It's Sunday night, I am in a relationship with a woman who thinks I don't care about her, I am overstressed from school again, I am due to fail my Physics 1 test tomorrow, my social life is falling apart, and the only thing that has kept me sane is my writ

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Anonymous 09/29/14 (Mon) 05:04:32 ea5f47 No.52

It's Sunday night, I am in a relationship with a woman who thinks I don't care about her, I am overstressed from school again, I am due to fail my Physics 1 test tomorrow, my social life is falling apart, and the only thing that has kept me sane is my writing. I have never been officially diagnosed, but I have been chronically sad (and what I assume is depressed) for the past four years or so. I just wanted to get that out there.

Anonymous 09/30/14 (Tue) 05:25:38 ea5f47 No.53

File: 1412054738739.jpg (132.13 KB, 645x773, 645:773, image.jpg)

OP here. Just wanted to update how the day went. Failed the test, had a shitty day at home, and my gf told me that her ex had a bigger dick and that is the only one other than mine she's worked with and has a hard time with me. Guess some people can't win. :/

Anonymous 09/30/14 (Tue) 05:26:25 ea5f47 No.54

>>53
Has a hard time doing things with my dick.*

Anonymous 09/30/14 (Tue) 08:22:40 7f0d5f No.58

I'm sorry to hear that, OP. Why does your girl think you don't care about her? I know it's an awful feeling to fail tests, but do keep in mind that it is not the full grade. What do you right by the way? Poems, short stories, etc?

Why did she make that comment about your did? Was it meant to be an insult during a fight or was it an off-handed remark that she didn't realize was really rude? Have you talked to her about how that came across to you?

And yes, you do sound depressed; I don't think there's much one could argue against that. Have you been or at least considered going to see a councilor/therapist?

Anonymous 09/30/14 (Tue) 22:07:05 ea5f47 No.61

>>58
She thinks that because for two days in a row I didn't talk to her(it was because I was busy and she was pissed at me). I write poetry a few times a week. She made that comment because she was awkwardly giving a handjob and I tried to help her out and she said she wasn't used to one of my size, she then told me that her ex had a bigger one, I don't think it was meant to be mean but it sure hurt. I don't actively seek help because I'm too embarrassed of how I feel and I'm very nervous around new people.

Anonymous 10/02/14 (Thu) 01:32:59 7f0d5f No.65

>>61
>She thinks that because for two days in a row I didn't talk to her(it was because I was busy and she was pissed at me).
Did you explain to her that you were busy and not just neglecting her for no reason?

>She made that comment because she was awkwardly giving a handjob and I tried to help her out and she said she wasn't used to one of my size, she then told me that her ex had a bigger one, I don't think it was meant to be mean but it sure hurt.
Did you talk to her about that comment though? I'm sure if you told her that, she'd realize how insensitive it was; chicks have their own insecurities too and I'm sure she would understand.

>I don't actively seek help because I'm too embarrassed of how I feel and I'm very nervous around new people.
I'd really encourage you to go and try, man. I know it's hard, but I can pretty much guarantee you that if you go, you'll be happy that you did. I know everyone says that you "just have to push through and do it", but it really isn't the worst advice here. The longer that you don't do anything about it, the worse it will become; and you don't want to look back in ten years and ask "why didn't I go talk to someone?"

Anonymous 10/02/14 (Thu) 02:24:51 ea5f47 No.66

>>65
I told her about it, she understood the first day, but on the day she was upset at me she just got more mad at me. I think she has simmered down though.

After I tried talking to her about it, all she did was say that she said it to me as a response to me asking her if it was small. She claims it isn't but she did say that her ex had a larger one, which I don't think was really necessary.

I know I should seek help. I have been debating it much more recently than ever before, mainly because the last few weeks have been extremely difficult for me.

Anonymous 09/12/15 (Sat) 05:15:58 cc3712 No.1070

I'm going to post in this thread because it's about to fall off and I'm so ashamed of myself that I'd rather not draw attention to my story in any way, but at the same time I have to post something or else I might lose it. The long and the short of it is I just lost a SO of three years that I had every intention of marrying this Tuesday. Maybe Monday. I can't remember. She'd had a lot of different problems over the course of time. Shitty doctors prescribing the wrong medication for problems that they either only imagined existed or existed because of the wrongful medication, an abusive ex-bf, a family history plagued with suicide and alcoholism and a whole mess of things. I tried my best to be supportive and do good things and be a shining light in her life. But over the past 9 months or so, I started to notice a definitive pattern where my personal interests would invariably get shoved off to the side, even during times when there was nothing particularly emotionally pressing. Now, I'm pretty simple. All I really wanted to do was play video games with her and watch some anime. Not a tall request, but every single time I'd get shut down. This, combined with the fact that she seemed to not be improving much or at all despite my encouragement and good deeds, started to sink me into a mental slump myself, which I guess at this point has evolved into full-blown depression. All I do is play FFXIV, go to classes, eat, and sleep. I don't produce any content that makes for interesting conversation, and now I don't know what it's like to do the things I used to do. I know I did them but it's like there an invisible something that prevents me from doing them. So she left me, on the grounds that we were only hurting each other. It really hurts. I spent three years, a large amount of mental, social, and financial effort to keep this woman happy and healthy, and now I'm gone because I can't handle my own problems, much less hers. I'm not going to pull the "women are evil manipulators" card because I understand that at this point in time I'm pure dead weight and anybody in a personal relationship with me would want to be free of it. I just want this dead feeling inside me to leave. I want to be free, to smile again. To have friends. To look forward to things. I want to do more than move from bed to desk to food over a 24 hour period. If you read this before the thread falls off, please don't bump it. I want my story to die and stay dead.