>>7537No, it can't. It really can't. I was with a BPD girl for two years. She was my everything. I was head over heels in love with her. Every day that passed she just got more and more abusive, until she cheated on me, cut me off, and started everything all the fuck over with the new guy. They're like broken records. It's like they all the same girl.
I read dozens of books on BPD, I contacted two different BPD expert counselors, 2/3rds of counselors won't even work with BPDs. Meanwhile, treating people who survived relationships with them is a thriving industry.
Lemme break it down for you OP. So you're a girl, right? That's strike one. Ignore what you think about yourself, generally speaking do people tell you you're pretty? Strike two.
There's a reason there are less male BPDs than female BPDs, and it's the same reason BPD symptoms gradually decrease with age. A BPD is mentally an adult, but emotionally a child. You throw tantrums and have mood swings like a four year old, but with all the venom and thought of an adult. Girls get away with it longer because they have much higher rates of neoteny. The symptoms start to decrease the less people pay attention to it. I know, I'm kind of being a dick with you. Believe it or not, this is important. People saying "Oh, poor you. I'm so sorry your life is so horrible." that's just enabling you. BPDs live for attention. As less and less people will give that reaction, you act out less. I'm gonna tell you the worst case scenario, what happens to most BPDs. BPDs have high rates of suicide *threats* but very low rates of actual suicide. It's just for attention. Many BPDs will refuse to accept they have it, then the second problem is if they do accept they have it, they use it as a crutch and an excuse for their bad behavior. You want to get better OP? Don't do that. Your BPD is no excuse. Your parents don't matter, you have to take responsibility for your actions. You're intelligent enough to understand this.
Worst cast, BPD burns every bridge with every friend and family member and ends up driving to insane asylums and threatening suicide for attention because they're legally required to take you seriously. That's worst case.
So, how do you get better? I'm gonna give you the steps. 1. Take cognitive behavioral therapy. It'll help you identify when you're acting strangely before you do, and you'll learn to control your emotions. 2. You need to find an identity you like. Stick with one name, one hair color, one clothing style, one job. You need stability, and to like yourself before you'll stick with it. 3. You need to travel frequently. I have no idea why, but this for some reason decreases BPD symptoms. 4. Confront whatever event triggered your BPD in childhood (and it may not be the one you think it is) deal with it , accept it, and get over it. 5. Accept that you have BPD, but it doesn't excuse your actions or make any bad thing you do. If you seriously follow these steps, you can get better.
God have mercy on your boyfriend.