/legion/ - Outer Legion

Ahh, it's good to be back.

>>732384

This is fine.

>>732385

>hops out from behind cover

>still inside the tree camo

OH MY GOD BOSS IT'S ALL ON FIRE

>>732386

Now now, I'm sure it'll be fine.

>on fire

>>732387

IT WAS JUST FOR FUN, BOSS. YA GOTTA REMEMBER THAT.

DO YOU REMEMBER THAT? 'CAUSE I DON'T WANNA GET IN TROUBLE LATER ON WHEN YOU FORGET, MAN.

ALSO YOU ARE STILL ON FIRE

>tree ignites

>>732388

...

...

...

AKITSU MARU I AM ON FIRE NOW

>rolling around

>>732389

BOSS YOU ARE ON FIRE NO-

>tripped

OH NO, I CAN'T AIM WHILE PRONE

>spinning around

>fast enough to create a breeze

>>732393

>fire blown out

Aw, my clothes.

This is fine.

>>732397

I'm naked!

>eating Snickers

Mmm, these are g--

>they start melting

Huh. That's pretty terrible.

>sniff sniff

Hey who's cooking?!

>>732396

SWEET LORD HE'S NAKED

>>732399

You could be nakeder.

>>732400

I blame you for this.

>still hanging from the fulton

>>732400

Naked.

>>732401

Yes. Yes I am.

Don't look, Akitsu Maru.

>>732403

I really couldn't.

>>732403

That's fine.

I'd blame me too if I didn't blame you.

>>732405

Doesn't that hurt?

>>732405

Is this about the sauna?

Because that was a completely justified expense you signed for while unconscious.

>fulton ignites

Oh.

>>732407

You can't blame me, I'm the funnyman.

>>732405

Moving behind the rocks!

>just

>turns around

>periscope lens sticks out a second later

>>732407

Nanomachines, Ocelot. They cool in response to high temperatures.

>>732408

You're still cleaning that sauna for the rest of this year.

>>732409

I feel... insecure.

>>732408

I already have.

>>732411

Me too!

Wait...I don't have nanomachines.

>pants are currently on fire

Fire must've not reached me yet.

>>732411

You've said that every year since 1974! Let it go!

Why do you think we closed the place for good after Zanzibar? Because I was mad at you?

>>732413

Feel like not being useless today? Any time?

>fulton pops

aaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

>>732413

Is my spare suit ready?

>>732414

You slept with Armadillo's girlfriend, in front of him, then hospitalized him for a month, you horndog!

>>732414

I bet you want help off of the ground.

Too bad I'm useless according to you.

>>732415

It's getting there, yes.

>>732415

Survival of the fittest, Boss! Survival of the fittest!

That's what happens when you drive Cecile away from meeeeeeeeeeeeee

>WHAM

Oh, my phantom pain.

>>732417

I don't need your help. Go groom DD.

>moving around

>looks like he's doing the worm

>>732417

I am left with no choice.

>strolls off

>returns dressed

My spare spare suit.

>>732418

I'm not the one who pushed her away by constantly trying to sleep with her.

>>732418

If you ain't careful you're gonna lose another arm to fire.

>>732419

Good thing my suit is doing just fine.

>the jacket is now on fire

>>732422

Ocelot, you're smoking.

>>732419

Well that wouldn't have been a problem if she'd just slept with me in the first place.

I still dream about those macaroons, Boss.

>>732422

What do you mean, another arm.

>pants are on fire

>>732424

I know

>>732425

You...you still have one arm left, don't you?

>>732425

You were a slut, Kaz.

A slut.

>>732427

No, really. Smoking.

...

...

...

You're--you're on fire, Ocelot. As in burning.

>>732427

>

I lost both arms to the Soviets, Ocelot.

This is just an inflamed lymph node.

>>732428

But a slut that didn't get any!

>>732429

You got too much.

>>732428

>looks at his arm

Well what do you know...

I have to save these.

>throws his pistols into a room that isn't on fire

>>732429

That's...unfortunate I guess.

>shrug

>>732431

B-Boss...

>>732432

And I know you're the one putting kick me signs on my back while I do paperwork. I can't see, I'm not stupid.

And no pretending you're possessed by Liquid, he's alive again.

>>732434

But...but Miller.

You don't understand! Liquid can control me even while he's alive!