/blog/ - Your own personal blog

Redirected this post from /b/ since I'm a lazy fagget and didn't bother to check out the sub categories out.

Hi. I just wanted to double confirm if I'm crazy or something.

>I've been on Omegle for less than a week and learned more about different cultures and things about different than I did when I was in secondary school.

So, yesterday I came from my aunt's house. She's kind of poor, sadly, but that's okay.

What's not okay is that their house is crumbling, and they get very little money from welfare, enough to just subsist, yet they're ultra-fanatical voters of the current government.

It's incredible how much a few bucks have come to indoctrinating them, it's like a cult.

They give them some "love" just so they vote for them, but they don't really help them improve their quality of life: they still live in almost squalor, with rooms barely big enough to stand in, and the bathroom is crumbling.

Another thing they don't do is fix their house. They just don't care.

Thing is, we came to my woman cousin's sweet 15 party. She didn't even want one at the beginning of the year, but a few of her friends did one and she decided she'd follow the bandwagon. She's very influentiable, and I don't like it!

There's also the fact that her mother brainwashed her into not even recognizing her grandmother (which would be the sister of my grandfather – yes, my aunt and uncle are cousins!) during the party, even if she was standing right there.

Thing is, she also glorifies my sister, which smokes and drinks and smokes weed, which is also not good. I don't see a bright future for this girl!!!
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I've had the same sexual fantasy of being a woman since I hit puberty. My digit ratios are feminine. My face, though ugly, is feminine. My hips are too wide. My ass is too round. I'm always tired and weak, indicators of low testosterone. I've always liked cute shit more than a man should. All things considered, I'm probably fated to be transexual. But the rest of me, especially the personality, is too male to be compatible with that. That gives me some emotional well being. I don't like or want to do or be anything girly asides from the sex. But the sex is the only thing that really turns me on anymore, no matter how long I avoid fapping.

I've even started jerking off to man on bitch bestiality (#2 fetish) because "at least you're not encouraging yourself to be a fucking tranny".


it's not my fault. it's someone elses. a stressed mother, some toxic plastic, some fertilizer in the water. but it's still a permanent blight on my body and brain.

I don't want to be a tranny. I want to be a normal person, not an objectively inferior degenerate that mocks both sexes with its disrupted and retarded sexual, emotional, and intellectual development.

And to make all that worse I'm fucking autistic

Between hiding in a cabin and fucking a dog whenever those horrible thoughts come in and suicide, suicide is looking more attractive every day. I know some other tranny that wasn't masculinized as much as me will say "just accept urself lol" if they read this, but I genuinely do not enjoy everyday life as a woman. I am not a woman. I am a man trapped in a feminized man's body. Being a woman (i've tried to trap it up for a week, I really have, and I actually passed) disgusts me as much as having a vagina would disgust a normal person. And I do not have a womanly personality. It's just the fucking sex and these stupid wide fucking hips that say "hey, your little fetal self didn't get enough testosterone, lol, inferior specimen kill yourself".

Three-four years back, I was dating this girl. She's like 'yeah I'm really into tumblr' which was really no big deal. Mostly for homestuck/anime shit.

Then, she got into the whole 'sjw' side of tumblr. Starts talking about the patriarchy and white male privilege, most of which I just shrug off. Z few months later, she comes to me and outs herself as trans. "I'm actually a boy in a girl's body". At that point I started distancing myself, and it got worse and worse.

Trans turned into 'genderqueer' because she wanted an excuse to dress like a girl again without getting crucified by her tumblr friends. Genderqueer turned into 'grey-sexual' or whatever the fuck when her friends convinced her our having sex was me oppressing her. Then it turned into me being called a 'shitlord' for doing the things I've always done, that she previously had no problem with(hunting, fishing, making/selling knives). She slowly alienated all of our mutual friends, to the point where they stopped inviting me to social functions because they didn't want her there.

Fast forward a few tedious weeks of us pretty much avoiding each other, her firing snide and hostile comments about literally everything possible. I was planning a party at my place (because fuck you, friends, no way out)and had bought a ton of food and snacks, beer etc, and put a note near all of it, 'do not eat, for party saturday'. Sure enough, I come home, and two 1lb bags of twizzlers are fucking gone. Not a big deal in and of itself, but it's the principle of the thing, you know?

We get into this huge knock-down of a screaming match, where I confront her for alienating all our friends, being snide and hateful because she feels enlightened, and generally being a shitty person all-around since she started using tumblr for hours and hours every day. She retorts with your pretty much textbook tumblr-jargon, 'cis scum' and 'privilege' this, etc etc. I get her and her stuff in the car, and drop her off at her mom's house, tell her 'it's over'. She leaves the car, storms off, and I think 'great, it'll be a nice clean break'. Yeah fucking right.

Two days later of me ignoring calls and texts, her MOTHER shows up at my house, super pissed, spitting venom. 'He said you made him feel like a glutton for yelling about the twizzlers, and he said you blamed him for losing all your friends etc etc'. I just don't say anything and go inside, because arguing wouldn't have solved anything. AnothPost too long. Click here to view the full text.

I was literally just about to make this board.

Sitting here, daydreaming, trying to find anything imaginable to avoid doing more thermodynamics homework, and within a fantasy where something interested happened I thought about sharing that on the internet. But I couldn't share it just anywhere; it would be too personal to share with friends and family members, and I don't have the time or energy to create a formal blog to keep updated. So anonymously, on 8chan, would be good. But where could it be posted? Anywhere you go, everyone's just going to tell you "not your personal blog", and… well, they'd be right. It isn't. There just isn't a space for something like this. So I decided to investigate making one, went looking, and found this.

I like it. I like the idea. This place needs some traffic, though.

In other news, fucking hell thermodynamics is wrecking me. The math isn't hard, it's simple, even, it's just very, very difficult to intuit. A liquid going through a nozzle from large end to small end experiences a DECREASE in density and temperature? Steam going through a turbine travels from superheated vapor, cooling into a saturated liquid, then evaporating into saturated vapor? What the fuck? The numbers all add up, energy and mass is being conserved, the equations check out… but the results are qualitatively queer as hell. And it doesn't help that I have no real world grounding for any of this stuff. The only nozzles I have any real experience with are faucets, and even there I only have experience with one side of that situation, not both.

We need to get more people in this board. And I need more excuses to not work on thermodynamics homework. Anyone who's reading, lets think of some ways to boost traffic here. Has a post been made on /boards/ relating to this? Should we go scrubbing through boards looking for posts that belong, then redirecting them here so more people are aware of it? I'm game for both.

It's 3.30 am
29 degrees Celsius and humidity of 85%

I am dying and laying in a pool of my own sweat.

I'm tired

Oekaki the worst day of your life…

Ah, shucks. I guess you'll have to use MS Paint.