/mai/ - Waifu

>they find you having an affair

>implying this would EVER happen

>me

>having an affair

sage because that would never happen and the day it would I'd just want to hang myself.

I hate being that guy doesn't answer the question but that would never happen and i can't even think about

>>36310

>affair

This doesn't make sense. Why would I throw away a relationship with the most wonderful woman in the world? It wouldn't even cross my mind because I'd be satisfied and happy.

>>36317

>you can't un-bump a thread

>implying I'm that stupid

>not understanding I erased my previous post just because I'd forgot to sage

>not understand this sage is all about showing you don't like the thread

>>36318

Indeed. There isn't even a need to look why.

>her "ability to read the atmosphere" has the same double-meaning pun in English and Japanese

>she could tell if we were having problems well before they got severe enough for me to get that desperate

>she could probably steer me into doing whatever the hell she pleased

Let's be real here, the only way I would ever end up "cheating" on her is if it was keikaku doori and she wanted to add another woman to our bedroom funtimes.

In this entirely hypothetical situation I would be dead. I think I'd be disappointed in her if she didn't nuke me.

I'll admit, I didn't think the subject matter all the way through…. Just a hypothetical situation as excuse to imagine what our wives would do to us….

>>36328

>>36326

I'd like to think it would be an extreme situation where someone would have to force you to cheat on them. Like blackmail or something–like if you didn't have sex with whoever is trying to get you to cheat on your beloved they would kill them.

A lot of waifus/husbandos here have superpowers or are strong enough or can stop that from even ever happening and/or outright kill the blackmailer.

Not sure why anybody would try to blackmail any of us really.

Actually this gave me a thread idea.

>>36330

>if you didn't have sex with whoever is trying to get you to cheat on your beloved they would kill them.

>not killing the blackmailer first

Anon pls.

>>36332

good point there

I sorry /mai/.. I fucked up..

Sage as not to bump this pointless thread..

I…I'm sorry my love…

He was just so handsome and forceful, a-and it would be so long before you came home! You must understand that I had no choice but to give in to what my body felt!

Interesting hypothetical. Still wouldn't possibly happen.

I wouldn't have an affair. Ever. Why would I cheat on Lyn?

That being said, if she did come in on me and another woman, She'd grab her blade disappear and slash us both before I knew what hit me.

Never piss off a swordmaster.

>I get possessed by a meddling spirit

>Spirit uses my body to seduce some ugly broad while waifu isn't looking

>Patchouli finds me in this state

>Recognizing the signs of possession, she uses a spell to remove the spirit from my body

>I come to my senses, ugly broad loses interest and leaves

>Patchouli understands that wandering spirits happen, but she's still a little sore about it

>I take her out to a nice picnic to make it up to her

>Everything works out good, and I now have a resistance to possession

I think this is actually kind of a fun idea. Thinking of how you would be in a situation that you wouldn't want to be in, and how it would be resolved.

Another one

>Contacted by government agent

>I am the only one in the world who is able to kill some crazy dictator or whatever, because reasons

>They need me to participate in a plan to assassinate him and save the world

>I agree because I don't want the world to be destroyed by crazy dude

>They need me to infiltrate into a fancy party the dictator is holding at his cancel

>All guests are expected to bring a date

>My date is Ms. Whatever, who is my backup in case anything goes wrong

>I never get the chance to tell Patchouli about all of this

>she'll understand.jpg

>At party

>Suddenly Patchouli bursts through the ceiling and freezes Ms. Whatever in a block of ice

>Man down

>Suddenly surrounded by men with guys

>Patchouli realizes what's going on

>Strong gust of wind blows everyone else in the party to the other side of the world

>No survivors, mission a success

>"Well, no sense in letting this food go to waste, right Patchouli?"

>her face when

>Epilogue

>Apparently that was the government's plan the whole time

>Ms. Whatever makes full recovery

>Patchouli forgives me on the condition that I tell her next time I'm drafted as a secret agent

>me having an affair

>her killing anyone

this is silly

i cant imagine her doing it

i cant imagine her smashing even a fly

>>36337

>only noticed this post just now

she' would beat me up anon, probably kick me right in the balls…

then take me to therapy, psychologists, doctor, whatever it takes to cure me of my problem, she would stand by me until i'm a better person for her, as long as I tried my best to change, she would help me

God I hope you are still here to read this because im sure Kino would do the same

>>36326

the fucking irony right here

>me

>being enough of an imbecile to have an affair when I'd claim to be in a relationship with her

This is basically everyone's answer already but I thought like I just had to answer this way.

If it was anything they'd find about and be sad afterwards I'd try my best to comfort her and assure her I didn't intended to pain her at all.

>having an affair

I would be hacked to pieces and my head would be on a pike at her next wedding.

It wouldn't happen. I would rather die than cheat on her, we'd be together so often that I'd hardly have a chance, and she'd always leave me feeling too, well… drained… to be having an affair with anyone else. So even if I wanted to, it simply wouldn't occur.

This thread is kuso to be quite honest.

>>52163

Yes, I'm still here, I pop in from time to time.

If Kino does that to me.. I couldn't imagine how much the crushing guilt would feel.. How much I'd want to put an end to myself for taking advantage of my darling.. fuck, I might break down then and there..

>assuming I'll be dumb enough to cheat on her

>she's a master of the martial arts

>she can break me in pieces without me even realize it

I'll be dead. But, as >>52351 said, it wouldn't happen, because I love her. Period.

>implying I would ever cheat on Ryuko

But if in some alternate reality I did, I'd probably be beat close to death.

If I were cheating she'd be more than capable of actually killing me which isn't fun to think about. But for a less serious offense I'd probably get hit with a book which would still hurt a lot.