No.754
>be me
>pie lover always was always will be
>my name is meatchop
>my dad was a butcher and would always cook me pie for dinna
>fucking loved pie
>first time I came was in a pie
>have qt bird
>she loves pie as well
>10/10 life
>one day I go to America with me bird
>don't want to it's gonna be shit
>amerifats can't make pie
>go to birds mates house
>(the amerifats)
>they live in one of then sky houses the ones with a bunch of them
>had to claim fuckin like 10000 steps
>smells like market must be weed heads
>start to get hungry from second hand weed
>fuck I could go for a pie
>the door opens
>oh no… No no no…
>this cunt has dreadlocks
>what a fucking puff
>tells me to come in
>(cum in his mum am I right lads?)
>says dinner will be done soon
>his bird is sitting down
>she does some bowing she and says "nam-a-stay" or some shit
>I just look at here and say were do I sit
>they don't have anywhere to sit they sit on the ground like some damn eastern jap
>already pissed
>horny as fuck need a pie
>dinner is soon
>"oi you cookin pie!?"
>she says she does not cook but her boy friend does
>whatthefuckisthissweden.jpg
>alright some of the best cooks are men can't be that bad
>he says do I like pie
>I get a fucking boner
>horny as fuck now and hungry
>he brings out a plat
>of fucking greens!
>what the fuck is this shit! I say
>tells me it's food
>my bird says just eat the starters pie will be after
>it fucking stink
>it's green
>it's not meat
>after eating the "food" he says pie is ready
>he comes out
>something not right
>the pie is fucking cold!!!
>start screaming my head of punch my bird in the face and myself gettin pissed
>dude calm down let's get you some pie!
>he cuts it
>fucking blood is coming out
>start fukin his wife
>he tells me to stop
>I said it's fucking raw I can see blood!
>he says it's not blood it's just jam
>what the fuck! Fruit pie!!!!!!
>fuck her till she passes out
>grab this hippies hair start fucking him to in anger
>I walk away with my bird crying
>never going to the USA again
>the pie was great tbf
>and got 2 fucks
>8/10 night I would say
No.791
>mfw you like fruit pie
No.792
>fruit pie