No.763207
>>763206
Did I walk in your dressing room? Sorry.
No.763208
>>763207
It's okay. This isn't ours.
>still looking a little confused
No.763209
>>763208
Maybe it's the nieghbors clothing.
No.763210
>>763209
What should we do with it?
No.763211
>>763210
Keep it safe from fire,
I'm sure you'll do a good job on that.
No.763212
>>763211
Fire...
>looking around
>no fires in sight
>??
Are you lying to us?
No.763213
>>763212
Oh nothing, the lightning might catch it, then the fire will spread, then 1666 London will repeat...
No.763214
>>763213
>London
>internally triggered
Do you know about London?
No.763215
>>763214
It's a place in Britian?
No.763216
>>763215
You don't know about London?
No.763217
>>763216
I know the disasters that happened in it, but I never been to it
No.763218
>>763217
Do you know anything about us, about the Jack the Ripper?
No.763219
>>763218
Jack the Ripper killed people, that's all I know.
No.763220
>>763219
No one ever knows anything...
No.763221
>>763220
Are you looking for this Jack? maybe someone else saw him.
No.763222
>>763221
We are looking for the mother of Jack.
No.763223
>>763222
What do you want with a mother? Did she make you cookies?
No.763224
So she's still looking for her mother. Maybe Medea isn't paying her enough attention.
No.763225
Well. Now that the whole "Moat Thunderdome" thing is in the garbage, it's time to install Solidus as a Republican candidate.
No.763227
File: 1458762134842.jpg (47.91 KB, 440x423, 440:423, It's a fact that sunglasse….jpg)
>>763225
I wouldn't say it's completely in the garbage, some of Desperado is still lingering but yes.
It's mostly gone now.
But yes Solidus should be a decent candidate.
No.763228
>>763227
The best offense for them is just to disregard them entirely. Like what you did with Armstrong and I did with Trump.
I hear they stole your old body. Patriots cyborg ninja technology far exceeds the bulky nonsense Desperado has. More advanced.
No.763229
>>763228
Yes they did. Maybe they're hoping to upgrade their technology, reverse engineer.
But I really think they have something else in mind.
No.763232
File: 1458762915832.jpg (134.21 KB, 821x972, 821:972, BIG_BOSS_sketch_by_finalad….jpg)
No.763233
>>763232
They could try to bring back Jack the Ripper, my old out of control side.
Only when they did, he could have permanent control of the body...which'd mean bad news.
No.763234
>>763233
So toss a chaff grenade at him. The Patriots follow a pattern to the last detail. Every cyborg ninja since Gray Fox is coded with a weakness to electronic jamming as a failsafe.
No.763235
>>763234
...they did?
Right I mean of course they did!
No.763236
>>763235
We can only hope that Desperado hasn't figured that out yet. I can't imagine someone like Sundowner being savvy enough.
No.763237
>>763236
Something tells me they probably haven't, when I see Jack I'll have to test that out.
Sundowner's gotten smarter but not that much smarter.
No.763238
>>763237
This new body of yours is immune to chaffs, right?
No.763239
>>763238
Of course, Dok would only give me the best he could muster.
No.763240
>>763239
Then I don't need to worry about you. I've still got Donald to trump.
No.763241
>>763240
I have to wonder if Dok tinkered with the Patriots made body to make it immune to chaffs too...there was a time I wore it before switching to my new one.
And again recently too. Oh well, guess we'll see soon.
No.763242
>>763241
I'll be hiring Sam to assist with Trump. Those nanomachines are a bitch to cut.
No.763243
>>763242
Sam, huh?
Well if anybody can do it besides me, it's sure to be him.
Almost did too.
No.763244
>>763243
Unlike Armstrong, Trump's not much of an athlete.
The dynasty ends before it begins.
Maybe Zero was right, America needs Big Boss to steer the country in the right direction.
Not entirely right, of course... he wanted to extend that control to the whole world, using Solidus as a pawn.
This is the time to correct a heinous wrong.
No.763245
>>763244
Fair point, Trump won't be able to keep pace with Sam unlike Armstrong could.
But yeah, America needs somebody to lead it in the right direction. Who better than you...or Solidus? Speaking of which, where is he?
No.763246
>>763245
He's biding his time. Next time the blowhard appears it'll be a real battle for the fate of the country.
No.763247
File: 1458765396298.jpg (48.25 KB, 604x450, 302:225, tumblr_nlxxvty7CZ1qlnxfao5….jpg)
>>763246
Right, well looks like that might put a bit of a delay in things.
Who knows when Trump'll show up?
No.763248
>>763247
We'll know. He makes a big show wherever he goes.
No.763250
>>763248
He does, just hope it gets taken care of sooner rather than later...
No.763252
>>763250
It'll be child's play. Because he's quite literally a child.
No.763253
>>763252
Good, good.
Just making sure on that one.
No.763256
>>763253
Right now my intelligence division's stealing money from him to bleed his campaign dry while the FROGs go and destroy his monuments.
Damnatio memoriae is in full swing.
We could use those billions ourselves. The Philosopher's Legacy and Gene's cache won't last forever. That they've kept us going this long is a miracle.
No.763258
File: 1458766643242.jpg (62.88 KB, 755x458, 755:458, tumblr_nlxxvty7CZ1qlnxfao2….jpg)
>>763256
You're stealing his money?! That's-- good.
I imagine there won't be any left by the time you're done with him...
No.763259
>>763258
You didn't think I'd just be content with replacing him, did you?
No.763261
File: 1458766867844.png (439.24 KB, 643x460, 643:460, tumblr_nlxxvty7CZ1qlnxfao6….png)
>>763259
Should've figured as much.
>codec ringing
Hold on Boss, I gotta take this.
>paces off to a corner
No.763262
>>763261
Of course. I'm not going anywhere.
No.763265
>>763262
>hushed whispering
>angry yelling from the other line
>more hushed whispering
>codec ends
>walks back over
Okay, sorry for the interruption.
No.763267
>>763265
Trouble on the homefront?
No.763268
>>763267
You could...certainly say that, yeah.
No.763271
>>763270
I can tell you who was on the other line certainly wasn't happy.
No.763272
>>763271
They should eat more Calorie Mates.
No.763274
File: 1458767746752.jpg (79.09 KB, 838x954, 419:477, raiden_by_muromasiksm-d6rj….jpg)
>>763272
They probably should but...you know how it is.
There's been a change of plans for me, though.
I need to find Jack as soon as possible now.
No.763278
File: 1458768038912.png (143.37 KB, 500x296, 125:74, tumblr_inline_mi9g5v43Sk1q….png)
No.763281
>>763280
I'll do more than just kick his ass...I'll slice it to pieces!
I'll delight in every bit of it too...
No.763283
>>763281
But that's what the Ripper would do!
No.763285
>>763283
You'd be right if the Ripper still existed...I don't go by that name anymore. It's a Jack gave me when in his mind.
I'm free now! Since then I prefer the name...White Devil.
No.763287
>>763285
I
am so proud of you right now.
No.763288
>>763287
...what?
I just...I just revealed to you that I was the Ripper and you're...proud?
What kind of mindgames are you playing?
No.763294
>>763292
>looks around
This is some kind of trap isn't it?
You knew all along, didn't you?
You can't trick me, I know you...
No.763297
>>763294
Ohoho... poor boy. You don't know me at all.
No.763299
>>763297
Sundowner! Come in!
>"What?"
I need you here ASAP, we've got trouble...
>"See I told you, but you wanted to wait until Jack showed up!"
Just hurry!
>"Can't guarantee anything, like you said. You wanted to wait until Jack showed up so that's jus' what I'm doin'."
Shit...
Raiden will be here any minute, I know it...
No.763302
>>763300
...
>Think cool, White Devil...he wants me to break.
>If I go after him, that's a guaranteed CQC grapple.
>I need...I need to stay calm.
No.763304
>>763302
WAHAHAHA! You're sweating and I haven't even lifted a finger yet!
No.763308
>>763304
...because you're Big Boss, you always have some sort of coked up plan waiting for me.
What's it gonna be, chaff grenades? Is Sam going to appear? Or Raiden?! MAYBE BOTH OF THEM?!
No.763309
>>763308
>i actually have no plan
>maybe if i keep laughing he'll worry himself into retreating
That's just the surprise, isn't it? The anticipation must be killing you if what's going to happen doesn't do it first!
No.763313
>>763309
Just you wait, when Raiden gets here you're really in for it!
No.763316
>>763313
>SmugBoss.png
Confident, are you.
Suppose this is a trap. Do you think I'd allow even a slight chance of you getting away in one piece?
No.763318
>>763316
That's why I'll have Sundowner as back-up...
Jack won't be able to handle us both!
No.763319
>>763318
What makes you think he's doing it alone.
No.763320
>>763319
He always does things alone...most of the time.
No.763321
>>763320
Name one mission where there was no outside help, support crew or otherwise.
No.763323
File: 1458771061240.jpg (62.88 KB, 755x458, 755:458, tumblr_nlxxvty7CZ1qlnxfao2….jpg)
>>763321
His support crew is usually off-hands!
Like Boris, Kev, or Dok...
No.763325
>>763323
So you're saying... you're a little bitch, is that it?
No.763329
>>763327
You heard me. Jack the Ripper is a basic bitch.
No.763330
>>763329
>pulls out his sword
You'd better take that back if you know what's good for you.
No.763332
>>763330
What're you going to do, whine in your livejournal?
>bully mode activate
Clearly Solidus didn't beat you enough when you were little if this is the dark side.
No.763333
File: 1458771693999.jpg (47.91 KB, 440x423, 440:423, It's a fact that sunglasse….jpg)
>>763332
I've been holding back...
But now, I won't be!
>charges in
No.763334
>>763333
Oh no, whatever will I-
>sssssidestep
No.763336
>>763334
>out the window he goes
>gets thrown back in
No.763338
>>763336
Jack be nimble, Jack be quick. Jack jump over the candlestick.
No.763341
>>763336
>leaps in through the window
Bet you didn't see that coming, did you?
No.763342
>>763338
I'm gonna...kill you...
>>763341
>throws the disguise off
Right after I'm done with you!
No.763343
File: 1458772197825.jpg (105.23 KB, 500x333, 500:333, Caipirinha_Dance_Big_Boss_….jpg)
>>763341
Nice timing, Raiden.
>haha i didn't even plan for this
>>763342
Better men have tried. Only one's succeeded.
No.763344
>>763343
What can I say, I've been keeping hidden so I can get in on their plan.
Sundowner might be showing up any minute now...
>>763342
We'll see who'll be done with whom...
>INCOMING
No.763345
>>763343
I'm no mere man, I'm a cyborg!
>>763344
I'll show you why you shouldn't have contained me. I'm a better fighter like this...
>parry
No.763346
>>763344
I'll handle him.
>>763345
That makes you less of a man, you know.
No.763347
>>763345
You're outplayed these days, y'know.
Each time I try to get rid of you, you come back...what is this, the fourth time that has happened?
I'm used to it by now. So why don't you stay gone this time!
>throws a knife
>>763346
Good, Jack might keep me busy for awhile!
No.763348
>>763346
I never asked you, did I?
>>763347
>counters with another knife
>just goes in with his sword swinging wildly
You'll never win! Not with Sundowner by my side!
>loud thud outside
That must be him, say goodnight Raiden...
No.763349
No.763350
>>763347
Focus, boy!
>>763348
>coughcoughbasicbitchsayswhat
No.763351
>>763348
>blocks every hit
That's your problem, Ripper! You lack impulse control! Still need somebody to keep you under a leash, even if it's not me...
Good riddance I say!
>not even paying attention to what's outside
>>763350
>FOOOOOOOOCUUUUUUUUS
No.763352
>>763350
What?
>and then a fucking Desperado Metal Gear Ray broke through the walls
>"I'M FUCKIN' INVINCIBLE"
>>763351
He doesn't keep me under a leash, he's going to stomp you out!
>Sunny D RAY tries to stomp on Raiden
No.763353
>>763351
That's-ooh a RAY.
>>763352
Ha.
>just kinda
>rolls a canister at the RAY
>it's metallic archaea
No.763354
>>763352
Wait--
>rolls out the way
...that's a UG, how's he piloting that thing!?
Unless...you uploaded his brain into the damn thing!
>>763353
Ohhh right, that stuff.
That should do the trick.
No.763355
>>763353
>"HAHAHA--"
>it just freezes up
>"...oh."
YOU DIDN'T RUST PROOF THE THING?
>"Well I had it rubberized to prevent it from bein' electrocuted and I put drills in the feet to keep it from movin' in high winds. Didn't consider rust. Don't think we'd have 'nuff to coat a whole Metal Gear either."
You're an idiot, why do I work with you?!
>>763354
Well we did but apparently the idea of rust is foreign to Sundowner!
>attacks him while he's still on the ground
Don't need him to kill you either!
No.763356
>>763354
The ultimate in Metal Gear disposal in a can.
>>763355
And now we watch the showdown.
No.763357
>>763355
>block
>trips him up
Apparently you do!
>gets back up
>pins him to the ground
Any last words, White Devil?
>>763356
I should probably carry some of that stuff...
No.763358
>>763356
Watch as your "grandson" dies!
>>763357
>looks over to their side
If I'm going down, you're going down with me!
>slices the RAY's leg
>it's falling over
It's only fitting...you and I are one and the same!
So we die together!
No.763359
>>763357
You're rustproof, right? Oh. One second.
>>763358
Mm. No.
>Hand of Jehuty's Raiden over
No.763360
File: 1458774461938.png (291.79 KB, 626x341, 626:341, HE JUST FUCKING SUPLEXES I….png)
>>763358
Wrong!
>picks the RAY up before it crushes either of them
Some might call this overkill...but if it's what it takes, then it's what it takes!
Face it Jack, I'm the one doing the ripping around here!
>>763359
Yeah.
>yanked over
>while still holding the Metal Gear
Let me finish this, though!
>RULES OF NATURE
>AND THEY RUN WHEN THE SUN COMES UP
>throws it at the Ripper
No.763361
>>763359
Shit...
>>763360
SHIT
>"SON OF A BITCH."
>the RAY explodes upon impact
>there is now a RAY shaped hole in the floor
>rip in pepperoni Sundowner and Jack the Ripper
>nobody really liked them
No.763362
>>763360
My boy throws Metal Gears... reminds me of the time I threw the Cocoon.
I really am proud.
No.763363
>>763361
>heavy breathing
That takes care of that...
>>763362
Thanks Boss.
I think...that's the last we'll be hearing of Desperado.
No.763364
File: 1458774866449.jpg (175.34 KB, 850x819, 850:819, The most interesting merce….jpg)
>>763363
We're ordering a pizza in celebration with all your favorite toppings.
No.763365
>>763364
Really?!
That sounds pretty nice!
No.763366
>>763365
Was tossing that RAY part of your plan?
No.763367
>>763366
Of course...not.
I didn't know the Ray was involved...but when i saw it, I knew what I had to do.
No.763368
>golf_clap.exe
Impressive, most impressive!
>looks up from his kebab
And the fight wasn't too bad either.
No.763369
File: 1458775547531.png (195.02 KB, 550x767, 550:767, tumblr_o2v9boYxUI1urrjwco1….png)
>>763367
Pizza time.
>getting on his phone
Ocelot, it's time. Activate it.
No.763370
>>763369
That's what he thinks, but I'll never let it be pizza time again!
No.763371
>>763368
I think last night's was better, but yeah it was alright.
>>763369
I can't wait.
No.763372
No.763373
>>763370
I get the feeling that... someone needs a slapping.
>>763371
Ocelot's not picking up. So I'll just switch to codec.
No.763374
>>763371
I wonder why, it's almost like you were missing something!
Like, say, a crucial swath of purple hair?
>nudges his pointy ass shoulders
You were pretty good.
No.763375
>>763373
>on codec
You got it Boss.
>gets on another codec line
Activate it
No.763376
File: 1458776270478.png (636.54 KB, 756x584, 189:146, mgr_r___raiden_screenart_b….png)
>>763373
This sounds really complicated.
>>763374
Maybe? I think it's because the Metal Gear froze up before it really did anything. Not complaining, made my job a hell of a lot easier.
And you really think so?
No.763377
>>763375
Moshi moshi, Mirra desu
Akutibu!
No.763378
>>763377
>ring ring
OKAY, TIME TO ACTIVATE IT
No.763379
>>763375
Yosh.
>>763376
Juuust you wait. Only the best for a job well done.
No.763380
File: 1458776492559.jpg (337.79 KB, 721x700, 103:100, d53fc0f0cc8d8b5ee121a4d45e….jpg)
>>763376
It was alright.
>snaps
I've never seen such a big...whatever that thing was, good job
No.763381
File: 1458776542701.jpg (140.73 KB, 850x1236, 425:618, sample-b4b5cb76be0a407eb8f….jpg)
No.763382
>>763380
It was a Metal Gear.
>>763379
If you say so.
I guess you can't rush perfection.
No.763383
>>763382
Metal Gear? Is it like a Metal Vessel?
Bit ungainly to walk around with it, though. And am I crazy or did I hear that egg guy's voice coming out of it?
No.763384
>>763382
Now... for the finishing touches.
>
No.763385
>>763383
Maybe?
I don't even know what a Metal Vessel is.
And no, you aren't crazy. He uploaded his brain into the damn thing.
>>763384
Aaaalright?
No.763386
>>763384
This is Snake...I've activated it.
No.763387
>>763385
And... it's ready.
>>763386
Excellent.
Hey, son... wanna have a catch?
No.763388
>>763385
Well it's kinda like...Sorta like...I guess you could say...what I'm trying to say is...
>deep breath
M is for Magi that lead you to Dungeons
E is for Excellent Adventure~
No.763389
File: 1458777101962.jpg (108.65 KB, 500x817, 500:817, 750fe03e3f1595e417b062c71f….jpg)
>>763387
...Boss if we're doing that shouldn't it be me who says that.
>I mean
I'd like that.
No.763390
>>763387
Where is it?
>>763388
Are we really going through the whole song?
No.763391
>>763389
You never do so I had to.
>eeee
>>763390
>lifts a hand
>then blasted into a wall by a pizza box
No.763392
>>763390
T is for...for uh...
>snapping to himself
No!
No.763393
>>763391
>line crackles
Boss? What happened?
BOSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!?
No.763394
>>763391
Jesus!
Boss you alright?!
>>763392
You burst into song often?
No.763395
>>763393
Snake... tell Nagato... I'm very hungry.
>>763394
It's heeeere.
>
No.763396
>>763394
Well I'd like you to show me a better time to burst into song that isn't after a man conquers his own shadow.
I hear that Peter Pan lad never could and he burst into song all the time.
No.763397
No.763398
>>763395
CQC CPR
>punches through the phone line
>fist comes out the end
CLEAR
>WHAM
No.763399
>>763395
DON'T DIE ON ME, BOSS.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO EAT IF I'M SAD?!
>>763396
Peter Pan isn't real, though!
No.763400
>>763398
W-WAIT I WAS ONLY JOKIN-
>PAWNCHED
>>763399
IT WAS A JOOOOOOKE!
No.763402
No.763403
File: 1458777802962.jpg (70.24 KB, 850x602, 425:301, sample-e1230c037be360cf3e5….jpg)
>>763399
Well if what I said wasn't true then I'm not Sinbad the sailor!
Which I am.
>YEAAAAAAAAAHHH
Need some help here?
>sword out
>already crackling with electricity
No.763404
>>763400
IT WAS A BAD JOOOOOOOOOOOOKE
>ORAORAORAORAORAORAORA
No.763405
>>763400
DAMMIT BOSS YOU CAN'T JUST SPOOK ME LIKE THAT!
>>763403
No, nooooo we're fine.
No.763406
>>763404
OOOOOH NOOOOOO
>artificial hand blocking the PAWNCHes
>>763405
I'M SOOOORRYYYYYYYY
No.763407
File: 1458777942480.png (267.45 KB, 851x485, 851:485, 50e66e7008ec5f3396ae66fe3c….png)
>>763405
Doesn't look fine to me!
You stood alone for too long already today, time for JOLLY COOPERATION
And maybe some mild electrocution
No.763408
>>763406
IT LOOKS LIKE YOU HAVE THE SAME CLONE POWER AS ME!
>AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
No.763409
>>763406
>looks at all the punching
OH NO
THE PIZZA!
I GOTTA SAVE IT
>grabs the pizza from Boss' chest
>saves it from being SNAKE PAWNCHED
>>763407
Okay fine, but what would we use "jolly cooperation" on?
No.763410
>>763409
Well I can think of a few overreacting things right now.
>spears a slice through the box
>om
>!!
It's cold! I'll save you from possible stomach pains later!
>SHOCKA KHAN dat 'za
No.763411
>>763408
Snake.
>>763409
Eat! Eat to the extreme!
>DON'T YOOOOU
>FORGET ABOUT ME
No.763413
>>763410
...thanks.
I guess? I'm probably going to be saving some of this, though.
>>763411
I'll have one slice for now! Maybe save some for later!
No.763414
>>763413
Only...only a slice?
Come on, just one bite.
No.763415
>>763412
Snaaaaake.
>>763413
That's the beauty of pizza, my boy.
No.763416
>>763414
This is a special occasion pizza! I need to save it all for something special!
>>763415
Yes it is...
You can save however many slice for later. Might save about half.
No.763418
>>763416
Share some with your girlfriend, it's an Outer Heaven special!
>>763417
Snaaaaake?
No.763419
>>763416
But you have to eat it!
>grabs the pizza
This isn't any other pizza. This is pepperoni pizza
They made it special.
>opens the box
>pepperoni spelled out with GET A JOB
No.763421
>>763418
That's exactly what I was gonna do!
>>763419
>looks at the pepperoni
>I BET MASTER MILLER DID THIS
>takes the pizza back
You get one slice and that's it!
No.763422
No.763423
>>763420
Hi Snake.
>>763419
Why is this hermaphrodite manhandling your pizza, son.
>>763421
Good.
No.763424
File: 1458779177085.png (738.46 KB, 626x1000, 313:500, 1811a3e975c49de0c0cfd9dafe….png)
No.763425
File: 1458779239187.png (412.99 KB, 594x799, 594:799, 4fcf838a1d564ebde73d644a03….png)
>>763421
That's more than I expected!
>slice get
>RANKU AHP
>>763423
Hoho, hermaphrodite you say?
>AUO DRESS CHANGE
Guess again!
No.763426
>>763423
I don't know, he just took hold of it!
And yeah, I mean come on. I gotta share some with her.
>>763425
Sheesh.
That's it, though. Seriously.
No.763427
>>763424
Snake do you know this manlady.
>>763425
>
You're not doing much opinion swaying, Aerosmith.
>>763426
Son your friends are strange.
No.763428
>>763426
I'm just surprised you needed me to show you how to enjoy your own pizza.
It's food, it goes in your mouth! If you don't overindulge than somebody else will!
Namely me, and I don't want to get fat alone.
>>763427
Well I do have a pretty long neck guitar.
No.763429
>>763427
Boss that is definitely a man.
No.763430
File: 1458779690712.jpg (343.71 KB, 1200x1145, 240:229, Attention Cyborg Shoppers.jpg)
>>763427
I know Boss, I know.
I've come to terms with it.
>>763428
I'm saving it for a date, so I'm not going to overindulge in it!
That comes later.
Also cyborgs don't get fat.
No.763431
>>763428
Not if that leaf is anything to go by.
>SHOTS FIRED
>>763429
It can't be, clearly it's a manwoman. I've seen many in my life and I can tell by the pixels.
>>763430
You'll be making your own strange PMC in no time.
No.763432
File: 1458779961696.jpg (22.49 KB, 278x212, 139:106, abject lack of concern ove….jpg)
>>763431
Boss he has a...you know what never mind.
How do you know so many manwomen?
No.763433
>>763430
Handy!
So who's the lucky lady? Does she look like that?
>points to the toaster
>>763431
Trust me, if this leaf was any shorter you'd be in for a rude awakening.
Sorry old timer but you're not my type.
No.763434
File: 1458780107086.png (364.7 KB, 497x750, 497:750, Raiden you cannot give rel….png)
>>763431
I'm going to try avoiding that until the day comes.
With Desperado gone I can finally focus on more personal things.
>>763433
Wha-- You've already seen her!
She's not a toaster.
>I really tried to get Bladewolf with one, though...
No.763435
>>763432
Snake, hermaphrodites have both.
>
The 70's were a very loose time.
>>763433
See? Manwoman. I'll have to teach you to tell the difference, Snake.
>he's not even paying attention
>>763434
It's inevitable.
No.763436
File: 1458780277795.jpg (313.18 KB, 900x695, 180:139, MAGI-.The.Labyrinth.of.Mag….jpg)
>>763434
Did I?
It's been a busy couple of days for us, don't you think. I'll find a better time to interrogate...I mean question...
Er, get to know this person.
>>763435
Oh yeah?
Well could a manwoman rock a suit this good?
No.763437
>>763435
Please, please please please don't.
No.763438
>>763435
It's not that inevitable!
I'm not fit to run a PMC nor do I want to!
>>763436
It has been but still. You literally saw her the other day. Like two days ago. That's not that much.
What on Earth would make you think it's the toaster?
No.763439
File: 1458780703144.jpg (212.5 KB, 850x872, 425:436, sample-d6e2e39924acea4f2a7….jpg)
>>763438
Well I thought since you were metal down there it would be pretty difficult with a normal girl...
No.763440
>>763436
In a minute ma'am, I'm educating my son.
>>763437
You see, the primary difference is-
>now's your chance, Snake
>go to your happy place
>>763438
You're a son of Big Boss. Trust me, it'll happen at some point. Maybe not now. Maybe in a few decades. Who knows?
No.763441
File: 1458780913830.jpg (54.42 KB, 364x418, 182:209, 5a615c7cc4795c81712a88a98a….jpg)
>>763440
But green letters what if I need this knowledge.
>listening intently
>Snake no
No.763442
>>763439
See you think that but I can tell you it really isn't.
>>763440
>sigh
Boss I really think a couple decades from now, I'm hoping anyway, I'll be doing something else. I'll be too busy running to run a PMC
No.763443
>>763440
Ma'am? Where?
>>763442
But what if it's just your mind playing tricks on you.
>sage nodding
Besides, it's really the only area I could imagine you having trouble in.
No.763444
>>763441
>it's your funeral
>also mine
>I'll just
>beam the info to your head now
>>763442
Ehhhhh?
>>763443
Shhh. I'm teaching.
No.763446
>>763443
Again I just know. I was with a normal woman at one point...it worked.
It worked pretty well.
I'm not going to explain how because that's nasty but it did.
>>763444
Boss don't you know?
That girlfriend I'm dating is kind of a...princess.
Yeeeeaaah you can see where that might lead.
No.763447
>>763444
Teaching feeling?
>BOOOO
More than a feeling?
MORE THAN A FEEEELIIIIIING
TIL I SEE MARIANNE WALK AWAY
>>763446
Did you remember your hooks?
I didn't think a country as far removed from Sindria as America would have heard of next generation hygiene care like that but it looks like somebody's got brain problems.
No.763448
>>763447
>"NOW THAT'S AN ANCIENT MEME. EXQUISITE!"
SHUT UP MONSOON
Aaaand...what are hooks?
No.763449
>>763445
And that's how you do it.
>>763446
Now that's bizarre.
>>763447
And now I must go, my people need me.
>Teleport Fulton go
No.763450
>>763448
Why is that head still talking.
No.763451
>>763449
I told you Boss, I've come to terms with it.
>>763450
Shouldn't have left it intact.
Also you didn't answer me, what the hell are hooks?
No.763452
>>763451
...Well, you're probably old enough now to hear this.
>Sin what
It was long ago in a fishing village that this happened. And I mean long, long ago.
Anyway, the local populace had a problem. They were breeding so much that they couldn't get by on what little they could make for themselves from the river that ran through their village. Desperate and hungry, they turned to the river god for help.
The god answered, and said the solution was right in front of them the whole time. It told the men to wear their fishing hooks on their pants, and that by osmosis the hooks would "catch" any excess sperm that were causing all this overpopulation.
Now it's nothing more than a folk tale, but a nice one.
No.763453
File: 1458782525945.jpg (104.54 KB, 515x600, 103:120, tumblr_nadjx86c7G1se4tpno1….jpg)
>that's a Mew
>why is it following me
>what's a NuMel
>some kind of pokemon?
No.763454
>>763452
>
So...condoms?
>>763453
>oh my god a floating cat
No.763455
>>763453
A djinn?
>>763454
HELL IF I KNOW, I MADE THE WHOLE THING UP
OOOOOOOOOOHOHOHOHO
No.763456
File: 1458782725059.jpg (34.33 KB, 550x699, 550:699, e801f0d32a50f5bca2560f5509….jpg)
>>763454
>flips old dex open
Weird.
>and Mew bubbles away
>>763455
Put some clothes on.
No.763457
>>763455
So...why did you say hooks?
>>763456
He's not gonna put any clothes on, just letting you know.
No.763458
>>763456
Is this good enough, your royal kidness?
Jeez, everybody's on my case this week.
>>763457
Man you are just the opposite of fun.
Stop thinking about things so hard, you just completed a quest!
No.763459
File: 1458783017081.png (211.5 KB, 505x642, 505:642, 3d60d58f90cd940959ad62ebd4….png)
>>763457
Looks like he did.
>>763458
>why does this guy
>sound like a nerd
>I want to bully him
Weirdo.
No.763460
>>763458
I am plenty of fun, in what way am I not fun?
>>763459
...wow.
Somebody else tried that like a day or so ago and it went much less successfully.
No.763461
>>763459
>can't touch this
Aren't you a little short for a stormtrooper?
>>763460
Do you want the answer you'll like or the one you don't want to hear.
No.763462
File: 1458783244927.jpg (179.35 KB, 777x804, 259:268, 7a6e82ae3a30d1b1ca6fdcda5a….jpg)
>>763460
Is he your friend or something.
>>763461
These aren't the droids you're looking for.
No.763463
>>763461
Give it to me straight.
>>763462
>looks at Sin
>
Yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyes...?
No.763464
>>763462
These are not the droids I'm looking for...
>shakes his head
Don't do that.
>>763463
Well you look kinda funny, your voice sounds like you gargled a bunch of ice and nails, you need a haircut more than I do, the interior doesn't match the exterior, and-
>SERIOUS
You're just like a bunch of others I knew.
No.763465
File: 1458783512775.jpg (59.74 KB, 600x482, 300:241, 913eb4f1984290b74e158ca8a1….jpg)
>>763463
Oh.
>entirely unfazed by Raiden being a nightmarish cyborg
Cool sword.
>>763464
Don't tell me whattado.
No.763466
No.763467
>>763464
I do not need a haircut, but the rest of your claims are somewhat valid.
Expand more on that last comment, though.
>>763465
Thanks, it's something else.
No.763468
>>763465
Not in this lifetime.
I would never tell anyone to do what they didn't already want to do.
>
Except that.
>>763467
>shrugs
People with lots of spirit come and go, they're all usually the same. Bad childhood, something to fight for, dehumanize themselves in the process.
I've seen about all I can take, really.
No.763469
>idly tempted to throw a pokeball and see if it works
You look like someone from a manga.
>>763468
Exceptions are like butts.
No.763470
>>763468
That sounds a lot like me but I'm trying to not dehumanize myself...I may not look human but I still feel like one.
At least that's what I hope...
>>763469
I get that a lot, not sure where it comes from though.
No.763471
>>763469
They're soft, round, and criminally underrated?
>uh
That's one big mouse you have there.
>>763470
Not the point.
There is no try, only do and do not.
A small green creature taught me that.
No.763472
>>763470
>fishes a volume of Cyborg 009 out of his backpack
Like this.
>>763471
He's my friend.
No.763473
File: 1458784371072.jpg (179.33 KB, 850x694, 425:347, Pogeymans Rising Revengean….jpg)
>>763471
Well you can't just change things in a day.
I can't say I've done it because...I don't feel like I have. Not yet.
But I haven't given up either...
>>763472
Yeah okay, now I see it.
No.763474
File: 1458784455383.png (157.55 KB, 500x281, 500:281, tumblr_nywnnmz8oT1st6nrxo3….png)
>>763472
Then that's all I needed to hear.
The name's Sin, what's a precocious little squirt like you doing out here?
Adventure?
>>763473
>sigh
You still don't get it, do you.
No.763475
>>763473
You could be a superhero.
>>763474
I go where I wanna go.
No.763476
File: 1458784668999.jpg (101.32 KB, 900x678, 150:113, raiden_from_metal_gear_ris….jpg)
>>763474
Are you trying to teach me something?
>>763475
I already kind of am...
No.763477
>>763475
Oho, independent at such a young age, reminds me of me!
Welcome to the swamp then, young traveler.
Although something tells me I'm not the one to be doing the welcoming.
>>763476
Was I?
>wine go
>is he just messing with you, Raiden
No.763478
>>763476
>thumbs up
I'm Red.
>>763477
>blink
I don't get it.
No.763479
>>763477
Uhhhhhh...
>absolutely confused
>>763478
Raiden.
Jack if you prefer.
No.763480
>>763478
Really? I was hoping somebody could tell me.
>>763479
>holds a finger up
>ssssssssssssssssssssssssip
No.763481
>>763479
Raiden's cooler.
>>763480
'Kay.
>time to let out Venasaur
>using plantbro for shade
No.763482
>>763480
This seems to be getting more and more random.
>>763481
Raiden it is, then.
So Red, what's someone like you doing here?
No.763483
File: 1458785382206.gif (550.43 KB, 500x315, 100:63, tumblr_ntrlf7VDJt1u7xrnxo2….gif)
>>763481
>sneezes
Oooooo!
>
>>763482
No, it's becoming more drunk.
Trust me!
You know, if you're ever looking for work or just a place to come and lay your head, Sindria could always use guys like you.
No.763484
>>763482
I got bored of sitting on top of Mt. Silver.
>shrug
That's all.
>>763483
>uh
No.763485
>>763483
You? Drunk?
Joy.
And where is this...Sindria, then?
>>763484
So you sat on top of a mountain, got bored, and came here?
Huh.
That's not the worst reason I've ever heard.
No.763486
>>763484
>pokes out of the big lily on the top
What a wonderful creature this is!
You're all pretty lucky to have each other, aren't you.
>>763485
Don't just ignore my only good point!
No.763487
File: 1458785779695.jpg (103.2 KB, 450x511, 450:511, 9c5fdd54849ab778b1ef349c8a….jpg)
>>763485
Every adventure begins with boredom.
>>763486
>lucky plant's nature is docile
You've never seen a Pokemon before then.
No.763488
File: 1458785906723.jpg (36.61 KB, 500x281, 500:281, tumblr_nfnloj2OiE1tbl2xjo3….jpg)
>>763486
What good point? I addressed each and every point you had.
>>763487
So why were you on that mountain anyway?
No.763489
File: 1458786019539.jpg (310.44 KB, 855x482, 855:482, b56ec90f455a78fa1c2af41f23….jpg)
>>763487
Was it that obvious?
>pettan the leaves
Smells a little like Sindria...
>>763488
Exactly!
>throws his wine
No.763490
>>763488
There weren't any more challenges for me. So I climbed a mountain.
>>763489
Sinnoh?
No.763491
No.763492
>>763489
But...was there a point I missed? A hidden point?
>>763490
You...climbed a mountain due to lack of challenges?
Surely there was a better option.
No.763494
>>763490
Sindria.
A beautiful island paradise, the kingdom I created to unite the people's of the world. To create a place where the disillusioned or unwanted or just anybody willing to follow me could go.
And you can't beat the tiki bars.
>>763492
Yes, actually.
And you're ruining it the more you look.
No.763495
File: 1458786461923.jpg (185.43 KB, 850x1511, 850:1511, sample-3470d7fee4b411bb628….jpg)
>>763492
Carpe diem.
>>763494
Why would people want to follow you.
No.763496
>wanders down stairs and pours himself a cup of coffee
No.763497
File: 1458786524880.jpg (361.81 KB, 707x1000, 707:1000, mgr_r_raiden_by_olivia730-….jpg)
>>763494
>"KID, LOOK FOR THE MEANING BEHIND THE WORDS."
>"you're ruining it the more you look."
Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...
>>763495
Yes but...a mountain? What did you do up there?
No.763499
>>763495
What do you mean why would people want to follow me?
Why wouldn't they want to follow me?
>>763496
Ah, you've got a little something.
>steps on the toilet paper stuck to Char's foor
>>763497
Wait wait let's harmonize.
>ahem
Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
No.763500
File: 1458786700489.jpg (59.74 KB, 600x482, 300:241, 913eb4f1984290b74e158ca8a1….jpg)
>>763497
Played king of the mountain.
>literally
>gotta battle to earn yo place at the top
>>763499
>
I don't see it.
No.763501
File: 1458786712369.jpg (510.79 KB, 989x1178, 989:1178, tumblr_mlfnucqKAe1rvsw16o1….jpg)
No.763502
>>763499
>synchronized "Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh"
>>763500
Literally so, huh?
I think that's just a saying, kid.
No.763504
>>763500
How about if I turn this way?
>gleam
Ask me anything. It's the obligation of the people to know everything they can about their leaders.
>>763502
>uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
>oh god it's getting louder
No.763505
>THUD
>THUD
>THUD
Wait-tooclosetooclose!
>Hrrrghhgghhh
...phew
No.763506
File: 1458786964835.png (190.46 KB, 745x418, 745:418, tumblr_o2d9ogpR061qdeqx3o2….png)
No.763507
File: 1458787015557.png (211.5 KB, 505x642, 505:642, 3d60d58f90cd940959ad62ebd4….png)
>>763502
Not anymore.
>>763504
Okay.
Why do you think you're my leader.
No.763508
>>763498
>Groggy
>Watching her eat the doughnut
>Somehow she was managing to make that sexy
>Incredible
Ready for wilderness training tonight?
No.763509
File: 1458787087562.jpg (34.33 KB, 550x699, 550:699, e801f0d32a50f5bca2560f5509….jpg)
>>763505
>
>
>
>what the heck is that
>Pokedex go
No.763510
>>763504
>Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
>somebody stop these absolute madmen
>>763505
METAL GEAR...?!
AGAIN?
>>763507
Really?
I must be out of date with sayings.
No.763511
>>763506
Cool mask, eh bro?
No.763512
>>763508
Yus! I brought fatigues for camouflage!
No.763513
File: 1458787266938.jpg (120.3 KB, 550x886, 275:443, b7f6ddb3c61468df811539e310….jpg)
>>763505
Whoa nelly!
>backing up
>falls off Venusaur
Ack!
>>763507
Your leader? Well that's nice of you to say but that's not up to me.
>nodding
My goal was to make a country, and I did. Populating it is up to whoever wants to come.
>>763510
>UHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
This is worse than Zepar!
No.763514
File: 1458787312831.png (374.45 KB, 500x633, 500:633, tumblr_o0y6ysUXBG1uurzuio1….png)
>>763511
It's a mask, yes.
>rose
>looking around for Lucifer swords
No.763515
>>763509
>Regigigas, the Fuckinghuge Pokemon
>peeks up from inside its hand
...hi.
>>763510
But...Regigigas is Normal type. Registeel is-
>'HRRRRRR
O-okay, I won't talk about them, sorry...
>>763513
Hi to you, too...
>the titan's eyes glint menacingly
No.763516
>hooking up his old Super Nintendo
No.763517
>>763512
Excellent! We'll be issuing you a set of red desert fatigues. Our planned landing site is in the San Rafael Swell. We're going to be simulating a crash on Mars so this is going to be counter-intuitive survival training with certain assumptions. We are to ignore edible flora/fauna and assume the atmosphere isn't suitable for breathing or lighting a fire under normal circumstances.
No.763518
>>763513
Phrasing.
>>763515
I thought the rules said no legends.
>>763510
I made it not a phrase.
No.763520
>>763515
>is that a djinn
>it looks like a djinn
>I kind of want to conquer it
Mighty big chaperon you have there, missy. Does he bite?
>>763518
Ha!
Oh man, I can already feel the incoming slaps.
No.763521
>>763513
>UHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
We aren't even doing it anymore, what gives?
>>763515
Wha--
>looks at it
That's not a Metal Gear at all. I just heard the stomping and instantly assumed it was a Metal Gear.
That's what loud stomping things usually are when I'm around.
>>763518
But why?
No.763522
>>763519
Only "what you thought to bring in case of emergency" so basically emergency cockpit rations.
Don't worry - Zeon MRE's are known for their variety and creative flavors and there's 2 weeks worth of food and drink stored under the floor.
It'll be like camping but pretending the air is poison!
No.763523
I believe this is all happening for a reason.
No.763524
>>763520
>uh
>do i throw a sticky barb at him orrrrr
>patting 'saur's head
That's also a Pokemon. That's not supposed to be here.
There are rules.
>>763521
Because I could.
>>763523
Oh no.
No.763525
>MK's eyes are glowing as bright as car headlights
...This could get annoying.
No.763526
>>763522
Aha... ahaha!
>reaching into her cleavage
>melon bread get
I carry many snacks!
We will nut starve. But I do nut have drinks.
No.763527
>>763516
You brought that here? Someone's gonna break it.
>>763525
>BLINDED BY LIGHT.mp3
No.763528
>>763525
>blowing into a cartridge
Dude, I found my old gaming shit. Turn down the brights and lets have some fun
No.763529
>>763521
>?
>tapping one of his rings
Zepar's reacting to the noise too, are the acoustics in here really that good?
>>763524
Rules, eh.
Sounds kind of like how Dungeons have rules. But that doesn't stop anybody from breaking said rules much anyway.
>hmm
You don't look like a lawbreaker to me, especially with that crack about the pants!
>>763525
>shielding his face
Whoever's the owner of the white cape, you left your lights on.
No.763530
>>763520
>it'd be pretty easy
>as long as you do it in five turns or less
Nope. He doesn't have a mouth.
>picked up delicately by the scruff of her shirt and plopped onto the ground
>>763521
But...gears don't have legs, how could they stomp?
>>763518
I didn't catch him. I just asked for a ride.
>waves as Regigigas departs for Snowpoint Temple
No.763531
>>763524
The rules have been broken.
One will be reborn.
No.763532
>>763524
Well at least you have one hell of initiative.
>>763529
I guess so?
Never realized that until now.
>>763530
Metal Gear isn't an actual gear...well it has gears in it because it's a machine but...it's like...a giant robot.
If you want to take a look at one I think the hole I left in the floor earlier still has one in there.
No.763533
>>763529
I broke them once and couldn't get off the mountain for three years.
So I don't anymore.
>>763530
>points to Nuzlocke
Tell that to him.
>>763531
Uh.
>>763532
You need to take control of the life you're given.
No.763534
>>763527
Uh... whoops.
>>763528
I've been trying to tone it down. Nothing's working.
>Fuck's sake, you can't do anything on your own, can you?
>Khonshu is now adjusting the brightness settings
>glowing: minimal
...Never mind. Looks like I'm good.
>>763529
>rolls his eyes
Really? I hadn't noticed.
No.763535
>>763534
This is why I should wear my hood more often.
No.763536
>>763530
>you poor uninformed loli
Well that's a little more realistic than I imagined.
>waves to RegiHUGE
>>763532
What do you mean you guess so, can't you do a robot thing and scan the area?
You know, now that I think about it your shadow had the same looking plate on his head the curvy golem did.
>hmmmmmm
>>763533
Sounds like you weren't just breaking them enough
>>763534
Always around to do a service, your friendly neighborhood Sinbad.
No.763537
File: 1458789022105.jpg (328.04 KB, 582x584, 291:292, tumblr_mpy88iPvUn1swtsbuo5….jpg)
>>763527
Jay, this is my back up. I bought a second one when I thought I lost my old one.
>digging in his bin of games
OOOO! Earthworm Jim!
>>763534
That is creepy man.
Now the plan is to drink as much Dr. Pepper, eat tons of gummy candy and play video games so hard that someone pukes.
No.763538
Tropius.
Tropius can you just uh-
...Good effort!
No.763539
>>763526
>Staring at her cleavage
>The wonders of the universe that must lie between them
>It was a world he wanted to see one day
>A world worth fighting for
>Oh right she said something
I've got plenty of drinks! Anything you can think of pouch-packaged with little sippy-straw-lids for zero-gravity and to keep Mars atmosphere out. It'll be a fun time!
No.763540
>>763536
You don't understand.
>>763538
>uh
Nuzlocke thinks the rules got broken.
No.763541
File: 1458789497010.png (473.84 KB, 500x742, 250:371, tumblr_nsa7tbUqGu1u3j2f8o1….png)
>>763540
In a minute, I'm getting Tropius to be more assertive-
>squealing tires.sfx
Oh.
No.763542
>>763539
Then there will nut be prublems!
>crisp salute
No.763543
File: 1458789564270.jpg (301.93 KB, 1280x1926, 640:963, raiden_metal_gear_rising_b….jpg)
>>763533
Got that right, and it sounds like you've done a good job of just that.
>>763536
I can but I don't really want to. I see unsightly stains when I do that. Like the worst kind of unsightly stains.
And...what are you implying about the Ripper?
No.763544
File: 1458789566309.jpg (239.57 KB, 800x533, 800:533, Keep your hands where I ca….jpg)
>>763535
If I knew the full moon was gonna turn me into a human flashlight tonight, I would've warned you ahead of time.
>>763536
Sinbad, huh. With a name like that, I should've guessed you'd be a shitty comedian.
>HEYOOOO
Be careful about the whole "friendly neighborhood" thing, too. Pretty sure somebody has that trademarked.
>>763537
Sounds like a fun night to me.
No.763545
>>763537
Oh shit you got Earthworm Jim? Hell yeah!
>>763544
Really hope so. Damn my eyes hurt.
No.763546
>>763542
I'm going to finish my coffee here and then we should get going. I'll be your instructor for this assignment.
No.763547
File: 1458789675810.png (538.11 KB, 849x479, 849:479, Beautiful day for beautifu….png)
>>763540
Then help me understand.
>is it the Charisma B or just the fact he's wearing pants for once
>>763543
Stains?
Anyway, I think your Ripper just might be a woman.
>shakes his head
Killing a girl like that, shame on you.
>Sin
>>763544
I'll have you know that's already not too far from the truth!
>audience coughs
>Yeah kinda
Trademarked?
No.763548
>>763544
>slams the door down
I came as soon as I heard somebody was infringing on something I do!
No.763549
File: 1458789741981.jpg (88.89 KB, 850x602, 425:301, sample-9afd1dbdd6046ce4184….jpg)
>>763546
Really?
>possibly excited
No.763550
>>763532
>peeks down into the hole
Oh...that's a big robot.
>aims her Pokedex at it
>NO DATA AVAILABLE
>>763533
...oh!
>>763531
I didn't catch him. See, he's gone now...
>pokes her fingers together
>>763536
Well...maybe he does. But I've never seen it.
Who are you...?
>>763538
...g-good job-
>slapped in the face with a palm leaf
Oof
No.763551
>>763541
>takes the pin off his hat
>and puts it on the beanie
It's not your turn this time.
>>763547
You don't break the rules or you get punished. There's no way around it.
No.763552
>>763550
sssssssssssssssssssssssss
>gone
No.763553
>>763547
Yeah, stains of time
And no, it was me. I mean I get I look like a woman but...he wasn't because I wasn't.
>>763550
Yeeeaaaah I threw it down there. It tried to kill me.
I only paid it back in kind.
No.763554
File: 1458789925586.jpg (103.2 KB, 450x511, 450:511, 9c5fdd54849ab778b1ef349c8a….jpg)
>>763550
I hope it's not too late.
No.763555
File: 1458790064928.jpg (164.84 KB, 1082x1920, 541:960, tumblr_o347vroiua1usm0nro1….jpg)
>>763550
Sorry!
>GET BACK
>GO PUFFDADDY
>pomf
How's it been, Dawn?
>>763551
>grin
Sorry, bro. It's always my turn.
But I'll be back, don't you worry. I was just glad to come home for a little bit.
No.763556
>>763555
>shakes his head
I gave you the pin for a reason.
>walks off
>senpai's taking responsibility
No.763557
File: 1458790188141.png (431.4 KB, 851x479, 851:479, This man is your friend, h….png)
>>763550
>
And who might you be?
>>763551
There's always a way around it.
If I had a nickle for every time someone's told me something was impossible, I'd still have more money.
I am so goddamn rich.
>>763553
But wouldn't the opposite of you be a woman?
And you're a man, aren't you?
No.763558
>>763545
So do mine. Really wish I had some other indicator of when my powers kick in.
>Look, it was either glowing eyes, or alarm clock noises. And NOBODY enjoys the sound of an alarm clock.
>Point taken.
>>763547
Yep. Don't want to end up with a lawsuit, do ya?
>>763548
>points to Sinbad
Somebody used the friendly neighborhood line without permission again.
No.763559
>>763544
Its the best night
>>763545
Remember the Cartoon.? That cartoon was so great
No.763560
>>763549
Yep!!
>Finishes his coffee
Alright, lets roll out!
No.763561
>>763557
He was only a metaphorical opposite!
He was my inner demons...that's like saying he should be fully human because I'm a cyborg!
And he wasn't human!
No.763562
>>763556
>wan smile
Hope he's not too rough on Nuzlocke when he sends him back.
Your eyes are red, Red, but not like me.
No.763563
>>763558
Did he now?
Well he'll get off free. I have bigger problems right now.
No.763564
>still covered in body glitter and party beads
Man, what a mission...
No.763565
>>763560
Yus!
>just kinda
>picks Char up like he's a cat
>and runs off in probably the wrong direction
No.763566
>>763565
>Being squished into her tits
>:3
>Is that audible purring she hears?
No.763567
>>763558
You underestimate me.
>POINTS
I'll just sue for him to leave my ass alone!
>>763561
So what does that make you?
A reflection is just that, a reflection. I've seen enough in my time.
>thinkgen of Ja'far
>man that was fucked up
All jokes aside, he was as human as you are. Take that how you will.
No.763568
>>763564
>"That wasn't a mission. You locked yourself in the party supplies closet for a week."
No.763569
>>763564
Some mission, huh?
>>763567
I know he was...I can't let myself become like him, though.
I refuse!
No.763570
>>763568
I'd never taken crazy party drugs before. It was a new experience.
Last thing I remember was a Van Halen concert and you blasting people with a T-Shirt cannon.
>>763569
That's a fact, Jack.
No.763571
File: 1458790782362.jpg (146.78 KB, 1088x808, 136:101, 0fd010d5505e13804d4c5f161d….jpg)
>>763552
>what am I gonna do if he catches Darkrai following me again
>aaaaaaaa
>>763553
A robot tried to kill you? Are you sure no one was inside...?
>>763554
...I didn't even battle him, I'm sure everything will be fine...
>actually I'm not sure at all
>tugs her hat down anxiously
>>763555
I've been traveling with Cynthia. She knows things most libraries don't...I don't think the League is happy she keeps taking me out on trips, though.
How have you been...?
>>763557
Sinbad?
>he looked a lot
>...
>beefier in the cartoons
My name is Dawn.
No.763572
>>763562
>
Gold took longer than I would have liked.
No.763573
>>763570
>"Boss that was last month."
>"You've been in a party coma."
No.763574
>>763559
I don't get a chance to play video games that often either. This oughta be interesting.
>>763563
>squiiint
I'm not talking to Mysterio again, right?
>>763567
...Do you even know how lawsuits work?
No.763576
>>763571
Someone was inside alright, some crazy bastard I fought before uploaded his brain inside of it.
There was no pilot, he was the robot.
>>763570
I was here fighting a Metal Gear and my inner demons.
Also pizza.
No you can't have any.
No.763577
>>763571
I've been good! Just getting ready to-
>do not let kouhai know about the reincarnation
>uh
...Get traveling again! Me and Red just came back from South America, it was great!
I thought you abdicated the spot to her a while ago?
>>763572
>UM
Red you have a beard now.
No.763578
>>763574
Nope, I'm just saying. I've got big problems.
>pulls out the Big Gulp from a couple nights back
This thing...still isn't empty. I think it might be bottomless.
No.763579
>>763569
So don't.
There, was that so hard?
>>763571
>excuse you
Dawn, and just as radiant as one too.
>takes her hand
>Sin pls
>>763574
Do you?
No.763580
File: 1458791156794.jpg (484.52 KB, 1070x1642, 535:821, tumblr_nu7w9hWIUI1ufcfm2o1….jpg)
>>763573
....damn.
>>763576
I'm going to need that pizza Jack. Its uh...important.
No.763581
>>763578
I'm going to go ahead and assume it's magic.
>>763579
Yes.
>
...Kind of.
>
...Not really.
No.763582
File: 1458791244790.jpg (179.35 KB, 777x804, 259:268, 7a6e82ae3a30d1b1ca6fdcda5a….jpg)
>>763571
>has a fucking beard now
It's fine. I took the heat this time.
>>763577
Oh.
>Espeon just
>yanks it all off at once with TK
I'm too cold to feel right now.
No.763583
File: 1458791284540.jpg (199.22 KB, 850x1189, 850:1189, sample-7ef8f8841df7b1ae3dc….jpg)
>>763580
>"And you wouldn't stop wiping the glowstick stuff all over yourself and screaming "now I'm a parasite too, Charlene."''
No.763584
>>763579
...no, I guess not.
But that's hardly as dramatic.
>>763580
I'm saving it for a date, no way! It has all of my favorite toppings on it...Boss made it especially for me.
>grabs the box
No.763585
File: 1458791405376.jpg (62.55 KB, 564x542, 282:271, Implying the mets will eve….jpg)
>>763581
...you don't think I grabbed Doctor Strange's Big Gulp by accident, do you?
I was at a Mets game with him.
No.763586
>>763583
Who the hell is Charlene?
>>763584
Well if its for a date. Then your needs supercedes mine.
No.763587
>>763586
>Whoever she is, she sounds like she has problems
No.763588
File: 1458791543136.jpg (107.58 KB, 461x594, 461:594, tumblr_nxyt8vNMEy1r89rmlo1….jpg)
>>763581
Then you'll be happy to learn that the defendant can indeed counter-sue.
>makes a slam dunk motion
Game day bucket go swoosh, point to Sinbad.
>>763584
Aaaaaaaaaaaaand?
No.763589
>>763582
Jeez, you're crazy!
>Mudkip up
Scald!
>uh
Low temperature please.
>fwshhhhhhhhhh
No.763590
>>763586
Exactly.
You can have a slice but that's it.
>>763588
And what?
No.763591
>>763587
Well, next time don't let me take so many drugs. Apparently I can't handle them very well.
Although I'm not dead, so that bodes well for me.
>>763590
Well then slide me a slice. I'm starving.
No.763592
>>763589
>hurgleburgleblbrlbrblbrblrllb
...
>cough
No.763593
>>763591
>"Payback for letting Ocelot near me in 84."
>"Duh"
>"And no, we're not getting you more molly."
No.763594
>>763585
Did you check if he wrote his name on it anywhere?
>>763588
Congrats. You're not as braindead as I thought.
No.763595
>>763576
>is such a thing even possible
Oh, wow...why does he want to kill you?
>>763577
>I feel like I'm missing something
>but...they wouldn't lie to me, right
I didn't know you two went on a trip. What did you go for?
>>763579
>...o-oh
Thank you.
>sinks into her jacket collar
>this definitely isn't the guy Popeye wailed on
Are you a sailor...?
>>763582
>winces as the beard comes off
...you didn't have to do that.
No.763596
>>763592
Ta-dah! Good as new!
No.763597
>>763594
Nope.
Probably should've.
No.763598
>>763575
>In the cockpit Char sits Kiruko down in the pilot seat and sits off behind her in an instructors seat himself.
>He starts going over the Gelgoog flight manual with her
Alright so this is gonna' be long winded so I'm going to have the robot read this out loud and point at the pictures in the book over your shoulder like a flight attendant, okay?
>He pushes a few buttons and the cockpit hatch closes
>The presentation starts up
No.763599
>>763595
My journey's the shortest. Yours is long.
Be more careful.
>>763596
>
No.763600
>>763595
>oops
Adventure! Thrills! Really really good food!
I had to go there because...Prof. Birch was studying the local fossils, and ol' Red tagged along.
>>763599
>:3c
Isn't that right, Red.
No.763601
>>763598
>eeeeeee
Oohhh... it is like a big car?
No.763602
>>763595
>you question that but yet you're okay with the fact he threw it in there with his bare hands
Because he wanted to jumpstart the war economy the first time we met. I put a clear end to that, though.
This time he wanted to do that and jumpstart a new moat economy. Don't ask, long story. A long story I put an end to...
>>763591
>hands him a slice
There you go, now I better start saving the rest of this.
That's two slices already gone.
No.763603
>>763590
And exactly my point! Or something.
>>763594
Oh I see, if I'm not hiding in the dark all the time I must be stupid, eh?
I'll have you know you can be plenty stupid in the dark too. You could trip on something.
>>763595
>still got it, Sin
>stiiiiiiiiill got it
That I am, missy. The king of these here seven seas!
>studying her face
Ah, I've met that guy before. Probably thinks he won too, huh? Just because his breath stunk like spinach so much!
No.763604
File: 1458792217556.png (1.45 MB, 1366x768, 683:384, Metal_gear_venom_snake_leo….png)
>>763593
I don't want anymore.
All I want right now is food.
>>763602
A partial eaten pizza gives you the upper hand. She thinks that she took too long. She'll want to make it up to you. You have the power to dictate how the date goes from there.
Not in a creepy way though. Don't be a creep.
No.763605
>>763601
Heheh
>He pats her head and ruffles her hair
Kinda, like a car with fighter pilot controls.
>The narration begins:
>Part One. Control familiarization
>You are now sitting in the cockpit of the Duchy of Zeon Military Mobile Suit designation number MS-14JG, codename: Gelgoog Jaeger.
>This Mobile Suit is undeniably one of the Duchy's most advanced units. In front of you, the many monitors and controls are standard equipment for the second generation of production mobile suits. If you are able to pilot this Gelgoog, you will also be able to operate the MS-06F Zaku II and MS-09RII Rick Dom II.
>To begin, let's learn about the functions of the controls. First, the four directional monitors. Beginning with the head-mounted monoeye, 12 additional cameras mounted in various positions mounted on the body of the mobile suit provide video images. The perspective is set from the head level of the mobile suit, so the images represent a higher point of view than from the cockpit. In most combat situations, this shouldn't present a problem, but when in close combat with other mobile suits, you should raise your Mobile Suit's arms to avoid damage. Don't forget this! Your position in the cockpit is actually below the head. The cockpit is the most vital area in the mobile suit, so it is highly important that you remember this.
>Below the top monitor above your head there are two smaller monitors. The right monitor is used for communication, while the left monitor is a rear alert monitor. Inside the hangar, communication should be unaffected, but in space, minovsky particles may prevent images from displaying, even at short ranges. You may have to function from sound alone. The rear monitor will notify you with an audible alarm if an enemy maneuvers behind you. When you lose the feed from one of the external cameras, use the switches on the console on your right. In combat, if a camera is damaged, the feed can automatically be switched from this console.The next controls are the control sticks and pedals in the center of the cockpit. First, the sticks are responsible for controlling the vector of the Mobile Suit in flight. Additionally, the triggers and weapon select switches are also mounted here, which are vital in combat. The right pedal is the throttle, and the left pedal serves as the reverse thrust/brake. Since the Mobile Suit's movements are mostly controlled through the computer, basic movements are unchanged from combat. The stick and pedal controls are designed to be so simple that even a elementary school student can operate them.
Post last edited at
No.763606
>>763604
>"Don't give him bad advice."
No.763607
>>763597
Going to a Mets game with Strange doesn't even sound fun. I'll never understand people who get angry over sports games.
>this coming from a guy with severe anger issues
>>763603
Yeah, if you're uncoordinated.
No.763608
>>763607
He needed a mediator and I was the only one willing to go.
...if you value yourself, don't go if he ever calls you.
No.763609
>>763604
Hmmm I don't want to take advantage of her feeling bad.
I'd rather not. I already look enough like a creep.
>>763603
You're starting to not make sense again.
No.763610
>>763605
I was taught how to pilot fighters in Phantom.
So many cameras...
No.763611
>>763606
I said don't be a creep.
That's good advice.
Probably. I don't know. I haven't dated like a normal person since basic.
>>763609
Don't be overt about it. Just know that she'll be wanting to try harder to make up for making you wait for so long.
Even if she really isn't, if you think that's the case, it'll put you at ease, which means you won't be as nervous about the date.
No.763612
>>763600
It was a neat region.
>that's neither a yes or a no, Red
No.763613
File: 1458792671427.jpg (237.38 KB, 550x733, 550:733, fe942d81da34ee7d76447922bf….jpg)
>>763607
Not true! You could just be blind.
>>763609
Which probably means I'm losing magoi and need to go recharge.
>leans in
All's fair in love and war, but don't think you ever really have the upper hand. The woman is always right.
No.763614
File: 1458792696682.jpg (80.53 KB, 615x946, 615:946, 61a55c6fa697ae265478266614….jpg)
>>763611
>"It would be if you didn't make that face when you said it."
No.763615
>>763603
I thought Kyogre was the king of the seas...are you his Trainer?
>are you a Psychic type
How did you know-ah, never mind...
>>763599
>wait, what
...I...won't let it happen again.
>>763600
>but Professor Birch studies habitats, not fossils
>[suspicious]
...that's as good a reason as any. Did you find anything?
>>763602
>buddy you're talking to a little girl that hunts monsters, anything is possible
...moat economy.
>scratches her head
Well, as long as you stopped him. Is he in any more robots...?
No.763616
>>763610
Mmm-hmmm...
>Pointing at the pictures in the aged control manual on her lap and looking down her shirt
>Narrator: Part Two: Pre-launch sequence
>Now that you have some basic familiarity with the controls, let's get you out into space. Typically, you would report to the briefing room before launch to confirm mission details, but today we will skip this. First, sit in the seat and fasten your restraints, and begin the pre-flight check. Turn the generator switch (6) to the on position, and activate the warning monitor using the raised switch on the right of the panel (14). After this, activate the main computer and perform a function check.
>Typically we would not leave this up to the machine, and perform the check manually one hour before launch. Hey! There's a red light! Switch the monitor mode (4) and do a systems check! There's a problem with the Beam Machinegun control terminal connection. Let's call the maintenance crew over to check it out. Our flight checks will be last.
>OK, it looks like your machine is in good condition. Set the drive speed to 'Walk' using the speed mode selector (8), and slowly step down on the throttle (right pedal). The Mobile Suit will slowly start to move forward. If you step on the pedal strongly, the Mobile Suit will begin to run. Following the instructions of the Launch Officer, head towards the catapult. Turn using the directional control stick and release the throttle while stepping on the left brake pedal to stop.
>Once in position on the catapult, set the thrusters to idle.
>Set the speed mode selector/fuel control to 'Catapult launch' and release the throttle lock lever (11) and set it to the 'idle' position. At this level you should quickly check the warning monitor. If the fuel control is not set to 'idle', there may not be enough fuel to provide thrust. Next, move the throttle to the taxiing position. Thrusters are not usually used with the catapult, but in an emergency situation, they may be used together with the catapult. Now we are waiting for the catapult launch order from the Launch Officer.
>Once you receive permission to launch, release the brake, and the catapult will activate and you will be launched into space. If you try saying something like 'launching!' out loud, you'll probably bite your tongue.
>Using the control stick, move into formation with your unit. Try to use your Mobile Suit's inertia, and use your thrusters as little as possible. Try to locate your wingman's position beacon light while maintaining radio silence. In a normal mission, your flight path will be pre-programmed into your computer, so you shouldn't get lost, but in the worst case scenario, you can recheck your flight path using the index console and rendezvous with friendly forces.
No.763617
>>763613
Okay, I'll...keep that in mind.
>Everybody here gives awful advice, what would Snake say?
>"MEYRRRRRRRRRLLLLLLLLLLLL."
>Riiiiiight, even he would give awful advice.
>>763611
I wouldn't be nervous about it anyway, but I guess that kind of helps.
No.763618
>>763616
>Starts paying attention again
OH! Right - we will be taking an HLV to orbit soon to simulate our crash. I'll tell you about the HLV beore we get there.
No.763619
>>763608
The only one? You ever think you're too nice for your own good?
>>763613
Well, last I checked, I'm not blind.
>Listen to this guy: "The woman is always right." How much more pussy whipped could someone sound?
No.763620
>>763615
>except for uploading brains into robots apparently
No.
I got rid of them all.
No.763621
>>763612
You're liking your new friend, right?
>>763615
>it's okay I have a foolproof distraction
Fossils? No, the local team had stolen them all.
But look at this!
>bwomp
No.763622
File: 1458793022134.jpg (163.52 KB, 500x667, 500:667, Peter knows a lot of weird….jpg)
>>763619
I can't not be a nice guy, it's my thing. I'm the nice guy superhero.
No.763623
>>763614
I am a wealth of good advice. You want to make sure your blanket is nice and fluffy coming out of the dryer? Throw a tennis ball in there with it before you start the dryer.
>>763617
You're a Diamond Dog Jack. That means your a real catch. Any girl would be lucky to date you!
Also, try to find someone for Ocelot. He's getting cling again. I think.
I might have hallucinated him trying to hug me all the time.
No.763624
>>763616
This sounds like a lot but is not vury much.
>>763618
Ehh?
No.763625
File: 1458793171279.png (157.55 KB, 500x281, 500:281, tumblr_nywnnmz8oT1st6nrxo3….png)
>>763615
I read your waves.
>nodnod
They're a bit muddled, but the sea and people are waves alike. There's always a route.
>thinking
Kyogre...doesn't ring a bell, but if someone else is calling himself king of the seas, I'll have to see for myself!
>>763617
>snaps
Yes!
Don't let your dreams be dreams, Raiden.
>>763619
And that entitles you to not being stupid?
You sound like you're pretty far up that high horse.
No.763626
>>763621
>lifts his hat
>still under there
Kept me warm.
No.763627
File: 1458793295024.jpg (152.69 KB, 850x997, 850:997, sample-61ce42152967a760072….jpg)
>>763623
>"What about the same thing but this time without getting DD slobber all over your delicates."
>"I think he's getting mouth cancer, I'm the only one who remembers his Greenies"
No.763628
File: 1458793310350.jpg (192.82 KB, 600x663, 200:221, 1c8010187fa6bcdc02716c8dfd….jpg)
>>763615
>does she not know
>...oh, Ruby's distracting
Nuzlocke sends you on a journey to atone.
Don't worry about it.
No.763629
>>763622
I thought you were the self-conscious superhero that blames himself for everything that goes wrong.
>Moonman no
>there's keeping it real and then there's keeping it too real
>>763625
And if I am?
No.763630
>>763623
You really think so...? Means a lot coming from you, Boss. Thanks. Guess I should start thinking of myself as one...
And really, I don't think anybody out there exists for Ocelot. Unless she was like a literal walking revolver.
>>763625
I won't be, I'm done just dreaming!
No.763631
>>763629
And I thought you were the superhero that rips faces off while hearing voices in his head.
No.763632
>>763624
This mobile suit isn't capable of making it into orbit on its own so we're going to have to take a rocket big enough to get us there. Matter of fact, go ahead and walk us out of the hangar - I had Dren deliver a mobile launcher up the road.
>Narrator: Part Three: Combat sequence
>A warning indicator has appeared on the small warning panel (5). Your monoeye's Infrared sensors have picked up rocket exhaust plumes. Set the sensor mode to 'scan' (2). Your monoeye will automatically begin attempting to detect and track enemy targets.
>Again, your warning panel is signaling. The sensors have captured an enemy silhouette and displayed an enlarged picture on your main monitor. This is not a friendly unit; it's a Federation GM! This is an impossible situation for someone like you, with no combat experience.
>Switch from 'cruising' to 'combat' and move out of range of the enemy as fast as possible. You think running away is cowardly? There's not much you can do about it. I'll support you, so keep it together!
>Make sure you've set the speed selector/fuel control to 'combat maneuvering'. Set the combat mode selector to 'ranged combat'. Release the trigger lock and set the main monitor reticule to 'targeting'. You will see a symbol representing the enemy exhaust heat picked up by your sensors. Use the stick to line up the reticule with the symbol and... Lock on! Pull the trigger!
>You OK? Looks like the enemy shot first, and scored a hit on you. Check your Mobile Suit's status while simultaneously trying to reacquire the enemy unit. Looks like your right below the shoulder has been shot away, but no other malfunctions. The enemy Mobile Suit is closing on you! Switch to close combat mode on the combat mode selector, and use the index console to bring up the arm selection screen, and change to Beam Sword. You should be able to use the beam sword with your left arm after you do this. Alright! Full throttle! Three seconds should do it! If you overdo it, you'll run out of propellant quickly. In close combat mode, the right trigger will be used for the beam saber. It looks like the enemy has also drawn his beam saber.
>Act quickly and pull the trigger, and you might live. Good! The enemy's left arm came off! Do a barrel roll and hit the throttle, you've got to end this, attack again! WARNING! Pull up! 60mm vulcan fire! ...
>You idiot! You hit the throttle too hard and blacked out for a few seconds because of the high g-forces! You're lucky you didn't get shot in the meantime! The GM has escaped. Decrease speed and return to the flight path. Return the throttle to 'cruising' mode, check your propellant reserves, and check the overall status of the Mobile Suit. You've got a lot to do. Two apogee motors aren't responding? Try pressing the manual override switch. (13) If they're functioning normally, you should see a blue light, otherwise you'll see a red one. One looks like it's completely out of action. Okay, forget about it. The other apogee motors should suffice.
>Make the appropriate corrections to your programmed flight path, and limit your throttle to 50 percent, as you're running low on propellant. Keep your sensor mode on 'warning', as the enemy from before might still be out there somewhere. Once you've reached cruising speed, you should have sufficient inertia to keep moving, so set the throttle to 'idle'. That enemy from before didn't have a beam gun, so it must have lost it in another dogfight somewhere. That first vulcan strike must have caught you right on the shoulder joint. The Gelgoog is pretty well armored, but there are some areas which can't really take very much damage. You should also remember to aim for joints.
No.763633
>>763627
Dogs love dirty laundry. Its like DD is just waiting for me to take off my socks so he can pick em up and bring em right back to me.
>>763630
Damn.
Maybe we could just find him a new hobby then. He's spending too much time on base in his room watching westerns.
No.763634
File: 1458793678003.jpg (140.73 KB, 850x1236, 425:618, sample-b4b5cb76be0a407eb8f….jpg)
>>763633
>"Why do you bring him with you more than me again?"
No.763635
>>763620
>exactly
The world will be safe from robots digging moats to make money...
>>763621
>that's not even fair
>distracting someone with such a cute hat monster
...
>must
>maintain
>monotone
What is that.
>>763625
>well yeah every sea has a route
>Especially in Hoenn
You can see what people are thinking from their waves? Wow...
>pulls out her Pokedex and brings up the whale god's page
This. Maybe it's asleep again, though...
No.763636
>>763632
Hokay!
>pedaling intensifies
This say person pass out from g-forces, I donut think I need to worry much.
No.763637
>>763626
You'll have to give me the summary sometime!
>>763635
A Capig! It's like the Zigzagoon or Bidoof of the region we went to.
The locals have used these guys to stay warm for centuries, they even make all their hats look the same as they do!
>snuffling hat hamster noises
Watch him for me? If Kyogre's back I better reign him in while I still have time.
>waves and darts off
No.763638
>>763631
>sighs
I only ripped off someone's face once.
No.763639
File: 1458793922422.png (636.54 KB, 756x584, 189:146, mgr_r___raiden_screenart_b….png)
>>763633
Really? I always see him at the gun range.
He spends too much time there.
I think the soldiers are starting to feel uneasy each time they go there.
>>763635
>i ain't following
It was more than just a moat, it was gonna be a moat where people would have to die just to live here! A moat where more people just like those cyborgs would be made...but hey, I'm not gonna monologue about it, that'd be insane.
No.763640
>>763629
Then I bid you a good day sir but I don't think we have anything more to say to each other.
>>763630
That's the way!
>>763635
>?
>peeking over
>man I can't read this sheet
Big and blue...
>!
Hey, that kid better not get in the way!
>chases after Ruby
No.763641
>>763635
>gee thanks kouhai
>puts hatmon on her head
Ruby'll be back.
>>763637
>waves him off before shooting him the "we need to talk" look
No.763642
>>763638
And it'll stick with you for the rest of your life.
No.763643
>>763640
>shakes his head
Idiot...
>>763642
Only because everyone else won't get over it.
No.763644
>>763634
You saying I don't take you on enough missions?
>>763639
I heard a rumor he's been at the gun range in just his underwear, a bathrobe and boots.
No.763645
>>763643
It's your defining moment, how could they?
No.763646
>>763645
>frown
I'd point out what your defining moment is, but that'd be a low blow.
No.763647
File: 1458794299475.png (210.65 KB, 900x626, 450:313, Raiden looks as angry as a….png)
>>763644
Those aren't just rumors...
>>763640
There he goes...
That weirdo.
No.763648
>>763636
Me either!
>Gets brave
>Pulls a melon-bun from her cleavage while her hands are occupied with the driving controls
>Narration continues on the side-screen:
>Part Four: Ejection system
>Upon pulling the ejection handle, the chest armor over the cockpit will swing up, and all the air in the cockpit will escape almost instantly, so it's a good idea to always keep your helmet visor closed. The ejection systems will the eject the seat within .25 seconds. During this time, the maximum acceleration will be 16G, and the rocket motors on the ejection seat will fire for no longer than 30 seconds total, so 5 seconds after ejection, you will be approximately one kilometer away from the Mobile Suit, so you won't have to worry about being caught in the explosion of your Mobile Suit.
>However, you must be careful as to not move too far outside the operational radius of friendly forces when in space combat. To this end, the seat is equipped with apogee motors that can be controlled with the flight stick. The life support systems, emergency communications, and rescue beacon are all powered by both a battery in the seat as well as solar panels.
>The seat is also equipped with air tanks, food, water, a signal gun, and a grappling wire launcher. After ejecting and activating the emergency beacon, there isn't much to do except wait. While there is 5 days worth of air, food and water supplies are limited to three days, so you must be remain calm and wait for rescue by friendly forces. If there is any propellant left in your apogee motors, you should try to get closer to any rescue units.
Oh ignore what it's saying about only five days supply. That's if you eject. The mobile suit itself has storage for food below the chair. I'm not entirely sure where it is if your unit's equipped with the Mobile Trace system like yours will be.
>If you do not have much air left, do not panic. Rescue forces are well aware of your situation are will be working with all haste to try and recover you as soon as possible. You should also accept the possibility of rescue from enemy forces as well. It is the duty of rescuers to save all living survivors, regardless of affiliation. The treatment of prisoners of war is well documented under the Antarctic treaty, and the number of prisoners is not small.
>So far we have discussed ejection in outer space, so let's cover ejection inside colonies, on the Moon, or on Earth. Near the rotational axis of colonies the artificial gravity will be weaker, so you may find yourself engaged in air-to-air combat inside colonies. In this situation, you can use the apogee motors to land on the surface of a colony, or if not, it may be possible to maintain position on the axis of the colony for a extended period. However, due to the presence of atmosphere and air pressure, you must take extra caution not to get caught in the explosion of your Mobile Suit. On the surface of the Earth or Moon, you must immediately find cover after the seat lands, as the range of the ejection system will be reduced, so you must carefully consider your distance from your Mobile Suit after ejection.
No.763649
>>763646
Hey, least she died at the hands of a super villain instead of running away after seeing me playing pretend in the mirror.
No.763650
File: 1458794558666.jpg (151.62 KB, 566x800, 283:400, 3d8f00e5e6bf4f7c1845a25779….jpg)
>>763648
I will just have to store food in my secret place.
>Kiru no that sounds lewd as fuck
>!
Oi! Where are you putting hand?
>hands still on the controls
No.763651
>>763649
>shrugs
Looking back on it, I'm pretty sure my first girlfriend was a gold digger anyway.
>is he being honest or just being salty
>probably both
No.763652
>>763651
Well look on the bright side, you're getting married soon!
...I never ever thought I'd ever say that.
No.763654
>>763652
You're still surprised about that, huh.
No.763655
File: 1458794954178.jpg (77.61 KB, 917x870, 917:870, raiden__metal_gear_rising_….jpg)
>>763653
Yeeeaaah, I think he's gone a bit loopy after the events of 2014.
Hypnotizing himself so much can't be good for his mind.
No.763656
File: 1458794956450.gif (1011.72 KB, 500x276, 125:69, oh wow i uhh need to cool ….gif)
>>763650
>Wew!
Couldn't resist.
...
Secret place, huh?
>Wiggling his eyebrows
Where might that be?
>Narrator finally finishes his spiel:
>Part Five: Return and landing sequence
>Finally, your mission is complete. You have managed to bring your scarred Mobile Suit all the way back to your base ship. You should be able to identify any malfunctions by checking to see that none of the warning lights are active.
>Communication has also been established, and the Landing Officer will notify you of your landing status, and direct you to land on the base ship.
>Oh, I see, you can't do it, huh? Fine, let's just start up the campfire and wait for rescue.
Heheh I'll show you how to start a campfire on Mars when we land.
>Ha! I told you that you'd be able to land under your own power. So stubborn... After landing on the deck, activate the foot magnets, and set your speed to 'walk', and reduce the throttle to idle. Once you arrive in the hangar, set the mode to 'maintenance'. This will automatically cut the thrusters and lock the speed mode selector. Finally, power down the generator and disembark your Mobile Suit.
>Congratulations.
>You came back alive. Good job.
Post last edited at
No.763657
File: 1458795016402.jpg (107.53 KB, 1173x400, 1173:400, The time Spidey was a litt….jpg)
>>763654
There will never be a time when I'm not.
No.763658
>>763656
This nurrator is vury cheeky.
>she's dodging the question
>clearly it's her cleavage pocket
No.763659
>>763658
Totally! That's this mobile suit's AI voice.
Alright so go ahead and climb into that thing there.
>Points at the HLV
It's a Heavy Lift Vehicle or HLV for short.
>The cheeky narrator sees that the HLV is targeted on her screen for the first time
>Would you like a tutorial?
>A reusable vehicle designed to transport cargo between Earth and space. The HLV's streamlined shape allows it to survive atmospheric re-entry and, after being fitted with rocket boosters, it can then be launched back into orbit. During the One Year War, these vessels were used by the Principality of Zeon to land forces on Earth, to launch extracted mineral resources into space, and then finally to evacuate fleeing troops.
No.763660
>>763657
Aw, c'mon. You'll get over it eventually.
No.763661
>>763660
No, no even at the wedding I'll be like, "I can't believe this is happening."
No.763662
>>763659
Ruger!
>struggles with the entry, getting used to the mobile suit
>tfw one eye
>tfw visual feed isn't exact
No.763663
>>763661
Knowing you, you'll just be saying that over and over throughout the whole ceremony.
No.763664
>>763663
It'll be my catchphrase for the event! Anytime somebody talks to me, the first thing I'll say is, "I can't believe this is happening!"
No.763665
>click click
>...
>click
>stumbles up from a computer, bleary eyed
Coffee...
>pouring some out of the pot
>it comes out in a solid mass
Christ.
No.763666
>>763664
Still a better catchphrase than "Wallopin' websnappers!"
No.763667
>>763665
>
This is unacceptable! Who leaves a coffee machine like this?
>reeeeeee it's filthy
No.763668
>>763662
>tfw proud of her for getting the hang of it so quickly
>tfw enjoying watching her bounce around in the pilot seat as she crams the robot into the space pod.
Alright now that the mobile suit's seated in the capsule go ahead and hit that orange button there when you're ready to launch.
>Grins
Wanna' start off the countdown?
No.763669
>>763666
>whatever you say, Satan
In what way?
No.763670
File: 1458796029718.jpg (274.19 KB, 850x1203, 850:1203, sample-718e218a614d36d95ba….jpg)
>>763667
Wouldn't that be the maid in charge of cleaning said pot.
Relax, we have instant.
>holds her hand out
>fresh steaming coffee drops out of a wormhole
>ssssssssip
There we go...
No.763671
Is anyone playing Teddie or Igor from Persona? Just wondering.
No.763672
>>763670
I sincerely hope you are not saying this is my doing, miss Bala. I take my job very seriously!
>blink
>wat
What-
No.763673
>>763669
>I have no idea what you're talking about
>there is absolutely no soul-stealing going on at the moment
It's nowhere near as cheesy.
No.763674
File: 1458796192373.jpg (309.38 KB, 708x1000, 177:250, 482a377e06d4e94c695abfad43….jpg)
>>763668
How long was countdown again?
No.763675
>>763671
This is something for the fanclub thread stickied.
No.763676
File: 1458796225220.jpg (136.27 KB, 691x800, 691:800, f03eddd7f61e1bb5673cd0e187….jpg)
>>763671
no and no
>>763672
Maids clean dirty coffee machines, no?
>points
And that right there is one dirty coffee machine. Let's just-
>dumps a vial of lye in the pot
>sizzling
What?
>looks down at the coffee
...Oh shit.
No.763677
>>763673
Now that's assuming a bit much.
No.763678
>>763673
>I saw those digits, dark lord
>you can't hide from me
What's wrong with cheesy?
Cheesy is good!
No.763679
>>763676
Everything was spotless when I left it this morning. This is just unacceptable.
>just
>pretend you didn't see anything mini
No.763680
>>763679
Well now we can't have that, can we.
Anyone would seek to stand in the way of my maid's just stands in the way of me and my clean coffee. And that's just unacceptable.
>lye dropping out of more wormholes into the collection of mugs next to the pot
Heads up, try not to breathe over here until say next Tuesday,
No.763681
>>763677
>blink
>blink
Where did you come fr- oh, right, omnipresence.
>>763678
Yeah, well, people say too much of a good thing is bad for you.
No.763682
File: 1458796665295.jpg (65.68 KB, 430x607, 430:607, c2a5fd7e538d4351a1a38fdd3e….jpg)
>>763680
>just
I cannot ignore this any longer. What are those.
No.763683
>>763681
It certainly has its perks.
Why wait in line when you can make the line not exist and never have existed for all time.
I don't take souls, by the way.
No.763684
>>763681
Wallopin' websnappers is just the right amount of cheese, though.
No.763685
>>763674
Usually 10 seconds.
But if you like it fast and hard you can launch any time you like.
>Seatbelts himself in.
No.763686
>>763682
>?
>looks down
Those are heels, Fabiola. The same ones I've been wearing for years now.
>scratching at one
...Nail polish is starting to wear off, might be time to get some new ones.
I thought you were better than that, falling prey to meemees.
No.763687
>>763685
音無キルコ、発射！
>button slammed down
No.763688
>>763686
You made the acid come out of thin air!
No.763689
>>763683
Can you blame me for getting confused? There's more misinformation about you floating around than anyone else I can think of.
>>763684
It would be, if we were still living in the '60s.
No.763690
File: 1458797000015.jpg (344.12 KB, 880x692, 220:173, tumblr_m6rbe7hpQv1qhrxcso1….jpg)
>>763688
>frown
>cheek: pinched
I've been editing porn for the last 13 hours straight.
Needless to say my patience for lies is at an all time low.
No.763691
>>763689
No, but if I chose to I could blame you for being lazy and having your information you decided to choose from presented to you in convenient little packets.
You can't believe everything you read, not even the Word.
No.763692
>>763690
>[M A D]
>hefts the bacon
We are going to the security room to see footage! I will not be called a liar!
No.763693
>>763689
Alright, what's acceptable cheese to you, then?
No.763694
No.763695
>>763687
>Rumbling
WEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!
>WOOSH!!
No.763697
File: 1458797356090.png (379.76 KB, 755x556, 755:556, tumblr_mg5xhfGSUr1qcabtmo1….png)
>>763692
>hup
Maybe it hasn't dawned on you yet how tired I am of seeing computer screens right now.
>just plants a heel into the floor
>snap
>falls back into mini
Rrrrr...
No.763699
>>763697
>[ANGRY MINIMAID INTENSIFIES]
I will not have the quality of my work questioned, and I will not have my character stained with lies!
No.763700
File: 1458797491010.jpg (559.12 KB, 920x1036, 230:259, White suit with a bag on h….jpg)
>>763691
My dad was a rabbi, being force-fed religious dogma was pretty hard to avoid.
>shrug
He wasn't that convincing, though.
>>763693
I don't do cheesy, Spider-Man. I haven't for a long time.
No.763702
>>763700
Well I'm sorry for having fun.
No.763703
File: 1458797603233.jpg (173.22 KB, 728x438, 364:219, this is her extremely exci….jpg)
>>763698
Oooooh
>>763701
>SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE
No.763704
>>763699
>MENACING levels up 2
You're shouting in my ear, Miss Iglesias.
>oh no she's using the last name
No.763705
>>763700
No, there were far more pressing voices, weren't there.
No.763706
>>763704
>REEEEEEEE
>also she's holding Bala over her head like Mario holds vegetables
I will not suffer slander, miss Bala! There are many tings dat I will tolerate, baht not dat!
>the accent's flaring up
No.763707
>>763702
You should be. Didn't you see the "No Fun Allowed" sign outside?
>>763705
...That's one way of putting it.
>Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain!
No.763708
>>763707
>holding the sign
What sign?
No.763709
>>763703
>Suddenly the engine cuts off
>Loud thunk as the boosters fall off and the capsule flies free into orbit
>No gravity!!
>WEE!!
Congratulations! You got yourself to orbit for the first time!
Great job! Now we've got about 20 minuets to kill before the pod makes a rough landing in Utah for our camping trip. Whatcha wanna' do?
No.763710
>>763706
>not even really paying attention
>loud maid is normal fare
It's not like my ass was already sore from sitting in a chair for so long or anything.
>taptap
I might as well humor you if it stops this. Just mind all the oddly wet brooms in that closet.
No.763711
>>763707
I'm considering just removing that pest.
No.763712
>>763709
>
>the HYPE levels are off the charts Char
This is great! It is like swimming with no water in my ears!
No.763713
>>763708
The one in your hands, obviously.
>>763711
I don't blame you, but considering there's a chance I might disappear with him, I'd prefer if you didn't.
No.763714
>>763710
>rrrrRRRRRR
>door shut with one of her feet
>rewinding camera feed
>fucking wormholes how do they work
What are those?!
No.763715
>>763713
I think you're forgetting who you're talking to.
No.763716
File: 1458798387195.png (345.3 KB, 850x438, 425:219, 26297ba363594550ae5c4b1648….png)
>>763714
>leans in
>staring
>staring
You can put me down now, you know.
>Bala please just answer the question
No.763717
>>763713
Well tonight this sign goes out the window.
Literally.
>throws it out the window
No.763718
>>763712
Heh
>Unlatches his seat belt and freefloats
>Helmet off
>Golden locks flow like a shampoo commercial
No.763719
>>763716
Answer the question!
>still fuming
>Mini please calm down
No.763721
File: 1458798681347.png (340.65 KB, 650x584, 325:292, tumblr_nxv3cw2nGT1qblq2no1….png)
>>763719
I guess we're playing hardball, then.
>crams the debuff rune in her mouth
>Stechkin to her temple
It hurts me more than you know to have to do this.
I will not be shouted at. Understand me.
>do you see the bags under her eyes, mini
...Wormholes.
No.763722
>>763720
>Smiles
>Reaches down and unlatches her safety belt, setting her in free float with him
No.763723
>>763721
>Bala you idiot she was holding you
>and now they both come tumbling down
>squished under the bacon
No.763724
>>763715
Kinda hard to forget someone like you, Lucifer.
>tapping his foot anxiously
If you want him gone, go ahead. Just make sure I'm still here afterwards.
>Whoa, whoa, whoa! Can't we talk about this?
>>763717
>SPIDEY, YOU FOOL
>YOU'VE DISRUPTED THE NATURAL ORDEEEEER!
...That takes care of that, I guess.
No.763725
>>763722
You get to do this all the time?
No.763726
File: 1458798979110.jpg (62.61 KB, 600x847, 600:847, tumblr_nv3fqcZFXv1r0h614o1….jpg)
>>763723
>oh
>wait-
>wump
...That wasn't as threatening as I would have liked.
>pulls mini's head out of her chest with a cartoonish sound effect
Satisfied?
No.763727
>>763724
Yeah, now I get t--
>sign boomerangs back in and hits Spider's head
>CLONK
Hey!
No.763728
>>763725
>He nods as she floats into his arms
Yep!
I have a robot that can shape itself like a space-plane and reach orbit with scramjets so I usually don't take a rocket but yes for some suits - all the time.
No.763729
>>763726
>guh
Why did you make me go through all that trouble if you knew the answer?
No.763730
>>763724
Let's make one thing clear, shall we.
I don't do things for the benefits of others. I didn't two million years ago and I don't plan to start anytime soon. This is just all just a formality.
>snaps
>have an empty head, moonman
>and a fracture in your foot you can actually feel
But that's just rude no matter how you look at it.
No.763731
>>763728
And now I get to do this all the time?
No.763732
No.763733
No.763734
>>763729
Because nobody wants to relive Hell.
>and then it alllllllll started coming back to her
>the Walker Gears
>the wormholes
>the clouds of bullshit science
>aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
No.763735
>>763731
As long as you want.
... I was under the impression you were only looking for something temporary.
No.763737
>>763727
>chuckles
Looks like your Spider-Sense failed again.
>>763730
>Wait, stop! It's just a prank, br-
>pop
It's not like I asked you t- Oww...
No.763738
>>763735
>UH
Yes, only temporary. I am just vury excited to be here.
No.763739
>>763736
>...did I really see him back then in that stupid hat
>Christ
Elaborate.
No.763740
>>763739
You knew and you still called me a liar!
No.763741
>>763737
You don't understand, this isn't your average everyday sign.
This is an advanced sign.
No.763742
>>763737
You're assuming it would have made a difference.
I have what I want, a pleasure doing business.
No.763744
>>763740
Don't you think you should be appreciating the situation a bit more.
>obviously repressing that shit, mini
>come on now
>>763743
No...no...no...
No.763745
>>763738
>Very close
Well if you ever change your mind I can arrange something more permanent for you any time.
No.763748
File: 1458799899325.png (876.63 KB, 484x1075, 484:1075, Leaving Iron Fist speechle….png)
>>763741
...What the hell does that mean?
>>763742
Well... thanks, I guess. Now I won't have to worry about Khonshu cracking jokes throughout my wedding like he's part of the Mystery Science Theater crew.
No.763749
>>763745
>woah okay real close
Um... maybe wait until I actually do the job?
No.763750
>>763746
>man I just wanted some coffee after a porn session
Be honest with me.
We had absolutely no chance in Kabul, did we.
>>763747
>security needed
>'mere
I don't say this a lot so listen closely.
>guh
Izvinite.
No.763751
>>763748
It means it's probably cursed or something.
No.763752
>>763748
Oh, don't thank me
>gone
No.763753
File: 1458800160999.jpg (117.7 KB, 1024x794, 512:397, big_boss__mg2_solid_snake_….jpg)
>>763750
>i'm not even really here
>this is what happens when you repress shit
>appreciate the beret and fatigues though
>classy
What chance was there, Kapitan, against the man who sold the world?
No.763754
>>763751
Maybe Strange cursed it as revenge for you taking his Big Gulp cup.
>>763752
...I just realized something. If I understand the family tree correctly, I'm gonna wind up being in-laws with the devil himself.
>tilts his head
Huh.
No.763755
>>763750
>
>stuffed animal mode go
No.763756
>>763749
>Jolly spacenoid laugh
Nonsense! Have faith in yourself. you'll have that asteroid belt case wrapped up in no time, I'm sure of it.
No.763758
File: 1458800425620.jpg (86.01 KB, 550x755, 110:151, 058b244ebbec5bd572d98fe652….jpg)
>>763753
>swear to god if those three ghosts come back too
>fucking Ghost of Bacon Past
Could you blame us for wanting to deprive you of a world to sell.
We Russians aren't known for being good losers.
>>763755
>squeeze
Better have some of that coffee yourself.
No.763759
File: 1458800479346.jpg (131.77 KB, 680x894, 340:447, Spidey, you are an awful c….jpg)
>>763754
You think so? You might be right. Maybe I should return this this...
>looks at the cup
No.763760
>>763759
You probably should. Strange might wind up making "Parker Luck" a thing again if you don't.
No.763761
File: 1458800695113.png (152.04 KB, 292x427, 292:427, I'm pretty fucking sure it….png)
>>763760
Before I return it, there's just one more thing I want to do with it...
No.763762
>>763758
Learned that from Volgin.
Bottling up the stupid things leads to episodes like this, you know.
Now stop staring at me, I'm not even really here. The maid's getting worried.
>wisps away
No.763763
>>763761
About that... don't.
No.763764
>>763756
It did not sound hard.
No.763765
>>763758
Miss Bala? You should get some sleep.
No.763766
File: 1458800880114.png (2.06 MB, 1960x653, 1960:653, One big fuck you to Moon K….png)
>>763763
What?
>takes the cup
>takes a nice and ordinary sip
>not even slightly obnoxious
No.763767
Oh I've always loved Snapple. It's sweet. But no too sweet. And refreshing? Oh ho ho. I think so.
No.763768
>>763766
>this confuses the Moon Knight
Oh. Never mind.
No.763769
>>763762
>blink
Was I just scolded by the ghost of a guy who isn't even dead yet.
That's just embarrassing, I won't lie.
>>763765
But I learned so much.
>guh
Sleep won't hand over all I want to take from it.
>sticks a pin in mini's jacket
>Hotel Moscow: Green Squad
No.763771
>>763767
While you drink your very delicious and available for only $0.99 per bottle Snapple I, Zorak, will enjoy some Mentos.
Mentos. The Fresh Maker.
No.763773
File: 1458801187333.jpg (21.68 KB, 160x271, 160:271, Nigga, is you Spider-Serio….jpg)
>>763768
Sheesh, what's your problem?
No.763774
>>763771
Mentos? Why Zorak! Nothing gives you the cool, refreshing confidence quite like a Mentos.
No.763775
>>763764
Exactly!
>Warning bells go off
Alright time to strap back in we're gonna' land.
No.763777
File: 1458801317397.jpg (115.4 KB, 838x1280, 419:640, cf61b85b0d610280e057fe30f4….jpg)
>>763775
Right!
>back into the pilot seat she goes
No.763779
>>763774
Yes it'll allow me to crack that whip,Space Ghost.
Speaking of which I enjoy the fine sounds of Devo, available on iTunes, while enjoying Mentos.
No.763780
File: 1458801416927.png (682.84 KB, 670x468, 335:234, And then I have to reverse….png)
>>763773
I thought you were gonna try and annoy me to death again.
No.763781
>>763777
>The capsule comes for a rough landing
>BOOM!!
No.763782
File: 1458801450350.jpg (234.37 KB, 1280x854, 640:427, tumblr_migf49jSC01rf19b8o1….jpg)
>>763772
This is my idea of fun, alright.
>there's a little green silhouette of a bowl cut on it
I've got a Metal Gear and four supersoldiers with a common motif, might as well look nice while we're tumbling down the hole to becoming Big Boss.
No.763783
>>763780
Naaaaah that's outplayed.
Almost too easy too.
No.763784
>>763779
I also like Devo Zorak. I listen to them on my Zune
No.763785
>>763784
Zune?
I thought we were receiving checks from-- I mean supporters of iTunes.
No.763786
File: 1458801738939.jpg (345.6 KB, 719x1000, 719:1000, f596ce548010e609146d356464….jpg)
No.763787
>>763783
Good. Less problems for me.
No.763788
>>763782
Miss Amanda's soldier friend?
No.763790
>>763785
I forgot the iTunes password. All I have left is my zune. My zune will keep me warm
No.763791
>>763789
I hit my head, but I am okey.
No.763792
>>763787
Exactly.
Consider it a wedding gift.
No.763794
>>763790
...then make a new account?
No.763795
File: 1458801928840.jpg (189.59 KB, 850x1201, 850:1201, sample-076de53805d75614334….jpg)
>>763788
More than that, but I figure he toots his own horn enough as it is.
>now I gotta find me a Walker Gear
>maybe in a museum
Where's she been, anyhow. Thought you'd like to keep someone around you can speak Spanish with.
No.763796
>>763794
The computer is dead.
Somebody kept googling Hot Mantises In Your Area
No.763797
>>763792
You're not just saying that because you're too lazy to find a real gift, right?
No.763798
>>763791
Good good. Alright - so first order of business on Mars camp:
Set up camp!
The easiest way to do this is to use the mobile suit and make a "cave."
Draw the beam saber and carve out a hole under us, but make sure it's not big enough for the robot to enter! The opening should only be about as wide as the robots fore-arm.
No.763799
>>763796
Right yeah I bet it was...Moltar.
No.763800
>>763797
No I just have no idea what I'd get you.
No.763801
>>763795
She is fighting for Nica still.
No.763802
>>763799
I thought it'd be funny!
No.763803
>>763799
Zorak. Our Sponsors don't like it when you lie. They say it taints the endorsement.
No.763804
File: 1458802272780.png (456.96 KB, 850x1000, 17:20, 6ea5d4f0cc8e6b188a14907f1b….png)
>>763798
Hokay.
>weapons switch go
>beam saber selected
>carving a hole a little bigger than intended
No.763805
>>763801
We'll just see what we can do about setting her up.
With a discount, of course.
>tucks the meido under her arm
Let's go. I want to get through most of my list before I pass out.
No.763806
>>763802
Well it's not so funny when it ends up breaking our computer!
Besides, is the sex of my people really that amusing to you?
>>763803
I'm not lying, though!
I only searched it like...3 times!
No.763807
File: 1458802342823.jpg (220.34 KB, 757x900, 757:900, Now where did that blood c….jpg)
>>763800
What do you get for the guy who has everything, right?
>taps his foot
Eh, gifts don't really matter to me. Sign an autograph for my kid and we'll call it good.
No.763808
>>763806
No, I thought it'd be pictures of mantises covered in lava.
And it's payback for taking my Twinkie from the break room.
No.763809
File: 1458802389440.png (69.26 KB, 262x543, 262:543, DO NOT SCRUFF THE MINI MAI….png)
>>763805
>scruffed
Why do you always carry me like this?
No.763810
>>763807
I forgot you had a kid!
Alright, that's easy for me. Maybe I'll get the others to do it too.
No.763811
File: 1458802432410.jpg (15.96 KB, 236x342, 118:171, b09679494f2e41b0aaa06dc06b….jpg)
>>763806
Zorak. God is watching. God knows when you are not telling the truth. God knows 7 Sexy Ways to Keep Your Man Begging For More
No.763812
Alright, now go around the other side and mound up about 5 meters of dirt, compress it, and then put the beamsaber through it all the way into the cavity you hollowed out earlier
No.763813
No.763814
>>763812
All the way?
>following instructions as best she can
No.763815
File: 1458802549330.png (180.93 KB, 500x697, 500:697, d1d2b5a000aa6a0b47dec1ac70….png)
>>763809
You're four feet tall, if you can find me an easier way to carry you I'm all ears.
It's like having a cat that gets angry for no reason and makes bodily threats.
...So yeah, a cat.
No.763816
>>763808
I didn't see your name on i--
Wait were you searching for hot mantis on lava person action?
>>763811
I don't believe in God, my people have a religion of their own.
We believe in the 3 Mantislords of the Beginning. The three of them gave us the three things we needed to really live...
They gave us water, they gave us air, and then they gave us sex.
No.763817
>>763810
I feel bad, honestly. I really don't do enough for him. But kids like superheroes, so if you got other people involved... that'd be nice.
No.763818
>>763816
Pfff, no.
I was searching for just lava on mantis people.
Here, watch.
>pulls lever
>
Hehehehehehe.
No.763819
>>763816
God is real Zorak. God knows the Six Simple Steps To Sexy Abs. God will teach us. God teaches us all.
>holding an issue of Cosmo
No.763820
>>763817
I'll see what I can do. Shouldn't be too hard to get most of them to sign.
No.763821
>>763814
Yep. That's good!
Now, go back around to the first hole and sit the mobile suit on it. There is an auxiliary hatch in the robots butt that we can access from the maintenance tubes.
But first, dump an auxiliary air tank through the bottom airlock. This will fill the chamber you made with breathable air. The 2nd hole you made will act as ventilation for our camp fire!
No.763822
No.763825
>>763821
Ehh... how do I dump the tank?
No.763826
>>763819
Stop disrespecting my religioooooooooon!
>>763818
>coated in lava
>
You must be getting your rocks off to this I bet.
No.763828
File: 1458803008491.jpg (106.22 KB, 400x577, 400:577, 4850f3d6ef26051aa497882cce….jpg)
No.763829
>>763826
See, this is why I'm an agnostic.
Nothing bad ever happens to agnostics.
No.763830
File: 1458803071750.jpg (37.37 KB, 457x500, 457:500, gelgoog_mass_production_ty….jpg)
>>763825
>Leans over her shoulder, pointing
That switch there and then poke at the butt area on picture of the robot on the touch panel on your left there.
No.763831
>>763826
Your religion is weird and doesn't provide answers! My God does. My God is a guide to the Cosmos!
No.763832
>>763820
>smile
Thanks, Pete. I owe you one.
No.763833
>>763829
Oh so you're the kind of person who can't make up their damn mind on what they want to worship.
That's so you, Moltar.
>>763831
Gimme that!
>grabs the magazine
7 Ways to Woo Your Man in Bed?
I didn't know you rolled that way.
No.763834
>>763828
>???????
I do not understand your request.
No.763835
File: 1458803278297.jpg (277.1 KB, 1214x597, 1214:597, I'd so go to that goth chi….jpg)
>>763832
It's the least I could do! Speaking of the others, I better get home! See ya later, Moon Knight!
>swings away
No.763837
>>763833
Look, I'm just saying the universe is too big for any of us to really know what's going on.
If I find enough proof, I might change my mind.
And agnostics still get to go to Heaven because we're just confused sheep.
Plus the Agnostics Anonymous girl was smokin'
No.763838
>>763833
I didn't even know girls liked to do things like that.
Now maybe I can learn how to meet a cute girl without being weird about it
No.763839
>>763834
Cats meow, don't they?
I want you to meow.
No.763840
>>763835
>chuckles
Have a nice night, webslinger.
No.763841
>>763837
Woooow did I ask you to explain your reasoning?
Trying to justify your own terrible decisions despite nobody asking...
That's so you, Moltar.
>>763838
You were always a weirdo with the ladies, remember when you literally went out with a sign looking for a free girlfriend? Or that time at the diner where you followed that midget?
No.763842
>>763841
I'M A VERY PUT TOGETHER INDIVIDUAL, ZORAK
No.763843
>>763839
But I am a person!
No.763844
>>763836
Alright space suit on and we'll crawl out the robots butt and take a look at your handywork.
>He opens a compartment on the chair and pulls out a space suit and helmet for her
>Watches her suit up
>The suit is a little small for her chest
No.763845
>>763841
She wasn't a midget Zorak. She was just Asian.
And I used to be very smooth with the ladies. They once called me Space Guapo.
That means Handsome Man of Space.
No.763846
>>763842
Calm down, nobody said you weren't!
Sheesh, you get insulted at the drop of a hat. Who are you trying to impress?
>>763845
Asian, midget, they all look the same to me.
And they called you Space Guano you idiot. That means Bat Shit of Space.
No.763847
>>763843
Point of fact, I was going to let you say it now and we could just go to bed, it sounds like a nice enough prospect at the moment.
But now I'm going to make you.
>plops mini on a couch
>incoming bacon
No.763848
>>763846
Your mom.
She said I could do better for myself that one time she visited.
We're Skype friends.
No.763849
>>763847
But it is embaras--eep!
>bolts
>minimaid a quick
No.763850
File: 1458804115746.jpg (15.96 KB, 236x342, 118:171, b09679494f2e41b0aaa06dc06b….jpg)
>>763846
Thats speciest Zorak. Don't be that bug.
>>763848
Moltar I thought I told you the Skype account is for interviews only. How can we talk to our guests with you hogging the line to talk to Zoraks Mom?
No.763851
No.763852
>>763848
Ew, you know my mother?
And you use Skype? Only antisocial no lives use that. Either that or people too busy with a real job to actually have friends to physically talk to.
>>763850
It's not speciest if it's true!
Asians are short! They're like bite sized where I come from.
No.763853
>>763844
>chest squished
Oof...
No.763854
File: 1458804346912.jpg (77.34 KB, 961x533, 961:533, tumblr_m2jqe5pGYt1qk3lu6o1….jpg)
>>763849
Well now.
I suppose the hunt is on.
>smashes the other stiletto on her heel
Let's see if my tracking skills are rusty.
>charges after
No.763855
>>763854
Noooooo! I do not want to be sat on!
No.763856
>>763850
What guests, we haven't had a guest more relevant than Carrot Top in ages.
I was giving her my recipe for peach pie. That's classified stuff.
>>763852
Well I have my cave.
So little column A, little of column B
No.763857
>>763853
Alright let's go.
>He pulls a panel off the wall behind the pilot's seat and motions her to crawl in
No.763858
File: 1458804518690.jpg (93.37 KB, 483x396, 161:132, bludgeoning angel dokuro-c….jpg)
>>763857
Eh?
>peeks her head down in the tunnel down
No.763860
>>763855
>DOUBLE SPEED BALA
It's бесполезный! бесполезный! бесполезный!
No.763861
>>763860
AAAAAAAAAAAA!
>bookin it
No.763863
>>763856
So you admit to be an anti-social shut in with a job that sucks the life out of him?
No.763864
File: 1458804961656.jpg (105.64 KB, 709x422, 709:422, tumblr_np79xzqJA11uwlss4o1….jpg)
>>763861
>increasing cry of URRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
You're just making this harder on yourself.
Boris.
>Boris steps out from a corner up ahead
>I'm sorry, Fabiola.
>sticks his leg out
No.763865
>>763863
Shows what you know, I'm just animated paper.
No.763866
>>763864
Nooooo!
>flops
You traitoooor!
No.763867
No.763868
No.763869
File: 1458805247778.png (474.39 KB, 692x900, 173:225, 6e8684f968e40db4343fecc333….png)
>>763859
Look out below!
>hops down
>fuck gravity
No.763871
File: 1458805434575.png (331.89 KB, 672x1200, 14:25, b5c1f9099eaea5f7c0d5b3ea43….png)
>>763866
>[sad Boris]
>Bala hands him a twenty
Take her for sundaes tomorrow. My treat.
>stalking forward
>looming
A cat or a human you may be, but neither can outrun a dog.
No.763872
>>763865
Hey I didn't ask for an existential crisis, did I?!
No.763873
>>763869
>Char follows her down
>He lands next to her with a thud
Hmm...
>He stands up and looks around
Not bad!! Pretty cozy!
>He snaps his finger and a small rope ladder falls from the robots butthole
I'm going to go grab fire wood and sleeping bags and food and junk.
I'm gonna' throw it down do you so be ready to catch it okay?
>Char climbs back up into the robot standing sentry over the shelter
No.763874
>>763872
Ha. You still have hope.
No.763875
>>763871
Sundaes... that only means-OH NO!
>scrabbling to her feet
>about to bolt again
No.763876
File: 1458805580137.jpg (166.27 KB, 637x342, 637:342, I'm going to ruin everythi….jpg)
>>763874
Well now I don't.
No.763877
>>763873
Roger! I will catching the stuffs!
No.763878
>>763876
So...
Your mom says to call more often.
No.763879
>>763878
What's she talkin' about, I call her all the time!
No.763880
>>763875
>that's right, mini
>run all the way into the bedroom
>you're following her plans exactly
Like a rat in a trap...
>following at her leisure
No.763881
>>763877
Geronimo!!
>Firewood down
>He pokes his head out to see if she caught the bundle alright.
So, know any ghost stories?
>Wiggles his eyebrows
Marshmallows - ho!!
>The bag of jetpuffed sugarlumps bounces off her head
No.763882
>>763880
>
>oh no
It was a trap!!
No.763883
>>763879
She misses you, man.
That's some pretty deep stuff, having a family that calls you like that.
Also she said something about eating your head.
No.763884
File: 1458805906489.png (118.18 KB, 762x900, 127:150, 94fcd2134e94faa3ad7172f7d3….png)
>>763881
>she caught most of it
>and got clonked upside head again by a stray log
Oohhh...
I know many battlefield stories.
No.763885
>>763883
Ahhh yes, I remember that...she once tried to eat my head like she did with most of my other siblings.
I really should call her, I just relived a wonderful memory here.
No.763886
File: 1458805940778.png (526.1 KB, 937x1078, 937:1078, tumblr_nj12sl8URL1t7y8bxo1….png)
>>763882
>
>standing in the doorway
>goons spreading out behind her
>all looking more than a little sheepish
Where will you go now, little maid.
No.763887
>>763884
>Grins
I'd love to hear some!
>pillows and sleeping bags away!
No.763888
>>763885
Well it was more like a cruddy memory for me.
No.763889
>>763886
>outnumbered
>I still have my MAGs
>but I forgot my rubber slugs aaaaaaa
I will not go down easily!
No.763890
>>763888
No it was a good one.
Where I come from, if you survive that you are worthy of a mother's love. If not, then you didn't deserve it anyway.
No.763891
>>763889
Good.
>stepping in
>Boris takes her coat
>lights dim to arena levels
Those tattoos of yours won't be working again for another 30 minutes.
If you want out, prove it to me like a Russian.
No.763892
File: 1458806215250.jpg (90.79 KB, 566x800, 283:400, 7470963397ab82205067b24ccf….jpg)
>>763887
When I was seven years, I blew my first tank up with everyone else. I threw grenade down the turret barrel. Everyone was happy.
And in Siberia years, I cut tank in two with my tonfas to rescue my friend Bullet.
No.763893
>>763890
I just kind of fell out of my mom and dad as they cooled into igneous rock.
It was a pretty carefree childhood.
No.763894
>>763893
Your parents are rocks?!
No.763895
>>763891
If I must...
>Ultraviolent.mp4
>she was unpowered in the bar fight bacon
>still a ninja meido
No.763896
>>763894
I'm a Lavamin. We're just lava inside these suits.
Don't make it a big deal.
No.763897
>>763896
I'm just saying I didn't know your old man was celebrity Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson!
...that's what you meant, right?
No.763898
>>763895
>it's coo
>I'm Big Boss with tits
>settles into a stance
>Spetznaz CQC when she comes for the flip
>
You look nice down there.
No.763899
>>763897
...
...
...
Uuuuugghhh.
>pulls lever
No.763900
>>763892
Wow!
>Snacks incoming!
What were you doing in Siberia?
No.763901
>>763899
>
The more you do that, the less impact it has you realize.
No.763902
>>763901
That's not what the bumper stickers say!
No.763903
>>763898
>AAAAAA
No fair!
>squirman
No.763904
>>763900
I made a mistake, we were supposed to be going to a different place but because of me Bullet got caught and tortured.
So I broke in and killed everyone.
No.763905
>>763903
Don't embarrass yourself, Fabiola.
It's too soon for that.
>pomf
No.763906
>>763902
You never trust bumper stickers!
Those things always lie...once I saw bumper sticker that said, "My other car is a Millennium Falcon."
The guy driving the car was not Han Solo.
No.763907
>>763905
>stronk turned off
>you're crushing the meido, bacon
>muffled noises
No.763908
>>763906
Well it was on that one not-Tattooine planet for a lot of years before Disney got the money together to make the new one.
You never know what kind of greasy space hobo was riding it.
No.763909
>>763908
Ohhhh right.
This guy wasn't a greasy hobo, though. He was a greasy hobo looking guy.
No.763910
>>763907
>legs folded
>oh no she's getting comfy
I believe I made a request before this little charade started.
Now might be the time to make good on it.
No.763911
>>763909
Was he wearing plaid?
You can never trust a guy wearing plaid these days.
No.763913
No.763914
>>763911
He was wearing a slightly too small t-shirt that had some logo on it.
No plaid but...he didn't look all that great either.
No.763915
>>763904
...
>Impressed
Fair enough.
>He drops down and starts setting up logs under the chimney hole
Now, if we were on Mars we'd be fine because the air flow from the robot is constant for a good long time - and on top of that, oxygen sinks in an atmosphere of Co2 so we wouldn't have to worry about much escaping oxygen through the hole - but we need a vent for the fire and the heat differential would keep the airflow moving out the hole and fresh air out of the robot in.
But because this is Utah none of that really matters.
>He lights the fire
S'more?
>He starts opening the bag of marshmallows while blowing on the small flames
No.763916
>>763912
>leans down
>stupid bags getting in the way
You'll have to speak up~
No.763917
>>763915
Yus! I love more!
No.763918
>>763914
Did he have a beard to mask the fact he was balding?
It's like not having hair is suddenly unfashionable or something.
No.763919
>>763918
Not only that but he also wore a set of slightly too large pants that sagged around so he had to pull them up constantly.
It was disgusting.
No.763920
>>763919
Well at least he didn't have glasses with no lenses in them, right?
Right?
No.763921
>>763916
>eyes rollan into the back of her head
>she's passed out from squish
No.763922
>>763920
...he did.
It was in California too I think so you knew what kind of person this asshole was.
No.763923
>>763922
Well, I've been hearing good things about anthrax...
No.763924
>>763917
>Sticks a few marshmallows on a couple metal rods and hands one to her
>Holds his own over the fire and looks out the hole at the stars while they cook
so you blew up your fist tank when you were only 7, huh?
>Has a similar story from a similar age
How did you meet Big Boss and his mercenaries?
No.763925
>>763923
>
Are you saying we give the entire state of California anthrax?
No.763926
File: 1458807982851.jpg (161.27 KB, 850x963, 850:963, sample-f0688f46116c9c9350b….jpg)
>>763921
>?
>looks behind her
With great power, huh.
>guh
>rolls off the meido
Prep the smellingsalts, Boris.
>Now, Kapitan?
When I'm done.
>teddybear mode gooo
No.763927
>>763924
He raised me when my father died.
No.763928
>>763925
Well I tried it before with herpes but some other asshole already beat me to it.
No.763930
>>763928
Screw it, let's go for anthrax then!
No.763931
>>763929
>yes
>this is good
>staring at the ceiling
Am I a bad person.
>...
Mm. Yeah.
>squeeze
No.763932
>>763930
Okay.
Now we're gonna need like, a million envelopes.
No.763933
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
>>763927
>Pats her shoulder
>Father also ded
>Most of family and friends ded
No.763934
>>763932
My cousin works as a delivery bug, he should be able to hook us up.
No.763935
>>763934
Maury's Mantises is still in business?
I thought everything went up in the fire.
No.763936
>>763931
>eyes roll forward
>grab a handful
You are not the only one who plays unfair!
>squeeze
No.763937
>>763935
It did, but they managed to rebuild. This time stronger!
No.763938
File: 1458808380596.png (601.26 KB, 580x962, 290:481, 884b2994be91dea937e793422c….png)
>>763936
>!!
>I'VE BEEN HAD
Clever-
>gkkkt
...girl.
No.763939
File: 1458808395981.jpg (258.54 KB, 638x710, 319:355, fshinmai_fukei_kiruko-san_….jpg)
>>763933
>melon bread go
He was a member of Phantom too. I became leader long time later.
No.763940
>>763937
...You set that fire just to make a Million Dollar Man reference, didn't you.
No.763941
>>763938
I will show you I am not one to take lightly!
>squishsquish
No.763942
>>763940
Yes I did.
And it was very worth it.
No.763943
>>763942
Heheheheheheh.
Classic Zorak.
No.763944
>>763941
>rrrrr
Careful around the scars, Fabiola. I mean it.
>squirman
>goddamn runes better last
No.763945
>>763939
>Grins
In your blood, huh?
>Changed into fatigues at some point
No.763946
>>763943
Yeeeaaaah that's me.
Well those envelopes aren't going to get here themselves.
Better call Maury to see if I can get that many envelopes...until then, I must rest!
>recedes into his keyboard thing
No.763947
>>763944
>grrr
>man they're all staring at me
>aaaaaa
No.763948
>>763946
I miss him already.
>pulls lever
No.763949
>>763945
He died protecting Big Boss, and then he took me in.
No.763950
>>763947
>makes eye contact with Boris
I don't remember saying stop.
If you've given up the whole rebellion thing, you could at least still make this situation useful.
What's the matter, cat got your tongue.
No.763951
>>763949
>Nods
Loyalty is an admirable trait in a soldier.
>Marshmallow on fire
>Obviously not paying attention to it
No.763952
>>763950
>jeez
>closing her paratrooper jacket up
>with minimaid inside
>standard_procedure.exe
No.763953
File: 1458809219167.jpg (77.03 KB, 900x614, 450:307, tumblr_mcto4amRgR1r62895o1….jpg)
>>763952
Well you don't have to look so sore about it.
>stretchan
>let bacon's day off
>begin
No.763954
>>763951
I was leader for a few years until I decided to become police woman.
No.763955
>>763954
And you wonder why I was quick to offer you steady work?
You have very impressive credentials, Kuriko.
No.763956
>>763955
I like to choose my work. Mercenary is good for that.
No.763957
>>763956
>Leans back and blows out his burning marshmallow
Fair enough.
>Nom
No.763958
>>763957
I like the space and giant robut. If you are needing something done, you can hire me.
No.763959
>>763958
Got it.
>Takes a swig of brandy and hands her a drink
>Starts unrolling his sleeping bag
Well I'm going to get some shuteye.
Goodnight, Cadet.
>He tucks himself in and rolls over