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sick of ambivalence John Doe 01/03/16 (Sun) 02:11:48 fe7662 No.13270
i'll start deleting files on my computer, finish my notes, and set a time to go to the location where i plan to do my method, and then suddenly just be like 'nah'. how do i make myself feel like complete and utter shit during these times so that i don't keep going back and forth. i know deep down that i want it to be over, because i hate the times where i am not full swing suicidal, but survival instinct gets in the way.
John Doe 01/03/16 (Sun) 06:57:48 fe7662 No.13272
things i already do to make myself feel bad
>look at pics of beautiful people
>listen to lana del rey
>think about being transgender
>think about being a 5'7'' manlet
>think about having to work and study whole rest of life
John Doe 01/04/16 (Mon) 02:12:06 46faa7 No.13289
>>13270
Drink some alcohol and take benzos.
John Doe 01/04/16 (Mon) 14:56:01 3e3897 No.13295
>>13272
>>listen to lana del rey
>>think about being transgender
>>think about being a 5'7'' manlet
you're a walking talking meme, hope this motivates you :^)
John Doe 01/04/16 (Mon) 15:17:35 354b04 No.13296
eat nuffin
John Doe 01/06/16 (Wed) 07:41:38 ac73f4 No.13323
>>13296
Yeh, this works. Lack of food makes you an angsty bitch, and can make suicide seem a better option to being hungry, as stupid as it sounds.