/r9k/ - ROBOT∞

Wow, what an ebin bait fellow 9-gagger :)

>>115478

I was having sex with a 26 year old landwhale at the age of 16. She died of an overdose a few years back, I can't say anything too bad about her now

>>115478

Hopefully when I lose my virginity I'll be raping your corpse.

>>115478

apology for poor english

when were you when wizardhood legend dies

i was sat at home playing vydia when bitch show up at me door and fuck me

'wizard is die'

'no'

and you?????????????

>>115559

>16

>pedo

The feminists got you, too, huh?

>>115562

The autism got you, too, huh?

>>115478

WAHAHAHA

LETS ASK LOSERS ABOUT WHEN THEY LOST THEIR VIRGINITY

BECAUSE THEY ARE VIRGINS

YA GET IT?

XDDDDDS

I'm not mad, I swear

>>115573

I honestly have not seen someone miss the point of one of my posts this much.

Since you'll probably miss the point of this too, allow me to explain.

You see, I was calling you autistic not because of your political views but because you're so eager to bring them up and also because that guy was really just trying to emphasize the /ss/ aspect.

>memetext

I'm not going to argue about this autistic shit anymore. I honestly don't think fucking a 16 year old is pedophilia, And I'm not going to be dragged into some conversation with an autist lashing out at everyone, even people that agree with him.

>15

haha, yeah, that's pretty late OP ;). my first time was when I was 13, always thought that was the average age, but idk lol

but omg, it was soooooo akward when I did it. it was with this kinda cute guy from hs, but I never would have thought he'd be as small as he was lol. We did it at his place, and I'm pretty sure his parents could hear us the whole time. akwwwward

he was a total creep after that though, kept following me around thinking we could get into a relationship. good think I learned from the first time to avoid nice guys who get to clingy haha

>>115590

6/10

would normally 4/10 but you could probably use the upboat since you are browsing here anyways :)

Having secks :^)

I lost my virginity to my kindergarden teacher, I was just 5 years old. She was gorgeous, just 23yo, and when our eyes first meet on my first day of school she knew she couldn't keep her hands off me. during recess all the kids would be outside playing dodgeball and other games but we would fuck in the classroom. Sometimes she would even tell my parents I needed extra tutoring just so she could have more sex with me. After I hit the first grade, she didn't want to stop meeting, so my 5 year old cock continued to meet her body in secret. Today, almost 20 years later, her mind is completely broken and she is my sex slave. Still as addicted to my dick as ever, she has abandonded her job and her family, because it was taking up too much time she could have spent giving pleasure to my cock. Thankfully even in her 40s she is still a semen demon. Of course, this trend has continued with other teachers in my life. I am the 'ALPHA MALE.' And that's the story of how I lost my virginity :^)

I know you faggots are going to REEE at me for this but I really need to get it off of my chest. It's basically the story of why wizchan is right and sex is just a terrible, awful idea.

To my old wizardly bretheren - how desperately I wish I could return to you.

>twenty-first birthday, intend to spend it alone as usual

>have this douchenozzle coworker who announces it to the whole world

>everyone browbeating me into going to some bar with them

>"gotta get shitfaced bro, it's your twenty-first birthday!"

>all saying some variation of this bullshit

>mostly only end up going because felt pressured

>everyone handing me drinks and expecting me to drink them like some sort of fucking ritual

>nine drinks later, my beta is drowned out by the stench of alcohol

>I spot a qt

>go up to her

>grunt out something I don't remember in drunken normiespeak

>evidently she's as shitfaced as I am, because she seems receptive

>right, you all know what happens to ugly guys who sex drunk girls

>sneak out of the bar with her, head to my shitty apartment

>at apartment

>"looks like I'm finally gonna do it after all" ~ t. alcohol

>she takes off her blouse

>off comes the bra

>just comes after my belt buckle next

>everything is spinning

>woman is actually sucking my cock

>she's really going at it

>dick goes limp

>I'm fucking aghast

>dick-sucking stops, gril just looks at me all disappointed

>woman just starts laughing and laughing

>terribly disappointed, but she notices and tells me why she's laughing

>"Check the first letter of every line"

Fucking losers I lost my virginity when I was 4 to my babysitter. Shit was so cash.

having a romantic Valentine's Day with my at the time early high school qt chubby GF.

>>115931

4/10, sorry, that's the best i can do

>>115931

Pretty elaborate, good work

>>115931

"The game niggers also jews did wt"

I don't get.

>>116039

Welcome newfriend, please to lurk the fuck moar faget.

>>116039

wt is supposed to be wtc, read the spoiler as well

dreaming