/mental/ - Mental Health, Illnesses and Disorders

Because normal people have no reason to understand why you're so fucked up, thus you get nervous at the prospect of their judgement.

>>3250
Even fucked up people are a chore. Even my own fucking grandparents I just want the conversation to end and I don't know why. Definitely have a major fear of being judged negatively though. I reflexively wince at the sound of my own name from people I know.

My parents can barely hold conversations either though. They raised me okay but they're clueless socially it seems like. I feel like I need to escape my own personality before it becomes set in stone.

>>3251
Yeah I know how you feel.

I'm getting to not even liking talking to people online.

>>3252
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You both like depressed.

You: hi

Stranger: hii

You: i just

You: had

You: an awkward dinner

You: with my family

You: i dont like talking to people

Stranger: ohh.

You: because

You: im not very good at it

Stranger has disconnected.

Obviously I bombed that, but fuck, it's hard not to. How depressed and awkward I am is all I seem to think about anymore, and it's hard to switch out of that mode for any reason. There's a shitton of pressure to be funny and likable. I don't really feel very funny and likable. I don't usually laugh or find myself liking things.

One good suggestion has been to just listen to a bunch of talk shows and comics in the hope that it will sort of rub off on me. I guess getting out there and just trying until it starts working is something I'll have to do eventually no matter what though. But fuck, feeling awkward and stymied in casual conversation is one of the worst feelings I've felt.

>>3254
Omegle is fucking horrid. Most people on there have no personalities whatsoever.

I've tried listening to talk shows and stuff but it hasn't helped me at all.

>>3256
It's because they're about the technique of the thing. I don't know about you, but personally I'm actually alright at conversing when I'm feeling fine. The problem is that 95% of the time I'm not. Having a wide repertoire of humorous styles and topics to call on doesn't really change the heart of the matter - it's hard to have a fun time talking to people when you hate yourself, and if you're not having fun, they won't be either.

I'm thinking about achievements. Things like sports and art. Maybe if I find some self worth in those fields I'll be more capable of feeling that way with people.

>>3258
I can pretend I'm at least vaguely sane in conversation, but afterwards I keep thinking, "shouldn't have said that, shouldn't have done that, you're a fuckup and everyone hates you a little more than they already did, and holy fuck are you a massive disappointment to those that care about you".

That bites the hardest.

>>3247
It's not hard.

Tell me what's your problem and i'll tell you how to solve it , maybe.

I had problems in expressing my thoughts to others.
I couldn't get my thoughts out of my mind in a comprensible state.
So i started writing.
I ended up writing a book, and now i can talk about the most metaphisical thing, i can always make others understand.

>>3260
> "shouldn't have said that, shouldn't have done that, you're a fuckup and everyone hates you a little more than they already did, and holy fuck are you a massive disappointment to those that care about you".

I'm so glad I'm not the only one.

>>3263
I don't have thoughts, socially. My mind becomes blank. Occasionally something stupid comes out, like saying "Good luck!" as a parting note to a mechanic I've left with a leaky tire, but more often than not I just can't think of anything worth a damn. It's like I can only react, never act or actually create something conversationally. My father's the same way. Always following, never leading, and when he does lead, it's weird. A lot of this is that I haven't really cultivated any interests, besides a patchy study of my own behavior and of politics and history. Although I can speak passionately about these issues, seldom can I do so without feeling boring or depressing, a feeling that is heightened by my inability to relax, express mirth, cause them smile.

I also have a lot of trouble with body language. I can read other people's expressions and stances pretty well, but I can't seem to act anything other than miserably depressed myself. I notice that I'm bent over. I don't know what to do with my hands. I nervously rub my hair or rock from side to side. And most damningly I can't seem to maintain eye contact. I almost unthinkingly look away if someone matches my gaze, and if I don't, my eyes start to water and I feel like I'm staring unnaturally. It feels like I've thought too much about these things to be able to do anything without being self conscious about it.

>>3268
So it's a huge anxiety problem huh.

I can feel you btw, i was like that for some time.

You should find weird people to talk to.
You sure know how to identify a weird person, giving you said you recognize stances and facial expressions.
Start a conversation with some of them and try to be their friend.

Anxiety is a bitch.
You just gotta knock her down, somehow.

For me talking to gurls in particular feels like trying to climb a mountain alone while being paraplegic. I don't communicate well with them, but just looking, or even knowing their presence makes me feel overwhelmingly anxious. I stressed out in the subway just because i fucking swear i could feel her FUCK OFF!! aura around her from miles away. As soon as another bench was free she immediately switched so she could have me in front of her face. Immediately had psychopathic thoughts, i wanted to kill her so bad.

>>3307
No i ain't fat and i thanks whatever greater power there is in this universe for this everyday. I honestly have no idea what's so wrong. (The brain is The brain is The brain is The brain is) My friends look so much worse than me and yet i see them holding hands with the best qt's. I don't think my hygiene is a problem since i like showering… ok i don't change my hoodie very often… no other excuse loovin da hood… Some men are just condemned… I feel condemned. Growing ever more bitter toward them. I feel like ignoring them utterly and completely wasn't a particularly good idea. I'm just more angry at them.

>>3310
I wish I knew what to say, m8. Maybe post a picture if you're so inclined and I'll try to give you advice. BTW women can tell when you're focused on them, even if you aren't looking at them directly.

>>3312
No pic of me on my hard drive but i would have done it in the game thread.
I sorta wish you could tell me at least something but never mind it.
>BTW women can tell when you're focused on them, even if you aren't looking at them directly.
How the actual fuck!!?

>>3319
Vibes bruh. Humans are wizards.

>>3312
>BTW women can tell when you're focused on them, even if you aren't looking at them directly.
I'm a woman and can vouch that this is true. It's that sense of someone staring at you. You can just feel it. It's creepy.

>>3324
I didn't even made eye contact with her how am i creepy?
unnecessary information: YET I COULD STILL FEEL THE HORROR RADIATING OUT OF HER!!!

>>3328
It feels bad to feel like someone is just eyeballing you like a piece of meat. Plus women always have a fear of being raped or groped or some shit so we have to always be on alert about that crap.

>>3329
>It feels bad to feel like someone is just eyeballing you like a piece of meat.
I can guess, in my case however i just wanted to get the fuck out of that train and never see her again. I have no one to blame but myself although i have no idea what i did so wrong to them… makes me crazy. Ignoring them is tough, they're everywhere…
>Plus women always have a fear of being raped or groped or some shit so we have to always be on alert about that crap.
I fully acknowledge this point but personally i wouldn't do this because i'm too socially handicapped to do that kind of shit. if women are paranoid about that kind of things i get paranoid just by their presence! Whatever why am i trying to fight a curse anyway…
OOOO i have a question: If it feels creepy being eyeballed at by some guy would most women mind it if they were eyeballed by some _handsome_ guy?

>>3330
>would most women mind if they were eyeballed by some handsome guy?

It depends.
An handsome guy would most definitely get more positive attention, but if he looks like a psychopath he scares woman anyway.

>>3333
Physical appearance is therefore important in making contact with women.
Well i got a bad start ever since i took my first breath of fresh air thanks.
Curse confirmed. Shitlyfe.

>>3336
What exactly made you think it wasn't important?

Break your curse, a thing at a time.
Sport is a great way of building up self confidence, and gettig rid of one of your problems.

And, you can be ugly as much as you want, but a fit ugly is still a 6/10 minimum.

>>3337
Can't i just talk to them without facial surgery/getting told to gtfo!? If it's hard to talk to people for OP, my problem isn't people, it's women. Which falls into the same category anyway. If you were talking to me, eye to eye, you wouldn't see my eyes, i would be wearing a mask so you wouldn't make a single comment of my babyface THAT would be necessary if i want to speak to women. I'm at THAT point! Where i SINCERELY BELIEVE a WWII gasmask GREATLY ENHANCE my facial appearance and without it, i'll look awkward, cringe worthy, pathetic and mumblin' "ehh ehh… heehee…hi"!
Why is my face, a face i haven't choose at all is a problem!? The rest is fine though! Flat like a peice of plywood, no huge fucking craters on face nor white pimples, NOTHINGS GONNA EXPLODE! And yet this is what they prefer… init WOLOLO.convert.
I shouldn't go apeshit on you so i apologize… Break the curse… one thing at a time… ok… Well i'm the only one who can do this… first being asking for b& and stop talking.

Racoon pls ban me for 2 days.
Just 2 days.
PLS

>>3347
Didn't namefag, sorry :^)

>>3330
I get eyeballed by handsome guys all the time and I'm still heavily creeped out.

Then again I'm a lesbian.

>>3339
Yes, you can talk to them.
Confidence is the key, girls feel your fear and start avoiding you because of that.

You need self respect in order to talk confidently to girls, and sport is the key of that…most of the times.

Good luck.

I'm kinda curious, what do women generally think about some average looking guy, whose just sitting alone in his thoughts, not looking at anyone and smiling.

Is that creepy/weird?

>>4840
Nah, most women would just be happy you weren't creeping on them.

>>4846
Are you sure? Women interpret anything as "creeping". I can feel it, I'm really distracted, some girl walking by catches my attention, I try to focus on something else but I can't because acting like you're not paying attention makes things worse. So she turns her attention towards me and thinks "ugh, why is that creepy guy checking me out" when I'm already too nervous to have any thought remotely relating to sexual stuff.

That, and "oh god I accidentally looked at her boobs/thighs/butt", and then they start thinking you're weird because again, a look and then you become aroused in the nervous non-sexual sense, easily confused for the emotional response of "she caught me actually staring at her ass".

because people are not always predictable.

>>4840
That is kinda creepy indeed.