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File: 1430818760785.jpg (98.98 KB, 450x619, 450:619, 1367917180477.jpg)

bdfe3c No.609

Anyone here not over their breakup with their Boyfriend or Girlfriend?

It's been a few years since my exgf and I broke up.

I don't even think she acknowledges my existence anymore or would even attempt to.

This was in highschool. I became so depressed that I ended up dropping out of Highschool because I didn't want to be anywhere near her or anyone else really.

I'm 23 now.

The way she broke up with me was what killed me. It was like she just suddenly didn't care anymore. The tone in her voice said it all. And this was done over the phone, as sad and embarrassing as it sounds. And ever since then I've been in a rut.

We both had the same friends, but I ended up turning into a hermit and turned to video games and heavy computer usage. And it's been like that ever since.

Computers and video games served as a sort of escapism for me, but it's taken such a drastic and disgusting toll on me.

My speech is much worse than what it was. And my conversational skills took a hit too.

I'm very unfit though not overly obese (thank god)

I always try to tell myself "OK tomorrow I'll change my ways for sure" but my current way of life always drags me back down.

I keep a lot of how I feel to myself, but places like this give me some sort of an outlet to try and express myself the best I can.

I really want to change. I really do.

I know I'm disappointing my parents by becoming such a shit stain on society. But for some people, like me, it's hard to move forward alone.

aaad45 No.610

I'm too tired to post my shit right now, but you're not alone, OP. I'll be 23 later this year and I'm still fucked up after my girlfriend left me back in 2012.


6f4a2c No.614

I threw away my stuffed animals when I was 12.


bb71b9 No.631

File: 1431677535499.jpg (173.82 KB, 784x1024, 49:64, Jay-cutler-arms-training2-….jpg)

>>609

I know what your feeling bro, but its always better to get out of a relationship that wont work early on, mine was pretty shit too, i broke up with her but one week on i remember how much time she took up and how she may have been my only friend, but now i can find someone who loves what i love and will be there for me forever.

Go to /fit/ and begin anew the weights always helped me out during a bad break up think of how she will react if she sees you again and you made it, or even just got healthy again.


85186a No.712

File: 1433077258975.jpg (70.35 KB, 753x564, 251:188, 1419311928544-1.jpg)

>not over their breakup

yup.

My last girlfriend was everything I ever wanted. She challenged me, but also supported me. And I did the same to her. I met her when I lived in a sublet, we were both the odd ones out who didn't know anyone. But we clicked. Everyday I'd get home before her from work, sit on the couch and program. When she'd come home, normally a bit sweaty and suited up in her running gear. I'd look up, smile, and say: Welcome Home and she'd smile and ask me how my day was.

God I wish I could say Welcome home to her again holy shit I'm crying, damnit OP

In our last week of living together I took the plunge, kissing her in the kitchen and making love with her all night, and the rest of the week. Every night we drank our fill of each other for hours, laughing and making jokes during sex, taking nacho breaks inbetween sessions before diving back into each other.

At the end of the week she moved back to CA to goto school. But we kept in touch. I wrote her letters. Physical letters anon. We discussed tons of things, I poured myself onto the page. She used to never text at all, but she texted me everyday. We wrote small stories to each other, making them up to entertain each other. When christmas came she visited me and we had hot chocolate and shared each other's warmth. When new years came, she surprised me by taking a 9 hour bus ride just to visit me. When her spring vacation came I took a week off from work and flew to CA to spend time with her. For a week we made love, explored up and down the coast, and held each other each night.

Last summer she lived with me. We spent each day together. Waking up next to her I would roll over, her hushed breath murmoring good morning to me as she turned to face me. Our lips would meet and every morning I would tell her that I loved her. We never said I love you too like it was some automatic response. Everytime we said it, we looked straight into each others eyes and said I love you and meant it. Everyday was worth living because I had her to come home to, to talk to, to eat dinner out on the porch with and smile.

I loved her more than life itself.

Then the summer ended. Then she moved to Edinburough for a semester abroad. And our agreement ended. When we first started dating we had agreed that she couldn't do distance. She simply can't. She cannot communicate well over the ether and simply focuses only on those near her. So we had agreed to break up when she went abroad. We cried many nights leading up to it. Holding each other, saying that we didn't want to leave each other. The day that her father came to pick her up, and I helped her pack her things. Her father left us alone as he played tetris with the bags and on the small leftover mattress we layed down one last time together.

Have you ever felt a woman's tears falling onto your face? Have you ever kissed someone and wanted to hold that moment forever? To never let go? I comforted her. It was what had to be done, I had to be my woman's man. So I told her it was alright. I let some of my tears fall, but I made sure not to lose control. I hardened myself and was her rock and shoulder to cry on. When she left, and I had finished watching that car slowly fade out of site, I went inside and i sat. completely numb inside.

We've stayed in touch. I still write her letters, and she's lived in 2 other countries since then. I've visited her. And when I was in Germany we kissed in the black forest. My heart was on fire. The other weekend I visited her in portland and slept in her bed. Cuddling and holding her all night and well into the morning. But we're no longer dating.

She was perfect for me. In every way. But the distance is something she can't do. And I would never force her to love me again. She's moved on. Told me that since she's dated me (9 months ago was when we broke up) she's been the most emotional stable she's ever been. In some ways, I'm happy for her. Happy that I did what I could to make sure she wasn't dragged down by me as I fell farther and farther into depression. Happy that I kept up my bold face and continued writing her letters, mixing in the good and not letting her down. Happy that I can still see her.

But I'm broken anon. I am so broken inside. I can't love anymore. I've tried. I go on dating websites. I go out on dates. I talk to other girls. It doesn't do anything for me. Even when I meet someone nice, it just doesn't click and nothing happens. I had the opportunity to have amazing sex with a friend, but turned it down because I simply do not want anyone but her. I know the change in tone of voice OP. I know that feel. I know it too well. The one that says friend and not lover. And you hold on each time you hear it, hoping to hear that one slight inflection, that one note of affection.

But it doesn't come OP.

It doesn't come.


b16690 No.731

>>712

This is one of the most well written posts I've read in my life.


85186a No.734

>>731

Thanks anon.

I just wish I didn't have to feel that feel.


85186a No.735

File: 1433567107966.jpg (516.24 KB, 1271x625, 1271:625, WelcomeToSad.jpg)

>>731

capped it for you should you ever feel like trying to bring people to sad by advertising quality posts or something.


000000 No.736

>>609

It pretty much ruined my life.

I wasn't meant for this era. In any sane society we would have gotten married and had a family by now.


bc8955 No.738

>>736

Fucking this. I hate everything is just thrown away now if it's not some hedonistic or "It's about me" shit.


365693 No.742

File: 1433723477219.gif (141.63 KB, 300x300, 1:1, brrrrrrrnnnghhaa.gif)

>>712

Reading this made my heart feel really heavy anon. I wish I could say something but I feel at this point you'd find my cliche responses unhelpful (i.e the pic attatched).

Do you know if she's ever coming back? Have you kept these feelings a secret from her?

Once I held the flame for an ex-boyfriend once for 4 years even though I ended it. Not exactly admiting closure (because we remained very good friends) and everyone expected us to get back together, I secretly hoped it too. Total closure came though however, when he later came out to me! Cried hysterically upon finding this out but I got over it (dating someone new :D ) we've remained great friends ever since. I hope he finds someone nice someday too.


85186a No.743

File: 1433725070137.jpg (37.94 KB, 441x649, 441:649, imfine.jpg)

>>742

Eh, even a cliched response helps sometimes. The virtual hug is appreciated :3

Ever coming back? As far as dating goes I doubt it. I want her to, god knows I do. I'd take her in a heartbeat. And I know she still loves me too, enough that she checks in on me if I don't talk to her for a while, we still exchange letters but her's are always infrequent because, like I said, she's focused only on the people she can see, touch, and be near to. The only secrets I keep from her are how much I'm hurting. I've told her a little bit before, and when I visited her in Germany I cried, twice. Once on her bed while cuddling and giving her an update on how I was doing without her (a lot of things went wrong in my life in the past year, lot of family death, change of jobs, friends moving away, favorite restaurant closing where I had known all the staff and it was like Cheers, other heavier stuff). I cried on the trail in the Black Forest before we ended up kissing, looking out over Freiberg and talking with her while she hugged me and I cried and pic related a little.

I've been talking less and less to her though, mainly just because I don't want to be a burden on her since she's doing so well. I'm too negative and in a slump and don't want to lash out or be passive aggressive towards her. So I just try to remove myself from the equation. Love is putting others before you, letting the bird fly free as it were, even if it hurts.

Closure is hard to find. I can tell myself I did everything I could. I was the best boyfriend I could be. I was supportive, I was there when it counted, and that it was just not in the cards that life took her in a different direction than me. I sometimes wonder if I could rekindle the flame. Like the other week when I slept in her bed, I had thoughts about kissing her. We cuddled all morning and just talked anyway, so I feel like maybe there could have been a chance.

But then I thought to myself: She's still got another year of college, I've been out for a couple years and am establishing myself in my field. She'll likely end up doing volunteer/social work that will let her travel (she loves to travel) and bounce around short term, while I'm a bit more slow. Though I really really think I could support her throughout all that. Like uh… Julia Roberts and her Husband? Where they both did really different things but were happy and supported each other.

I'm glad you're dating someone new and I hope they're awesome :)


365693 No.744

File: 1433732045876.gif (737.84 KB, 320x240, 4:3, 1433222322920.gif)

>>743

No problem mate and thanks! But what you said there

> Love is putting others before you, letting the bird fly free as it were, even if it hurts.

I wish that I could do as you do, as hard as it is cause what you say is so true. I'm the sort of person who would open the cage-door because I know I have to but block the exit with my hands because I simply can't accept it. Your situation has prompted me to do a self-reflection because if the worst did happen today, I wouldn't be able to handle it at all. A lot of crap happened this year (uh upset and loneliness due to shitty flatmate), became very dependant on others solace but I hope to regain it again.

Continue to be respectful and considerate despite how you wish it were otherwise. Never malicious, beggy or forceful. I'm sure she appreciates this everytime you're together.

It would be a bit extreme to tell you to drop everything and follow her (you're clearly not a 2d rom-com protagonist chasing an equally 2d love), the fact that you're establishing your own independent life post relationship is very admirable too and you should continue to do so. Do as she is doing and don't let your slump stop you from chasing down what interests you. Easier said than done but it is a must anon. Have paitence and hope yes, but not so extreme that you're there just waiting and waiting and waiting for returned feelings…

Definately continue to keep in contact and support her dreams, and I hope that she does likewise for you. Doing this may rekindle something, but it shouldn't be an expectation/the sole purpose of your kindness, thats a sure fine way to piss you off when the feelings you expect don't happen.

From what I have read your current relationship is certainly not one-sided (e.g. you doing all the chasing) which is why I have hope for you two, that whatever your relationship (platonic or romantic) it will be a deep, genuine and fulfilling one that can last for years.

> MA-AHSIVE CLICHE INCOMING IN 5…4…3..

Who knows what the future will hold, there are many possiblities and I hope however it comes to be that you'll be in a good place. Don't let the tears in your eyes cloud your future anon! Being the affectionate optimistic noob I am, I would love you two to get back together. Though, I would also love it if you found someone new who coud mean just as much one day too!

Good luck and I hope this gif makes you smile!

[too much hope was used in this reply hahaha]


85186a No.755

YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.

>>744

>I'm the sort of person who would open the cage-door because I know I have to but block the exit with my hands because I simply can't accept it

I know how hard this can be anon. But it just hurts more if you hold on too tight. They can end up resenting you, and that hurts. And when you realize that it was your fault and if you had just backed off a little you could still have your friend still… well. Embed Related. It's cheesy I know, but the lyrics are pretty related.

>>744

>Your situation has prompted me to do a self-reflection

I'm glad! One of the best things about talking to people, and why I'm really happy this board exists, is that people can help spark new ways to think or ideas you might not have tried. It's a really great thing!

If I want her back, then I have to be worth her coming back. Is kind of how I think of it if I try to frame my feelings in the context of 'her'. But that's not really a good thing to do, you really do have to learn to be a little selfish and live for yourself sometimes. That's actually one of the lessons I learned from her. I think most people have at least one friend or have known a friend who's always going out of their way for people and doing things? That's kind of how I am, and more recently I've been trying to invest in myself a bit more on her advice. Reading, learning, going out to eat or to the movies by myself and being comfortable with it. It can be lonely sometimes, but pampering yourself can really life the spirits if you don't overdue it! I'm not always good at it, and i get down, but hey, I've got this board and the rest of 8ch to turn to when I need a laugh, smile, or a feel.

>Don't let the tears in your eyes cloud your future! sniff, dang this thread is dusty, I must have something in my eye. really though, your post made me smile and cheered me while bring a bit of liquid too. Thank you encouraging anon!

Good luck with your situation! I've had shit flatmates, my current one just stays in his room and is extremely awkward to talk to, so we just "coexist" rather than hang out. I'm moving soon though, so I'm thinking I'll try to find a more communal living space.


575994 No.759

I've been with my girlfriend for 2 and a half years now, and she's moving across the country for university in September.

We've talked about it and decided we're gonna break up, but I don't know how I'll manage when she's gone…


85186a No.777

>>759

>2.5 years

>distance breaking you two up

Anon. You can do this, you don't need to break up. I had a friend who's girlfriend went abroad and didn't have a phone to talk to him anymore with. So they used private twitter accounts to private message each other and keep up to date with their lives as it happened. don't ask me how she had no phone but could twitter… idk

They're still together today, 3 years later and happy as clams. You can do it anon. Be strong




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