No.115
Hey, /wh40k/, since the jews are rebuilding the 2nd temple, ISIS is fucking up the middle east, and Ebolachan is poisoning niggers, tell us your Armageddon stories about fighting the Chaos Gods on Terra.
Nurgle- Trying to defeat him. Have AB+ blood. About to do coup de grace(or is it coup de gras?). Anyway, all that Ebolachan wants is to eliminate the stupid useless eaters who fuck AIDS and Ebola ridden niggers who believe that it's best to fuck a baby virgin to get rid of AIDS and Ebola. She doesn't really care if she's defeated, she just wants to wreck as much havok as possible before she leaves.
Slaanesh- Having trouble with. Slaanesh keeps telling me to fuck as many men(as well as traps and sluts) as possible in the vagina, mouth and ass while doing coke/crystal meth, but I think it's best to love and stick with 2-3 beautiful women, while keeping them all in separate groups(best is 12-15, limit is 25; Sometimes mix and match girls for group sex. If a girl fucks a nigger, drop her) while writing down how trustworthy they are. The best way is to appreciate women for companionship and beauty; which has the 4 loves, Agape, the Divine Eros, and the Golden Mean.
Tzeentch- Tzeentch is trying to read/control my mind as much as possible to tell Khorne the best plan of action. I need to beat both Khorne and Tzeentch to succeed. However, I already know he's tempting me to be as evil("evilevilevilevilevilevilevil") as possible, and the one thing that held my mind together the entire time when I was in that chair was truth, so the best course of action is to make everyone a Christian-Gamer(since there's already Kung Fu Space Jesus in this dimension, it's cool).
Khorne- BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE. Khorne fucking hates my guts because I'm out-trolling Tzeentch with the shortest possible move, thinks I'm a fucking pussy, and now wants an honorable combat at Armageddon. I know the riddle of the sword and are friends with George Foreman and the Green Ranger. I'm planning to get the power of the Godhand, the Masamune/Master Sword, and a Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann Mecha. I want to get Golden Nikes and have some golden d6s that roll 12s most of the time, and get golden d20s that roll 20s most of the time, but it's easy to doubt and be decapitated. I just have to learn the truest move, be patient and mindful, and trust my own actions; not my opponents.
>implying I'm not the God-Emperor of Mankind who traveled back in time to 2014 on the original Terra in a new body(Hotwheels has my old body, but it's currently being restored) before it all went to shit.
No.168
tl:dr