No.83529
I'm never going to get laid.
No.83535
Just ask her out, worst she can say is no and you are in the same position as now.
No.83543
>>83529
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
No.83550
>>83529
asking girls out via texts is a beta trap, make her say no to your face
No.83553
>>83550
>tfw 6"4 and not a lanklet
>if i ask girls out irl they get intimidated and scared of me
>if i do it over text it's beta as fuck and they say no 100% of the time
why live
No.83558
>haha
>haha
>haha
>haha
>haha
No.83561
>>83529
Just be up front with her man. She'll appreciate it even if she says no. Don't try to dance around it. That's dishonesty.
No.83563
No.83564
>>83529
why do you have a heart in her name?
No.83593
>>83564
This
>mfw OP has a heart next to her name
No.83613
OP that was the most reddit text conversation I have ever read.
>Im a weak beta cuck man…. yay brownie points!!! XDD
>Awwww yeee! (what a quirky way to start off the response) I'll put those brownies right next to the hot cocoa!
holy shit gas yourself, also
>wagecuck
No.83620
>>83529
What do these emojis mean? I can't fucking speak normie well enough now I need to learn fucking modern hieroglyphics?
No.83626
No.83644
File: 1446853949374.jpg (875.15 KB, 1327x1715, 1327:1715, my god please just kill yo….jpg)
>>83529
>>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
holy shit OP
No.83658
Awwww yeeeeeeeeeee: I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa: the thread
No.83659
>>83529
You fucking idiot
>Awwww Yee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa
Damnit ask her to the movies in person. And don't say such beta things or indeed you won't get laid
No.83660
Meanwhile, while Laura is texting you, she's sitting on a sofa at a really cool houseparty somewhere, flanked by two opposing chads while a third one is away mixing her a fruity drink.
>Oh, I'm just texting a guy from work…it's complicated… he's going through a rough time with some customers and stuff. You guys wanna go out back? This music is *really* loud.
No.83661
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies right next to the hot coacoa!
No.83665
>awwwwwww yeeeee my pussy is all dried up now
No.83672
setting yourself up for an incurable STD, false rape accusation, and oops pregnancy?
great job. keep it up, cuck.
No.83675
AWWWWW YEEEEEE!
If a woman calls you dude, mate, or any other similar term of endearment you have been friendzoned with extreme prejudice
No.83691
>>83535
Are you blind my friend? Reread the OP image.
No.83692
>>83553
>6"4 life on easy mode
>still can't get chicks
Kill yourself bro. You are never gonna get any if you can't do it on this difficulty setting.
No.83696
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
No.83698
No.83706
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
Why would you ever write this
No.83710
File: 1446878085217.jpg (25.68 KB, 500x492, 125:123, 90de7ca01997483eeb9f63d8ac….jpg)
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies right next to the hot coacoa!
god dangit OP
No.83715
bumping this kek-filled thread
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
wew lad
No.83720
>Awwww Yee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa
This gave me autism and I already have it.
No.83721
>Awwww Yee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa
kok tep
No.83722
>>83529
Check my dank OC niggas.
>You are now reading OP's message in Rigby's voice
No.83723
No.83725
Is this how normalfags text? It's so strange…
No.83730
why is everyone saying coacoa instead of cocoa?
No.83731
why is everyone saying coacoa instead of cocoa?
shit website is falling to pieces, holyshit
No.83745
>>83731
Because everyone is lazy and copied the text off of this guy
>>83543
No.83763
>>83731
It's the birth of an epic new meme, duh
No.83769
>>83529
>I'll need every bit of his magic
>being a fedora
>when a girl wishes GOD TO BLESS your soul
You deserve all of this.
No.83770
Also keep us updated on the story, you pathetic robot.
Most likely it's already the end anyway though.
No.83771
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot cocoa!
I seriously hope OP is underage because the idea of a grown ass man saying this makes me cringe even more
No.83772
>>83745
that's what I thought
No.83774
Holy sit, OP. Fucking kill yourself you Plebbit sperglord.
No.83778
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot cocoa!
wew lad, this is sure to make her wet as Niagara falls
No.83789
you put a heart in her name in your phone
it's like you started with the intention to fail
No.83790
>>83529
>Laura <3
I hope you are like 14.
Is her ringtone a ballade?
No.83793
awwwwwww yeeeee
no pussy for you~
No.83827
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies right next to the hot coacoa!
I didn't expect to feel this way
No.83831
>>83553
>>if i ask girls out irl they get intimidated and scared of me
>>if i do it over text it's beta as fuck and they say no 100% of the time
Yeah no. If you aren't good looking, being tall only makes you look like a big dumb oaf in their eyes.
No.83836
yeee
oc kikeniggerfaggorbot
No.83886
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot cocoa!
No.83896
>>83827
The way "WAKE ME UP INSIDE" gets cut off as "WAKE ME UP INS-" really disappointed me
No.83902
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
what the fuck
No.83916
xaxaxaxxaxaxxa
holy fuck OP
No.83942
>>83916
Holy fucking shit OP this is amazing.
No.83944
Some one screen cap this thread for all that it good
No.83946
>>83529
Let us all now our heads and pause the lulz in a moment of silence. Let us all pray for our retarded omega brother's soul
No.83960
Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
Pic related, the face the girl had when she read that shit. You deserve everything bad to you OP.
No.83961
>>83535
He already met a fate WORSE than her saying no
No.83969
>awwwwwwww yeeeeeee
Goddamn, you're such a giant faggot that your cringe humors me
No.83971
>awwww yeee!!
Let's make this a meme
No.83980
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot cocoa!
You made my life a bit brighter OP. Thank you.
No.83986
>>83529
>She replies with meaningless/generic sentences
>You text paragraphs
>That heart
I'm sorry anon. AWWWW YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
No.84011
>>83529
What in the actual fuck am I reading? Do you honestly not know how to flirt?
No.84020
>>84011
> Do you honestly not know how to flirt?
Explain it!
No.84022
>>84020
First rule: don't write her a fucking novel with each text.
And get that fucking heart emoji away from her name, faggot
No.84023
>>84022
>First rule: don't write her a fucking novel with each text.
Tell me all!
No.84025
An how long would be appropriate?
Could you provide some example texts of "how to do it" flirts?
No.84026
>>84022
>First rule: don't write her a fucking novel with each text.
What's it when she does this?
No.84029
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
THREAD THEME
It has "aww yee" in it.
No.84032
>>84023
I don't know much of a faggot you've been with her, but you still might be able to salvage this.
Rule #2: if you don't have anything interesting to say, it's better not to say anything. AVOID SPAGHETTI.
Shit chicks don't care about: your boring ass life, Dungeons & Dragons, your autism, your gay job, your dorky friends, anime, your waifu, your stupid hobbies like comic books
No.84033
>>84026
That's okay. Reply with short and sweet.
No.84034
>>84032
>I don't know much of a faggot you've been with her, but you still might be able to salvage this.
Not him, but please tell how OP could solve this situation.
I happen to be in a quite similar one…
>>84033
I must sound really autistic, but how do I do that ;_; pls help I rly like her
No.84049
>>84034
Rule #3: make it a point to tell her something interesting each time you talk to her. Tell her a joke. Tell her a funny story. Sound like an intelligent man, but not a fucking dweeb. In other words, tell her something she didn't know. But don't tell her the physics of the Enterprise's warp drive, nigger.
Rule #4: Don't put her on a pedestal. Rip into her a little playfully. Poke fun at her height, her accent, her typos, if she is blonde tell her a blonde joke, etc. You are taking her ego down a few notches but you aren't killing it. Don't ego-kill. Just poke fun at her. It's flirting. She'll get it.
No.84055
Rule #5: talk to her like she's yours already. Don't be afraid of her. Make sexual innuendo and be clever about it. Double entendre. Makes bitches moist that you want to cum balls deep in her but are clever and don't sound like a rapist.
Rule #6: women are fundamentally masochistic. They get turned on by their own jealousy. Make it a point to let her know that you have attractive women around you and they want your cock. You are a man in demand. Lie if you have to
No.84065
>>84049
>>84055
I agree with all you say.
I have no idea how to go about rule 6 though.
I'm smart and funny, I just don't know how to take this all and get it… where I want it to go.
Rather get me inside of her.
No.84070
>>84065
Simple. Tell her a great looking chick gave you her number or asked what you were doing this weekend. Wing it. Don't give her too much information, which brings up…
Rule #7: be a mystery. Don't reveal all there is to you. Let her wonder. Give as little information about yourself as possible and be cryptic about your answers. If you flip burgers and she asks what you do for a living, say the industry. Something general. Give her unsatisfying answers and then try to change the subject.
Rule #8: you ask the questions, not her. You grill her. You test her. NOT VICE VERSA.
No.84071
>>84070
>Simple. Tell her a great looking chick gave you her number or asked what you were doing this weekend. Wing it.
When? Like we meet
>hi anonina
>has been a while
>you're fine? mhm. you know what some chick gave me her number in uni
>weather is bad lately, don't you think?
>bye
No.84072
>>84070
>Don't give her too much information
you should gimme moar though
No.84073
>>84072
So when she asks what vidya you like don't sperg out and spaghetti all over the place telling her about your level 99 fort in dwarf fortress. Just tell her that you're into minecraft or some normie shit like that. Don't tell her about your exclusive pre-release undubbed anime, just tell her that you're really into Naruto. That kind of thing.
No.84074
>>84073
how to ask a girl out via text?
obviously not like OP did.
No.84076
>>84074
>ay bitch u wanna watch some anime 2morrow nite hmu
No.84077
>>84076
she's not a niggress
No.84079
>>84076
>why are you doin this anon xD
>I thought I was someone special *sniff*
>I had hopes that you were the one to put some hot cocoa next to my brownies but not like that
>I'll go and hit up a more sensitive guy nao
No.84082
>>84079
>ayo im jus sayin i got dat 2hu tho
No.84083
>>84082
>God bless your soul! Good luck with those bastards tomorrow! Good night!
No.84115
>>84074
>>84074
>you like coffee? Great. I know this great cafe. I'll meet you there at 6pm.
And then you wait for a reply
No.84117
>>84073
This. But most girls won't ask you about vidya because they think it's gay. Tell her about vidya AFTER you hit the pussy
No.84119
>>84071
Whenever. Just be nonchalant about it. Be stoic and difficult to read. Uncaring. Aloof. A bit cold
No.84126
>>84117
That's one of the many reasons I've always been terrified of having a girl or anyone really in my room, I've got tons of vidya-related shit and other autistic things everywhere. My room is like an extension of myself, someone else being in it would be like having someone in my mind, judging me for things that are personal to me.
It's so unlikely that I would ever have a girl in my room however or even just speak to a girl IRL for that matter that the idea of getting rid of it all or hiding it "just in case" has never been persuasive enough to me.
No.84128
>>84115
What if she doesn't answer?
No.84129
No.84130
>>84129
>hey you wanna meet tomorrow
>no answer
>uh… what's your favourite colour?
No.84131
>>84130
>h-hey can I spend some of those brownie points?
No.84135
No.84137
>>84135
>God bless your soul! Good night!
No.84139
>>84137
>hittin on me this hard
>u wet biatch?
No.84141
>>84129
about what exactly? how to text with a woman without sperging out?
No.84144
>>84141
It's an algorithm. The more you talk the greater the chance of sperg. So make fewer words count more
No.84151
>>83529
Awwww yeee!
>>84048
critical meme overload, you have been muted for 4 seconds
No.84158
>>84137
I really really like these brownies
No.84172
>>84170
nicely done anon
saved
No.84175
>>84170
HOLY SHIT ANON HAHAHA
No.84178
>>84170
that is hilarious and depressing
11/10 OC
No.84179
>>84158
CAN I PUT THEM NEXT TO HOT COCOA?
No.84180
>>84170
you'll do great my dude :^)
No.84184
>there was OC in /r9k/ and you were there to see it
No.84185
>>84179
>>84158
Haha, thanks for joining us tonight. They're all yours!
No.84191
alright lads we met our OC quota for the year lets get back to posts pepes yeah?
No.84192
I read OPs post and the "Awwww yeee" part didn't bother me.
Fuck this place for reminding me why I never message people.
No.84193
>>84170
/r/ing a frustrated wojack cramming brownies in his mouth with one hand and holding hot cocoa in the other.
No.84200
>>84191
>tfw no hot coacoa brownie gf
plot twist: this is actually Laura <3
No.84214
>>84070
>Rule #7: be a mystery. Don't reveal all there is to you. Let her wonder. Give as little information about yourself as possible and be cryptic about your answers.
Huh, I've been doing all the rules you list already, but this one in particular I adhere to.
I always wondered why my almost rude tone and furtive nature only made people talk to me more.
>>84126
It's all in how you carry it. You're right in that it defines you and is an extension of you, so it's only natural that being ashamed of what's in there means you're ashamed of a part of yourself.
Think about it for a minute, now let's pretend you're not a thirsty nigga and got into a girls room without the intent to fuck. Wall to wall she's got whatever you'd think of as the equivalent to a guy having a bunch of anime girl figures.
Which reaction to your surprise is more appealing? Being embarassed and ashamed of her words and deeds, or thinking absolutely nothing of it unless you asked.
It's like that if a girl walks into your room and gets a faceful of vidya, she won't care if you don't care because she's obviously already comfortable enough with you to go into your room.
No.84246
>>84200
more like POOPinia!
No.84328
this thread should be stickied
No.84335
>5 am
>feel pretty calm
>"maybe i can sleep now"
>"i just hope i don't remember anything bad"
>remember this thread
>its 8 am
No.84336
>>84335
Aww yeeeee!
la iaslkfmerhhr
No.84346
>>84214
I guess the female equivalent would be having a room filled with dolls, teddy bears, and miniature tea sets or something. I'd be a little creeped out, think she was a massive femchild, and suspect her to be potentially life-ruiningly crazy, but I guess I wouldn't care that much if she was otherwise a sane and decent person. Or maybe I would care, I'm not usually blindly optimistic.
I think there is a natural expectation for a man to be more mature and responsible than the woman however, so I don't think the gender-flipped scenario would be equal in it's result.
Like I said though, there's little to no chance I'll ever talk to a girl IRL, let alone have one in my room, so even if my room is something I'm insecure about, it doesn't make the slightest bit of difference in the end. I'd rather keep all of my autistic/childish stuff than get rid of it all just to not appear like a manchild to someone that doesn't and may not ever exist.
No.84450
>>84335
thanks for the meme my man
No.84451
what's with the filter on the image? fag
No.84454
Thank you OP every time I fucking read what you wrote makes my life so much better!
Im so fucking glad I keep my spagetti in a tight seal and dont fucking end up looking pathetic like you.
Truly OP has sacraficed himself to make all other robots sins repented! Thank you, your miserableness failure has given me happiness ever fucking time I read your text.
Thank you OP. You saved many anons from depression.
No.84469
>>84346
Well, obviously the gender flip isn't exactly equivalent because Women aren't human.
Joking aside, it's still weird to be sitting on a bench (just roll with me here) and see some /cgl/ looking bitch decked out in full Sweet Lolita who isn't like 10 at the oldest.
But you're right, I can't really think of anything that'd be the equivalent to "creepy" anime figures except maybe pretty boy anime figures or being obsessed with 2D boys.
I take it you don't exactly live in an area of good foot traffic? Chances are then that it isn't even really you're fault that you aren't meeting people. If you're in anything less dense than a city block it's pretty fucking hard to find a place to hang, let alone not have to spend an assload of money at.
A person's room is likely where most of their time is spent, and yeah it is a natural extension of yourself, I'm sure if we saw each others rooms, what was in them, and how everything was arranged we'd get a good feel for the kind of person we both are.
But it's like you said with girls, they don't give this kind of thought to their rooms unless they're completely batshit.
Also talking to you has made me remember I have actually had a girl in my room before.
It was seriously uneventful. I had only invited her there because the area we live in has fuckall to do and my room has a bunch of stuff we could do to hang out.
I even have a minifridge and a coffee table in here, shit's pretty cash actually all that's missing is a couch
And my room is pretty equally decked out with stupid shit and is pretty ugly so I think it's safe to say you can trust me.
No.84479
LINK HER THIS THREAD
LINK HER THIS THREAD
LINK HER THIS THREAD
LINK HER THIS THREAD
LINK HER THIS THREAD
you already fucked it, you stepped on the water pool and splashed all your clothes
might as well shove your whole leg in and see what happens.
No.84484
>>84469
>I take it you don't exactly live in an area of good foot traffic?
Yeah it's pretty dead around here, besides school kids walking past on their way to and from the nearby schools. There's usually nobody else around besides a handful of people out jogging or walking their dogs in the middle of the day, it's all just houses around here. I'd have to really go out of my way to reach a cafe or a bar or something, and I can't drive nor do I have any friends, so I've never done anything like that in my life.
I've never really thought about this before, is that where all these "just go to a bar" posters who meet girls all the time live? In the middle of bustling cities?
No.84485
>>84484
Maybe, it's just as likely they live in the same area as you and I though since around places like that Bars are the only place you can really "meet" people.
Not like the people you'd meet there are worth your time anyway though, I've been and was even open minded about it, but it's just as shallow as you're probably thinking it is.
No.84551
>>84479
Don't. We don't need our /r9k/ getting infested with females and normies like r9keked on 4cuck did.
>they censor the word cuck
No.84565
>>84551
>we don't need our /r9k/ getting infested with females and normies
open your eyes anon.
they've infiltrated this place long ago
No.84576
>>83529
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
Fucking hell.
No.84596
>>84565
Yea maybe so but at least they haven't baned woman hate threads and censor the word cuck to appeal to them
No.84597
>>84596
Sorry, we. We haven't done that I meant to say, but they have. Shit phrasing skills
No.85278
>>83529
So what's the state of things with Laura atm OP?
No.86215
REV UP THAT HOT COCOA, CAUSE I AM SURE READY FOR SOME BROWNIES
No.86295
>Texting this faggot beta who I hang around with occasionally
>did something nice so I told him he "earned a few brownie points."
>My fucking face when "Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot cocoa."
No.86441
>>83529
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot cocoa!
Just accept it anon
No.86452
>>84032
>Rule #2: if you don't have anything interesting to say, it's better not to say anything. AVOID SPAGHETTI.
>Shit chicks don't care about: your boring ass life, Dungeons & Dragons, your autism, your gay job, your dorky friends, anime, your waifu, your stupid hobbies like comic books
Yeah, but you realize that this just translates as: robots aren't interesting and they have no hope right?
We have nothing interesting to say, because all we know about are all those things girls hate, so we'd never say anything, which is also not interesting.
Girls want you to talk about interesting shit, and be interesting, but if you are not interesting then YOU ARE FUCKED, and there are no super secret special PUA tricks that will change that.
Genetically inferior sclubs were raised wrong are all fucked up and will never be right ever.
Instead of giving dating advice, robots should take advice for how to cope with permanent incel, because that is realistically what they will always suffer from.
My advice to OP is: don't bother EVER. Leave women alone and just wait patiently for waifubots to start existing (save up motherfucker). Doing anything else will only create heartbreak and suffering.
The best way to live is to lower your expectations right down to their lowest level and let life surprise you.
No.86453
>>84049
>Tell her a joke. Tell her a funny story. Sound like an intelligent man, but not a fucking dweeb.
Basically, win the genetic lottery and be born with wit and a razor sharp social brain. Good advice!
If he was smart or funny that would come naturally and he wouldn't have given /r9k/ a new banner.
There is no hope ever. Trash is trash. If you start believing you can never not be trash, you'll actually be happier anyway, because you won't get your hopes up.
No.86457
>>84055
>Rule #5: talk to her like she's yours already. Don't be afraid of her. Make sexual innuendo and be clever about it. Double entendre. Makes bitches moist that you want to cum balls deep in her but are clever and don't sound like a rapist.
See. This only works if you are a hot guy (don't misinterpret "hot"; what women find hot as a group is completely unknowable and they are interested in hiding it and spreading misinfo).
It doesn't work if you are a weirdo. It just makes you seem creepy and gives more ammo to feminists. Basically the thing they are complaining about deep down is when genetically inferior men try to go above their station. That's where cringe comes from and they call it harassment, because its like a dirty peasant hanging off the capes of the lord and lady of the manor and begging. It's pathetic because it's a lie against nature.
PUA, and dating advice in general doesn't work, because all the people who have had success can't know all the inherent subtle characteristics that make them attractive to women, and they jump on this system as the explanation.
Basically PUA is a small group of men who don't know why women find them innately hot, thinking its some special code they can teach to a great mass of inherently inferior schlobs, who using the exact same techniques lack those innate subtle inscrutable characteristics and so come off as creeps, dweebs, and harassers.
The damned are damned. Happy men are those who accept their damnation. Those who try to rise from hell are doomed to fall back there, because no one worth a damn would be there in the first place.
No.86475
!aococ eht ot txen thgir seinworb esoht tup ll'I !eeey wwwwA
No.86481
>>83529
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
No.86482
toasting in legendary bread
No.86490
>>86482
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
You dun fucked up, OP
No.86533
>>83722
Finally, something to keep me on 8ch. Thank you, anon.
No.88065
just dropping by to Awww yeeee
and uh
put these brownies by the hot cocoa.
No.88082
OP is giving me so much cringe that if I don't control my breathing I'm going to have an anxiety attack.
No.88167
>>84170
Awwww yeee this thread just keeps getting better and better (or worse and worse, depending if you're OP or not).
No.88170
Im here to say that today is a cold morning and hot cocoa and brownies sounds comfy as fuck. Thanks for the idea, OP.
Awwww yeee
No.88919
The brownies.
Please. Put them next to the cocoa.
I thank you, anon.
AWWW YEEEE
W
W
W
Y
E
E
E
E
No.88926
>>84170
It's the thread that keeps on giving
No.88928
aww yeeeee
put those brownies right next to the hot cocoa chocolate
No.88929
AWWWW YEEE! I'll put that cranberry sauce right next to the stuffing!
No.88949
>>83529
K.. KEEP ME POSTED
No.89163
>she gives you brownies
>awwww yeaa
>you put them next to some hot cocoa of unknown origin
stop playing with the grill' feels, chad
No.89844
One does not simply put, brownies, next to the chalice of cocoa.
No.89864
Mods pls sticky this legendary thread
No.89868
>>83529
COME BACK AND TELL US HOW THE STORY PROCEEDED YOU WORTHLESS FUCKTARD
No.89877
>implying that after the awww yeee reply and the text invitation (to an action movie even) there is something that can proceed
not all hope is lost but OP is currently at square -2 with crows pecking at his brownies and a monkey sticking its finger in the hot cocoa
No.89899
BROWNIE WING COCOA SQUADS
No.89910
>>89877
>and the text invitation
What's wrong with that? How do you want to invite someone that you do not see in daily life otherwise?
ok OP is a little bitch since he couldhave asked when they met at work, but the approach was ok.
No.89911
AW YEEE, I'LL PUT THOSE NEGATIVE STATUSES NEXT TO HIGH HP
No.89917
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies right next to the hot cocoa!
Just give up.
No.90220
BUMP LEST WE FORGET: Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies right next to the hot cocoa!
No.90322
TELL ME ABOUT BROWNIES
WHY DOES HE DRINK THE COCOA?
No.90324
There is a reason prostitution is the oldest profession.
Negotiating for sex with charisma is inefficient, and our ancestors knew that exchange apples for vagina is the only way to go.
No.90352
this board was created to make it so board related memes wouldnt be a thing on here. but I really hope this maymay never dies.
No.90449
>>90352
>this board was created to make it so board related memes wouldnt be a thing on here
nigga this board was made for fresh meemees
OC real shit
No.90459
>>83529
OP types paragraphs
she gives generic responses
kek
No.90462
>>86453
Finally some good advice.
Fuck's shake I am attractive, tall, with above average intelligence and even a sense of humor that can occationally appeal to normalfags and I haven't got laid for the last 4 years (and another 2 years before that) because of minor eccentricity and lack of income.
STOP FUCKING TRYING!
EMBRACE 2D AND EMBRACE DEATH WHEN IT FINALLY COMES TO YOU! IT DOESN'T GET ANY BETTER!
No.90690
No.90693
>>90322
IT WOULD BE EXTREMELY TASTY
No.90837
>>90462
>haven't got laid for the last 4 years
>had sex 4 years ago
GET
OUT
No.91001
>>84335
TELL US WHAT HAPPENED AFTERWARDS YOU RETARDED FAGGOT GOD FUCKING DAMMIT
No.91003
>YYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
OP will live with this shame for the rest of his days
No.91006
>>90693
You're a big friend
No.91010
>>84130
>hey you wanna meet tomorrow pt 2
No.91171
No.91205
aww yee
i just came to make my daily post here
yee
No.91436
Awwww yeee!
somebody needs to track down OP, and kill him for being such a faggot
No.91442
>>91001
This. I need to know what happened next
No.91455
>putting shitty instagram filters on a screenshot of a text conversation
Why?
No.91560
>>83543
Fuck I lold. How did you think that was acceptable op? To the point where you weren't even embarrassed to share it on the internet?
No.91574
>>84335
Awww yeee!
I'll put this whine next to the cheese!
No.91798
REV UP THAT COCOA, CAUSE I'M REALLY BROWNIES
No.91825
>>90837
Holy fucking shit, dude! It's not wizardchan. For all practical purposes I'm as virgin as the average robot.
No.92188
No.92268
>>91825
YOU HAVE TO GO BACK, CHAD. YOU HAVE TO GO BACK
No.92320
>>83529
Holy shit OP, you're the biggest faggot I've ever seen. You even make me and the guy who baneposted to a girl look good. And don't think I didn't see what you did there. You really deserve to die alone.
No.92321
>>84170
My sides have gone nuclear.
No.92720
No.92725
seems a pretty normal conversation, to me.
No.92729
No.92731
let's hear from the interesting man
No.92742
AI to the resc… never mind
No.92758
How the fuck can you get a girls number and I can't? Even if it's your coworker.
No.92816
I put my brownies right next to the hot cocoa before I breathe in.
No.92868
OTOH OP is on to something
No.92906
No.92908
she talked to you like a child
No.92914
No.92919
>>92906
>is britbong
>doesn't pronounce 007 as "double oh seven"
Pretty impressive lack of pop culture knowledge m8, you must be a hardcore hikki.
No.92923
>>92919
>implying it's still Bond
No.92927
>>92919
He sounds Irish to me, so it would make sense for him to not be close with the English pop culture.
No.92931
>>92927
He's not Irish, he's an English northerner. He's from Newcastle or somewhere nearby.
No.92932
>>92927
>He sounds Irish to me
No, I'm from England, but pretty weird because my surname is Irish. Do we know each other?
>not be close with the English pop culture
I'm a reasonably big fan of Bond.
No.92939
>>92931
>>92932
Well I guess I'm just an idiot. Sorry about the mistake.
No.92942
>>92939
No. You guessed my Hiberno ancestry so maybe you are a super-detective and all you need to hear is the voice to tell loads of stuff about someone.
You need to awaken to your true power.
No.92990
Send this exact text if you want to get laid with any white girl:
"We must secure the existence of our people and a future for white children"
And NEVER BE NICE, you don't have to be a dick, but NEVER BE NICE!
No.92994
>>92942
Oh yeah, that's what it was, I just didn't want my cover to be blown. Too late!
No.93037
> "We must secure the existence of our brownies and a future for hot cocoa"
agree 100%
No.93046
>>93037
14/88 WE MUST SECURE THE EXISTENCE OF OUR BROWNIES AND A FUTURE FOR HOT COCOA
HEIL HERSHEYS
No.93095
>>90462
>a sense of humor that can appeal to normalfags
>fucks shake
OP you really need to stop with the dessert puns. Go and disable your pinterest account already you fat fuck.
No.93176
> looks like someone did not secure brownies
No.93179
Even without opening the image, I can see you are talking way too much. She should be talking more than you. You come off as too eager otherwise.
After opening, you're way too excited and happy. Too many exclamation marks, too many happy phrases. Like a puppy or a little kid; neither of which are things girls want to fuck (well maybe some girls, but I digress). Don't be sad either though obviously, just cocky and funny.
No.93195
>>93176
>2 watermarks
When did imageboards go so wrong that no one can even slap text on an image without using some shitty meme site?
No.93284
>>93195
here, hope u like the png
No.93311
i like to visit this thread like once a week to remind myself that even though i've made some shitty lines in my day, none were as bad as AWWWW YEEEE
No.93874
No.93952
AWWWW YEEEE
Did OP kill himself?
No.93987
>>93311
Post yfw no matter how bad you fuck up you will never be OP.
Fells tops man.
No.93995
I met OP and kept him up to date about the thread, pic related.
No.93996
>>93987
I dunno, I envy him a lil'
> tfw no qt ever said to me "God bless your soul"
> one said "you wanna fuck", but it doesn't feel the same.
No.93998
>>83529
you should just stop talking to this bitch, it an't going to happen and she will just make you feel like shit
No.94003
>>93952
na, hes just taking a long time putting those brownies right next to the hot cocoa.
No.94026
>>86448
Shut it down. The goyim know.
No.94032
so whats the problem here
I don't see what the problem is here
No.94053
>>83529
Will you ever give us an update?
No.94064
>>83529
I've seen this before on the other /r9k/. It still hurts.
No.94078
ANY OF YOU GUYS WANNA GET PIZZA HUT?
No.94089
>>84170
Dankest meme man. Saved 4 gr8 meme times.
Thanks for the OC anon
No.94117
>>94078
YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE TO PUT IT NEXT TO THE HOT CHOCOLATE
IT'S ABSOLUTELY BRILLANT
No.94364
AWWWW YEEEE, I'M NOT GONNA LET OP FORGET THIS BY LETTING THIS THREAD DIE
No.94395
>>83529
hah
Pretty sure I've seen that snap somewhere else in teh internetz
OP is a fag
No.94742
>>94395
at this point of the thread, OP is irrelevant, hot cocoa and brownies have a life on their own.
>>94117
awwwww yeeeeeee
No.95157
This needs to be permanently stickyed as a monument to autism and betaness
No.95174
>>83529
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
Thank you for making me laugh for the first time in a long time at something on /r9k/
>>84170
Well done, saved
No.95925
>>95157
this
pls do it, stick it so the legend never dies
No.96046
>>91825
>had sex
I don't think so.
No.96047
File: 1450881061761.jpg (23.88 KB, 600x338, 300:169, 85676cc5941043fd00bca11778….jpg)
>>92742
fucking normies ruining everything
u
c
k
i
n
g
n
o
r
m
i
e
s
r
u
i
n
i
n
g
e
v
e
r
y
t
h
i
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DUDE MEMES HAHA
No.98093
how much thread will be trimmed due to migration? had OP instagrammed the screenshot because it was copypasted from halfchan? is the Original OP dead, drowned in a pool full of hot cocoa?
WE NEED TO KNOW DAMMIT
No.98370
you goddamn abnormies
filling my head with abnormie memes
i can't even buy groceries anymore
filename.jpng
No.98376
merry cocoa and a brownie new year!
No.98381
>>83944
pretty bad but i don't see anyone else making a screen cap
No.98384
>>98370
holy shit those look good
No.98623
No.98754
>>84193
Your request is fulfilled in bleeding edge apng meme technology.
No.98790
>>98093
Original OP has finally tied the noose after becoming a laughing stock even on a board filled with permavirgin losers.
No.98800
bringing some brownies and hot cocoa into the new year! aww yeeeee!
No.98994
>>84200
Femanons truly are the greatest trolls.
>you will never meet a female anon in real life
Fuck.
No.99073
>>98381
I tried my hand at it, the more caps the better though.
No.99086
>>99073
>I was included in a screencap
It's an honor
No.99089
>>99086
And >>98381 too, wow. I've made it.
No.99408
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
>Be OP
>Life is depressing and lonely, as it has been for years
>Turn to r9k, my only comrades in this brutal world
>Share this autistic bit of my struggle
>Even r9k laughs at me
>They make memes
>They bump the thread to prevent it from dying
>They even tell me to kill myself
>Every time I go to the catalog I am greeted by my past mistake
>Eventually stop browsing r9k
>Spend hours each day crying over the fact that I'll never get laid
>Don't even show myself in public anymore over fear of embarrassing myself once more
>Last time I did anything eventful was when I went to see the Spectre, the new 007 film
>Now I spend each passing day holed up in my dark room
>My only source of happiness are the brownie and hot cocoa supplies which I am quickly depleting
>The brownies, hot cocoa, and feels are the only loyal entities in my life
No.99474
>>99073
noice
and there has been some fallout in other threads/boards too.
merry brownies and happy new cocoa
No.101032
>>94089
>be me
>someone linked this bread to /tv/
>laugh at OP
>laugh at some good OC
>find this shit
>50% robot selfpity crap
>50% poltard
>1000% austismus
>suddenly remember why I never come to this shit board
No.101038
>>92725
>>92731
>>92736
What if eventually these memes make it to the mainstream and OP best-friend-forever-but-never-gf sees them and finds the screencap?
No.101586
AWW YEEE I'LL BUMP THESE MEMES RIGHT NEXT TO THE STICKY
No.101606
I'm saging this shit hard.
If you think this is OP you are a normalfag.
Get out.
No.101655
>>83529
This is why I'm glad I'm omega and not beta. OP an orbiter cuck
No.101656
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot coacoa!
Well done.
No.101669
> brownies
> hot cocoa
> Awwww Yeeee.
Mah fuckn sides won't stop they wanderin.
No.101670
>>101669
>>99073
Also, mfw I miss the only threadcap I've ever seen happen live.
No.102019
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot cocoa!
God-fucking-dammit OP
No.102042
>>99073
Neat, im there twice.
God bless.
No.102075
>>101606
Why post at all then? Do you think this is a Reddit downvote?
No.102089
>tfw now spend hours a day looking for brownies at hot cocoa to put next to each other
This meme is too strong.
No.102188
Just a tip you fucking betafag, dont ask girls out, tell them that they are going with you. Instead of saying that we should go out to movie x, say "seeing movie x with you on the weekend would be nice" or some other way, that way you come off more confident and alpha. Godspeed, OP. Godspeed.
No.102207
No.102235
Quit trying to be friends with women. It will absolutely destroy any chance you have with them.
No.102271
>>102188
>txt potential gf
>put brownie points she didn't yet award me next to the hot cocoa
>potential gf impressed
HEY IT WORKS
No.102272
No.102287
>It's STILL up
brings a warm fuzzy feelin to my heart to see this thread.
No.102321
>>102204
>muh right-winger ebin-youtube personality x——-D
>>>/pol/
No.102466
>>86452
That whole point was wrong. Girls also have varying perceptions of what's interesting, and believe it or not, some actually do like animoose and vidya. I know it sounds generic, but just beeee urself. You can't be normie, so you have the choice of being either boring or eccentric. Why not go with the latter? Life's too short to censor yourself.
It worked for me. Keeping a relationship alive is the hard part though…
No.102642
So did you get the gal OP ?
No.102679
>>102678
The Case of the Brownies and the Hot Cocoa: Act II
No.102713
No.102740
>>102713
>OP killed himself
source?
No.102751
>>102678
>>102679
Fucking fantastic. And made in GIMP in apng format, too!
No.102758
>>83529
You seem like such a nice guy pal. I'm sure she is secretly into you. Just be yourself xD
No.102782
>>102679
>>102678
Awwww yeee.
>yfw you're not OP right now.
No.102801
>>102678
>>102679
Brownies next to the hot cocoa/10
No.102826
>>102678
That must have taken quite a bit of work to do in GIMP. Thanks for the OC.>>102678
>>102679
No.102878
>>102679
>>102678
good shit my man
No.102883
>>102878
He looks like a prettier lady than her.
No.102916
>>83529
>I'm never going to get laid.
Not if you sound like a faggot over texts
No.102945
This thread is killing me, I was feeling like shit before but damn I'm laughing myself stupid.
No.104001
>>83529
>Awwww yeee! I'll put those brownies next to the hot cocoa!
my sides
No.104943
>he put those brownies right next to the hot cocoa
AWWWW YEEE!
No.105076
No.105077
i wonder if OP has killed himself by now, this thread has been up for almost 7 months now, every time he opens /r9k/ he is reminded of how much of a fuck up he is at life.
No.105100
>>105077
>7 months
>eurofag detected
No.105273
>>99408
This will go down in the annuls of /r9k/ history.
No.105293
>>105100
my mistake, it was just 3 months
No.105364
i bet when OP posted this he didnt think it would last for 3 god damn months
aw yee
No.105377
>>105364
Someone should repost it when the thread dies. And again after the next thread dies.
He shall never live this down. His shame shall be forever.
No.105394
>>84032
>Shit chicks don't care about: your boring ass life, Dungeons & Dragons, your autism, your gay job, your dorky friends, anime, your waifu, your stupid hobbies like comic books
Why even meet such chicks when you can go to convetions and meet nerd girls? I think it makes things easier when you can just be urself.
No.105463
Don't think we're going to let this thread die, OP.
No.105535
you really did it with this one buddy
No.105566
No.106293
No.106298
>>106293
Poor OP.
He knows he screwed by a long shot, and he constantly checks the catalog.
A year in his eye as he sees it with only 5-10 threads before it's gone forever (apart from the 6 million archives).
But then, by some awful surprise, someone brings it to the top again. And he returns to his self-loathing, catalog-refreshing misery.
No.106430
THOSE BROWNIES OP
WE TOLD YOU
WE TOLD YOU ABOUT THE BROWNIES!
No.106880
File: 1454601854410.jpg (70.39 KB, 620x419, 620:419, Lauras vagina when she rea….jpg)
>This needs to be stickied as a memorial to hot cocoa and brownies
No.106898
>>106880
BO didn't sticky it when it was relevant and the joke's already getting pretty old, little chance of it happening now. I have to wonder if this would have blown up the way it did if I didn't point the infamous line out immediately.
No.106910
You idiots realize that this is a repost right? This shit was on half-chan
No.106988
>>106910
Reposted to cuckchan, according to the dates
https://desustorage.org/r9k/thread/24074112/
Unless there is an earlier thread. I couldn't be bothered to dig much further.
No.107000
>>106898
Mod can sticky it once it reaches the bump limit.
No.107023
STILL THE CHAMP BBY
/ints/ ALWAYS WINS
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
*btw im 17 lol
No.107336
>>106910
> muh cuckchan repost
You clearly didn't get the scriptures.
"the screenshot fell among shitposts, which grew up and choked the catalog, so that they did not bear meme. 8 Still other post fell on good chan. It came up, grew and produced a meme, some multiplying thirty, some sixty, some a hundred replies.”
“Whoever has ears to hear, let them hear.”
No.107344
>>84178
No shame in escorts, man
No.107372
>>106988
>cuckchanner crossposting cancer reposts our dank meme to his shitty site
Thank FUCK it didn't take off over there. If 4cuck took credit for our dank meme I'd be fucking livid. Whoever crossposted this to halfchan needs to kill himself immediately.
No.109721
What's this all about then? A dank new meme?
No.110416
AWWW YEEEER
Where is the follow up OP
No.110433
>>106988
>cuckchan stealing our meme
disgusting cuck faggots
No.110439
No.112520
wew lads
still this shit is lit
/awwyeeegenerals/ when?
No.112571
awww yee
>yfw this thread was posted 4 months ago
No.112575
WHEN IS OP GOING TO BE SUCH A FUCKING FAGGOT AND POST A FUCKING UPDATE FOR FUCK'S SAKE
No.112815
>>106298
I wish to refresh his misery once more.
No.113855
> how to shoot
> this is not a magazine full of bullets
> this is a bag full of brownies
> that is not a target
> that is a steaming cup of hot cocoa
> you got to put the brownies right next to the hot cocoa
> you got to put the brownies right next to the hot cocoa
> now stop breathing and let out an imperceptible AWWW YEEEEE while you gently squeeze the trigger
> the rifle will shoot almost by itself
THANK YOU OP NOW I HAVE A REAL CUP FOR MY HOT COCOA
No.113917
>>113855
THIS IS NOT MY BEAUTIFUL HOUSE
THIS IS NOT MY BEAUTIFUL WIFE
No.113932
>>113855
>now stop breathing and let out an imperceptible AWWW YEEEEE
No.113951
>>90462
>I haven't got laid for the last 4 years (and another 2 years before that)
So six years then?
No.115525
No.116530
No.116555
No.116588
>>116555 (checked)
It is now
No.116780
ahaha them brownies am i right?