Has anyone set themselves an ultimatum? I have been thinking of suicide for the past 8 years, it has consumed an enormous amount of time and caused me a lot of grief. Finally I have set myself an ultimatum, if I don't accomplish a certain goal in 1 month of time, I will end my life. After setting this ultimatum, I feel life has become a lot simpler, I don't worry anymore, I'm not afraid anymore, I either make it or die – no compromises. For the first time in many years, I feel my mind has become clear and sharp. People fear death only due to uncertainty, uncertainty of when and how it will occur, when the method and time is known, there is nothing to be afraid of, it is inevitable, no longer an abstract concept, death becomes real.
I have considered that I might not have the willpower to go through with it when the date comes, however, the only thing I fear more than the process of dying is disappointing myself yet again.
The name of peace is sweet, and the thing itself is beneficial, but there is a great difference between peace and servitude. Peace is freedom in tranquillity, servitude is the worst of all evils, to be resisted not only by war, but even by death.