No.106663
>hey anon
>I uhh
>I enjoy spending time with you
>you are very cute and funny
>I feel so safe in your presence, you can explain just about everything to me
>I… I r-
> I r-really like you a-anon
>I'm just wondering if you f-feel the same for me
No.106664
No.106665
>>106664
>b-but I love you so much anon
No.106668
>>106665
I love you too Anon.
No.106669
>>106663
No, get out of here Richard.
No.106670
>mfw even if this impossible scenario happened I'd be too jaded to think it's genuine and think she'd be mocking me
No.106673
>>106670
It happens and she is mocking you.
No.106677
>>106668
>You thought I was serious?
>what kind of fucking loser are you anon?
>do you really think any woman could ever be attracted to you?
No.106681
>>106677
I was talking to you behind the keyboard.
No.106683
No.106695
>Yes, I love you too.
>When we first met I-
>[knocking at door intensifies]
>"Oh kickass, my game's here."
>"I'll keep playing Dating Sim #7392 later, it's time for Weebshit: The Otaku Question!"
>[turning off the computer intensifies]
No.106706
>>106663
I will never in my life hear a girl say this to me. Ever.
No.106708
>>106706
>Not letting some roastie waste your time with her emotional baggage bullshit and suckering you into investing physical and mental effort for nothing but pain.
Good on you anon
good on you
No.106713
>>106663
>you are very cute and funny
If you think you have to lie to cheer me up, then it's safe to say anything you feel for me is not the same as what I feel for you.
No.106716
File: 1454553919840.jpg (312.75 KB, 1750x2500, 7:10, classic-purple-pimp-costum….jpg)
>>106663
>Sheeeeeiiiit bitch you know you my bottom bitch
>gnomesayin?
>Now hand over yo earnin's to daddy
>Yeah das what i'm talking 'bout
>gnomesayin?
>now git yo ass back on dat corner bitch an remember how much you love your daddy
No.106718
>>106663
>uhh t..t.thanks you too
>WAIT I uhhh what I mean to say is that uhhh
>I like you t..to m'lady
>I mean i like, like you as a friend and uhh you know and stuff
>If it uhh makes you feel better I r..really like spending uhhh time with you and stuff too
>We should umm uhhh we should y..you know uhh spend more time together and uhh umm you know because we are such good friends and uhh
>s…sorry I uhh have to go
No.106720
File: 1454554576935.jpg (64.56 KB, 468x381, 156:127, article-0-0203081200000578….jpg)
>>106719
>>106663
>Whoa ya babe like far out
>Yeah you know I love ya too baby
>You got my fix girl?
>You know how I get when I don't have muh fix
>What do ya mean we ain't got nothin left to sell?
>Ok so maybe selling the house and putting the kids up for adoption to save money wasn't the best idea but you know me babe I've got big plans and big things are gonna happen soon
>Just like, get out there and get me my fix you know? Borrow some money from anon if you have to. That dweeb will give any girl with a sad face money.
No.106723
>>106663
>Yes Hu-Mon female our time together has been pleasant and informative
>I have learned much about your people
>Your help in my mission has been most appreciated
>I must reject your romantic feeling though
>Interracial relations between reptilians and Hu-Mons is highly frowned upon by the council of eleven.
>Farewell Hu-Mon female I must return to my home planet and report my findings to the citadel overlord
>When the time comes I will speak favorably of you and petition the invasion foreman to give you preferential treatment as a palace slave.
No.106726
My brain is going haywire.
I'm looking at the URL, and it doesn't say 4chan, yet this thread exists.
What the fuck.
No.106727
>>106726
Loosen up pal.
What threads should be posted anyway huh?
What are the 8chan approved r9k threads?
We can only talk about tfw no gf, muh depression, and brownies for so long before it gets stale.
No.106735
>>106726
react to op faggot
No.106741
>>106723
this my favourite so far
drug addict is close tho
No.106758
>fingerless gloves
Completely unjustifiable.
No.106759
>>106758
>>106719
>tfw no qt hobo waifu to ride the rails and panhandle with
No.106765
>>106670
me too.
shed probably just be mocking me.
just like mom and dad
No.106768
File: 1454564447595.jpg (187.07 KB, 874x914, 437:457, white_knight_in_war_by_lif….jpg)
>>106663
>Forsooth maiden fair I doth reciprocate thy feelings
>Yea verily we shall be wed by the morrow before I abscond to the holy land
>If I may have a lock of your hair and your blessing fair lady I knoweth that I shall triumph over the enemies of the cross and crown
>Upon mine triumphant return I shall make thou impregnated with mine seed and if thou survives the work of the midwives we shall live happily thereafter and die together of old age in our 40's
No.106770
>>106663
>tfw my waifu will never say this to me
>tfw pillows don't talk
No.106773
>>106663
>You think this is funny?
>Taking her face and mocking me?
>Is this how you get your kicks you SICK FUCK!
>What have you done with her? WHERE'S MY FAMILY DAMMIT!?!
>You won't get away with this… You and the others…I'll stop you…
>So help me God I'll STOP YOU.. and THE OTHERS! Before you replace anyone else!
No.106796
>>106663
I really like you too.
in fact, I made you this delicious slushie, I like you so much.
it's so good. *takes a tiny sip and then hands it to you*
No.106798
>>106796
**it begins
now time for some really unoriginal content**
No.106800
Electronics engineer with robotics experience here.
If real women can fake those lines, then it'll be easy to make robots or VR companions to recite the same, and it'll be more genuine.
We just need to be able to automate the typical dating sim lines so that an AI could come up with them on its own.
No.106803
>>106798
Spoiler fail
First day on 8chan?
;)
No.106829
>>106796
Why would you do this when she wants it out of free will anyway?
uh I don't care deliver your story
No.106830
>>106765
>just like mom and dad
wtf is wrong with parents ? how can they mock their very own son?!
No.106832
>>106830
http://www.newstatesman.com/glosswitch/2014/05/only-feminism-can-stop-my-sons-growing-hate-women
>It is 2014 and boys are still turning into men who don’t like women. And okay, it’s not all men, but even the ones who don’t actively hate us are perfectly capable of exploiting, objectifying and demeaning us. When misogyny is naked and extreme, in men such as Peter Sutcliffe, Marc Lépine, Anders Breivik or Elliot Rodger, we’re quick to position it as an aberration but we know that it is not.
No.106867
I had a creepy stalker girl constantly begging to show me her boobs online. I of course thought this was my chance and asked her out. She stopped talking to me.
>not even your stalkers want to date you
No.106874
>I feel so safe in your presence
>do you feel the same for me
Able to feel safe around a woman? When did that last occur, A.D.1816?
With all of todays shittests, mindgames and legal landmines you might as well lay down on a highway.
No.106877
Where's the camera crew hiding?
No.106919
>>106796
I want slushie nao
>>106768
>Upon mine triumphant return I shall make thou impregnated with mine seed
>not burning a redhead for witchery and promiscuity
No need to bother, she will get pregnant with chads seed as soon as you turn your back. You'll just have to rise the kid then.
No.106932
No.106967
>>106932
>what anon?!
>you donot remember me?
>but I thought this was something special
>I thought you were different
>you are the same as all the others
>I will never be able to trust another men
>I will never have aryan children because of you
No.106970
>>106663
I'm not a good man. Go away before you get hurt.
No.106975
>>106663
>Well- I say- Well I think you've got the wrong chicken there, girl
>I don't ever recall exchangin' first names, let alone any gen-yoo-ein feelings of affection
>I hear the market is live and kickin' this time-o-the year, if you know what I'm gettin' at
>That gal is a few feathers short of a molting goose, if you catch my drift
No.106985
>>106967
>I will never have aryan children because of you
Wow, maybe that's because I'm jewish
No.106994
>>106970
>why do you do that to me?
>why ano?!
>tell me her name!!!
>who is this bitch who stole you from I
>I will rip her heart out and eat it
>then we can be a couple
>r-right sweetheart?
No.106995
>>106985
>please subvert me
No.106997
>>106994
No. I can play this game and pretend one girl would declare herself on me, but I just ccan't pretend there could ever be another.
[spoiler]Though this is highly pleasing my yanderefag side[/spoier]
No.106999
>>106997
>so this will all just a game for you
>Am I no more than a toy?
>do you not care for me at all?
>==TELL ME HER NAME!==
>==I WILL DRINK HER BLOOD AND CUR HER UTERUS OPEN==
No.107006
>>106999
I don't know which is sadder; that you'd produce a catered reply to me, or that I'm starved enough for any kind of attention to come back and answer even though I have nothing meaningful to say.
No.107007
>>107006
>you are the same as all the others
>I will join a monastary now and become a nun
>it is all your fault
No.107008
>Come again? Couldnt hear ya. hand an earbud in.
listening to nothing. just buying time
Meanwhile, inside my subconscious
>"Mr.Ego, i'm TMI"
>"Balls?"
Back to reality
>Im not sure if you know this or not, but there has been something i've wanted to tell you for a long time,
>*pause of minor anxiety*
Back to head
>"If I tell her off, will you die?"
>"it would be extremely cringy"
>"you're a blunt guy"
>"for you"
>I d-don't understand why you're so good to me. You have guy friends, some of whom are
are better looking, funnier and whatnot. You don't have to lie to me for me to enjoy your company.
I'm a tough cookie.
More infighting within the head
>"Is getting laid part of your plan?"
>"Of course!"
>"Tell me more about this master plan"
>"I'm crashing that ass, with no survivors"
Back to life again.
>But I suppose none of that matters.
>*holds hands*
>Being around you makes my days so much better
>*whispers close*
>the answer is yes
>>106670
I can just about any handle malicious banter but this kills the feel.
No.107077
>>107008
>Baneposts internally while carrying out conversations
My man, you are completely insane.
No.107081
>>106663
>Well, that's something. Never expected anyone to say that to me.
>I like you too.
>So, you still cool to go innawoods? I'm bringing my guns out. You'll have fun.
>You ever heard of a game called Stalker? No? Well, you're in for a treat. I brought milsurp, vodka, and a guitar with me.
>No clue how to play, but we'll be drunk enough that it sounds good enough.
>tfw no qt to go innawoods and be cheeki breeki with
No.107085
>>106663
Th-th-th-th-th-th-th-th-th-th-th-th-th-th-thanks-s-s. I-I-I-I-I-I f-f-f-f-f-fee-fee-feel th-th-the s-s-s-s-s-s-same w-w-w-w-w-w-way a-ab-abo-abou-abou-about-about y-y-y-y-y-y-y–y-yy-y–y-y-y-y-y-y–y-y-y-y-y-y–y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y–y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y–y-y-y-y–y-y-y-y-y-y–y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y–y-y-y-yy–y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y–y-you too.
blox
No.107093
>>106663
>Ayyy bay-bee
>I love you, yes?
>We make sexy time very much OK?
>You are most beautiful girl in all of world, yes?
>I smell your hair and make aroused
>We go back to my hut and I am be sex make with you, yes?
>Very much good times, OK bay-bee?
No.107098
>>107077
lol. you know mine was the best one yet.
No.107213
No.107214
We've known each other for so long
Your heart's been aching, but
You're too shy to say it
Inside, we both know what's been going on
We know the game and we're gonna play it
And if you ask me how I'm feeling
Don't tell me you're too blind to see
No.107216
>>107214
>that was so d-deep anon
>fuck me
No.107217
>>106663
Hello random woman we never spend time together I am neither cute nor funny I am not in peak physical condition I am not a likable person I am not wondering if I feel the same because I don't now leave me alone before I unload my assburgers all over you.
Oh shit I just did I would love to retreat to my home lock myself in and play video games on my personal computer and maybe shitpost some and argue with trannies on youtube.
No.107332
No.107378
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
>>107216
>fuck me
JOO WAN TO FUCK ME, TONY?
No.107401
>>106663
>U-u-u-u-u-uuhhhhh…
>N-n–n-n-n-n-nnn-n-
>U-uh…
>O-o-o-o-ok-k-kay…
No.107594
>>107378
>s-sure
>>107401
>o-okay?
>is this yes?
No.107597
DUBS SUMMONS THE CONDUCTOR
No.107606
>>107597
I can relate to this person so much it is not even funny any more
No.107671
"Chad is picking you up in five minutes right?"
No.107695
>>107671
>C-chad
>b-but Anon you are the only man I have contact with
No.107821
>>107695
>be her one and only
>you spend years together
>you begin to depend on each other
>she leaves you as soon as she gets the first option to trade up
>"but before you go… how about a slushie for a road?"
>while she's passed out, rape her, then tie her to a bed in the basement/your secret hideout and use her at your leisure
No.107828
>>107821
>>she leaves you as soon as she gets the first option to trade up
>I'd never do that anon
>I'm not like the others
>I have only got eyes for you I do not care about the others
>please trust me
No.107852
>>107828
>please trust me
only if you trust this slushie
come on. just one.
No.107864
>>107852
>>107863
>of course anon
>I would do anything for you
>s-since we are officially a couple now
>—I…I..it is just…
No.107865
File: 1454966677519.jpg (124.18 KB, 736x981, 736:981, e374a5a5e53a1237585738a44b….jpg)
are we still going with the homeless narrative?
>give her one of these
>she hasn't eaten in a couple days, so she sucks the whole thing down in minutes
>it kills her
No.107867
>>106663
Mh… I don't know, the "cute and funny" line might be a little too forced in, y'know ? Maybe jut cut to the chase and tell him outright that you like him. I mean, it's pretty impossible not to fall for you when you're being cute like that.
No.107870
>>107867
>I mean, it's pretty impossible not to fall for you when you're being cute like that.
>why do you love me anon?
No.107871
>>107870
is this a trick? I've been tricked before.
many many times before. :(
No.107875
>>107871
>why can't you just trust me anon?
>Am I not beautiful enough?
>you do not even love me
>Am I this repulsive?! Why are you doing this to me;_;
No.107876
>>107870
Why ? Because you're one the cutest funniest happiest snarkiest mess of a human being I've ever bore witness too. But we really shouldn't be talking about this, trust me when I say it won't go anywhere pleasant; you should focus on the guy you like.
No.107890
>>107876
>you should focus on the guy you like.
>w-why do you shun me anon?
>Am I this ugly?
>there is another girl isn't there?
>just tell me you hat me it is fine
>I know you hate me,at least be brave enough to tell it to my face
>what is her name?
No.107895
>>107890
You know you shouldn't be toying with my emotions like this. It's not a nice thing to do. We both know there can't be another girl, there can't be any girl, that's simply not how it works for me.
I don't hate you, far from it actually. It's just that… alright, let's pretend you actually like me; you deserve better than me. I don't know how you managed to bring yourself down to lil' old me, but the minute you'll open your eyes to the world, you'll realize that I'm the bottom of the barrel.
Let me be selfish, just this once: let me not burden yourself with the shit I call myself, and let yourself find happiness with a better dude. It shouldn't be hard; you simply have to take a walk in any given street.
No.107902
>>107895
>JUST TELL ME HER NAME
>is she p-prettier than m-me
>WHERE DID YOU GET TO KNOW THIS BITCH
>d-does she love you the same as…as I
>d…do you love her too
>I WILL PEEL HER SKIN OFF I WILL I WILL POKE HER EYEBALLS OUT I WILL EAT HER LIVING LIVER
>t-then you will be m-mine anon, r-right?
>we can be together forever when she is gone
>I would do everything to be with you anon, she can't stand between us do you understand?
No.107928
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
>>107902
gee who's this starting to sound like?
No.107930
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
>>107928
nothing I've heard makes this show sound even remotely good but you'll watch it anyway you stupid chumps
No.108091
Sorry but I'm not white. I don't believe in race mixing. Please, go off and meet a white man and have beautiful white children. Our relationship was not meant to be. Maybe in an alternative universe, where we are both of the same race, but not like this…. I'm sorry…. I was meant to find a cute Asian gf.
No.108096
>>107928
>>107930
>A..a-non;_;
>this is not you
>I know you, you would never say such things
>you would never compare me to another girl anon
>this is her
>she has brain washed you
>we need to get her out of your head anon
>I am here for you
>just say how much you love me ok?
>>108091
>gtfo aryans only
No.108106
>>107930
MN is complete garbage, some people like it for the "so bad it's good" aspect though. And casuals like it because they're casuals and don't know any better.
No.108243
>>106663
>[Breathes heavily]
>[Brandishes Knife]
>[Puts her in trunk]
>[Takes her back to the hideout]
>[Strips her naked]
>[Chains her to the floor]
>[Heavy breathing intensifies]
>[Brush her hair]
>[Feed her a bowl of hard boiled eggs and a slushie]
No.108327
I like this thread
unoriginal as fuck but I don't care
No.108365
>be at uni
>studying physics
>i like physics
>i also like that girl in physics
>which is coming to me
>why is she coming to me
>she is defently coming to me
>hey, have you done physics?
>y-yeah
>hands start to shiver
>can you explain that part?
>s-sure
>i somehow manage to explain without fainting
>have you done maths?
>yeah i have, but I have no idea how to explain it, you can ask me 2 mates over there
>oh, then it doesn't matter
>ufokkewot.gif
>she then stands there
>looks at me
>smiles
>and i did nothing
No.108376
>>108365
she wanted the d you pleb
No.108407
>oh hey anon?
>why were you in your room this whole time?
>I just met two new friends from India!
No.108421
>>106663
Hell, Ill make another. Love these Copypasta OC threads.
>You to!
>shit
>I mean Yes yes I do
HEAD SWEATY, GAME WEAK, FEEL IS HEAVY
>I just didnt expect you to ever say that to me. Though I was friendzo-nly?
>(shit)
MOMS SHAGHETTI MOMS SPAGHETTI
>Youre not ugly,I-I think you're a hot mess actually
>No one has ever admitted that to me before, never found myself to be much
>shit
HE /ROBOT/, BUT LOOKS NORMIE DICK AT THE READY
TO BLOW LOADS, BUT HE KEEPS FORGETTING HIS MOMS SPAGHETTI, HIS FEELS COME OUT
HE OPENS HIS MOUTH BUT THE WORDS WONT WORK OUT
No.108596
>>106663
>It is the year 5,345,983,475
>If I am the owner of my thoughts I am the owner of my currency
>I am the owner of my thoughts
>Therefore I am the owner of my currency
>Lucid dreaming across the astral plane I touch the infinite
>Nothing exists save for time and empty space
>And you
>You are but a thought
>[Pulls out gun]
No.108603
I promised myself never to fall in love again.
Way to painful.
Now I feel that old clutch slipping again because of a really shy German girl.
Fucking piece of shit doesn't take any torque to speak of.
No.108848
>>106663
>tfw no chick acts cutesy like this anymore because she already handled more sausages than a hotdog manufacturer by age 14
No.108859
NO, This happened to me
> Be me playing Fallout 4
> Be texting qt girl I actually asked out
>"I love you Anon"
>I text her back (being the Beta I am) I love you too
>Next week I get cucked by a white boi
> occasionally talk to her and remind her that she's a slut with problems
No.108861
>>108859
how the FUCK can any human consider this acceptable human behavior?
and yet this is so common, it's almost a joke when you hear about a guy that HASN'T experienced it.
No.108862
>>107902
There. Is. No. Other. This I can swear to you in front of God, the Devil, or any saint you believe in.
No.108863
>>108848
Wrong.
Probably not original.
No.108866
>>108861
The things I actually ask is stuff like "How's the guy you went out with, you know, the one you chose over me" , she actually made me feel like she cared. She always told me shit like "Hey anon you make me smile", "Hey I love your jokes anon, thanks for being with me"
No.108870
>>108863
you are a cuck.
DEFINITELY not original
No.108873
>>108870
I actually have been a cuck and felt quite annoyed at the situation but that is not the discussion at hand.
I'm saying it's wrong because it's an absolute, and I personnally know of two counter-examples (one of them can even qualify of being "pure", as you people call it).
But of course, I'm a stranger on the Internet ; my words are not to be trusted.
No.110482
>>108106
You don't insult one of my favorite chinese cartoons without giving me reasons.
Speak, fuccboi.
No.111117
>>106663
if any girl that hot say something like that to you, it is 100% guaranteed she's just trying to fuck with you and humiliate you.
No.111123
Fuck no I don't.
>>106669
Aww poor Richard…
No.111178
>>110482
>plot is unfocused and follows no logical progression
>generic 2tragic4me backstories for everyone
>unoriginal, one-dimensional characters
I don't care if it's your favorite anime, but that doesn't make it not shit.
Not who you originally replied to by the way, but please expound on why you think Mirai Nikki is good.
No.111197
>>106663
>I feel the same way about you too.
>But I think we should make the terms of this relationship clear at the start.
>You don't have to tell me anything you've done.
>slides over a bowl of eggs
>But you do have to eat these.
No.111219
>>111117
>HAHAhahaha liek OMG Tiffany I told anon that I loved him and he totally fell for it :-)
>He got all choked up and weepy and was saying how he always felt the same but was too afraid to say
>Then the loser actually told me that this was the happiest day of his life, CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT?
>HAHAhaha good one Stacy you sure showed anon
>Oh look here he comes now with his BMW
No.111223
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
>>111219
do you see the woman in the window?
No.111809
>>106804
it is full of normies though you twats.
No.111810
>>108407
Those are colombian you fucktard
No.116394
>>106663
Who is this red-haired angel? Pls I need the sauce for scientific reasons!
No.116484
>>106832
>Anders Breivik
What the fuck did Breivik do that was misogynistic? All he did was identify the problem of Islamization and take action. He's a hero as far as I'm concerned.
No.116627
>>108243
Does anyone have a screenshot of that thread?
No.116633
>>116484
only reason I can even imagine is that he's guilty of being a white male, therefor he is automatically a racist sexist (ie misogynistic) xenophobic homophone.
No.116645
>>106759
LADY!! LOOK OOUUTT THERE'S A TRA-
No.116650
>>106663
>girl says some things along these lines, and that she thinks of us as friends
>not friendzoned because she knows i'm gay anyway, but if she's half as smart as she appears she knows i'm friendless
>start messaging each other
>notice i'm almost always the one to start conversations
>stop messaging and wait for her to message me to remove the crazy idea that she was lying to me from my head, after all, what benefit could it possibly have to lie, even if she was the most evil person in the world?
>wait
>wait
>keep waiting
>she hasn't spoken to me since
WHY
H
Y
i can understand it on a day-to-day basis, where she's got other friends who take less effort, but i refuse to believe she never starts conversations with any of them, and even with that in mind if she's already got plenty of friends then why the fuck lie to a complete loser who has nothing to offer EXCEPT conversation, then reject even that?
even with the paranoid thoughts, like that she just wanted to screenshot me spilling my spaghetti, it doesn't make any sense if she's not trying to get me to speak. just what the fuck is happening?
No.116651
>>116650
You have to understand how normalfags work.
First off, they will call anyone and everyone that doesn't look like a serial killer their friend, and if they get along even remotely well it's already "good friends".
Second, being friends usually doesn't mean anything as far as their input is considered, they'll only use it to get angrier when the friend has failed to do something for them.
There are several explanations for why she hasn't started talking to you since, but the most likely one is that she considers you an average conversational partner, in other words you don't stand out enough to motivate her to contact you so she just glances over the option.
A better gauge of what she thinks of you would be how she responds to you in conversations though, how quickly and how verbosely, if there are any dismissive answers.
No.116656
>>116650
Not saying she did this, but people will lie because they're uncomfortable telling the truth. I think they do it, at least partially, to protect the other person. They know the truth will hurt you. That's why people lie about being busy when they don't want to do something.
No.116663
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
Glad to see that my banepost is still here
>I'm glad you have a high opinion on how I carry out my work, but it's current year, I'm not allowed to have feelings for anyone but my designated virtual gf, as you are not allowed to have feelings for a ….cisgendered male such as myself.
>I won't report this incident to my advisors, but I suggest you keep
your intentions hidden, or I may have my security clearance revoked and your standard civilian NEET privledges terminated and be offered for tribute to the Isamic Council. You do not want that, I do not want that.
Now now, don't look so sad, you may lack the past expertise that allows me to have my job, but I can teach you a few things and you can apply after as a candidate. Can't hurt to try. Want to give it a shot?
HOTWHEELS LET ME POST MY DAMN IMAGE! REEEEEEE