No.721988
>Meanwhile, away from the swamp
No.721989
Pop.
>spletch
Anyone else?
>
No? Guess you work for me now. Unless, y'know, you wanna be like your friend here.
No.721990
>>721989
Someone's having fun.
No.721991
>>721990
Han. Here by chance or for the party.
No.721992
>>721991
I wouldn't pass up a good time, if it's fun.
Poison's startin' to bore me. "Don't kill'em, Han!" "We're running out of willing entries, Han!" "This is your fault, Han!"
Whatcha got for Auntie Spider.
No.721993
>>721992
Oh I got a job for someone like you.
You see any piece of human garbage wearing a black skull mask or helmet, smash their head in.
Nobody muscles in on my territory.
No.721994
>>721993
Yeah? That it?
>grins maliciously
Poor bastards better entertain me, for your sake.
No.721995
>>721994
Plenty of teeth to shatter to get your kicks, Han.
No.721996
>>721995
Smooth talker and man of few words rolled in one, huh.
Talk's cheap. Point the way, Darth.
No.721997
>>721996
Always liked Han Solo more than Vader.
>ahem
You've got sharp eyes. Take a look around. They're easy enough to spot. Fancy suits and dumb masks.
No.721998
>>721997
So more dorks in stupid costumes. Least I get to kill'em.
I'm gonna bill ya if it ain't fun.
No.721999
>>721998
Lucky for both of us that smashing'em's a genuine pleasure.
No.722000
File: 1451933085992.gif (216.24 KB, 1257x1920, 419:640, tumblr_nsduvp2SrC1reo4gbo1….gif)
>>721999
You ever get to the point where smashing assholes is boring 'cause they're too squishy, but everyone else is too strong?
Fuckin' cape bullshit, heroes are stupid.
No.722001
>>722000
Welcome to the background radiation of my life, Han.
This is why I'm back to square one.
No.722002
>>722001
It fuckin' sucks, Hood.
No.722003
>>722002
Sure does.
Know what sucks more? Everyone's fucking bulletproof or is a master of some bullshit martial art.
Which is totally hypocritical coming from me but come on. When everyone's doing it, nobody's doing it.
No.722004
>>722003
Watched Incredibles too much.
>
I'm gonna get a headstart on this kickfest, been too long since Red took me out for a monster mash.
>flips away
No.722005
>>722004
Roman, you poor bastard.
Fisk's next.
No.722006
>screeeeeeeeeeech
>"W-Who the hell is this guy!?"
Name's Solomon Grundy. Like one of those old white dudes you learn about in history, 'cept for gangsters exclusively.
Unlike the others like him, though, he didn't crawl away and die like a good boy.
>grenade bandoleer is go
>"Wait-What the fuck are you doing!"
Relax, baby. I'm with the band
>
No.722007
File: 1451945599457.gif (737.67 KB, 498x281, 498:281, stop asking me for money d….gif)
>decimating some muggers
I DON'T HAVE ANY MONEY YOU MORONS!
No.722008
Huh. They're all dead....they won't be needing these wallets.
>starts taking wallets off bodies
No.722010
>>722009
>pulling money out
>throwing the wallet down
What?
No.722011
>>722010
Can you please refrain from taking their money? Sure they did try to steal from you but two wrong do not make it right.
No.722012
>>722011
They challenged me. I won. This is spoils of victory.
No.722013
>>722012
They were desperate for money. If they knew you were not normal then they would of never challenged you.
No.722014
File: 1451951755184.png (918.03 KB, 1869x3156, 623:1052, bardock_by_bardocksonic-d6….png)
>>722013
Sounds like they're problem. Plus,
>holds up a wad of cash
They don't appear to have really been that desperate
No.722015
>>722014
>Ugh.
Drug addicts.
No.722016
>>722015
Not my problem. If someone's going to be stupid enough to challenge someone without knowing how strong they are, then they get what they got coming to them. Not my fault they're weaklings.
No.722017
>blam
Another one bites the dust, ba-dum dum dum dum dum.
No.722019
>>722017
>Throws a knife toward you as a reaction to you shooting.
>>722016
>Sighs.
Very well, can you at least dispose of the bodies since we are in the city.
No.722020
File: 1451952844356.png (1.37 MB, 2810x2425, 562:485, dragon_ball_z___bardock_by….png)
>>722019
Trash pick up is a city problem. And last I checked, I wasn't the city.
No.722021
>>722019
>
>knife: caught
>faux Arnold Schwarzenegger voice
>haha helmet voice changer
Don't do dat.
No.722022
>pulling crescent darts out of dead bodies
>Feels good to get back to basics, doesn't it?
It would, but you keep talking.
>Ouch. Somebody woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning.
I never went to sleep.
>That's the joke.
No.722023
>>722021
My apologies Jay. I am still a little jumpy after getting shot.
>>722020
Great, I just hope that the SWAT doesn't come again.
No.722024
>>722022
See? Easy fuckin' peasy.
>where the fuck did he get a minigun
>>722023
Don't. Call me that. In the fucking streets. When I have my goddamn helmet on.
It's Red Hood.
No.722026
>>722024
Hm? Right. Apologies Hood.
>>722025
Just the law that's here. They're quite annoying.
No.722027
>>722024
...Have you been carrying that around the whole time?
No.722028
>>722026
Swear to god you do this on purpose.
>>722027
I'm smuggling a LAW rocket launcher too.
No.722029
>>722028
A rocket launcher? How the fuck are you able to hide something like that?
No.722030
>>722029
LAWs are easy to hide, smaller'n a duffelbag.
Single-use though. Gotta throw the launcher tube away.
>
It's under my jacket, strapped to my back, to answer your question.
No.722031
>>722028
No, it was just a honest mistake and if I wanted to piss you off on purpose I would still be calling your name.
No.722032
>>722030
Okay, but why'd you bring it? I doubt we'll need to use a rocket on ordinary thugs.
No.722033
>>722031
You'd also be kinda re-dead.
My patience is very limited now. Don't tread on me.
>>722032
Why wouldn't I bring it? Might need to collapse a roof or blow a hole in a wall.
Utility, Moonman. S'why I spent so much on these convertible guns.
No.722034
>>722033
Fair enough. But I think you should know I've had explosive crescent darts with me the whole time.
No.722035
>>722033
Which is something I would really like to avoid for now.
No.722036
>>722034
I got exploding spikes for wall-breaching too.
Y'never know, Mooninite. Y'never know.
This one time in Star City I ran into Brick. Basically like The Thing.
Had to jam a small rocket through that rocky hide of his to get'im to work with me to fuck with Green Arrow.
Never a bad idea to pack extra heat.
>>722035
Good girl.
>
Duck.
No.722037
>>722026
If they're just earthlings, then I bet I can take em.
I mean, if they'll let Krillin join then the law must be a joke here.
No.722038
>>722036
Well, now I just feel unprepared.
>smirks
But I'll manage.
No.722040
>>722036
>I kneel down as you pointed your weapon at me, a scarlet magical circle was formed behind you.
No.722041
>>722038
'Course you will, you're Moon Knight.
>>722040
>BANG
Pretty little maid out in the streets at night, you're gonna be a sucker for attention.
Another piece of trash joins the pile.
No.722042
>>722041
So, how many people have we killed? I lost count.
No.722043
>>722041
>Stands up and dust off my skirt.
These were the only casual clothing I could find which suit me.
>
Thank you for helping me.
No.722044
>>722042
Does it matter? It'll never be enough.
That utopia I saw, the world I lived in for all of a day, there was still crime. Just no supervillains. No Legions of Doom, no Injustice League, no rogues gallery.
Just simple and clean gutter trash to clean up every night.
This is just a longterm gig we're doing to amass a good enough position from which we kill every supervillain on the planet.
>>722043
I don't deserve thanks.
No.722045
>>722044
You mean you weren't keeping score?
>chuckles
You're right, though. We've still got a lot of work to do.
No.722047
>>722045
Would you count ants you burn with a magnifying glass?
Smallfry are smallfry. It's the big fish that matter.
>grins behind his mask
We'll have a competition when we're ready.
Going to war with costumed freaks. Maybe I should see if Castle wants in on this.
No.722050
>>722044
Every person deserves a thank you when they helped someone.
No.722051
>>722047
You're kidding, right? Of course he will. He's the Punisher.
No.722055
>>722050
You said it yourself. Every "person".
I'm not a person anymore.
>>722051
Between you, me, Juri, Castle and maybe Revy, we should be set.
Maybe more of those kooks in Roanapur will be motivated by their almighty dollar to shed some blood for me.
No.722058
>>722055
Well, they're either getting a paycheck or an ass-kicking. I think it's safe to say they will.
No.722060
>>722057
Don't be stupid. I didn't save you, just killed another piece of trash that I was gonna kill anyways.
Your unlife was an afterthought.
>>722058
Fair 'nough. Though it won't be an ass-kicking. It'll be an execution.
No.722062
No.722066
>>722060
Right, right. Forgot that you're less forgiving than I am.
No.722068
>>722060
>Sighs
Then why did you tell me to duck instead of shooting through me? Surely something told you not to shoot through me to achieve your objective.
No.722071
>>722066
Mercy's wasted on them anyways. Everyone in that hellhole is like me. Hollow shell with no fear of dying.
>>722068
...Shut up.
>Jay has no counter-argument
>maybe still trying to be a hero
No.722073
>>722068
I wouldn't push him. He will shoot you if you push him.
No.722074
>>722071
I wouldn't call you a hollow shell, but alright.
No.722077
>>722073
Damn right I will.
You in on this shebang, Roy? I need you by my side.
>
No homo.
>>722074
You get the idea.
No.722080
>>722071
>He is a hero to me.
Very well, I won't press on.
>>722073
I have no intention to push him. I simply wanted to know why, but since he doesn't want to answer then I will respect his space.
No.722081
>>722077
Someone's gotta watch out for you. Make sure you don't take this shit too far.
No.722082
>>722077
Yeah, yeah. Doesn't mean you have to put yourself on their level.
No.722083
>>722080
Whatever.
Why're you smilin' at me, I don't get it.
>>722081
Funny, I have to watch out for you, make sure you don't accidentally light yourself on fire or do something crazy.
Guess neither of us can leave the other.
>>722082
I'll sink to whatever level I have to in order to get results, Moonman.
No.722085
>>722080
As the one person who truly knows how far you can push him until he shoots you, trust me. You were pushing.
>>722083
I blew myself up ONE time. I think we're at a greater risk of me setting you on fire by accident.
No.722086
>ORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORA
No.722088
>>722083
Just make sure you don't sink any lower than you have to, alright?
>>722086
>well
>that's a thing
No.722089
>>722085
I swear if you try and torch me in the shower again, your hat's going up your ass.
>>722086
>nice
>>722088
Gotcha.
No.722091
>>722086
>phone out
>camera on
>>722089
Jay please, if I wanted you torched in the shower, you'd be torched in the shower.
No.722092
>>722083
It's because I am happy and enjoying your company. It's not that hard to figure out why someone would smile.
>>722085
You've been shot by the Hood before?
>>722086
>It's her again.
No.722095
>>722088
>rolls off the bloody maid
>ow fuck my face
Wait a minute...
>nudges the face
>pained groaning
Huh. Wrong one.
>>722089
Duffel bag for you over on Broadway.
>>722091
>click
Gonna see to see some ID, partner.
>>722092
>ffffffffffffucking maids
No.722096
>>722089
>nod
We shouldn't have to do any more work than what's necessary. That's what the people underneath us are for.
>>722095
Took you that long to notice?
No.722097
File: 1451959657183.png (626.89 KB, 570x601, 570:601, Jay beats up 5 Speed Demon….png)
>>722091
Maybe. But you know I'd come back pissed.
>>722092
You can't be serious.
>>722095
Briefcase for you in the trunk of a black Impala parked across the street.
No.722099
>>722092
Once. On Accident. Well, we're calling it an accident.
>>722095
Don't really have one. Well, not a legitimate one at least. Having legit ID means you're in the system and being in the system is a hassle I just don't need.
>>722097
Would you? Or would you wake up in a crate built specifically to contain you when you woke up with a looping video of me mooning you?
No.722100
>>722097
Do I look like I am joking?
>
>>722095
>Not in my actual maid uniform right now.
Excuse me.
>>722099
What did you do?
No.722102
>>722096
Wanna make somethin' of it?
Way I see it, I did her a favor. World's fucked up enough to have maids that the poor bitches stuck sucking off a nameless rich dick aren't worth anything more.
>>722097
Pleasure doin' business and all that shit.
You got an alibi for the ginger or am I gonna paint the curb with his skull.
>>722099
The hell're you, some kinda fuckin' college student?
>>722100
What.
No.722103
>>722096
That's the general rule of being a boss, yeah. Lucky for me, you can fill the boss role and I can do the enforcer bits.
Only one of us actually owns a suit, after all.
>>722099
Only one who wants to see your hairy ginger ass is an alien living it out in Florida.
>>722100
I just don't get it. People aren't supposed to like me.
>>722102
Touch my ginger and the only skull being used as freeform art is yours.
Got a few more jobs for you if you're interested.
No.722104
>>722102
May I ask you a question? It'll only take a minute of your time.
>>722103
I am not most people. I find it admiral that you risk your life everyday.
No.722105
File: 1451960328308.png (500.89 KB, 527x800, 527:800, f12c829be5953d57dcc7325d0d….png)
>>722103
I ain't much to look at, but I'm no fuckin' whore either.
>
Fuck it, pathetic jerk off-fodder is whatever.
>rolls her shoulder
Fine. Got some info for sale too, if you're interested.
>>722104
Lemme make one thing clear.
I don't like maids. I never liked maids. I don't like you either.
My good mood is runnin' out like money in the hands of an addict. Get the picture?
>taps her wrist
Clock's ticking, amiga.
No.722106
>>722102
Uh-huh... I get the feeling you're the type of person who thinks the whole world is out to get them.
>>722103
>laughs
What, the Red Hood's never felt like dressing formally?
No.722107
>>722100
I dressed him a clown suit when he was passed out.
>>722102
College is for dipshits that can't teach themselves things.
I'm Arsenal. Former terrible sidekick turned pretty decent antihero.
>>722103
Actually, since the thing with the Xenos and the goop suit, my ass has been baby smooth.
No.722109
>>722104
What's to risk, death's just a slap on the wrist for me.
>>722105
Let's hear yours first.
>>722106
No?
>>722107
Didn't need to know that. Or remember the weird goopsuit thing.
No.722110
File: 1451960686152.jpg (417.99 KB, 850x1184, 425:592, sample_c166884688bb9d1cb1a….jpg)
>>722106
You're an even bigger dumbass than I thought if you don't think there's any fuckin' truth in that.
But the streets ain't much of a venue for any philosophical shit.
Woops.
>>722107
>
>
>
>acceptable
I ain't callin' you Arsenal, ya sound like a fuckin' Power Ranger.
Look like one too.
>>722109
Let's see the money first.
No.722111
>>722109
Remember when I had a kid and was friends with Red X?
>>722110
Then I suppose you can just call me Roy, Bootyshorts Woman.
No.722112
>>722105
>Ugh.
I just wanted to ask you if you heard about anyone putting a hit on me. Frankly I do not care if you don't like maids or not.
No.722113
>>722109
I don't really have a good reason for why I picked up the suit in the first place, to tell you the truth. It's a little harder to fight in than my normal costume. Restricts my movement more.
>>722110
If you're getting ready to tell me your sob story, save it. You're only here so we can add bodies to the pile faster.
No.722114
>>722110
>Impala pulls in
>trunk popped
>suitcase fulla dosh
So talk.
>>722111
I remember Lianne. Cute kid.
>Red X
>visibly shudders
Jesus Christ I thought I forgot that shitstain.
>>722113
I woke up in my fucking coffin in a suit. No utility belt, no tools to get out. Destroyed my hands to dig my way through the pine and dirt.
Don't like suits.
No.722116
>>722109
Well that may be true now but that was once not the case.
>>722107
Hm, that's something I just can't picture him wearing.
No.722117
File: 1451961209231.gif (973.63 KB, 500x392, 125:98, tumblr_nbrcujnlb61shbc9ho1….gif)
>>722111
Name's Revy. R-E-V-Y, not that fuckin' hard.
>>722112
And?
Why would I give a shit if somebody wanted your pretty little head on a platter?
>>722113
This from the fucker tryin' to instigate.
>>722114
That's for the bodies.
This is gonna cost ya.
No.722118
>>722114
>blink
...Maybe we should talk about something else, then.
>>722117
I'm not trying to do anything. I could drop a penny on the ground and you'd want to start an argument over it.
No.722119
>>722116
So fuckin' what? Past is past, present's now.
>>722117
I don't pay in advance for words.
Talk. Then we'll discuss pay.
>>722118
S'fine, Mooninite. I just don't wear'em.
No.722120
File: 1451961710284.png (1.17 MB, 804x1681, 804:1681, 20c1f7d4ef375ca8ae5df2e222….png)
>>722117
I would like to know if you heard anything. I am not asking you to protect me, Two Hands.
No.722121
File: 1451961718639.jpg (67.03 KB, 500x571, 500:571, tumblr_nj2ugrjja91rl3cy0o1….jpg)
>>722118
>
I get the feeling you don't like me too much.
Good.
>>722119
Fine, whatever. Just gotta check on somethin' first.
>hails down a passing street kid
'mere, kiddo. I'm gonna let you in on something if you go open that briefcase for me in the back of this dump here.
>Beretta under the tyke's face
And if try anything funny I'll put you back with the other zombies like you belong.
>kicks him away
>
Plugged some goons over on West 5th, block over from the docks. Lovely fuckin' city you got here, by the way.
Anyway, tried gettin' a bead on that Quinn chick you were talkin' about, ended up hearing some pretty juicy shit about some Two-Face fucker.
Word from Sis is you and him go way back.
No.722122
>>722114
SHE WAS ADORABLE!
Some days I get worried that I'm a terrible person because I'm not with her.
>>722116
We don't talk about it
>>722117
No its not. But I don't think we've ever met before.
No.722124
>>722119
Noted.
>So did we run out of people to shoot or something? Let's get this show back on the road!
>annoyed Moonman noises
>>722121
"Good?" Did you forget what usually happens to the people I don't like?
No.722125
>>722121
>doesn't even acknowledge the kid thing
Dent, huh... guy's not important. Just another lowlife mobster who's about to die.
>
Could be fun. Aight. Info's worth the cash. Keep talking.
>>722122
And paint a target on your homestead?
You can be a dad when you drop the costume.
>>722124
What's with the grunting.
No.722127
File: 1451962305883.png (72.78 KB, 500x293, 500:293, tumblr_namx6g1iCh1tu9bwyo1….png)
>>722120
I don't think you're hearin' me right.
Read my lips, "why the fuck should I care"
Now, if you were gonna buy any info offa me, s'adifferent story.
>>722122
Well whaddya fuckin' know, we just did.
Put 'er there.
>>722124
You forget I dunno who the fuck you are?
Keep your dick in your pants, man, I don't wanna see it.
>>722125
>gotta test for bombs, yo
Awright, scram.
>punts the squirt down the street
>counting them bills
Guess they're opening a new bridge or some shit on the other side of town. Bicentennial or whatever.
Fuck if I know why he'd be there, s'all I heard.
No.722129
>>722125
Her Mom's a super assassin and everyone I know is a cape.
>>722127
>firm, respectable handshake
Nice to meet you
No.722130
>>722119
The past is what made us who we are now. I am sorry.
No.722131
File: 1451962453309.png (682.84 KB, 670x468, 335:234, And then I have to reverse….png)
>>722125
Voice in my head's getting talkative again. Don't worry about it.
>>722127
Name's Moon Knight. Piss me off, you might have to work for us without your face attached.
No.722133
>>722127
He's gonna either blow it up or leave it alone, depends on his coin flip. Guy's a psycho.
>shrug
Guess I'll plug'im between the eyes. Can't hurt.
>>722129
Your best friend's a super assassin and an anti-villain.
>
That'd be me, by the way.
Capes don't make for good 'rents, y'know.
>>722130
Past doesn't matter, people change.
>>722131
So let's go shut'im up. Juri should be done turning Black Mask's goons inside out.
No.722135
File: 1451962746819.gif (881.69 KB, 500x453, 500:453, tumblr_nb0ag70V8u1shbc9ho1….gif)
>>722129
>manly shake in return
Pfft.
There a reason all you guys dress like total jerkoffs.
>>722131
>
>
>
You tryin' to be a boogeyman.
'Cause you sound like a fuckin' brat.
>>722133
>shrug
You want a 9mm in his head, you know where to find me.
So what's with these other jobs.
No.722137
>>722133
Depends on the cape. I bet Superman would be a pretty okay Dad.
>>722135
Because we're a bunch of well intentioned jerkoffs who do bad things for good reasons.
No.722139
>>722133
Alright. Just point me in the right direction and I'll get to work.
>>722135
You're one to talk. Just follow orders and keep your mouth shut, and we'll all go home happy.
No.722140
>>722135
>9mm
>laughing internally
Interception. Shipment of kryptonite coming in tonight at midnight. I want it.
Kill the armed escorts, hijack the crate, bring it to this location.
>card: given
>>722137
Flash too. The fast one, not the legless one.
>well-intentioned
>scoffs
Maybe you. I just wanna put dirtbags in the ground. S'what I do best.
>>722139
>arms extended
Look around you. This is why I picked the largest hive of scum and crime next to Roanapur.
No.722142
>>722137
"Well-intentioned"?
Now ain't that a fuckin' riot!
You guys are trash! Murdering trash!
Just a big ol' rinse cycle of trash murdering trash. Where's the moral, Aesop?
>>722139
I think I get the all-white shit now.
>snaps
You're a fuckin' Nazi
>>722140
All on my lonesome?
>snatches the card
Give a girl exactly what she wants too much, she'll think she's goddamn spoiled.
>flipping the card around
Where do I find the damn thing.
No.722144
>>722140
You wanna clean up the streets to prevent more kids from ending up like you. That shit is well meaning son.
>>722142
I only kill the really bad ones. And mostly as self defense. I don't really run out looking for scum to kill.
No.722145
>>722127
How much?
>>722133
Sometimes people change. Oh I've forgot to ask how you're feeling? Please forgive my rudeness.
No.722146
>>722140
Well, that makes things easier.
>SNIKT
>slice n' dice mode activated
>>722142
Good effort, but no. Try "avatar of the Egyptian moon god."
>urge to end his sentence with "bub": suppressed
>but damn these Wolverine claws are cool
No.722147
>>722142
There's this ancient invention, s'called a "map". Nowadays they come on paper and are city-based.
I'll let you figure out the particulars. You're resourceful.
>>722144
Streets are never gonna be clean, Harper. It's a cycle.
And I wouldn't have it any other way.
>>722145
Shhh. Daddy's busy.
>>722146
Welcome to the playground.
No.722149
File: 1451963958015.jpg (298.04 KB, 500x835, 100:167, 1325d54408e041e8e64fe5d912….jpg)
>>722144
Tough break, missing out on all the fun.
If all you're lookin' for is a good time and a few bruises, there're cheaper ways to do it, y'know.
>>722145
Make me an offer I can't refuse.
>>722146
So fuckin' what?
It's just a thing. Just a thing, and nothing more.
Thing nobody gives a shit aboutanymore either, but's obvious. I look like a terrorist to you?
>>722147
>bird: flipped
G'head an stick it up your ass, save me some time.
No.722150
>>722149
Seven gold emeralds.
No.722151
>>722147
Now all I have to do is decide is who to stab first.
>>722149
>Nobody gives a shit above me, huh? Now she's askin' for it.
>birdgod appears in front of Revy
>get spooked, son
Pretty sure ISIS members don't wear booty shorts, so no.
No.722152
File: 1451964351203.jpg (206.86 KB, 909x1080, 101:120, 4596195-img_20150531_15470….jpg)
>>722149
Cartography's not your strong suit, who knew?
>cheeky tone
>>722151
>
Have I ever told you how much I want to punch your bird?
No.722153
>>722150
>cha-CHING
Deal.
>>722151
>!
>instinct: shoot it
>a lot
>BANGBANGBANG
Maybe they fuckin' should! Get some, fuckin' cocksucker!
>>722152
Carto-what?
>guh
>[reload]
You really work with the fucking circus, huh.
Always hated circuses.
No.722154
>>722152
About two or three times, last I checked.
>>722153
>the bullets are doing two things: jack and shit
You done?
No.722155
>>722153
Fuck me, you really can't read a goddamn map?
>watching Rev shoot Khonshu
>smh tbqh fam
>tosses her a bigger gun
Nth metal bullets. They hurt shit that don't get hurt by lead.
>>722154
Well, I wanna punch your bird.
No.722156
>>722154
>but my bullets
>she no work
Fuckin' Dio de los Muertos in here.
>>722155
YOU WANNA DIE, JAY!?
>new gun caught anyway
>rrr
This shit won't fit in my holster.
No.722157
File: 1451965138298.jpg (491.54 KB, 709x1002, 709:1002, c056e15ff4b3944b18ad9ca0f4….jpg)
>>722153
The information.
>Holds my hand out.
>Seven gold emeralds get.
No.722158
>>722155
What's stopping you? Don't you still have some Nth metal brass knuckles lying around somewhere?
>>722156
Weren't you listening to Moon Knight? I'm an Egyptian god, not a Mexican one.
>Khonshu may or may not be staring at Revy's chest
>it's hard to tell when he doesn't have eyes
No.722159
>>722156
S'okay. Call it a rental. You like it, maybe I'll sell you some knuckledusters made out of it on the cheap.
>>722158
Oh yeah.
>
No.722160
File: 1451965528810.gif (1014.45 KB, 500x281, 500:281, tumblr_nldcrobk3O1qjsn9po1….gif)
>>722157
>yoink
I dunno dick from shit.
Caveat...cave-
Fuck it.
>>722158
>let him
Weren't you listening to the main man?
>Nth metal gun pointed at birdman
Say g'night, Gracie.
>bang
>>722159
>visibly excited
You better be at the fuckin' RZ!
>leaps awaaaaaaaaay
No.722161
>>722159
>Khonshu status: rekt
OW.
Ha! Nice.
>>722160
>and birdgod goes down
>along with Moonman
>MMM WHATCHA SAY
No.722162
>>722160
...She's almost cute.
Gonna suck if she bites it.
>>722161
Shit, Marc!
No.722163
>>722162
>doesn't look like he's getting back up, Jay
>uh-oh spaghettios
No.722164
>>722163
>SHIT
>MARC
Don't you fucking dare. Swear to god if I have to go down to Death's again...
No.722165
>being hit on by streetwalkers
>um
>um
...
>
No.722166
>>722163
>.....
Moon Knight get up.
No.722167
>being hit on by streetwakers
>
>
No.722168
>>722164
>Sailor Moon is kill
>no
>>722166
>he ain't getting up
No.722170
>>722167
>where did that bird come from
>why is it so confused
No.722171
>>722168
>[rages internally]
I'm gonna beat the fuck out of that bird.
>fireman carrying Moon Knight's body
>awaaaaay
No.722172
>>722170
>we just don't know
Eh?
>
Hello!
No.722175
>>722172
>Discernment of the Poor
Hello.
>holding five whores at arm's length
No.722178
>>722175
>Presence Detection
Ah, a Lancer! I'm a Lancer too.
>beaming
My name's Enkidu! What's yours?
>
Hey, people like you as much as they do me!
No.722182
>>722178
Karna.
>lightly waving pussyspear at the gaggle
Shoo now.
>Awwwwwwwwwww
No.722185
>>722182
>:DDDDDDD
Your spear is cool.
No.722188
>>722185
Thank you.
>looking around
...This isn't the bathroom.
No.722190
>>722188
>CasualEnk go
Eh? Bathroom?
No.722192
>>722190
Bathroom.
>unfolding a map
I think I took a wrong turn.
No.722194
>>722192
>PRESENCE DETECTION
There's running water over there.
>point
No.722200
File: 1451967557589.png (209.45 KB, 825x623, 825:623, b2a34fff4c939f954adb1018bc….png)
>>722194
There should be, it's a swam-
>oh
I've been thinking about it, and I want to try.
Siegfried doesn't see the point, though.
No.722201
File: 1451967617329.png (606.42 KB, 600x849, 200:283, 8f1af56e7d4fd77038e27b8479….png)
No.722206
>>722201
Using the bathroom.
I watch the people go in and wonder if I still can.
I did in life, sure, but not since the war.
Jinako sure didn't care either way...
No.722211
>>722206
That sounds novel!
>
Can we? I never needed to use the bathroom. I'm made of clay.
No.722214
>>722211
>hmmm
>squint
Are you full of water?
No.722217
>>722214
Water doesn't agree with me...
No.722219
>>722217
Then you probably can't.
But it wouldn't hurt to try.
No.722222
>>722219
>blink
Oh... well, good luck!
I'm going shopping!
No.722226
>getting sick of streetwalkers asking if she's a prostitute
>>722223
>shameful display
No.722230
>>722229
Shopping! It's where I spent Gilgamesh's money on things I like!
>
Doesn't Dragon Knight also have the Golden Rule? You should ask! It's nice.
>>722226
>um
No.722231
>>722226
>>722227
>>722229
All I wanted...was numbers.
>dies
No.722233
>>722229
>>722230
>please don't ask
>please
>don't.
>>722231
>you have failed your country
No.722235
>>722230
I know what shopping is.
>uh
I've never asked.
But it's fine, I don't need much.
>>722233
>judgin u
Why do you dress like a prostitute if you're not one.
Isn't it cold.
No.722238
>>722233
>you're not my divine harlot
>muh Shamhat
Eh?
>>722235
I learned last month!
>:DDDDDDDDD
You wanna come with me?
No.722239
File: 1451968967440.jpg (230.66 KB, 705x1384, 705:1384, mortal_kombat_deception__j….jpg)
>>722235
Not really, no.
And this how most people where I come from dress.
>Edenians are a weird kind of people
>>722238
Uhhh what?
No.722242
File: 1451969065291.jpg (189.44 KB, 850x609, 850:609, sample-5cb045e31416f34d219….jpg)
>>722238
There will be bathrooms in there...
>nods
Ok.
>>722239
Did...did they do something to deserve it?
No.722244
>>722239
You're not from Earth!
>>722242
>completely unveiled excitement
Yay!
No.722246
>>722242
No?
At least I don't think so.
>>722244
Well at least I didn't have to explain it this time.
No.722247
>>722244
What are you buying?
>
Also where are we.
>>722246
>
Do they use bathrooms where you come from?
No.722249
>>722246
I can feel it on the wind. You're from somewhere else, that's so cool!
My name is Enkidu, what's yours?
>>722247
I don't know, but all the bright lights are interesting.
It's not as nice as a lush forest, but humans don't like living with nature anymore.
>um
I don't know what I'm buying, that's the fun of it!
No.722251
>>722247
Yes we have bathrooms.
What makes you ask?
>>722249
My name is Jade.
I like your hair. It's a nice color.
No.722255
>>722249
>squigs an ear
>bangs Kundala
You don't have to shout.
>Launcher "wings" go
>>722251
It's been a long time since I had to use one.
I wonder if bathrooms are different other places...
>uh
>I feel like I stand out
>normal clothes
No.722256
>>722251
It's the color of leaves!
>tree branches grow out of Enk's head, bearing oranges
>wew
I like your revealing outfit, it's also the color of leaves!
And your skin is like earth. It's nice.
>>722255
But I'm not shouting.
Am I?
No.722258
>>722255
How long have you been holding it in?
Must have one bladder of steel...
>>722256
>wat
>those are oranges
Well thank you, it's rare I receive compliments for this outfit.
No.722260
File: 1451969850557.jpg (115.32 KB, 700x554, 350:277, 8785677c7055bca09a6f024002….jpg)
>>722256
...
>picks an orange off
>wipes it off on his shirt
>munch
That's not cannibalism, right.
>>722258
I don't think it works anymore.
>Karna stop
Your chest looks like oranges too.
No.722261
File: 1451969971728.jpg (597.61 KB, 900x863, 900:863, tumblr_nx4ba4YcsR1rfgwm5o3….jpg)
>>722258
>picks a head-orange
>branches are the closest thing to a skeleton Enkidu has
>self-sufficient clod of earth woopwoop
Want one?
>>722260
You're not made of earth, are you?
No.722263
>>722260
Wait what happened?
>looks down
I'm very aware of that.
>>722261
I'd be delighted.
>takes it
No.722265
>>722261
...
>spits the orange out
I should have asked.
>>722263
I died. Then I became my own dad.
No.722267
>>722263
You're really pretty, Jade. Are all the people like that where you're from?
>>722265
>s'just an orange
Eh? What's wrong?
No.722269
File: 1451970357351.jpg (141.55 KB, 800x1199, 800:1199, mortal_kombat__jade_by_mag….jpg)
>>722265
Wait what?
>>722267
Yes. I once had a friend who was as pretty as I am.
Dressed similarly too.
No.722272
>>722267
I think I'm allergic to citrus.
>itching his face
>>722269
I'm not really sure myself. It happened after my brother killed me.
There's probably books out there about it.
>
"Once had"?
No.722274
>>722269
That sounds wonderful! I wonder if Gilgamesh knows where it is...
>>722272
>um
>just kinda
>puts his hand on fuccboi's face
>and it detaches
>free mudbath
>git u clean
Better?
No.722275
File: 1451970591072.jpg (154.52 KB, 600x849, 200:283, Jade-MK-Deception-Alt.-Mor….jpg)
>>722272
I'll have to look up those books.
And yes. She died. I did too but I came back. She's also evil now which is just fun.
>>722274
Gilgamesh?
No.722277
>>722274
>
>
>wat
Exfoliating.
>nod
>>722275
And you're not evil?
>
No, I can tell.
I'm sorry for your loss.
No.722278
>>722275
My friend! He's humanity's first hero.
>
I'm its second!
>>722277
>hand regrowing
Good. I didn't know you were allergic.
>
What about apples?
No.722282
>>722277
It's no big problem.
It was probably that Liu Kang guy who helped her turn. I always thought she was too good for that turkey noise making kung fu guy.
>>722278
Really? Man, humanity has a lot of heroes.
I've met quite a bit myself.
No.722285
>>722278
I don't think apples are citrus.
>>722282
>imagining a turkey wearing a bandanna
Does he need to be judged?
No.722288
>>722282
We're its oldest. Lots more came after us, it's a wonder the world's as bad as it is right now.
I wonder why...
>>722285
>presto grow-o
>apple get
Here you go.
No.722290
>>722285
>that's not too far off
Judged? Well he is becoming a threat to this realm...
>>722288
Maybe because some of those heroes become corrupted.
No.722298
>>722288
>!
>munch
Maybe you could sell these.
No.722300
>>722290
Then they have to be judged for their fall!
>>722298
Eh? Why? I can just give them to people for free.
No.722305
>>722290
>hero senses tingling
Where can I find him.
>>722300
You have to get a license if you want to do it, I think.
It's to protect the people.
>Karna: Lawful Neutral
No.722307
>>722300
Some can't help it.
They're forced into it like I was once.
>>722305
The Netherrealm.
But wait! My friend still has some sense of good in her I'm sure.
Don't beat her up too hard. Though she could handle it...it's kinda what we're used to.
No.722309
File: 1451971859853.jpg (246.93 KB, 500x638, 250:319, 90a778e0cd01bd5353fb5198a5….jpg)
>>722305
I don't understand, so I'll do it anyways. It can't hurt anyone, unless they're allergic!
>Enkidu: Chaotic Good
>>722307
Guh. But something has to be done.
No.722312
>>722307
I won't, but I can't stop evil being judged.
>Netherrealm
>uh
...I'll ask Indra.
>guh
>>722309
You'll ask if they are, right.
>
Are we still shopping.
No.722315
>>722309
Beating the evil out of them should work. It always works.
If they're not too far gone.
>>722312
That's fine. Like I said, she can take a lot of punishment.
Maybe I could come.
No.722318
>>722312
Yes!
>has been walking and talking the entire time
>The Art of Distraction.txt
>>722315
Karna and I can do that!
>
Shopping?
No.722321
>>722315
If you like. She's your friend, after all.
What's Neatherrealm?
>>722318
>man I see through people not events
>
Why am I holding a box for Sharper Image?
No.722323
>>722318
I don't have any Earth currency. But window shopping is fun.
>>722321
Ever heard of Hell?
Yeah, that's it basically.
No.722325
>>722321
>rubbing the box
But it's not sharp!
>>722323
Me neither, but Gilgamesh has a lot of money!
>opens his pockets
>ivies growing around Enkidu's hands
>moths fly out
No.722328
>>722323
You mean Naraka?
South of the universe sounds really far, we should get started.
>>722325
I think it's like SkyMall.
No.722330
File: 1451972648871.jpg (173.12 KB, 900x1973, 900:1973, It's hard to come up with ….jpg)
>>722325
Eh, might as well!
>>722328
There should be ways to get there sooner...
No.722332
>>722328
What's that?
>>722330
Sooner? How?
No.722334
Shopping with Liz was a mistake.
No.722335
>>722330
>...
Oh.
>points at his weird red cloud behind him
In here.
>>722332
You can buy useless things on airplanes.
No.722338
>>722332
Portals? You'd be surprised at how many of those there are.
>>722335
Wow that was convenient.
No.722340
File: 1451973118041.jpg (62.99 KB, 850x474, 425:237, sample-ec635915509917ddfeb….jpg)
>>722334
Guard dog! You owe me a guessing game!
>>722335
Really? That sounds fun!
>>722338
Like the Gate?
No.722341
>>722334
...
>stacks his boxes on top of Cu's
Thank you.
>>722338
It is kind of stuck to my back.
After you.
No.722342
>>722340
I have no idea what that is but with a name like that it's got to be.
>>722341
Well...if you insist.
>in she goes
No.722343
File: 1451973236269.png (218.54 KB, 500x707, 500:707, 9026a8e800be528d99bbc957a3….png)
>>722340
Ha, I forgot about that. You wanna guess yet?
>>722341
Oi! The hell do you think you're doing you pale bastard?!
No.722344
>>722342
Bye!
>>722343
Another hint!
No.722345
File: 1451973345934.jpg (193.12 KB, 850x1152, 425:576, sample-dea1f06d780384c9843….jpg)
>>722340
Jinako bought a space heater from them once.
But I didn't get it, I thought space was a vacuum.
>oh
Have fun with guard dog.
>>722342
>weee
>>722343
I'll come back for them.
>spear get
There's someone that needs to be judged.
>whoosh
No.722346
>>722344
They're younger than the both of us. Way younger.
>>722345
Oi! Get back here and take your damn boxes!
No.722349
>>722346
They have to be younger than me, the only one older is Gilgamesh!
>blink
How young?
No.722351
File: 1451973670967.png (737.03 KB, 950x748, 475:374, 7e6c120aed867e628fa6769175….png)
>>722349
I'm kinda terrible with dates... Uh, around 500 I think.
No.722353
>>722351
>pondering
>tree branches growing thicker on his head
>flowers and fruit blooming
...You win! I don't know much about newer heroes.
No.722357
>>722353
>picks a fruit off
>nom
Don't worry about it. I couldn't figure it out either.
>looking around
Probably with Liz, huh...
>!
Gimme a second.
No.722359
>>722357
>butterflies everywhere
>all over the horns
>pretty levels: too
Eh? Can we meet them?
No.722360
File: 1451974365614.png (292.61 KB, 547x731, 547:731, 6b219de66ee2daae9e5dbdd49e….png)
>>722359
>texting on his phone
>barely managing the boxes
Yeah, come on now.
>walking into a department store
Listen out for Liz. You'll hear her before you see her.
No.722361
>>722360
>taking the boxes from Cu and balancing them on his head
>e q u i l i b r i u m
Great!
No.722362
>smol dragonloli running around excitedly with lots of clothes
Mago-nee, Mago-nee, what do you think of this one?
>"I think it suits you rather well, though the first dress fits better."
No.722363
File: 1451975018466.png (197.25 KB, 508x900, 127:225, 4fc791b8823c5854d9e99b525b….png)
>>722361
>keks externally
So why were you guys here anyway?
>>722362
Ah, found 'em.
Oi! Liz! Come get your boxes!
No.722364
>>722362
>
>>
>boxes still perfectly stacked on his head
Guard dog, guard dog! I don't get it.
>>722363
For fun! I like shopping.
>distant Gil screaming
No.722366
File: 1451975255339.png (392.03 KB, 627x886, 627:886, 06f6aa9c1c8a386ac62930618c….png)
>>722364
Oh, hello Enkidu! Here for shopping too? What do you think of thi-
>>722365
>jumps between them
Mago-nee, no! It's alright! He's a friend!
No.722367
>>722364
You got a bottomless wallet too, don't you.
>>722365
Whoa whoa whoa, calm down. Enk's friendly. We told you there's no need to fight everyone, remember?
No.722369
>>722365
>
>here, have an orange
Eh?
>>722366
>headtilt
>all the oranges on the horns tilt too
>>722367
>opens his pockets
>nothing but vines and moths
Gilgamesh does though!
No.722370
>>722366
Sorry. Force of habit.
>>722367
>nods
Weren't you with Tomo?
>>722369
>
>plunks with orange
>inspecting it
Enkidu?
No.722372
>>722368
>is that a bike
>inside a mall
>>722369
>grabs a fruit
You could probably make a killing off these.
>>722370
Was. I went outside for a smoke and he said he'd stay with you-
>"I'll go find him, I'll go find him!"
>and dragon loli runs off gleefully
Real attached to him, isn't she.
No.722373
>>722372
>my name is Johnny Blaze
>and I do what I want
No.722374
File: 1451976817604.png (224.23 KB, 477x620, 477:620, d1be885b9e8f19ebcc99aa14e3….png)
>>722372
Karna said that too, but I just give them for free.
>blink
Is that your Master?
No.722375
Hey, boy! Take a look at this-
>
Ahh, that's right.
>rubs the back of his head
Usually he'd be going "Riiiideeeeerrrr" in that voice of his.
No.722376
>>722375
So can you put me down now?
>under a bara arm
No.722377
File: 1451978973973.jpg (222.19 KB, 850x601, 850:601, sample-d865ce38cd5caedc4fc….jpg)
>>722376
Bah, that wasn't convincing at all!
>holds a shirt up to her face
...Mm, no. Green isn't your color, is it.
>
Were you under there the whole time?
No.722378
>>722377
No, I just decided to conveniently appear under your tree-trunk of an arm from out of the ether.
What's all this about wanting company?
No.722379
The air is so much cleaner than London.
>
>he's so excited
I haven't truly been outside in so long, this is wonderful.
No.722380
>>722378
Then you should have said something! That kind of ability has its own uses, you know!
>grinnan
Companionship is what life's all about, and finding out all the different kinds!
Besides, it's depressing to watch you lot all cooped up worried about that damn war all the time, and I needed an impartial opinion on my purchases.
>>722379
What ho! Assassin!
No.722381
>>722380
>can he not tell sarcasm
>fuck
Who's worrying? That green haired one'll decimate anyone who challenges whatever Pax Romana this is at.
>uh
You mean you wanted my opinion on whatever video games you're interested, right.
No.722382
>>722380
Good evening, Rider.
It's nice to be out of the swamp, isn't it?
No.722383
>>722381
Video games, sure! Among other things!
I haven't had the greatest opportunity to judge the contestants this time around, in my own way. Seeing as how I haven't had one in the longest time that wasn't that boy, it's no wonder!
>sets her on his shoulder
Now then, little Saber's Master. Show me something!
>>722382
Of course! The mildew and mold there really doesn't invite any kind of adventure!
That, and the toilet never worked
No.722384
>>722383
>woah okay gonna fall
>pretty much straddling the back of his fucking massive neck
Like what? You have a habit of putting me on the spot when we're together.
Spontaneity isn't my forte.
No.722385
>>722383
They do, however, make for oddly reactive components for alchemy.
Something in the water, or the dome maybe... either way it's truly fascinating. You see-
>here comes the babble
No.722386
File: 1451980374186.jpg (262.2 KB, 627x706, 627:706, c775a239f1f10b7cf5e4897b9c….jpg)
>>722384
>flex
Heheh, so you've figured me out.
You could say I have a habit of challenging those close to me, that boy could tell you well enough.
>shrug
>brace for aftershocks
Ah, but that's no trouble of yours. I can take you home, if you like.
>grin
But then you'd miss out on ice cream!
>>722385
>oh
>here comes the giant hand
>clomp
You too! Ice cream!
No.722387
>>722386
>he's still going
>it's muffled but sure
>followed by a thumbs up once the muffled nerdspeak dies down
No.722388
File: 1451980557665.jpg (126.69 KB, 600x839, 600:839, 353d661a38ce23faeb4030af1e….jpg)
>>722386
Close to you, huh...
>emergency pocky go
>nibbling like it's a ciggie
Ice cream you say.
No.722389
File: 1451980782841.jpg (274.23 KB, 850x1198, 425:599, sample-a23c09a4ec665b9036d….jpg)
>>722387
That's what I was waiting for.
>picks up by the head
You look like a pistachio kind of guy, am I right?
>>722388
>what is that chattering in my ear
Only the most delectable of sweets!
There are too many things to do that are inhibited by that swamp. This is only one!
>deep breath
MAKE WAY, YOU LOT! WE ARE IN SEARCH OF FROZEN TREATS!
>cue everyone scattering in terror
WAHAHAHAHA!
No.722390
>>722389
>muffled "how did you guess?"
>only slightly terrified of being lifted off the ground by his head
No.722391
>>722389
>he's like Alter but less uptight
>...I like it
>squeezes his neck with the thighs of dough
Onward!
No.722392
>>722390
The king knows!
>ghostly URRRRAAAAAAAAAAAA
>or was it just his imagination
>>722391
>jeez
To ColdSton-
>pauses at a mall kiosk
>squinting
...Eh, but there's also Baskin Robbins too...and Jon & Bon's...
No.722393
>>722392
So divide and conquer. Are you a man or are you a mouse?
>
Oi, put me down so we can actually do the dividing thing.
No.722394
>>722392
I should pick Master something up as well. Ice cream will melt... unless...
>more incomprehensible nerdtalk about perma-freezing ice cream
No.722395
File: 1451981862167.jpg (137.02 KB, 850x601, 850:601, sample-fda6adbfa6f3af0ef8f….jpg)
>>722393
>keikaku: all according to
"Divide"?
>arms folded
I was just going to hit them all one after the other, but what is it you have in store?
>>722394
Bah!
>turns him around
Listen up now, if you want to get your Master her ice cream, then you had better run it to her as fast as you can!
Either that or learn to enjoy yourself for the moment!
No.722396
>>722395
Fool. Even a Servant can only be in one place at once.
Same thing, different strategy. You take Coldstone, fuckboy in your hand will grab whatever one I'm not going for.
God help any idiot who gets in our way.
>so that's where Alter went
No.722397
File: 1451982403343.jpg (76.97 KB, 736x1049, 736:1049, 522f9142e3b635ca6359f54e27….jpg)
>>722395
Science will find a way for me to enjoy myself and get my precious Master her ice cream, Rider.
Isn't life about making new discoveries and forging paths?
This is my path.
>listening in to Kanno
I'll take the third one then.
No.722398
File: 1451982759710.jpg (180.52 KB, 850x601, 850:601, sample-eee143a2ae9dcfb51a1….jpg)
>>722396
>blink
Now that seemed a little out of character...
>grins
>hand on shoulder
Very well! We will open this campaign for ice cream gloriously and decisively!
>>722397
Ah...so that's how it is.
>DETERMINATION
Then I leave the science to you! We meet back here in ten minutes!
No.722399
>traipsing around with a full duffel bag
Fuck is this place...
No.722400
>>722398
>jesus his hand hurt
Operation Cold Storage, begin.
>off she goes
>three minutes later, wailing is heard from Baskin Robbins
No.722401
>>722398
Of course, King of Conquerors.
May your trip be fruitful.
>>722399
Two Hands?
No.722402
>>722400
>cackling like mad
Bigger! Louder!
>charging headlong into Coldstone
>looking at the line
But I can't simply enjoy this with just those two!
Everyone!
>hands up
Is deserving!
IOINIOI HETAIROI
>>722401
OF COURSE!
>turning to the troops
NOW THEN, WHO WANTS CHOCOLATE!?
>AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
No.722403
>>722401
Ah?
Oh, it's you.
Fuckin' hell, how the fuck'd I end up at a mall.
>squints at the note again
Package needs delivery, fuckboy, you know where this is?
No.722404
>>722402
Did he just unleash his entire army-
>flooded by URRRRRAAAAAAAAAA
>>722403
>after being trampled by thousands of ghost soldiers
...
...
...
>pries himself off the ground
My name is Henry, if you would. Henry Jekyll.
>note: taken
...
>Grail where the fuck is this
>gotcha
Do you have a map I can draw on?
No.722405
>>722402
>and she returns emptyhanded
>a large bystander with a mouse-shaped bruise on his forehead carrying two armloads of ice cream in buckets
There. Success on my end.
No.722406
>>722404
>just gonna file that away in shit I don't wanna understand
>
>uh
Leave the fuckin' map, you know where it is or don't ya?
No.722407
File: 1451983698156.jpg (87.82 KB, 850x478, 425:239, sample-5eb7c29f02aac675f04….jpg)
>>722404
>LET TIME
>RESUME
Here now! No laying about on the job!
>>722405
Wonderful!
>finally the front of the line
I'll take one of every scoop you have!
>"We're sorry sir, but all those...strange gentlemen you let go in front of you cleaned us out."
Ah...AHAHAHAHAHA!
No.722408
>>722406
If you don't have a map, I'll take you there. I'm not too good with giving directions verbally.
>>722407
>covered in sandy sandalprints
Did you need to do that, Rider...?
No.722409
>>722407
What the hell did you even do? Looks like you opened the gates to a zoo.
No.722410
File: 1451983995463.jpg (93.67 KB, 850x554, 425:277, sample-0d0bc692b739a2a3b0f….jpg)
>>722408
That's all I wanted to fuckin' hear.
>yanks the note back
Get a move on, Rawhide. I've got a fuckin' deadline to meet and the Cinnabon fumes are making me puke.
No.722411
>>722410
One moment, I made a promise.
>limps into the Jon and Bons and just nabs some ice cream
>exact change on the counter
>and back
Alright. Come with me.
>
>spiritmooooode
No.722412
>>722408
Need to?
No, of course not. But when you keep someone in your heart so closely and for so long, you do as much as you can in order to make them happy.
>grins
My someone just turns out to be 10,000 someones!
>>722409
My Noble Phantasm!
Ordinarily very difficult to use, but-
>grabs a handful of craym out of her bucket
>sticks it on his forehead
Ah, sorry. Lightheaded!
No.722413
>>722411
>
Wait what the fu-
>spirited away
No.722414
>>722412
>
Did you just-
>you triple nigger
Take what you want, is that it? Well then.
>climbing up Baraskander like Shadow of the Colossus
>nabs some of the craym off his forehead
>nom
Hmph.
No.722416
>>722414
>press X to not fall off
Hoho! Stealing from the King of Conquerors, eh?
That kind of gusto is what's sorely missing from people these days, you know.
>idly licking the dripping cream from his face
...That and boomboxes. Those were everywhere the last time I was here!
No.722417
File: 1451984668963.jpg (192.8 KB, 850x577, 850:577, sample-5471f6756861dce503f….jpg)
>>722415
>
>but with the Nth metal gun
You do shit like that and I'm fucking you a new asshole with this thing, comprende?
>guh
>looking around
Guess that's it, huh. Just had to drop it off.
>tosses the bag on the ground
>[satisfied]
No.722418
>>722416
It's not stealing, it's reclaiming.
>
I fought mouse and nail for that cream, like hell am I just gonna roll over and let someone take it.
No.722419
>>722417
Kapitan didn't complain.
>just kinda
>snatches the gun
>A+ agility
>ejects the clip and pulls the slide back to eject the round in the chamber
If we're being frank, I'm a little tired of people putting guns to my face.
No.722420
>>722418
That is correct, and not something I wasn't counting on.
To be a conqueror, you can never question your decisions. But planning ahead never hurts too, eh?
I'm starting to think you like being up there.
No.722421
>>722420
I had a big lover once. It's nostalgic.
>fucking Arty's 5'8''
No.722422
File: 1451985089134.jpg (191.09 KB, 850x1270, 85:127, sample-be53139997efa4d1608….jpg)
>>722419
Newsflash, fucko, but I ain't Si-
>NO
>MY GUN
...Tired of guns, huh.
Ok.
>holsters the other one
>when I get my knuckledusters I swear
No.722423
>>722422
I've noticed. She was a wonderful Master. Never questioned my ethics or morals, even accepted Hyde for the monster he is.
But you, I don't understand you.
No.722424
File: 1451985297885.gif (981.79 KB, 500x281, 500:281, tumblr_mr10sz4mQk1rkeknyo1….gif)
>>722421
Ahh, nostalgia.
Telling Saber to not live in the past like that...but then what is it that I do?
Gah, being a hypocrite is too much trouble to worry about.
>pawing around the bucket again
Besides, it's not size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog!
There are some even bigger than me, you know!
No.722425
>>722424
Hey-
>lightly taps his bicep with her foot
You're incorrigible. If I didn't find you somewhat satisfyingly fascinating, I'd have Saber kick your ass for taking my food.
No.722426
>>722423
That's the plan.
>Sis
>guh
Yeah well, maybe that's why I kinda liked her. She was somebody else. Knew her shit.
>grinning
Pulled some pretty fucked up stuff too in the name of the game, so what the fuck's your problem then?
No.722427
>>722426
I separated the "good" from the "evil" in me, into separate entities. That's the short explanation.
It's all just a matter of creating a chemical to alter brain chemistry.
No.722428
>>722425
Ha! I'd almost accept that anyway!
He doesn't seem as much of a waste of a human being now that he's a man, but I still don't think I can truly recognize him as a king.
>grin
You weren't going to make me ask, were you?
No.722429
>>722428
Maybe I was. To subjugate the king of conquerors, that'd be something.
No.722430
File: 1451985841266.jpg (136.09 KB, 849x607, 849:607, sample-a90eba9958b9b794e6d….jpg)
>>722427
Sounds like shit people worry about when they can afford to.
Good and evil don't even exist, so congrats on turning yourself into a fuckin' schizo or whatever.
>puff
You leave your Frankenstein shit at the door.
No.722431
>>722430
They're just ideas, Two Hands. But ideas have a basis. Traits.
Schizophrenia is a good way to put it, though. That didn't exist when I was alive. Maybe I created it accidentally.
>
Frankenstein, now there's an interesting story.
No.722432
>>722429
Subjugate, eh?
>did he just get bigger
That's awfully large talk for such a small woman.
But unlike that Goldie, I have no plans to turn down a challenge. Or lose!
No.722433
File: 1451986117386.jpg (84.07 KB, 500x708, 125:177, bdff867f7ea47e4c2b61c7e658….jpg)
>>722432
>I rike it
I wonder if Saber would challenge you.
>
Provided you two don't actually try and kill each other, I'd allow it.
No.722434
>>722431
Yeah? 'Cause I memorized it.
Stop me when this deviates from what you'd call the "story".
It's just an idea, after all. Ideas change, right.
>
So there's this doctor, and he's got it in his little fucked up mind to go playing God. God created man, y'know.
Only man didn't create man, he created God.
The monster was pretty fucked up, all he wanted was a wife, somebody who understood. Doc said nay, so the big man killed himself.
Where's the moral.
No.722435
>>722433
I don't really have any intention of killing anyone.
It would be hard for him to change if he was dead, eh?
But as a warrior, I guess I can't deny his own achievements that way, huh. I will fight him if he poses the challenge.
>
Ah, are you out already?
No.722436
>>722434
You have it for the most part. The monster did not die, the doctor did. Chased to the ends of the Earth by his creation, Victor Frankenstein gave into insanity and threw himself off a cliff after igniting himself. And the moral is not to rise above your lot in life.
It's not something I believe in, either.
I am a scholar and a scientist. To push boundaries well beyond the comfort zone of others is, quite honestly, the idea.
No.722437
File: 1451986636711.png (118.43 KB, 500x511, 500:511, tumblr_m6vs4mYP2a1rpznqgo1….png)
>>722435
If you don't mind taking me home, Rider.
No.722438
>>722436
So it just sounds fuckin' stupid. Got it.
>thumping her leg
Where's your fuckin' point, little man? You gonna analyze me and tell me exactly how fucked I am?
Save you the trouble, you and me both already know.
No.722439
File: 1451986865748.jpg (262.2 KB, 627x706, 627:706, c775a239f1f10b7cf5e4897b9c….jpg)
>>722437
Eh?
Ah. Fine, fine.
>
Onwards!
>LORD, I WAS BORN A RAMBLIN' MAN
No.722440
>>722438
Oh, you're not insane. No, quite the opposite.
Your cynical nature is interesting.
No.722442
>>722440
I'm not here to be your fuckin' science fair project.
>finished putting the ghostgun back together
>
Beat it.
No.722443
>>722442
What is a science fair?
>observan the gun
And here you said we were partners. The last I heard, partners don't maim each other.
No.722444
>>722443
You little punk fuckers just gotta try every card until it works, huh.
Well sometimes nothing does work. Tough fuckin' titty, huh.
>leeeeans in
Last I heard, partners don't gotta like each other either.
So whaddya say, partner.
No.722445
>>722444
You can dislike me, I have no problems with you.
>
My dear Kapitan liked you. That's all I need.
No.722446
File: 1451987535336.gif (973.63 KB, 500x392, 125:98, tumblr_nbrcujnlb61shbc9ho1….gif)
>>722445
So why the hell do I just wanna deck you in the face.
>
Quick talkin' about Sis. I don't need it.
No.722447
>>722446
You asked me not to psychoanalyze you, so I won't answer your question.
>
If you say so.
The old man, he's nigh invincible. I tried stabbing him in the carotid artery and his skin broke my knife.
I don't know what you're planning, but attacking is pointless.
No.722448
File: 1451987770778.jpg (90.66 KB, 435x747, 145:249, a738c40af2001278f8d3c841ae….jpg)
>>722447
But it's all I know how to do.
No.722449
>>722448
I was told you're extremely resourceful.
No.722450
>>722449
Who the fuck-
>Jason
Just goes to show you can't believe everything you hear.
How the fuck do you expect me to shoot a guy that's got bulletproof fuckin' skin?
No.722451
File: 1451988449673.png (239.12 KB, 372x553, 372:553, tumblr_nwq6x4gJ8H1uhhaveo1….png)
>>722450
It's futile.
>
>uh oh
I should get going. Quickly.
>up
>and walking away very quickly
No.722452
>>722451
>uh
Fuck you too.
>jeez
No.722454
>>722453
>ha
Hey dickweed! Gun's got bullets in it for a reason!
No.722456
>>722455
Don't hog it all!
>where did she get the M79
>Revy
>REVY
No.722457
>>722456
Fuck's sak-
>launched into the air
>sick air game shots
>thank you super assassin training
No.722458
No.722460
>>722459
>this high score tho
>JayandRevy100years.com
>blam
Where the fuck were you hiding a thumper?
No.722461
>>722460
Less talky, more shooty.
>u tryna run, kiddo
>tonk
No.722462
>>722461
>
And that's that.
Leftover False Facers. Fuckin' Roman... thought I ran his ass out of town.
No.722463
File: 1451990122993.jpg (417.99 KB, 850x1184, 425:592, sample_c166884688bb9d1cb1a….jpg)
>>722462
>looking only slightly disappointed
Whatever, those're freebies far as I'm concerned.
Who's the Roman fuck.
No.722464
File: 1451990210513.jpg (206.86 KB, 909x1080, 101:120, 4596195-img_20150531_15470….jpg)
>>722463
Roman Sionis. The Black Mask.
Mobster whose gang I blew to shit, threw'im out a ten story high window.
Should be dead. Guess he ain't.
Will be soon.
>
Freebie, huh.
No.722465
>>722464
You heard me. I don't do fuckin' coupons, got it?
Sounds like you need to keep throwin' him outta that window til it works.
No.722466
>>722465
Better idea.
>minigun go
Gonna mulch'is ass.
No.722467
File: 1451990519067.png (379.56 KB, 588x656, 147:164, 9ffa5972304c7ef3ae1f85135b….png)
>>722466
Boys'll be boys, or whatever.
>
Dropped your load off, ante up.
No.722468
>>722467
Yeah yeah, one sec.
>click
>BOOM
>and a warehouse just went up in flames
>cloaking device on his back turns off
>backpack removed and flung her way
No.722469
>>722468
>whistle
You're a fuckin' madman.
>whump goes the bag
>and slung over her shoulder
Stay gold, Ponyboy.
>off she goes
No.722470
>>722469
>
We're all mad here.
>gone in the opposite direction