I have this recurring bad habit, and I was wondering if anyone else here has the same problem.
At any given point I usually have a fair-sized collection of legal child-related stuff: NN pics of kids (models and otherwise), drawn lolicon, videos of young girls dancing from YouTube, erotic fiction about children, and so on. All within the bounds of the law (though sometimes only barely), but nothing that I could possibly pretend I had for any reason other than being sexually attracted to children.
Every once in a while, I will have a minor freak-out about the fact that, as I’m sure we all know, those things being technically legal has barely any impact on how seriously and completely they could destroy my life if they were discovered. So in the ensuing fit of anxiety, I will delete the bulk of what I have, keeping only a much smaller number of comparatively low-risk files which I think of as “the essentials”.
Then sometime later – days, weeks, whatever – I will find that I really miss having that collection on hand, and I will go on a downloading binge to rebuild a collection, which is obviously WAY riskier than just having the stuff on a computer or portable HD. And so the cycle goes on and on, ad infinitum, and each time I put myself at a heightened risk of discovery all over again.
Does anyone else here do this same stupid dance over and over?