
Now I'm definitely not helping you.
No.698693
>>698691
will do
>>698689
>>698692
>and now Carnage is laugh at Ahri for that comment
No.698694
>>698689
Are we eating fresh?
>>698690
Which cripple?
Is he cute?
>>698691
But scruffy isn't a bad thing!
It makes you more manly and stuff
that should be a good quality for a monarch, right?
>>698692
So they're all the villans!
So who's gonna be bond?
Ooh, you can be bond!
And I'll be the random girl that bond always gets with!
No.698695
File: 1448244559270.png (638.9 KB, 714x1000, 357:500, a597d468ebb4cbcf632c34cb00….png)
>>698691
Tamamo will win the Hakunobowl, just you watch!
>>698692
I order you as your mother to help me!
>>698693
Nyahaha! What's funny?
No.698696
>>698694
the guy in black that was at the beach
>>698695
nothing nothing, that was a good one, ya okay in my book
No.698697
File: 1448244650967.jpg (99.34 KB, 900x554, 450:277, 80b8a9774adebc7edb798f814a….jpg)
>>698693
Shut up!
>>698694
>"you can be bond"
Yes!
>"I'll be the random girl Bond always gets with"
No!
>>698695
It doesn't count! It doesn't work like that!
No.698698
>>698693
The knife-eared one isn't here yet...
>>698694
Peasants are scruffy. Rulers are imperial.
>>698695
>i almost want to watch this
Nero is stiff competition.
No.698699
>>698697
so whens ya coming out party?
No.698700
File: 1448244905380.jpg (485.9 KB, 888x1300, 222:325, tumblr_monidtd5n91sww1t3o1….jpg)
>>698696
the guy with the spider on his chest?
I couldn't even see his face!
>>698697
You have to take both!
>>698698
what about
scruffperial?
No.698701
File: 1448244924416.png (1.02 MB, 1000x858, 500:429, 036eac78f625267b809e403a98….png)
>>698696
Books are for nerds.
>>698697
Nyumu! The Emperor's word is law!
>>698698
She's also rather squishy, which is why Hakuno prefers her over Tamamo!
No.698702
>>698700
that was his face
>>698701
and Trix are for kids ya point?
>>698698
probably won't show up, I'll have cactus behind the wheel ready
No.698704
>>698702
What a skilled cactus.
>>698700
I do not have patience to try, girl. Tread lightly.
>>698701
I've noticed.
No.698705
>>698699
It's cancelled indefinitely.
>>698700
I'll take Bond, you can be the old bosslady which bond keeps running away from!
>>698701
Emperor? What are you talking about?
No.698706
>>698704
he really is, swear he was wasting away at his old home
No.698707
>>698702
oh
so about as interesting as your face
>>698701
Reading is important for your mind
>>698704
Tell me what I should call you, then!
No.698708
File: 1448245313498.jpg (195.09 KB, 566x800, 283:400, 5cb4d02d3889f4924d9bafd98e….jpg)
>>698702
Um... Nya?
>>698704
But Tamamo is domestic and squishy! You have experience, what can Tamamo do?
>>698705
Tamamo will beat Nero at the Hakunobowl!
>>698707
Neeeeerrrrrrrrrd!
No.698709
>>698707
pppfft yeah right my face is better looking then HIS!
>>698705
or until another woman shows up and hits on you? so does ya mom and sister know about you being gay?
>hello Ahri?
>this is your nerves speaking
>it's time to strangle the red guy
>no one will stop you
No.698710
>>698706
The goatwoman?
>>698707
I have already said it twice. Your brazen idiocy is wearing me thin.
>>698708
>uh
I don't know who told you I had experience, in life I never married.
What are your skills.
No.698711
>>698705
But I am neither old or bossy!
Just do what I say, Ahri!
>>698708
I would have never made it out of the slums of Zaun without reading!
>>698709
But it's the same pseudo-mask thing!
I guess your sis a little more melty and stuff, though
>>698710
Your name is Regal?
No.698712
>>698710
yeah ya scapegoat
>>698708
come on how can you beat Nero with that!?
No.698713
File: 1448245648479.jpg (922.74 KB, 800x1068, 200:267, 686679f147e3e188a55694c6ec….jpg)
>>698709
>stuffs a silencing talisman down his mouth
Shut up! You're just spreading lies!
>>698708
You're real ambitious, Red.
>>698711
That was an extremely bossy thing to say.
No.698714
>>698711
I have mouth and he didn't, thanks for being racist
>>698713
>rips out his own throat making it fall out
HRGLBFRGGF!
>and he's leaking stuff everywhere
No.698715
>>698710
Everything and anything.
>>698711
That sounds like nerd central!
>>698712
I will because I'm amazing!
>>698713
Come on, we have work to do!
>grabs all the tails
>drags the foxbabe away
No.698716
File: 1448245833346.jpg (71.98 KB, 500x707, 500:707, tumblr_nrq7rtuoIA1s41wxzo1….jpg)
>>698711
As if the Kazikli Voivode would give his name to a foolish peasant.
>
...Then again, a fool never taught is a fool that never learns. I am Vlad III, the Lord Impaler.
>>698712
She seems to be a good enough matriarch.
No.698717
>>698716
>>698715
>still spewing things out of his throat
GGRRAABBLLLHHHRRRRRKKK!!!
No.698718
File: 1448246156708.jpg (413.48 KB, 712x1020, 178:255, tumblr_nenbsbQwm11r28jawo1….jpg)
>>698713
No way, I would never be ironic like that~
>>698714
I couldn't tell if he did, I withhold judgment until I know the facts!
>>698715
Zaun is a city covered in pollution and noxious fumes where the poor and orphaned are used as subjects for experiments by the rich and greedy.
>>698716
So that's where the whole pike thing came from!
You must be pretty good at what you do~
No.698719
>>698715
Did she just... she has no idea how to do anything, does she.
It's not like Nero is wife material either, but...
>>698717
Ohh, a wedding ring.
>picks it out of the goop
>>698718
A sycophant, then. Appeasing the ego won't help you. I killed my own Boyars for that. Worthless sows with undeserved privileges suckling the teat of my Wallachia.
No.698720
>>698719
>throat heals up
....that's not even mine?
>>698718
you don't even know what my face really looks like!
No.698721
>>698719
What should I do, then?
No.698722
>>698720
Maybe you ate someone.
>>698721
Try stopping to think before you open your mouth. You'll find it useful.
No.698723
>>698722
that is a possibility
No.698724
>>698720
I didn't think you were wearing a suit, and your face matches the rest of your body, so what else could there be?
>>698722
But that's what I do!
No.698725
>>698723
It's not entirely new, too.
>>698724
As the young people say now, "guess you've got brain problems!"
No.698726
>>698724
THIS!
>>698725
you keeping the ring?
No.698727
>>698725
Or I just decided that I wanted to play around a bit.
>>698726
Oh wow
how do you even fit in there without ripping your jaw off when you do things like this >>698714
No.698728
File: 1448247294449.jpg (98.58 KB, 408x409, 408:409, 2627725-mcarnage_a_thegrou….jpg)
>>698727
glade ya asked.....I'm not telling you but I'm glade ya asked
No.698729
>>698726
No, are you?
>>698727
Do you know what we did with the mentally ill in my day?
I'll give you a hint. I'm famous for it.
No.698730
>>698729
sure I pawn off stuff I puke out
No.698731
File: 1448247654131.jpg (224.96 KB, 380x615, 76:123, tumblr_ned6gongFv1s0adc8o1….jpg)
>>698728
Now you're just teasing me!
>>698729
well I'd say I'm pretty sane
maybe the guy who is famous for impaling people is a little more off his rocker~
No.698732
>>698731
and I'm enjoying it too
No.698733
>>698730
That's actually...frugal.
>>698731
You mean to tell me defending my kingdom was insane?
You disgust me with your vapid responses.
No.698734
File: 1448248063514.jpg (248.79 KB, 800x1155, 160:231, janna_poster_art_by_artger….jpg)
>>698732
That's not even fair!
>>698733
At least you don't experiment on orphans, you do have that going for you.
No.698735
>>698734
I'm not a fair person
>>698733
pays more then ya think
No.698736
>>698734
The only ones violating orphans were the Ottomans who I fought tooth and nail to push out of Wallachia.
>>698735
Maybe I should loot the corpses of my foes...
No.698737
>>698735
You really are a good supervillan
>>698736
hm, that makes you good in my book.
I may have misjudged you, beardman
No.698738
>>698736
you so should man
>>698737
I am the best!
No.698739
>>698737
History is skewed. Western Europeans were afraid of my ferocity and cast me as a demon in their stories.
The Baltic states know the truth.
>>698738
Well, I know an easy way to refill my coffers now.
No.698740
>>698738
welll
Thaaaaaat might be a stretch!
>>698739
The western europeans are pretty boring and gross in comparison
No.698741
>>698740
I'm better then you at it!
>>698739
it pays for there own pikes!
No.698742
File: 1448249218998.jpg (376.53 KB, 700x993, 700:993, 1520c1aa3e63a37b7d3c97f03f….jpg)
>>698740
The only good one was King Arthur.
>>698741
I generate the pikes inside my body.
No.698743
>>698741
of course, I'm a good guy.
No.698744
>>698742
.....I need to start doing that
>>698743
eeeeeehhhhh
No.698745
>>698742
And it is questionable if it even exists
>>698744
how am I bad?!
No.698746
>>698745
well I mean ya bad at being good for one
No.698747
>>698744
It's genius.
>>698745
You must not understand. We're Heroic Spirits. Of course he exists.
No.698748
>>698746
I'm just light-hearted in here~
>>698747
I'm not sure if I'll be able to understand, so I trust you.
No.698749
>>698748
eeeeeeehhhhhh
>>698747
it really is
No.698750
>>698748
I'll leave it at that.
>>698749
Convenient too. I could make them come from the floor underneath people, or I could shoot them out from my body at them.
Options are always nice.
No.698751
>>698750
....you could be a colon doctor!
No.698752
>Looks into the room.
>Sees that nothing interesting is going on.
>Debates if I should stay or leave.
No.698753
That Mashu's got a damn good poker face.
No.698754
>>698753
>Stares at.
>This is something you don't see everyday.
Hmm.
No.698755
File: 1448255897869.png (480.72 KB, 461x700, 461:700, 416588446cb673a84d0ba70822….png)
>>698754
>...
>staring right back
>...
Ah fuck it!
>tears it all off
At least this is less embarrassing.
>standing in the buff
No.698757
File: 1448256048398.png (576.18 KB, 500x758, 250:379, 8f0e19d44725d5f28de5fedb06….png)
No.698758
File: 1448256130572.jpg (827.69 KB, 707x1000, 707:1000, tumblr_nm17sfFef91sajagpo1….jpg)
>>698757
>clomp
>clomp
>clomp
No.698759
>>698758
>hackles rising
I'm all for a good showdown but couldya wait I find me some pants or something?
No.698761
>>698755
>Looks down at your manhood then back at your face.
So you're the type that does not mind showing his manhood to others. It actually makes me almost wonder how you would be on a date.
No.698762
>>698760
Righto then.
>slipping into his tights
>>698761
I was on a date, girly. It's only natural for dates to end outside of one's clothes.
No.698763
>>698762
And your date ended with you in a dress?
No.698764
>>698763
Well, that was actually something else. Think of it like a hook up. Or at least me trying to get one.
No.698765
>>698764
I am guessing you did not succeed in hooking up. What even is hooking up? It sounds really painful.
No.698766
>>698765
It's a bit like-
>
No.698767
>>698766
>An jealous aura surrounds me as I bite my nail.
Grrrr...... so that what it means.
No.698768
>two Metal Gears missing
>things ramping up in Syria
>Master Miller is some kind of closet weeaboo
>Balalaika's sister is Sniper Wolf
>Sniper Wolf is alive
Jeez...
No.698769
>>698767
What's all this then?
>dragging his finger through the air
>leaving a green trail
No.698770
File: 1448258398116.png (187.86 KB, 487x208, 487:208, parsee_mizuhashi_smudge__b….png)
>>698769
Grrr...
>Blinks calming down a little bit.
My jealousy or you can say my power.
>>698768
Hm?
No.698771
Are we hooking up in here?
No.698773
>>698772
I heard someone was talking about hooking up so I came to check it out
No.698774
File: 1448258573690.jpg (649.19 KB, 793x1000, 793:1000, 3b4e5d25b2601d04b6c5acbadc….jpg)
>>698770
You got powers?
>>698771
Kind of the opposite.
No.698775
File: 1448258627881.jpg (117.11 KB, 500x708, 125:177, tumblr_ltjjycUakF1qb772zo1….jpg)
No.698776
>>698774
Yes I do and I presume that you have powers as well.
No.698777
>>698774
Lame!
>>698775
>headpats
Hey, Parsee
No.698778
>>698773
...Right.
I would think the first line of reasoning would be to wonder how we got to this Nowhere place.
No.698779
>>698776
Just magic.
>twiddles his fingers
>sparkles flying around
>>698777
I've just been dealt a harsh blow, girly. A man needs some time to recover from a resounding defeat.
No.698780
>>698777
>B
Attempts to bite your hand.
Grrrrr
No.698781
>>698779
Just break her fingers next time, that'll be sure to work.
No.698782
>>698778
I decided to just not question it
I was getting tired of the beach, anyway
>>698779
oh pucker up!
you can't let one defeat bring you down!
>>698780
>more headpats
smile for me~
No.698783
>>698782
>sometimes I forget these people are insane
The beach?
>
Never mind, I won't find anything here.
>snek away
No.698784
>>698781
Break Mashu's fingers? You're a pretty heartless guy.
>>698782
Don't worry about me, I'll bounce back!
No.698785
>>698779
>Snakes her fingers and her aura began to twist and turn until it formed a green dragon.
Can you do this?
>>698782
No.
No.698786
File: 1448259126146.jpg (448.17 KB, 1280x1811, 1280:1811, tumblr_mtc6j6fX3F1s0adc8o1….jpg)
>>698783
Hey, don't just leave like that!
I wasn't done with you!
No.698787
>>698785
why not?
last night was so cozy!
No.698788
>>698784
And history repeats itself, doesn't it?
Maybe you should invest in a time-traveling car before the second date, just to be safe.
No.698789
File: 1448259306552.jpg (49.43 KB, 600x851, 600:851, touhou_-_mizuhashi_parsee.….jpg)
>>698787
Shut up! I wasn't feeling well last night yet you took advantage of that. You're no better than the humans that took advantage of me in the past.
No.698790
>>698784
I'll be very disappointed if you don't!
>>698789
How did I take advantage of you?
You could have blown holes through me with those orbs of yours whenever you wanted.
No.698791
>>698785
Whoaho! Nothing that impressive.
>>698788
I'm not that much of a flop, man.
No.698792
File: 1448259540491.png (562.37 KB, 780x1083, 260:361, 4d84c5900ebeb5cb9eaa93dd26….png)
>>698791
Just trying to make conversation.
Have you tried the direct approach? It's not like the she's the type to be easily violated, right?
No.698793
File: 1448259872374.jpg (423.23 KB, 900x1256, 225:314, 602cb7314c4c3229f85e849fa1….jpg)
>>698792
That's the easy approach. Stealing dango is one thing, but getting her to want to give me the dango is where it's at.
No.698794
>>698790
Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! I despise you.
>>698791
That's a shame.
>The dragon wrapped itself around Parsee before dispersing into a thousand cherry blossom peddles.
No.698795
>>698793
You could always just make your own dango, eh?
Except I think that would mean complicated surgery, so...
Artemis might know something, she's the dango queen after all. Though your Teach wasn't half bad if I remember rightly.
>>698794
Fancy!
No.698796
File: 1448260308314.jpg (621.42 KB, 1062x1686, 177:281, 0176c99930bede4d7473d1b608….jpg)
>>698794
>choking on a petal
Ack!
>coughs it up
So what, is it just a pretty little decoration?
>>698795
Artemis does make some pretty good dango. And I do wonder if Teach knows how to-
>!
Wait wait wait, why the hell am I talking about making dango! You completely missed the metaphor!
No.698797
>>698796
>The petal you coughed up was covered in your blood.
Oh I forgot to tell you that each petal are basically miniature blades. Have fun trying to avoid them.
>The petals seemed to follow wherever the wind would take them.
>>698795
What is?
No.698798
File: 1448260612426.jpg (587.23 KB, 1200x1109, 1200:1109, 53657865_p7_master1200.jpg)
>>698796
I missed the metaphor?
>holds his hands out in front of his chest
When I said dango queen, I meant dango queen, mate.
>>698797
So where the windchimes? And nobody cut a poor guy up with a katana before waiting a few seconds for him to fall over, what gives?
No.698799
File: 1448260797711.jpg (367.46 KB, 1000x707, 1000:707, bae63aaaf4a1ccec174f6f4cdf….jpg)
>>698797
>Personal Skill: Protection from Arrows
>swaying left and right dodging through all of them
That's kinda crazy. What the hell would you need this for?
>>698798
>squint
I think I've been bamboozled.
>swigs a bottle
Ah, much better.
No.698800
File: 1448260804152.png (172.25 KB, 511x304, 511:304, The robots are watching yo….png)
>beep boop, son
>beep boop
No.698801
>>698794
>picks you up
That's not allowed
No.698802
>>698798
I would not have the slightest idea what you're talking about but if your referring to me hurting the naked man I can then assure you that it was not intentional.
>>698799
For protection and for a game that I love to play with the people that I live with.
No.698803
>>698801
Put me down this instant!
No.698804
>>698803
Not until you talk that back!
No.698805
No.698806
>>698799
Who, me?
And I thought I was such a nice guy too, who knew?
>>698802
Now that's the most depressing thing I've heard all day.
No.698807
File: 1448261221671.png (512.97 KB, 465x670, 93:134, 319b7aa7fee48184607510c3a0….png)
>>698800
Yo.
>>698802
What kind of game involves razor petals?
No.698808
>>698806
You? A nice guy? Come on man you're worse than I am!
No.698810
>>698807
Danmaku.
>>698806
How is that depression?
>>698804
>Places my hand on your chest.
Put me down.
I apologize for the simple grammatical errors I am making when I am typing. It's currently 2 in the morning.
No.698811
>>698807
Hello!
>looking around
I'm... not quite sure how I ended up here.
>>698809
>blink
Er... can I help you?
No.698812
>>698808
Keep those compliments up and I'm bound to get a swelled head.
But as much as I love avoiding talking about me, we're getting away from the issue at hand here, aren't we.
>>698810
Well when a man and his psychologist love each other very much...
No.698813
File: 1448261773065.png (895.24 KB, 800x1132, 200:283, forecast_janna_finished_by….png)
>>698810
>holds you tighter
Nope, not until you say that you don't hate me!
I'm in the same boat
>>698811
You're shiny
I think I see why Ahri likes you so much
No.698814
>>698810
That sounds way too innocent.
>>698811
I don't think any of us do, little guy.
>>698812
Mashu's dango? Hmm...
>chin rub
I think I'm better off going after a different target.
No.698815
>>698812
Are you implying that I am in love that guy?!
>Points to the naked man with my free hand.
No.698817
>>698814
That's the spirit! Quit when things get hard, that's what I always say.
Do I say always say that? Maybe I should keep a log book.
>>698815
Noooooo no no no no no
>>698816
He has pants!
No.698818
>>698817
If you really wanna see me with Mashu that bad go talk to one of those Caster guys. Gotta be opportunistic about this.
No.698819
>>698816
that barely counts!
No.698820
>>698813
I'd hope being shiny isn't the only reason people like me.
>>698814
That's rather worrying. Of course, there's always the possibly that I'm just being paranoid.
No.698821
>>698818
Now you're just implying I don't have anything better to do all day, and you'd be right!
I should at least be more deserving of standard NPC lines like that.
No.698822
>>698816
Naked!
>>698817
Are you sure?!
>>698813
>The hand that was on your chest began to glow green, burning through your clothing slowly.
Any last words before I rip your heart out?
>>698814
It's a fun game of shooting magical spells at each other until the other one is bleeding on the ground.
No.698823
>>698820
>nods
It is a major factor
>>698822
I'll miss you.
No.698824
File: 1448262479865.png (576.18 KB, 500x758, 250:379, 8f0e19d44725d5f28de5fedb06….png)
>>698819
What about it doesn't count?
>>698820
Everyone's all here in the same place, so what's the difference?
>>698821
You sit in a tree all day. You don't even deserve lines.
>>698822
Topless ain't naked! In fact, I encourage it!
No.698825
>>698822
I'm sure, kid. It's nothin' personnel.
>>698824
Words of truth! And I'm still the best friend you got, how about that?
>
Nah, maybe you're right. I should associate myself with a better crowd or something. I have an image to protect!
No.698826
>>698824
It's just like those girls nowadays that exercise in sports bras and those tiny pants and say "I'm not naked tho!" You're basically naked.
I'm not complaining, though.
No.698827
>>698823
>I removed my hand from your chest after burning through your shirt and bra, then I clenched my hand, making a fist.
Grrrrr.
>>698824
It does count!
>>698825
None taken.
No.698828
File: 1448263062221.png (529.67 KB, 500x716, 125:179, 55c46ac8579d3f30353a8edc15….png)
>>698825
Of those two statements, none of them are correct.
>>698826
Damn right you're not complaining.
>flexan
>>698827
Well then call me a nudist.
No.698829
>>698823
I suppose so. It's not uncommon for organic lifeforms to be drawn to shiny objects.
>>698824
There is no difference, really. But if we all were brought to the same place, Earth is most likely experiencing some form of anomaly.
>Clank no stop speaking in nerd language
No.698830
>>698827
I think I love this job.
>>698828
So you're saying I'm not completely wrong.
No.698831
File: 1448263224664.jpg (696.1 KB, 1159x1500, 1159:1500, tumblr_mng9idoR2c1qj0nqpo1….jpg)
>>698827
>looks down, cleavage exposed
Looks like I'm the naked one now.
>holds you a little higher so she is looking at you in the eyes
Now what do you say, Parsee?
>>698828
>her chest is now exposed
Yeah, could be worse
>>698829
Do robotos not like being shiny also?
No.698832
>>698830
Would that job be a hero?
>>698828
Hello nudist.
>>698831
Grrrrr
>Leans in and then locks lips with yours for a second then pulls away.
Hmph I am not sorry one bit! Now let me down!
No.698833
>>698829
What?
>>698830
No, no I'm saying you Archers need to find some friends.
>>698831
>finger guns
Now you're getting in the spirit. Now there's only one step left.
No.698834
>>698832
Something like that.
>
Man, I had money riding on that one too. I thought we'd get another three months of passive-aggressive sexual tension out of this one.
>>698833
It's like you've never met any of the other guys.
No.698835
>>698832
>giggles
there you go~
>sits you down next to the weird ginger guy
>>698833
>jiggle
I think there are lots more steps to come
No.698836
File: 1448263556875.jpg (242.89 KB, 1400x901, 1400:901, sample-7cb743fed0d94bb100e….jpg)
>Blasts through the wall
>ACDC Back in Black playing in the background
No.698837
File: 1448263621995.gif (504.04 KB, 245x248, 245:248, It appears we have a probl….gif)
>>698831
Of course. Being shiny is like being clean to a robot.
>>698833
>blink
>blink
>time to tone down the smarts
If we all keep getting dragged to different places with no explanation, that may be a sign that something's wrong.
No.698838
>>698836
>black and yellow black and yellow
What have I told you about blowing holes in the wall?
>>698837
Some people like to be a little dirty, though
Could be the same for some robots.
No.698839
File: 1448263806300.jpg (148.44 KB, 711x773, 711:773, 655794-parsee_mizuhashi_71.jpg)
>>698834
She wouldn't let me down.
>Spits on the floor.
It tasted terrible.
>>698835
Don't ever do that again!
No.698840
>>698832
And proud!
>>698834
Spike the red guy's drink. He's a total lightweight.
>>698835
Well if you'll care to follow me take about twenty steps to your right and through that door, you'll fid that the party's only just getting started.
>>698837
Sailing upon the winds of destiny, Clank!
No.698842
>>698838
>Black and Yellow? Dafuq out of here with that shit.
Oh I'm sorry, it seems we haven't met~
>Her eyes glowing a violent red
No.698843
>>698835
Well helloooo nurse.
>>698839
I think I'm starting to understand now.
Yes, yes, that must be it. I really am the only sane one here.
>>698840
All I've got is Taxine, that's basically the same as a roofie, right?
No.698844
>>698843
Sane? I am pretty sane when it's not the holidays. Oh, just so you no there will be no Christmas.
>>698840
Disgusting.
No.698845
>>698838
You have a point. Personally, I'd rather stay clean.
>>698840
I... do not understand. Are you implying something's destined to go wrong?
No.698846
File: 1448264145843.jpg (248.79 KB, 800x1155, 160:231, janna_poster_art_by_artger….jpg)
>>698839
But you were so cute, honey!
>>698840
>goes to get her jacket, putting it on
Oh? Your first step wasn't covering up?~
>>698842
>yellow is almost gold
>right?
>Right?!
>blinks
Are you sure?
>>698843
>Smiles
I am no nurse, but I can do some healing in a pinch
>wink
No.698847
>>698846
What do you want Janna my patience is limited today~ And I haven't eaten, I am a bit hungry..
No.698848
>>698843
>...
>...
On the plus side, you might be able to score with a hot nurse after.
>>698844
You're not complaining about your girlfriend.
>>698845
"Wrong" might not be the right word.
>>698846
I think we're thinking of different steps, girly.
>wink
No.698849
>>698846
I am no ones honey and I am not cute!
>>698848
She's not my girlfriend.
No.698850
File: 1448264538037.jpg (442.52 KB, 1037x1200, 1037:1200, 53507002_p3_master1200.jpg)
>>698844
No Christmas? That's terrible! Somebody should really do something about that!
>...
>whistles
>>698846
You mean you're not even licensed? Do you have any idea of the kind of fines that would mean?
I, however, am a registered medical lawyer. If you would just care to follow me into my office here...
>>698848
"After"?
I'm nobody's sloppy seconds except for fate's, bub.
No.698851
>>698847
>waves
Just saying hi~
>>698848
I think that may have been by design
>smirks
>>698849
You are both of those things
Just accept it~
>>698850
If you want to do some paperwork, let's do it right here and now
No.698852
>>698848
Then what word would you use?
No.698853
>>698851
I see, you sure your little green grinch won't get her panties in a wad with you speaking like that to me hmmm??
>Fades out and reappears walking out the kitchen with a glass of wine
No.698854
>voip
Sure is noisy out-
Oh god why are all these people here.
No.698855
>>698849
Oh yeah? Then what do you call it?
>>698850
Well I ain't sharin'.
>>698851
Please, just hear me out on this one. I'm sure you'll just love the interior decor.
>>698852
It's just "different".
No.698856
File: 1448264980440.jpg (366.71 KB, 902x1280, 451:640, fafef32e2c663cd7c7e163943a….jpg)
>>698850
No Christmas ever again!
>>698851
Grrrrr I am not! Just stay naked for eternity so you can freeze to death!
No.698857
>>698854
I'm still trying to figure that out.
>>698855
...Somehow, that makes it seem worse.
No.698858
>>698851
And that's the kind of attitude that'll get you far in this business.
I'd ask to see your transcripts but I'm pretty sure I know how you got all those A's.
>>698855
Them sounds like fighting words, chappie.
Please tell me they're not, I bruise easy.
>>698856
I SAID, SOMEBODY SHOULD REALLY DO SOMETHING ABOUT THAT
No.698859
>>698855
Anything but a girlfriend.
No.698860
File: 1448265178016.png (388.39 KB, 450x751, 450:751, tumblr_n0pfn803tX1s5evqyo1….png)
>>698857
Well it couldn't have been me!
>
Most likely wasn't me.
>
...Probably wasn't me?
No.698861
File: 1448265259082.png (284.69 KB, 850x1200, 17:24, tumblr_mttdbwxCYt1rna804o1….png)
>>698853
We're just talking!
>blinks as you disappear
Hey, you better have gotten some of that for me!
>>698855
Is there a comfy couch?
>>698856
You'd come and save me just before I slip from the brink of death!
>>698858
Oh yeah, I put all of myself into my studies
No.698862
>>698857
Come on, don't be a square about this. Change is good!
>>698858
You're asking me to give up this catch for you, huh?
>>698859
Lover. I see.
>>698861
Of course. It's perfect. Cozy, space for two.
No.698863
>>698858
No! I like no Christmas!
>>698861
No.
No.698865
>>698860
Hm? What would you have to do with this?
>>698862
Sometimes, yes. It all depends on what is changing.
No.698866
>>698854
>Obviously checking you out with her spoop eye
>Oh new blood?
>Creepy smile is creepy
>>698861
Keep her close, it would be a shame if she tripped and fell onto a gun of sorts.
>300% dead stare, then smiles
But I digress.
>
Oh this? It's not that you think it is. If you want, I'll be making more of this real soon if you want to see how I wring it out.
No.698867
>>698862
>comes closer and pokes your abs
hmmmm, I think I'll pass on this one~
>>698863
Yeah!
You're setting this up to be a romantic tragedy!
No.698868
>>698861
I'm sure we can find a sizable workload for you to get started on.
>
I mean, not too big, it'd scare off too many potential applicants, you know?
This totally isn't rationalization, nope.
>>698862
Well you gave up all those other kinds of catches to the shark-octopus thing, so I thought...
>>698863
But presents!
No.698869
No.698870
>>698865
Localized time manipulation.
You know, freaky high school superhero stuff.
>>698866
>uh
>UH
No.698871
>>698864
No need to be a prude! We're all open here.
>>698865
Well, everyone's still the same.
>>698867
>snakes an arm around her waist
I've got an offer you simply can't refuse.
>>698868
I give the fish I catch to the Sharktopus. The birds I catch, I keep for myself.
No.698872
File: 1448265809844.png (Spoiler Image, 744.74 KB, 1128x1600, 141:200, 1447371493053.png)
>>698867
Good, I wouldn't have to see you then. Now where is the pool that I was promised?
No.698873
File: 1448265875410.jpg (4.5 MB, 2480x3507, 2480:3507, kurumi_tokisaki___melancho….jpg)
>>698870
>Oh she's older..
>Sigh
>.. and of no use to me.
>Slightly upset pout
No.698874
>>698868
That no one needs.
>>698871
S-shut up!
No.698875
>>698870
Interesting. I have some experience with time manipulation as well.
>>698871
I suppose you're right. I'm most likely just worrying too much.
No.698876
File: 1448266061070.jpg (43.54 KB, 283x301, 283:301, tumblr_nw18kczX6B1two7n9o2….jpg)
>>698873
Can I...help you?
>>698875
I mean I guess that makes me feel a little better, but seriously if this is your fault just go ahead and tell me already.
No.698877
>>698871
Have you tried arrows? Remarkably more efficient than garish Hawaiian shirts.
>>698874
Listen here, missy. I'm probably a closet masochist but hearing somebody bash presents is a kind of abuse I won't suffer.
No.698878
>>698868
I mean, if it gets too big it is just impractical
At a point you start to have diminishing returns.
>>698871
>a gust of wind blows your hand away
I don't know, can't is a strong word~
Run any further propositions by my new lawyer
>points at >>698868
>>698872
>suddenly large tornado outside
>digs a sizeable hole
>quick rainstorm fills it up
>a board falls from a nearby building and hangs over the new pool
Right over there!
And there is even a diving board~
No.698879
File: 1448266154239.jpg (21.04 KB, 343x193, 343:193, Kurumi-Tokisaki-date-a-liv….jpg)
>>698876
Oh me, no, I am beyond help~
>Internally giggling
>Someone should bake new bread
No.698880
>>698866
I trust you to be careful with your guns~
>sighs
Now I want some boooze!
No.698883