12:12 now we're onto something.
>Things like blame, shame
From who?
>Feeling powerless and like they do not get to have boundaries.
I agree with this if that is the case.
Adult rape victims feel powerless as well.
>Secrecy
From who and why?
This is a big one and the one-sided look of total innocence for the child blinds them to the reason why the pattern of "child sexual abuse victims" in turn seek out children when they grow up.
This can stem from both points above, keeping it a secret to avoid blame and shame tying into the whole definition of innocence given.
The other alternative is keeping it a secret because of feeling powerless to offend the adult. Again, just as bad as any other intimidating coercion (blackmail, hiding domestic abuse lying about falling downstairs or walking into a door, etc).
Now these two points go along following the idea that the child hated the experience.
Let's also look at the opposing side following the idea that the child enjoyed the experience
What I find is quite often overlooked is the other quite popular purpose use of secrecy among kids. When a kid realises the hidden variable between doing something "wrong" and getting in trouble for it is getting caught. As a result they turn to secrets and lies to gain whatever benefit from doing the something wrong while avoiding the negative consequences for getting caught doing it. This applies to secretly sneaking out after curfews, lying about their age to get into bars,
Breaking something valuable by playing with a ball in the house and trying to keep it a secret by trying to glue it back together with duct tape, and later lying about it when it is realised. And this idea isn't even mostly learned from adults, quite often they learn this from their older peers. And as they grow older they become better at it. This also applies to sexual stuff with an adult as well. If they enjoy it and are told there will be trouble for the adult if anyone else finds out (threats are even less required at this point), then they keep that a secret too, as poorly kept as that may be at that age, but as they grow older, look at how much fascination paedophiles have with security and encryption and the deniability layer granted through anonymity. And learning of the thin layer of anonymity granted through the internet, they grow a fascination with computers and is why you have this growing stereotype of them being involved in the tech industry along with the more popularised professions of the education industry and priesthood. They aren't stupid, teaching and priesthood was their approach to getting close to children in the past and now it's moved to the slightly less risky cyberspace and child pornography, lolicon and ecchi.
As much as arguments try to defend lolicon and child dolls and push for acceptability, the other side is not stupid either. Granting acceptability of these things means greater visibility, greater visibility means the chance of these kids finding it increases and gaining an interest in it also. The more acceptable those kids grow up around it and become, the less blame and shame they feel for their past actions and with less blame and shame means there's less problems with innocence being obscured (as described) and increased probability of not viewing anything wrong with adult-child sex altogether, and n generations down the line we have an increased amount of adults who view paedophilia the same way we view homosexuality now.
So they will avoid being hypocritical against freedom of speech in some cases but would prefer that it be allowed in a discrete way such as to avoid the above order of events from potentially taking place.
Okay, back to the video
19:20 Agreed. Shaming is indeed a problem, and unfortunately, is (or at least was) used as a way to coerce abstinence because of the ultimate goal of preventing young pregnancies and preventing overpopulation.
19:40 Agreed, though wanting a nice and easy child isn't an inherently bad thing to want, Trying to force strict control on the child and have them obey whether it be for something "good" this time (like, not sex) is almost as bad as strict control for accepting something bad. It reduces their sense of agency, and makes it harder for them to stand up for themselves later on.
They should be aiming for a nice and easy child by having them agree on the "good" rather than feel compelled to obey.
21:06 On point.
21:27 And those are the precise children pedophiles who also feel isolated themselves find attraction towards. In a bittersweet way it almost sounds like a great idea for a meant for each other massive feels romance film. Granted the positive portrayal of paedophilia would mean it would hardly see the light of day.