bfbeb7 No.3897
serious question: What are you waiting for?
Have you not killed yourself yet because you don't really want to? Are you willing to give life another chance? Is a convenient method not currently available for you? Are you waiting for the purchase of a gun/pills/helium tank etc.? Do you not just want to see this board die? Are you new to this board and haven't really thought about it yet? Do you just want to spend your last living days here?
interested to know.
ede1e6 No.3899
Fear of pain and failure are what have prevented me thus far.
0e7340 No.3906
Killing myself at Christmas just seems wrong. I know, there's never a "right" time to do it, but damp, I ain't that mean.
My family would forever more associate Christmas with my death.
a3db50 No.3907
>>3906Same here bro, same here…
8ee82d No.3908
1.Get CO detector
2.Get a Grill with charcoal
3.Start test run and measure the concentration over a certain time.
4.If hopefully everything is going smoothly, I will put myself into the room.
Within ~3 months my money will run dry and I will be kicked out of university.
e8004b No.4131
Probably haven't lived half my life yet, might aswell try to make something out of it before outing myself
f5125c No.4151
>>3897I've tried a bunch of times a few years ago. Then my suicidal intentions went away. Now they are back. I guess I lost my motivation and decided to go with the flow. I'm really bad at killing myself. But I am planning on getting a firearm soon, now that I'm old enough. I can't fail with that.
I hope not.
c8e022 No.4165
>>3897I don't want to inflict the pain of my suicide on my family. All the same I've more or less disappeared from their lives partly because I want them to get used to me not being around… yet my cousin killed herself after doing that too and it still had a horrible effect on the family.
I guess my cousin is the lucky one. She got to kill herself before she knew what kind of effect it would have.
c0420c No.4398
>>3897I've made a couple attempts, both hanging. Both ended badly, goddamn panels on the ceiling caved. For some reason, I haven't tried since. Don't know why.
46c69d No.4402
>Is a convenient method not currently available for you?
Yeah, basically that. Im afraid as fuck of fucking up and pain too, not death itself.
d2a084 No.4418
>>4402That's a pretty common reason. It's one of mine, too. Been thinking and planning for a long time to make sure I don't fuck anything up.
5d54ec No.4420
For anyone who wants to see more answers - neckbeards discuss the intricacies of suicide (+2249 comments), posted 2 days ago
http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/2ratvx/serious_why_have_you_not_killed_yourself/Some of the answers reminded me how pathetic people are
> I want to finish all my video games
> want to watch the next season of Game of Thrones or the new Star Wars movie.
> I'm too lazy for it.
> It's a permanent solution to a temporary problemThis just motivates me to blow my brains out, wouldn't want to be assopoliceted with one of those detestable troglodytes.
46c69d No.4424
>> It's a permanent solution to a temporary problem
I hate that one so fucking much holy shit. It seems to me the vast majority of people are unable to see or imagine things from perspectives different to theirs. Yes of course its temporary when said people only contact with suicide related matters were their retarded teen friends wanting to off themselves because their gfs left them or college rejected their applications.
A whole life of misery, poverty and illness, a life in which you were dealt the worst cards before being born is not a temporary problem.
a6277e No.4536
>>3897im being held hostage to guilt and emotion, and cant bring myself to hurt the one person i do care about. but shes dying, anyways… sooo, wont be long.
68a3dc No.5026
>>3897I'm waiting for someone to clarify the feasibility of harvesting apple seeds for cyanide.
c088f4 No.5040
I'm waiting to get older. I plan to die someday by suicide, but I want to live for awhile first. I still have money to spend and places I want to see. I still haven't lived by the ocean. I also don't want either of my parents to outlive me. They really did try hard, and they weren't bad. They don't deserve to have to bury a son.
e84f1a No.5041
the main reason is because I believe in reincarnation and I'm almost positive that if i kill myself im going to be put into an even shittier life.
I feel like if I don't kill myself and suffer through a meaningless/distressing existance it will essentially pay off the large karmic debt I have inevitably accumulated through being a terrible person.
Realistically if i wasn't such a soft pussy i would have killed myself.
d0d7cc No.5045
Because I have three true friends in the world.
One won't be able to take my suicide and probably resort to it himself.
The other two won't be able to deal with being proven wrong about me.
I feel like I have a lot of things to say to the world. If anything more than anything else, to write a book about you all.
I want the world to know that people like us exist because they've made us in a way.
1ccad1 No.5051
The waifu age.
89f7a9 No.5648
Too lazy…
a229d4 No.5649
>>5041personal pain doesn't produce positive Karma man.
Just Saiyan
b44c13 No.5671
Because I dont want to kill myself. I'm trying really hard to find something that makes me want to hang on. I feel ashamed that I feel suicidal but I hate being alive so much. I hate living with so much mental anguish and feeling like this all the time. I hate being so able yet be so wasted on a life of poverty and negligence. I hate being born into a world where I am expected to spend the rest of my life caring for trivial pursuits and working somewhere I hate. Meanwhile people almost unanimously ignore me and all I want is to be someone's friend. I love being me, but I hate having to be me if that makes any sense. If I could be me but in a different life somehow I feel it would be infinitely better.
Granted I wouldn't want to hurt my family and the few friends I have but I dont know if that's what's really making me hold on. School I excel in yet it feels pointless. Poverty and poor circumstance tied me down before I ever got to know what it means to be free. And I spent my time alone searching for a way out, and only succeeded in making myself feel worse in the process. No one is free and that makes me feel even worse. I love the potential of the world and I hate seeing it wasted on greed and hatred towards each other.
4ae506 No.5689
>27
>Fucking garbage waste of life NEET
>Tried all my life to accomplish anything
>always fuck up everything
>have a 12 gage with buckshot
>haven't done it because I'm afraid I'd fuck up killing myself…
599725 No.5694
>>5689Jelly of you man
27 myself. Can't afford being NEET.
Can't afford a gun. Dunno if I can even get license for one
11e1e2 No.5695
>Schizotypal PD, which originates from home/family life growing up and the fact my mom's a psychotic schizophrenic cunt that should've never had kids.
>Paranoid fears of many things
>No family;despise all of them and never talk to them. I blame them for my disorder.
>No friends, not even online, and refuse to make any new ones for fear of inevitable betrayal.
>Do not fit in anywhere, with any group, club or organization, nor would anyone in any group want me to be there.
>Need to go back to school, but I have developed a fear of sitting in a classroom because of nothing but bad experiences in them my whole life
>Try to go online, most if not all are scams. The one that aren't somehow requires experience in the field in order to even be admitted for a fucking Bachelors degree
>Uni's now require fucking experience
>Even if I did somehow get admitted, I more than likely can't pay the tuition
>Probably can't get a loan due to the fact I dropped out of Uni and amassed $16k in debt, killing my credit score because I couldn't pay it due to 1.5 years as a NEET.
>Have very little money, about $600 and that's it
>Work part-time for $8/hr at a failing company that probably won't exist in 2 years
>Unable to try to find another job because of a summary offense that I can't get expunged until July 2016
>And of course need to pay $450 for that to even happen
>Stopped seeing therapist because I can't afford the co-pay
>Trying to stop seeing Psychiatrist because I despise the medications, have stopped taking nearly all of them months ago, and can't afford the co-pay.
>Not to mention the cost of the medications both right now and after I lose insurance.
>I can't afford the co-pay WITH insurance because the fuckers kept scheduling appointments too much
>In less than 2 years, the cost of those will skyrocket as I will lose insurance
>Completely convinced not a damn thing will get better, only worse
>Going to buy a rope for $5 and there's a perfect tree in my backyard
With all that being said, I have no idea why I haven't taken any action towards this ultimate goal. My moods change too much causing me to not go and buy the damn rope.
bfbeb7 No.5703
>>5671Yeah man my issue is my life up to this point has been boring, unrewarding, and empty. I've lived this long and nothing much has happened so far. So I doubt there's a lot in my future, a lot to live for, other than a 9-5 job and a shitty car and some house I gotta live in as a single man or perhaps 10 years down the line I'll be able to make enough money to find someone and settle down in a nicer house. But then so much of my life has been wasted on being alone and with nothing happening and no fun or good memories I just gotta wonder if that nicer house is going to be worth it.
yet at the same time, fuck, you're killing yourself. god fucking damn there's gotta be something better than that some better outcome and a way to live.
just don't know if i can find it in time.
bfbeb7 No.5705
>>5695fantastic fucking story but only the last sentence of your post answered my question so fuck you for making me read that
f3e26c No.5721
It's nice to know that no matter how bad things get I can get off the ride whenever I choose, and if it wasn't for that knowledge I'd have done it long ago.
b44c13 No.5723
>>5703I do not agree. I wrote the post, but I don't want just a menial reason to hang on. I want something substantial. Choosing not to live is a much softer tone than "killing yourself" and I feel it reflects my attitude much better.
I feel that I should have every right to desire more out of life and I should be able to choose to leave if life doesn't live up to my expectations. Which it hasn't.
And no, I don't mean unrealistic expectations either. Many basic requirements for happiness have been missing from my life for a long time and I'm tired of hoping something will remarkably change when all the conscious efforts I made to change the situation on my own have failed.
Why suffer more for an uncertain possibility of things getting marginally better? Or they could get worse as they usually do.
8dba17 No.5737
>>5723Don't worry Anon, I understand you.
"There is no doubt that life is given us, not to be enjoyed, but to be overcome — to be got over."
40b2f8 No.5762
I'm a Christian, and I'm afraid of going to hell over offing myself, plus I have no idea how my family would take it, plus the few friends I have.
b44c13 No.5789
>>5762I am legitimately curious then as to why you're a Christian in the first place? Dont people turn to religion for hope and guidance?
And not to spoil the surprise, but they'll be hurt and sad for a bit, probably a little truamatized (depending on method of suicide of course, I like to think inert gas strangulation is less truamatizing than a shotgun to the dome) but everyone gets over people's death eventually.
d878d7 No.5790
I'm gonna do it now, this is my last post.
8bb8b9 No.5794
I have no reliable method and yes I want to give things another shot. I give myself another 2 years max (24 now)
696b14 No.5796
I haven't done it yet because of a fear of botching it up (with the severe pain that follows). Well, and also because a tiny part of my ego says "Fuck everybody, keep on living just to spite them, fuck with people!" but that's not very fair to random strangers; everyone deserves a chance to fix themselves, no matter how fucked up or stupid or idiotic they are.
I cut myself off from my family. We've always had a deep seeded history of subtly lying, and I wanted to break the pattern.
Maybe that other part of me is waiting for someone to try and rob my store so I can feel justified in killing them.
de07f8 No.5804
I feel like I'm still better off then most people who want to commit suicide. Nothing convinces me more of that then coming to this side of the internet.
eb708d No.5822
Don't know enough yet and it'd crush some people. Don't want to leave a shitty wake behind me.
4cca8c No.5872
i dont live alone,im waiting for everyone but me to go to a place far away,enough to take them atleast 2 hours to return so i can have time to properly hang myself.
fcaaf7 No.5882
I'm that one handed wheelchair guy from few months ago.
Take a guess.
bb80b8 No.5897
Scared of the potential nothingness after death.
Life is shit, but I don't want to lose my good memories.
db3960 No.5958
Too many manga I wanna see finished. I'll kill myself when they're done.
b44c13 No.5968
>>5958Thats what they like to call "something to live for"…
b0ef75 No.5969
I'm double majoring in STEM and will never be at peace with myself until I know everything that I can know. I am in a never ending quest for knowledge.
e7a6f4 No.5985
>>5897>I don't want to lose my good memories.Then take photographs and write long journal entries about how you've lived etc. And then store those things away or make a time capsule and bury it somewhere so that maybe one day someone will find it and find your life interesting enough to share with the world. Having good memories really doesn't mean anything.
e0b6e4 No.5991
>>5958Berserk won't end, off we go!
cc7de8 No.6042
I haven't done it yet due to fear of failure and due to my family, can't stop thinking how they would react.
bfbeb7 No.6049
>>6042if they don't hate your guts then it'll kill them.
gotta decide if you love them so much that, knowing they are suffering in a world that will not exist to you, is going to be enough to stop you
it isnt for me to be honest.
f0b95e No.6064
It's too edgy. I'm serious. The implications of suicide in our culture contain way too much edge for my taste.
f0b95e No.6065
>>4424The most retarded thing about that sentence is that it ignores the impossibility of regretting your own suicide.
915c86 No.6145
>>3897For a long time, I was stuck in a grey area- not enough willpower to man up and fix my life, but too much of a pussy faggot to kill myself. That ends tonight.
61609a No.6146
Honestly It's kind of ironic. My depression is what's keeping me alive right now. I want to die, I despise life but I have no motivation to do anything. I have the noose ready and set up to go, but I just can't be arsed getting out the ladder. I'm lucky of I even get the motivation to eat, 99.9% of my time is just spent in bed on my phone listening to music because I have literally no motivation to even get up to piss anymore
592aef No.6150
I bought the cpap mask, tube, and by accident bought 4 helium tanks. I called my bank and there canceling three of them. I don't even know why I bothered. The mask and tube come Monday. Gives me enough time between then and when the tank comes for me to practice fitting it and securing it. So long people.
17007b No.6155
I have a friend, just one friend, who means more than anything to me. I've been a real cunt to her within the last month or so, and yesterday, she attempted to off herself because of the things I said. Its a miracle that she failed, because if she succeeded, I wouldn't be able to live with myself and I probably wouldn't be typing this right now XD. She's the only thing keeping me from ending it for good. I'm amazed she's still friends with me despite me making her attempt suicide. Woman has a heart of gold.
17007b No.6156
>>6150So long, m8. I hope you finally find peace.
8a8a3a No.6251
>>5026it would take nearly 500,000 apple seeds
bc1d42 No.6256
>>6150If you somehow failed and survive, please come back here and tell us. Wishing you all the best though.
804dd8 No.6464
My mother. She's had a hard, hard life, and I mean the world to her. She would not survive my death, especially at my own hands. I can't do that to her.
ef8ee1 No.6507
>>6464Make her life easier by just killing her yourself.
86f4e9 No.6518
>>5649Karma?
Karma is a childish belief that life is fair.
Oblivion.
b44c13 No.6521
>>6518Seriously.
when you see nice ass cripples and people stealing just to survive while the rich continue to be assholes you know that karma is just a big fucking lie.
bfbeb7 No.6551
>>6521>karma is just a big fucking lie.shit, i thought it was fact that being a good little boy directly correlates to the chances of nice and happy events happening to you
while being a grumpy meany pants means life will make itself tougher for you as it knows youre a rude little poo
really fucking opened my eyes up mate
804dd8 No.6555
>>6507I only hate myself, not the world or the people around. I don't think I could be a murderer.
Your life is your own, what you choose to do with it is your lot. I don't really believe anyone else has the right to choose what you do or don't do with your life, or has the right to take it from you (That right is your own.)
b44c13 No.6558
>>6551Really? Sarcasm? I wasn't validating karma, I was agreeing with the guy saying it wasn't a thing.
7faee0 No.6593
>>3906well, suicide rates skyroket around christmas anyway.
>>3897To answer your question, i've always seen suicide as an extremely selfish thing to do. i just can't do that to my sister
b98c63 No.6611
I dont have access to a convenient method.
I really want to do it, but my fear is that im too stupid. I think I fear what people will do afterward, but the great thing is if I do it right I wont have to deal with it anymore. I don't care about the pain, I just need the means and a plan.
f7b178 No.6612
Honestly I come to this board as a kind of self identification. It's comforting to know you're not alone, and when/if I get the balls to do it, I know where to come.
00545c No.6616
I'm not sure what's holding me back. I wish it would stop.
I don't wanna put up with this anymore.
59dd66 No.6625
I'm not waiting anymore. I'm going to down a nice quantity of sleeping pills with an even nicer quantity of alcohol and say my goodbyes.
800411 No.6628
>>3897I want to go… More than anything I really do. I've lost everything I've tried to build up in my life after years of abuse, but I live in the UK so there's no really good method I could use to make sure I'll die rather than just suffer in a hospital bed for the rest of my days. What can I do?
bfbeb7 No.6630
>>6628>I live in the UKdrive/take a train to the city and find some tall building you can jump off?
put your head on some train tracks?
jump off beachey head?
261062 No.6641
>>4131same , if i fail miserably at life like i think i will then so be it, but i want to experience life and just do whatever live the most of it because whatever happens i'll die whenever i choose to
001955 No.6652
>>3897I haven't killed myself yet because life is going pretty well for me. I'm generally happy every day and sometimes I feel genuine mirth/joy. I'm reaching a point of contentment that I never expected to attain, and I've surrounded myself with friends who know the real me with no bullshit and love and support me for who I am.
All in all, I can't see myself ever cutting this adventure short.
I hope you all have a great day though!
3aecd4 No.6716
>>4420>people find solace in silly little things of life>it becomes their reason to stay alive>x movie or x video game comes out>they find another one to look forward to>it pisses you off that people achieve happiness in manners you cannotYou're an emotionally empty bag of shit and an edgelord.
225d97 No.6724
>>3897Hoping adultlife will be better
Ive heard stories of it all those feelings dispersing once youre a it more grown.
That and i cant buy a gun yet.
592aef No.6726
dehydration takes a while. and it al depends on your enviroment. i just started working out today in hopes it would push me further over the edge
bfbeb7 No.6728
>>6726>dehydration takes a whiledon't tell me you people are trying to commit suicide through fucking dehydration
592aef No.6731
>>6728its been three days since ive had a drink of water…i feel very weak. i feel happy. so very soon
592aef No.6732
>>6728you know, in places where assisted suicide is legal like Oregon and Washington, people who are termanilly ill can choose to refuse liquids and foods. turns out its not a harsh way to die. you just need patience.
451cc8 No.6740
>>6726How long does dehydration take and what is it like? Would I need to be alone for it or can I do it at home without being intervened by family?
903ee2 No.6742
I wonder if you get very dehydrated and then drink some saltwater if it will kill you right away.
28d9fc No.6757
>>5789No, no they don't. They put on a front, maybe. They don't get over it.
c6d55d No.6768
>>3897i'm a little scared to finally go through with it; i haven't even bought a helium tank yet. i want to at least see if these latest pills do me any good; they haven't so far but we'll see. i'm also waiting for that damn euthanasia packet to finally download so i know all my options more thoroughly. it's taking fucking ages, probably because no one trusts the pirate bay anymore even though none of the authors of those books are gonna sue.
592aef No.6778
>>6740As long as you can get past the thirst. Its. I eat a spoonful of sugar to stave off the hunger and thirst. you just have to be commited. look up dehydration on wiki to get an understanding of what you might go tbhough. dont listen to people who say its impssobile. their onlytrying to discourage you from comiting suicide. their the same people that say shotgun to the head is a 10% chance or that exit bags burst lungs.
592aef No.6779
>>6742sugar my man. sugar Can Dehydrate you. well enoug of it. its easire to eat by itself tham salt as well. look it up (:
915c86 No.8193
I made some promises to my home board that I intend to deliver on before offing myself.
1dbac0 No.8206
>>5790
good luck anon may we meet in the afterlife some day
88cd1a No.8207
Hey /suicide/, how lethal does this sound to you.
>brick tied to neck (so I fall head first)
>down a bunch of random meds (probably trazadone, remeron, whatever else is in the cabinet)
>chase that with alcohol.
>lean out on ledge
>belt or ratchet strap around neck, for ligature strangulation
>pass out, let go of edge, and fall back(roughly 100ft)
74a7d7 No.8209
>>8207
I would say that it's overkill, but there's always the risk of fucking up and getting brain damage or something.
>10/10, would use
bfbeb7 No.8217
>>8207
so its basically hoping that you dont get strangeled, hope ,that an 8 story drop will obliterate you, abd rely on some wizardry physics that cause your head to be orientated in a special way by a brick pulling on your neck while you fall with it in mid air
terrible idea tbh, just hang yourself
915c86 No.8222
>>8193
One down, one to go.
88cd1a No.8249
>>8217
>I can tighten the strap to where it's not cutting off airflow, just blood flow
>is an 8 story drop not fatal?
>a loose brick will most certainly lead the fall, that's fucking physics
>using shit tier method that doesn't work a lot of the time, lots more painful
bfbeb7 No.8255
>>8249
>is an 8 story drop not fatal?
around 90% fatal, but if you come out as that 10% you will be fucked over so hard
>a loose brick will lead the fall
in a way that guarantees your head will point straight down and orientate it in the seconds it takes to fall? kk
>using shit tier method that doesn't work a lot of the time, lots more painful
soz, forgot this was the special snowflake suicide board. where tried and true methods are ignored by everyone over methods that have never been done before, that only some dumb depressed fucker believes is a genius idea because he himself invented it.
i swear, soon enough people will discuss overdosing on saltwater or cutting your neck off with a credit card or punching yourself in the stomach before your heart bursts.
aecc7f No.8267
I'm waiting two-three years to pay off a debt, and I want to plan everything out carefully beforehand. I'm also kind of hoping things will turn around in the meantime, but if the last two-three years are indicative of anything, they won't.
298070 No.8268
>>8267
>paying a debt and dying right after that
Fucking why, let me guess, your kids/wife/mother depends on it or something?
b02b47 No.8611
>>3906
they'll do that regardless. every event they hold in the near future will be about you.
the theoretical best day is your birthday.
abec26 No.8613
1. I want to help my parents move first
2. I'm thinking about using an exit bag but need to do more research on it first so I don't fuck it up and end up brain damaged
Maybe I shouldn't kill myself yet I'm only 18 years old, I'm in good health, and my parents want to use their inheritance money so that I can go to college, but I'm really tired of working all my life… and for what? We all end up dead anyway. By not killing myself I'm only delaying the inevitable.
bfbeb7 No.8621
>>8268
so you like answered your own question as part of your question?
bfbeb7 No.8622
>>8611
holy shit i made this fucking thread like 5 months ago.
nice to know my feelings about suicide have barely fluctuated over the past half year.
696c9f No.8627
>>3897
Because when I decided I didn't want to continue living I came to the conclusion that I wanted to hang myself. The issue I have found with this is finding something suitably high and strong enough to do it. If I'm honest I probably could have done it by now but I want to be certain it will hold my weight. (I'm not very heavy just crazy paranoid)
696c9f No.8628
>>6593
It really does seem selfish doesn't it. This is one of the biggest pains to me, I'm only living because I wouldn't want to inflict anything similar to how I feel on to anyone.
bfbeb7 No.8646
>>8628
feel fairly similar
wish i was an edgy 13-year-old again who hated his parents and family again, so that i wouldn't have any reasons to hold myself back from suicide
8a1430 No.8695
>>6716
I'm mad because it makes me jealous people can find joy in the little things in life while I'm too broken to be happy again.
bfbeb7 No.8696
>>8695
>how pathetic people are
>I'm too broken
who is the pathetic little shit in this situation?
8a1430 No.8697
>>8696
Man I just want a reason to be happy again, even if it is some useless small trinket.
8be7c1 No.8700
I'm afraid of surviving and living the rest of my life as a vegetable in a weelchair
bfbeb7 No.8701
>>8700
What method are you shooting for?
bfbeb7 No.12697
75404e No.12702
ed642f No.12728
>>3897
Waiting on my mom to die to lessen the pain.
d7ef0a No.12735
Have to wait till I can get out of my country. Must never call my family and have them hate me. Then I just need to send my ex a sui note and then i'm ready. Only then will I be ready.