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File: 8421c18b57f56f4⋯.png (531.66 KB, 1280x720, 16:9, really.png)

No.332

Diagnosed autist here. I'm on the low functioning side of high functioning, if that makes sense. My intelligence is normal but everything else is so below average that I can't really function without significant help. In addition to autism I have a slew of other problems (like prosopagnosia, alexithymia, anxiety disorders, phobias, obsessions) that make it hard for me to fit in anywhere where there might be other people. I can take care of myself well enough but when it comes to going out and interacting with other people, I really can't do much of anything.

Of course, whatever piece of my brain that allows me to feel desire for human companionship cruelly stays intact. I'm 26 and I want a qt. I don't mind having no friends, I have a dog.

As normalfags everywhere are so keen to remind me, I'm not "entitled to a relationship". Yeah, fine, I can't force qts to fall in love with me. Obviously I have to carry my cross and accept that I'll never have a qt or even that once my parents die, no human on Earth will have any kind of emotional attachment to me. I just don't know how to.

I remind myself of the evil shit women do to men every minute of every hour of every day. But then, there might be exceptions. I try to take comfort in 2D. It generally makes the longing worse. If I were religious I could at least take one of the numerous paths to holiness that include celibacy and delude myself that I'm doing it by choice, but I'm not religious.

I'm at a wit's end trying to deal with this bullshit. I just want the pain to stop. I don't even need to hold a 3D woman in my arms, or hold her hand, kiss her and have sex. I'd be plenty satisfied with an Internet long distance qt. I have no illusions that I am nothing else but a low value male, being an autist. I don't want a 10/10. I only ask that she be good-hearted and not repulsive. And I'd actually prefer her to be ditzy. You know, the girl next door type. All I want is to be loved in that way, feel needed and useful. I feel like I'm not asking for much, just the bare basics of the human experience. But I don't even get to have that much.

So since I'm stuck in that >tfw no gf loop, and that I objectively have zero hope of getting out of it by actually getting a gf, please share some tips to make the longing more bearable.

No.333

>>332

I'm in almost exactly the same position except I'm 25, I dropped 2D a couple of years ago, and I don't have a dog, so I can't offer any help I'm afraid. I too have longed for a girlfriend or even just a friend for many years, but every day that comes is another day spent alone.

No.353

>>332

you should try some kind of sport, anon

if you have problems with other persons, try something more individual like lifting iron or running

i really like running and recommend it for everyone

theres nothing better than that feeling after a walk when your muscles are all tired and all you want to do is to drink as much water as possible, it clears my mind

keep in mind i'm no doctor, i'm not sure how serious is your condition

as for anxiety, this feeling i know extremely well, i recommend you meditation.

the most basic meditation method is:

sit comfortably > close your eyes > starting focusing on your breath for 10 minutes

for girlfriend i don't have an answer, but i don't think its hard to find an online gf (last time i did that the internet was much more different)

No.360

When do you talk to new women and how has that worked out?

No.378

>>332

7cups.com

be a listener

Tons of needy women

No.380

>>360

I've been through dating websites a few years ago. It never really worked out. I could get first dates but nothing past that, both because the autism showed in person and also because I didn't really want to go any further. Normalfags, especially women, say one thing and think another.

There was one time where I was set for a first date with a girl and suddenly she cancels saying "I'm so busy this week :/". So I say ok, and check back the next week, she says the same thing, I check back again, she says the same thing, I check back again, she never answers. I pondered the matter until I figured out that she wasn't really busy, just didn't want to go anymore for some reason. She probably met Chad.

After that lesson, it became pretty hard to interact with women, because I always wondered what they really meant whenever they said anything, without being able to grasp when there actually were implications and when there were none. Soured the whole fucking thing.

No.388

>>378

You must really like 7cups because you've posted it in a couple threads. Has it worked for you?

No.393

>>380

>So I say ok, and check back the next week, she says the same thing, I check back again, she says the same thing, I check back again, she never answers.

By the second time you shoulda assumed she wasn't interested and didn't want to say it directly. If you want some on point relationship advice about this kind of stuff, I suggest checking out this channel: https://www.youtube.com/user/coachcoreywayne

Here's some random stuff I'll throw out:

- Groom yourself and dress well. Look up tutorial videos and research everything so you can improve your personal look.

- You should aim for a girl your equal in both looks and mental issues. (That's why the previous is important, since it raises the bar.)

No.396

>>332

>but I'm not religious.

Have you ever tried going to church?

No.399

>>393

Not the best advice tbh. Weed can make you more anxious, and adderal can make you jumpy. Not really sure how adderal would help in the first place really.

No.413

>>396

Yes I have, along with praying and supplicating and reading and immersing myself in the culture. But my brain simply doesn't bend that way.

>>399

Yeah, I used to smoke weed, but then it started making me really anxious and giving me ectopic heartbeats, so I stopped. I still have a quarter of some high-CBD weed but I'm afraid to try it in case it has the same effect as regular weed. I don't really want to try Adderall either.

No.420

Are you autistic enough to go to /tulpa/ learn to make a psychological emanation of a fully conscious human being? I know I am.

No.423

Can you meet women IRL with some activity that you do together like uni or work or a hobby?

No.424

>>332

If you have a job and some money you could always hire a hooker just to get rid of your /v/ card. V card as in Virgin. That could help you out quite a bit. Just make sure you wear a condom and try to find one thats not real nasty looking of course. backpage.com seems to be the most popular place to look for local prostitutes. Don't do it a lot though because there is a, fairly small risk, of law enforcement. But on the very very small chance you get caught just tell them you are autistic and a virgin and you wanted to get laid. They'll probably let you go or give you a slap on the wrist.

No.427

>>424

Backpage is down.

No.440

>>332

Find a Buddhist dojo and give meditation a try.

No.441

>>427

>>427

Really? They finally took that site off the net I guess.

No.462

>>424

I've already done that, with a, I shall say, "specialist" in cases like mine.

No.498

You legit make me sick, and I'm no normie by any means.

sage

No.781

File: 081056d3efbb2eb⋯.jpg (1.06 MB, 1288x1803, 1288:1803, 1402179802529.jpg)

>>332

Anon, l have some tips for you and other anons.

Change your view about women. Women and anyone in general smell bitterness and it will come out on your behaviors whether you intended it or not. This will cause people to avoid you and normies can pick up negative vibes. lm not saying to act happy and hopped up all the time but, to watch yourself form becoming a negative nancy.

For dating and relationships, Get a life coach that deals with autism and relationships. A life coach will help you with the ins and outs of dating, relationships, and marriage if you are far down on the line. A life coach isnt the same as a psychologist.

For anxiety, investigate mindfulness , desiderata, a meditation app and defensive pessimism. Im not a think positive type of person so try thinking negative. With defensive pessimism, you have to have anxiety and motivation. Without this, it becomes learned helplessness. Sure, it takes up more mana and sanity than being optimistic, but the results pay off.

Good luck, and here's some hot nigger women

No.837

Quick question, OP. Are you getting free autism bux? I tried to apply for it but got told unless i'm a full shut-in who gives up I get jack shit for help.

No.941

>>837

Yeah, I get full free autismbux, about 1k a month.

No.942

>>941

Not him but fucking hell, I'm a sperg + full shut-in and I've only gotten £400 a month at best. 12K a year isn't too far off minimum wage here. Do you live alone or with a parent?

No.945

>>781

>that picture

good taste.

No.948

>>942

Over here full autismbux is about half the minimum wage before taxes. I'm not sure how much tax one would pay on min wage. If you get BTFO by the medical Jew at the bux office you get "regular" bux, which is half of medical.

I live with my mom (I'm also a full shut-in). I get the full amount even though I'm living with my mom because she's retired and technically poorfag but she owns the house and we have no debt between us so we have more effective income than the numbers alone imply. I give her $400 per month for my share of the food, taxes and utilities, and I keep the rest to spend as I want. I generally save$150-200 and spend the rest.

I have to admit that on the financial side I really, absolutely can't whine.

No.949

>>948

Damn, I'm jelly. My mum is still working herself to death as a hairdresser, and doesn't completely own this shitty small house. She also has a "boyfriend" she doesn't like or enjoy the company of living here because she can't afford to lose his money (he's a real oaf and makes less than her as a retail security guard).

I don't really have money leftover to spend on non-essentials either, which I can live without but it would be nice to have enough income to do so. The job I had wasn't worth the extra cash, I was getting paid about £1K a month for working my nuts off in a filthy factory for 9 hours a day, 5 days a week, and left with virtually no free time to actually make use of it. I much prefer the frugal NEET life over that bullshit.

No.956

No.961

>>332

online girlfriend

No.969

>>961

How would an autistic NEET get one of those? Don't say tinder because that shit is cancer.

No.1016

File: bcd45f22d727575⋯.jpg (54.2 KB, 564x789, 188:263, 91e2f52bfe3ef01e8332f921cf….jpg)

>prosopagnosia

So when you say you want a non-repulsive girl, a qt, you mean it in in body and behavior (and not smelly and crap)? I don't mean to insult your ability or desires, I'm just a little curious of your perception of attraction (-or hell, does your alexithymia conflict with that?).

-and hey, I'm also autistic and soon to be going on to 26 myself. While I can see faces I have a very terrible memory (I couldn't attempt to draw a picture of my mom without reference if I wanted to) and I have a hard time in feeling anything is beautiful. If you don't already I'd like to treat yourself nicely, care for you body and as I see it you may as well go on imagining you're handsome. Labors of love can lead to genuine affection with your investment and appreciation of your work, nurturing yourself.

-because I have a terrible memory I'll leave you my Skype is case I forgot this thread and you wanted to talk for the hell of it. I don't have answers for you but… I could pretend to be cute for you? I tend to like to do that.

Skype:shammyal011

No.1043

Find an autistic hobby and stop thinking about gf. It's easy to fall into a loop of self-pity and tangle yourself up so much that you can't unwind out of it. Keep yourself distracted from that.

It's not like you can do anything to change your situation, besides landing in that one in a trillion perfect situation where a girl just as autistic as you falls in love with you and vice versa. But don't cling to that possibility because it is really one in a trillion.

Be your own self and learn to enjoy your own company. You'll need to in order to avoid feeling lonely. Easier said than done, believe me, I know. But it beats falling into despair.

No.1050

>>332

>>333

get a nice job that you can support a family with and find a girl in her mid to low 20s

No.1052

>>1050

That's obviously the goal, at least for me ( >>333 ), but unfortunately I can't just click my fingers and make those things happen, otherwise I would have done it years ago. OP and I are both autistic NEET shut-ins in our mid-20s, and it's difficult to climb out of that hole once you're in it, particularly if you've never really been out of it.

No.1069

>>332

I had a similar problem OP, and while I can't give advice to get a qt what I can say is getting some friends helps a lot. I know thats much easier said than done for a lot of people but I was in awful shape and ready to kill myself, hell I tried to a couple time but then I got a small group of friends and I've gotten better and better ever since. They poke fun at me from time to time because of the problems I have but only in the way that friends do. Basically what I'm saying is the best way to transition to getting a qt girl is to try to get friends and improve social ability. Sorry if I couldn't be of more help but thats my advice.

No.1073

>>1069

I know exactly what you mean. Friends are oftentimes the key to getting girlfriends. Not only will you meet new people through friends, but you'll hone your social skills and be ready for an encounter with an eligible girl. It might sound stupid, but think of it like martial arts training. You're not going to win a fight if you've never even practiced a punch.

No.1076

>>1069

>>1073

I'm not OP I wish I had friends, but for whatever reason, it just hasn't happened. I set out to improve myself a little over two years ago with only two real goals; to start talking to girls, and to make some friends. Neither of those things have been accomplished, to any extent.

It's just infuriating at this point, I've begun to believe that if you ever reach a state of having literally 0 friends, then it's almost impossible to escape that state. It means I can't improve my social skills, which naturally makes it harder to make friends, and I certainly won't be talking to girls or getting a girlfriend.

No.1080

>>1076

Reposting a relevant paragraph from a previous post, so just ignore it if you see it again. I originally wrote it about how bacd online friends are, but it's more about making friends in general. I'd like to hear the answers to the questions I ask and maybe I can help you a little bit more:

I know exactly what you mean. Most people I've gotten to know online turn out to have so much baggage that they're just emotionally exhausting and hard to deal with. How old are you? As long as you're not a middle-aged man yet, you still have hope to make friends. Even if you were, you might be able to become friends with an old drunk or two. What are some ways that you can meet people? Are you in university? Do you work? Do you drink? If you're more into video games, are there any clubs in your area?

Once you start looking for friends, you'll find them. You just can't be afraid of rejection.

No.1083

>>1080

I was actually the post above you in that thread.

>How old are you?

25

>What are some ways that you can meet people?

None really, I'm NEET.

>Do you drink?

I do not.

>If you're more into video games, are there any clubs in your area?

I have no idea, I'm into mostly retro vidya, not the latest multiplayer FPS, cinematic blockbuster, or whatever everyone else is into. I don't know anything about clubs around here if they exist, but I wouldn't really be able to join one. I have large problems with anxiety and getting myself around. I can take walks and I can go to the shops on my own if I really push myself, but beyond that I have no experience of going about the world independently. I can't take a bus yet for example.

>Once you start looking for friends, you'll find them

I dunno, I've been wanting friends since 2008, and I've been proactive with trying to fix my life since 2015, but I've had no luck with making friends yet.

No.1091

File: cb0772d7afe0393⋯.jpg (593.72 KB, 1289x1600, 1289:1600, YG38m4l.jpg)

>>1083

Friends aren't going to fall into your lap, anon. You need to focus on yourself and then once you can get around and hang out with people you can start to make friends. As the old saying goes, it takes a friend to have friends. If you can't even get around enough to have lunch with people or interact with them IRL in meaningful ways, you can't expect them to carry the friendship for you.

No.1097

>>1091

>Friends aren't going to fall into your lap

>it takes a friend to have friends

That's what I was saying, when you hit the 0 friends mark, you're pretty much fucked. I would never expect anyone to a carry a friendship for me, but in my situation that's not even an option because I don't ever come into contact with anyone. And because I don't ever come into contact with anyone, it's difficult to improve. And like I said, I have spent the last two years, minus the last few months, focusing solely on improving myself. I knew it would take a long time to leave the NEET hikki world, but I didn't think it would take possibly 3 - 5 years just to get to the point where I start trying to make friends.

No.1103

>>1097

Well, I'm sorry that it has taken this long for you. It might take longer then. You're not fucked at the 0 friends mark though.

When I say "it takes a friend to have friends" it means that you have to be able to actively go out of your way to interact with people. If you don't have a car or mode of transportation, it makes that a hell of a lot harder. If you have to, just focus on being mobile right now. It will make your life a lot better. You can't go from Step 1 to Step 3 and skip Step 2; you have to take things one at a time. If it takes 3 - 5 years, then that's what it's going to take. If you really want to leave the hikki world, it will be worth it.

No.1106

>>1103

Yeah I know that's what I need to do, in fact it's exactly what I was doing until last September. Last year I started taking driving lessons, which I never imagined I'd ever be able to do. However, to cut a long story short, after 7 lessons I had to stop for a few months. Right now I'm just trying to build my momentum back up meaning reimplementing things like sleep pattern and taking regular showers, I fell pretty far back into the deep end of depression between December and February so I can start doing things like that again.

No.1111

>>1106

I know how that feels. I've struggled with depression before. Two tips from my experience: 1. Get into a routine and 2. Take things one day at a time (i.e. make daily goals and stick with them rather than focusing on big picture things that are hard to easily accomplish. You'll accomplish the big picture problems without the unneeded anxiety.)

No.1133

>>1016

Well my prosopagnosia is pretty mild, I can see faces when they're in front of me, but it's pretty much out of sight out of mind. I can recognize people from their hair and their voices so it's not actually that big an impairment in day to day life, but unless I have a person in front of me I'd be hard-pressed to tell you how they look like and I can't recognize anybody out of context, sometimes even with hair info.

Since faces don't stick in my memory they're not that important to me. A plain girl with qt mannerisms is more than enough for me.

As for my perception of attraction, I have only this point of reference so I'm not sure whether or not I could explain it, but attraction and lust and love are all very easy to confuse. Basically my emotions are wide categories. I can say I'm happy, I'm sad, I'm scared, I'm aroused. But I couldn't describe the degree or the precise quality.

No.1143

>>1133

>Basically my emotions are wide categories. I can say I'm happy, I'm sad, I'm scared, I'm aroused. But I couldn't describe the degree or the precise quality

This must be more the autism side of things, because I've always had this trouble too. I couldn't describe how I'm feeling emotionally to save my life, it's basically just "very good feels" or "very bad bad feels", with a huge indiscernible grey area known as "okay I guess" in the middle.

No.1220

>>1133

>attraction, lust and love are easy to confuse

Well that's pretty normal I think, it probably becomes clearer with experience which you say you don't have. As for describing the lengths of your emotions I have that problem (probably something in the autism like the other guy says) but it's more that my feelings are inhibited away too quickly. I come off as unfriendly and it's definitely not untrue (I reserve endless love for the rare person who does make me happy and largely disregard others) but I find that people want to talk to some jerk like me because they see that I do try my best and give a damn at my job. People aren't all born as attractive as others but as cliché as it sounds I believe that being as genuine a you as you can be is the best road you can take. -that and confidence and hard work. I mean gaining companionship starts with letting people in and that starts with showing who you are. -but this is all the opinion of someone without friends to go be with and do things with himself.

No.1939

>>1097

You're not fucked though. Just work on it anon and friends will find their way into your life.

No.1945

>>1939

I'm trying man, I really am, but I've yet to get very far.