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/qq/ - Personal Issues

(We'll help you) deal with it


Winner of the 77nd Attention-Hungry Games
/x/ - Paranormal Phenomena and The RCP Authority

April 2019 - 8chan Transparency Report
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File: dc99426a3545696⋯.jpg (76.5 KB, 567x790, 567:790, dc99426a354569640a902152db….jpg)


>forgot to buy coffee at the super market and i'm already at a long line in the middle of checkout

>when i get back home i see that my chocolate candybar was next to the hot potatoes and melted

so how was your day



this is an advice board not /r9k/ where low-effort 50 word OPs are considered standard, you retard.



Whoa those are some really severe personal issues brother, great thread.

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My older brother is married to a hag that cost him his job and his mental health. Their constant problems have been a nonstop drain on the finance of my parents and myself.

My younger brother is getting a masters in art, but he's having trouble getting recognized because he's starting to encounter the SJW element present in the art world. Because his work isn't blatant anti-Trump bullshit or feminist vagina art, he's getting passed over by a lot of big galleries.

I'm working fulltime and getting decent pay, and living at home is saving me a ton of money, but only I can't afford to live on my own in this shitty state. Even shitty apartments will run 1k a month plus utilities, effectively leaving me in a position where it would be impossible to save up enough money to eventually move somewhere nicer.. and if I move somewhere else, that means giving up the only good job I've ever had or losing more of my life to commuting.. Which I can't fucking do because I've developed some fucking fatigue condition that leaves me so fucking tired after a day of work that I start dozing at the wheel with only a 30 minute commute.

I want to quit everything and go live out in the middle of nowhere with my meager life savings and be a NEET, but if I leave home, I'm essentially fucking over every single person in my family, because I'm their fucking safety net.


> My older brother is married to a hag that cost him his job and his mental health. Their constant problems have been a nonstop drain on the finance of my parents and myself.

Let's be honest here, there's only two ways this is going to end for you; either you and everyone else cuts them off and they get it together or you spend the rest of your life paying for their shit.

I got no idea about the other two though.



The way things are going, she's either going to end up in jail, killing herself, or trying to kill my brother. There's a lot of marital drama in our family, and I think my older brother is trying not to become another divorce story… Or he doesn't trust her not to try and bankrupt him.



The art world is incredibly corrupted, but there are still many people out there who are willing to pay for genuine beauty. The key to becoming a successful artist is having good connections, so the good news is that it'll get easier the older he gets, but he has a long road ahead of him. Tell him to get good at networking, because that's half the battle. Maybe he could try selling his stuff online, bypassing the gatekeepers.

Your older brother is screwed. Sorry, but that's how it is. Whether he stays with her or he divorces her, his life will be ruined. This is why you should never marry. I hope you don't end up making his same mistake, OP.

There's not much you can do at the moment, especially if you want to be a good guy and support your family. Keep saving as much money as you can, maybe try asking for a raise. Wait for things to get better (or worse). They always do.

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how do i focus on studying? i'm heading towards a failure in most of my exams, and i can't fix this shit

i've already deleted all my vidya and porn, but i still end up distracting myself with other shit since the reading material is horribly boring



(((school))) teaches you nothing. Dont waste your time with those braindead goyim. learn to think for yourself.



yea, but i need a diploma in order to work anything other than janitor work



Hi, 5/10 years younger me!

Give up all your social network accounts and distracting vices, and realize everything worthy in life is painful as fuck and concentration needs ALL your best efforts for prolonged and repeated times. If you don't, you'll face lots of problems in the future.


Keep the task which you have in mind and return to your work when your mind starts to wander. Find a place in which you won't be distracted and only allow yourself a break when you make serious progress.



Isn't there a study group you can join? I think you'd find it extremely helpful. Just cutting distractions probably won't be enough, you have to find a way to make the material interesting for you (since your discipline seems to be so weak). Search the 'feynman technique' on Youtube.

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Does anyone here have any helpful advice on getting rid of a fetish? And I mean an actual fetish in the sense that it's something I absolutely need and I can't get off to anything else. Everything I've read online in regards to the issue is just a variation of "juts b urslef :^)" and I'm getting pretty tired of this shit.

This fetish of mine, at least in part, has ruined my life and is continuing to do so. It's degrading, depressing, humiliating, extremely unhealthy, and the simplest, most innocuous little things can set it off, which is even further tormenting because I'm trying to stop masturbating like a sex-crazed teenager, and it's pretty hard (haha fuck you) to do that when I can find arousal just about anywhere. In addition, it has pretty much guaranteed that I'll never have a healthy relationship due to the nature of it. I've had the fetish for as long as I can remember, since before I was even old enough to know what my dick was for besides pissing, and it's played a large role in shaping who I am today, which believe me, is really not a good thing. I'm not going to tell you exactly what it is because it's not particularly important for the topic at hand, but I will tell you it's not cuckoldry, since I know that's probably the first thing you thought of. It's not much better though.

tl;dr, All you need to know is that I hate this shit and I want it gone from my life for good.

So can anyone help me? Any similar personal experiences you can share, any books you can recommend? Sheer willpower alone isn't cutting it for me, if it were just refraining from jerking off to the stuff then I'm sure I could manage, but I want to go to the root of the problem and erase the desire itself completely. I want to be attracted to normal things.

3 posts omitted. Click reply to view.



I suppose I should also mention the other side in your case. There is more to sexuality than the mechanical act. Events are in motion before it ever comes to that. Some think of it as energy or magic or something. I don't care as long as it works.



File: 45c93cfa9fc68e8⋯.png (376.74 KB, 1860x2072, 465:518, bc77e8132a1edbb0a681d236b4….png)

>>>/nofap/ is the answer



I totally know what you're talking about. When I was 14, I found that I was aroused by a number of things… blood, vore, furries, gay stuff… Generally every part of the human body, including the insides, would turn me on in some way.

In fact, what I really hated was hearing that it was all normal. You know, because those fucking normies want attention and take it away from the people who actually need it?

No, like, seriously. Have you ever taken video of yourself doing unspeakable things and then fapped to it? It's fun in the moment, but holy SHIT does it come back hard on you the next morning!

Primarily, I enjoy my fetishes, but if you want to get rid of them, you'll need to publicize your fetish to the point to where it's not really fun anymore. You don't have to admit that you have said fetish, but just pretend that everyone else has the fetish or post some scat (if there is any) somewhere, and then you should get tired of it within a few months.

I should warn you, it's not easy. You can't just take a pill and then watch your fetish turn into rainbows and candy.



I read your pic, and soon thereafter I saw that they now have softcore porn online in point-of-view FROM THE WOMANS PERSPECTIVE.

If that's not a proof that anon was right, I don't know


Some interesting techniques in The Power of Now. Pick your virus:



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Here is a new one folk. I am getting suicidal thoughts for getting unwarranted pity.

I am nothing special, just a regular fall guy when shit breaks apart. Hard works, pushing myself to limit, withstanding tides of bullshit and blame are nothing new to me. I can still stand strong after that, but what baffles me is that I want to eat a bullet every single fucking time anyone shows pity to me.

Why. Fucking why. Why pity for me who blazes through all this bullshit, this is spitting on my finest hour, my efforts, my willpower. I do not even want praise, I just want to be left alone and hope that other can own up their shit soon because even I would like some extra free time. I start thinking of fading away to see how shit unfolds when things break apart and the guy who solve everything is pushing daisies, not because he cannot take that shit any more, because of pity.

I do not want consoling, remunerations, fucking hell. Not even sex for solace, especially if it comes from pity. I am teetering on the edge right now, if I see one more pity from my peers, hopefully I will not end up a chalk mark and make the news tomorrow.


YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.


We already have an An Hero thread that you are more than welcome to join in on.

So how's you manage pityfuk? Not that I'd like that sort of thing but I feel ugly as fuck now.

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I know this type of thread is probably posted here all the time, so sorry in advance if this annoys anyone but What happened to me? What happened to my motivation? I have none. The fact that I am even writing this out is frankly amazing me. I have no drive or initiative, I can barely even force my self to do necessary bodily functions like eat or go to the bathroom, I just lie in my bed almost all the time. I don't even do anything! I don't jerk off or go online or play games, I. Just. Sit. There. I don't know why and I don't know what to do or how to fix it. If any of you went through this in the past, have any tips on how to fix this, or anything else that could possibly help me in any way please share… I'm so tired of being like this I just want to be able to do things again but physically can't bring myself to do them

13 posts omitted. Click reply to view.



Due to a mix of financial and religious reasons which I really have no urge to get into I cannot take med


This sounds like a great way to burn energy but I don't see it helping me very much or myself sticking with it


I've had this for a while now, Its gotten to the point where I will spend more time in it in my life than out of it I really can't give you a time period because I honestly don't know, but its been awhile



Life can be a chore. Want a recommendation?

Do something that raises your senses.

You live in a city with abandoned buildings? Climb over the fence and explore at 3 AM.

Live near nature or large natural parks? Go for a hike in the middle of the night. Don't take anything with you, not even your phone, and keep going until you feel "something".

Take acid or mushrooms. Hell do the things listed while on them.

Feel the world, rather than just looking at it.

I felt like you for a long time, but I experienced that danger (more than the things listed) would snap me out of it.

Modern life is like a vapid film of which you know both the plot and the ending. And it's all build around not doing anything legitimately dangerous. It's not surprising some people feel completely lethargic in the face of it.

What's the most dangerous or outrageous thing you've seen someone do these days? What's the most extreme thing someone can do in the mundaneness of modern existence? Earn a lot of money?

Separate yourself from the established dogma. Move outside the edge. You'll figure out eventually what I mean. And avoid pills if you don't want to become a complete zombie.

There's a whole world out there that modernity has made invisible.



You give good advice so thank you, but I've done the things you've said all ready and them some, I've been in a lot of weird or dangerous situations, but the effect never seems to stay afterwards, its only in the moment which is fine, but I need to make it go longer







I've been going through this for ~2+ years, since a lot of crazy shit happened in and out of my life. For some reason, I don't feel suicidal despite life feels pointless; like, I want to see how the ride completely ends, or if shit gets worse (or better…I can have a little hope, but I doubt it'll get better).

Two cats I rescued give me a little motivation to wake up, since I gotta take care of them. I've been seeing a psychiatrist, but I've hit a wall with my recovery. Try to do something active like exercising (I'm using DDP Yoga, since I got hurt in the past).


When my depression was almost making me unstable, my boss gave me the number for the Employee Assistance Program (look into this if your company has it). When I spoke to a counselor, they paired me up with a doctor who understood I don't want to be on pills to live some kind of decent life.

My advice on finding a good doctor: find someone with a forte on depression/depressed/traumatized clients, and actually has experience in the field. You don't want some fat, tattooed sjw bitch/numale cuck who never experienced any sorrow or sadness like the liberal schmuck s/he is. Also, drop a doctor who not only talks to you like you're his /her kid, but also automatically makes assumptions/"diagnoses" in the first five seconds in your session (I dropped one doctor when he tough I was autistic, and then suggested "autistic dating sites." The guy was a fucking ass-hole).

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Mine and bf's one year anniversary is in three weeks or so, and I don't think I deserve to stay with him.

He's older, smarter, way more talented and can actually get shit done. Meanwhile, I have severe social anxiety, can't hold a job, will probably fail high school and have mental breakdowns every day.

He's willing to work hard, so that I wouldn't have to and could stay at home, but I don't think I'm good enough for him.

I just want to be better for him, but I don't really have any skills of any kind. What can I do to be better?

60 posts and 8 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.



>He's older, smarter, way more talented and can actually get shit done.

What's wrong with this? Isn't this the reason why you're with him anyway?

>Meanwhile, I have severe social anxiety, can't hold a job, will probably fail high school and have mental breakdowns every day.

You realize it's also his decision that he's choosing to stay with you? And if these things make you feel less than you want to, try thinking of ways you can improve them.


File: 4db116dc93e12e6⋯.jpg (26.14 KB, 505x256, 505:256, evil.jpg)


if he is happily with you then the best thing you can do is be with him


lu, is that you?

you know i love you


you god damn pathetic tranny faggot



You need to stop comparing yourself to your boyfriend.

I know the feeling of having social anxiety and mental breakdowns. It's like a bunch of voices in your head or something that keep irritating you about how much you suck at life and keep making up excuses. Not comparing yourself to people isn't as easy as it sounds, and I would know, because even I haven't gotten over it yet.

>I don't really have any skills of any kind

>can't hold a job

Honestly, I think you're judging yourself way too soon. First of all, it's a myth that people find their job right out of college. I'm not going to lie to you, 2 years after college, you'll be asking to suck dick for money.

And second of all, why the hell do you think you don't have any skills? The only people who find their skills in high school are fucking creepy, and they don't make good examples for you to compare yourself to.

Please get as far away from your boyfriend as possible and don't come back to him until you've got everything under control.

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At this point it strikes me as a better investment to learn Japanese so I can compensate for my loneliness with their depraved porn games and hentai for the rest of my life than to attempt to ever get a girlfriend.

7 posts omitted. Click reply to view.



The only upside I see to learning BR is being in the loop if they start shit talking in games and being able to tell them to stop being cancerous fucks in their own native babble.



>tell them to stop being cancerous fucks in their own native babble

lol, so true.



>Hentai for the rest of your life? That's the stupidest decision I've ever seen anyone make

>Hell, who needs a girlfriend when there's hentai? lol

Did you have a schizoid episode in the middle of writing this post?


This will ensure you never get a girlfriend. >>>/nofap/



Right, I'm sorry. The stupidest decision I've ever seen anyone make is actually your mother giving birth to you.

(I'm not mad at you, I just like making up comebacks like everyone else on 8chan.)

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Help! I've fallen and I can't get up!

File: a53ae3967fc2f47⋯.jpg (17.9 KB, 260x183, 260:183, IMG_1289.JPG)


I remember when, before the April hax, this board was alive and well. It was so nice to have a relatively constructive place to bring up things most would rather not hear, IRL or otherwise. Now there's 3 posts a day at best. Why was it abandoned so easily? What is needed to bring this place back?


I guess actually remembering this board exist should be enough.

File: ece224ae3a5630d⋯.png (45.26 KB, 554x261, 554:261, cap.png)


How do I explain something like this to my sweetheart? I don't think she's wrong or lying, nor can I see why people dislike her, but she's really having trouble with this stuff.


>why is it when people act like assholes, it's somehow cute and endearing, and everyone loves them to death?

I don't think that's true. I think people are mostly averse to rude demeanor, and have a generally low tolerance for people who want to behave that way. However, there are people in your life that you have to get along with for various reasons, and therefore you have develop methods of coping with their idiosyncrasies. Some people will change their perception of someone so that they can observe everything they say in an absurd or humorous way. This is sort of like a type of rationalization, and maybe it's similar to the idea that people tend to make fun of things they don't understand or are afraid of in order to cope with those things.

What I'm saying is, maybe you've got it all wrong, and the people that you think are warmhearted towards a person who you also consider to be an asshole are actually choosing to approach and react to them with some sense of irony? I don't know.

Without more contextually specific information, it's sort of hard to make a judgement about the situations your sweetheart experiences. A person's reaction to another is influenced by a multitude of different factors, like their relationship status, their sense of humor, various aspects of their identity, their current emotional state, and so on.


File: 7a5759994cfdcc0⋯.jpg (308.26 KB, 1600x1152, 25:18, emotion_scale.jpg)


Jesus, raise your vibration. Gossip is the most braindead unfulfilling shit. It's barely above being an apathetic couch potato which I imagine comprises most of your life.

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As of late, I find it increasingly difficult to form relationships with other people, be it women, or friends, due to a striking difference in "culture," if you will. By culture, I mean all of the experiences, interests, memories, and even dumb jokes that were had for the majority of my life on the internet, or as a reclusive fellow with esoteric interests. Assuming that others are/were in a similar position I am, how does one deal with it?

Women generally come from very different backgrounds, so bonding with them feels inorganic. My past relationships never dove into the autism of fandom, or searched for new and interesting music. I become miserable when I attempt to suck it up and integrate normally. Past girlfriends try very little to show interest in the giant amount of vidya, VN's books, music that I enjoy - despite my attempt to show interest in what they enjoy. I don't know if it's the difference in our backgrounds that could be used for bonding, or what to do.

The same somewhat extends towards friends and acquaintances. I try and hold onto relationships, but eventually the lack we have in common takes its toll. There is different jargon, movies, videogames, sports, (the generic junk) etc. I try to join friend groups, but eventually I get excluded from a conversation in one way or another e.g. regurgitation of “dank memes” or talk about some garbage form of entertainment that was on Netflix. It just makes me miss the past where I’d blissfully play games and talk about them with online friends, who sadly all moved on for unrelated reasons.

I don’t want to just complain that I don’t fit in with normies; rather, I want to hear what others do or have done. It isn’t that people don’t like me, or I absolutely don’t fit in with others; it’s that I never really feel close to any of these people. As of now I haven’t any online friends at all to relate to either.

Sorry for the big ass blogpost.

>tl;dr how do anons experience relationships?


I don't. I stopped pretending to be somebody else because I figured it was detrimental to waste time with people I had to lie to or try to like when I want to experience real emotion sometime. Now I'm alone but it's not a lie and I can build on that.



>how do anons experience relationships?

Don't ask me, I've never had a girlfriend or female friend, and I currently don't have any friends at all. Haven't done for about 6 years, and it's been about 9 years since I had more than one. The vast majority of that time has been spent in my bedroom alone, not talking to anyone in real life or online besides the rare bare-bones interaction with family. In my late teens I was diagnosed with asperger's, and I can't perform things like basic small talk, so I'm pretty much fucked socially, no matter what I do.

I just wish I was the type of autist who could go sour grapes mode over having friends/relationships, but instead I've sat here the whole time wishing I wasn't alone, and feeling despair over the thought that I might never have a connection with anybody again.

File: b6033ec9db32a27⋯.png (1.68 MB, 1400x1400, 1:1, Theophany - Time's End II-….png)


I often find myself at a loss of words to describe a feeling of profound loneliness accompanied with a bittersweet realization of the meaninglessness of existence. Is there a word for this?


A combination of angst, ennui, and weltschmerz.






File: efe043423f5a9dd⋯.jpg (204.75 KB, 2000x1000, 2:1, Virginia-Woolf.jpg)

I know this is not what you are asking for, but, is the person suffering of loneliness engaged in a relationship with someone else?

I ask because if understand that if you feel lonely and you ARE actually alone, then perhaps there is hope.

But if you are in a relationship but still feel lonely then all hope is lost.

File: f71237e6dc00634⋯.gif (92.21 KB, 300x200, 3:2, wrinkles.gif)


My mind is really fucking with me right now and I can barely explain it. I feel like I'm losing my mind. I feel like there's voices in my head but they're really vague and far off and barely noticeable. They aren't auditory hallucinations, I'm not hearing anything that isn't there, it's just like, mental disturbances, intrusive thoughts which enter without my consent. They don't effect my actions or anything I do or anything. Fuck this is difficult to explain. Like every now and then when I'll be working on my computer, I'll get these faint and far off voices, like the usual voice inside your head when you read something or think something to yourself, but just doing it by itself.

It's fucking with me real hard.

Some background on my mental health:

I'm super stressed out, all the time. And it's been that way since I started high school. I was always depressive and anxious and I know now it's because of all of that. A year after I graduated, I finally gave in to my mother's advice and let her take me to a psychiatrist which went exactly how I expected it to. He diagnosed me with major depressive disorder and general anxiety which I suspected was complete bullshit. I took 3 different SRIs and had enough of it after 6 months and stopped going. My mother has always known about my mental health tendencies and deals with the same depressive personality, so she told me that people "like us" don't really have a feel for what's psychologically normal, and I somewhat believe her, but I don't know why my mom and these doctors keep trying to convince me that I have a mental disorder, maybe if all these depressive people would stop carrying around their depression and anxiety around like it's part of their identity and who they are it might lessen their symptoms and allow them to move towards some sort of catharsis or something, I don't know. But I know my problems are because of the stress of constant change all of my recent life. I've always had to move from place to place and start over, I've never gotten used to one place. Always going job to job and having to readapt constantly, whether it's due to moving or life just hitting me with bullshit and having to deal with it. It's always messed with me somehow.

Post too long. Click here to view the full text.



Now, I am not a psychiatrist, but I know a lot of perfectly healthy people hear voices or have intrusive thoughts. It may be exacerbated by the stress you mentioned.

I myself remember worrying about intrusive thoughts and occasionally experiencing auditory hallucinations. I would sometimes imagine socially unacceptable or violent things and feeling awful about it ("I need to stop thinking of these things"). But of course, the more pressure against it only makes it stronger. I accepted that it was normal a long time ago and now I am able to recognize intrusive thoughts and feel no shame. Auditory hallucinations also disappeared.

Anxiety shows itself in many different ways and it seems that is what you are experiencing due to higher stress levels.

By the way, what is it specifically that is stressing you out?


YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.

Everyone experiences intrusive thoughts. Some people have intrusive thoughts for longer periods of time and with a much higher frequency than others. It's your brain's way of testing the boundaries that have been set upon you (by yourself, society, your peers, etc). You've trained your brain to witness the unpleasant things you've imagined and react to them in a specific manner. The brain will continue to bring you these thoughts because 1) some aspect of your being acknowledges that your reaction to these things is good, and you want to feel good, so you will produce these things in your mind in order to force that proper reaction, and 2) because you continuously acknowledge and react to the images or sounds as they appear.

In short, I would suggest meditation. Learn to hone your attention, and let your brain run wild with all the crazy ideas and thoughts that it manages to create. Acknowledge the sanity, and then let it go.

Just try it. Sit in a comfortable chair, or you can lay down. Close your eyes and try to focus all your attention on your breathing for as long as possible. Eventually, you'll lose your concentration and notice all the chaos inside your mind. This is fine. Acknowledge the insanity, then return your attention back to your breathing, and simply do this every time you lose concentration. Do this for 10 to 15 minutes at a time and once a day. Then, increase your time spent in accordance with how much time you have to dedicate to this mental exercise, but don't neglect it.


File: fe0a0bfb4177841⋯.pdf (944.36 KB, DMSMH.PDF)


Assuming you're healthy and you don't have some mass pressing against your brain, or blood pressure/sugar disorder, or iron deficiency, or pleural effusion, etc, I'll post a theory of mind that seems most accurate. It's the basis of what scientology used to be. They're a cult run by CIA now.

Whenever we lose consciousness, due to stress or whatever, everything in these moments is recorded in the unconscious part of the mind. When remotely similar stimuli are encountered, the unconscious mind begins to take over and we lose consciousness once again. The more stimulation that is received the more that moment is relived. Every sense and thought is brought back. Supposedly a stupid ancient survival mechanism if you believe any of that darwinian bullshit. Whenever these moments are brought back, it attempts to occupy the strongest character possible at the moment, the basis of generational child abuse and other stuff.

The proposed fix was to consciously relive these moments. Hence dianetics being known as a regression therapy or whatever. Stimulating these memories, while conscious, moves them into harmless ordinary memory, as the theory goes. They're relived until they're nothing but ordinary memory that produces no disturbance whatsoever. They call this clearing.

It worked well enough doing this by myself for all the dogshit that just kept hounding me. It felt awful, but nobody yells at me when I'm doing homework anymore.

They say you need a partner, called the auditor, to guide you through it. I have fuck all to talk to. I'm beginning to suspect it's true for stuff that requires a sort of trance to get at. I've never experienced the regression trance they speak of for myself, so I don't know if it's bullshit. It's just that I'm rid of everything obvious that I can remember in my childhood, but there's this fucking feeling I can't shake and it's crippled me. There's more back there from when I was still crawling around, but I haven't found a way to get at it except in the most superficial and blurry images.

Post too long. Click here to view the full text.

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What's the point in doing anything when capitalism is going to destroy the planet and nobody cares enough to stop it?



The world is inevitably going to end at some time. What does it matter if that time is 100 years off instead of 10 billion years off? It is possible that environmental degradation may eventually impact your life, but just the knowledge of the possible demise of humanity in the abstract shouldn't effect how you live your life. The conditions under which humans flourish remain the same, no matter how great the prospect of our mortality.



I don't get how you could not care at all about our shitty future as a species. But maybe I could ignore it better if my own life was worth a damn.


The world as we know it is doomed to be destroyed the moment we define it. All of our 'worlds' are fragile and unstable, constantly changing and rarely having concrete consistent states, just significant events. Capitalism is an unstable, naturally occurring system that slowly overtook another unstable naturally occurring system. It's a change in a pattern that already existed, not something that was conceived of as a way of life and then implemented.



Well, our civilization wants to race mix into oblivion so I welcome the melting ice caps or winter chan.



Liberalism is also damaging the world too.

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