Let's talk about faggot cats of all colors and sizes.
I want to smooch a cheshire's abs.
>nothing remotely resembling this will ever happen in your lifetime
>nothing remotely resembling this will ever happen in your lifetime
But it will, anon.
t. future President-Fuhrer
Activate the memes
FOREVER EVER, ANON
That's a dead meme son
She looks like she would be really soft. I wouldn't mind her wrapping those fluffy arms around my waist late at night while I'm trying to shitpost, whispering over my shoulder about how shit my memery is.
Is there a pic related edit for Faggotmemecat?
how could she just steal 40 cakes
>not wanting to be suffocated by the smell of thos beans
>not wanting to suffocate her with the beans between your legs instead
the ghetto aussie accent really hits the nail on the head for how annoying they are
You should either stop writing or learn how to properly write.
The first is far easier, but honestly either one of those works.
There isn't enough talk of cheshires' reality-bending powers outside of teleportation and invisibility. What about doing things like telepathically impregnating themself with your sperm from across the room, simply smugging the whole time as your penis feels a rainbow of continually alternating pussy types until your penis milk simply vanishes out of your balls and into her womb before it can even properly exit your shaft?
Not to mention that's all going on while you're going down a waterslide filled with jello.
What flavor would the jello be?
>imagining chesire licking you with her tongue in 30 places simultaneously
>laying in bed waxing the rod.
>abruptly the bed is on a stage.
>sounds of monster girls cheering and laughing come from the row of seats.
>cheshire roommate is front and center 100% satisfied.
>stop, quickly close porn, and cover
>get blue balled
Fucking faggot cats. She has yet to bring the bed back.
>I used to like cheshire cats a lot
>Thenis they got associated with memes
>I come to the thread and see this
We've gone to far
what the heck is that first one's source?
>>imagining chesire licking you with her tongue in 30 places simultaneously
I assume it's an article from cracked.com, I wouldn't visit it now, as it's been current yeared
>insert peñor into vagiña
>feel tongue licking you from inside it
>Doing my business, helping dogs, cats, the occasional hamster
>Suddenly a disgruntled man comes through office doors
>He's pulling a cheshire cat by the wrist with him, who's just floating around, like a fluffy, purple balloon
Hello sir, do you have an appoin-
>"Can you neuter this cat to make it less of a faggot?"
>Look at cheshire, who's just staring back with the widest grin.
Don't you mean if I can spay the-
>"I know what I said."
I remember in 2012, 2013 when it was a decent place for listicles.
Worse yet, imagine a cheshire magician pulling your dick out of her hat.
>cheshire imouto decides to prank you by taping a "marry me" sign to the back of your shirt before you go to school
What happens to you as a result?
You get proactively dated by one of the teachers when they bring you back to their audience to discuss you getting bullied.
Don't know why I put audience. No bully pls.
imagine a Cheshire magician magician pulling a hat out of your dick
I was thinking of a Cheshire magician pulling her own ass out of her hat and realize that her upper body is suspended in midair.
imagine a Cheshire magician pulling her ass out of your dick
That sounds painful.
>cheshire pulling your dick out of her ass while pulling her ass out of your dick creating an infinite mobius loop
Imagine a cheshire shoving her hand through your ona hole. during use and desperately waving it around trying to to grab you before finally sticking her head through and pretending to be a dullahan
the cheshire is now officially a really extreme australian catgirl dullahan
I think of them more as the monster girl version of the viet cong as I'd imagine trying to walk through wonderland is akin to patrolling in vietnam.
>fall down rabbit hole
>"this is the end" starts playing
the doors are better than CCR
>come back with PTSD
>Post Teatime Sexual Disorder
>Nature channel shows a Wonderland Cheshire documentary for the evening time slot
>It Ain't Me starts playing
Someone post the webm with the edited song. I don't have it.
In all my years of life, I have never met a person more wrong than you are right now.
shit taste tbh famalam
I'd give everything to have her pounce me.
>better than CCR
what worldline shat you out tbh
CCR and the doors aren't even comparable, they're too different.
Fuck, the doors isn't comparable to anything since they were so original and with CCR I can only come up with very few tunes from random bands that sound CCR-y.
but they're not better though
Imagine a cheshire pulling her head out of her pussy and then giving you a blowjob whil your dick is in her cunt.
The only novel thing about the Doors was that they had their keyboardist playing the bass line. Jim Morrison was really one of the dime a dozen late sixties singers and only got lionized after his death. Just like John Lennon
I'm from Cheshire, OP. And I'll be moving back home relatively soon. How should I deal with the locals? pls hlp, I like my sanity.
Move to the Isle of Wight instead, better waifu.
>Isle of Wight
That's not Lichfield.
We can compromise here. Undead monstergirls are generally top tier with a few exceptions.
>I know which song you mean
>but my head plays the shitty title theme from James Bond 007 Skyfall
>fuck it cheshire cats are now members of Spectre
Damn. The cat was the real villain all along.
>Cheshire super villain
>arch nemesis is the she-bat
Both monster girls fighting to protect or destroy the city
I may writefag this if I ever get time
Question is, can they have babies?
Of course. Generally with ketchup.
Funny, very funny.
>this was a dude all along
My reaction folder fell for a trap that wasn't even trying.
I'm imagining a good-natured cheshire doing what's in this photo if she can't help but smile like other cheshires.
Anyone got the screencap of that greentext where anon uses painkillers or whatever to ignore a cheshire?
Holy shit, my Cheshire pumpkin.
>haven't been on monster since around late 2015
>come back and see some of my autism still being posted
I can't prove it, but, I will admit I got banned by Aux(?) can't remember his name.
The last few stories that I saw written on here were the one about the Cheshire and the Hellhound running for class president, monster girl gangsters, I remember that wolfgirl greentext where the boys sister becomes a wolfgirl, and it had something to do with cans of ravioli.
I'll post some of the other shit I did too.
I might as well post some of the pure cringe stories that I wrote too.
I can't find the first cap I took of my Mask-themed story, but I can't imagine anyone liked it enough to save it.
Sorry that first picture isn't mine, just mixed up the filenames. I haven't touched this folder since about 2015.
A lot of these are absolute trash-tier, but I was pumping out anything to keep the threads alive then.
Would you be a cheshire's meme daddy?
Does anyone here remember these?
Ugh I really disliked the first one.
You literally can't even, anon?
I remember there was an anon then named Beardicus, and he liked cowgirls, is he still around?
It looks bad dude.
And was about when the cheshire threads were becoming really shit.
Oh. Well, right, like I said, it was mostly cringe shit I was posting, which.
But looking around here I do see a few of the edits I did still getting posted, that's surreal.
2014/2015 was a good year on /monster/ fellow pumpkin carver.
What did you even get banned for? I don't remember you getting banned for admitting you fucked your pumpkin.
I'm from the home of Cheshire cats. I'll be going back there in two months - pray for my sanity (and my pelvis).
Oh wow that's pretty nice. There is something about the force and dominance manticores and other mamonos have that I'm afraid cheshire cats might not possess. They look so soft and fluffy, I sometimes have trouble seeing them as being rough.
I did say they were pretty shitty, my man.
Damn that's a good picture, well done if it's yours.
I can't even entirely remember what I was banned for. And what do you mean, anon-kun? I-I didn't fuck a pumpkin because two anons got dubs. That makes it sound like I was looking for a reason.
My Nigel folder is almost as big as my Cheshire folder.
>Damn that's a good picture, well done if it's yours.
Wasn't mine, but yeah, it's a fun pic.
I've got this couch saved in my Cheshire folder but I don't remember if it was important to anything.
Some more OC. The second image goes along with the other two distorted versions of kenkou cross's original drawing, they're supposed to be a Cheshire cat simulator.
Some more OC. The second image goes along with the other two distorted versions of kenkou cross's original drawing, they're supposed to be a Cheshire cat simulator.
You just need special eyes anon
I had a feeling something was fucked when it wouldn't post the first time. Shit.
Legitimately took me a minute. Really nice.
The amontillado pic went with some story I was doing in one of those thread where we pretended we're mamono on a /human/ forum.
>Purposefully posting the futanari now
I could've accepted the first time as just an accident, but now you've done it.
I was thinking more dream-access and property-altering, myself. Even in sleep, you are not safe from her.
YOU'RE ALIVE! It's me, Lovecraft-anon, not that I got much written. You here to stay this time?
I did it twice? Sorry, anon.
Hol-lee Jesus, I still remember.
I'm seriously considering staying on. If this reply goes through it means I'm not banned for posting futa at least.
>Cheshire and the Hellhound running for class president
>Someone sill remembers that
Man. That thing would be weird to re-read. I remember really enjoying writing it, but I didnt exactly know much about what I was doing. I got time, maybe I should try my hand at it again.
come on niggerino, i need some good writefagging in my bloodstream pronto
Go for it, my man. I still think of it from time to time. Admittedly my favourite part is thought of an entire room crowded full of different kinds of mamono, and then being shoved into it like the protagonist did.
I always kicked around the idea of doing a conceptual continuation of that cheshire story though. The year after, the Cheshire and Hellhound (and payton) moved up a grade so it'd follow a another guy (maybe from a different walk of life, so I cannot stumble into writing a self insert) seeing how the social division between species has disappeared and how that effects the usual tropes of a high school. Example I thought of was like the social implications of the high school jock getting a Succubus or Oni as a girl friend and how the other humans would react to their friends relationship. How many people do you think would be down that in a format like before?
Ehh, I'll admit the whole high school teen drama bit isn't really my bag.
I'm sure there's a few anons here who might like it.
i think the school setting is a mite old-hat, maybe a more urban or rural setting would be interesting
This thread needs more lewd.
Well there you go.
I need to repost my rewrite in this thread, then find ways to expand on it.
Hmm. I wouldnt mind trying something different entirely. I'll see what I can think of.
maybe a small town in the midwest or washington state would be interesting
Apply the same concept of looking at the integration of monsters on a domestic level, just in a small town where generally every body is important to a degree. That might work better and I could branch off ideas from there.
>skinwalkers attempt to join civilization
could be cute i guess
Yeah, man, I'll look out for it.
I really like this idea. >>312827
What in the hell am I doing, I've had this related story in my folder the whole time. This one definitely isn't mine. Too good.
Anyone have any laska? She is my fetish
Is that a particular artist, or…?
Preferably less, preferably preferably the shit he tried to delete.
Is this preferable?
It's going the right direction but I've seen it before
>google tells me Laska is the story of a Cheshire cat who's mother abused her and cut off pieces of her ear.
You really are into some sick shittu desu, aren't you anon-kun?
That's not the fetish part, in fact it's not a sexual story at all
At one point there was at least a spin-off ending where incest happens but right now so far as I know it's just cute shit and triggering dipshits
I didn't figure it was a sexual story. Thought she seems to lose more ear as the pictures go on. I hate to see an injured monster girl. I haven't actually played the game, so I don't know if mamono actually duel to the death with their swords, or what exactly. I see the purge memes constantly, in the game is the Church trying to genuinely destroy mamono?
This has no relationship to the game.
Are you new here?
I was breaking off from the subject, niggeretto.
You did it in a really awkward way
You know, I read that in a sort of distaff Cheshire Cat voice from the Disney, except with a little more meow.
It was a man who had a condition where he had multiple uncontrollable orgasms.
>he said as he stood beside his father's coffin he ejaculated 9 times
Every day that you aren't getting swole, The Hellhoundfags win
Soda and chips are for Vamp Mosquito-tier husbandos.
>preferably preferably the shit he tried to delete.
Do you perhaps know why he deleted so much of his old stuff? I've been wondering about that.
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
Found it, I think.
Cheshires aren't the stablest of the Wonderlanders by any means (though most inhabitants of that strange pseudo-realm will scoff at the notion of sanity being a thing of value), but they are held as the most skilled actors and writers from whence they came (there is a quiet rivalry between them and shapeshifting Mamano over their mutual capacity to fool and bedevil). While each Cheshire prefers to keep a wide territory away from her kind, as a general rule this species of Mamono values wit, improvisation, and adaptation highly. When individuals of their kind meet, Cheshires will seek to outdo each other in technically polite volley of veiled insults, backhanded compliments, optical illusions, and minor space-shifting pranks. It is said that the land afterwards will smell strongly of lavender and afternoon tea.
Despite their carnivorous nature, Cheshire Cats typically abhor direct violence in favor of trapping or tricking their prey into their demise. Anything more direct is "so very verily uncivilized." This extends to their dealings with humans and other Mamono: whenever possible, the Cheshire will evade, trip up, discombobulate, disorientate, and distract any possible threat until they have given up hostilities. For this reason, some of their kind moonlight as security planners and designers (though they have to be kept on a short leash, as a bored Cheshire may go beyond the bounds of a functioning plan).
Cheshire Cats are infamous for their teasing, playful, and often demented antics directed at humans who have taken their fancy. While this is best known by their lovers and spouses, the behavior extends to platonic friends and in-laws (as with all Wonderlanders, Cheshires put a peculiar value on the trappings of "civilization," though what civilization that is has been up for vigorous debate). Using all of her powers of wit, illusion, and space-warping, she will trip up, prank, troll, and otherwise drive her target to utter distraction. The more extreme of these methods only have full effectiveness inside man-made structures, of which inversion of gravity and complication of interior layout are typical favorites in the feline arsenal. The victim will usually be rewarded with poetry and limericks of the Cat's own invention, coupled with a cup of supernaturally strong tea (which she will insist she 'borrowed' from the March Hare; the number of cups delivered with this excuse since the Cheshires' discovery has made its validity rather dubious), before resuming her silliness. This treatment intensifies if the target attempts to ignore the Cheshire, though the Cats have been known to lessen their efforts if the target is incapable of showing notice (comatose, in a medical state of shock, dead, et cetera).
To those the Cat intends to court, however, the term "fuzzy chatty gadfly" has been applied.
It is here that this document concerns itself with the Cheshire Cat's grin. A Cat wears a near-perpetual smile on her face, as she and her kind find any sort of outsider amusing (and enjoy the reaction such a smile provokes). A Cat's smile widens or narrows depending on her mood, with many subtle gradations few outside their kind can understand. It is also usually the first and last part any living thing sees of the Cheshire. As such, each Cat takes good care of her teeth (it would be "very verily uncivilized" not to). But for a potential mate, the Cat polishes her smile to a gleaming mirror sheen.
Said gleaming teeth shall literally be the first thing the target will see of her, typically no more than a meter in front of them. If the target does not flee in that instant, the Cheshire will manifest the rest of her head and introduce herself. Never in that initial conversation will she make clear her real intentions, just intimating that she would like a friend to "practice with" and "come by for tea." If the object of her desire accepts this offer (with a murky definition of "acceptance"), then for an indefinite period of time, the Cheshire will focus all her efforts on the target. During this time, she will endeavor to stay within at least one hundred feet of her target, spending much of her free time on devising pranks and ways to catch her desired one off-guard.
Thanks to the bizarre nature of the Wonderlanders, and in particular the Cheshire, sleep is by no means an escape from the series of steadily raunchier pranks. Cats may remotely monitor their chosen mate remotely while asleep. In fact, the Cheshire will begin appearing in the target's dreams once their sleep cycles are synchronized, inviting them to do whatever they wish with her. As is the nature of dreams, everything from romps across cities made of song, to vicious verbal sparring through fields of crystal, to wild spontaneous airborne orgies among thick clouds of lavendar perfume may happen and not be questioned.
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
Accounts of Wonderland are often held as fantastical even by the "real" world's standards, and often contradict between recounters. However, since the Cheshire Cats are the most cooperative sources on this pseudorealm (the others either too insane by reasonable standards, answering vaguely, or in the Jabberwock's case, redirecting all conversation to focus on itself and its domains), their word is seen as the most reliable. As is their nature, they can be anywhere from coy, to shockingly frank, to completely esoteric and metaphorical on the subject, shifting as it fits their whims (and the grammar of the questioner; one has to be careful about how they phrase their query, lest the Cheshire take delight in bogging them down in feigned ignorance and inanity).
According to the Cats, their role in Wonderland for centuries has been to guide outsiders and saner residents through the pseudorealm safely. This role is explicitly apolitical and neutral by "ancient and most civilized writ," and so they "help" every traveller they meet, be they cooperative or not. Many of those still dwelling in Wonderland do owe an allegiance to an entity known as the Duchess of Spice (part of the writ, apparently), but in general they are left alone (a visit once per year is required, though). As for the "help," they keep travellers safe from the pseudorealm's dangers, but seem quite happy to send their followers through all sorts of (debatably) more harmless local phenomena (going by the complaints of those who have returned). They consider it a "good education" for visitor to see Wonderland, whether they wish to or not, and will make headspinning smalltalk to their captive audience at random intervals.
Well, it should be quite telling, my dear sirs, that felis invisibilis fassiculis consider seriously injuring partners deliberately or by complete accident a dire taboo (in fact, that's one of the very few things that can make a Cheshire grimace). So, as is natural, the good Cat makes sure to practice on other things with fluid or electrical flow until no splash or discharge happens and all is functional as normal.
Such careful semi-puppeteering is for startling, and then for pleasurable experimentation in private.
As for where they live, well sir, it depends. Some choose to live fully in the "real" world with all its messes and glories. Most, however, choose a location to receive their mail, and then establish a fold in the worsted of reality, linked with the pseudorealm of Wonderland. It acts as both antechamber and bedroom, locked for that particular Cat's personal use and hidden from prying eyes, of course. Only those she lets in (or those with FAR more power and clevernss than she in Wonderland) may enter.
I remember when first reading this it immediately changed my perception of Cheshire cats from being dizzy children into being clever, smug waifus. I'm just worried I'm not witty enough to keep up with them.
>your cheshire cat wife softly bullies you, and then waits for you to give a comeback before saying, "No, no, you should have said this…"
>Cats may remotely monitor their chosen mate remotely while asleep
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
>Dammit, knew I was forgetting something.
I worry about not being witty enough to write them. Still, I can continue to develop them sure enough. In one Wonderland thread or another, I started developing the pseudorealm itself, but got cut off.
https://web.archive.org/web/20151002110852/http://8ch.net/monster/res/64743.html Found the 2015 Cheshire Threads!
Oh yeah, and I should probably get on the development I had planned: Madness. This is something which happens to every single Wonderlander monster girl, and is linked to that mamono's racial personality. They are affected by it every waking hour of their lives, experiencing lucidity in short bursts. It is not curable, but it can be mitigated through care and interaction. Each kind of Wonderlander has their own unique form of Madness. Cheshire Cats, for example, see all of reality as something to be laughed at. With everything, their minds twist and turn to find the comical absurdity. This makes them brilliant at lateral thinking, but as a result they can have great difficulty approaching what they want "normally." A saner Cheshire will be called boring by her peers.
The Madness typically has a periodic sub condition called Quickening, wherein the mental condition intensifies (or inverts) and the Mamono's body undergoes a physical transformation. The Quickening usually corresponds with celestial phenomena (not necessarily the full Moon, more the placement/alignment of planets and stars). It happens at least once a year, even as often as once a month, and lasts up to twenty four hours. With Cheshires, this condition starts with unusually grim and bleak observations where the "punchline" is increasingly harder to find. The condition worsens as the Cheshire brings up more and more nonsensical observations, then sentences, then phrases, then words, unable to stop grinning and chuckling at them the whole time. Her physical transformation is no less alarming, as her normally clean and smooth coat becomes coarse and matted, her claws knifelike and yellowed, and her mouth inhumanly wide, filled with jagged teeth. There is no mischievous sparkle in a Quickened Cheshire's eyes, only confusion, frustration, sadness, resignation, or (in the case of a Cat experiencing it for the first time) outright fear. Silencing the Cat through a gag or muzzle only stops one of the symptoms, and does nothing for her peace of mind. To grant her that, it's best to keep talking back to her, steering the Cat along with word association games and charades. It's vital that you do this to stop her from panicking or despairing and using her powers in uncontrolled flailing. Thus focused (and you have to keep trying until she can), one word at a time you've given the Cheshire back some control of herself. Once the time has passed, the Cheshire Cat gradually reverts to normal. It goes without saying that couple which make it through their first Quickening without breakup tend to be much stronger for it.
Did I go too far, or does this give even more proper nuance?
>found the 2015 threads
Oh gonnae no.
>There is no mischievous sparkle in a Quickened Cheshire's eyes, only confusion, frustration, sadness, resignation,.. or outright fear.
I think that might be a bit too far. That sounds horrible torture for her. I was thinking about a version of Wonderland where their insanity takes on a darker hue, but more in a way like the movie Westworld.
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
Also, might I suggest Polymorphia as the sound of insanity.
I think I know how to beat a cheshire trying to mess with you.
Hint: Beep boop, I am sad.
Seriously, being a robot would get an annoying faggot cat off you back in no time.
>implying she wouldn't just try all the harder to force you to laugh
I'm pretty sure someone did a comic of that. The Cheshire said something like, "You'd probably be dead without me."
<Yeah, I'm just a burden.
>N-no! I didn't mean it! Please stop being sad!
She's probably hold you down and tickle you.
I sometimes wish I hadn't found monster girls. I knew from a young age I liked the idea of dominant girls, essentially my mind trying to feel it's way through /gfd/. I really can't be happy in a normal style relationship. I think I've just got faulty wiring and I wish I could get it fixed. M-maybe when we die, we'll get to be with our waifus, right?
This, faggot cats are very noncasual and enjoy a challenge.
I had a feeling you'd say that. Mind you, that was sort of the point: Sure, someone you love on the border of genius and madness can make for some uniquely fun times, but it can get really bad when they trip far onto the other side of that border. You take on a Wonderland Waifu with the expectation that the good balances out or exceeds the bad, so my reasoning goes.
> I was thinking about a version of Wonderland where their insanity takes on a darker hue
Okay, this I can get-
>but more in a way like the movie Westworld.
Wait, what? Please explain.
Though sometimes it's flipped.
This one does the job nicely, I gotta say.
Yeah yeah, that was a fuck up on both our ends, I know. Is why I put it in spoilers.
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
Just the idea of them being rainmen-style geniuses doesn't quite go with what I had in mind. I don't see them as insanity, more like whimsy embodied in a cute and fluffy form.
Westworld is a theme park set in 1983 where you get to choose between three worlds, RomanWorld, MedievalWorld, and WestWorld, each of them inhabited by cyborgs who you can fight/have sex with. Sometime near the end of the film the cyborgs begin malfunctioning and start to actually kill the guests instead of letting the guests win. Yul Brynner plays, "The Gunslinger" and hunts down Richard Benjamin. Even following him through RomanWorld and MedievalWorld.
>tfw my borderline, manipulative ex is in the low down state of florida
GOOD LUCK IRMA-CHAN!
He was probably looking for a mamono in a human like everyone else here. But it never works. They're just borderline cunts who destroy lives and are the types who would say you hit them/raped them. (Fortunately didn't happen in my case.)
Sorry, not what I meant, that soundtrack just came to me then. They're quite clever and witty, but that's the extent of it.
Yes, I knew about that, but what do you mean using that as an example of them going off?
Nah, we were just young and dumb when it happened. No bad blood either way.
>Sorry, not what I meant
Right, right, fair enough. But the idea of them being insane by the human definition just sort of kills it for me. Especially the thought of them having mental breakdowns.
Maybe on full moon nights her becoming much larger/fluffier and more aggressive, but not completely devolving into miserable and lingering agony.
The Westworld analogy mainly sprang from Wonderland making me think of the song "The Merry Go Round Broke Down" and imagining if Wonderland denizens became increasingly more demanding for sex/company. I'll admit I didn't really think much else about it. Not so far as to give it a plot.
Ahhh, it feels good to be back on my proper comp.
Hm. Seems we're approaching this from opposite ends. How about a compromise? On Quickening days/nights a Cheshire can get more incoherent and maybe a little less funny, but more in the sense of being lost in thought/her own little world and much less miserably out of control. Word games can help keep her focused…and also ratchet up her libido as she focuses on you. Quickening, it should be said, disperses some of her "civilized" scruples in what follows. Good enough sex or other diverting activity clears her head nicely Impregnation also being more likely. The more monstrous Quickening appearance I'm keeping as is, though. Apart from a little self-consciousness and self-deprecation ("Dearie me, I look like I could take your hand off in one bite, don't I?"), she's fine about that.
The other thing that can get her razor-focused is if another female tries to take her mate from her in that state. Cheshires will not tolerate this in the least, and while it would be "very verily uncivilized" to attack their rival with their bare claws, she will cheerfully inform them that she is not feeling very civilized at the moment. Rumors abound of starved mamono staggering into town days after a Quickening event muttering about mazes and mocking laughter. Bottom line, don't challenge a Cheshire Cat to become a Saber-toothed Tiger.
I have more fantastic Madnesses in mind for Jabberwocks and Alices, though I've only really developed the first of those.
Holy fuck that's cringey as fuck. Why do people do this?
I hate to keep shitting on your idea, but I really just don't like the idea of a nightmare mode Cheshire.
I can imagine some bizarre star alignment causing a startling metamorphosis and she becomes as you described her. Her pinning you to the bed/ground and mounting you, staring down into you with her yellow eyes, now glowing like a cat's when you shine a flashlight on them. Your stomach has that sinking feeling and you shut your eyes to keep from screaming, and very soon you soon feel her shiver from climaxing and she lowers her warm body down onto your chest. By the time you open your eyes to peek out at her, she's already back to normal, napping on top of you with a content little smile.
Now imagine every mamono did that. And the evening of it, you can feel the energy ripping through the air like gusts of wind. It's like standing in a field during a lightning strike. Night is like a black curtain descending on the earth, all of the lamps in the houses of the village seem to die at the same time, and every husband in whatever room he finds himself in immediately slinks back into a corner, or behind a curtain, and is just sure he feels something's watching him.
When the light finally breaks through the curtains and rosy-fingered dawn brings a protective illumination to the village men, they all go to the tavern, or to tea time in their special little meeting places where the mamono seem a little mutually embarrassed by what happened. Maybe a few are a little amused, smugly staring at their husbands, who are all trying to avoid looking at each other, mostly at the ground.
So I can definitely appreciate the idea, just something about it doesn't sit right with me. It takes something away from the magic of mamono.
>magic of mamono
As I see it, nightmare Cheshire takes the /monster/ ideal to the hilt: Taking something blood-freezingly scary and making a night of passion of it (or at the very least endearing). The way you described the event going sounds quite good even to you. So what's the problem with it?
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
Yeah I did get a bit into it.
I don't know, maybe it adds a seriousness to it? I think the only time there should be seriousness is if you knock into an Oni and make her spill her drink. Even then I think something amusing should come of it. Maybe your Cheshire would do something whacky back to her. (I tried to think of something amusing but I couldn't.)
its a catgirl not some eldrict spawn. Remember this, at least get the characterization right.
Pretty sure I was the one making that point, pilgrim.
That was never disputed. However, Wonderlanders are all creatures of dreams and consciousness, as is their home. And dreams, as well we know, can shift to nonsense and nightmare with ease.
Well, the point of these rewrites is to make the monsters closer to fantasy races in their own right, albeit with some emphasis on their sexual habits (and also the fact that they're all-female races). I'm the sort of fellow who likes his tea bitter and savory, so to speak, even if I like some sweetness. Though really, Quickening!Cheshire is the same mischievous cat you know and love… just a little weirder, less "civilized," and more thrilling to look at. What can I say, bedding a gal with a mouthful of sharp teeth grabs me.
You haven't seen my take on Jabberwocks, have you? Their Madness is Hubris, borne from their powerful and nearly invincible bodies, and the propensity for cruelty that comes of that. "Wild" ones can be said to behave like vicious hentai supervillains like Smaug, but with rape as well as devastation, while "domestic" ones born into human locales tend to be haughty ojous if they aren't raised right, they can turn into the former type. Courting one is similar to what a Lizard does plus something of Pygmalion, but they take it further. Would you like me to show you what I've got so far? I fell into a bit of a slump late last year, so it's not quite finished.
What I have in mind for the Alices is the Madness of Childishness. This is to say, no matter how long they live or how they look, they never grow out of that youthful and ever-curious mindset. Their Quickening inverts that somewhat.
Plz make more Jabberwocky stuff, I need it for reasons.
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
First I'll need to salvage it, then I can make more of it. Starting…
"Worthless lavender trrramp, you thought you could guide your host past ME? And YOU, huuuuHAHAHAHAHaaaarrrgh, you came here for What? Mysteries, carnal frivolities, maybe a moment's company to fill your pointless life? Hahahaaargh, but perhaps your life DOES have a point now: to serve MY pleasure, and MY appetite! You should feel HONORRRED, chhhild of Man! You will die in the ecstasy and terror only a Jabberwock can bring!"
Of all the creatures found in Wonderland, few are more feared and hated than the Jabberwock. A subspecies of Dragon altered by the pseudorealm's weirdling magic, Jabberwocks differ in both physiology and psychology: they are all vainglorious, haughty, vicious, cruel, and full of craft. Where dragons are proud creatures, Jabberwocks take their egomania to excessive extremes, all existing for either their conquest or their gratification (the only exception being the Queen of Hearts, one of only two things they fear). Their madness is not without cause, for they are the strongest entities in Wonderland.
Theirs are the claws that catch, and the multiple jaws that can either pleasure or rend apart.
The Jabberwock's physical strength and durability are both exponentially greater than that of a typical dragon. They are also swifter, and their reflexes are constantly honed to near-perfection.
More visible, however, are the two additional limbs emanating from out of the Jabberwock's lower back (giving them a grand total of nine appendages, not counting the head). These are a pair of sinuous necks ending in rounded reptilian jaws, disturbingly humanlike teeth glistening within, the Jabberwock's secondary mouths. From these maws comes one of the dragon's most potent weapons, a pinkish haze reeking of blood and roses (whether white or red, the Queen could not be reached for comment). This pink haze drives any man who strays in it into a passionate fury, forcing him to engage the Jabberwock in her chosen forms of combat. Thus, whether he was fearful of the dragon, or ready and aroused, he will be unable to retreat once exposed.
The main mouth of the Jabberwock is filled with knife-like rending teeth, often used in the coup de grace, or if the dragon is in a particularly sadistic mood.
A Jabberwock relishes a fight. It enjoys dominating the engagement from start to finish, showing off by grabbing polearm blades with their bare claws, snapping plate mail with well-placed bites, and powering through offensive magic like it was merely a strong wind. More than a fight, however, a Jabberwock enjoys the spoils of victory. Anything of value on the victims' persons will be removed and placed on display in the dragon's manor-cave. It is here also that the Jabberwock will have her way with any surviving captives. Man, woman, human or Mamono, the Jabberwock will violate them, forcing them to sing her praises on pain of immediate execution. Should their voices give out, the Jabberwock will gleefully take their head off, before consuming their body at their leisure. If there are multiple captives, there is a strong chance that the Jabberwock will allow one to live, and even escape, on the condition that they spread the tale of her fearsome might, and how any other woman is ruined for them.
Should another dragon, whatever the type, enter the Jabberwock's territory, she will do everything in her power to humiliate and break the wyrm, taking special delight in the act if they have a close mate.
It is said that a being of such cruelty cannot have a heart. By magical edict of the Queen, this is true… up to a point. There is only one way to give a Jabberwock a heart, and it is a way those dragons will fight tooth-and-claw to prevent.
>I'm the sort of fellow who likes his tea bitter and savory
I like mine with about 5 teaspoons of sugar.
Oh baby. Pic related
"I DON'T KNOW WHAT WE'RE DEALIN WITH HERE, MAN, CAUSE WE MIGHT JUST BLOW THE WHOLE UNIVERSE UP, MAN."
>plus something of a Pygmalion
I don't understand. I'm familiar with Pygmalion. The original waifuist. But the analogy there eludes me.
I'll read that now.
I couldn't get through the first part without getting up and dicking around with other things. The idea of some overgrown mollusk ripping away the waifu you pined over for so long makes my blood boil. Probably just autism or something.
How do you stop this creature? Suppose you went back like Ash from Evil Dead. What would a rubber bullet do here?
I laugh even as I wat.
Gooood. Anger at what a Jabberwock does is natural and should make what comes next easier to take. But now, the answer to your question. Read on:
Polearms do not faze a Jabberwock. Arrows make a Jabberwock laugh. Spears draw scorn from the Jabberwock. And handgonnes, well, a bit of pain, but really it will only make the dragon mad. But the sword is another thing entirely. The moment a Jabberwock spots a swordwielder, she regards his weapon with utmost scrutiny. That kind of blade is the only weapon a Jabberwock fears, but contrary to what certain scholars would tell you, it must be steel, and above all it cannot have so much as a scratch on the cutting edge or point. Such a sharpened, perfect sword deserves the title Vorpal, and is recognized as such by the ancient magic of Wonderland.
Should she spot the weapon, the Jabberwock will move with all of her strength and speed to eliminate the wielder first. She will not bother to capture them. Instead she will render them into so much mincemeat and devour them (snapping the sword into multiple pieces for insurance). This is therefore a guaranteed duel for the Vorpal wielder's life, and the ultimate test of their skill. Merely possessing such a flawless blade will not save them. From that point on, the wielder must either slash or stab into the flesh of the dragon's chest with killing force. They will know they have struck true when the "snicker-SNAK" of an immense metal lock shakes the wielder's bones, and the agonized shriek of the Jabberwock fills their ears.
Boiling, steaming blood will spray directly from the dragon's heart onto the wielder, scalding indelible marks on their skin (and, unbeknownst to them, their soul). The Jabberwock bleeds for the first time in her life, a disturbing moment for a creature of her power. In her shock, the dragon sinks to her knees. In her agony, she bows her head. Both of these involuntary actions are coded by the Queen's magic, so that they automatically face the Vorpal wielder. The Jabberwock becomes aware of this detail only after it is already too late to change direction.
Naturally, the Jabberwock's first impulse will be to fly into a destructive rage. Except that such an impulse wars with a variety of new feelings: wonder. The Vorpal wielder is the first being to ever draw blood from the Jabberwock in combat. The first glimmers of respect join the fight. A hint of fear wells up; the Jabberwock realizes that she is mortal. Questions, so many questions arise, particularly with regard to the alien warmth that comes with looking on her opponent.
Physically, the Jabberwock is the same, a towering, extra-limbed, beautiful monstrosity of scales and horns. In terms of who she is, the dragon has just begun to grow. The last part of this peculiar rite (for that is what it is) consists of the Jabberwock looking her Vorpal wielder in the eye and calmly asking them to finish her, if they so desire. True, this choice has ended a Jabberwock half the time… the other half, however, has the wielder spare her, as much out of confusion as compassion. From that point onwards, the wielder of the Vorpal sword and the Jabberwock will begin a bizarre and dangerous courtship, one which makes the attentions of a Cheshire Cat seem positively tame at times.
Will post more in the coming day, comp needs rest (and so will I).
oh, its that autist again
Mollusk just sounded right.
I admittedly didn't realize the references to Lewis Carroll until I looked up "vorpal." This is a good story for people who like jabberwockies. I still feel like a Cheshire cat could fumble her up somehow.
>that autist again
Who is it that you think you're talking to? A group of sitcom characters who are going to banter back with you? Fucking hell, m8
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
She probably could, at least in an enclosed area. Out in the open is more risky.
Putting aside the fact that we are all autists here, he had the chance to gripe at me last year. Evidently he failed to take it. Now then…
Picture if you will a certain handsome, cruel, egomaniacal young noble from a far-off land.
This is the rough starting point from where the Vorpal wielder's Jabberwock companion shall begin. Empathy and compassion are alien concepts, ones which will repel her as seeming unreasonably weak. The Jabberwock respects the wielder for their strength and skill in besting her, and is keenly interested in finding out more about that man and why he spared her. She will also not allow any other force to take his life. This by no means suddenly changes her into the perfect loving mate. In fact, the wielder may find himself regretting having stayed his hand.
The Jabberwock will enquire and investigate every detail of her new companion, using everything from casual prodding to cajoling/interrogating friends and family (either through disguise or through bullied intermediaries, either way, the Jabberwock can quickly become a creature of craft and superficial charm). Usually such questioning comes over tea, or weekly requests for sparring. Once she has uncovered enough information, the dragon will commence the next stage of her courtship: harrowing. The Jabberwock begins to play on the wielder's insecurities and flaws, often after seemingly innocent calls to sparring matches. As her remarks become more vicious and cutting, so too do her strikes become more aggressive, less and less restrained. Her aim is to see whether the wielder gives into despair (which will draw mocking laughter and potentially an injuring blow), or instead flies into a rage (which will excite her). Either outcome will typically result in the match ending with the pair on the ground, nose-to-nose and in each other's arms (though with the positioning determined by the outcome).
Almost never will the Jabberwock predict the wielder coming to peace with their inner demons. In the event that this happens, the dragon will be so baffled and surprised that she will often outright lose the sparring match. Immediately after that, the invariable huffy response is "I, [insert Jabberwock's name], 'let' you do that. Don't get ideas, worm, they do not suit you."
This is typically the point at which the harrowing stage ends. The Jabberwock has to settle down for few days and think over what this means. During this time, she will be somewhat absentmindedly affectionate, though pointing this out to the dragon is typically not a wise idea. The next stage is less emotionally traumatic, but physically is another matter: pecking order.
Out in the open certainly could just become invisible? I imagine she can teleport as well. I wonder if she can shapeshift?
The enclosed space just makes me imagine filling a small room with about 10 faggot cats, all invisible, all naked. Maybe there's something you have to retrieve from the room? I don't know, I'm not sure how to make that into anything interesting, it's just neanderthal-tier brainwaves on my part. I'm fairly content with imagining all the giggling and getting pushed back and forth between them. I wonder if there would be entire villages of cheshires?
>we are all autists
It's a very unhappy reflection that we're essentially doing the exact same thing FNAF autists do, except we do it with well and with love and a lot of very good writefags on here too. There's a difference between our autism and theirs. It's Kung Fu vs. Kick Boxing.
This Jabberwocky is pissing me off, my man. I feel like someone needs to commission jabberwocky degradation hentai. What does the Jabbercuck do when she Quickens?
Hooold it there dude, it got better last time.
H'what, which part?
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
Now is when a Jabberwock takes on a new question, which the Vorpal wielder must answer if they are to live: Who's really in charge here?
This question is provoked by how many instances in a relatively short amount of time the wielder has made her question herself. Now that the shock and musing have worn away, the Jabberwock feels another new emotion: Anger. And it is wrath laced with excitement.
The first act of the phase is an intense scrutiny on the dragon's part, studying every square inch of the Vorpal wielder's body (with a…mostly clinical detachment). At sunrise, the wielder will find his Vorpal blade impaled at the peak of the nearest mountain (or tall tree, if no mountains are about). It is clearly visible, but will require much toil to reach.
Before he can possibly go after it, however, the Jabberwock swoops down, rose-tinted mist surrounding her like an aura before spreading out. It is here that she announces her intent, to test the man behind the sword. All sparring will now be done hand-to-claw, all day, every day, until either the wielder breaks down, he wins, or both combatants collapse. Should the first of these events happen, the Jabberwock states that she is as liable to devour him as make him a slave.
The dragon allows for a period of time to properly wake up, and then the duel begins. Before besting her, the wielder will have already been strong. Practicing with the blade against her will have made him faster and more focused. His mind is resilient, having triumphed against her own cruel wit and insight. He will need all of that accumulated strength and skill to survive, and more: the Jabberwock's bloody mark on his soul allows him a limited degree of mirroring precognition, along with a resistance to the fogging effects of her mist (or any other creature with similar abilities).
And none of these things guarantee a victory. But they do make it possible. This is the Jabberwock's last chance to turn away from what they are becoming. It is also the final turn of the key, if she is to have a heart.
We are the masters of autistic Teratophilia, they are children playing with the idea.
And good, because what happens next will involve Jabberwock pain.
Physically, she comes to resemble classic pictures of the Jabberwocky, complete with membranous "goggles" over her eyes and elongated limbs (including the neck). Mentally, one of two things can happen: a profound state of perceived solipsism (to point she doubts even her Vorpal Wielder's existence and has to be forcibly "reassured"), or a reversion to villainous type a la Majin Vegeta. The second is mercifully rarer, but also leads to much nostalgia in the aftermath.
I kind of like this idea of a jabberwocky.kiki still best girl though
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
Blows fly, fast and hard. The Jabberwock has nine limbs at her disposal, and will use every one of them to fight; claws slashing, jaws snapping, tail slicing, and wings battering. Where she strikes, flesh bruises or tears. Haze chokes or blinds, and hot purple flames roar from her mouth.
The dragon only allows rest for meals and sleep, and will only allow rudimentary medical care for wounds that will kill the wielder quickly if not tended to, willpower or no willpower (open arteries, for instance). Yes, they tend to look unduly alarmed should this happen—for a half-second, then it's back to a fanged snarl. During this clash of wills, the wielder's healing may be bolstered. Their powers of recovery are not, however, which necessitates the rest. The Jabberwock increasingly needs it too as the days go on, as the link between the two solidifies
The longer the duels go, the more talkative the Jabberwock gets. The following is recorded from the tale of one pairing, and may not represent all of them.
>"Grrrrgh, you really thought you were special, softling wretch? PFAH! The only thing you knew how to do was wield a sword when first you met me! You were useless otherwise!"
>"Looook at what you are trying to accomplish, you puling fool. You could barely survive me with your sword, how do you dare hope to win without it? Futile, futile, FUTIIIIIILE! RAAAAAAAAAGH!"
>"YOU…! That was…rrrrr… the second time I've had to help you staunch that artery! Do you understand how… feeble your soft flesh is yet?! What… hope can you have of victory? You will die with your delusion!"
>"Grrraahhhk… A man…-hah- a boy, contesting a dragon…It is as…laughable an idea as a monkey… against a lion. You're bleeding from every limb. Your carotid artery…I've nicked it. I know I cracked your…collar bone in the same pass….I can see the agony in your face and bearing, you miserable fool. Giveupalready. Spare yourself this indignity."
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
What about chloroform or high voltage?
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
>"FOR…-khh!- FOR THE QUEEN'S SAKE-kaff'-urrraggh- WHY?! Why are you doing this to yourself?! IT IS MADNESS…BEYOND-ah- ANYTHING ELSE IN WONDERLAND! -Hnnnnnghh- …What? NO! Worry about your own wounds you suicidal fool! WhatamIsayingwhyaren'tyoutakingadvantageofthem?!"
>"…I….I hate you, huuhhhhgh, so very much-wheeeeze-Why can't you just…hmnnhh…lie down and die? Why…do you have to… torture me like this? I shouldn't even c-care, much less mind the sight offf-fudgeagh- ofyourbrokenbody. GrrrrrrRRAA-YOU'VEINFECTEDMEYOUSOFTLITTLEBASTARD-KAaugh! I'll kill you-huuuhh-I'llkillyou,I'llkillyou,I'llkillyouI'lldoitquickasIcanIpromise…"
>"…If you'll STOP it and LET ME! HheeeeghIDON'TCAREABOUTTHEPECKINGORDERANYMORE! Heeeehhuuuuheeeehhfuuuuuuhisssssssss… Please. Your right-hsssss- right lung is punctured, every bone in your buh-Koff-body is riddledwithfractures, you've lost a pint of blood today… Let me put you out of our misery. That'ssssss the most you're going to get-thhee-get out of me. I'm not going to beg you. The salt water…running from my eyes issss painful…enough. I…Will…"
>"…wha-what? you…you…you belong here…you're mad enough to…IhateyousobadlyIcouldexplodeyouingrate-Ah…!…that's a bruise… on my skin…? That'ssssuuuuhhh…your last punch. Heheheheh… you couldn't…-gllp-cuddent bead me in de end…-snffft-I'll make it quick…my dear, stupid…swordsman…I'll remember….hrrrrrrr…rr…ah….?"
>At this point, both combatants collapsed from a combination of exhaustion and their wounds.
Eh? As methods of rendering unconsciousness? Chloroform would probably make her drowsy, but she'd have to already be tired for it to knock her out. High voltage might not kill her, but it will make her wings crispily useless.
I'm gonna get a voice actress to make all of those noises, you wait and see.
I'm starting to feel like the Jeb!berwocky(please clap) is just a sexualised version of the Creeper.
Ha. Never seen that movie, but you might be getting somewhere.
Was that enough suffering for you at the moment?
Aye I've had enough of her.
Back to best girl.
Though sometimes I worry that she isn't the type that's hardcore enough to slam her husband down and rape him HARD
>Who's really in charge here?
LOAD EM ABOARD, I'LL CALL IT IN
>having so little life experience
How long would a cheshire keep going if she deals with a guy who obstinately refuses to have fun or acknowledge her pranks?
How would she feel if the reason he ignores her and oughtright denies her presence is because he has mild schizophrenia and is desperately trying to assure himself that the floating smile and phantom voices aren't real?
I'm making a story about this.
Once I get home, I might post something involving the Queen of Hearts. Yes, it's part of the Jabberwock thread, but we're out of suffering territory now.
Eager to see it.
Listening to Last Christmas made me make this.
>tfw no Cheshire to keep me warm this Christmas
>tfw we'll never get out waifus and this board is just agony
>tfw I still somehow secretly believe it's gonna happen, and I think that might be legitimate mental illness
And here I thought you were keen on avoiding mental illness.
>A cheshire will never call you her favorite meme
I'd like to.
>tfw ywn have to search around the house because your cheshire cat fell asleep while invisible
>ywn never get to blow on a cheshire's ears to pester her
>ywn feel your cheshire kitten wrap her little paw around your finger to "hold your hand."
>ywn feel those big warm paws resting on your chest
>ywn never get to feed each other ice cream
I'm having this idea for a Halloween themed mamono story, it can't really take flight as it stands. But it's about bringing Halloween to Wonderland, and deciding how not to offend the mamono, and eventually deciding that the husbands will go as whatever their wives are, and the wives will dress like humans and make fun of how weak and needy they are.
Manticore: Hey look at me, "Oh sweety, could you please open this jar for me?" pfffthahaha
"Gee, miss, would you like to go on a date with me?" HAHAHAHA
Which meme are you?
Pic related is me, my dude. Top that.
>All these never ever fags
You better get to work on opening that portal real fucking quick, science nigger.
>Which meme are you?
>Pic related is me, my dude. Top that.
Big talk from a barknigger.
Get on my level.
Where are the waifus then?
Piping hot OC.
Couldn't figure out which version was better.
But you still jus' a street nigga less you makin' yo own memes, dawg.
Masonic dubs is rite. Where are the waifus? The Democratic People's Republic of Nog Korea has until 5PM tomorrow to deliver me my waifu, or else.
Haven't the wizards from the eclipse given an update?
I suppose we have until the 23rd
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
September is starting out just as bumpy as was foretold. However, wasn't something big supposed to happen today? I know Florida is getting fugged, but a few states up we're still pretty coe-zee.
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
>Halloween in Wonderland
>All Hallows' Eve in the realm of dreams, mentality, and zeitgeist
Ohhhhh boy. That's just asking for centuries if not millennia of imagery and monsters associated with that singular day to come crawling out of the wormwood.
In the depth of sleep, the couple will have strange and often very specific dreams (some details will vary, of course, but there are some constants). They will first be conscious of their seats, a pair of plush and comfortable armchairs. To their location, a seemingly endless marble hall bedecked in blood red, chalk white, and jet black. Before them is a throne, or rather the knowledge of said throne being there; they can't look up, not even with their eyes. Clocks tick, hearts beat.
The Vorpal Wielder finds his sword back in his hand, but now its edge is serrated like a key on both sides. He will also notice that his hands are encased in very familiar dark scales… and his body in a smart but strange sort of suit think Victorian gentry, coat-with-tails and top hat included. The Jabberwock, meanwhile, first notices a monstrous black padlock over her heart, seemingly attached to her. It smokes gently, and is open. Next… that her hands have the smooth skin of her body, and her teeth fit strangely. Finally, she notices the modest (and layered) white dress and veil covering her from head to sharpened toe.
From the throne-that-must-be-there comes a woman's laugh (ranging from a low and sensuous titter to a high and childish giggle and everything in-between), and then words. The voice typically remarks on how the pair have been expected, gives congratulations on their choice, and then offers to officiate their union. After all, at this point they might as well be married.
It is only at this juncture that the pair are allowed speech. Reactions are typically a combination of loud, confused, outraged, and bewildered.
Well there are at least 3 different ways we can get our waifus,
1. Portal opening (highly unlikely)
The chances of this happening is 1 in a 1,000,000,000, and can only really happen in a super advanced sci-fi setting or if the entire world is united in the name of Ammit.
2. Bio-engineering (Maybe, but still unlikely)
I don't know how many human woman would be willing to undergo a transformation that would not only make them look less like themselves, but also change their brain chemistry to the point of brainwashing. Also super-high tech.
3. Robots (Most likely route)
Robotics is advancing at a rate that is unprecedented, faster than it has ever been. The tech necessary to create an at least somewhat realistic waifu is just around the corner and in the future, i'm willing to bet that there will be a market for it, no matter what the Paladykes and Jews say.
No matter what route we take, Ammit will certainly bless our way and ensure our victory.
I want to carve pumpkins with my cheshire daughterus and do this trick for them to make them giggle. I bet even a Cheshire would wonder how you do it. (Just light a match, hold it with your teeth, but breathe in hard enough to keep the flame sideways/parallel.)
>Portal opening unlikely
I know, but I feel like somehow we could send ourselves there. Let Schlomo rule over his dying planet of mud people.
Like you said, brainwashing would be needed, but likely insufficient. A cocky version of a human woman does not make a Cheshire cat. The fluffy paws, invisibility, and all the personality quirks that come along with her do.
Probably. Tay, nevar forget.
I'm gonna knock out, I hope you all have dreams about Cheshire cats and LEAVING HUMANITY BEHIND.
Have you so easily lost your faith in Ammit and Reitia? Our waifus will not be made from metal and machineunless they're an android or automaton they will be living breathing flesh and blood and we shall take joy in spending time with them and they us. Do not forsake hope men! Regardless of how slim the chance may be or how depressing this world may become, so long as we keep the love of our waifus in our hearts nothing shall be beyond our reach!
>Not wanting a robot
Besides, you could always go for synth flesh if you like. Seriously, all this anti-robutt sentiment is making me feel uncomfortable in my waifu.
I've nothing against robots. But I want to share my life with my waifu, not leave her alone after I pass because she will not die like I will.
>Not programming her to self-destruct upon your death so that you two can be together in the fields of rye
Bump because 8chan fucked up again
you forgot inter dimensional crusading.
The moment we get any possibility of inter dimensional travel, the infinite multiverse of waifus will be ours.
I was the one still holding out on a portal, my man. If I recall, some anons said that in the infinite array of possibilities, there could be millions of universes where our waifus want us as much as we want them. How could we resonate our souls to sync with them? Can't at least one of their universes have the power to open up to us?
This is what I mean.
Not crusading, however.
Well, maybe Vamp Mosquitos should be gassed.
>but a few states up we're still pretty coe-zee.
For now. There's another hurricane about to slap the entire east coast over the next 7-8 days.
Jose? ICE should handle that one.
Made another one.
Do a Jabberwock and her jaws have different appetites? How much food do they consume?
Where's Lovecraft anon?
This is from the Antarctic Oasis thread on /pol/.
(Many warm caverns have been found, rooms where you could "wear a t-shirt and be comfortable.")
Isn't the elder sign a branch or a warped star?
So the Elder Sign is like a scrunched up version of the Italian hand thing?
Lovecraft originally described it as a swastika.
Lots of anons have been making contact with spirit waifs, and it's been reported that Ammit is currently building a whole afterlife world and is making mamono daughters.
I'd say that the "mouth-limbs" are mainly for gripping, dispensing mist, and maybe cleaning. Closed systems, in other words. Jabberwock herself is carnivorous. She can messily consume multiple wild boars per day (or at least two whole humans). She grows steadily more dainty about that as time passes.
My my. That sort of place could easily play host to civilizations, if there was also a ready source of food in there.
I like to believe Hitler is alive somewhere down there. Getting swole. Making mamono real.
Someone's introduced me to an artist who does some of the best Cheshire drawings I have ever seen. But they're all futas. Every last one of them. In some of them it isn't easy to tell. They're good enough I'm tempted to airbrush the bulges out.
I think I'll try removing the cocks in the morning.
How many times in human history has that been said?
These pictures are so good, it's such a shame he has to add the dicks to everything and make them /monster/ unfriendly.
He should do things like Shadman, make one version with the dick, one without. Then everyone's happy.
I think there's versions of this character without the dick. I know I seen a few but if I can find them I'll contribute it to here.
That's true. I doubt he really cares and I on one hand don't entirely blame him.
I'll be looking for it. I'm gonna work on making some alterations later on.
Here's his pixiv:
That one is still pretty obvious
I know, anon. I know.
Neither of those are mine, by the way. Or these.
Don't stop, /monster/.
Patience, he's trying to fix it.
We should have a thread dedicated to this.
>I had a great day
>it's friday evening
>just found a new awesome futa artist, on /monster/ of all places
Nice. Thank you very much for sharing, anon.
Right, even since I'd made so many posts explicitly stating my intent to remove it. Wherever the hueniggers goes, he must chimp.
They have threads like that on /d/, except they slap them on.
I actually considered requesting /d/ help edit them out, but they would have just made the dick bigger– more powerful
I don't think I'm mature enough for those images.
Are Cheshire cats and Manticores partners in smug?
Some OC for your shitposting needs
>Not recognizing the superiority of 100% girls
If this is bait, no (you)'s 4 u
How many chickens does this man have on his computer?
<brah, I got all da chicks
Sports fans are the most intelligent people on the Earth.
It seems Ed has found our board.
>Your Cheshire cat wife finds a copy of The Headless Horseman by Washington Irving and demands you roleplay as Ichabod and her as the Horseman
>She takes off her head and leaves it on the table
>Wraps her big warm fluffy paw around your hand and leads you outside
>She points at the horse
>"P… Please don't bring horses into this."
>She rests her hands on her hips
>"This is just silly, can't we just have sex inside?"
>She still just stands there
>You reluctantly hop on and ride off
>Her headless form chases you down the path
>Through the clearing and under the dark, twisted tree limbs
>The fantastical forestry of Wonderland, it's massive mushrooms, it's flowers shaped like tea cups, all look like mere dots as you fly by it with intense eagerness.
>She finally over takes you and pulls you onto her horse, holding you in front of her with one arm, and holding the reins with the other.
>She stops the horse and dismounts
>She picks you up and pushes you to the ground and yanks down your pants
>You look around to make sure that no one is looking, you want to tell her to slow down a bit but know that she wouldn't listen
>She places her two big paws over your chest and mounts you, driving you into over and over again, her body arching with pleasure, the only real sign of her satisfaction other than her tail jolting around as she pumps every bit of cum out of you
>She lays your exhausted body on the saddle
>Mounts her horse, again holding you in front of her, and rides back home
>She reattaches her head
>"What have you been up to, Schoolmaster? You look so tired, maybe we should go to bed, let me help you with all those clothes…"
It is such a great shame that Lovecraft seemed to think humans were nothing but insignificant lumps of protein, moving about on the surface of this planet like dust mites on a mantle place. When he was so right about the manifold of other questions and topics.
Believe it or not I meant to sage.
Pssh, baseball fans were among the first modern autists.
Speaking of that…
The couple quickly explodes into a flurry of questions. These range the gamut from what the "groom" is wearing, to why the chairs are so comfortable, to who the speaker is (which the Jabberwock will answer swiftly in a fearful hiss). Inevitably, however, the subject of wedding vows, the peal of bells, and white rice will be raised.
For convenience sake, we once again turn to the earlier account:
> "…Your illustrious crimson-white Majesty, if I might be so bold… this must surely be a most ingenious Royal jest, and if so, I will happily bear the part and play it to the hilt. It is but a jest, is it not? …No. It is…not in jest. Well done, your Majesty, marvelous judgment in keeping with the standards of the realm-Areyououtofyourblessedmind?! WHY?!"
Altar jitters notwithstanding, my dear Jabberwocky, the bonds you two share would make even a blighted Shoggoth blush
I've been meaning to ask something for a while: are you that Cosmonaut guy that used to post or is this a different anon with a kraken flag?
What happens when you add alcohol to a Wocky's diet?
Its more complicated.
Oh so Lovecraft died in '37. I was thinking something like 1933 for some reason, and so I assumed it was unlikely he would have thought of the swastika in association with the big man himself.
I guess that's the trouble with it being fictional, there is no true symbol.
Absolutely /deviantart/-tier, but I tried.
>I guess that's the trouble with it being fictional, there is no true symbol.
Well there are two true symbols, one newer and one older and two false symbols made up because people are too chicken shit to use the swastika as the elder sign.
Also in one or two stories Lovecraft used the phrase "they made the cross" and turned it into "they made the elder sign", which is where the idea for the hand sign comes from.
The swastika is of course real, but which is the other one?
I'm thinking the star? As above, so below, something like that? I'm not as well read on alchemy and esotericism as I would like to be yet, I'm still burning through the Greeks.
I though this was a porn board.
Anon, the title of the board directly states it as being a "Romance" board.
>Absolutely /deviantart/ tier drawing
the difference between the drawfagging and the faggotcat is you'll improve over time.
>not knowing hand holding and head patting is the lewdest of lewds
P-please check hitler dubs.
I wish I had more cheshire porn for you anon-kun.
Oh that is so saved, dubsman.
Oh shit sorry, anon.
Thanks, I've seen in my brief browsing of the drawfag thread a lot of people doing a "a drawing a day".
So I think I might give it a shot. At least I never fell for GOMAD.
polite sage for multi-post
Is there a Russian artist drawing these or something?
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
Anon leaves Wonderland for the first time in a year to visit a friend who stayed in their home village.
>His Cheshire wife was very excited to see non -Wonderland-improved humans interacting in their natural habitat, so she stared into the crowd with an amused fascination.
>Anon was overwhelmed with excitement, suddenly grabbing a dullahan from a table, leaving her head beside her ale, and began to swing her body around in a waltz as warm music poured into our ears.
>I wasn't sure how a human was practicing such magic, perhaps he and his wife were so close that she was able to sense his desires and would act them out for him. Or maybe it was the other way around.
>The barmaid quickly rebuked him,
>"This isn't Wonderland, you frilly alp. Break a single one of Mrs. Danukistein's tables and I'm gonna crack yer skull, tea boy." The ogre angrily hissed.
>He let go of the girl and she began spinning dizzily back to her table before resting uncomfortably in her seat.
>His eyes very quickly found mine peering out from a booth in the corner of the tavern and for a for a moment his joy almost seemed to be cut by a solemn judgement.
>He strode very coolly over to my dim booth, his arm wrapped around with his wife's, who was still entertaining herself by watching the humans of the tavern laugh, argue, and some even vomiting while the ogre girl threatened to crush them.
Welp, that's all I've got.
>his eyes very quickly found mine
>he strode very coolly
Then where are you getting them?
You are the artist
Anyone on the board who can translate these?
>Implying a board with around 100 posters has a russian when the majority are US
>Anyone on the board who can translate these?
Yes. They all say vodka, vodka, Boris Yeltsen.
Nah, in all seriousness, I don't know. I ran the Anubis ones through Jewgle translate some time back, and this is what I got:
Your First pic:
>Anubis: My task is to protect Pharaoh's troops and the territory around the nicknames from intruders
>Other text: In other, not a fact that terrifies
>P.S. Actuated only for men
Your Second Pic:
>Anubis: I believe, the judge of the first man is obvious
>But the second …
My first pic:
>Anubis: I figured out that the offender appears about once every six months, and with a probability of 70% is a man
>By the way, it's time to make a schedule and a list of cases for another month ahead
>Sphinx: What? Semiannually?!
>I will always remain in the old maidens forever! What kind of inJUSTICE, all these adventurers?
My Second pic:
>Anubis: What a claim?! These men I caught, and what to do with them, too, I decide!
>Sphinx: Haha, guys, thanks for worrying about me… I'm fine, really…
My Third Pic:
>Congratulations on the acquisition of her husband's mummy # 21
You can get the basic idea of what they're saying in a few of them. There are two others, also involving an anubis, that has text (I haven't run those through translate), and one where an anubis is getting fingered by an undine that are all by the same artist, but this should probably be taken to a separate thread since this is getting too off-topic.
truly the /monster/hood is spreading its influence across the world
embrace this brotherhood
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
Russians have been into it for a while now.
>tfw no uralskie pelmeni skits with monster girls
Also I never knew there were anime conventions in Russia.
Hey. Wanna write a dream sequence?
Man, she sort of has the look but the 3DPD holds her back. Ger face can never look like this.
What kind, mang?
Also, if you want to, cross your eyes while looking at that post, and it will combine the two pictures into one odd face.
Alternatively, for a 3D regular cheshire, cross your eyes here for the same effect.
In a mamono world, instead of TPing a house, do you just have those creepy little spider girl daughterus web up someone's house?
>house is web'd
>try to knock it all down with a broom
>get stuck in the web
>Cheshire comes outside, pretends she doesn't see you
>"W-we could go inside and have sex?"
>"Where could he be…?" she sings
>"We can have sex twice, and do that thing you like where I blow on your ears"
>"Oh there you are, silly."
Those are wlper's pics http://mgewiki.com/index.php?title=Special:Search&profile=images&search=wlper&fulltext=1
That >>315474 pic is saying "Finish drawing me, (I can't because) I have PAWS" which is a reference to russian catmeme with cats refusing to do something by saying "do X yourself, I have PAWS"
The Cheshire kind, of course (Rewrite type).
I appreciate it. That's sort of cute in a way. Now dI want to see a Cheshire cat version of "proofs"
I'm interested, certainly.
Alright then, could some kind/bored/autismal anon give it a try?
I would give it a shot but currently I am shot.
Help me understand the dream sequence. Is it a Cheshire dreaming? Or her husband's reverie as a Cheshire breathes her warm breath into his soft ear?
Thanks friend, interesting to know that Russians have their own lolcats going
Could you be bothered to translate
I'm really curious as to what they say
Idea is that they're having a shared dream.
Where did you get those pics?
Hmm. I suppose it's her powers causing it unintentionally causing it to happen, their heads resting against each other. That, or she could be cuddling him from behind and whispering in his ear in her sleep.
>Even slavs recognise who best girl is
Let's call for a union between the US, Russia and japland. A collaboration to make our waifus reality
>yw hold your monstergirl eventually
>yw be happy and fulfilled as you mg's flood through the protals
>yw be loved, held, and sexed up good in your preferred fashion by your favourite monstergirl
>yw have a long, happy life with your personal best girl in this life or the next
mfw i can't into english on second line
>Russians, japs, and Americans working together to make the world better
I would not be opposed to this
I made a thread on /cats/, go there and shitpost about best girl:
>Being a simp for 3D
At what age does a monster daughteru's strength surpass average human levels?
Does romancing a Wonderland's monster give you some title of nobility by the Queen of Hearts?
Can you romance the queen of hearts?
You'd have to get all the way to her throne without getting raped by another monster girl first.
I have played enough metal gear,I'm a stealth master,i'll be fine.
The question is who paid you to grab dr. pavel
Does the Queen of Hearts pay Cheshire cats a salary? If a Cheshire marries a man, wouldn't she stop guiding other men around Wonderland? Where do Cheshire cats live/how do they afford it?
This drawing in general is low quality, but it has a warmth to it.
Seriously considering making another Cheshire pumpkin this year, but I also really want to see some other anons take a stab at it.
Let's make smug pumpkin waifus together, cuz.
I hope someone makes a serval pumpkin.
I think Kemono is banned. Apparently arguing about whether something should be banned is also banned.
If you make one, I wouldn't mind seeing it.
kemono means furfag in japanese. kemonofriends which is an anime is not fucking banned you retart.
I want to read the rest of American McGee's Alice guy Wonderland fanon.
Just how fucking new are you to not know who serval is?! Lurk moar you fucking newfag
I heard the cheshire autist was posting futa cheshires the other day?
Is there a club or something?
I posted from the waist up pictures of a futa cheshire and said I was going to try to shop the dicks out, anon. I've said this over and over again, my dude. C'mon.
What am I looking at here?
A Gyaru Cheshire and some guy having a 69.
That would have to be her fiance/husband. This is not a guess, but a fact.
AND HE IS WITH US
Why do you post so much without a trip or name on a board with IDs autistnon?
I don't understand, are you angry I'm not a tripfag?
Because the board is slow and I wish it wasn't you fucking jerk off.
I was a little annoyed by what you said, but I didn't want to show it because if I did you'd say I was a sperg, so instead I used casual, friendly language and you still tried to make something out of nothing.
Gyaru is a close relative of ganguro isn't it? It's like the female equivalent of those "Herbivore males" who do their hair blonde.
yeah but you posted a paragraph
explaining yourself and ended up looking like a 'tist
Move aside as I collect all the Cheshires for myself, as I am the rightful husbando of all titty kitties
pic related: The amount of pleasure I will afflict upon the cats
This is you isn't it Sam? Sam I'm gonna raze Texas you fucking mark my words.
Let me try to underail the thread here
Sage because nothing of value has been posted and there are probably more deserving threads.
>no matter how many times he is milked, he'll never run out of semen. It is highly popular as an ingredient in Wonderland sweets.
Remember this part of the manga?
Bumping so that there will be three cheshires on the top page at once.
SMUG PURPLE CUNTS
OFF THIS BOARD
Alright faggots r8 me
>4 god-awful months is this damn jungle
>For 4 months you've been posted in the ass-end of your company as sentry to make sure nothing crawls up it as you make your way back to base
>As an advanced combat/patrol unit you and the rest of the miserable men in the company have seen more than enough encounters with those 'things', those freakish monsters that call themselves 'manono'
>Less than half a year ago, every physicist and well, just about everyone on the planet were left dumb-founded when reports came through of what were described as 'rifts' or 'portals to another world' began to tear open
>At first all we could do was watch and wait. That was, until the monsters came.
>Honest to god, monsters began crawl, scuttle, fly and slither forth from the rifts and began an all out assault on the surrounding human populations
>The most disturbing thing was, they were all female. No exceptions. From animal-human hybrid girls to utterly gargantuan spider-like beasts that seemed physically unstoppable
>Not only were they female be default, their compulsion to capture a human man to breed with was beyond anything ever seen
>In retaliation to their initial, widespread attacks, mandatory conscription was declared in most still-functioning countries to combat these rapist monstrosities
>Which leads to where you are now, sitting in your hide eating MREs, waiting to see if anything was following the tracks left by your company
>Between your mouthfuls of re-hydrated sausage and beans, some movement nearby catches your attention
>Just for a moment, you catch a glimpse of something flick between two trees nearly 30 metres away from where you sat
>You freeze, a piece of sausage balanced on your spoon as you scan the trees for any sign of further movement
>Nothing. Not even the sounds of wildlife can be heard as silence falls. Something is up. Your skin prickles as your free hand reaches for your sidearm
>You nearly piss yourself in fright as a sultry voice whispers in your ear, causing you to leap sideways while firing a shot in the direction of the voice
>In your surge of adrenaline and sheer terror, you barely hear the wet smack and a sharp yelp of pain
> You do however, notice the flecks of blood splatter on your pistol hand and around the window of your hide
>After what felt like hours of deathly silence in the wake of the shattering gunshot, your heartrate slows to a more manageable pace and you begin to pack your things for an immediate departure to report what had happened
>Where there is one, there is always more. After holstering your pistol, you reach for the remains of your lunch that you sent winging in your panic
>It's not there. That's odd. You distinctly remember it being there. A quick look around (inside and out) and it's no-where to be found
>It would seem whatever the hell it was that snuck up on you and nearly scared you half to death, also stole your lunch
>Well, whatever it was, it got a bullet for its troubles which seems like a fair trade to you
>With your gear stowed and hide collapsed for storage, you turn to head out only to stop dead
>Whatever it was, it was still out there. You could "feel" it watching you
>Panicked glances revealed nothing except greenery and trees as you slowly begin to retreat before turning and breaking into a run
>All the while, you fail to notice the pair of bright golden eyes that followed you every step of the way
Fighting it only makes her smugger.
I live in Isle of Wight County in VA. This place lied to me.
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
In my defense, I thought those noises made the event more visceral and easier to imagine.
The next part is something I need to rewrite. I let a silly whim change the character's "voice" and it looks mighty inconsistent in that form.
Ah, I have a fan. Well, old chap, I'll have to make more of it. Fortunately, some of you may have made that possible.
As it's late, I'll make a short note (which may lead to later rewrites) on relations between Wonderland and the Audient Void.
Let it be known that the denizens of Wonderland cordially detest the squamous and noisome inhabitants of that endless place. Despite both being creatures of mentality and dream, every Wonderlander monster knows in the back of her addled head that she would not exist without the human imagination (some of which are cheeky enough to suggest the same applies to more Worldly mamono). The eldritch creatures of the Void have been largely separate from that milieu until recently, and indeed come from neither the World nor Wonderland, but a more alien plane of existence. All mamono from the pseudorealm know instinctively what the Void-dwellers are now, and what they were before they adopted their more humanoid shapes. Their very presence gives them headaches bordering on migraines and full lucidity. Thus, Wonderlanders do not treat them as members of any "civilization," but instead as unwanted interlopers to be expelled from Wonderland by all means available. As it is nigh-impossible to kill a Void-dweller, no half-measures are employed.
It is speculated that some intelligence equal to the Queen of Hearts directs those from the Void, as these creatures somehow keep finding their way into the pseudorealm in very specific areas. For their part, the eldritch mamono insist that they wandered in at random. Their movements are chaotic, but there appears to be a method to their madness. As the incursions into Wonderland and the World increase, the Wonderlanders in turn become more active in Worldly affairs. The dream intrudes and the Void which listens now speaks.
>After what feels like hours of running, you slow to a jog and eventually sag against a tree to catch your breath and rest your racing heart
>You take a swig from your canteen as you begin to process what just happened and start by listing off a few ideas
<First, it can talk, so it's intelligent and most likely a monster. Second, it got right up beside me and I didn't even know it was there and third, it bleeds. If it bleeds, I can kill it
>These three conclusions leave you at loss for ideas aside from run and hope to god that whatever the fuck it was didn't catch up
>You shudder at the idea of an invisible enemy that could be there, any time, anywhere. You hit them though but you got lucky, hopefully it was enough of a hit for them to back off for the two days it would take to catch up to the main force
>Feeling rested and having caught your breath, you set of at a more conservative pace compared to the adrenaline fueled dash of earlier. You had a lot of ground to cover with the possibility of some some invisible nightmare hot on your heels
>As the sunlight began to wane and darkness encroached, you leave the tracks left by the passage of your company and set up your hide in the branches of a fallen tree
>After what had happened earlier, you decide to forgo heating your food as whatever it was may see the light cast by the gas stove and come back for round 2
>While choking down mouthfuls of cold vegetable soup, you begin to wonder why you only encountered the one enemy. They usually traveled in bands containing several different types of monsters. One on its own seemed very odd
<Perhaps it was like me. An advanced scout sent out ahead to warn of approaching forces
>It made sense to send a scout that was invisible. They would be able to see everything they needed at almost no risk to themselves or the larger group
>As you made yourself comfortable, your mind began to wander and you found yourself thinking about the thing you shot
>What did it look like? What else could it do? Where did you hit it?
>Your eyelids grew heavier with each passing question and you settled into your inflatable pillow and into the embrace of sleep
"Heey mister~ Are you awake?"
1st time writefagging so any comments would be helpful
I like it. Though why wouldn't the guy run back the base.
Or is he?
He fucking shot her? Chroist, moite.
Aside from that I have a feeling he and his squadron are getting raep'd so this could be good. Your writing itself is also good.
Speaking from experience, the worst thing about modern Cheshire's is their obsession with onyx and marble making parts of Cheshire look incredibly tacky. Thankfully they seem to have collectively decided that they only want to date footballers. The overpaid idiots of Man U & Liverpool FC may earn millions each week, but they also have to put up with a Cheshire for a wife.
I like it. Some suffering will undoubtedly happen in a story like this, plus it'll be something to make up for later. If anything, wounding her makes Private Anon much more interesting in her eyes. It takes skill to hit a Cheshire gone full stealth.
Do these footballers wind up being a little brighter because of it?
>obsession with onyx and marble making parts of cheshire look incredibly tacky
Do you mean the town of Cheshire?
>Thankfully they seem to have collectively decided that they only want to date footballers. The overpaid idiots of Man U & Liverpool FC may earn millions each week, but they also have to put up with a Cheshire for a wife.
I don't think I get the joke.
I'm glad he seems to be writing the Cheshire as a fun loving trickster and not as a redditor rick and morty fan.
Not sure if you're joking or just don't know (or care) what Cheshire is. PROTIP: It's not a town.
>I don't think I get the joke.
The joke is that IRL Cheshire is home to lots of footballers who get paid far too much money, and their wives/girlfriends are thots who love fake tans and decorating their homes with marble and onyx in the mistaken belief that it makes it look "posh".
>In an instant you explode into motion, gabbing your brush knife and your readied pistol in each hand while launching yourself out of the flaps of the supposedly camouflaged hide
>Heart smashing against your ribcage, eyes darting and straining in the semi-darkness, you manage to make to make out a shape up in the tree across from you
"Well would you look at that~ He's awake after all~!"
<The fuck do you want?
>Your angry and startled outburst elicits a chuckle and a wince? from the beast in the tree. With the moonlight muted by clouds, you mentally curse as your only source of light is clipped onto the helmet you left in your hide
"Me? To fuck you of course~ Such a feisty man to land a hit on me, even if by purrrre luck"
>Your brain registers the thrumming sound from its voice and the approximate location it came from. You tighten your grip on the long brush knife as you thumb the safety off
<Well it sounds like you enjoyed it so why don't you be a good kitty and come down here so I can give you another?
"Fufu sooo eager to please! Oh I don't mind if I do~"
>There is a sound like a puff of air and suddenly the voice is coming from somewhere off to the left. Somewhere much closer than before…
>You pivot on the spot with your pistol arcing right where the voice came from
>How the fuck did it get over there so quickly?
>Again, you pick up the sound of air moving, this time it was right behind you!
>In a single movement, you snap off two quick shots toward the the sound and dash in the direction of your hide to retrieve your helmet. It was time to finish this
"Aah so fast and sudden! I hope you shoot your loads like you do that loud thing~"
<What the hell are you?
>Your voice slips into an angry snarl as you realize shooting at it in the dark is a waste of bullets. You need that torch
>The path to your hide is blocked by the cat-demon-thing. Your mind races to come up with a plan to deal with an enemy in the dark that can be seemingly anywhere at once
"Me? I'm just a kitty~! A maaagical kitty who wants to show you a good time! Won't you let me mister?"
Meme-cats are fine in their own way, I just didn't think it would set the scene here to be shitposting
Heh you're not far off the truth, also I'm stealing Private Anon till I finish whatever this is
I've had a lot of time here to think up some fun things to write. I just decided it was time to just try my hand
I'm happy that people enjoy reading this as much as I do writing it
>that last line
Well what do you know. My description of Cheshires as slightly-to-very mad courtesans came back.
Alright it's a county then.
I think I understand the sort of creature you're referring to then. Crooked tooth cockneys.
Cheshires are too good for this world. The heroines we need but don't deserve. The portal opening to our world is a good scenario, but I still like the idea of going to theirs better.
>tfw the person we're replying to is a white cuckold
Show him, leather man
I don't think you quite understand what you're in for. To start with…
<Goodness me, no! Nothing so uncivilized! Why, I could just send them through the woods, send them through the woods, and send them through the woods over and over with, ah, some choice signposts until they get it. They're like children, you seeee, and any schoolmaster worth her chalk knows that repetition is the mother of learning.~
<"HYAAAAHAHAHAHArrrrrr, what a pack of jackanapes mine eyes see before me! Bahah, what's wrong, your faces were so confident a moment ago! Did you lose your manhood when you saw me cleave that boulder in twain? Weren't you going to "own dat dragon pussy"? By Jove, your complexions are as grey as the clouds above. They'll be paler yet ere I am done with you."
You are greeted with the sight of a little blonde girl in a neat blue dress (and pith hat) no older than twelve years playing hopscotch alongside a wide-eyed and trembling black man. Rapidly-melting frost coats his upper body, while scorch marks cover his pants and sharp burs stick to his feet.
>Magical huh? Well that would explain how it moves so fast. It was almost as if it was able to disappear in one place and reappear in another
>Judging by how well it snuck up on you in the daylight, odds are if it can turn invisible, the damn thing can probably teleport as well
>Perhaps if you could bait it to move…
<Heh well for all your 'magic' I guess you can't stop bullets huh?
"Bullets? Is that what you call your weapons?"
>Its mocking tone seemed to shift towards curiosity with a hint of something else…
>Before you can reply, a light breeze picks up, bringing you the smell of dirt, a feminine musk and blood. Lots of it
>Rankled at the strength of the smell, you take a take a step back with knife and pistol held ready to defend or attack
>Maybe you got her better than you thought you did
<Well judging by how much you're bleeding, I'm surprised you are able to pull off all that 'magic' of yours and still be standing
"Hah! You think this little ah scratch is enough to stop me? You're going to ah h-have to work me a lot harder~ to wear me out~"
>Her voice is closer than ever and seems to be coming from everywhere and yet no-where
"Just relaaax mister and l-let's have some some f-fun. I promise you enjoy it!"
>Panic is clawing at the back of your mind but something else bothers you more. She sounds… unsteady now
>Wait, she? When did you start thinking of this thing as a 'she'?
>You hear the 'puff ' sound somewhere off to your right making you jump and nervously aim in the direction of the sound
>No mocking voice, no new sounds, nothing. You hold your breath, straining to hear any new sounds of approach
>A minute passes in heavy silence. And other. Nothing
>This is your chance!
>You dash towards the dark outline of your hide, quickly slap on your helmet and flick on the light, sweeping the area in the harsh LED light
>Nothing seems to catch your eye but you can see were you had been judging by the flattened grass and torn earth
>Reaching behind you into your hide, you swing out your rifle and chamber a round. Best to be ready if they tried anything else funny
>Cautious steps through the greenery with rifle up, something catches your eye. Something black and purple… and red
>After all the mysterious and weird shit, you finally getting a good look at her hunched up against a tree, shoulder bound in soaking red bandages
>She's looks so small
>Looks like you were right about her being some kind of cat. A pair of feline ears sat atop her head, one pink, the other purple and rather tattered looking
>Her arms from the elbows down were covered in dirty, striped fur of the same colours, ending with what looked like a combination of hands and paws.
>She was dressed in some kind of leotard-cross corset with a skirt, all of which being striped or checkered diamonds and covered in blood and mud
>Movement from her long striped tail catches your eye and you sweep your rifle up as you take a step back
>Your eyes lock with her brilliant gold ones, making you pause just to stare into them
"Heh well look at y-you mister, you got me pretty good there. Looks like curiosity killed this cat."
>Her tired but still somehow smug voice breaks your revere, forcing you to notice how ragged, thin and bloody she is
>And you thought you had it bad, she looks like she hasn't had a good meal or rest since getting here. Your heart twists a little at the thought
"Like what you see mister? Though I must admit I've seen better days"
>Her tired grin twists into a grimace as her battered body jerks in pain. She tries to sit up a little higher but fails due to the pain and significant blood loss
>You didn't sign up for this shit. You didn't want to get raped half to death and whatever hell came after
>But you didn't like the idea of watching a sentient being, human or monster, die in such a miserable way either
>Lowering the rifle and taking a knee in front of her, you take off your helmet so that she can better see your face
<OK you have two choices: Answer my questions and I'll patch you up, stop you dying a slow and painful death or I put you out of your misery right here. Your choice
Oh my god please repost it I loved it but I lost it I miss it so much it was so cute
please continue, very good for your first writefaggotry
I like it. Please continue.
I'm glad people are reading and enjoying it
I'll post more and more often the day after tomorrow but I've been/am busy with uni exams
>Her mismatched ears perked up and her brilliant golden eyes outright shone with hope. It was like she wasn't even trying to hide it
>Surely she was not that desperate that she'd so easily accept help from someone who had been trying to kill her just minutes ago
"Ooh~? Is that allll you want from me m-mister? Not a little something else on the s-si- "
>Her face paled and her whole body began to shiver. Probably a mixture of severe bloodloss and not a little shock
>She didn't have long. Minutes at the most if the wound went untreated any longer. Enough of this shit
<I'll take that as a yes. You've got maybe 5 minutes tops before that wound kills you. Here and now, promise that you'll tell me what I want to know and I'll save your life
"D-d-deal m-mister, you can trus- "
>Her body seizes and her head sags against her bloody chest. You dash forward to check her pulse
>Looks like she just passed out. Probably a good thing considering that there is probably a bullet lodged in her shoulder that you are going to have to dig out
<Well, looks like it's time to get to work. Let's get you somewhere I can work on you
>You slip your helmet back on and sling your rifle over one shoulder. After a moment or two, you decide a bridal carry is the most effective means of moving her
>The sweet irony of the motion is not lost on you. She's oddly lighter than you thought her to be and you soon understand why
>You can feel most of her bones rub against you while slipping an arm around her shoulders and the other behind her knees
>This was much worse that anticipated. So thin with that much bloodloss was pretty much a death sentence. It'd be a miracle if she pulled through this
>Dragging out your ground-mat and the medkit from your pack, you realised that you had no real experience with dealing with bullet wounds
>The enemy didn't use guns after all, the most you'd done is read the field manual on first-aid so you could look after yourself
>Deciding against trying anything beyond simple on her, you sift though your pack till you find your set of trusty pliers
>They had been a gift from your dad and they'd come in handy so many times that you almost always had them on you
>After washing the nose of the pliers with rubbing alcohol, you gently peel off the sodden bandages around the bullet wound, taking care not to agitate it
>From what you can see, the bullet didn't go very far in. Probably because you hit her at point black range and before the bullet had enough energy to tear through her shoulder
>From what you can see, the bullet didn't go very far in. Probably because you hit her at point black range and before the bullet had enough energy to tear through her shoulder
other than that it's a good story.
Why? Do I sense a /k/ tier autist in this thread? :^)
It think what anon here is trying to say that our writefag friend has a very poor, at best, understanding of ballistics and elementary physics and should consider seeking some instruction on the subject
it's not even /k/ autism, this is just fundamental kinetic energy and momentum stuff that most highschool students learn by senior year. c'mon senpai, step it up
>Carefully probing the hole with the nose of the pliers, you feel something hard, maybe the bullet. Perhaps not
>It looks like the shot took out part of her collar bone before eating into the muscle of her shoulder. The bone doesn't feel broken thought
>Pushing further in, you feel something else hard in the little tunnel of torn flesh. Adjusting your grip, you gingerly open the pliers to grasp the end of the bullet
>After slipping with blood, a few tries later and you have the deformed bullet in your hand. Good thing you decided against hollow points
>Removing the bullet didn't seem to have done any further damage or worsened the current bleeding, you try to figure out how to seal the wound shut to heal
>The med kit didn't appear to have any needles or thread. It did however, have what looked like a stapler
<Oh boy this isn't going to half hurt when she wakes up… If she wakes up…
>It failed on the first shot but the next two sealed the hole up very nicely and after disinfecting around the fresh staples, you set to work bandaging her shoulder
>With the damage to her shoulder, putting her arm in a sling is probably a good idea. Adjusting the straps to fit her, you pulled her to your chest to slip her into it
>Well for someone who looks like they've been living in the jungle for a few months, she doesn't smell all that bad
>On the contrary, she smells very much of a feminine musk with a hint of sour sweat. The whole combination leaves you taking a bit longer than necessary to put the sling on
>You can't remember the last time you were so close to a woman- NO this is not the time for that
>Shaking your mind free of such things, you shifted attention towards how you were going to manage an unconscious and injured cat woman
>Checking the food and water rations, you maybe enough to last 3 more days but given how much she would need the food when she woke up, you were going to need more
>The best course of action seemed to be to catch up with main group to report in and requisition more supplies. That plan resulted with the problem of how your comrades would react to her
>Perhaps they didn't need to know about her. At least not yet
I have a reasonable understanding of physics but its not my main field. I also haven't studied ballistics to a high degree but I highly doubt a small calibre bullet at point black range has enough kinetic energy to tear through a grown woman's shoulder. I may be wrong but I'm not sure what the first anon was expecting
I think the big issue is just the "before the bullet had enough energy to tear through" implies that that the bullet was gaining momentum and energy as it flew, which is exactly the opposite of what happens. But for the most part you're right, a pistol caliber usually wouldn't punch right through someone like you see in movies. No harm no foul, you're still doing a great job.
What he says is accurate. I should have been more clear, but a bullet is not a rocket, it can't gain energy after leaving the barrel.
Yeah it far too long for that to click for me
Far longer that I care to admit
>a bullet is not a rocket
Maybe the military has switched to gyrojet type projectiles in this story.
And it's caseless.
And it has no rifling, spin is induced by magnetism.
ok, now we've got some /k/ autists in the threadand that's fine by me
>By the time you had cleaned up the equipment and repacked the medkit, the strain and exhaustion you had accumulated over the last few hours was finally setting in
>Covering a yawn, you were confronted with the issue of sleeping arrangements. She seemed harmless enough given her condition and you only had one sleeping bag
>Given how much blood she'd lost and the chill in the air, sharing the one bag appeared to be the only solution. The idea was somehow both attractive and off-putting
>Your body seemed to decide for the both of you as your yawns became longer and more frequent and your eyelids began to grow leaden
<Hah. Would you look at that, you get to sleep with me after all. I guess you didn't expect it to end up this way though, huh?
>After stowing your rifle and helmet, you once again gently scoop her up into a bridal carry before setting her down in the hide and onto the unzipped sleeping bag
>The only way to fit the both of you seemed to be spooning. Of course it was. You were going to have to be the big spoon just to be able to do up the bag from the inside
>It took quite a bit of skill to arrange the both of you without shaking her too much. Why were you being so careful? It's not like she'd notice and you were only doing what you had to
>Your mental conversation was cut short when her rich musk once again reached your nose. No woman, monster or not, should be able to smell so damn good. It was now somehow hard to fall asleep
>As the minutes dragged on, you could feel her body temperature rise to meet your own as you tried to adjust to the new but not entirely unpleasant conditions inside the bag
>Her breaths came in a steady rhythm and your own slowed to match hers as sleep finally claimed you
>You awoke the next morning to an unexpected weight on your chest and something vaguely serpentine coiled around your left leg. Dragging your eyes open yielded the sight of her draped over your chest, fast asleep
>Her tail had been the thing you felt on your leg. For what you expected to be a terrible night sleep, you felt oddly refreshed and ready to deal with almost anything that came your way
>A nagging thought told you that you shouldn't be feeling so comfortable with someone who had been actively trying to attack and rape you just the night before. It was rather unsettling how contented you felt
>Before you could make a move to get up, her whole body began to rumble, almost like she was… purring. Surely not. Well she is part cat so it shouldn't be much of a stretch for her to purr too
>You chuckle at the thought and set about carefully moving out from under her without waking her up. Such efforts were in vain as every attempt only caused her to latch onto you more
>Abandoning all attempts at subtlety, you opted for firmly but gently disentangling yourself from her grip and unzipped the bag to greet the dawn sunlight and the cool damp air
>Walking outside of the hide, you stretched out cramped limbs and getting your blood pumping. Hearing the shuffling that heralded her own awakening, you turned around to face your hide.
>Only to become affixed with her stunning golden eyes. Eyes that seemed to soak up and shine with the dawn light as a smug grin stretched across her face
"Sleep well mister? I know I sure did~"
next update soon?
<…Huh? I suppose I did. I'm rather surprised myself to be honest. Now that I've upheld my side of the deal, you are going to answer my questions
>Your mind is still somewhat ensnared by her by brilliant golden eyes but a shake of your head seems to be enough to clear your thoughts, for now anyway
>She moves to sit up but seemed to forget that one of her arms could no longer support weight, causing her to flop onto one side
>Taking a moment to come to terms with the the sling, she opened her mouth to say something, only to be interrupted by a shockingly loud gurgle
"Well mister, you wouldn't have any food for this poor, hungry kitty would you?~"
>Her eyes were hard to avoid. So big and pleading, it was like staring at the sun. Gaze for too long and you were bound to have problems as a result
<I don't have much left in the way of food. The most I can spare for you is some powdered eggs. You can have them
"Soo~ I have to eat alll the eggs?~"
<… Yes. You have to eat all the eggs
>The smug look on her face somehow grew even wider at your statement. You couldn't seem to figure out why the grin on her face got under your skin as much as it did
>With a sigh and a shake of your head, you set to work assembling your gas-jet cooker to heat up some breakfast for the both of you. It occurs to you that you still have no idea what she is
>Or even what her name is for that matter. Casting a glance towards her, you are surprised to find her still staring at you as you worked. The intensity of her gaze was somewhat unsettling
<You do realize that staring as much as you are is not going to make the food arrive any faster? I know, let's start with the first question, seeing as you look fit to answer them. What are you?
"Me? I do believe I told you already. I'm a magical kitty!~"
<… Right. A magical kitty huh? That means literally nothing to me. I do believe we agreed on things that I wanted to know in exchange for not letting your die an agonizing death
>She visibly wilts under your baleful glare and the smirk is almost wiped clean off her face. Perhaps that was a little harsh. You turned back to working on the cooker and began boiling some water
"Cheshire. I'm what we call a Cheshire Cat. In essence, we really are magical cats and we come from the realm of Wonderland"
Just read through this stuff. I'm enjoying it.
<Cheshire Cat from Wonderland huh? That's oddly similar to some fairy tales I read as a kid. The guy who wrote about it described Wonderland as a place full of madness
<He also wrote stories about some of the other things living there like the Jubjub bird and the Jabberwock. His descriptions were of animal like things, not human-esque beings like you
"Really? That's interesting. We've only had these particular forms for a few generations. Perhaps that man was somehow able to cross between your world and ours and made it back to write the stories
<These particular forms? Are you saying that you didn't used to look human? How the hell does that work? I'm going to assume that 'we' applies to all the different monsters out there as well, not just you
"Yes we were all different back then. More like beasts driven purely by instinct rather than we are now. The humans of our world fought with us for an untold length of time as we fought with them"
"As the war between us drew on, we believe the humans developed what was called a Grand Magic. A spell powerful enough to affect our the whole world, including the realms of Heaven, Hell and Wonderland"
"In what was originally an attempt to wipe out all non-human life, the resulting spell apparently backfired and ended up causing just about all traces of human mana to detonate. The result was a total calamity"
"The entire human race was brought to the brink of extinction in a single day. The effects however, were not just felt by humans. Many of us were killed outright by the calamity and the rest, well…"
<The rest became what you are now
>Everything she told you about magic and this 'calamity' left you reeling and desperately trying to make sense of it all. This was going to take some getting used to. You decided to focus of not burning the food
>Her stomach gurgled again, causing you to glance in her direction. She seemed interested in the sling you put on her arm and was testing the range of motion she had left when you passed her a bowl full of eggs
<Here is your eggs. Try not to spill them cuz there is basically nothing else I can give you. That includes my food. Now for my second question: Why did you come to our world? Was it because of what happened?
>Balancing the bowl on her lap, she immediately set to work shoveling the eggs into her mouth at a voracious pace, practically inhaling her food. It made you wonder just how she and the rest of them had being surviving
>Setting down her empty bowl with a contented sigh, she begins stretching out in, well, a very cat-like manner before sitting down across from you as you finish your own food in a much more sedate manner
"Well those have got to be the best eggs I've ever had. As to why we are here, I'm sure you know that all mamono are female by now. Well, considering that fact and that the only compatible mates were almost extinct…"
<Yeah ok I get the picture. Judging by how malnourished you are, how have your kind been able to survive for the last 6 months while in an entirely alien environment? Surely any supplies you brought would have run out already
"We really had no idea what to expect in terms of what we were getting into. Mass exodus of the population of 4 realms was never going to be anything but a gamble. We packed as much food and supplies as we could"
"Once through the rift, we knew that there could be no way back, we had to leave or face the end of everything. We ran out of food nearly 40 days ago and our group has been living off whatever we can hunt and any fruit we can find"
"We lost Myria and Tristi to some purple fruit that turned out to be poisonous and Ellis died after being bitten by some kind of s-snake. Now there are only 7 of us left including me. The worst part is, if they were still alive, we would have all starved"
Moar pls, this is great
more /k/ autism please