But how? Nobody wants to address this. Love might certainly feel magical, but it's not magic, there's a science underlying it and you need to be more specific with it. These arguments based on emotions won't cut it, it's similar to stubborn superstitious people refusing to accept medicine when they are sick because they think they should get healed only by themselves or by God's power or something.
>Well, how do you succeed on the job market? There is little specific advice to give on that, either. It's the same with finding a mate.
Getting a job is basically being able to sell yourself, there's lots of advice on that, and there's nothing wrong with learning it. People take courses or go to college just to learn sales and marketing, but for some reason when it comes to learning how to market yourself to women, people get very emotional and say there's either no proper tried and test way of doing it, or it's even more complicated than quantum physics, or that's it manipulative and that you just have to blindly go ahead not knowing what the fuck you're doing because "being natural" and "just doing it" and "just being yourself" and "JUST" is the only moral way of getting a waifu. Nobody would hire you if used this bad, vague, lazy and insulting advice when looking for a job, even the act of looking for a job would seem like something shameful to you.
>Be yourself, and don't be an asshole or a complete loser. The latter part is also important.
This doesn't lead to success either. We all observe how our fathers, friends and other male figures act and we emulate them, if they are alphas then you also become alpha and this is when "being yourself" works, if they're all betas then they pass on negative traits to you and you become a loser like them, and that's a problem that could easily be fixed. (And by alpha I mean a man with the type of character that is attractive to women, and which evokes respect from other men)
>You have to stop caring about having a woman in your life, and you have to stop caring about every single women you meet.
That's what I meant. You shouldn't give them the cold shoulder, you can't be a thirsty motherfucker with a scarcity mindset, you have to learn to be happy with yourself being alone first so that you can go for a girl without being needy, because women can smell this shit from a mile away, and they fucking hate it. This is basic shit, but most guys don't know this, they hover around a girl, they stalk her on the internet, after a year they finally get the balls to utter a confession to her and get rejected and start crying in a pillow. PUA deals with this shit, nothing else does.
>My impression back when I read their advice was that they indeed care far more about how you act. Might have been a wrong impression, granted. I am open to that possibility, at least when we talk about specific PUA worskshops or communities.
Well yeah, some of these workshops are outright scams, it's easy to tell apart them apart from the real ones though. Shit like that's to be expected in any self-improvement community. In health, fitness and bodybuilding they also scam you with fake advice and magic shortcuts and force you to pay for shit.
>Most of it does not focus on bettering yourself.
Essentially it really is bettering yourself, there's really no other way to do it. You can't be a total loser and get a good girlfriend or wife, you might get laid if that's what you want, it's not hard, there's lots of cheap sluts around who will fuck anything, but you need to become a high-quality guy to get a waifu-material girl, getting her isn't even the hard part, it's being able to keep her. And you're right, that's not how PUA advertises itself, the funny thing is, the girls become the bait and guys improving themselves is something they get but didn't exactly sign up for. It's like having a big brother who brags about being the "pussy master", and when you ask him how to get a chick, he tells you to learn how to play guitar, and whether or not you actually get chicks becomes irrelevant to you, because even if you don't, you get something else that's valuable too.